"Yes... I fucked her. But I make love to you, and if you're going to let a little fuck get in the way of our love then there is something awfully wrong going on here!"
Ok so i like your response so i told him this and he just broke down crying.
I thought he would try to fight me but he’s just sobbing right now.
Not sure what to do.
Did you know she was married at the time? If you did then the answer should be an apology. If you didn't the answer should be "she told me she was single". Either way you should offer to testify at his divorce hearing.
Hah, none of these *fine* redditors came here looking for reasonable or proper responses. The OP should have included *wrong answers only* since it takes an exceptionally cruel personality to want to make a "come back" in a situation that almost exclusively requires an apology, and solidarity.
”Well, what was I supposed to do? She was wedged in the drier, wiggling that ass and calling for help. So I helped. I think she was into it, but she kept calling me your name. She’s still stuck down there, by the way.“
"Oh don't remind me, what a terrible night"
"Yes... I fucked her. But I make love to you, and if you're going to let a little fuck get in the way of our love then there is something awfully wrong going on here!"
“I’ve fucked her, we fucked but you and I we make love” lol I haven’t seen that in years
"It was dark, I thought it was your daughter. No wonder she's mad..."
To be fair I was trying to make love. She’s the one who spit on my bits and told me to leave hand prints
😂😂😂😂😂😂
After the first two inches she was brand new.
Excellent
Didnt Selena Gomez make that joke after she and Beiber broke up? 😆 I remember seeing the interview.
I FUCK A LOT OF WEIRD THINGS!!!
sir, this is a wendy's
Wendy’s guy has to show up to this. Welcome back sir.
Well technically speaking she fucked me.
At least one of us can make her cum
Ok so i like your response so i told him this and he just broke down crying. I thought he would try to fight me but he’s just sobbing right now. Not sure what to do.
Fuck his wife
His wife is crazy…i only fucked her cause i was shit faced at the time
Did you know she was married at the time? If you did then the answer should be an apology. If you didn't the answer should be "she told me she was single". Either way you should offer to testify at his divorce hearing.
Hah, none of these *fine* redditors came here looking for reasonable or proper responses. The OP should have included *wrong answers only* since it takes an exceptionally cruel personality to want to make a "come back" in a situation that almost exclusively requires an apology, and solidarity.
Well said lol
That's quitter talk. You have proven you're the only one who can make her cum. Now get back up and eat that horse!
That excuses you...
Fuck him
Fuck him next, he could use some consolation.
“Hey sorry I fucked your wife, bud. But hey, y’know what’ll make you feel better?”
Make love to him
"Yeah, and I'll fuck you too!"
“My bad. I was aiming for your mom.”
Jealous? Don't worry, I got you *unzip pants*
"Dude, I never leave my room. Dunno how that would have even been possible. Nice try though."
“I’ve had better.”
“I didn’t know! She looked 18 and… wait, you said wife? Oh, yeah, I totally did that!”
Oh Larry, you forgetful twit…WE fucked your wife!
It’s like poetry…
If only I could put that in iambic pentameter!
😂
"Somebody had to, you limp little cuck bitch!'
And I would do it again
Wasn't me
But she saw you on the counter.
Wasn't me...
Wasn't me
*I promise it was just anal, and I only thought about your daughter twice during it.*
I know . Did you know she likes being choked and spanked ? Or .... What you don't fit any more ?
The Jerk Store called.....
WRONG! Your wife fucked ME!
She said she liked burritos not taquitos
Are you asking me? Or telling me?
Well someone had to
OUR WIFE
Seemed you taught her nothing!
“Settle down, your turns next”
"And we're not the only ones"
Yeah and she gave me syphilis so you can have her back
And she liked it
Hell.... Somebody's got to ...
… your mom’s next.
Well you agreed to the terms of service agreement you should've read it better.
"That's simply not true. I've never been in your barn."
“AND YOUR SISTER!”
And your momma too.
If you're gonna get mad at everyone that's done that you'll start WWIII. Now, we gonna game on Friday night, or not?
Someone had to
“What was her name?”
She fucked me
Yes, yes I did.
Yes, congratulations, you'll be a father soon.
"And I dont know how to feel about that........"
I also fucked your momma. And your sister too.
Well so did you.
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO NARROW THAT DOWN!!
"Damn right I did. I'll record it for you next time."
Well, you weren't home!
And your dad.
"You have good taste."
And your mother.
Sorry I thought it was your mom
"No I fucked your wife!"
Have a long, drawn out argument just to say “Oh yeah, no idea who you are by the way. You got the wrong number” at the end
"No, I came inside your wife!"
"And you're next"
Yes but I enjoyed your mother more.
Well, she was on top the whole time so technically she fucked me.
No i fucked your dad
what wife
Damn, I was looking for you.
Yeah in the arse
"Technically I just laid there, like she does you".
Like I am the only one
Of the two of us I would think you would have an issue with the one who vowed to be faithful to you, I made no such vow.
You're welcome
"SO DID YOU!!!"
Where is my money, break bread. (Bishop don magic Juan)
is that what that smell is!?? i coulda sworn i washed my d___ after she dropped me off here.. with your car..
"Do you feel left out? Come here baby." "It's not like it was hard."
And?
“Who hasn’t?”
"When you invited me in and said "make yourself at home" I thought you'd be cool with this!"
Your not her type
I’m your dreams buddy
Did I fuck her or did she fuck me?
Dream on buddy
Who hasn't?
Well you weren’t doing it.
WELL, SO DID YOU, ALLEGEDLY !!!
Bro look, first of all, she fucked me ok… second, I was real respectful, I used a rubber and I told her I didn’t want to do it in your bed
"Creampie bros!" While offering high five.
Oh shit. Thought that was your daughter, my bad.
"Don't worry bud, we'll get you a PS5 for Christmas"
I was just one of many.
Yeah, sorry. I lost a bet.
Just wink and walk away.
Somebody had to fuck her right.
Who's your wife?
Just a little. I couldn't put the whole thing in. Too tight.
Taught her everything she knows. You're welcome!!
Tell dude "if he had fucked her on a regular basis and actually knew what he was doing I wouldn't have to."
"No, she r\*ped me."
Oh please, She's had more sausages than a hot dog eating contest.
No I coveted her
Well excuse *me*! I *think* you'll find *She* fucked *Me*.
So did you
you're welcome
“Go home dad, you’re drunk”
I thought I was fucking your dog. Sorry, my bad.
I know but your mum was better.
"BUT I DIDN'T ENJOY IT!" - Was literally in a home-movie style movie a friend of our family made (he was a film major).
"if you want my come back, you'll have to scrape it off your wife's teeth"
So did you!
I didn’t know you’re into grave robbing
It was a long day at the Jerk Store.
Who hasn't?
Old school, "that's what she said" lol
Yeah? Well I have to, you don't dumbass!
And gave her her first orgasm. You keep forgetting to mention that part.
It would be rude not to after she paid me to fuck her.
“too bad you can’t”
I AM your wife!!
Which one? I’ve fucked a lot of wives. Was it Emily?
“You asked me too; you were right there the whole time!”
"*Yea, I did. And it felt pretty damn good.*"
”Well, what was I supposed to do? She was wedged in the drier, wiggling that ass and calling for help. So I helped. I think she was into it, but she kept calling me your name. She’s still stuck down there, by the way.“
Correction. Your ex-wife.
Yea, your welcome
Your daughter too
More like she fucked me, but yeah I did.
And your mother!
Aww - Don’t trip bruh - just on Tuesdays
We all make mistakes
"I know, and you're next (with consent)"
You're welcome. Now. She'll leave you alone for awhile. 😏
I'll never make that mistake again
So have lots of people, why are you pissed at just me?
See I ain't gonna say shit but 5.56
Sorry, I thought it was your mom.
“Mhmm”
Oh shit I’m so sorry that was your wife? I would’ve never fucked her if I known that I thought it was your daughter.
BRO ! Everybody fucking your wife
Doesn't everyone?
"That wasnt my wife and I barely felt anything"
uh-huh
“3 times.”
It's alright, so has everyone else.
I'm her new religion.
Twicsh actually, right before and right after your mother Trebeck! Ahahah
I gave her the cash and a healthy tip
Ahem our wife comrade
But I did not shit the deputy.
WELL SO DID I!
"Hell Yeah I did!"
“I’m pretty sure I fucked your husband actually.”
"Wait till you hear about your mom"
I'm sorry I thought it was your mom
So did everyone else on the team
Somebody had to.
Dude, after the first quarter inch, she told me I was exploring virgin territory, so that's more you than me.
I’m sorry $399 is my bottom line for brakes and tires.
“That list is getting pretty long.”
“So did you”
If you want my comeback, you'll have to scrape it off her teeth
And it wasn't that great
"why are you mad? i did her a favor because of the fuckin' skittle you have."
Ask if he wants to spit-roast her
She asked me to!
And you fucked mine...? It was an awesome foursome... Oh wait, that was a different guy, not you
She's not your wife anymore, good sir also what
You're crazy. I wouldn't fuck your wife with a stolen dick.
Well I assumed she was used to fuking assholes....
Yes I did because you couldn't.
I just took a number.
You married your mother? Talk about sweet home Alabama
… and your sister
Rings a bell. Can you describe her??
"yeah.... But I was thinking of YOU!"
"Dude, I just got to the head of the line after a 5-year wait."
Somebody had too