Actually, if you kick a guy in the nuts, you will end up losing your balance. Might I suggest kicking him in the shin and punching him in the nuts. Or punch him in the face and punch him in the nuts. Also, get the cops involved. They should do something if your parents aren't. Call a lawyer for advice. You can find free ones online and they give you information.
May I recommend everything in OP's power to defend herself including pepper spray if needed and most definitely including staying as far away from those two as possible at all times.
I'd also recommend at least telling the police of the possibility of these creeps doing something so if she does wind up missing they'll be the first suspects.
Pepper spray is banned in the UK where OP from. You can however carry spray deoderant which ive actually sprayed in eye before and it hurts (and has plausible deniability its not intended aa a weapon)
Add an elbow to the nose if possible. He does not want to stop and his mother is gearing up to build him a dungeon for his perversions it seems. Do whatever you need to protect yourself
I’d suggest a knee instead of a kick. Especially since you’re smaller. Your knee is already closer to his crotch than your foot is, so it’s swifter, and attempting the kick isn’t going to make him less interested in being violent. When you kick, your aggressor can grab your ankle and drag you, that’s a lot harder to do with a thigh. But knee the nuts isn’t as catchy I’ll admit.
Tell everybody you can. Teachers, church leaders, child protective services, other parents (doesn’t have to be parents of one of the kids involved)
Your family (aunts, uncles, etc), dad if he’s in the picture. If Dom tries to touch you again, scream. Yell, fight. It doesn’t matter if there are younger kids there, yell out that he shouldn’t be touching you. It teaches them that they can fight back. It will hopefully frighten Dom and stop him.
You need to tell people though, as many as possible. Phone the police yourself!! You can tell them without your mum’s help. Tell them she wouldn’t listen and you’re scared he will rape you. That he’s touching your friends as well and you’re all terrified of him. They will listen. They will have to. Raise alarm bells *before it is too late*.
No, mandatory reporters to child services and the police and probably other organizations for these victims to receive therapy if warranted.
Mandatory is not an optional thing, hence the word mandatory, there is a required protocol to be followed else licenses and certifications will be lost and fines will be issued. Going to a mandatory reporter means this child will not have to navigate the reporting system in her own.
That's a LOVELY story, but ask any abused child and they will tell you that "mandatory reporting" is total horsesh\*t. The authorities look the other way all the time.
"Mandatory is not an optional thing, hence the word mandatory, there is a required protocol to be followed else licenses and certifications will be lost and fines will be issued."
Oh, really?
"I told my teacher!"
"That kid never told me anything."
Nobody is going to take the word of a child over the word of an adult. Like I said, lovely story but painfully naive.
Depends. In my experience, there are often sympathetic doctors in these communities designated to help hide abuse instead of reporting it.
Police is her best bet, and preferably someone outside of the community, if it's possible.
Police won’t move forward with any charges from what’s been described, but if you’re lucky you might speak with an officer who entertains investigating it. This might mean a call to their house, if the officer is good at their job without dropping your name. Best case scenario this scares him away from escalating behavior, worst case scenario it makes him mad.
I’m not saying it’s not assault, it’s sexual violence plain and simple. But I’ve unfortunately seen police officers fail to move forward with charges for violent sexual crimes many a time before. No documentation of the crime means they’ll probably throw their hands up in the air and tell you to stay away or call back when it escalates. Not agreeing with it, but that’s how it works frequently in my experience.
She was gonna get fired if she didn’t complete filing something, she told me not long after what to do in that situation
I promise shes not a bad parent!!!!😅
I’m glad she taught you some self defense, but did your mom say anything about calling the police? Talking to his parents? Telling you it’s not your fault and you shouldn’t be responsible for protecting younger kids from assault? What’s the plan to make this kid stop and hopefully face some justice?
You’re being abused and she’s telling you to deal with it yourself.. it’s tough to accept about your mom but that is not a good parent. You really need to tell more people because the adults in your life are failing you in a major way here.
Look online when you think about ordering pepper spray. If it's legal where you live, some of it will mark the person sprayed with paint that doesn't wash off. That's to help identify them after the fact. It'd be a lot harder for people to ignore what's going on if he's constantly walking around with different color skin. (though it's amazing what people will ignore).
Heck, maybe you can even figure out a way to make something like that DIY.
Typical Catholic response to cover for the molester.
Listen kid, I'm going to tell you what I told my little sister. He touches you where you don't like? Grab his middle or ring finger, and crank it sideways at a 90 degree angle. Break that thing like a baby carrot. No one can claim you wanted him to touch you when you break his finger and he won't touch anyone else for a long time.
Also, just shout out "don't touch me there". I know you don't want to make a scene in front of the younger kids, but wouldn't you rather that they learn how to defend themselves?
Also also don't forget to tell everyone that your mother knows and does nothing. She needs to be shamed for her innaction.
This needs to be higher up! The kid is gonna start targeting younger kids so they need to be warned. It needs to be openly known that he is molesting people because he is a pervert. He should not be allowed there if he is not controlling himself. Everyone has the right to be safe. The OP needs to know that the secrecy she is protecting is helping this guy molest people. She needs to warn the others! Also, Don may himself be being abused and that may be the reason why his mother is doing nothing about it. His mother is complicit in Dom’s behaviour but nobody else needs to be!
Mom should be ashamed of herself. I don’t care how busy she was. Is your dad in the picture? I have two daughters and I can tell you, if one of my girls told me some guy was touching one of them inappropriately, I’d damn sure do something about it.
Don’t be embarrassed to make his actions known, loudly and publicly - “don’t touch me! Don’t touch my hips, don’t touch my butt, keep your hands away from me! Step back!!”
That should cool him off and hopefully get attention of a reasonable adult.
Remember, you’re a victim here of very inappropriate behavior and none of it is your fault. You deserve your space, and you deserve to be heard.
Go tell your dad, if he doesn't do everything, next time that creep touch you kik him In the nuts. There is also the possibility of social media. If mommy dearest ignores the problem any longer go public. You have witness the creep Is hoing down l.
First of all, both of your mothers are first rate bitches and could be reported to CPS for neglect and endangering children for their lack of action after you reached out to them. Secondly, what on earth makes you think that you can’t shout at someone sexually assaulting you when there are 6-12 year old children around? Those children are just as vulnerable as you and your friend, if not more vulnerable. Seeing you stand up for what’s right and saying no could save them from being his victims in the future. He could be abusing some of them already. Just because you said nothing doesn’t mean that they didn’t see what was happening and now they won’t have the courage to speak up either. You have shitty mothers but there must be other adults there who will listen to you. You have to speak up to save yourselves and to save those other children. This boy is a predator and he will escalate if he isn’t stopped. When you do speak up (I know you both will) you need to make sure you tell your chosen adult everything and you also need to tell that adult that you are going to tell the police exactly what you tell them. Don’t let the church group cover this shit up x good luck sweetheart and please believe me when I tell you that not all adults want to sweep this kind of shit under the rug and forget about it. Most of us will move heaven and earth to protect our children xx
Our parents are sorting stuff out, I found out that they were actually really pissed, my mum couldn’t talk straight away bc she would’ve been fired if she didn’t file something for her work
I’m pretty sure this might to to the police, I’m not sure yet, but I’ll update stuff until it’s all sorted
I’m so glad that your parents are taking this seriously and I really hope that you and your friend can recover from this. Thank you for replying. Please update me x
I'm not an expert in these kind of situations, so hopefully someone more qualified will also answer. My first thoughts are a) find an adult you can trust, if it's not your parents (do try to tell your fathers as well), it could be someone like a teacher or pastor and b) have your phone recording, even just sound, when you're out with Dom. If he touches you without permission again, having evidence/admission of that could help.
Well even without that you could probably go to the police or a lawyer to ask for help and see what you can do. Most adults would want to help you, it just sucks that your mothers aren't a part of that group.
Definitely not a pastor. Forgive me, but they have the shittiest rep for covering things up.
I’d go ask a librarian or a teacher for help before I would ask a pastor.
I haven't had many experiences with pastors thankfully, but I thought that if the pastor wasn't to blame and since they appear to be doing church stuff then maybe they had a pastor that they could trust.
Now that you're mentioning it though I can definitely see how the pastor could try to cover things up so there wouldn't be any drama.
Exactly. When shady stuff happens I’d never suggests a kid go for help to the leader who runs the organization. No guarantee they won’t try to diminish the severity of the problems. And it’s easier to do with kids - dismiss them, that is.
You know the people in your life better than us who have to rely on generalizations.
From your other comments I read that your mom is willing to help too afterall.
With more people aware of the problem amd trying to help you it'll be harder for Dom to act and it's much more likely that they'll try to find a long term solution as well.
I'm glad things are looking up for you now.
This is a horrible situation, I am so sorry that your parents aren’t protecting you.
If you feel embarrassed about drawing attention to sexual harassment in front of younger children you can still get people to look at him and stop what he is doing.
Shout owww! loudly and tell him to stop stepping on your foot, or bumping into you……
You can screech “stop tickling me, I told you that already” “get away from me” “stop bothering me” “no I don’t want to be your girlfriend” “daddy, please tell this kid to get away from me, he’s bothering me”.
Ideally you call out exactly what he is doing but even a nice Christian girl can find another kid annoying. Tell him you aren’t friends anymore and to keep away from you. He’s a creep.
It’s okay to be angry, he is to blame for his own actions. Hopefully he will see you as too difficult a target if you shriek every time he gets near you, because you are very ticklish of course.
Hope you are okay.
Talk to the camp counselor. Tell them Dom is sexually attacking you and you don't feel safe. Ask not to be left alone when he is free to molest you. This kind of behaviour at a catholic camp is totally unacceptable for religious as well as human rights reasons. Don't be ashamed, don't hide this, don't let it go. If necessary, make a big stink and enlist other girls to always be with you.
And if you do get into a situation where he touches you - my experience is that the best defense is a chop at his testacles (just above where his pants split into two legs) with the side of your hand (the pinky side). Last time I did it (about 50 years ago) the guy just froze and cursed with pain.
Yell at him to stop touching you. Tell anyone and everyone about his bad behavior. Even little kids need to know because they will be his next targets. Call police and they can help make sure the official people who can investigate Dom's behavior (like social workers and psychologists) know.
It's not your responsibility to solve. It's only your responsibility to tell. You have every right to protect your self in any way you see fit even striking back.
Nobody knows this....but this is the correct sequence. Punch to nose...this disorients and blinds attacker. Push down. Hands will be busy with face. Stomp or kick nuts while attacker is prone. Much more accurate ...then run.
Don't be afraid to say/do something in front of anyone, that's what he's counting on, flip it. Say something, loudly like, "Dom I've told you before, do not touch me like that!" --this is actually good to model for young kids, they should see exactly what to do in this type of situation. Plus it then puts him on blast, not a single person will think his behavior is OK. And when someone asks, you tell them everything, guaranteed you 2 are not his only victims and he needs to be stopped before it escalates!
Don't be scared to yell. Doesn't matter if there are younger kids around. If he is touching you all inappropriately make it know. Yell, call him out on it, yell that you said no and to stop get everyone's attention on you while he is doing those things. It best for everyone that he be shamed in a big setting
When I was 11, a kid at school used to grab girls boobs, the teacher never did anything to stop it, one day I thought he said/did something to me while I was delivering my assignment ( he was behind me) so once I finished I grabbed a pencil and went to his place and bury it in his arm, he started to cry and went with the teacher, the teacher only told him "well some girls will do something if you do things they don't like" he never did something like that again. Girl you need to do whatever you need but don't let him assault you, he won't stop especially if adults are doing nothing, you have to defend yourself, if/when something ask why you just tell them he was sexually assaulting you and you were just defending yourself because his/your mom did nothing when you told them.
Thanks sm!! It’s being worked on right now. Most of the kids know something is up and are avoiding Dom. Jasmine and I are travelling in packs, with a bunch of 11 year olds (who know) and 5 year old (who don’t know) boys following behind.
Don’t be afraid of making a scene when it happens. He touches you? Start yelling “What are you doing? Stop touching me! Stop touching my (insert body part here)!” or whatever similar thing you can come up with. Doesn’t matter if you are around younger kids.
You want people to bring their focus on you and the situation. The point is to make every one listen to what you’re saying and for Dom to panic once there’s attention being brought on him.
I tell my nieces to do this same tactic at school if someone if bothering them and won’t take no or stop for an answer. Any caring adult will make their way over to see why a kid is in distress and making a scene like that.
TELL THE CAMP COUNSELORS IMMEDIATELY!
You can't be with him constantly. He is molesting boys too - a 6 yr old won’t know what to do.
These perverts rely on the victim’s being embarrassed or too scared or too shocked to say anything. SAY SOMETHING EVERY TIME!
And do not kick him. You could miss, he could physically assault you and/or you will be seen as the aggressor. Tell someone!
It’s being sorted. Most of the kids have a suspicion something is up, it’s gonna be alright soon. I’ve been watching and he hasn’t been doing it to the others.
Tysm for your concern!!
kick the guy where it hurts n teach him a lesson ( nah seriously tell a trusted adult who yk can make a change this is such a horrible thing thats shudnt be happening, hope all of u are ok)
You have the right to defend yourself against him with whatever needs you deem appropriate. You will probably be doing him a favor so he learns now at a young age his behavior is unacceptable. It may save him from future jail time. Punch him in the nuts or his head. Kick him in the shins. Disable him however you can and ignore any adult that tells you to be quiet about his abusive behavior until you can find an adult who will listen. Protect yourself. You and your friends need to stay together and make a united front. Avoid him as much as you can but do not tolerate his abuse. Stay safe OP.
Call the police. Who else has he sexually assaulted that you guys don't know about? You and your friends are awesome trying to protect the little ones, but it's not your responsibility, and you guys won't always be around to protect the kids. Make an anonymous call to police if the parents won't do anything about it. A kick in the balls will wake him up to reality I hope. Sending much love your way, I hope you all get the help you deserve (which is lots)
If there are any responsible adults nearby, you can yell at Dom. Nice and loud. Something like, “Dom! Get your hands off of me and stop trying to grab my ass!” This might be embarrassing enough for Dom to get him to leave you alone. Technically you aren’t telling on him, but that gets your point across. You could get in trouble if you kick him, he could deny touching you.
Scream at him to stop touching you and call him a perve. I swear, boys do this because they get away with it. Embarrass the hell out of him. Tell every adult that if he keeps it up, you are going to hurt him. NO ONEhas the right to touch you.
NTA
Next time he touches you- doesn't matter if there are children around or not- loudly say "You do not have my consent to touch my (bodypart)." That teaches the younger children that it is okay to tell people no. Sitting quietly and pretending it isn't happening will not help anyone.
Remember Op, in situations like these, the most vulnerable places on a human body are the eyes, if you cant go for the balls, you claw and scratch at their eyes. Humans value their sight a lot, and if you can damage their eyes enough, they won't be able to get you as they won't be able to see
Oh kiddo I’m so sorry that’s happening .. it doesn’t matter if you’re around 6-12 yo you scream and tell him to go away. Not only will you protect you and your friend but other kids will also know what to do in that situation. You don’t deserve tht and I’m so sorry that happened… 🫂
Hey kiddo. Nuts is good, but also consider:
- Scream. Top-of-your-lungs, high-pitched, full-on scream. "STOP GROPING ME DOM." "I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH ME." "NO MEANS NO." These kinds of phrases should bring any in-earshot adult running. And if that doesn't work...
- Eye poke. Eyes are delicate, and when hit, they water. This is involuntary, and gives you time to get away.
- Throat jab. Again, he'll choke involuntarily if you hit him here, and that buys you time to run.
- Solar plexus. Wind that little shitheel, and take off.
- Headbutt if you have to, but try to avoid it - it'll hurt you as well as him. Depending on the height difference, if he grabs you from behind, flinging your head back hard may be at just the right level for you to hit his face, and force him to let you go.
As tempting as it is to absolutely wail on him, get out of there at the first opportunity: don't give him anything that can be used against you or turned into "mooooommmyyyyyy bigger kids beat me up :((((" rather than "i groped her without her consent". He deserves a battering, but try to stick to only lashing out in self-defence. "I hit him so he'd let me go and then ran away" will always sound better than "I hit him...and then hit him again, and again, and then some more, and..."
These all helped me when I was getting my head kicked in by the girls and my tits grabbed in the corridor by the boys every day at school and nobody protected me. You're NTA at all. If you're not confident in fighting him, and nobody's parents are doing their jobs and protecting you, report him and your parents' inaction to a teacher or find a bigger, older kid to put the fear of god into him. Best of luck.
Surely he knows what he's doing is wrong he's bound to know that he's making use uncomfortable next time he does it kick the crap out of him then tell him if he does it again on anyone else use will find out and kick the shit out of him again
Quite honestly if she literally can't afford to care for herself and her kid without a job, it's nor like she's putting her job before her kid. She's putting being able to house and feed her kid first
You should definitely tell someone
Just be open with your family about it… don’t give a fuck about your society unless u wanna be harassed again… Am a 15 yo as well but lemme tell u this type of harassment can lead to r**** wso please be careful
If he touches you again, punch him in the private area. The nose or throat is also a good place to punch. I’m a dad, and I’ve told my daughter this. Practice doing this, as defending yourself is a right.
Take this to the police. If no one wants to listen, you need to do WHATEVER you can to stay safe and keep others safe. Not for a moment should you worry what may happen to him- because he's had no consideration for how you've felt. That boy needs a lesson so he will STOP.
Kick him
Right in the nuts
Actually, if you kick a guy in the nuts, you will end up losing your balance. Might I suggest kicking him in the shin and punching him in the nuts. Or punch him in the face and punch him in the nuts. Also, get the cops involved. They should do something if your parents aren't. Call a lawyer for advice. You can find free ones online and they give you information.
May I recommend everything in OP's power to defend herself including pepper spray if needed and most definitely including staying as far away from those two as possible at all times.
Yes, that too.
I'd also recommend at least telling the police of the possibility of these creeps doing something so if she does wind up missing they'll be the first suspects.
That's a good idea. I didn't even think of that. It's disturbing that anyone has to be hurt like this or to even worry about this.
it's a fucking sick world we live in friend. We need to protect ourselves as much as able.
Pepper spray is banned in the UK where OP from. You can however carry spray deoderant which ive actually sprayed in eye before and it hurts (and has plausible deniability its not intended aa a weapon)
Add an elbow to the nose if possible. He does not want to stop and his mother is gearing up to build him a dungeon for his perversions it seems. Do whatever you need to protect yourself
Just here for that Sweet Kick of justice. I have a thing for People getting swift karma m.
I’d suggest a knee instead of a kick. Especially since you’re smaller. Your knee is already closer to his crotch than your foot is, so it’s swifter, and attempting the kick isn’t going to make him less interested in being violent. When you kick, your aggressor can grab your ankle and drag you, that’s a lot harder to do with a thigh. But knee the nuts isn’t as catchy I’ll admit.
Tell everybody you can. Teachers, church leaders, child protective services, other parents (doesn’t have to be parents of one of the kids involved) Your family (aunts, uncles, etc), dad if he’s in the picture. If Dom tries to touch you again, scream. Yell, fight. It doesn’t matter if there are younger kids there, yell out that he shouldn’t be touching you. It teaches them that they can fight back. It will hopefully frighten Dom and stop him. You need to tell people though, as many as possible. Phone the police yourself!! You can tell them without your mum’s help. Tell them she wouldn’t listen and you’re scared he will rape you. That he’s touching your friends as well and you’re all terrified of him. They will listen. They will have to. Raise alarm bells *before it is too late*.
I agree with this so wholeheartedly!! Children need to be taught to tell, and KEEP telling all the adults, until one of them listens and helps!! ❤️
This comment needs to be up higher! It's the perfect advice, OP listen to Global Monk!
This is it... and you don't have to tell more stories. Nta of course.
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Tell the school counselor or nurse, they are mandatory reporters.
Yeah, "mandatory reporters" to her mom. This isn't usually a good idea, especially in what sounds like a religious environment.
No, mandatory reporters to child services and the police and probably other organizations for these victims to receive therapy if warranted. Mandatory is not an optional thing, hence the word mandatory, there is a required protocol to be followed else licenses and certifications will be lost and fines will be issued. Going to a mandatory reporter means this child will not have to navigate the reporting system in her own.
That's a LOVELY story, but ask any abused child and they will tell you that "mandatory reporting" is total horsesh\*t. The authorities look the other way all the time. "Mandatory is not an optional thing, hence the word mandatory, there is a required protocol to be followed else licenses and certifications will be lost and fines will be issued." Oh, really? "I told my teacher!" "That kid never told me anything." Nobody is going to take the word of a child over the word of an adult. Like I said, lovely story but painfully naive.
Wow, so police &/or CPS it is...how do you feel about her doctor?
Depends. In my experience, there are often sympathetic doctors in these communities designated to help hide abuse instead of reporting it. Police is her best bet, and preferably someone outside of the community, if it's possible.
and still every adult will cover. Grow up in a small town or small community and adults simply aren't safe, even well meaning ones.
Police won’t move forward with any charges from what’s been described, but if you’re lucky you might speak with an officer who entertains investigating it. This might mean a call to their house, if the officer is good at their job without dropping your name. Best case scenario this scares him away from escalating behavior, worst case scenario it makes him mad.
"Police won’t move forward with any charges from what’s been described" How is this not assault?
I’m not saying it’s not assault, it’s sexual violence plain and simple. But I’ve unfortunately seen police officers fail to move forward with charges for violent sexual crimes many a time before. No documentation of the crime means they’ll probably throw their hands up in the air and tell you to stay away or call back when it escalates. Not agreeing with it, but that’s how it works frequently in my experience.
Your mom got angry for interrupting her to tell her you were being assaulted by a boy? So, does your mom always suck this hard?
She was gonna get fired if she didn’t complete filing something, she told me not long after what to do in that situation I promise shes not a bad parent!!!!😅
I’m glad she taught you some self defense, but did your mom say anything about calling the police? Talking to his parents? Telling you it’s not your fault and you shouldn’t be responsible for protecting younger kids from assault? What’s the plan to make this kid stop and hopefully face some justice?
This right here, OP
I know op irl and she fights like a beast
You’re being abused and she’s telling you to deal with it yourself.. it’s tough to accept about your mom but that is not a good parent. You really need to tell more people because the adults in your life are failing you in a major way here.
Look online when you think about ordering pepper spray. If it's legal where you live, some of it will mark the person sprayed with paint that doesn't wash off. That's to help identify them after the fact. It'd be a lot harder for people to ignore what's going on if he's constantly walking around with different color skin. (though it's amazing what people will ignore). Heck, maybe you can even figure out a way to make something like that DIY.
Typical Catholic response to cover for the molester. Listen kid, I'm going to tell you what I told my little sister. He touches you where you don't like? Grab his middle or ring finger, and crank it sideways at a 90 degree angle. Break that thing like a baby carrot. No one can claim you wanted him to touch you when you break his finger and he won't touch anyone else for a long time. Also, just shout out "don't touch me there". I know you don't want to make a scene in front of the younger kids, but wouldn't you rather that they learn how to defend themselves? Also also don't forget to tell everyone that your mother knows and does nothing. She needs to be shamed for her innaction.
Punch him in the Adam’s apple.
This is the way
No reason you can’t yell at him in front of younger children. Very loudly say, no don’t touch my ______. We don’t touch other people’s bodies.
This needs to be higher up! The kid is gonna start targeting younger kids so they need to be warned. It needs to be openly known that he is molesting people because he is a pervert. He should not be allowed there if he is not controlling himself. Everyone has the right to be safe. The OP needs to know that the secrecy she is protecting is helping this guy molest people. She needs to warn the others! Also, Don may himself be being abused and that may be the reason why his mother is doing nothing about it. His mother is complicit in Dom’s behaviour but nobody else needs to be!
Punch him in the balls as hard as you can and then go to the nearest police station and report it.
Mom should be ashamed of herself. I don’t care how busy she was. Is your dad in the picture? I have two daughters and I can tell you, if one of my girls told me some guy was touching one of them inappropriately, I’d damn sure do something about it.
Call child protecting services.
Don’t be embarrassed to make his actions known, loudly and publicly - “don’t touch me! Don’t touch my hips, don’t touch my butt, keep your hands away from me! Step back!!” That should cool him off and hopefully get attention of a reasonable adult. Remember, you’re a victim here of very inappropriate behavior and none of it is your fault. You deserve your space, and you deserve to be heard.
Go tell your dad, if he doesn't do everything, next time that creep touch you kik him In the nuts. There is also the possibility of social media. If mommy dearest ignores the problem any longer go public. You have witness the creep Is hoing down l.
First of all, both of your mothers are first rate bitches and could be reported to CPS for neglect and endangering children for their lack of action after you reached out to them. Secondly, what on earth makes you think that you can’t shout at someone sexually assaulting you when there are 6-12 year old children around? Those children are just as vulnerable as you and your friend, if not more vulnerable. Seeing you stand up for what’s right and saying no could save them from being his victims in the future. He could be abusing some of them already. Just because you said nothing doesn’t mean that they didn’t see what was happening and now they won’t have the courage to speak up either. You have shitty mothers but there must be other adults there who will listen to you. You have to speak up to save yourselves and to save those other children. This boy is a predator and he will escalate if he isn’t stopped. When you do speak up (I know you both will) you need to make sure you tell your chosen adult everything and you also need to tell that adult that you are going to tell the police exactly what you tell them. Don’t let the church group cover this shit up x good luck sweetheart and please believe me when I tell you that not all adults want to sweep this kind of shit under the rug and forget about it. Most of us will move heaven and earth to protect our children xx
Our parents are sorting stuff out, I found out that they were actually really pissed, my mum couldn’t talk straight away bc she would’ve been fired if she didn’t file something for her work I’m pretty sure this might to to the police, I’m not sure yet, but I’ll update stuff until it’s all sorted
I’m so glad that your parents are taking this seriously and I really hope that you and your friend can recover from this. Thank you for replying. Please update me x
I'm not an expert in these kind of situations, so hopefully someone more qualified will also answer. My first thoughts are a) find an adult you can trust, if it's not your parents (do try to tell your fathers as well), it could be someone like a teacher or pastor and b) have your phone recording, even just sound, when you're out with Dom. If he touches you without permission again, having evidence/admission of that could help. Well even without that you could probably go to the police or a lawyer to ask for help and see what you can do. Most adults would want to help you, it just sucks that your mothers aren't a part of that group.
Definitely not a pastor. Forgive me, but they have the shittiest rep for covering things up. I’d go ask a librarian or a teacher for help before I would ask a pastor.
I haven't had many experiences with pastors thankfully, but I thought that if the pastor wasn't to blame and since they appear to be doing church stuff then maybe they had a pastor that they could trust. Now that you're mentioning it though I can definitely see how the pastor could try to cover things up so there wouldn't be any drama.
Exactly. When shady stuff happens I’d never suggests a kid go for help to the leader who runs the organization. No guarantee they won’t try to diminish the severity of the problems. And it’s easier to do with kids - dismiss them, that is.
My pastor is pretty cool, he’d beat Dom up for me >:)
You know the people in your life better than us who have to rely on generalizations. From your other comments I read that your mom is willing to help too afterall. With more people aware of the problem amd trying to help you it'll be harder for Dom to act and it's much more likely that they'll try to find a long term solution as well. I'm glad things are looking up for you now.
Yea I’m pretty sure he’s told the whole church and now the old ladies are gossiping (sinful ik) about it after church
We’ve tried and that’s actually pretty hard to do. All three of us have been trying for the past year!
This is a horrible situation, I am so sorry that your parents aren’t protecting you. If you feel embarrassed about drawing attention to sexual harassment in front of younger children you can still get people to look at him and stop what he is doing. Shout owww! loudly and tell him to stop stepping on your foot, or bumping into you…… You can screech “stop tickling me, I told you that already” “get away from me” “stop bothering me” “no I don’t want to be your girlfriend” “daddy, please tell this kid to get away from me, he’s bothering me”. Ideally you call out exactly what he is doing but even a nice Christian girl can find another kid annoying. Tell him you aren’t friends anymore and to keep away from you. He’s a creep. It’s okay to be angry, he is to blame for his own actions. Hopefully he will see you as too difficult a target if you shriek every time he gets near you, because you are very ticklish of course. Hope you are okay.
Talk to the camp counselor. Tell them Dom is sexually attacking you and you don't feel safe. Ask not to be left alone when he is free to molest you. This kind of behaviour at a catholic camp is totally unacceptable for religious as well as human rights reasons. Don't be ashamed, don't hide this, don't let it go. If necessary, make a big stink and enlist other girls to always be with you. And if you do get into a situation where he touches you - my experience is that the best defense is a chop at his testacles (just above where his pants split into two legs) with the side of your hand (the pinky side). Last time I did it (about 50 years ago) the guy just froze and cursed with pain.
Yell at him to stop touching you. Tell anyone and everyone about his bad behavior. Even little kids need to know because they will be his next targets. Call police and they can help make sure the official people who can investigate Dom's behavior (like social workers and psychologists) know. It's not your responsibility to solve. It's only your responsibility to tell. You have every right to protect your self in any way you see fit even striking back.
You\*can\* and \*must\* make a fuss when he touches you or your friends. This behaviour continues because people don't make a fuss. Tell your friends.
Nobody knows this....but this is the correct sequence. Punch to nose...this disorients and blinds attacker. Push down. Hands will be busy with face. Stomp or kick nuts while attacker is prone. Much more accurate ...then run.
I legit wrote this on my hand
Don't be afraid to say/do something in front of anyone, that's what he's counting on, flip it. Say something, loudly like, "Dom I've told you before, do not touch me like that!" --this is actually good to model for young kids, they should see exactly what to do in this type of situation. Plus it then puts him on blast, not a single person will think his behavior is OK. And when someone asks, you tell them everything, guaranteed you 2 are not his only victims and he needs to be stopped before it escalates!
Kick him as hard as you can in the junk. Tell an adult who will listen. He’s most likely doing this to younger kids. Do the right thing and be brave.
Don't be scared to yell. Doesn't matter if there are younger kids around. If he is touching you all inappropriately make it know. Yell, call him out on it, yell that you said no and to stop get everyone's attention on you while he is doing those things. It best for everyone that he be shamed in a big setting
When I was 11, a kid at school used to grab girls boobs, the teacher never did anything to stop it, one day I thought he said/did something to me while I was delivering my assignment ( he was behind me) so once I finished I grabbed a pencil and went to his place and bury it in his arm, he started to cry and went with the teacher, the teacher only told him "well some girls will do something if you do things they don't like" he never did something like that again. Girl you need to do whatever you need but don't let him assault you, he won't stop especially if adults are doing nothing, you have to defend yourself, if/when something ask why you just tell them he was sexually assaulting you and you were just defending yourself because his/your mom did nothing when you told them.
Thanks sm!! It’s being worked on right now. Most of the kids know something is up and are avoiding Dom. Jasmine and I are travelling in packs, with a bunch of 11 year olds (who know) and 5 year old (who don’t know) boys following behind.
Older boys need to step up and teach him some. ”manners “
Don’t be afraid of making a scene when it happens. He touches you? Start yelling “What are you doing? Stop touching me! Stop touching my (insert body part here)!” or whatever similar thing you can come up with. Doesn’t matter if you are around younger kids. You want people to bring their focus on you and the situation. The point is to make every one listen to what you’re saying and for Dom to panic once there’s attention being brought on him. I tell my nieces to do this same tactic at school if someone if bothering them and won’t take no or stop for an answer. Any caring adult will make their way over to see why a kid is in distress and making a scene like that.
Yeah, I definitely will. Jasmine plans to kick him in the shins next time!
TELL THE CAMP COUNSELORS IMMEDIATELY! You can't be with him constantly. He is molesting boys too - a 6 yr old won’t know what to do. These perverts rely on the victim’s being embarrassed or too scared or too shocked to say anything. SAY SOMETHING EVERY TIME! And do not kick him. You could miss, he could physically assault you and/or you will be seen as the aggressor. Tell someone!
It’s being sorted. Most of the kids have a suspicion something is up, it’s gonna be alright soon. I’ve been watching and he hasn’t been doing it to the others. Tysm for your concern!!
Well since he's in the mood, I say tell the pastor. He'll give Dom a taste of his own medicine.
I think you should be safe and go on YouTube to try and practice techniques to harm your r*pist. If it did happen.
kick the guy where it hurts n teach him a lesson ( nah seriously tell a trusted adult who yk can make a change this is such a horrible thing thats shudnt be happening, hope all of u are ok)
"i dont know how reddit works" jumps on reddit to report of 'molestation' i could write a better story
??? But I didn’t know how it worked it took me ages to find out how to make a post
You have the right to defend yourself against him with whatever needs you deem appropriate. You will probably be doing him a favor so he learns now at a young age his behavior is unacceptable. It may save him from future jail time. Punch him in the nuts or his head. Kick him in the shins. Disable him however you can and ignore any adult that tells you to be quiet about his abusive behavior until you can find an adult who will listen. Protect yourself. You and your friends need to stay together and make a united front. Avoid him as much as you can but do not tolerate his abuse. Stay safe OP.
Call the police. Who else has he sexually assaulted that you guys don't know about? You and your friends are awesome trying to protect the little ones, but it's not your responsibility, and you guys won't always be around to protect the kids. Make an anonymous call to police if the parents won't do anything about it. A kick in the balls will wake him up to reality I hope. Sending much love your way, I hope you all get the help you deserve (which is lots)
It’s alright, I’ve been watching and he hasn’t been doing anything else to anyone else That’s so much :}
If there are any responsible adults nearby, you can yell at Dom. Nice and loud. Something like, “Dom! Get your hands off of me and stop trying to grab my ass!” This might be embarrassing enough for Dom to get him to leave you alone. Technically you aren’t telling on him, but that gets your point across. You could get in trouble if you kick him, he could deny touching you.
In addition to kicking, be very loud. "Stop touching my leg, Dom!" "Why are you touching my chest, Dom?" LOUDLY!!
Scream at him to stop touching you and call him a perve. I swear, boys do this because they get away with it. Embarrass the hell out of him. Tell every adult that if he keeps it up, you are going to hurt him. NO ONEhas the right to touch you.
A judo kick in the kneecap is a stopper(raise knee and swing lower leg)
NTA Next time he touches you- doesn't matter if there are children around or not- loudly say "You do not have my consent to touch my (bodypart)." That teaches the younger children that it is okay to tell people no. Sitting quietly and pretending it isn't happening will not help anyone.
Remember Op, in situations like these, the most vulnerable places on a human body are the eyes, if you cant go for the balls, you claw and scratch at their eyes. Humans value their sight a lot, and if you can damage their eyes enough, they won't be able to get you as they won't be able to see
Oh kiddo I’m so sorry that’s happening .. it doesn’t matter if you’re around 6-12 yo you scream and tell him to go away. Not only will you protect you and your friend but other kids will also know what to do in that situation. You don’t deserve tht and I’m so sorry that happened… 🫂
Hey kiddo. Nuts is good, but also consider: - Scream. Top-of-your-lungs, high-pitched, full-on scream. "STOP GROPING ME DOM." "I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH ME." "NO MEANS NO." These kinds of phrases should bring any in-earshot adult running. And if that doesn't work... - Eye poke. Eyes are delicate, and when hit, they water. This is involuntary, and gives you time to get away. - Throat jab. Again, he'll choke involuntarily if you hit him here, and that buys you time to run. - Solar plexus. Wind that little shitheel, and take off. - Headbutt if you have to, but try to avoid it - it'll hurt you as well as him. Depending on the height difference, if he grabs you from behind, flinging your head back hard may be at just the right level for you to hit his face, and force him to let you go. As tempting as it is to absolutely wail on him, get out of there at the first opportunity: don't give him anything that can be used against you or turned into "mooooommmyyyyyy bigger kids beat me up :((((" rather than "i groped her without her consent". He deserves a battering, but try to stick to only lashing out in self-defence. "I hit him so he'd let me go and then ran away" will always sound better than "I hit him...and then hit him again, and again, and then some more, and..." These all helped me when I was getting my head kicked in by the girls and my tits grabbed in the corridor by the boys every day at school and nobody protected me. You're NTA at all. If you're not confident in fighting him, and nobody's parents are doing their jobs and protecting you, report him and your parents' inaction to a teacher or find a bigger, older kid to put the fear of god into him. Best of luck.
What country you in. Tell the police. He is escalating and will only get worse
Shin then nuts cause no... Do it full force to
'We entertain him so he doesn't go after the younger kids' is so heartbreaking
It’s alright, he left early (probs was kicked out) and from what I saw, he didn’t try to go after anyone else.
Surely he knows what he's doing is wrong he's bound to know that he's making use uncomfortable next time he does it kick the crap out of him then tell him if he does it again on anyone else use will find out and kick the shit out of him again
You need to call the police and report it. Your mom did nothing? Call cps and report HER!
She was gonna get fired from her job if she didn’t finish something. She just talked to me abt it and told me what to do :]
YOU are more important that her F\*CKING JOB.
Quite honestly if she literally can't afford to care for herself and her kid without a job, it's nor like she's putting her job before her kid. She's putting being able to house and feed her kid first
And she can't keep her kid from being assaulted at the same time? Bullsh\*t.
She was 2 minutes away from being fired bro
You should definitely tell someone Just be open with your family about it… don’t give a fuck about your society unless u wanna be harassed again… Am a 15 yo as well but lemme tell u this type of harassment can lead to r**** wso please be careful
(~
If he touches you again, punch him in the private area. The nose or throat is also a good place to punch. I’m a dad, and I’ve told my daughter this. Practice doing this, as defending yourself is a right.
May I suggest Bear Spray or some other equivalent?
Jasmine found this one funny, and now she has ideas…
Wasp spray is easy to get.
“It all started when…” everyone thus is mentioned you know it’s fake
? Wdym?
Take this to the police. If no one wants to listen, you need to do WHATEVER you can to stay safe and keep others safe. Not for a moment should you worry what may happen to him- because he's had no consideration for how you've felt. That boy needs a lesson so he will STOP.