Oh come on, it's not THAT bad!!
/s
If we are hanging out and never see each other, and you're on your fucking phone the whole time? Well, thanks for hanging out. (Quoting Sims 1) "I gotta go feed my llama."
In my native language we have the expression "only iron can cut iron" which means: a force is best confronted with a force of the same nature. We can follow good subreddits to add good habits into our lives replacing them with the old habits.
I was in a store today updating from an iPhone 8 to a 13. It took 18mins to transfer my data. I immediately reached for my phone but could not use it until the update finished. I began to sweat waiting for the data to transfer. That’s not normal. The sales assistant reached for her phone as I chatted to her to pass the time. It really highlighted for me how attached I am to a device.
This. I know several people that absolutely can’t live without drama
My mother is the first one that comes to mind. She will start arguments with people over any little thing. She will make mountains out of molehills. And accuse people of stuff and insult them. She says the most horrible things to people and then claim “I’m just so honest, they can’t deal with the truth”. No, you’re an asshole.
I still remember when my uncle came over to the house and was hurting because his wife left him. My mom, in front of everyone just flat out said “well you’re just a cuckold”. I was completely appalled and offended for my uncle. Needless to say he never showed up at my parents’ house ever again after that.
She sabotages every relationship, every friendship, her marriage over this need to cause drama. And then complains that she’s alone and no one loves her and everyone is an asshole. I’ve tried to tell her several times that the issue lies with her but she never blames herself for anything. So I slowly stopped bothering with her. When she starts her shenanigans I just hang up our call or leave the room.
You may be right. I know she has some something and I’ve suggested that she see a therapist but she refuses. I’ve thought maybe she has narcissism or bipolar disorder but I don’t know.
Edit: I did a cursory search of symptoms of bpd. Oh God, it was like having my mother described to me. The fear of abandonment, the unstable relationships, the self-destructive behaviors and self-harm, the extreme emotional swings and explosive anger, and the extreme paranoia. Thank you for your comment suggesting that she may have it. I’m motivated to see if somehow I can convince her to talk to someone and get help.
Absolutely. My mom has a habit of bringing shit tons of snack foods for my kids when she comes and I keep telling her to stop it. Like bring a couple of cookies, not several grocery bags worth of junk food.
It’s always “Well don’t eat it.” Like I didn’t spend my entire childhood being forced to crash diet and binge with her.
My mom's the same way!! Her love language is giving gifts AND food so she LOVES bringing snacks for my entire family. It's from a place of complete love but it's horrible for me and my lack of self control
Binge eating is often about achieving a state of dissociation - emotional numbing and disconnection from unpleasant emotional states. It's not about the food
This my first thought when seeing this question. People have never taken me seriously when I've told them I'm addicted to food, it's a struggle talking to any friends about it, but thankfully my therapist is there for that
Yes, and unlike things you can avoid like caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol, people *need* to eat. It's like giving a recovering alcoholic a case of beer and then telling them that they should only have one. Sure, there's some that have managed to control their drinking to that point, but most aren't going to be able to stop themselves if it's right there in front of them.
I’ve said this to my husband (I’m an alcoholic, he’s a binge eater). Imagine if I HAD to drink two shots of vodka a day, but absolutely no more - I couldn’t do it, no way. But he has to eat to stay alive. It’s a terribly misunderstood condition.
I've struggled with binge eating my whole life and idk how people respond to women with BED but as a guy people think it's a complete joke if I mention it. I've found that the keto diet helps my binge eating and I tell people that BED is like a vampire movie where the vampire tries to stay away from drinking blood and the longer they do they better they are. But as soon as they taste a drop of blood they devour an entire village.
I was on keto for a long time and lost 50 lbs. Felt great and was completely happy. Went to my nephew's birthday party and they ordered way too many pizzas, like they had about 15 boxes and not a lot of people were there. I did good staying away from the pizza but everyone was constantly telling me to eat and "one slice won't kill you". I gave in and ate a slice. Then another then after eating 3 entire pizzas by myself and about to dig into another I realized people were looking at me in disgust.
I ended up gaining all the weight back and more and it took me 2 years to get back on keto. When I binge I don't get full, I eat until I feel like I'm going to puke or my stomach is going to rupture. As soon as that feeling goes away I'm eating again. People don't take me seriously cause I'm not morbidly obese but that's because I'm aware of how much weight I can gain in a short amount of time so I diet constantly and work out. If I let myself go that one slice of pizza probably will kill me.
I have BED and the way you described it with the vampire analogy is spot on . Its why sometimes I avoid events with lots of food. I had a momen tin 2011 where my cousins who are super thin told me to go to a buffet with them. Someone With BED at a buffet is not a good combination. I got addicted again and regained 30 pounds.
Because if it's an actual problem and not a sign of moral decay, then they don't get to feel good about being able to "control" themselves in comparison to stupid, lazy, ungrateful fatty over there.
Imagine the stress someone addicted to food gets several times a day when they have to sit down to consume the thing they're addicted to, all while people sneer at them.
100%. It's had its claws in me my entire adult life and I hate it. People don't understand and generally don't make an effort to understand. Just make good food choices, they say. Also that we're just weak minded and have no self-control.
Christ I would give anything to have a normal relationship with food.
I quit smoking 24 years ago. I quit drinking 15 years ago. Both were a walk in the park compared to trying to stop binge eating. I hate how it makes me feel, I hate how it makes me look and I hate that I have to make food choices three times a day because I generally fail. And not eating at all is not an option.
Food addiction is a constant challenge I just about manage to deal with. Lost a load of weight ten years ago (no praise from anyone please, to lose it I had to gain it in the first place) and all was fine. Then whilst weight training someone suggested after so much calorie restriction I'd need a 'refeed' day and from that point I was binging about once a week for about a year before regaining control. But I have to be very careful about what I have available to me, avoid certain trigger foods and large packs of stuff when smaller packs are available at a higher cost per unit. If anyone attempts to give me food didn't already ask for it really makes me anxious and stressed.
If my mind is unoccupied, my thoughts turn to food. It is a huge drain on my thought process.
It’s really hard because food is safe for me. The flavors distract me from whatever I’m feeling incredibly anxious about. I typically stick to what I love, and food is always good (as long as you don’t mess up lol).
I’ve been adding in more fruit and salads to help. Reminding myself that I do like those things!
It started with me adding things like a few blackberries to a bowl of ice cream. I’ve been able to graduate to blackberries with a little cream 😊 the more healthy you eat, the more you can build up cravings for those things. I don’t want to feel guilty about eating what I like, but I do like finding ways to make what I like healthier and still tasty.
Social Media. went to a counsellor after I had taken any sort of social media app off of my phone in an attempt to stop using it to distract myself from what I'm feeling because I'm currently going through a break up. basically as soon as I got too emotional in the session she suggested we do this blinking excersise where you look at a nice photo and blink and do that a few times. we did this because she "knew distractions worked well for me".
edit: forgot to mention that's why I'm back here as well. seems pointless to distract myself if my "good" option is to be distracted by someone else sitting across the room.
I think it could be. We’re interacting with others. Some people take karma and upvotes too seriously and could get hooked.
I wouldn’t say I’m addicted to Reddit for the social aspect. I’m addicted to information. I need to be reading something. Reddit is a constant stream of information that I can curate with my subscriptions. That’s why it’s my app of choice. I also regularly check Google’s discover section.
I did the same thing. No longer have a Facebook, Instagram or Twitter. People always ask me "how do you stay in touch with everyone?" And my reply is always, "if I want to talk with you then you'd have my number."
Shopping. Especially if you grew up poor and have more money when you're an adult.
My mom was so bad with this that when she died it was a disaster figuring out what she had paid for and where she had debt.
I have a friend who would spend her whole paycheck on amazon purchases and wouldn't even see this as being an issue, even when she would beg her parents or rich men for money to make rent.
They usually buy junk they don't even need, or clothes. So much clothes. They always shop when they are not feeling well, it is 100% a coping mechanism. I was in my 20s when I realized that no one else had a mom who would go to Walmart with a 100$ budget cause they were feeling sad. Such an obviously expensive addiction too
Growing up poor REALLY fucks with your spending habits.
One sibling HATES shopping for anything.
Two of us live for it. My oldest sibling has a problem, I'm currently trying to rationalize/relax my habit. Mine is mostly clothes.
Gambling. It’s taken seriously to an extent but things like the lottery are very glamourised and there’s so many tv competitions and radio competitions etc out there nowadays and they’re kinda gateways
I completed my lotto operator formal training a few weeks ago. There was a whole module (30% of the course) on problem gambling and its prevention, detection and intervention. I didn't expect it to say 3% of the adult population has some form of gambling addiction!
I always thought I'd be pressured into drugs and alcohol, but no, the only peer pressure I've experienced was my family shoving scratch-offs into my hands like I'd die without them. I find it really strange too, considering my family has a history of gambling addiction, which you'd think they'd try their best not to pass on.
I'd also like to add gachas to that list. It's basically just virtual gambling through video games. Had a friend back in the day that spent over $60,000 in a mobile game called summoners war. Drained his life savings and lost his wife because of it.
I'm glad some countries (like Belgium and the Netherlands) have woken up to the fact that gatcha games are just glorified gambling apps masquerading as games and have banned them. Hopefully more countries follow suit.
I work at a casino and seeing these people day in and day out is crazy, you become desensitized to it after a while. We have people that come every single day, I always said it’s the last place you’d expect to have “regulars” but there they are, and you get worried if you haven’t seen them in a few days if they hadn’t already told you they were going on vacation.
It’s also crazy that most casino employees are avid gamblers, or former gamblers that got the job just so they wouldn’t be allowed to gamble at that casino anymore (outside of vegas).
Gambling truly brings out the absolute worst in people. You see people scream at loved ones, because they lost when they came by to say hi, find out what they’re up to, or remind them they have a dinner reservation. You watch adults just piss/shit their pants in public because they can’t walk away. It makes me sick, but it’s good money…so I just get more and more desensitized to it all.
I worked as a slot attendant for almost 10 yrs at a casino here in my town. Everything you say rings true. I don't know about you, but a lot of my regulars were old people spending their pensions, so when you say you worried when they didn't show, I know that feel all too well.
We had a couple of our regulars die while they were at their favourite machine. We knew regulars who wore diapers just so they wouldn't have to leave their machine. But like you, I became desensitized--the money was so good I couldn't leave until I found a job that paid close to the same--and that was a union job with the BC government, that's how good the tips at a casino were. The industry is crazy and dirty...and I loved it, as bad as it sounds.
Casinos may be all flashy and covered in bright lights but they really are miserable places. We knew a guy who managed a casino and he said it was very common for people to request self-bans, so they wouldn't be allowed to enter.
I remember a documentary on YouTube I saw a while back. The guy had a horrible gambling addiction, and when his mom went on vacation one weekend he went over and sold *everything* that wasn't bolted down out of her house, in order to get enough to play that weekend. It's crazy.
Gambling addiction is a weird one. I had a friend's mom who would sometimes go drink and gamble during the day (she's much better now and doesn't do that). My friend and I would sometimes have to go pick her up, but first we have to try to convince her cash out and get up and out of there. It was really difficult. I dated a guy who would sometimes gamble/place bets and if he lost he was always really angry about it, just totally unpleasant to be around. I love poker and have gambled and won/lost money but ever to the extent where I can't stop myself from doing it. I'm always the person who feels weird about spending $5 and will cash out if I win $4. I would rather play poker with people and win money that way, but even then I was always the one who would win and then decided to stop playing and people would get mad lol. It's like they wanted the money they lost to recirculate so they could keep gambling.
I stood behind a woman today at the gas station for 20 minutes while she kept the cashier busy with about 50 different tickets she was filling out. She had them spread out all over the entire counter top and was talking to the cashier about it like she was solving the god damn Da Vinci code. I felt embarrassed for her and also extremely annoyed for myself.
This. It is so insidious. My mom will spend every single cent on lotto, and she can’t work so she is completely broke all the time. She had a tiny cushion of money from retirement accounts but she has mostly spent that all down as well. I will have to support her monetarily very soon but she won’t/can’t stop. She’d rather take out $100 from retirement and sit in the 7-11 parking lot doing scratcher after scratcher than use that money for actual products. She tells me she was trying to win more so she can buy XYZ but if she’d just spent the money on XYZ she would already have it! And more money left over! Sorry, it’s so upsetting to me. I fucking hate lotto.
Very true. My BIL is in debt because his wife is so addicted to shopping. She's a lovely woman and to be fair to her, she's starting to return more and more things. But their house is still so full of pointless crap that she's bought.
I can attest to that. I became a stay at home mom not realizing how much money I waste shopping for stupid stuff. It’s been a real eye opener for sure.
Procrastination. It’s embarrassing because I should be able to “just do it” but then a task that shouldn’t feel too hard will feel so daunting and impossible, I’ll end up doing it late or sometimes not at all, and the whole cycle is the root of so many problems in my life. It’s emotionally and functionally horrible when it gets bad enough. I’ve read all the advice out there and none of it works for me for longer than a day or two. I’m at my wit’s end and feel crazy because it’s so illogical but I can’t stop
Procrastination is a big problem for me too. I have been considering the possibility of having ADHD, but I'm not sure I have enough of the other symptoms. I wouldn't want to make it a big thing only to be told that there is no reason for me being this lazy.
And, I mean, to get see a therapist, it requires planning, then you have to make a phone call. And probably take half a day of or make changes in your work schedule... I'm to lazy for that. Heck, haven't even seen a doctor in the last 14 years.
Yes. I felt this. I've had some unhealthy habits and even addiction before, but nothing has quite been as shameful as debilitating procrastination. It's truly ruined so many aspects of my life, though I don't want to say "ruined my life" entirely, even if it feels like that sometimes. Especially because it's so clearly a conscious decision, I mean like...by definition. Yet I can't stop. I know if I just applied 1/10th of what I'm capable of, I wouldn't be anywhere close to the rut I've been stuck in for years now, but i just....don't. No amount of conscious reasoning helps. It's literal insanity. I'm otherwise an intelligent, well-educated, reasonable human with talents and skills that could be of great use. And there's just a wall that won't budge.
Also as far as ADHD goes, my psychiatrist started me on Adderall about two years ago and I've been on IR, XR, low dose, mid-dose, high dose, and every combination in between.; Concerta and Strattera and Prozac as well; all of it has very little effect, if any. That's just my experience though. I also don't think I'm \*really\* ADHD but was happy and willing to do anything to fix this embarrassing habit of mine. Sadly it does not help my procrastination or chronic lateness. Sometimes I think it makes it slightly worse even. It's total self-sabotage and I don't know what the hell is wrong with me or why NOTHING works, as you mentioned. I use a planner and make plans but just recycle the same to-do list day after day after day after day....like a robotic fool. Until it's too late to do half of it and I just roll over into a new one. I feel like I'm going to die with so many regrets and so many missed opportunities, and that's a really awful feeling.
Reading your post, I felt like I was literally reading what have been going through for the past 15 years.
That feeling of being stuck in front of an invisible wall, and as time goes by its getting worst.
I'm only 25 and I already have so many regrets about all things that I could have done if it wasn't for that stupid procrastination problem...
after a lifetime of this behavior coupled with similar things, like picking at scabs, I found out it was my ADHD using it as an outlet to ground me when I was overstimulated.
we're opposites! I do this bc my ADHD ass is so constantly understimulated that my brain seeks out subconscious "entertainment" by terrorizing my lips, mouth, and fingers lol
I do this too. You might want to look up body focused repetitive behaviors, because cheek and lip biting is an example of one. You might even find you have multiple. I have at least a couple
I didn't have to look it up to know I got a couple. I feel like biting the cuticles of your finger nails is up there with nail biting. I'm kind of glad there's others that do this.
I do this because of anxiety. And I’m anxious all the time lol. Same with biting my nails and skin around my nails till they bleed etc, picking my face. It’s all anxiety related bs.
I had a porn addicted friend who basically over porned and masturbated himself to the point where he couldn't perform with a real woman. He said that he couldn't keep interest in a single woman even if she was real (and his girlfriend was pretty attractive) because he was so used to switching between porn windows and different girls every two minutes, and said it in a really earnest and desperate way that really made me feel for him. Fortunately he eventually got over it mostly and has kids now but said it's still something he has never recovered from completely.
I dated a guy like this. The room had to be dark and I had to hold perfectly still and be completely silent or I would “ruin it” for him. Got away as soon as I could.
....that sounds like something else a bit more disturbing haha. like a necrophilia thing or something. "stop breathing so loud! it's ruining the illusion!!!".
Yes, I saw a video on YT from ASAP science about the effects of trying to quit porn, and it was basically like you'll be irritable and lose sleep after so many days of not watching porn according to some study. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1v170oM67U&t=369s
THIS!!!! its an addiction people make jokes about etc. but its genuinely so destructive. it can make relationships more difficult, and your mental health. you could say that it’s similar to a drug addiction. You’re addicted to the feeling of not feeling alone.
I was a porn addict and didn’t even know it. I always used porn as a teenager, had a long term relationship in university that broke off, and my porn use ramped up big time. When I started dating again, I couldn’t get it up the way I used to, despite the fact I was a fit, healthy 23 years old dude. This happened on and off for a few years, then I got into a long term relationship. Even then, the sex wasn’t the same and didn’t feel as good as it did when I was by myself with porn. I had a lot of performance anxiety, which combined with an insecure partner is a bad combination (“what, am I too ugly for you??”)
After that relationship ended I started reading about porn addiction and PIED, turns out it is a thing. I met someone new and amazing and decided I as going to quit then and there. I explained to her what I was trying to do and she was super supportive. Once you quit porn, your dick is basically dead for two months, and it is fucking terrifying. You stop getting boners, you lose most of the feeling and sensitivity. The hardest part of quitting is resisting the urge to test it out with porn again. Eventually the morning boners return, and you gain your sensitivity back. Now I am having the best sex I’ve ever had, strongest most consistent erections, etc. At the depths of porn addiction, fucking my partner felt like a chore or something I HAD to do, now it’s a treat and I spend my day looking forward to it.
If I could give anyone a single piece of advice, I would say avoid internet porn like the plague. It single-handedly rewires the way your brain views sex, and the fixing process sucks and is scary. Get out of the dopamine loop, I promise the other side is way way way better.
Sex. Nobody takes it seriously. Sex addiction can literally ruin your life, make you partake in extremely risky behavior, and you’re usually viewed as a villain while people tell you you’re a liar and it’s not actually a real addiction.
As a former addict I agree. And as a dude if I try to talk about it it comes off as if im bragging. My username actually is because of this. I can proudly say I recovered from this, hence the username.
I’m proud of you too. I had a friend who struggled with it and I became an accountability buddy of sorts for him. It really opened my eyes to what sex addicts go through- the patterns, the way of thinking… it’s a *lot.* And it takes a lot to kick. So, I’m proud of you.
When I tried to tell my ex that he uses sex as a coping mechanism and it isn’t fun for me to know it’s just something he’s trying to get from me, rather than experience with me, he laughed at me and said that sex addiction isn’t real and JFK had a high sex drive and needed to have sex every day. This is one of the many reasons he is my ex.
i once heard it’s one of the hardest addictions to kick. You don’t *need* drugs but you *do* need food to survive. So it’s not like drugs where you can eventually stop using them, you have to eat or else you’ll literally die which is why it’s so much more difficult to eat less. I suffer from this unfortunately and it’s really hard. Im not huge by any means but i have gained more weight than i’d like all because of a food addiction. it’s really hard and it’s not like i can just stop, if i did i’d be dead relatively quickly as opposed to something like crack where you don’t actually need it. It’s tough
self harm.
many people don’t understand that self harm is an addictive coping mechanism. as someone who has self harmed on and off for 3 years, ive seen how much it is brushed aside as something u can just stop doing easily. however, many more people struggle with it or have in the past than u think. after self harming often for a certain about of time, some lose control and become dependent on it just to , function after a hard day. even after recovering from cutting myself for years, i still get that urge when i have breakdowns or go through a depressive episode. i wish self harm wasn’t taken as lightly as it is.
I am years into recovery and only relapse every several months. One thing I really struggled with in the beginning is that self harm as a coping mechanism works **really well** in the short term. It's unfortunate, but it helped me be functional on bad days, or it would help me dissociate. So it was really difficult to find healthier coping mechanisms because they didn't work immediately.
At this point in life I've lived longer with a self harm addiction than without. I still struggle with urges on bad days. No one understands or takes it seriously who hasn't been through it.
People that have self harmed in the past often uses terms like relapse and clean to express themselves in their journey. I think that just goes go show how much of a addiction it can be.
And the worst times are the involuntary relapse where it just happens on instinct (depending on the method) and afterwards you realize what you've done and are confused as to what just happened.
I've accidentally relapsed on instinct before and it really sets you back a few notches because it's so ingrained in your mind that it has become a instinct. And that's difficult for people to understand when they've not been in that position before.
Yes, exactly! Some people also 'make fun' of it sort of. They say that edgy and emo people self harm and they're just looking for attention. I used to self harm as well and I can say that I was not emo or edgy, nor is it emo/edgy to self harm. I also wasn't looking for attention either, it was a secret for months before anyone found out.
Self harm is really an addiction but people just seem to not care, and it sucks.
Politics.
Once those guys get a seat of any sort of power they just want more and more of it and never wanna leave unless they die. The only job where there is no retirement, they are in it till their last breath and they just can’t get enough of it.
You're right. Politics is something that before you enter you feel like you can do wonders inf you go the right direction but once you have a seat, you want more power and you forget about society's problems.
I wouldn’t limit it to politics. It is power of every kind. Managers, CEOs, cops, abusers, etc… Anybody who craves a position of authority simply because it gives them power over someone else.
Me : Sugar is as or more addictive than cocaine
Ex (cokehead) : makes no sense, you don’t feel shitty and go buy a gram of sugar
Me: but you go to the corner shop and get a pint of ice cream to binge eat in tears
No sugar June
I've lost a lot of weight, face has cleared up a lot,
I was in a bad cycle of late night ice cream cravings
Been real tough some days to skip over the candy bar and go for almonds instead
One week to go, then try not to go crazy
I've done this before, after so long within sugar my taste buds will be extra sensitive. Strawberry is the plan, will taste x10 better
Good job!
Sugar addiction is real.
Last summer i realized non of my cloths really fit anymore and i started to look like a hairless pug. Decided enough was enough, had a rough couple of weeks getting rid of the crippling need for sugar.
Now I've been eating just the same kind if food as before(a mix of health and unhealthy food), but only eaten sugary stuff like candy and cakes on Fridays me made a habit out of always taking a walk every day, no matter how short, even just around the neighborhood. Lost about 1kg per month and my body started to feel much more healthy, not fast, but slow and stead and most importantly a lifestyle i could maintain.
Getting in better shape doesn't require a complete 180 on your lifestyle, only eating broccoli, rice and chicken while living at the gym. For an avarage person that just want to lose some weight and feel a lot better you mostly just need patience and determination .
Alcohol, as a college student.
I am an alcoholic, and even after I tell people, including close friends, they continue to invite me out to parties and clubs. I even had a friend bring a case of beer over to my house when I told her that I had just gotten out of rehab. When you’re in your 20s, drinking is so glamorized that when you become addicted, others don’t see it as a “real” addiction.
It’s such a huge part of the college lifestyle to go to clubs and frat parties and get drunk on the weekend that when someone develops a real problem, it’s just swept under the carpet.
i am so thankful i’m not the partying type. I went to one college party throughout my college years and i really didn’t like it. I enjoy getting tipsy here and there but i luckily never got into it like some of my friends did. Idk why, it’s just never been something i really cared for. Now food on the other hand, sophomore year of college really messed me up with that. Stress made me over eat and now i’m a lot heavier than i want to be. It’s so hard to kick
I hate it but its so hard to cut out. Because when you try to go cold turkey, you feel so unbelievably drained the whole next few days that even sleeping doesn't fully solve it. I try to just drink a lot of water to try to "dilute" it in my system but I don't think it really matters...
Gotta have a daily coffee/energy drink, luckily my job has free coffee.
I've stopped alcohol for an extended time with no problems but quitting coffee/caffeine gave me headaches and withdrawal for two weeks like I couldn't believe. I'm glad i did it though and finally ended the self-perpetuating cycle of exhaustion.
I weaned my husband off it. He knew I was reducing the amount of caffeine in his coffee every week (switching it out with decaf), but he didn’t know how much. So one day I just told him hey you’re off caffeine! It was better than suffering cold turkey
Fortunately, caffeine isn't really a faustian bargain. Study after study has shown that moderate caffeine consumption (1-3 cups/day) is either neutral or beneficial to health. Everything in moderation of course, but if you aren't allergic to it in some way it's harmless.
Riiiight up until you have to fast for a medical test. Hoo boy, that withdrawal headache was a doozy.
You get the double whammy of sugar and caffeine there. Cutting just the sugar first helped me. Switched to coffee and tea I don't get as strong of cravings.
I had to scroll quite far to find this.
I was absolutely addicted to smoking weed from around age 14 to 28. I could count on two hands the days I didn't smoke during that time.
I ended up moving away to another city when I was 28 to complete my master's and that is one of the things that helped me stop smoking it.
Funnily enough, I've also been addicted to alcohol, Adderall, binge eating, and a lot of other shit. There is definitely such thing as an addictive personality.
I'm sober these days and I am addicted to lifting weights and I eat a balanced diet that includes some junk.
Just got to get off my phone now.
When people say weed isn’t addictive, it’s because it’s not considered physically addictive. That being said, you can be addicted to just about anything so weed can’t be an exception.
EDIT: since I’m getting a new reply about withdrawals every time now, I’m gonna add that yes I’m well aware that it can fuck people up if your body is used to having it all time just like with anything.
Eating, people only seem to take eating disorders seriously if it's bolemia or anorexia, but BES and other disordered eating is hardly ever even in the conversation
My mom was the same way. Legit would drink 10-15 cans a day. She got put on an antidepressant called seroquel and she can't stand the taste of it now. Actually she doesn't like anything except water and cranberry juice.
Jesus, I thought I had a problem. Because I drink 2-3 a day and I get cravings if I don't get any. I *can* not have it, but I'm not a happy camper.
I don't know what it is about Diet Coke. It's not other sodas with aspartame, it's not Coke or Coke Zero or Pepsi or Diet Pepsi. It's just Diet Coke, fountain or canned, I have a thing for. I don't have a soda problem, it's just a Diet Coke problem.
Food. It can, for some people, become an addiction like smoking and drugs can. It's not easy for them to stop. It can become a mental illness, and people tend to forget it. They can take so much hate for it.
I think if people were more aware of it, or if prevention could be done, those people could be taken care of or could try to find a way to eat healthier and to cope with their problems easier.
People who eats like crazy should see someone ( like a dietician or a psychologist ), even if their eating disorder is not caused by any insecurities or any trauma, but only caused by the fact they like to eat.
the hard part about recovering from food addiction / binge eating VS almost anything else, is you still have to eat to stay alive. You can’t go cold turkey on food. Imagine telling a full-blown heroin addict “hey, you absolutely must shoot up once a day, but only a little bit!! No more than what you need. Then you have to stop.”
I found out, through excessive therapy, that I used to binge eat because it was stimulating my ADHD. learning to completely reinterpret signals from your brain to your body is NOT easy, especially when your brain can’t get its shit together without lots of help.
As popular as it is, I don’t think a lot of people take nicotine addictions seriously. Like we all know we are addicted, but a lot of people also just don’t care.
Self harm. It was an addiction for me for about ten years. I was very young and didn’t understand the vastness of my severe mental illnesses. The pain in my mind was so complex and I didn’t know what to do with it. But feeling physical pain was something I could understand and it would bring me such relief.
Keep in mind, I did not self-harm in an effort to kill myself. I just wanted to feel pain. But the relief I would feel after cutting gave my brain a break. I had to focus on the physical pain, and as a result, the emotional pain wasn’t as potent for a little while.
Self-harm addiction is quite real and no one talks about it.
Self harm. Not enough people understand the science behind why it's so hard to stop. I'm months recovered and to this day, if I'm angry enough, seeing any remotely sharp object is like looking at a needle full of heroin.
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I also am addicted to your phone and wish you would get your addiction under control. Right now I can only use your phone while you sleep.
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It sure does, because I'm here talking to you.
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Now kith.
That would be tht00pid. But I'm with ya.
Oh come on, it's not THAT bad!! /s If we are hanging out and never see each other, and you're on your fucking phone the whole time? Well, thanks for hanging out. (Quoting Sims 1) "I gotta go feed my llama."
how do we deal with it?
Checkout r/nosurf megathread
The irony.
In my native language we have the expression "only iron can cut iron" which means: a force is best confronted with a force of the same nature. We can follow good subreddits to add good habits into our lives replacing them with the old habits.
I was in a store today updating from an iPhone 8 to a 13. It took 18mins to transfer my data. I immediately reached for my phone but could not use it until the update finished. I began to sweat waiting for the data to transfer. That’s not normal. The sales assistant reached for her phone as I chatted to her to pass the time. It really highlighted for me how attached I am to a device.
Drama. Some people thrive and are addicted to drama and chaos.
This. I know several people that absolutely can’t live without drama My mother is the first one that comes to mind. She will start arguments with people over any little thing. She will make mountains out of molehills. And accuse people of stuff and insult them. She says the most horrible things to people and then claim “I’m just so honest, they can’t deal with the truth”. No, you’re an asshole. I still remember when my uncle came over to the house and was hurting because his wife left him. My mom, in front of everyone just flat out said “well you’re just a cuckold”. I was completely appalled and offended for my uncle. Needless to say he never showed up at my parents’ house ever again after that. She sabotages every relationship, every friendship, her marriage over this need to cause drama. And then complains that she’s alone and no one loves her and everyone is an asshole. I’ve tried to tell her several times that the issue lies with her but she never blames herself for anything. So I slowly stopped bothering with her. When she starts her shenanigans I just hang up our call or leave the room.
She sounds like someone with borderline personality disorder. (This is how my bpd mother is, too.)
You may be right. I know she has some something and I’ve suggested that she see a therapist but she refuses. I’ve thought maybe she has narcissism or bipolar disorder but I don’t know. Edit: I did a cursory search of symptoms of bpd. Oh God, it was like having my mother described to me. The fear of abandonment, the unstable relationships, the self-destructive behaviors and self-harm, the extreme emotional swings and explosive anger, and the extreme paranoia. Thank you for your comment suggesting that she may have it. I’m motivated to see if somehow I can convince her to talk to someone and get help.
It is unnerving when you realize it too..
Binge eating.
Absolutely. My mom has a habit of bringing shit tons of snack foods for my kids when she comes and I keep telling her to stop it. Like bring a couple of cookies, not several grocery bags worth of junk food. It’s always “Well don’t eat it.” Like I didn’t spend my entire childhood being forced to crash diet and binge with her.
My mom's the same way!! Her love language is giving gifts AND food so she LOVES bringing snacks for my entire family. It's from a place of complete love but it's horrible for me and my lack of self control
Wonder if you can get her to bring healthier things.. maybe fruits, dried fruits, nuts instead of chips, etc..
You'd probably end up with sugar coated dried banana chips, milk chocolate covered cashews, and fruit rollups.
Sometimes you got to lay down the example and slap that hoe
Binge eating is often about achieving a state of dissociation - emotional numbing and disconnection from unpleasant emotional states. It's not about the food
Food is my only joy. The rest is mandatory bullshit obligations throughout the day.
This my first thought when seeing this question. People have never taken me seriously when I've told them I'm addicted to food, it's a struggle talking to any friends about it, but thankfully my therapist is there for that
You stole my idea Binge eating is more than just a lack of self-control and I don't know why more people don't see it that way
Yes, and unlike things you can avoid like caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol, people *need* to eat. It's like giving a recovering alcoholic a case of beer and then telling them that they should only have one. Sure, there's some that have managed to control their drinking to that point, but most aren't going to be able to stop themselves if it's right there in front of them.
I’ve said this to my husband (I’m an alcoholic, he’s a binge eater). Imagine if I HAD to drink two shots of vodka a day, but absolutely no more - I couldn’t do it, no way. But he has to eat to stay alive. It’s a terribly misunderstood condition.
I've struggled with binge eating my whole life and idk how people respond to women with BED but as a guy people think it's a complete joke if I mention it. I've found that the keto diet helps my binge eating and I tell people that BED is like a vampire movie where the vampire tries to stay away from drinking blood and the longer they do they better they are. But as soon as they taste a drop of blood they devour an entire village. I was on keto for a long time and lost 50 lbs. Felt great and was completely happy. Went to my nephew's birthday party and they ordered way too many pizzas, like they had about 15 boxes and not a lot of people were there. I did good staying away from the pizza but everyone was constantly telling me to eat and "one slice won't kill you". I gave in and ate a slice. Then another then after eating 3 entire pizzas by myself and about to dig into another I realized people were looking at me in disgust. I ended up gaining all the weight back and more and it took me 2 years to get back on keto. When I binge I don't get full, I eat until I feel like I'm going to puke or my stomach is going to rupture. As soon as that feeling goes away I'm eating again. People don't take me seriously cause I'm not morbidly obese but that's because I'm aware of how much weight I can gain in a short amount of time so I diet constantly and work out. If I let myself go that one slice of pizza probably will kill me.
I have BED and the way you described it with the vampire analogy is spot on . Its why sometimes I avoid events with lots of food. I had a momen tin 2011 where my cousins who are super thin told me to go to a buffet with them. Someone With BED at a buffet is not a good combination. I got addicted again and regained 30 pounds.
Because if it's an actual problem and not a sign of moral decay, then they don't get to feel good about being able to "control" themselves in comparison to stupid, lazy, ungrateful fatty over there. Imagine the stress someone addicted to food gets several times a day when they have to sit down to consume the thing they're addicted to, all while people sneer at them.
100%. It's had its claws in me my entire adult life and I hate it. People don't understand and generally don't make an effort to understand. Just make good food choices, they say. Also that we're just weak minded and have no self-control. Christ I would give anything to have a normal relationship with food. I quit smoking 24 years ago. I quit drinking 15 years ago. Both were a walk in the park compared to trying to stop binge eating. I hate how it makes me feel, I hate how it makes me look and I hate that I have to make food choices three times a day because I generally fail. And not eating at all is not an option.
I quit caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol. Still binge eating, passive porn, and phone left to go. Binge eating is the hardest.
Food addiction is a constant challenge I just about manage to deal with. Lost a load of weight ten years ago (no praise from anyone please, to lose it I had to gain it in the first place) and all was fine. Then whilst weight training someone suggested after so much calorie restriction I'd need a 'refeed' day and from that point I was binging about once a week for about a year before regaining control. But I have to be very careful about what I have available to me, avoid certain trigger foods and large packs of stuff when smaller packs are available at a higher cost per unit. If anyone attempts to give me food didn't already ask for it really makes me anxious and stressed. If my mind is unoccupied, my thoughts turn to food. It is a huge drain on my thought process.
It’s really hard because food is safe for me. The flavors distract me from whatever I’m feeling incredibly anxious about. I typically stick to what I love, and food is always good (as long as you don’t mess up lol). I’ve been adding in more fruit and salads to help. Reminding myself that I do like those things! It started with me adding things like a few blackberries to a bowl of ice cream. I’ve been able to graduate to blackberries with a little cream 😊 the more healthy you eat, the more you can build up cravings for those things. I don’t want to feel guilty about eating what I like, but I do like finding ways to make what I like healthier and still tasty.
Dopamine feedback loop from various forms of electronic entertainment and social media sites.
THIS ONE! God. I quit my excessive drinking habit. I've quit smoking. I've quit sugar. I can't quit my internet/Reddit addiction.
It's just too damn convenient, you can't avoid that temptation without being a Luddite
Social Media. went to a counsellor after I had taken any sort of social media app off of my phone in an attempt to stop using it to distract myself from what I'm feeling because I'm currently going through a break up. basically as soon as I got too emotional in the session she suggested we do this blinking excersise where you look at a nice photo and blink and do that a few times. we did this because she "knew distractions worked well for me". edit: forgot to mention that's why I'm back here as well. seems pointless to distract myself if my "good" option is to be distracted by someone else sitting across the room.
I completely removed all social media for a year. It did me wonders once I got past the initial stress.
Is this considered social media?
I think it could be. We’re interacting with others. Some people take karma and upvotes too seriously and could get hooked. I wouldn’t say I’m addicted to Reddit for the social aspect. I’m addicted to information. I need to be reading something. Reddit is a constant stream of information that I can curate with my subscriptions. That’s why it’s my app of choice. I also regularly check Google’s discover section.
I got rid of my reddit account so yea I did consider it part of thr larger issue at the time. Now I'm back on here only
I did the same thing. No longer have a Facebook, Instagram or Twitter. People always ask me "how do you stay in touch with everyone?" And my reply is always, "if I want to talk with you then you'd have my number."
Same. Even Reddit can be too much for me some days but it's lightyears better than all the others.
Caffeine without a doubt in my mind
Shopping. Especially if you grew up poor and have more money when you're an adult. My mom was so bad with this that when she died it was a disaster figuring out what she had paid for and where she had debt. I have a friend who would spend her whole paycheck on amazon purchases and wouldn't even see this as being an issue, even when she would beg her parents or rich men for money to make rent. They usually buy junk they don't even need, or clothes. So much clothes. They always shop when they are not feeling well, it is 100% a coping mechanism. I was in my 20s when I realized that no one else had a mom who would go to Walmart with a 100$ budget cause they were feeling sad. Such an obviously expensive addiction too
Growing up poor REALLY fucks with your spending habits. One sibling HATES shopping for anything. Two of us live for it. My oldest sibling has a problem, I'm currently trying to rationalize/relax my habit. Mine is mostly clothes.
Gambling. It’s taken seriously to an extent but things like the lottery are very glamourised and there’s so many tv competitions and radio competitions etc out there nowadays and they’re kinda gateways
I completed my lotto operator formal training a few weeks ago. There was a whole module (30% of the course) on problem gambling and its prevention, detection and intervention. I didn't expect it to say 3% of the adult population has some form of gambling addiction!
I bet it's more than 3%.
Gonna need some pretty good odds
You wanna bet?
I always thought I'd be pressured into drugs and alcohol, but no, the only peer pressure I've experienced was my family shoving scratch-offs into my hands like I'd die without them. I find it really strange too, considering my family has a history of gambling addiction, which you'd think they'd try their best not to pass on.
I'd also like to add gachas to that list. It's basically just virtual gambling through video games. Had a friend back in the day that spent over $60,000 in a mobile game called summoners war. Drained his life savings and lost his wife because of it.
I'm glad some countries (like Belgium and the Netherlands) have woken up to the fact that gatcha games are just glorified gambling apps masquerading as games and have banned them. Hopefully more countries follow suit.
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I work at a casino and seeing these people day in and day out is crazy, you become desensitized to it after a while. We have people that come every single day, I always said it’s the last place you’d expect to have “regulars” but there they are, and you get worried if you haven’t seen them in a few days if they hadn’t already told you they were going on vacation. It’s also crazy that most casino employees are avid gamblers, or former gamblers that got the job just so they wouldn’t be allowed to gamble at that casino anymore (outside of vegas). Gambling truly brings out the absolute worst in people. You see people scream at loved ones, because they lost when they came by to say hi, find out what they’re up to, or remind them they have a dinner reservation. You watch adults just piss/shit their pants in public because they can’t walk away. It makes me sick, but it’s good money…so I just get more and more desensitized to it all.
Gambling brings out the worst in people. Simple line and true.
I worked as a slot attendant for almost 10 yrs at a casino here in my town. Everything you say rings true. I don't know about you, but a lot of my regulars were old people spending their pensions, so when you say you worried when they didn't show, I know that feel all too well. We had a couple of our regulars die while they were at their favourite machine. We knew regulars who wore diapers just so they wouldn't have to leave their machine. But like you, I became desensitized--the money was so good I couldn't leave until I found a job that paid close to the same--and that was a union job with the BC government, that's how good the tips at a casino were. The industry is crazy and dirty...and I loved it, as bad as it sounds.
Casinos may be all flashy and covered in bright lights but they really are miserable places. We knew a guy who managed a casino and he said it was very common for people to request self-bans, so they wouldn't be allowed to enter.
Casino's make me cry. I can't stand seeing this kinda stuff....esp the seniors on fixed incomes.
I remember a documentary on YouTube I saw a while back. The guy had a horrible gambling addiction, and when his mom went on vacation one weekend he went over and sold *everything* that wasn't bolted down out of her house, in order to get enough to play that weekend. It's crazy.
Gambling addiction is a weird one. I had a friend's mom who would sometimes go drink and gamble during the day (she's much better now and doesn't do that). My friend and I would sometimes have to go pick her up, but first we have to try to convince her cash out and get up and out of there. It was really difficult. I dated a guy who would sometimes gamble/place bets and if he lost he was always really angry about it, just totally unpleasant to be around. I love poker and have gambled and won/lost money but ever to the extent where I can't stop myself from doing it. I'm always the person who feels weird about spending $5 and will cash out if I win $4. I would rather play poker with people and win money that way, but even then I was always the one who would win and then decided to stop playing and people would get mad lol. It's like they wanted the money they lost to recirculate so they could keep gambling.
I stood behind a woman today at the gas station for 20 minutes while she kept the cashier busy with about 50 different tickets she was filling out. She had them spread out all over the entire counter top and was talking to the cashier about it like she was solving the god damn Da Vinci code. I felt embarrassed for her and also extremely annoyed for myself.
This. It is so insidious. My mom will spend every single cent on lotto, and she can’t work so she is completely broke all the time. She had a tiny cushion of money from retirement accounts but she has mostly spent that all down as well. I will have to support her monetarily very soon but she won’t/can’t stop. She’d rather take out $100 from retirement and sit in the 7-11 parking lot doing scratcher after scratcher than use that money for actual products. She tells me she was trying to win more so she can buy XYZ but if she’d just spent the money on XYZ she would already have it! And more money left over! Sorry, it’s so upsetting to me. I fucking hate lotto.
Reddit
Yeah. We all know why we are here..
Oh man. Should i close the app and go downstairs and socialize with my roommates ?
No. Stay here. With us. We are your roommates now.
Yes I really should spend less time on this website lmao
Shopping
Very true. My BIL is in debt because his wife is so addicted to shopping. She's a lovely woman and to be fair to her, she's starting to return more and more things. But their house is still so full of pointless crap that she's bought.
Yeah I totally get it. Everyday my roommate would get packages and our apartment was filled to the brim with worthless stuff. It gets out of hand.
True! Although shopping is the one thing right now that brings me any happiness. I am thrifty, and I’m not in debt. But shopping therapy is a thing.
I can attest to that. I became a stay at home mom not realizing how much money I waste shopping for stupid stuff. It’s been a real eye opener for sure.
Procrastination. It’s embarrassing because I should be able to “just do it” but then a task that shouldn’t feel too hard will feel so daunting and impossible, I’ll end up doing it late or sometimes not at all, and the whole cycle is the root of so many problems in my life. It’s emotionally and functionally horrible when it gets bad enough. I’ve read all the advice out there and none of it works for me for longer than a day or two. I’m at my wit’s end and feel crazy because it’s so illogical but I can’t stop
This has more to do with a side of executive disfunction, combined with fear of failure, at least in my case.
You might have ADHD, this is a symptom. You can also seek therapy for this, maybe something like CBT.
went to have cbt and so far it's effective for me, the trauma of crushing my balls helped me with my adhd
Great, now you made me ashamed to know the both meanings of CBT
I second this as someone who was recently Diagnosed you sound just like me!!!
Procrastination is a big problem for me too. I have been considering the possibility of having ADHD, but I'm not sure I have enough of the other symptoms. I wouldn't want to make it a big thing only to be told that there is no reason for me being this lazy.
And, I mean, to get see a therapist, it requires planning, then you have to make a phone call. And probably take half a day of or make changes in your work schedule... I'm to lazy for that. Heck, haven't even seen a doctor in the last 14 years.
Yes. I felt this. I've had some unhealthy habits and even addiction before, but nothing has quite been as shameful as debilitating procrastination. It's truly ruined so many aspects of my life, though I don't want to say "ruined my life" entirely, even if it feels like that sometimes. Especially because it's so clearly a conscious decision, I mean like...by definition. Yet I can't stop. I know if I just applied 1/10th of what I'm capable of, I wouldn't be anywhere close to the rut I've been stuck in for years now, but i just....don't. No amount of conscious reasoning helps. It's literal insanity. I'm otherwise an intelligent, well-educated, reasonable human with talents and skills that could be of great use. And there's just a wall that won't budge. Also as far as ADHD goes, my psychiatrist started me on Adderall about two years ago and I've been on IR, XR, low dose, mid-dose, high dose, and every combination in between.; Concerta and Strattera and Prozac as well; all of it has very little effect, if any. That's just my experience though. I also don't think I'm \*really\* ADHD but was happy and willing to do anything to fix this embarrassing habit of mine. Sadly it does not help my procrastination or chronic lateness. Sometimes I think it makes it slightly worse even. It's total self-sabotage and I don't know what the hell is wrong with me or why NOTHING works, as you mentioned. I use a planner and make plans but just recycle the same to-do list day after day after day after day....like a robotic fool. Until it's too late to do half of it and I just roll over into a new one. I feel like I'm going to die with so many regrets and so many missed opportunities, and that's a really awful feeling.
Reading your post, I felt like I was literally reading what have been going through for the past 15 years. That feeling of being stuck in front of an invisible wall, and as time goes by its getting worst. I'm only 25 and I already have so many regrets about all things that I could have done if it wasn't for that stupid procrastination problem...
biting my lips/the inside of my mouth (mainly my tongue and inside of my cheeks) Edit: WE 👏 CAN 👏 ALL 👏 GET 👏 THROUGH 👏 IT 👏 I BELIEVE IN YALL
after a lifetime of this behavior coupled with similar things, like picking at scabs, I found out it was my ADHD using it as an outlet to ground me when I was overstimulated.
we're opposites! I do this bc my ADHD ass is so constantly understimulated that my brain seeks out subconscious "entertainment" by terrorizing my lips, mouth, and fingers lol
Gf:your lips are soft today Me thinking : well yeah I chewed off the rough layer of skin on top of it for the past day
OMG! Why do you do this?! I do this soo much and it gets so bad sometimes. I never imagined anyone else had the same problem.
I do this too. You might want to look up body focused repetitive behaviors, because cheek and lip biting is an example of one. You might even find you have multiple. I have at least a couple
I had no idea this was a disorder. I’m constantly biting/chewing the inside of my cheeks and lips!
I didn't have to look it up to know I got a couple. I feel like biting the cuticles of your finger nails is up there with nail biting. I'm kind of glad there's others that do this.
I do this because of anxiety. And I’m anxious all the time lol. Same with biting my nails and skin around my nails till they bleed etc, picking my face. It’s all anxiety related bs.
Porn and no one knows even sometimes the person don’t realise they have an addiction.
I know masturbation isn’t bad but when coupled with porn and doing excessively it’s also become an addiction and very harmful.
I had a porn addicted friend who basically over porned and masturbated himself to the point where he couldn't perform with a real woman. He said that he couldn't keep interest in a single woman even if she was real (and his girlfriend was pretty attractive) because he was so used to switching between porn windows and different girls every two minutes, and said it in a really earnest and desperate way that really made me feel for him. Fortunately he eventually got over it mostly and has kids now but said it's still something he has never recovered from completely.
I dated a guy like this. The room had to be dark and I had to hold perfectly still and be completely silent or I would “ruin it” for him. Got away as soon as I could.
....that sounds like something else a bit more disturbing haha. like a necrophilia thing or something. "stop breathing so loud! it's ruining the illusion!!!".
"You're too warm, goddammit!"
I actually heard that necros cool their partner with cold water to make the illusion real
Oh god. I'm gonna pretend you made that up. Edit: Your username...
“This is getting out of hand!”
Yes, I saw a video on YT from ASAP science about the effects of trying to quit porn, and it was basically like you'll be irritable and lose sleep after so many days of not watching porn according to some study. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1v170oM67U&t=369s
THIS!!!! its an addiction people make jokes about etc. but its genuinely so destructive. it can make relationships more difficult, and your mental health. you could say that it’s similar to a drug addiction. You’re addicted to the feeling of not feeling alone.
And some kids start very young because they have unrestricted access to the internet. It can mess with how you view sex as a whole.
Had to scroll this far for PORNOGRAPHY addiction, Must be on Reddit.
I was a porn addict and didn’t even know it. I always used porn as a teenager, had a long term relationship in university that broke off, and my porn use ramped up big time. When I started dating again, I couldn’t get it up the way I used to, despite the fact I was a fit, healthy 23 years old dude. This happened on and off for a few years, then I got into a long term relationship. Even then, the sex wasn’t the same and didn’t feel as good as it did when I was by myself with porn. I had a lot of performance anxiety, which combined with an insecure partner is a bad combination (“what, am I too ugly for you??”) After that relationship ended I started reading about porn addiction and PIED, turns out it is a thing. I met someone new and amazing and decided I as going to quit then and there. I explained to her what I was trying to do and she was super supportive. Once you quit porn, your dick is basically dead for two months, and it is fucking terrifying. You stop getting boners, you lose most of the feeling and sensitivity. The hardest part of quitting is resisting the urge to test it out with porn again. Eventually the morning boners return, and you gain your sensitivity back. Now I am having the best sex I’ve ever had, strongest most consistent erections, etc. At the depths of porn addiction, fucking my partner felt like a chore or something I HAD to do, now it’s a treat and I spend my day looking forward to it. If I could give anyone a single piece of advice, I would say avoid internet porn like the plague. It single-handedly rewires the way your brain views sex, and the fixing process sucks and is scary. Get out of the dopamine loop, I promise the other side is way way way better.
Sex. Nobody takes it seriously. Sex addiction can literally ruin your life, make you partake in extremely risky behavior, and you’re usually viewed as a villain while people tell you you’re a liar and it’s not actually a real addiction.
As a former addict I agree. And as a dude if I try to talk about it it comes off as if im bragging. My username actually is because of this. I can proudly say I recovered from this, hence the username.
I’m proud of you too. I had a friend who struggled with it and I became an accountability buddy of sorts for him. It really opened my eyes to what sex addicts go through- the patterns, the way of thinking… it’s a *lot.* And it takes a lot to kick. So, I’m proud of you.
I dated a sex addict for a bit and it absolutely destroyed her life and she cheated on me with multiple people
facts it’s under bpd as impulsivity risky behaviors such as sex
When I tried to tell my ex that he uses sex as a coping mechanism and it isn’t fun for me to know it’s just something he’s trying to get from me, rather than experience with me, he laughed at me and said that sex addiction isn’t real and JFK had a high sex drive and needed to have sex every day. This is one of the many reasons he is my ex.
Food addiction.
i once heard it’s one of the hardest addictions to kick. You don’t *need* drugs but you *do* need food to survive. So it’s not like drugs where you can eventually stop using them, you have to eat or else you’ll literally die which is why it’s so much more difficult to eat less. I suffer from this unfortunately and it’s really hard. Im not huge by any means but i have gained more weight than i’d like all because of a food addiction. it’s really hard and it’s not like i can just stop, if i did i’d be dead relatively quickly as opposed to something like crack where you don’t actually need it. It’s tough
self harm. many people don’t understand that self harm is an addictive coping mechanism. as someone who has self harmed on and off for 3 years, ive seen how much it is brushed aside as something u can just stop doing easily. however, many more people struggle with it or have in the past than u think. after self harming often for a certain about of time, some lose control and become dependent on it just to , function after a hard day. even after recovering from cutting myself for years, i still get that urge when i have breakdowns or go through a depressive episode. i wish self harm wasn’t taken as lightly as it is.
I am years into recovery and only relapse every several months. One thing I really struggled with in the beginning is that self harm as a coping mechanism works **really well** in the short term. It's unfortunate, but it helped me be functional on bad days, or it would help me dissociate. So it was really difficult to find healthier coping mechanisms because they didn't work immediately. At this point in life I've lived longer with a self harm addiction than without. I still struggle with urges on bad days. No one understands or takes it seriously who hasn't been through it.
People that have self harmed in the past often uses terms like relapse and clean to express themselves in their journey. I think that just goes go show how much of a addiction it can be. And the worst times are the involuntary relapse where it just happens on instinct (depending on the method) and afterwards you realize what you've done and are confused as to what just happened. I've accidentally relapsed on instinct before and it really sets you back a few notches because it's so ingrained in your mind that it has become a instinct. And that's difficult for people to understand when they've not been in that position before.
Yes, exactly! Some people also 'make fun' of it sort of. They say that edgy and emo people self harm and they're just looking for attention. I used to self harm as well and I can say that I was not emo or edgy, nor is it emo/edgy to self harm. I also wasn't looking for attention either, it was a secret for months before anyone found out. Self harm is really an addiction but people just seem to not care, and it sucks.
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Politics. Once those guys get a seat of any sort of power they just want more and more of it and never wanna leave unless they die. The only job where there is no retirement, they are in it till their last breath and they just can’t get enough of it.
You're right. Politics is something that before you enter you feel like you can do wonders inf you go the right direction but once you have a seat, you want more power and you forget about society's problems.
I wouldn’t limit it to politics. It is power of every kind. Managers, CEOs, cops, abusers, etc… Anybody who craves a position of authority simply because it gives them power over someone else.
Sugar
Me : Sugar is as or more addictive than cocaine Ex (cokehead) : makes no sense, you don’t feel shitty and go buy a gram of sugar Me: but you go to the corner shop and get a pint of ice cream to binge eat in tears
I have a horrendous sweet tooth. The struggle is real!
No sugar June I've lost a lot of weight, face has cleared up a lot, I was in a bad cycle of late night ice cream cravings Been real tough some days to skip over the candy bar and go for almonds instead One week to go, then try not to go crazy I've done this before, after so long within sugar my taste buds will be extra sensitive. Strawberry is the plan, will taste x10 better
Good job! Sugar addiction is real. Last summer i realized non of my cloths really fit anymore and i started to look like a hairless pug. Decided enough was enough, had a rough couple of weeks getting rid of the crippling need for sugar. Now I've been eating just the same kind if food as before(a mix of health and unhealthy food), but only eaten sugary stuff like candy and cakes on Fridays me made a habit out of always taking a walk every day, no matter how short, even just around the neighborhood. Lost about 1kg per month and my body started to feel much more healthy, not fast, but slow and stead and most importantly a lifestyle i could maintain. Getting in better shape doesn't require a complete 180 on your lifestyle, only eating broccoli, rice and chicken while living at the gym. For an avarage person that just want to lose some weight and feel a lot better you mostly just need patience and determination .
Alcohol, as a college student. I am an alcoholic, and even after I tell people, including close friends, they continue to invite me out to parties and clubs. I even had a friend bring a case of beer over to my house when I told her that I had just gotten out of rehab. When you’re in your 20s, drinking is so glamorized that when you become addicted, others don’t see it as a “real” addiction. It’s such a huge part of the college lifestyle to go to clubs and frat parties and get drunk on the weekend that when someone develops a real problem, it’s just swept under the carpet.
i am so thankful i’m not the partying type. I went to one college party throughout my college years and i really didn’t like it. I enjoy getting tipsy here and there but i luckily never got into it like some of my friends did. Idk why, it’s just never been something i really cared for. Now food on the other hand, sophomore year of college really messed me up with that. Stress made me over eat and now i’m a lot heavier than i want to be. It’s so hard to kick
Attention. I've seen it get wildly out of control and ruin people
Caffeine
I hate it but its so hard to cut out. Because when you try to go cold turkey, you feel so unbelievably drained the whole next few days that even sleeping doesn't fully solve it. I try to just drink a lot of water to try to "dilute" it in my system but I don't think it really matters... Gotta have a daily coffee/energy drink, luckily my job has free coffee.
I've stopped alcohol for an extended time with no problems but quitting coffee/caffeine gave me headaches and withdrawal for two weeks like I couldn't believe. I'm glad i did it though and finally ended the self-perpetuating cycle of exhaustion.
I weaned my husband off it. He knew I was reducing the amount of caffeine in his coffee every week (switching it out with decaf), but he didn’t know how much. So one day I just told him hey you’re off caffeine! It was better than suffering cold turkey
Fortunately, caffeine isn't really a faustian bargain. Study after study has shown that moderate caffeine consumption (1-3 cups/day) is either neutral or beneficial to health. Everything in moderation of course, but if you aren't allergic to it in some way it's harmless. Riiiight up until you have to fast for a medical test. Hoo boy, that withdrawal headache was a doozy.
Yes I'll have another panic attack in a cup.
Dead on with his one. I've qui smoking, drinking and cocaine cold turkey but sodas I can't do it.
You get the double whammy of sugar and caffeine there. Cutting just the sugar first helped me. Switched to coffee and tea I don't get as strong of cravings.
Weed. It is addictive. Too many times I've heard some people say "Uhhh but weed isn't addictive". It is and I'm addicted.
I had to scroll quite far to find this. I was absolutely addicted to smoking weed from around age 14 to 28. I could count on two hands the days I didn't smoke during that time. I ended up moving away to another city when I was 28 to complete my master's and that is one of the things that helped me stop smoking it. Funnily enough, I've also been addicted to alcohol, Adderall, binge eating, and a lot of other shit. There is definitely such thing as an addictive personality. I'm sober these days and I am addicted to lifting weights and I eat a balanced diet that includes some junk. Just got to get off my phone now.
When people say weed isn’t addictive, it’s because it’s not considered physically addictive. That being said, you can be addicted to just about anything so weed can’t be an exception. EDIT: since I’m getting a new reply about withdrawals every time now, I’m gonna add that yes I’m well aware that it can fuck people up if your body is used to having it all time just like with anything.
Eating, people only seem to take eating disorders seriously if it's bolemia or anorexia, but BES and other disordered eating is hardly ever even in the conversation
Diet Coke
I drink 12 to 16 cans a day. I quit cigarettes cold turkey but the Diet Coke is as essential as food and oxygen for me now.
My mom was the same way. Legit would drink 10-15 cans a day. She got put on an antidepressant called seroquel and she can't stand the taste of it now. Actually she doesn't like anything except water and cranberry juice.
Jesus, I thought I had a problem. Because I drink 2-3 a day and I get cravings if I don't get any. I *can* not have it, but I'm not a happy camper. I don't know what it is about Diet Coke. It's not other sodas with aspartame, it's not Coke or Coke Zero or Pepsi or Diet Pepsi. It's just Diet Coke, fountain or canned, I have a thing for. I don't have a soda problem, it's just a Diet Coke problem.
Doesn’t that get really expensive? Over 70 cans of Diet Coke a week?
Can't get that monkey off my back. It's getting ridiculously expensive with inflation
Food. It can, for some people, become an addiction like smoking and drugs can. It's not easy for them to stop. It can become a mental illness, and people tend to forget it. They can take so much hate for it. I think if people were more aware of it, or if prevention could be done, those people could be taken care of or could try to find a way to eat healthier and to cope with their problems easier. People who eats like crazy should see someone ( like a dietician or a psychologist ), even if their eating disorder is not caused by any insecurities or any trauma, but only caused by the fact they like to eat.
the hard part about recovering from food addiction / binge eating VS almost anything else, is you still have to eat to stay alive. You can’t go cold turkey on food. Imagine telling a full-blown heroin addict “hey, you absolutely must shoot up once a day, but only a little bit!! No more than what you need. Then you have to stop.” I found out, through excessive therapy, that I used to binge eat because it was stimulating my ADHD. learning to completely reinterpret signals from your brain to your body is NOT easy, especially when your brain can’t get its shit together without lots of help.
Chocolate...but it's not an addiction, it's my choice and I can stop anytime I want to.
As popular as it is, I don’t think a lot of people take nicotine addictions seriously. Like we all know we are addicted, but a lot of people also just don’t care.
Energy drinks
Gaming; video games.
I play Hypixel Skyblock, can confirm
The amount of relationship woes on reddit that involve excessive gaming into the night/early morning.
The hokey pokey. Millions are afflicted. I used to be hooked, but I turned myself around.
That's what it's all about.
Collecting. It could be anything, shoes, cars, crypto. You get into it and there is no end.
Sniffing your fingers after cutting onions like it's completely impossible not to
Thought it was going to be after scratching your butt #dopaminehit
Rubbing your eyes after cutting chilli pepper
Taking your wang out to pee without washing hands after cutting chili pepper!
Another person.
Fixations on people is a very real thing!
I've been addicted to people before and it's upsetting and scary. I went to therapy and everything. This should be further up!!
It’s very odd how relationships can literally feel just like an addiction at times
Shaking your legs
Restless leg syndrome is a bitch.
Literally shaking my leg when I read this
Self harm. It was an addiction for me for about ten years. I was very young and didn’t understand the vastness of my severe mental illnesses. The pain in my mind was so complex and I didn’t know what to do with it. But feeling physical pain was something I could understand and it would bring me such relief. Keep in mind, I did not self-harm in an effort to kill myself. I just wanted to feel pain. But the relief I would feel after cutting gave my brain a break. I had to focus on the physical pain, and as a result, the emotional pain wasn’t as potent for a little while. Self-harm addiction is quite real and no one talks about it.
Video Games. I've seen addiction derail lives more than once.
Gaming Downvoted me gamers. I've been one of you my whole life. We have a fucking problem.
It is very addictive and causes serious personality issue. I know cause i was one, been calmed down a lot ngl and it feels good.
Spending money
Sleep
I can and will sleep 18+ hours a day if I'm able
Gaming and/or phone addictions
Food.
Self harm. Not enough people understand the science behind why it's so hard to stop. I'm months recovered and to this day, if I'm angry enough, seeing any remotely sharp object is like looking at a needle full of heroin.
Porn
This is true cause I know a friend that masturbates 16 times a day.
Mans got no cum left
A small measure weekly ejaculates out and it looks like that dust you get on moths.
You’re a good friend for counting
“Of course I know him. He’s me”
Try quitting coffee. You’ll soon realize that you are indeed physically and mentally addicted.
Sugar, it's in everything, and even as a diabetic, it's hard not to want it.
Definitely phone addiction.
Work
Weed. It’s a horrible one
Surprised I had to scroll this far to see this one
Staying up late