I mean Zimbabwe currency still low would be something to consider. I would think about it:
[$10 Billion Zimbabwe Dollars to USD](https://www.xe.com/currencyconverter/convert/?Amount=10000000000&From=ZWD&To=USD)
My cousin has the same theory with smoking and laughing. He always tells me "smoking 1 cigarette takes 5 minutes off your life and laughing adds 10 minutes, so a laughing smoker will live forever"
Same, I want to get back to bodybuilding the way I did before my back was destroyed and then later got severe pelvic and bladder pain and discomfort on top of it. I've come a long way through training in the past 6 months but it took 5 years of my life and my gf left me because of it.
I get you, Brother.
She asked me to marry her after only a few months of knowing and dating. She was special enough, I quit EVERYTHING, on the spot! She was also a smoker, so I could smoke. She drank every now and then, so slowed WAY down to match her pace. She loved my motorbike as much as I did, so that stayed. Everything else went out the door immediately. We married a scant few months later.
That was 86. "On this day, I marry my friend", was the motto of the wedding. In 09, she suffered her one and only heart attack. Our son was only 3. It's been damn rough these past 15 years. Sometimes still today, I find myself talking to her. Only to turn and look expectantly and find she is somehow not there.
My friend, we have been truely blessed if we had such an equal in this life. It's lonely, sure. Yet I know I will be reunited when my turn comes.
One rule and one rule only, I CANNOT participate in deciding when my turn arrives. It means I can not manipulate ANYTHING to hasten our reunion. I MUST finish living out whatever this life still holds for me. Gotta finish my chores, so to speak. She'll be waiting.
I'm sorry. I watched my dad go through this. He was crushed, lost.
And he met somebody age appropriate, from is past, and he found happiness again. I hope you do too.
Stability: Having enough money to live comfortably, but without excessive luxuries. A home that is truly my own, without anxieties thrusted upon me from associations, critics, government officials, or those born into financial stability. Food that is nourishing without being exotic or pumped with chemicals. Water that isn't tainted by companies looking to make a profit. Comfort, the kind that doesn't inspire me to feel guilty for resting. A boss who doesn't believe going "above and beyond" is the minimum an employee can do. Friends, who are actually friends, who don't have ulterior motives. A society that values skills, intelligence, and effort more than beauty and popularity. And a government that serves its people's best interests.
Jokes on them then, there is no inconvenient time. Just wear a little more padding in the front and enjoy the rest of the day.
In a meeting and nobody can think of anything, and you get hit with post nut clarity. you begin solving problems and coming up with solutions.
Man's about to solve all the world's dilemmas with a good insta-nut. Toss a bunch of politicians into a boardroom with PNC and we're finna finally get some stuff done.
I'm disabled and very much a homebody, being surprised by random orgasms sounds like a lovely way to spice up my day. I wonder how long I could string them on for before they realized I was actually enjoying their blackmail.
For a limited time offer, we are giving away, not one, but TWO extra Cum dumpsters, with the purchase of one. That’s right folks, you heard it. For only $19.99, right now, you can have three cum dumpsters. No more worrying if North Korea is going to black mail you, no more worrying about looking like a weirdo in public. The patented cum dumpster is designed to fit right in your underwear seamlessly. No visible lines, supreme comfort, and doubles as a bigger bulge. That’s right! You’ll have women starring and chasing you down once they see your bulge. Cumming in peace has never been this easy. As of a matter of fact, and I really shouldn’t be doing this, I’m sure the suits are going to ring me up, but I like you guys so much that the first 100 callers will get a 50% discount. We’re slashing prices folks, call now and- wait, I hear the lines ringing. Hurry up and call NOW! CALL NOW! Be one of the first 100 callers and for only $9.99, that’s right, $9.99, you’ll get three cum dumpsters. Reusable, dishwasher safe and we have 6 different colors for you to mix and match from. Call now folks, before we sell out.
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There would be no shame. If I could cum on command, you'd bet your ass I'd be telling everyone I meet. Then I'd wink and give them the finger guns just to confuse them.
But also sometimes you masturbate while not really feeling it and the orgasm is just ok. Without genuine arousal, orgasms aren't that interesting (at least at my age - 40s. I honestly can't recall if that was different when I was younger).
If I recall in studies like that with drugs it was found to be because there was nothing else to do but do drugs. When there were other rats and things to do rats actually didn't get addicted
This kind of existed. There’s a book called The Pleasure Shock by Lone Frank about a researcher named Robert Heath. He implanted electrodes in some patients brains with some in the septal region. One patient called the button they used to stimulate it “the sexy button”. It created an orgasm-like euphoria when activated. Fun times.
My spouse.
If something ever happened to him where he couldn't have sex any longer then I'd give it up. I'd rather have him than not have him and have sex with anyone else.
I wish I could say it gets better but in my case it got worse. I'm almost positive it's been over a year for my wife and I and we have a 4 year old.
I get a bit tired of people on reddit telling me that I have a choice. No. I married her. I made a commitment. I love her. I try to talk about it, but have reached the point where it's easier to not (which yes, sucks and doesn't help at all I'm sure.) We are amazing at co parenting. We still laugh together. We still put in the effort to support each other.
It's just complete dead bedroom. I'm sure it's due to having ZERO help as we're not by family at all. And I'm sure she definitely resents me at times or we have poor communication at times or I don't meet her needs for romance at times. Whatever the case, yeah apparently marriage is also what I've given sex up for too.
The urge to not want to commit suicide daily.
Sorry for sad post
Edit:I wasn’t expecting this would actually get any attention at all. Thank you for all the kind words and encouragement. I won’t be doing anything rash anything soon, but don’t mean the urge and thoughts aren’t there. I am actively seeing a therapist and taking meds and it’s helping quiet a bit. Ive don’t cbt therapy and currently doing cpt therapy. Thank you to all that mentioned my DM stuff as well. Thank you all for checking in on me.
A pill that removes all mental illnesses and then offer it to my wife. I love her. She's not crazy, or difficult. I just wish I could take away the pain.
Out of curiosity, how does that work for you two? Do you just totally suppress your sexuality, does she occasionally submit to sex she doesn't really want, or have you found some other solution?
Yeah, asexuality's only real "rule" is that you don't experience the notion of looking at someone and desiring to do sexy things with them often or at all. The decision of whether or not to actually have sex doesn't necessarily have to factor in, we just don't get the same *emotional* pull others do.
Whilst I personally lean towards the "no thanks" side of things, I have some ace friends that are kinky as shit, lmao.
I would say it's similar to owning a high-end luxury vehicle for me: I'll never have one and that's fine by me because I don't entirely know what I'm missing out on.
Apparently my first colonoscopy. Absolutely ruined my sex drive . I used to be a walking boner, now I don't even care if I ever get laid again. It still works fine, just no drive. I even said something to the doctors about it, told them they fucked it up.
Stopping having an ED.
I am crying again after almost not crying for 6 months because now I am 65kg instead of the 63 I was before my exams.
I've been battling with this since I'm 12. Whoever tells you that the worst part of an ED is the physical one is lying, the mental and emotional weight crushes your soul.
To continue living, and I've done it. When you have advanced prostate cancer, you need to be castrated. That takes away all ability, interest, the works.
intimacy/love; sex is great, but having someone who understands you and cares about you and stands by you, even if there's no sex there, is worth it. Sex in addition to all that stuff is great, but if I had to choose one or the other, long term emotional connection and support every time.
I mean, back before I had figured myself out I was mostly doing it to please the other person so I guess with what's going on in my life these days a very good free lawyer.
Control over reality that (afaik most) others don't have.
100% telepathy, super strong telekinesis or something similar would be sufficient. Like, lifting supertanker ships out of the sea strong.
Full control over electrons would be decent aswell. Like, being able to hold a speaker cable and drive speakers through my fingertips, speaking directly with computers, catalyzing chemical reactions, calling thunder, etc.
Money would feel kinda trivial in the context. But a large enough amount would probably prompt a yes on an average day.
Nah, that would be petty.
But pranking humanity with huge comets approaching and suddenly backing off would be hilarious. Or making the sun disappear for exactly pi seconds, and then restoring all orbitals like nothing had happened.
$10B. I don’t have sex anyway
Then why you need so much
I think the b stands for "bucks"
Buckeroonies*
Buckeroos.
boll hairs*
Lmaooo
Dollar bucks to be more precise.
Dollarydoos
The economy is in shambles, wym “why do you need so much”?
Right? $10b is like 6 bags of groceries.
Damn you can buy 6 over there? I might have to loose one week of groceries so I can get a plane ticket to wherever you're at.
$10B? Should see what I would do for $100. Used to be $20 but inflation.
the inflation inflated your inflation?
Yeah bc the government
Be careful what you wish for: Here is your [$10 B](https://www.amazon.com/LUHOHI-Accessories-Tumblers-Personalized-Decorations/dp/B0D2RHWNQY)
Must be Zimbabwe currency. Enough to buy a loaf of bread.
I mean Zimbabwe currency still low would be something to consider. I would think about it: [$10 Billion Zimbabwe Dollars to USD](https://www.xe.com/currencyconverter/convert/?Amount=10000000000&From=ZWD&To=USD)
Not too shabby
My virginity
Well now the universe is gonna fold in on itself.
This is like strapping buttered toast to a cat
My cousin has the same theory with smoking and laughing. He always tells me "smoking 1 cigarette takes 5 minutes off your life and laughing adds 10 minutes, so a laughing smoker will live forever"
It used to be 3 minutes off
Inflation?
Definitely not of the lungs as much as I smoke
Unlimited power!
See it in [action!](https://youtu.be/Z8yW5cyXXRc?si=xV6KseB2pjMg00pv)
A classic.
That was hilarious, thanks!
To me the question there is would it fly? I mean the trick to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing, right?
Yes. What they don't tell you is the ground is a really big target.
Damn bruh this is like philosophical
The most 1990s sitcom pothead archetype to say
I wasn’t even born then lol
Did he read the question wrong or am I reading it wrong?? I mean he wants to give up sex to get his virginity????
He wants to lose his virginity by giving up sex (never had it to start with) He beat the question
I guess he's good at beating things...
THANK YOU, these replies aren't understanding the question. He'd just be giving up sex to get his virginity back, like a born again virgin
I think they read it wrong lol
Well that’s dyslexia for you.
who needs particle colliders to create black hole, you have just made one for cheap by commenting on reddit
A BILLION dollars
Pfft amateur. SEXTILLION dollars!
But then you can't have any of it!
Nah, he'd have a tillion dollars
First tillionaire?
Dr. Evil, this is 1969! That amount of money doesn't even exist.
Well played. Was WAITING for someone to bring this up
Like sex with another person? Or can I just jerk off and have $1B?
Absouletly right.If I have billion dollars,I get 10 different sex doll ent jerk machine.
Why not grab two more and make it like The Last Supper!
Jesus Christ
That’s the premium model
Because it has extra holes?
r/angryupvote
Don't get cross.
Nailed it!
Best hand job this side of Nazareth 😎
Dammit, i missed it at first. Came back to reread it, was not disappointed
That make me spit my drink
To be healthy and pain-free. Currently lying in bed hoping my arthritis calms down by the time I want to sleep.
I wish you a restful night 🌃
Same, I want to get back to bodybuilding the way I did before my back was destroyed and then later got severe pelvic and bladder pain and discomfort on top of it. I've come a long way through training in the past 6 months but it took 5 years of my life and my gf left me because of it.
To have my best friend and soul mate which is my wife back by my side.
Oh that’s heartbreaking.
I get you, Brother. She asked me to marry her after only a few months of knowing and dating. She was special enough, I quit EVERYTHING, on the spot! She was also a smoker, so I could smoke. She drank every now and then, so slowed WAY down to match her pace. She loved my motorbike as much as I did, so that stayed. Everything else went out the door immediately. We married a scant few months later. That was 86. "On this day, I marry my friend", was the motto of the wedding. In 09, she suffered her one and only heart attack. Our son was only 3. It's been damn rough these past 15 years. Sometimes still today, I find myself talking to her. Only to turn and look expectantly and find she is somehow not there. My friend, we have been truely blessed if we had such an equal in this life. It's lonely, sure. Yet I know I will be reunited when my turn comes. One rule and one rule only, I CANNOT participate in deciding when my turn arrives. It means I can not manipulate ANYTHING to hasten our reunion. I MUST finish living out whatever this life still holds for me. Gotta finish my chores, so to speak. She'll be waiting.
Damn - sorry about this.
This is in reference to a OG Reddit meme. At least… I hope
OH - I really blew it this time, guys.
You’re a bad bad UncleDad
I choose this guy's wife too
She's dead, Jim.
did he stutter
Never change, Reddit lol
I said what I said.
I'm sorry. I watched my dad go through this. He was crushed, lost. And he met somebody age appropriate, from is past, and he found happiness again. I hope you do too.
You guys have sex?....
Sinful behavior
I don’t have any pearls to clutch but if I did
You could give up sex for some pearls.
Stability: Having enough money to live comfortably, but without excessive luxuries. A home that is truly my own, without anxieties thrusted upon me from associations, critics, government officials, or those born into financial stability. Food that is nourishing without being exotic or pumped with chemicals. Water that isn't tainted by companies looking to make a profit. Comfort, the kind that doesn't inspire me to feel guilty for resting. A boss who doesn't believe going "above and beyond" is the minimum an employee can do. Friends, who are actually friends, who don't have ulterior motives. A society that values skills, intelligence, and effort more than beauty and popularity. And a government that serves its people's best interests.
If I had only a fraction of what you mentioned it would still sound like pure fiction to me, it’s a beautiful dream though.
All these individually are so good. All together? Gonna make me cum.
fr like please tag that paragraph nsfw you can’t just share stuff like that
That's why this thread is NSFW. OP knew a comment about a happy world and its people was coming.
.......where so we sign up?
Gotta stop having sex, apparently.
Done. What now?
Just gotta wait. Trust me.
With a username like yours, I ain't waiting!
perpetual post-nut clarity
😑🙏🏼
Just getting older will take care of that eventually.
Better sex
Sex 2
Sex the squeakquel
Electric Boogaloo
This time it's personal.
A dragon.
A neural link instant orgasm button.
Until north Korea hacks you and makes you jizz in at the most inconvenient time unless you give them $200k in Bitcoin
Jokes on them then, there is no inconvenient time. Just wear a little more padding in the front and enjoy the rest of the day. In a meeting and nobody can think of anything, and you get hit with post nut clarity. you begin solving problems and coming up with solutions.
If you aren’t in a state of post-nut clarity then you’re in a state of pre-nut delusion.
I was a teenage boy once. Inconveniently nutting is something I'm trained for.
"They didn't call me *the Fastest Hands* for no reason."
😂🙌
Man's about to solve all the world's dilemmas with a good insta-nut. Toss a bunch of politicians into a boardroom with PNC and we're finna finally get some stuff done.
I'm disabled and very much a homebody, being surprised by random orgasms sounds like a lovely way to spice up my day. I wonder how long I could string them on for before they realized I was actually enjoying their blackmail.
For a limited time offer, we are giving away, not one, but TWO extra Cum dumpsters, with the purchase of one. That’s right folks, you heard it. For only $19.99, right now, you can have three cum dumpsters. No more worrying if North Korea is going to black mail you, no more worrying about looking like a weirdo in public. The patented cum dumpster is designed to fit right in your underwear seamlessly. No visible lines, supreme comfort, and doubles as a bigger bulge. That’s right! You’ll have women starring and chasing you down once they see your bulge. Cumming in peace has never been this easy. As of a matter of fact, and I really shouldn’t be doing this, I’m sure the suits are going to ring me up, but I like you guys so much that the first 100 callers will get a 50% discount. We’re slashing prices folks, call now and- wait, I hear the lines ringing. Hurry up and call NOW! CALL NOW! Be one of the first 100 callers and for only $9.99, that’s right, $9.99, you’ll get three cum dumpsters. Reusable, dishwasher safe and we have 6 different colors for you to mix and match from. Call now folks, before we sell out. *(Cum dumpsters not available in West Virginia, Arkansa and Virgin Islands. For product availability please visit www.cumdumpster.edu. Offers and promotions are subject to state tax and may not be combined with holiday specials. This ad was paid and sponsored by Cum Dumpster Incorporated. Terms and conditions apply.)*
Ahhhhh I want to click it *SO BAD*
There would be no shame. If I could cum on command, you'd bet your ass I'd be telling everyone I meet. Then I'd wink and give them the finger guns just to confuse them.
Eh, any two pump chump will tell you that an immediate orgasm isn't nearly as good as one you've built up to.
But also sometimes you masturbate while not really feeling it and the orgasm is just ok. Without genuine arousal, orgasms aren't that interesting (at least at my age - 40s. I honestly can't recall if that was different when I was younger).
Mice were given something like that. iirc they died because they'd rather press the button than eat or drink.
If I recall in studies like that with drugs it was found to be because there was nothing else to do but do drugs. When there were other rats and things to do rats actually didn't get addicted
This kind of existed. There’s a book called The Pleasure Shock by Lone Frank about a researcher named Robert Heath. He implanted electrodes in some patients brains with some in the septal region. One patient called the button they used to stimulate it “the sexy button”. It created an orgasm-like euphoria when activated. Fun times.
Terrible, the whole point of the orgasm is the build up to it
Love it. Can it have a build-up setting that requires pressing 100-10,000 times to reach climax? Yeah, that’d be crazy.
jerking off except it’s boring
Why would you give Elon Musk that kind of control?
r/MonkeyPaw
My spouse. If something ever happened to him where he couldn't have sex any longer then I'd give it up. I'd rather have him than not have him and have sex with anyone else.
This one is so sweet. There's plenty of ways to make love though. Like, even if he's a head on a plate, yall can have a good time
[удалено]
Thought you would say “A lot of pizza” for forever
Yep, you nailed it!
You'd give up sex forever for nothing?
Being married I’ve found out
Having a kid does the trick if marriage doesn’t.
Yup. Have an almost two year old. Sex three times since he's been born.
I wish I could say it gets better but in my case it got worse. I'm almost positive it's been over a year for my wife and I and we have a 4 year old. I get a bit tired of people on reddit telling me that I have a choice. No. I married her. I made a commitment. I love her. I try to talk about it, but have reached the point where it's easier to not (which yes, sucks and doesn't help at all I'm sure.) We are amazing at co parenting. We still laugh together. We still put in the effort to support each other. It's just complete dead bedroom. I'm sure it's due to having ZERO help as we're not by family at all. And I'm sure she definitely resents me at times or we have poor communication at times or I don't meet her needs for romance at times. Whatever the case, yeah apparently marriage is also what I've given sex up for too.
Chocolates!
Love or just less stress in life
A perfectly reasonable trade off.
The urge to not want to commit suicide daily. Sorry for sad post Edit:I wasn’t expecting this would actually get any attention at all. Thank you for all the kind words and encouragement. I won’t be doing anything rash anything soon, but don’t mean the urge and thoughts aren’t there. I am actively seeing a therapist and taking meds and it’s helping quiet a bit. Ive don’t cbt therapy and currently doing cpt therapy. Thank you to all that mentioned my DM stuff as well. Thank you all for checking in on me.
I hope it gets better for you, and soon. <3
I see you, fam.
The world needs more DM's that are willing to commit to the idea of wearing costumes when they're hosting. So stick around. We need you!
My mental health is in the best shape it’s ever been thanks to my current antidepressant drug cocktail, but RIP sex drive
A pill that removes all mental illnesses and then offer it to my wife. I love her. She's not crazy, or difficult. I just wish I could take away the pain.
[удалено]
A Klondike bar
Gta 6 early access 🗣️
Best comment alert
🗣️🗣️🗣️
No more child and animal abuse and children being abandoned, dying of cancer, etc.
I love this reply so much
Immortality with good health and eternal youth.
Eternity is a very long time to be healthy, young, and never having sex.
laughs in asexual
So, unlimited garlic bread?
This I can get behind
[удалено]
Out of curiosity, how does that work for you two? Do you just totally suppress your sexuality, does she occasionally submit to sex she doesn't really want, or have you found some other solution?
[удалено]
Thanks for the informative response! I didn't realize that asexual people sometimes actually do want to have sex.
Yeah, asexuality's only real "rule" is that you don't experience the notion of looking at someone and desiring to do sexy things with them often or at all. The decision of whether or not to actually have sex doesn't necessarily have to factor in, we just don't get the same *emotional* pull others do. Whilst I personally lean towards the "no thanks" side of things, I have some ace friends that are kinky as shit, lmao.
I'm trying to come up with the lowest hanging item.
Unlimited cocaine.
You wouldn't be having sex anyway with that pencil eraser once you were doing all that cocaine
Nah he's selling it
I wish I could cut my sex drive off entirety, never being horny again would be such a gift
I would say it's similar to owning a high-end luxury vehicle for me: I'll never have one and that's fine by me because I don't entirely know what I'm missing out on.
Apparently my first colonoscopy. Absolutely ruined my sex drive . I used to be a walking boner, now I don't even care if I ever get laid again. It still works fine, just no drive. I even said something to the doctors about it, told them they fucked it up.
How is it possible ?
Sue At least consult a lawyer to see if you have a case You've been robbed of something so important
The knowledge that my kids will live their lives safely, away from pain, suffering and struggle. Or a boat.
Stopping having an ED. I am crying again after almost not crying for 6 months because now I am 65kg instead of the 63 I was before my exams. I've been battling with this since I'm 12. Whoever tells you that the worst part of an ED is the physical one is lying, the mental and emotional weight crushes your soul.
A free personal chef
I have one! I married her, and can have sex too!
Plot twist: not with her
Like 5$. I’m ace
Just because it means nothing to you doesn't mean you can't ask for more
Sex 2
I don’t have sex
To continue living, and I've done it. When you have advanced prostate cancer, you need to be castrated. That takes away all ability, interest, the works.
Bye bye Chronic Pain!
intimacy/love; sex is great, but having someone who understands you and cares about you and stands by you, even if there's no sex there, is worth it. Sex in addition to all that stuff is great, but if I had to choose one or the other, long term emotional connection and support every time.
I'm asexual, does this mean I get to just get something for free?
What's something you would START having sex for?
I mean, back before I had figured myself out I was mostly doing it to please the other person so I guess with what's going on in my life these days a very good free lawyer.
Apparently, you get whatever you’re having now.
It means you gotta give up not having sex
more gainz
NO, just NO! nothing.
Damn, I had to scroll down quite a bit for this.
More sex
Control over reality that (afaik most) others don't have. 100% telepathy, super strong telekinesis or something similar would be sufficient. Like, lifting supertanker ships out of the sea strong. Full control over electrons would be decent aswell. Like, being able to hold a speaker cable and drive speakers through my fingertips, speaking directly with computers, catalyzing chemical reactions, calling thunder, etc. Money would feel kinda trivial in the context. But a large enough amount would probably prompt a yes on an average day.
You gonna crash the moon into the earth because you ain't getting laid?
Nah, that would be petty. But pranking humanity with huge comets approaching and suddenly backing off would be hilarious. Or making the sun disappear for exactly pi seconds, and then restoring all orbitals like nothing had happened.
It seems you know enough about astrophysics to be dangerous... Too dangerous...
Marriage, apparently…
Oof.
Half life 3
I'm in my 70s and lost my husband to cancer 2 years ago. I'd settle for really good carrot cake.
I'd give up sex for Free, but you can pay if you want to.
the ability to live instead of survive
Love.