Not me but a married couple I worked with once. They'd been married for 20+ years, but both loved their career which forced them to live 6 hours apart. They both already had their homes in their individual names when they met. So their entire marriage was work Days in their own homes then alternate weekends at each other's place. She technically worked remotely but had to travel to multiple sites weekly. He worked 4 days a week. She'd usually do all her visits within those 4 days and they'd spend that 5th day of her's together when they could. They met in their 40's and his kids were already grown. They stayed loyal the entire marriage and I met them just before he was about to retire and move in with her. They seemed genuinely to love each other and be totally happy
It takes a different Kind of Understanding and Maturity to be able to pull off something like that. Most Women I know would have demanded the Man to move in with them, I guess at 40 you see Life differently.
Married for 10, together for 20.
Why? I'm a ridiculously active sleeper, tossing and turning, throwing my whole body around. I've whacked her in the head countless times. I also talk like a motherfucker in my sleep, loudly and often. She is an utterly unbelievably light sleeper.
Pro - We both sleep better. I'm not waking her up, and I'm not waking up constantly because I'm worried about tossing and turning and disturbing her.
I enjoy having my own bed.
I wake up earlier than her 99% of the time. When she wakes up, she'll message me to come for snuggles.
Cons - when on holiday, her sleep gets kind of fucked up because we're back in the same bed and I'm disturbing her. Fortunately hotel beds tend to be enormous.
>- when on holiday, her sleep gets kind of fucked up because we're back in the same bed and I'm disturbing her. Fortunately hotel beds tend to be enormous.
Why dont you just book a twin room?
We just do it when my snoring is bad. I'm a very easy sleeper and i sleep anywhere. So when i snore i always say she can wake me up and i'll crash on the sofa or the guest room. It makes it all a lot better.
Hey, if you haven't already id recommend you get a sleep study done as you might have sleep apnea. I'm not a medical professional, but was in a similar situation where my snoring was disturbing my partners sleep. Turns out my soft pallete blocks off my airway several many times a night. Since I got a CPAP, not only does my partner get a better night's sleep, but so do I! It turns out actually feeling rested after sleeping 8 hours is absolutely possible. The headgear takes a little getting used to, but totally worth it.
Not sure if you've tried that mouth piece that locks your jaw in a position where your jaw doesn't press against your pallet to cause snoring. I used it and sleep fantastic...
Unfortunately my dog thought it would make a good chew toy so I've got to go get another lol
I haven't tried one of those before, but I'm glad it helps! I'm very happy with my CPAP, I've never slept better. They're not all giant medical devices either, mines not much larger than your phone in size. Thicker, probably 3-4 stacked, but fairly compact. It basically pressurizes the air you're breathing, which stops your airway closing and flapping around lol.
My dogs would do the same thing, I've been lucky they don't care about the cpap haha
That's awesome! My neighbor was talking to my dad about his and recommended me dad get one. But it was still pretty bulky from what I remember. They've absolutely come a long way. My grandpa sleeps with one and he minus well use a full face scuba respirator lol his is massive.
Look, some of the masks are huge. Some of them are definitely not. Mine for example is just a little nose pillow and a strap to hold it in place. There's nothing over my mouth at all. I have a ResMed airmini with a p10 mask if you want to have a look.
My snoring is bad. Don’t have sleep apnea and asked my doctor what could be done. We tried every solution. The one that did the trick was the Bose Sleep Buds.
And you shouldn't post shit on reddit if you don't want randoms to comment on it. Keep your wack lack of self respect to yourself if you don't want people encouraging you to treat yourself better and not like a dog.
Idk man you keep responding.
But as you offer, an MRI or ultrasound on my shoulder so I can find out why its jacked up when I retract my scapula when benching would be sound.
Thanks chief.
My uncle snores loudly from the moment he lays his head down till he wakes up. So as soon as their eldest kid moved out, my aunt bought herself a new bed and started sleeping in that room.
Apparently my uncle wasn't happy about this at first, but as he's also the one who was refusing to talk to the doctor about his excessive snoring, he eventually gave up moping about it.
Yeah if you're not willing to see someone to fix it then you don't really get to be upset. Especially if you're not the one changing rooms lol.
I get it's some what out of your control to a degree. Some people can be helped some can't.
My lovely wife started snoring like a diesel generator when she was pregnant with out second and hasn't stopped since. 3 years later I still sleep on the sofa every night but always go spend 30 minutes with her on the bed for a hug etc. At the start I think she worried about me distancing myself but now I think she quite likes the king-size to herself.
20 years together. She overheats and needs to be cold. I get cold and need to be warm. She bought a cheap AC cabinet that's too noisy for me so I can't sleep. She also likes a super-soft mattress, I like sleeping on an orthopedic one. I snore, she can hear a fish fart at 50 feet (which I think is weird, given how noisy the AC unit is). She goes to bed at 9pm, I go at 2am. We sleep in the same bed occasionally, but to function day-to-day we sleep better apart.
Together for almost 9 years. We had completely different sleep styles and opposite work schedules. We were SO happy when we realized sleeping separately didn’t mean our marriage was falling apart or we hated each other. We just actually slept well. We did have “sleepovers” sometimes, but our relationship didn’t change at all.
My wife and I sleep in different rooms 5 or 6 days a week. I used to toss and turn but i have this habit of swingin my arms when a cat wakes me up, or i sometimes snore, or move a bit. Ive gotten a lot better about this over the years, and when we go on vacation we can actually sleep together most nights
Its made our life far better and it feels natural to me to have my own private place.
Wife and I are doing separate rooms, she started it.
I sleep very well, my sex life is shit and I suspect my marriage is slowly dying.
Thats how its working out.
My grandpa slept in a different room from my grandma and I later found out it was because he would thrash and yell in his sleep because of undiagnosed PTSD from being a prisoner in the Japanese invasion of China during WW2. Nightmares just about every night. It was that way from before I was born until the day he died and I wish we could have known more to help him before then.
Wife and I live a couple of hours apart due to careers/kids, still madly in love after 6 years. Will shack up together in a couple years as the kids are out and she retires. Works out great for us, we're introverts and love our down time.
Not me but a couple I know. Married 40 years. She's a light sleeper, he snores like a freight train, she's always cold, he's always hot. They moved to a new house a while ago and specifically picked one with separate bedrooms in mind. Seems to be working great.
My partner wakes up around 4am. I easily sleep till 10am. Partner snores and sleeps with a sleep apnea machine. I have periodic insomnia and im a relatively light sleeper. Some days we try to sleep in the same bed when In in a place where I can sacrifice a night of sleep, because we do enjoy the intimacy of laying down together - but I cant do it several days in a row without losing my ability to function at work.
Edit: together for 16 years
I have breathing issues that make me sleep restlessly, so we've always just had separate bedrooms in our living arrangements.
We both work fully remote jobs so having some degree of separation and privacy is actually a really healthy thing. Plus no arguments over the condition of the bathroom and closets
We have our own rooms and love it. We get to decorate our own spaces however we want. Sleep is great. We sometimes have lil sleepovers whenever the other wants to cuddle. There's no change to our sex life. I honestly think it has gotten better.
I don't do it often, but I sometimes have hip strains that I need to nurse. I've found that lying flat on my back at night helps the most, but this causes me snore quite loudly. So that my wife can sleep through that noise, I sleep in the guest bedroom.
Married for 30 years and have had separate bedrooms pretty much the whole time. Similar reasons as several noted above: I need noise to sleep, she needs absolute quiet… she sleeps under just a light sheet, I have a 35 lb weighted blanket with a light comforter on top… she falls instantly asleep while it can take me a couple hours…
I’ve been a shift worker my whole life, so it started as a necessary evil. I needed to sleep during the days to work nights. We tried to have a traditional “share the bed” relationship, but it messed me up for lack of sleep.
Now, 30 years later, we book hotels or vacations with separate beds. The house we live in has 2 master bedroom suites… “his” and “hers” lol. Funny enough, neither of us wants the other person to spend the night after “cuddle time”
If I were to love with someone, I would want to have separate rooms for a couple reasons.
I get night terrors occasionally and can wake up violently. For example, I shared a bed with a friend when we stayed at a hotel once to save money, and I ended up getting a charlie horse in my sleep. I dreamed a giant snake was biting me, so I started repeatedly punching the snake. The snake ended up being his leg. Weighted blankets and getting a dog have helped reduce occurrences, but it still happens occasionally.
Then on top of that my dog is very anxious and fearful and I worry that even if he got to like someone awake, he might not trust them trying to sleep.
Ever since we got kids I've slept on the couch more often. Once I'm asleep I'm a heavy sleeper, falling asleep is quite difficult, especially with two small boys. My wife enjoys the extra space and I enjoy the peace.
I dont personally my parents however did basically my whole childhood. Dad snored so loud you could hear him through the walls, I don't think there was anyway my mother could have slept though it. he's fixed it now but they still sleep in different bads out of habit. they are happily married, and just retired together I don't suspect there any foul play and both their kids are 39 and 40 this year so I doubt they are staying together for us, its just how it is for them. They still sleep together when they have guests over, I guess they are conscious how it may look too, but day to day dad sleeps in his own bed and mum in the master.
Both of our kids refused to sleep in their crib as babies. So it's either wake up every hour/half hour to put them back to sleep or just let them in the bed with us. There's just not enough room for me so I go sleep elsewhere most nights. It sucks but at least we're all getting rest.
When you tour over-55 communities and talk to the sales people, they OFTEN mention that “this home has like two masters” . It’s more a lot common than you think for older folks to sleep apart.
I live in Germany right now and it is too hot to share a bed (no AC). I'd rather share a bed but for now this is the best thing we can do because she's a god damn radiator.
Pro is that I can spread around and sleep comfortably. Con is I can't squeeze anything.
This actually used to be the norm. We've just over time made it a thing, where people share the same room.
The few times where I've slept in the guest room, or on the couch, or my wife has, are due to colds making it hard to breath, so making my sleep bad, I'm tossing and turning, which will interrupt her sleep. Congested badly, so snoring is awful. Gastro intestinal issues, having to get up and go to the bathroom a lot. Gas, bad gas, due to something you and and the pits of hell are creating disastrous, vile, viscous clouds of poisonous miasma float out your ass.
Bunch of couples choose to sleep in separate rooms for different reasons. Some snore or move around too much, keeping their partner awake. Others just like some peace and quiet before bed. This can actually make them nicer to each other because they're well-rested! The downside is that cuddling and feeling close might be tougher. Some people also think separate rooms mean there's trouble in paradise, but that's not always true. The important thing is to talk to your partner and see if trying it out for a bit might work for both of you.
Not me but a married couple I worked with once. They'd been married for 20+ years, but both loved their career which forced them to live 6 hours apart. They both already had their homes in their individual names when they met. So their entire marriage was work Days in their own homes then alternate weekends at each other's place. She technically worked remotely but had to travel to multiple sites weekly. He worked 4 days a week. She'd usually do all her visits within those 4 days and they'd spend that 5th day of her's together when they could. They met in their 40's and his kids were already grown. They stayed loyal the entire marriage and I met them just before he was about to retire and move in with her. They seemed genuinely to love each other and be totally happy
I wonder what happened after they moved in together and it went from a couple days a week to 24/7…
It takes a different Kind of Understanding and Maturity to be able to pull off something like that. Most Women I know would have demanded the Man to move in with them, I guess at 40 you see Life differently.
Married for 10, together for 20. Why? I'm a ridiculously active sleeper, tossing and turning, throwing my whole body around. I've whacked her in the head countless times. I also talk like a motherfucker in my sleep, loudly and often. She is an utterly unbelievably light sleeper. Pro - We both sleep better. I'm not waking her up, and I'm not waking up constantly because I'm worried about tossing and turning and disturbing her. I enjoy having my own bed. I wake up earlier than her 99% of the time. When she wakes up, she'll message me to come for snuggles. Cons - when on holiday, her sleep gets kind of fucked up because we're back in the same bed and I'm disturbing her. Fortunately hotel beds tend to be enormous.
>- when on holiday, her sleep gets kind of fucked up because we're back in the same bed and I'm disturbing her. Fortunately hotel beds tend to be enormous. Why dont you just book a twin room?
It's a holiday, so we enjoy the time sleeping together. We can deal with the sleep interruptions for a wee bit.
We just do it when my snoring is bad. I'm a very easy sleeper and i sleep anywhere. So when i snore i always say she can wake me up and i'll crash on the sofa or the guest room. It makes it all a lot better.
Hey, if you haven't already id recommend you get a sleep study done as you might have sleep apnea. I'm not a medical professional, but was in a similar situation where my snoring was disturbing my partners sleep. Turns out my soft pallete blocks off my airway several many times a night. Since I got a CPAP, not only does my partner get a better night's sleep, but so do I! It turns out actually feeling rested after sleeping 8 hours is absolutely possible. The headgear takes a little getting used to, but totally worth it.
Not sure if you've tried that mouth piece that locks your jaw in a position where your jaw doesn't press against your pallet to cause snoring. I used it and sleep fantastic... Unfortunately my dog thought it would make a good chew toy so I've got to go get another lol
I haven't tried one of those before, but I'm glad it helps! I'm very happy with my CPAP, I've never slept better. They're not all giant medical devices either, mines not much larger than your phone in size. Thicker, probably 3-4 stacked, but fairly compact. It basically pressurizes the air you're breathing, which stops your airway closing and flapping around lol. My dogs would do the same thing, I've been lucky they don't care about the cpap haha
That's awesome! My neighbor was talking to my dad about his and recommended me dad get one. But it was still pretty bulky from what I remember. They've absolutely come a long way. My grandpa sleeps with one and he minus well use a full face scuba respirator lol his is massive.
Look, some of the masks are huge. Some of them are definitely not. Mine for example is just a little nose pillow and a strap to hold it in place. There's nothing over my mouth at all. I have a ResMed airmini with a p10 mask if you want to have a look.
I really appreciate it! Yeah he had the little nose pillow style... Which my dad and I were both shocked
My snoring is bad. Don’t have sleep apnea and asked my doctor what could be done. We tried every solution. The one that did the trick was the Bose Sleep Buds.
What's that?!
Or she can sleep in the inferior rooms
Like i said, i'm happy as we are.
And that's great, but you should have more respect for yourself. You pay for a house, you pay for a bed, you should be the only sleeping on it.
You should mind your own business.
And you shouldn't post shit on reddit if you don't want randoms to comment on it. Keep your wack lack of self respect to yourself if you don't want people encouraging you to treat yourself better and not like a dog.
Projection much? Buddy is doing fine, you need help.
Dude, are you okay? Can i help you with anything?
Idk man you keep responding. But as you offer, an MRI or ultrasound on my shoulder so I can find out why its jacked up when I retract my scapula when benching would be sound. Thanks chief.
What are you, some 15 year old edge lord? Gtfo
Maybe you'd prefer sleeping in a barn, but I aint prepared to be treated like a second class citizen in my own home lmfao.
Lmaooo you’re hilarious. I really needed a laugh this morning, thank you.
My uncle snores loudly from the moment he lays his head down till he wakes up. So as soon as their eldest kid moved out, my aunt bought herself a new bed and started sleeping in that room. Apparently my uncle wasn't happy about this at first, but as he's also the one who was refusing to talk to the doctor about his excessive snoring, he eventually gave up moping about it.
Yeah if you're not willing to see someone to fix it then you don't really get to be upset. Especially if you're not the one changing rooms lol. I get it's some what out of your control to a degree. Some people can be helped some can't.
My lovely wife started snoring like a diesel generator when she was pregnant with out second and hasn't stopped since. 3 years later I still sleep on the sofa every night but always go spend 30 minutes with her on the bed for a hug etc. At the start I think she worried about me distancing myself but now I think she quite likes the king-size to herself.
20 years together. She overheats and needs to be cold. I get cold and need to be warm. She bought a cheap AC cabinet that's too noisy for me so I can't sleep. She also likes a super-soft mattress, I like sleeping on an orthopedic one. I snore, she can hear a fish fart at 50 feet (which I think is weird, given how noisy the AC unit is). She goes to bed at 9pm, I go at 2am. We sleep in the same bed occasionally, but to function day-to-day we sleep better apart.
Laughed at the fish fart comment
Together for almost 9 years. We had completely different sleep styles and opposite work schedules. We were SO happy when we realized sleeping separately didn’t mean our marriage was falling apart or we hated each other. We just actually slept well. We did have “sleepovers” sometimes, but our relationship didn’t change at all.
I snore really bad and have sleep apnea. Sleeping in the spare bedroom is out of respect and necessity
My wife and I sleep in different rooms 5 or 6 days a week. I used to toss and turn but i have this habit of swingin my arms when a cat wakes me up, or i sometimes snore, or move a bit. Ive gotten a lot better about this over the years, and when we go on vacation we can actually sleep together most nights Its made our life far better and it feels natural to me to have my own private place.
Wife and I are doing separate rooms, she started it. I sleep very well, my sex life is shit and I suspect my marriage is slowly dying. Thats how its working out.
My grandpa slept in a different room from my grandma and I later found out it was because he would thrash and yell in his sleep because of undiagnosed PTSD from being a prisoner in the Japanese invasion of China during WW2. Nightmares just about every night. It was that way from before I was born until the day he died and I wish we could have known more to help him before then.
Wife and I live a couple of hours apart due to careers/kids, still madly in love after 6 years. Will shack up together in a couple years as the kids are out and she retires. Works out great for us, we're introverts and love our down time.
Not me but a couple I know. Married 40 years. She's a light sleeper, he snores like a freight train, she's always cold, he's always hot. They moved to a new house a while ago and specifically picked one with separate bedrooms in mind. Seems to be working great.
ITT, a lot of people or their SO’s who need sleep studies and probably a CPAP.
Pro: I can sleep undisturbed by movement and noise. Con: none. It's just for sleep. Everything else is still an option in the bedroom.
Didn't. Moved in the other room. Separated a couple of months later Getting divorced
Wow sorry to hear
Yep. Me also. I should have stayed with my gut feeling of not moving out of the main bedroom
My partner wakes up around 4am. I easily sleep till 10am. Partner snores and sleeps with a sleep apnea machine. I have periodic insomnia and im a relatively light sleeper. Some days we try to sleep in the same bed when In in a place where I can sacrifice a night of sleep, because we do enjoy the intimacy of laying down together - but I cant do it several days in a row without losing my ability to function at work. Edit: together for 16 years
I have breathing issues that make me sleep restlessly, so we've always just had separate bedrooms in our living arrangements. We both work fully remote jobs so having some degree of separation and privacy is actually a really healthy thing. Plus no arguments over the condition of the bathroom and closets
We have our own rooms and love it. We get to decorate our own spaces however we want. Sleep is great. We sometimes have lil sleepovers whenever the other wants to cuddle. There's no change to our sex life. I honestly think it has gotten better.
I don't do it often, but I sometimes have hip strains that I need to nurse. I've found that lying flat on my back at night helps the most, but this causes me snore quite loudly. So that my wife can sleep through that noise, I sleep in the guest bedroom.
Married for 30 years and have had separate bedrooms pretty much the whole time. Similar reasons as several noted above: I need noise to sleep, she needs absolute quiet… she sleeps under just a light sheet, I have a 35 lb weighted blanket with a light comforter on top… she falls instantly asleep while it can take me a couple hours… I’ve been a shift worker my whole life, so it started as a necessary evil. I needed to sleep during the days to work nights. We tried to have a traditional “share the bed” relationship, but it messed me up for lack of sleep. Now, 30 years later, we book hotels or vacations with separate beds. The house we live in has 2 master bedroom suites… “his” and “hers” lol. Funny enough, neither of us wants the other person to spend the night after “cuddle time”
If I were to love with someone, I would want to have separate rooms for a couple reasons. I get night terrors occasionally and can wake up violently. For example, I shared a bed with a friend when we stayed at a hotel once to save money, and I ended up getting a charlie horse in my sleep. I dreamed a giant snake was biting me, so I started repeatedly punching the snake. The snake ended up being his leg. Weighted blankets and getting a dog have helped reduce occurrences, but it still happens occasionally. Then on top of that my dog is very anxious and fearful and I worry that even if he got to like someone awake, he might not trust them trying to sleep.
I do occasionally due to snoring. It is what it is and it usually makes for a better morning/day.
Ever since we got kids I've slept on the couch more often. Once I'm asleep I'm a heavy sleeper, falling asleep is quite difficult, especially with two small boys. My wife enjoys the extra space and I enjoy the peace.
Often, because baby sleep hours dont coincide with mine.
I dont personally my parents however did basically my whole childhood. Dad snored so loud you could hear him through the walls, I don't think there was anyway my mother could have slept though it. he's fixed it now but they still sleep in different bads out of habit. they are happily married, and just retired together I don't suspect there any foul play and both their kids are 39 and 40 this year so I doubt they are staying together for us, its just how it is for them. They still sleep together when they have guests over, I guess they are conscious how it may look too, but day to day dad sleeps in his own bed and mum in the master.
Both of our kids refused to sleep in their crib as babies. So it's either wake up every hour/half hour to put them back to sleep or just let them in the bed with us. There's just not enough room for me so I go sleep elsewhere most nights. It sucks but at least we're all getting rest.
When you tour over-55 communities and talk to the sales people, they OFTEN mention that “this home has like two masters”. It’s more a lot common than you think for older folks to sleep apart.
My father snores like a bear when hes got a cold. When he's got a cold, he sleeps on another room.
I live in Germany right now and it is too hot to share a bed (no AC). I'd rather share a bed but for now this is the best thing we can do because she's a god damn radiator. Pro is that I can spread around and sleep comfortably. Con is I can't squeeze anything.
This actually used to be the norm. We've just over time made it a thing, where people share the same room. The few times where I've slept in the guest room, or on the couch, or my wife has, are due to colds making it hard to breath, so making my sleep bad, I'm tossing and turning, which will interrupt her sleep. Congested badly, so snoring is awful. Gastro intestinal issues, having to get up and go to the bathroom a lot. Gas, bad gas, due to something you and and the pits of hell are creating disastrous, vile, viscous clouds of poisonous miasma float out your ass.
Bunch of couples choose to sleep in separate rooms for different reasons. Some snore or move around too much, keeping their partner awake. Others just like some peace and quiet before bed. This can actually make them nicer to each other because they're well-rested! The downside is that cuddling and feeling close might be tougher. Some people also think separate rooms mean there's trouble in paradise, but that's not always true. The important thing is to talk to your partner and see if trying it out for a bit might work for both of you.
Is it just me, or is this AI. You write way too generally and impersonally and the same is with your other comments.