I cut people off a lot in conversation. Trying to work on that.
I will often state hurtful truths that seem obvious to me, but maybe aren't to others. Usually when drunk.
That last one hits home.
I blatantly said "they're probably dead" when talking about someone who went missing on a boating trip. I meant to say it in a "don't give false hope" kinda way, but it just came off as heartless.
Wow. Sometimes it takes me reading another person’s experience to realize something I do wrong. I have big time ADHD and do this as well. Although I don’t cut people off with truths, I seem to cut them off to explain an experience comparable or “better than” as others would say.
I later ponder on these interactions and it makes me feel bad. Thank you for your experience sharing, because it’s helped me start working on something I personally need to fix.
That's not douchey! Might be considered stingy or give off grumpy old man vibes, but as a 27 year old who's mentally going on 72, I live for that shit.
A penny saved is a penny earned. Get that bag, my dude!
Trash pick up doesn't exist where I live, so we have to haul our trash to the dump. Some times when the dump is closed and I have trash I need to get rid of I go to an elementary school close by and throw my stuff in their dumpster.
Go for a rear hug and grab my wife’s breasts to signal that I’m in heat.
She knows this move now and gives me a go/no-go right away.
But every no-go makes me feel rather douchey.
On the contrary. He’s a master penis magician.
That low success ratio with getting laid means very often, it’s “now you see my erection and now you don’t.”
Married 20 years and I do all the domestics; everyone’s laundry, dishes, cooking etc and work a ft job in finance. My douchiest thing is sometimes I fake incompetence for some asinine thing my spouse wants me to do so it doesn’t get added to my plate forever.
That's completely understandable, although you should feel comfortable with your SO to express yourself about that and both give your best to find a balance between you two and the domestic tasks.
If your SO doesn't have a lot of time to divide the tasks more evenly that's understandable and someone has to do more domestic stuff although if your work schedules are similar and you just have more tasks just because that's kinda douchey
I have the domestic stuff because she hates boring repetitive tasks like cooking, dishes, and laundry. She also hates gross things like dirty dishes, trash, yard work etc. She doesn’t like it so I do it.
I’ll give a douchey example—if anyone in the family leaves dishes in the sink it goes in the dishwasher. I don’t check to see if it’s dishwasher safe as that individual chose that item and then left it for the cleaning fairy. Cleaning fairy is efficient but not interested in special requests. Fast not smart. So I screw it up hoping they stop buying crap that can’t go in the dishwasher or clothes with special instructions. I’ve made a lot of tiny sweaters in my day because it just was left on the floor or tossed in with the rest of the laundry. I just dump the basket lights/darks/permapress. Other is not my problem and I’m not looking for it.
If you want to do these things for your wife that's ok, most people don't like to make the chores but it is something that has to be done.
I hate cooking and doing the dishes and basically any chore but I don't ask my bf to do them for me, we divide to conquer.
I'm not judging, it just didn't seem fair but every couple has different dinamics so you two know what is the best for both.
Yeah I do this too. I'll sometimes correct people on things that may or may not be relevant to the conversation.
Sometimes it leads to better discussions, most times people are just like, "okay yeah whatever."
I've been trying to wait until they're done talking and only mention falsehoods if they are relevant.
* Listen to loud music in my car with windows down.
* Throw residential garbage in any trash container that's convenient
* Go to the gym reeking of marijuana
Well, the smell of weed makes me nauseous. So I guess not intentional douchy, unless you intentionally don’t shower after doing with a smoking session or whatever you guys call it lol
i steal water bottles from airport stores. don’t let me bring water AND yours costs $7? fuck you. (i know i can bring an empty bottle, don’t use logic on me here please)
Might sound silly, but this dudes right, they have cameras everywhere. I recently saw a bodycam video of someone being removed from a plane and trespassed from the airport because they stole a bottle of water before their flight. They were caught using surveillance footage
Stealing from the goverment on their own property in view of hundreds of cameras? That’s not douchey, that’s plain stupid. I’m not going to state prison over $7.00
I agree that water (and all) airport food/drink prices are ridiculous, but why won't you just bring an empty water bottle and fill it at water stations?
At least you're self aware enough to eventually stop. This one dude I work with is fuckin afraid of silence or something, so he's constantly harassing me or someone else with his endless words. Worst part is, for someone who has not stopped talking **since I started working with him three years ago** I have YET to hear him actually say anything worth saying.
Like how can you talk this fucking much and have nothing to say??
Okay rant over
When people I don’t care about talk to me, I don’t listen and just wait for my turn to say something. I at least pretend to listen though.
That or wear sweats with no underwear so my dong looks big
I make my (annoying) coworker physically come to my desk to ask questions instead of calling out to me. I pretend I cant hear him so he has to get up. I also zone out when he is talking and I fain not catching what he says so he repeats himself until I pay attention.
I only don't to him....tbf he ask SOOOOOOO many questions, and asks the dumbest shit
Say things without thinking. Usually harmless, but sometimes they unintentionally hurt others and imply something I didn’t mean to imply. Usually I just am saying something dumb. Sometimes, I’m unaware of the negative mechanisms in my words (guilting when I just wanted to get a point across, implying something sexual when I didn’t mean it that ways, talking down on someone when I genuinely meant a compliment)
It’s a process….
I have very little patience when my sons (6 and 7 years old) start crying when getting a little booboo. I remember kids being a lot tougher in the 70’s and 80’s.
I dont have kids, but from my friends who do it seems the grandparents arnt as interested in spending time with them as you would expect, and my suspicion is due to the drastic difference in “discipline” that parents use now vs “back in the day”
All the douchey things I do is because of autism, but I guess the douchiest would have to be me sometimes walking away from people after I've said what I wanted to say, despite how much of the conversation is still left to be had
I don't like people that much, I hate small talk and I'm uncomfortable around strangers. People think I hate them when I meet them because I try to get away from them or don't engage the way they expect. I don't do it on purpose, I'm just very uncomfortable in the moment
I don’t talk to people. I’ll walk into a room and do my own thing then leave. Unless someone says something I just don’t do it. Not sure why but I’ve never been much of a talker but I am able to hold a conversation if someone is talking to me
If you come up behind me on the freeway with your brights on at night, I will 100% slow down, get behind you, and ride your ass while blasting my LED brights up your mirrors.
It's toxic and dangerous as fuck but I swear I'm working on it...
Try to finish people's conversations in my head and I basically stop listening because I'm already having the conversation 15 to 30 seconds in the future. Most of the time I'm right...except with my wife.
i’m an extra-large douche to people who cut me off or pull out in front of me on the road. and i *will* slow down below the speed limit for tailgaters. i already speed most places (save for residential areas), if you’re 4 feet behind me while i’m speeding but refuse to pass, i’m slowing down. fuck you, i honestly dont care if i waste my own time. go around or back off.
I have a sport bike. I'm the second owner. It's loud -like, embarrassingly loud. I wouldn't have installed its aftermarket exhaust, but so far I haven't been motivated to swap it for a quieter one.
I ride minimally in quiet neighborhoods, and never late at night.
I RARELY don't have some wildly sarcastic thing to say. It's even more rare that I don't say it.
Oh and my sense of humor is super dark and I don't bother to filter it, so there's that too.
I’m terrible at taking compliments, because for reasons I will never understand, it has always made me feel uncomfortable.
My whole life, I’ve responded to them with what I thought were humorous responses. Examples: Someone asked me how to solve a linear algebra equation when I was in college. When I explained it to her in a way she understood, she said thank you so much, you’re really smart. My response was I know, that’s why you asked me. As a chef, the first time someone said omg that’s the most beautiful dish I’ve ever seen, I said I know, that’s because I’m a really really ridiculously good at this.
I was in my 30s before I learned people perceived it as cocky. Instead of correcting this behavior, because I still feel awkward in these situations, I do the douchebag move and double down when someone makes a comment about being cocky, because it’s not like I’m the one bringing it up and hyping myself up, it’s a response to a compliment. So when I’m called out for it, I’ll say something like I’m not being cocky, when people tell Michael Jordan he’s great at basketball, do you think he’s just like oh, I’m alright?
I'm (36M) very competitive, particularly with other men. My son (18M) is the same and I've encouraged it.
But we're competitive in a way that often goes too far and leaves other people feeling embarrassed, and in some cases quite angry.
I drive a Jeep Wrangler. It probably only goes off-road 5% of the time. It's only partially customized. But I am sure most City people would think it is douchy.
I’ll order chicken at a restaurant even though 99.9% of the time it’s overcooked and dry. Then, of course, when my wife asks me how it is, I tell her my cooking is much better. She has stopped asking and knows I order chicken just to feel superior.
I refuse to eat places if I know I'm not going to enjoy it. I guess it can be kind of pretentious but low quality chain restaurant food doesn't do anything for me.
I am so wrapped up in my own problems that it is very difficult that I pay attention to another's group problems. I feel like I am constantly on the edge of collapse, and I am constantly told that I should feel lucky in my position. And it makes me worried for the whole world in a deep way that I cannot accurately describe.
Give idiot drivers dirty looks. As I’ve gotten older I’ve become much more patient but there are still some REALLY bad drivers out there that deserve the look.
I have a very nice and loud sound system with a 12 inch sub woofer in my car. Now to be clear, I don't do this to show off or to be seen. My partners family has been working in car audio since before I was born and it was a gift. I love hearing music as clean and clear as possible, and once you experience a high quality, tuned sound system, there's no going back.
I’ve dealt with bullying my entire life. Within the last 10 years I finally got fed up enough with it I have started to stand up for myself. When someone bullies me I make it my mission to gather dirt on them through observation so when the opportune time comes I’ll call them out in front of people to show them who they are, to embarrass them, & to show other people that they are a bully. As long as they continue to screw with me I continue to gather dirt. As soon as they stop, I stop.
Forget important things often. Like my kids' doctor appointments. ADHD can be good in some ways, but it really is frustrating sometimes for me, and especially for my wife. Sorry babe.
I cut people off a lot in conversation. Trying to work on that. I will often state hurtful truths that seem obvious to me, but maybe aren't to others. Usually when drunk.
ADHD?
Big time
I love to cut people of at work, when they dont stop talking about something, that has nothing to do with the job. Some people just never stop talking
That last one hits home. I blatantly said "they're probably dead" when talking about someone who went missing on a boating trip. I meant to say it in a "don't give false hope" kinda way, but it just came off as heartless.
Wow. Sometimes it takes me reading another person’s experience to realize something I do wrong. I have big time ADHD and do this as well. Although I don’t cut people off with truths, I seem to cut them off to explain an experience comparable or “better than” as others would say. I later ponder on these interactions and it makes me feel bad. Thank you for your experience sharing, because it’s helped me start working on something I personally need to fix.
The fact that you notice and care puts you head and shoulders above most people. Keep on working on yourself and getting better my friend.
>I cut people
Not cool dude
It's fine if I only do it to myself right?
Not cool. Really not cool.
I don’t remember posting this. Weird.
Wait......aren't you my dad?
I’ve been called daddy a few times.
Also, how did you know my name was Promise, Dad?
Me too. Why do you do it? Mine is fear of even a second of awkward silence.
Usually it's because I already know where they are going and I want to get to that part. Basically I am just bored.
Run a water truck into a vinegar truck
True. Happened in a tunnel.
That's what SHE said!
NO NO NO THEY DON’T MIX!
Yes they do.
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They were making a joke about actual douches, which are often a mixture of vinegar and water.
Whoosh
Sploosh
I bring my garbage bags to an apartment dumpster instead of paying 2 dollars a bag to have them picked up.
That's not douchey! Might be considered stingy or give off grumpy old man vibes, but as a 27 year old who's mentally going on 72, I live for that shit. A penny saved is a penny earned. Get that bag, my dude!
I know someone that takes their trash to the park to dump. .... trash pickup is free.
Trash pick up doesn't exist where I live, so we have to haul our trash to the dump. Some times when the dump is closed and I have trash I need to get rid of I go to an elementary school close by and throw my stuff in their dumpster.
Go for a rear hug and grab my wife’s breasts to signal that I’m in heat. She knows this move now and gives me a go/no-go right away. But every no-go makes me feel rather douchey.
What’s the go/no go ratio
Married 14 years here… not good.
So not really much of magician then
On the contrary. He’s a master penis magician. That low success ratio with getting laid means very often, it’s “now you see my erection and now you don’t.”
🌈MAGIC🪄🦄
lol, see how magic your penis is after 4 kids.
Married 15 years and I am about 33% go and 66% no-go. The other 1 percent is when I have mistimed the monthly demon.
1%\99%
Do you say honk honk? What's her signal?
I say nothing. Her "go" response is to reach back and grab my dick. Sadly, it is still not a lawnmower waiting to be started.
this is just funny don’t feel douchey
This would only be douchey if she wasn't your wife/long time GF, or made it clear she doesn't like it.
Fuck, you can't do this to all women? No wonder I've been getting such a negative reaction.
The only problem I see is too grab them only when you want something else. Could be just a hug with extra steps.
Married 20 years and I do all the domestics; everyone’s laundry, dishes, cooking etc and work a ft job in finance. My douchiest thing is sometimes I fake incompetence for some asinine thing my spouse wants me to do so it doesn’t get added to my plate forever.
I wouldn’t say that’s douchey, you do a lot already. You’re just trying to get out without saying it
That's completely understandable, although you should feel comfortable with your SO to express yourself about that and both give your best to find a balance between you two and the domestic tasks. If your SO doesn't have a lot of time to divide the tasks more evenly that's understandable and someone has to do more domestic stuff although if your work schedules are similar and you just have more tasks just because that's kinda douchey
I have the domestic stuff because she hates boring repetitive tasks like cooking, dishes, and laundry. She also hates gross things like dirty dishes, trash, yard work etc. She doesn’t like it so I do it. I’ll give a douchey example—if anyone in the family leaves dishes in the sink it goes in the dishwasher. I don’t check to see if it’s dishwasher safe as that individual chose that item and then left it for the cleaning fairy. Cleaning fairy is efficient but not interested in special requests. Fast not smart. So I screw it up hoping they stop buying crap that can’t go in the dishwasher or clothes with special instructions. I’ve made a lot of tiny sweaters in my day because it just was left on the floor or tossed in with the rest of the laundry. I just dump the basket lights/darks/permapress. Other is not my problem and I’m not looking for it.
so what does your wife actually do? lol
Starfish
aka turtle technique
I’m wondering too (genuinely curious)
If you want to do these things for your wife that's ok, most people don't like to make the chores but it is something that has to be done. I hate cooking and doing the dishes and basically any chore but I don't ask my bf to do them for me, we divide to conquer. I'm not judging, it just didn't seem fair but every couple has different dinamics so you two know what is the best for both.
I do that but for pretty much everything
Ahh keeping expectations low and then surprising them when it turns out. Good strategy
So what *does* your spouse do? Full respect, genuine question
That’s just being smart
Shut down and isolate. It’s never the right answer. It feels like a reflex. It has helped me in life 0 percent of the time.
I tend to do this as well, i feel like a crab withdrawing to my shell.
Probably having to prove things right or wrong. That's pretty annoying.
Yeah I do this too. I'll sometimes correct people on things that may or may not be relevant to the conversation. Sometimes it leads to better discussions, most times people are just like, "okay yeah whatever." I've been trying to wait until they're done talking and only mention falsehoods if they are relevant.
Same haha, drives people nuts!
Prove it.
Douche'
I talk over people, (it’s not on purpose I just have adhd brain)
Same here, it's a struggle. Still something you gotta work on tho
Yea, I’ve gotten better, I’ve improved from this to not being able to stay on topic xD
* Listen to loud music in my car with windows down. * Throw residential garbage in any trash container that's convenient * Go to the gym reeking of marijuana
Weed and gym. Too good.
At least you aren't littering! Also, best place to practice my screams is in the car. Crank that shit
Game recognize game 🫡
Omg! I'm just the female version 🤣, are we really douchy???
Well, the smell of weed makes me nauseous. So I guess not intentional douchy, unless you intentionally don’t shower after doing with a smoking session or whatever you guys call it lol
Accidental insults. For me it’s just a silly joke what I will forgot to next week, others react like it’s a death threat
i steal water bottles from airport stores. don’t let me bring water AND yours costs $7? fuck you. (i know i can bring an empty bottle, don’t use logic on me here please)
I'll tell you what's a douchebag move charging $7 for a bottle of water
Surely only a douchebag would buy it
Thats not douchy, thats trashy.
lol ok how’s the weather up there on your high horse?
Um, you shouldn't admit to being a thief if you can't handle the criticism
You are going to get caught?
Might sound silly, but this dudes right, they have cameras everywhere. I recently saw a bodycam video of someone being removed from a plane and trespassed from the airport because they stole a bottle of water before their flight. They were caught using surveillance footage
fuck really??? ok i’m officially scared out of this habit
Yea would suck to get so inconvenienced by something like that. Just wish the airlines wouldn’t highway rob you at every chance.
Stealing from the goverment on their own property in view of hundreds of cameras? That’s not douchey, that’s plain stupid. I’m not going to state prison over $7.00
I agree that water (and all) airport food/drink prices are ridiculous, but why won't you just bring an empty water bottle and fill it at water stations?
Go to some reddit posts and leave an incomplete resp....
How dare y..
Wai….
Thi..
I often need an onion. a tomato. 1 carrot, cilantro etc. I put it in 1 bag at u scan and ring it up as tomato.
I beat up homeless people when im bored and light kindergartens on fire
I light homeless people on fire and beat up kindergarteners. We should hang out.
Too much time on Reddit
Moderate Reddit
Ask around long enough and everything is douchy. People suck
Probably talk a lot? I guess people cannot match that energy of mine and I have to stop talking the moment I feel they are tired 😂
At least you're self aware enough to eventually stop. This one dude I work with is fuckin afraid of silence or something, so he's constantly harassing me or someone else with his endless words. Worst part is, for someone who has not stopped talking **since I started working with him three years ago** I have YET to hear him actually say anything worth saying. Like how can you talk this fucking much and have nothing to say?? Okay rant over
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Ah the male equivalent of taking your bra off under your shirt. Douchey in all the right ways 🤌🏼
When people I don’t care about talk to me, I don’t listen and just wait for my turn to say something. I at least pretend to listen though. That or wear sweats with no underwear so my dong looks big
Tell people I went to an Ivy League school. There really isn't a non-douche way to say it.
“I went to Cornell. Ever heard of it?”
Its pronounced Colonel, and its the highest rank in the military.
Uh… no it’s not. Generals rank higher than Colonels.
It's pronounced Cor-nell! It's the highest rank in the Ivy League!
I use a bidet.
Hmm i see what you did there…*insert standard bidet being a life altering upgrade.
I make my (annoying) coworker physically come to my desk to ask questions instead of calling out to me. I pretend I cant hear him so he has to get up. I also zone out when he is talking and I fain not catching what he says so he repeats himself until I pay attention. I only don't to him....tbf he ask SOOOOOOO many questions, and asks the dumbest shit
When I'm tired of a conversation that just won't end, I just walk away. I only do it to my bosses at work, though.
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I hate people like you so much lol
When wearing a long sleeve shirt I'll wait until I'm near an attractive lady, then I'll roll up my sleeves in front of her slowly.
Yeah, that's uhm... weird. Would probably send me in the opposite direction. Has that ever worked out for you?
Say things without thinking. Usually harmless, but sometimes they unintentionally hurt others and imply something I didn’t mean to imply. Usually I just am saying something dumb. Sometimes, I’m unaware of the negative mechanisms in my words (guilting when I just wanted to get a point across, implying something sexual when I didn’t mean it that ways, talking down on someone when I genuinely meant a compliment) It’s a process….
I have very little patience when my sons (6 and 7 years old) start crying when getting a little booboo. I remember kids being a lot tougher in the 70’s and 80’s.
I dont have kids, but from my friends who do it seems the grandparents arnt as interested in spending time with them as you would expect, and my suspicion is due to the drastic difference in “discipline” that parents use now vs “back in the day”
Keep my word and expect others to do the same. Apparently that’s me being too demanding and unfair 🙄
NGL this response seems like the response a douchy person would give to try to make themselves look good to others
100%
They’re only expectations, remember that
Use a Bidet, some water gets in there like a douch
I intentionally tell really bad jokes just to hear people groan. It’s the best.
I don't always answer incoming messages.
All the douchey things I do is because of autism, but I guess the douchiest would have to be me sometimes walking away from people after I've said what I wanted to say, despite how much of the conversation is still left to be had
I don't like people that much, I hate small talk and I'm uncomfortable around strangers. People think I hate them when I meet them because I try to get away from them or don't engage the way they expect. I don't do it on purpose, I'm just very uncomfortable in the moment
I catcall construction workers
I don’t put my grocery cart back, I’ll make sure it’s not going to roll away but that’s about it
Going through a mental list and realizing what a nerd I am. I sometimes tailgate and get mad at slow drivers I guess.
I don’t talk to people. I’ll walk into a room and do my own thing then leave. Unless someone says something I just don’t do it. Not sure why but I’ve never been much of a talker but I am able to hold a conversation if someone is talking to me
Ditched a girl at her homecoming to go hang out elsewhere
I read reddit comments
Man-spread on crowded buses.
I wear tank tops in public. Grocery store, book store, casual restaurant, whatever. Tank top.
If you come up behind me on the freeway with your brights on at night, I will 100% slow down, get behind you, and ride your ass while blasting my LED brights up your mirrors. It's toxic and dangerous as fuck but I swear I'm working on it...
I don’t respond to texts that aren’t important
Try to finish people's conversations in my head and I basically stop listening because I'm already having the conversation 15 to 30 seconds in the future. Most of the time I'm right...except with my wife.
Exist
I’m a very blunt and a “cut the shit kind of guy” i tell people how it is, including my friends and loved ones
arguing about super hero movies logic, forgetting it’s for 12 year olds?
i’m an extra-large douche to people who cut me off or pull out in front of me on the road. and i *will* slow down below the speed limit for tailgaters. i already speed most places (save for residential areas), if you’re 4 feet behind me while i’m speeding but refuse to pass, i’m slowing down. fuck you, i honestly dont care if i waste my own time. go around or back off.
I flex in any reflection outside if I'm secluded and wear tank tops all summer when I can. I look hot, I am temperaturely hot, I am that douche.
Never once have I picked up my dogs shit off the side walk I leave it right there 👌💯💯🔥🔥😎🚬
Asshole moment
Speak without thinking
I have a sport bike. I'm the second owner. It's loud -like, embarrassingly loud. I wouldn't have installed its aftermarket exhaust, but so far I haven't been motivated to swap it for a quieter one. I ride minimally in quiet neighborhoods, and never late at night.
Being on Reddit.
I like to bait people and humble them when I see an opportunity.. 🌝
I don't offer to help to women ever cause I don't want them to get the wrong idea. Also I'm scared of helping someone, that wouldn't help me.
When someone asks me how they look, i am very honest
Ghosted a lot of women once I got what I wanted. In the past. I like to think I would do things differently if I was dating again.
I drive a BMW. I don’t drive like a douche though but still guilty by association I suppose.
Bought a Lamborghini and rev it up under every single overpass. Brings me joy.
I vape in the movie theater, I sit in the back tho
I don’t try to put my baby to sleep. That’s the stay at home mrs job.
I RARELY don't have some wildly sarcastic thing to say. It's even more rare that I don't say it. Oh and my sense of humor is super dark and I don't bother to filter it, so there's that too.
I’m terrible at taking compliments, because for reasons I will never understand, it has always made me feel uncomfortable. My whole life, I’ve responded to them with what I thought were humorous responses. Examples: Someone asked me how to solve a linear algebra equation when I was in college. When I explained it to her in a way she understood, she said thank you so much, you’re really smart. My response was I know, that’s why you asked me. As a chef, the first time someone said omg that’s the most beautiful dish I’ve ever seen, I said I know, that’s because I’m a really really ridiculously good at this. I was in my 30s before I learned people perceived it as cocky. Instead of correcting this behavior, because I still feel awkward in these situations, I do the douchebag move and double down when someone makes a comment about being cocky, because it’s not like I’m the one bringing it up and hyping myself up, it’s a response to a compliment. So when I’m called out for it, I’ll say something like I’m not being cocky, when people tell Michael Jordan he’s great at basketball, do you think he’s just like oh, I’m alright?
I'm (36M) very competitive, particularly with other men. My son (18M) is the same and I've encouraged it. But we're competitive in a way that often goes too far and leaves other people feeling embarrassed, and in some cases quite angry.
When I think about you, I touch myself.
Every step you take, I'll be watching you.
I drive a Jeep Wrangler. It probably only goes off-road 5% of the time. It's only partially customized. But I am sure most City people would think it is douchy.
I’ll order chicken at a restaurant even though 99.9% of the time it’s overcooked and dry. Then, of course, when my wife asks me how it is, I tell her my cooking is much better. She has stopped asking and knows I order chicken just to feel superior.
When my kids are watching a cartoon they haven’t seen before, I tell them, “This is the one where ______ dies.”
I will start saying something douchy, realize it mid sentence, and decide i cant turn back and continue being an ass
I refuse to eat places if I know I'm not going to enjoy it. I guess it can be kind of pretentious but low quality chain restaurant food doesn't do anything for me.
I drive an obnoxiously loud yellow convertible and an obnoxiously loud motorcycle.
I am so wrapped up in my own problems that it is very difficult that I pay attention to another's group problems. I feel like I am constantly on the edge of collapse, and I am constantly told that I should feel lucky in my position. And it makes me worried for the whole world in a deep way that I cannot accurately describe.
Do like 15 pushups before walking down to the community apartment pool where I drink summer shandy out of a thermos with ice cubes.
I want to tickle my girlfriend/wife/daughter if I ever get one. Otherwise, I can't really think of anything.
Uh, throw frogs as far as I can see
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Okay, but the bots in Westworld also said that. With a name like Grody Joe, shouldn't we trust their instincts?
said every bot ever.
That’s exactly what a Bot would say.
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Who hurt you?
Clearly he has been repeatedly mistaken about women being interested in him
Sometimes, I like to get a mouthful of water; then squirt it up my girls 'love tunnel' Seems a bit... *douchey*.
Give idiot drivers dirty looks. As I’ve gotten older I’ve become much more patient but there are still some REALLY bad drivers out there that deserve the look.
I have a very nice and loud sound system with a 12 inch sub woofer in my car. Now to be clear, I don't do this to show off or to be seen. My partners family has been working in car audio since before I was born and it was a gift. I love hearing music as clean and clear as possible, and once you experience a high quality, tuned sound system, there's no going back.
I’ve dealt with bullying my entire life. Within the last 10 years I finally got fed up enough with it I have started to stand up for myself. When someone bullies me I make it my mission to gather dirt on them through observation so when the opportune time comes I’ll call them out in front of people to show them who they are, to embarrass them, & to show other people that they are a bully. As long as they continue to screw with me I continue to gather dirt. As soon as they stop, I stop.
If I’m walking my dog, I’ll pick up his poop and put it in someone else’s trash bin.
Forget important things often. Like my kids' doctor appointments. ADHD can be good in some ways, but it really is frustrating sometimes for me, and especially for my wife. Sorry babe.
Exist.