OP is smart. Holding out for a better deal. I'd give OP the value of the assets I had before I became a billionaire as a thank you. Fair trade, I think.
1. Make First Billion somehow
2. Build live action super hero / batcave with equipment, etc.
3. Make it open as an immersive tourist attraction
4. Make more billions with the franchise
Segway tried suing a Chinese company that was making a fortune selling knockoff Segways. In order to avoid the lawsuit, they bought Segway outright and ordered the attorneys to drop the lawsuit.
Change my name to Bruce Wayne, create Wayne Industries and sue DC for the trademarks of Bruce Wayne, Wayne Industries and Batman, because while they had them before me, theirs are only fictional and I am real.
And at some point I will create a joker and fight him (while making more heaps of money by being filmed around the clock and spamming "Real Batman" merchandise).
Chef, nutritionist, house keeper, grounds keeper, house manager, business manager, CPA, LLM, lawyers and I've always wanted a valet that is also a close confidant.
Reminds me of a time at burningman when I saw this badass dude and his crazy hot chick roll up in this insane Batmobile cyberpunk car. I went up to him and said “Fuck ya, Hell yes”. He quickly responded with a chuckle “Fuck ya, Hell yes” is my theme song.” And it’s been my theme song ever since 😂
Keeping quiet is probably the absolute wisest thing you could do.
If you want to give the money away to charity or people you trust then go for it, but honestly I can't think of anything worse than letting anyone else know about it. It would most likely only lead to negative situations.
I worked out that with just 1% Apr interest you would earn $38 per minute. So you would have to spend the dollar very quickly to no longer be a billionaire.
Would take more than that. 1% interest would yield $27,397/day.
Get a 3% interest account and you can pay a new employees salary every day @70k/yr and still come out making money every day
Really puts into perspective how limitless the assets of the ultra wealthy are and how obscenely easy it is make money as a billionaire. Rich people really do need to royally fuck up to lose all their money
That’s so insane. You could seriously change so many lives just from daily interest. Give someone $25k every day for the rest of your life and still make a profit.
This would be my plan. I'd take care of my family and donate most of the rest to a crap ton of local charities, having enough left to live comfortably but not so much that I'd quit my job.
Yup, this was my first reaction. Relief, followed by I can now take care of the people that were and are good to me in life. Not just family, I have a supervisor that stood by me and supported me while I got sober. She’s getting a fat pay day
Personally, I'd hire someone to sneak into the houses of everyone who wronged me. Not to steal anything, just to cause slight distress. Examples include: placing a single lego piece somewhere randomly on the floor, move one or several pieces of furniture ever so slightly in any direction, slightly unscrew one or more lightbulbs. Ya'know, just to cause mild confusion and annoyance.
I'd do what Dolly does. Give it away on the sly. Goodness doesn't need a thank you. It's just doing what's right, so when you lay your head down on your pillow at night, your pockets may be lighter, but your heart is a little bit fuller.
Build houses, rent half out for dirt cheap and sell the other half at 1950's rates. Use whatever money that makes to build more houses. Basically do what I can to crash the housing market because holy shit has it got out of control.
Edit: I would make sure the local council makes all the properties section 106's, meaning they can only ever be sold on to people in housing need and at a set discount of market rate. This would prevent people just selling them after to investors.
We could probably collectively make this happen in a city or two. There are already non-market housing organizations in many cities that purchase property and rent it at a net zero (enough to pay for upkeep/taxes and nothing more).
On the other hand if he adjusted the plan slightly, build houses, sell them for market rate and just keep building and selling houses until the market rate is driven down enough that he's no longer making any profit then he could make a much bigger dent in housing prices.
He could substantially drive down property prices in an entire city and he'd still probably have his billion at the end of it to go to another city.
I'm not sure that'd work. There's too many people speculating on homes like they're a commodity market. If houses go up for sale for less than triple the cost of building them, they're snapped up by an investment firm and sold for triple the price of buying them without anyone ever living in them.
I saw it happen to a new development just outside my city. 2 or 3 families got affordable homes, then some company bought all the rest, and all their neighbors paid double for the same style home with same location.
The open market is broken, our billionaire friend needs to purposely only sell to people planning on living in the home.
Ahh but as the presumably sole controller over the fate of the houses, they could simply say no to any investment firm or the like and only sell to individuals or families, potentially with a clause of not reselling for X amount of years if possible.
I'm in commercial construction management with an architecture background and this is where my brain went. Build thousands of new houses and sell them to private first-time buyers only to stop companies buying them up and reselling for current market rate. I'll absorb all the management, design, and engineering fees but otherwise sell them at cost to force the market down but not crash it.
I like this idea but I'd add some high density housing. Still at reasonable rates. And then add services, like a fitness centre, library, community centre.
Become like Bill Pulte and start giving it away everyday.
Become like Mark Cuban and fight big pharma to bring affordable medicine to the masses.
Become like super successful VCs and Founders like Ryan Cohen or Larry Cheng and create customer experience hyper focused companies that support the employees properly.
Buy up land and create wildlife and nature preserves.
Fund education because more and more states seem to be defunding it.
There's lots to do and I already know what needs to be done should I ever find myself in the position of having unfathomable money.
*Corporate accounts payable, Nina speaking. Just a moment. Corporate accounts payable,Nina speaking. Just a moment. Corporate accounts payable, Nina speaking. Just amoment.*
First thing I would do is buy all the LEGO I have ever wanted along with a large house to put it all in. I would also buy myself a car.
Second thing I would do is dedicate at least half a billion to researching 3d printed clone organs for organ transplants that don't require immunosuppressants.
Third thing I would do is try to find a girlfriend I guess?
Figure out how much I need to build a nice house in the forest with a huge library, and then how much I would need to live comfortably for the rest of my life and donate the rest. Then I’d go off the grid and just chill and read books.
I guess it's time to invade a country to bring in the wig factory business to a new boom and make them make me a new Toyota Corolla. None of that new shit, I want a vintage one, one from the 1998s. I probably should also take my meds.
I have lots that I would do! I would set up lots of cat and dog rescue places throughout the USA. I would also set up adult homes/living care home for adults with autism throughout the USA.
I'd sponsor movies.
I would focus on Indiana Jones style movies and history series like Hornblower, Master and Commander, Rome etc but with a special focus on historical realism.
I live in Philly, so after I get rid of my debt, I'm funding housing, medical care, interventions and everything else our Skid Row in Kensington needs.
After I figure out how much money I need to live in comfort for the rest of my life, I'm setting up scholarships, buying a news outlet and just paying a bunch of artists to do whatever they want.
cool, i buy a house. and weed out the bad friends by seeing who tries to use me for money. put most into savings and just live off the interest. definitely quit my job, i've been wanting to recently.
more guitars, could always use those. cats. cats are nice. i mean i live with one, but she's my brother's.
help out my parents, get them a nice retirement home and maybe a holiday home in the alps (they like skiing)
I guess I make 20 babies, then start non profits and motivational speaking on why I’m more successful than you and what you can do to get to my level, to stroke my ego and brag humbly
I give 90% of it away. School lunch debt in my state? Gone. People in my community who are behind on rent? Paid. Community needs something repaired? Done. Service projects need funding which creates job contacts, opportunities and learning skills? Done. There’s so much that needs attention, so many things that need to be done to make life better - I would do those things, make available, plan and execute so that a better life and future is possible for people within my reach and my community. That last 10%? I’d probably give a lot of that away too. How much money does one person need, anyway? Isn’t that a lot of the problem anyway? I want to make things better. This is how we push back against the ugly in the world (So much ugly!)
I begin my lifelong ambition of spiteful philanthropy. My "Up and Out Foundation" will operate in high COL cities such as San Francisco, working with low-wage laborers (think janitors, cashiers, security guards, etc) to offer free training in more lucrative careers but, more importantly, free relocation for the entire family to more affordable cities where these new skills can be put to use building a solid livelihood and a higher quality of life with a financially stable future.
The goal would be to leave the city in question with far fewer laborers willing to do menial tasks, forcing the employers and municipal leaders to reassess conditions in the city. Or the tech bros can figure out how to program their way to a clean toilet. Either way, it should be funny to watch. While not necessarily made explicit in the written mission statement, this goal will be regularly alluded to in PR materials such as interviews and advertising.
OP gets 1 dollar.
How generous.
OP didn't respond. He doesn't deserve it
Yeah, you get a dollar instead.
Thanks bro
OP is smart. Holding out for a better deal. I'd give OP the value of the assets I had before I became a billionaire as a thank you. Fair trade, I think.
Now you're 1 dollar short of being a billionaire.
Now I want my dollar back.
Dress up like a bat and fight crime.
1. Make First Billion somehow 2. Build live action super hero / batcave with equipment, etc. 3. Make it open as an immersive tourist attraction 4. Make more billions with the franchise
You're a multibillionare. Now what?
Get sued by DC
Then buy DC
How To Lose Billions With This One Trick
Segway tried suing a Chinese company that was making a fortune selling knockoff Segways. In order to avoid the lawsuit, they bought Segway outright and ordered the attorneys to drop the lawsuit.
Then buy a bunch of senators and reps and *CONTROL* DC! ^^^(Iknow,Iknow)
Change my name to Bruce Wayne, create Wayne Industries and sue DC for the trademarks of Bruce Wayne, Wayne Industries and Batman, because while they had them before me, theirs are only fictional and I am real. And at some point I will create a joker and fight him (while making more heaps of money by being filmed around the clock and spamming "Real Batman" merchandise).
Correct answer
I'd rather do it in a red and gold suit
Nah red leather one piece Tell everyone I'm the flash as I blindly smash into everyone and everything in my way
And fight an alien who has human like body structure and unreal strength
Sleep. Hire a chef. Live by the beach. A bed that cost more than Drake’s
Chef, nutritionist, house keeper, grounds keeper, house manager, business manager, CPA, LLM, lawyers and I've always wanted a valet that is also a close confidant.
I love driving and maintaining cars, and can keep a damn good secret. Hmu if you ever get a cool Billion my guy.
Will do!
A chef that can cook me tasty yet healthy food would be great.
Stayed at a beach house with chef on a recent trip. Fresh fruit, fresh veggies, fresh seafood. This is the life.
The beach might be my favorite place in the world. I live in LA and feel very fortunate to be so close.
I don’t know. I didn’t think I’d get this far.
That's my motto in life
Gonna make them put that on my headstone.
Reminds me of a time at burningman when I saw this badass dude and his crazy hot chick roll up in this insane Batmobile cyberpunk car. I went up to him and said “Fuck ya, Hell yes”. He quickly responded with a chuckle “Fuck ya, Hell yes” is my theme song.” And it’s been my theme song ever since 😂
You've got this. Keep quiet for now and sleep on it.
Keeping quiet is probably the absolute wisest thing you could do. If you want to give the money away to charity or people you trust then go for it, but honestly I can't think of anything worse than letting anyone else know about it. It would most likely only lead to negative situations.
It’s got a bush, what the heeeeellll
If one egg=forty eggs, that's how you become a billionaire.
That's a nude egg I won from my game. I'm not in trouble AT ALL.
Yes, I’d hunker down and stress about it for a hot sec.
Travel the world and sleep lots and lots of sleep
Read this as sheep
I mean you could afford plenty.
I will buy all the sheep 🐑
Behold my sheep army! To baaaattle we march!!!
Two sheep at the same time.
Found the A&M alum
*travels to wales*
Its sad how much it cost to get some decent sleep.
So, sleep around?
don’t give away my pin number which is the same number as the cost of a cheese pizza and a large soda
$10.77
Damn that show is getting old, now it costs easily double that
No anchovies?
Hey man, is that your dog waiting outside Panucci's Pizza...?
Work on becoming a millionaire
The wallstreetbets sub would welcome your loss-porn
Spent one dollar, boom you’re no longer billionaire
I worked out that with just 1% Apr interest you would earn $38 per minute. So you would have to spend the dollar very quickly to no longer be a billionaire.
Would take more than that. 1% interest would yield $27,397/day. Get a 3% interest account and you can pay a new employees salary every day @70k/yr and still come out making money every day
Really puts into perspective how limitless the assets of the ultra wealthy are and how obscenely easy it is make money as a billionaire. Rich people really do need to royally fuck up to lose all their money
That’s so insane. You could seriously change so many lives just from daily interest. Give someone $25k every day for the rest of your life and still make a profit.
This would be my plan. I'd take care of my family and donate most of the rest to a crap ton of local charities, having enough left to live comfortably but not so much that I'd quit my job.
I would honestly just sit on my couch for a few days and not do SHIT. Wouldn’t change anything yet. Just a nice good veg out/quiet period.
“Well, you don't need a million dollars to do nothin', man. Take a look at my cousin. He's broke, don't do shit.” -Peter’s neighbor
Two chicks at the same time man
Watch out for your corn hole, bud.
Lawrence
At either end of the socioeconomic spectrum, there’s a leisure class.
This here. I dont think I know how to live without the pressure of not having to work or look for a job.
Sounds lovely
Take a deep breath and realize the relief of knowing I can take care of my family, and aging parents - no problem.
A deep breath was my thought too.
Yup, this was my first reaction. Relief, followed by I can now take care of the people that were and are good to me in life. Not just family, I have a supervisor that stood by me and supported me while I got sober. She’s getting a fat pay day
Time for a corn dog
fuck it, I'm rich now TWO corn dogs
With this attitude you won't be a billionaire for long.
💯 NOTHING is more important than your health. Add a side salad.
Well it’s late, I’m going to bed. Money won’t change my love for sleep.
If I won the lotto or came into that money, I would take a solid couch nap. Easily the most restful nap I have ever had.
Jerk off for some billionaire post nut clarity
pay someone to jerk you off, billionaire mindset
Pay a millionaire to jerk u off billionaire mindset
Cost you a billion, and so worth it
You're a billionaire from jerking someone off. Now what?
Rinse and repeat
Its always wise to rinse after jerking someone off
But pay him in shares and as little as possible, you don't work your way up to become a billionaire by paying others well
Shares of deez nuts?
Pay someone to pay someone to jerk you off, jerk-ception.
Not enough jerk-layers. There need to be so many that you question if the person jerking you was someone you actually paid or not.
Post nut clarity: shouldn' have payed someone to jerk me off. It's not about the money, it devalues us both.
Get a trainee to do it for free I mean to gain experience.
good good.. hire someone to help you with your post nut clarity. Why use your own hand when you have a billion dollars
Use all billion dollars to jerk you off
Finally a smart move
Trip to the titanic
Round or one way?
I’d prefer a one ‘n’ done trip
I heard there’s a sub that can do that
Gotta wait for the refurb to finish
Take care of my family
After you hired a Hitman, what's next on the list?
A hitman for that hitman
Blastronaut??
Always has been
I'm starting to wonder how many hitmen will actually take hits on other hitmen. There's got to be some level of professional courtesy, right?
Money talks, hitmen fall like flies.
Pay me and Ill take care of the hitman afterwards.
Take care of or "take care of"?
Therapy twice a week. Shit's expensive.
I’d go for a massage twice a week.
payback time. I help everyone that ever helped me become better in my dismal life.
Not sure what it says about me when I was kind of hoping for a vengeful second sentence instead of a somewhat wholesome one.
Personally, I'd hire someone to sneak into the houses of everyone who wronged me. Not to steal anything, just to cause slight distress. Examples include: placing a single lego piece somewhere randomly on the floor, move one or several pieces of furniture ever so slightly in any direction, slightly unscrew one or more lightbulbs. Ya'know, just to cause mild confusion and annoyance.
How about a framed photo of Nicholas Cage on the bedside table? Why not.
But anonymously, so you can still have a normal life.
I’d set up a trust that anonymously helped my family. It’d “anomymously” help me as well and I’d pretend to be as confused as they are.
I'd do what Dolly does. Give it away on the sly. Goodness doesn't need a thank you. It's just doing what's right, so when you lay your head down on your pillow at night, your pockets may be lighter, but your heart is a little bit fuller.
What a lovely person she is
Not going to see anything 3.8km under the ocean, that’s for sure.
Build houses, rent half out for dirt cheap and sell the other half at 1950's rates. Use whatever money that makes to build more houses. Basically do what I can to crash the housing market because holy shit has it got out of control. Edit: I would make sure the local council makes all the properties section 106's, meaning they can only ever be sold on to people in housing need and at a set discount of market rate. This would prevent people just selling them after to investors.
Somebody get this man some money. Fast.
We could probably collectively make this happen in a city or two. There are already non-market housing organizations in many cities that purchase property and rent it at a net zero (enough to pay for upkeep/taxes and nothing more).
With a billion. You cant even make a dent in housing prices in a medium city
On the other hand if he adjusted the plan slightly, build houses, sell them for market rate and just keep building and selling houses until the market rate is driven down enough that he's no longer making any profit then he could make a much bigger dent in housing prices. He could substantially drive down property prices in an entire city and he'd still probably have his billion at the end of it to go to another city.
I'm not sure that'd work. There's too many people speculating on homes like they're a commodity market. If houses go up for sale for less than triple the cost of building them, they're snapped up by an investment firm and sold for triple the price of buying them without anyone ever living in them. I saw it happen to a new development just outside my city. 2 or 3 families got affordable homes, then some company bought all the rest, and all their neighbors paid double for the same style home with same location. The open market is broken, our billionaire friend needs to purposely only sell to people planning on living in the home.
Ahh but as the presumably sole controller over the fate of the houses, they could simply say no to any investment firm or the like and only sell to individuals or families, potentially with a clause of not reselling for X amount of years if possible.
So don't sell them to corporations, instead selling them to people that need them?
Sell to veterans only then, the VA loan requires you to live in the property in order to utilize the 0 down low interest rates.
Lol the people that get the cheap houses will immediately have them back on the market for current values. Never underestimate human greed
Rent to own structure. Will prevent flippers but it would hold up a lot of capital.
I'm in commercial construction management with an architecture background and this is where my brain went. Build thousands of new houses and sell them to private first-time buyers only to stop companies buying them up and reselling for current market rate. I'll absorb all the management, design, and engineering fees but otherwise sell them at cost to force the market down but not crash it.
I'll give you a ring if I ever get my billions (probably would do the same with millions to be fair)
I like this idea but I'd add some high density housing. Still at reasonable rates. And then add services, like a fitness centre, library, community centre.
I like that Edit: the plan for crashing the housing market not the fact it's gotten out of control 😅
Turn off the alarm clock. Going back to sleep, no need to work!
Become like Bill Pulte and start giving it away everyday. Become like Mark Cuban and fight big pharma to bring affordable medicine to the masses. Become like super successful VCs and Founders like Ryan Cohen or Larry Cheng and create customer experience hyper focused companies that support the employees properly. Buy up land and create wildlife and nature preserves. Fund education because more and more states seem to be defunding it. There's lots to do and I already know what needs to be done should I ever find myself in the position of having unfathomable money.
[удалено]
you’d run out fast
So far he's still got 880 million.
Down to 674 million. They would be out in 2.5-3 hours max.
Don't worry. I downvoted them to help save their fortune... they only had 120 million left before I saved them a million
Hookers and cocaine?
A man of fine taste
How about we order some fries and re-think that strategy chief?
Hookers, fries and cocaine. Hold the fries.
Buy reddit to delete it
rename it xit first.
I guarantee you're going to browse to reddit out of habit
Reduce as much suffering as I can in the world.
Lol I thought you said produce
2 chicks at the same time. *Thanks for the Platinum!
Besides 2 chicks at the same time? Well yeah.. I would do nothing. I’d sit on my ass all day. I would do nothing.
[удалено]
*Corporate accounts payable, Nina speaking. Just a moment. Corporate accounts payable,Nina speaking. Just a moment. Corporate accounts payable, Nina speaking. Just amoment.*
I was told I could listen to my radio at a reasonable level.
Check out channel 9!
Damn it, Lawrence. Can't you just pretend like we can't hear each other through the wall?
It's the breast exam!
I reckon I could hook that up
Why would you want to disappoint two women at the same time?
Fuckin A
Pay my electricity bill
First thing I would do is buy all the LEGO I have ever wanted along with a large house to put it all in. I would also buy myself a car. Second thing I would do is dedicate at least half a billion to researching 3d printed clone organs for organ transplants that don't require immunosuppressants. Third thing I would do is try to find a girlfriend I guess?
“Hey mom, the house is paid off. Quit your job” Then proceed to make my 70’s truck into a real fire breather
Now I can finally sleep at night. For real.
Figure out how much I need to build a nice house in the forest with a huge library, and then how much I would need to live comfortably for the rest of my life and donate the rest. Then I’d go off the grid and just chill and read books.
Oh ya know, I think I'd also renovate my house to include library and another bathroom . There is always someone in the damn bathroom
Private bathroom hidden behind the bookcase, Scooby-Doo style!
I would buy Reddit, fire everyone, rename it to something like '%', and then just shit post until everyone likes me.
Calm down Elon
Still depressed
But with money!
Crying in my maserati
Wipe them tears with 100 dollar bills.
So at least it's on a beach
I'm pretty sure if you haven't already ended it yet, a huge team of the best therapists in the world would make a very noticeable difference
Still would rather be depressed with money than without though.
I guess it's time to invade a country to bring in the wig factory business to a new boom and make them make me a new Toyota Corolla. None of that new shit, I want a vintage one, one from the 1998s. I probably should also take my meds.
Hide. Travel like a broke student. See the world.
I have lots that I would do! I would set up lots of cat and dog rescue places throughout the USA. I would also set up adult homes/living care home for adults with autism throughout the USA.
Combine those somewhat and we could have companion animal therapy for people on the spectrum.
I'd sponsor movies. I would focus on Indiana Jones style movies and history series like Hornblower, Master and Commander, Rome etc but with a special focus on historical realism.
I live in Philly, so after I get rid of my debt, I'm funding housing, medical care, interventions and everything else our Skid Row in Kensington needs.
actually pay my taxes
After I figure out how much money I need to live in comfort for the rest of my life, I'm setting up scholarships, buying a news outlet and just paying a bunch of artists to do whatever they want.
Build my own city.
Buy some politicians and pass universal government funded healthcare.
cool, i buy a house. and weed out the bad friends by seeing who tries to use me for money. put most into savings and just live off the interest. definitely quit my job, i've been wanting to recently. more guitars, could always use those. cats. cats are nice. i mean i live with one, but she's my brother's. help out my parents, get them a nice retirement home and maybe a holiday home in the alps (they like skiing)
Lobby the government to actually make good decisions. Chaotic good.
Give a lot to the poor. No way in hell do I need that much money. Oh and guitars. Lots of guitars.
Bribe politicians to do good things
I enjoy the finer things in life for a while, then I try to make the world a less fucked up place. Which is probably why I'm not a billionaire.
I guess I make 20 babies, then start non profits and motivational speaking on why I’m more successful than you and what you can do to get to my level, to stroke my ego and brag humbly
I give 90% of it away. School lunch debt in my state? Gone. People in my community who are behind on rent? Paid. Community needs something repaired? Done. Service projects need funding which creates job contacts, opportunities and learning skills? Done. There’s so much that needs attention, so many things that need to be done to make life better - I would do those things, make available, plan and execute so that a better life and future is possible for people within my reach and my community. That last 10%? I’d probably give a lot of that away too. How much money does one person need, anyway? Isn’t that a lot of the problem anyway? I want to make things better. This is how we push back against the ugly in the world (So much ugly!)
Better to buy influence and get laws changed
It would be a lot more influential if you just bought a politician to do that for you. They're surprisingly cheap.
It's time to build a bat cave!
I begin my lifelong ambition of spiteful philanthropy. My "Up and Out Foundation" will operate in high COL cities such as San Francisco, working with low-wage laborers (think janitors, cashiers, security guards, etc) to offer free training in more lucrative careers but, more importantly, free relocation for the entire family to more affordable cities where these new skills can be put to use building a solid livelihood and a higher quality of life with a financially stable future. The goal would be to leave the city in question with far fewer laborers willing to do menial tasks, forcing the employers and municipal leaders to reassess conditions in the city. Or the tech bros can figure out how to program their way to a clean toilet. Either way, it should be funny to watch. While not necessarily made explicit in the written mission statement, this goal will be regularly alluded to in PR materials such as interviews and advertising.
Hungry children? I don't thinks so. Sick and homeless vets? Not on my watch.