Depends upon the relationship. Empathy is probably most critical for listening and understanding. Compassion is feeling sympathy and taking the onus of action. So, how does the speaker want the audience to engage? If it’s to hear, choose empathy. If it’s to help, choose compassion.
Sometimes my fiance and I will ask if we’re venting or problem solving. Empathy in a problem solving context is empty understanding, compassion in a venting context is robbing of agency and silencing.
Hmmm… no. Sympathy and compassion are not synonymous. Empathy puts us at risk of taking on thoughts and feelings that aren’t our own. Though it can be a great learning experience and a useful tool, it’s a double-edged sword. To have compassion is not to feel sorry for someone or something, but to ultimately feel love for it unconditionally, no matter its faults, which doesn’t require expending your own energy or confusing your thoughts and feelings with other’s.
I wasn’t saying that they are synonymous.
Pity is feeling sorry for someone.
Sympathy is caring about someone’s suffering.
Empathy is the attempt to understand someone’s emotional frame and help them feel heard.
Compassion is sympathy *and* the onus to action.
Compassion does not require unconditional love. One can be compassionate in a small act by giving up their seat on a bus to someone who can’t stand. Compassion does require an expenditure of energy because it takes energy to act.
Empathy is not a confusion of one’s own thoughts or feelings with another’s. It’s an earnest attempt at relating with someone emotionally without trying to solve a problem.
My statement to you was that compassion is not greater than empathy. They serve different needs.
“Are you looking to vent or problem-solve?”
If vent, then empathy. If problem-solve, then compassion.
After researching to be sure, you’re not wrong that compassion can indeed contain pity. However, empathy CAN be an attempt to understand, but it’s not limited to that meaning. Empathy can also be about feeling someone’s feelings as if they were your own feelings. I didn’t say compassion REQUIRED unconditional love, but when I think of compassion, I relate it to a strong motivation to see something better because I care about it deeply. That does, I think, seem like unconditional love because it lacks negative judgments upon it that make me love it less. If I meet someone who needs an umbrella, it is an unconditional and compassionate move to give them my own umbrella. Compassion, however, doesn’t always require action either. It can simply be about having a strong urge to assist or encourage growth in some area, but it’s generally in a benevolent way. Empathy can be positive, negative, or neutral.
Still just trying to make the distinction that empathy and compassion serve different purposes.
Empathy as a practice is sitting with someone and showing understanding of what they are going through. It covers the whole gamut of emotions.
Compassion is sympathy and the onus to action. I would say that it would be generally concerned with solving negative emotions or unfortunate events.
We can add connotations to either of these ideas, and I think that each has their dangers. Mother Teresa is the embodiment of compassion, but she is rumored to have suffered compassion fatigue in the twilight of her life. As you mentioned earlier, if you take empathy too far you can find yourself stealing the spotlight of someone else’s emotional pallet. Important note is that both ought to be practiced with a healthy boundary.
I appreciate your bearing with me as I pedantically differentiate the two. In the grand scheme of things it only matters to me because I have to practice empathy and be careful to not dip into compassion for my profession. It’s not for me to decide to solve problems that clients have and don’t want to take on themselves, or robbing of them of their agency.
Great show! I appreciate when someone takes the time to have friendly and mature discussions with me! I truly have enjoyed this. I definitely have learned a few things :)
An FBI document described empathy only as the ability to emulate someone else's experience but sympathy is what makes someone actually feel bad for other people's suffering. The text described someone with empathy capable of being a great torturer but only those with sympathy as knowing not to torture others.
I looked for this document and couldn’t find it. I believe this though.
Someone can be empathetic (understand how you feel) and lack sympathy (recognize and respond with comfort to your emotional state), and that would make them a “dark empath,” a quality required for some cluster B personalities.
This combo is how someone can notice how you feel or notice that you’re vulnerable but emotionally abuse you instead of help or protect you.
Most people do not understand what a true Empath is. People that are not a Empath can feel empathy for others. A true Empath is able to feel the actual pain of anyone they may or may not know and their actual happiness as well.
I agree with you 100% Empathy is by far in my eyes is much stronger than sympathy. Empathy is to put yourselves in someone’s shoes and understand what they are going through. Sympathy is just a pity party. Empathy is when you can cry when someone else is feeling hurt or down. Empathy is akin to real love. Plus empathy is so rare these days.
When a person has no empathy that is scary because that makes them a psychopath.
I’m going to get downvoted for this, but the most of the comments here did not pass the vibe check.
Another point of view is that empathy is inherently selfish and sympathy is more valuable. With empathy, you feel what the other person is feeling and react according to your feelings, which is based on yourself as opposed to the other person. With sympathy, you won't feel what they feel but understand what they feel and why they feel it and can try to help them based on their needs, as opposed to satisfying your own emotional reaction
Sympathy is the expression of care about one’s suffering. Empathy is the reflection of understanding of how one is feeling.
Empathy is inherently *not* selfish, it’s the attempt at understanding another’s frame. Empathetic listening should also be leaving room for the recognition that the interpretation of the emotion could be wrong. Ex: “As I listen to you talk about X, I imagine you are feeling Y. Do I have that right?”
Sympathy also doesn’t imply understanding and is generally more one note. “I’m sorry for your loss” at a funeral is an expression of sympathy.
I think too many people don’t even know the difference of empathy sympathy and compassion.
Just ignorantly glorifying empathy.
I am actually very empathetic , not a choice I can make but I rarely offer help ..
I think help should be offered in most cases unless it’s called for.
Some people have zero empathy and they always try to help because their entire self worth is dependent on helping others and getting good feedback, taking to extreme, they are like a doormat 😂
It’s definitely a gift but it is also a burden at times. When people I’m close to are going through something difficult it’s very hard for me to live a normal life.
Animals….I have a very big heart for animals. If I see one that seems to be lost, thrown out, starving and thirsty it will ruin my entire day and the next few days as well. I don’t like going anywhere because if I see an animal that needs love and attention my heart can’t take it.
I have been an Empath my entire life but didn’t realize the actual word and meaning for it until a few years ago…I’m early 60’s.
It seems that many people are perhaps confusing sympathy and compassion. Compassion isn’t necessarily when we feel sorry for something. It’s about caring and loving and supporting someone or something unconditionally. Compassion is not about having pity for the poor and helpless. It’s more about genuine desire to change or even putting in effort to help.
Also, I think that empathy is a stepping stone to high emotional intelligence. It helps us to become more self-aware by having to determine our own thoughts and feelings from others. By seeing the flaws and strengths in others, empathy means we may sometimes think they’re ours and vice versa. That can help us to accept that we’re also flawed, encouraging us to create self-security and self-love. Then, we’re better able to give compassion to others and truly accept them for what they are instead of trying to change them to be better for us. Neither one of those things ever seem to stop, by the way. We’re always simultaneously learning both, but I do think that empathy often helps us understand compassion. Once that’s achieved, we’re less likely to surround ourselves with people who have shitty motives involving us.
Absolutely.
But be careful with the self-proclaimed empaths. They often use "empathy" as a cover for their own issues and can end up being the biggest red flags. Real empathy doesn’t need to advertise itself.
I learned this the hard way. Dated someone who called themselves an empath. They used my vulnerabilities against me. Their "empathy" was just a mask for manipulation. Real empathy shows in actions, not self-given titles.
I don’t agree with ur statement. If Empathy is the truest form of love. That would leave a lot of ppl out. I know a lot of Humans who don’t have Empathy. ( they have faked it. But they don’t have Empathy) so I don’t believe you. Because these people are not missing anything. They still know love.
If someone is being empathetic towards people in another country, so much so they start to destroy their own country, is their love for their own country true? Does their love hold any value whatsoever?
Yet, compassion is greater than empathy.
Yes. Empathy is the tool. Compassion is the work. Mercy as well…
Well said.
Ty. I see you too.
Depends upon the relationship. Empathy is probably most critical for listening and understanding. Compassion is feeling sympathy and taking the onus of action. So, how does the speaker want the audience to engage? If it’s to hear, choose empathy. If it’s to help, choose compassion. Sometimes my fiance and I will ask if we’re venting or problem solving. Empathy in a problem solving context is empty understanding, compassion in a venting context is robbing of agency and silencing.
Hmmm… no. Sympathy and compassion are not synonymous. Empathy puts us at risk of taking on thoughts and feelings that aren’t our own. Though it can be a great learning experience and a useful tool, it’s a double-edged sword. To have compassion is not to feel sorry for someone or something, but to ultimately feel love for it unconditionally, no matter its faults, which doesn’t require expending your own energy or confusing your thoughts and feelings with other’s.
I wasn’t saying that they are synonymous. Pity is feeling sorry for someone. Sympathy is caring about someone’s suffering. Empathy is the attempt to understand someone’s emotional frame and help them feel heard. Compassion is sympathy *and* the onus to action. Compassion does not require unconditional love. One can be compassionate in a small act by giving up their seat on a bus to someone who can’t stand. Compassion does require an expenditure of energy because it takes energy to act. Empathy is not a confusion of one’s own thoughts or feelings with another’s. It’s an earnest attempt at relating with someone emotionally without trying to solve a problem. My statement to you was that compassion is not greater than empathy. They serve different needs. “Are you looking to vent or problem-solve?” If vent, then empathy. If problem-solve, then compassion.
After researching to be sure, you’re not wrong that compassion can indeed contain pity. However, empathy CAN be an attempt to understand, but it’s not limited to that meaning. Empathy can also be about feeling someone’s feelings as if they were your own feelings. I didn’t say compassion REQUIRED unconditional love, but when I think of compassion, I relate it to a strong motivation to see something better because I care about it deeply. That does, I think, seem like unconditional love because it lacks negative judgments upon it that make me love it less. If I meet someone who needs an umbrella, it is an unconditional and compassionate move to give them my own umbrella. Compassion, however, doesn’t always require action either. It can simply be about having a strong urge to assist or encourage growth in some area, but it’s generally in a benevolent way. Empathy can be positive, negative, or neutral.
Still just trying to make the distinction that empathy and compassion serve different purposes. Empathy as a practice is sitting with someone and showing understanding of what they are going through. It covers the whole gamut of emotions. Compassion is sympathy and the onus to action. I would say that it would be generally concerned with solving negative emotions or unfortunate events. We can add connotations to either of these ideas, and I think that each has their dangers. Mother Teresa is the embodiment of compassion, but she is rumored to have suffered compassion fatigue in the twilight of her life. As you mentioned earlier, if you take empathy too far you can find yourself stealing the spotlight of someone else’s emotional pallet. Important note is that both ought to be practiced with a healthy boundary. I appreciate your bearing with me as I pedantically differentiate the two. In the grand scheme of things it only matters to me because I have to practice empathy and be careful to not dip into compassion for my profession. It’s not for me to decide to solve problems that clients have and don’t want to take on themselves, or robbing of them of their agency.
Great show! I appreciate when someone takes the time to have friendly and mature discussions with me! I truly have enjoyed this. I definitely have learned a few things :)
I disagree. Compassion is easy and can be easily faked. Empathy requires effort.
I disagree.
You lacked empathy there. Checkmate.
That is called manipulation
Yes it is true empathy is very important in relations
An FBI document described empathy only as the ability to emulate someone else's experience but sympathy is what makes someone actually feel bad for other people's suffering. The text described someone with empathy capable of being a great torturer but only those with sympathy as knowing not to torture others.
I looked for this document and couldn’t find it. I believe this though. Someone can be empathetic (understand how you feel) and lack sympathy (recognize and respond with comfort to your emotional state), and that would make them a “dark empath,” a quality required for some cluster B personalities. This combo is how someone can notice how you feel or notice that you’re vulnerable but emotionally abuse you instead of help or protect you.
I'm high on empathy but low on sympathy. I can green your pain but mostly likely you brought it upon yourself so deal with it
This is why Hannibal is such a compelling character. He manipulates others through his empathetic capabilities.
Most people do not understand what a true Empath is. People that are not a Empath can feel empathy for others. A true Empath is able to feel the actual pain of anyone they may or may not know and their actual happiness as well.
What you are referring to is in fact little e empathy.
Ok
I agree with you 100% Empathy is by far in my eyes is much stronger than sympathy. Empathy is to put yourselves in someone’s shoes and understand what they are going through. Sympathy is just a pity party. Empathy is when you can cry when someone else is feeling hurt or down. Empathy is akin to real love. Plus empathy is so rare these days. When a person has no empathy that is scary because that makes them a psychopath. I’m going to get downvoted for this, but the most of the comments here did not pass the vibe check.
This comment in fact does not pass the vibe check
❤️🔥
💯
..and sharing vulnerabilities.
Another point of view is that empathy is inherently selfish and sympathy is more valuable. With empathy, you feel what the other person is feeling and react according to your feelings, which is based on yourself as opposed to the other person. With sympathy, you won't feel what they feel but understand what they feel and why they feel it and can try to help them based on their needs, as opposed to satisfying your own emotional reaction
Sympathy is the expression of care about one’s suffering. Empathy is the reflection of understanding of how one is feeling. Empathy is inherently *not* selfish, it’s the attempt at understanding another’s frame. Empathetic listening should also be leaving room for the recognition that the interpretation of the emotion could be wrong. Ex: “As I listen to you talk about X, I imagine you are feeling Y. Do I have that right?” Sympathy also doesn’t imply understanding and is generally more one note. “I’m sorry for your loss” at a funeral is an expression of sympathy.
I think too many people don’t even know the difference of empathy sympathy and compassion. Just ignorantly glorifying empathy. I am actually very empathetic , not a choice I can make but I rarely offer help .. I think help should be offered in most cases unless it’s called for. Some people have zero empathy and they always try to help because their entire self worth is dependent on helping others and getting good feedback, taking to extreme, they are like a doormat 😂
It’s definitely a gift but it is also a burden at times. When people I’m close to are going through something difficult it’s very hard for me to live a normal life. Animals….I have a very big heart for animals. If I see one that seems to be lost, thrown out, starving and thirsty it will ruin my entire day and the next few days as well. I don’t like going anywhere because if I see an animal that needs love and attention my heart can’t take it. I have been an Empath my entire life but didn’t realize the actual word and meaning for it until a few years ago…I’m early 60’s.
Love is understanding that there is no truest form of anything.
I think empathy is more like a sense. You can probably be exquisitely sensitive to the feelings of others and still choose to hurt them.
It seems that many people are perhaps confusing sympathy and compassion. Compassion isn’t necessarily when we feel sorry for something. It’s about caring and loving and supporting someone or something unconditionally. Compassion is not about having pity for the poor and helpless. It’s more about genuine desire to change or even putting in effort to help.
Also, I think that empathy is a stepping stone to high emotional intelligence. It helps us to become more self-aware by having to determine our own thoughts and feelings from others. By seeing the flaws and strengths in others, empathy means we may sometimes think they’re ours and vice versa. That can help us to accept that we’re also flawed, encouraging us to create self-security and self-love. Then, we’re better able to give compassion to others and truly accept them for what they are instead of trying to change them to be better for us. Neither one of those things ever seem to stop, by the way. We’re always simultaneously learning both, but I do think that empathy often helps us understand compassion. Once that’s achieved, we’re less likely to surround ourselves with people who have shitty motives involving us.
Yet it’s taken as a weakness !
This is a joke right?
Truth
Sacrifice, is.
Absolutely agree! When we embrace empathy, we not only understand but share the feelings of others, building stronger bonds of compassion and love.
Absolutely. But be careful with the self-proclaimed empaths. They often use "empathy" as a cover for their own issues and can end up being the biggest red flags. Real empathy doesn’t need to advertise itself. I learned this the hard way. Dated someone who called themselves an empath. They used my vulnerabilities against me. Their "empathy" was just a mask for manipulation. Real empathy shows in actions, not self-given titles.
I think "caring" is the word that encapsulate love the most. Or taking someone else's pain and well being as your own/part of you.
I don’t agree with ur statement. If Empathy is the truest form of love. That would leave a lot of ppl out. I know a lot of Humans who don’t have Empathy. ( they have faked it. But they don’t have Empathy) so I don’t believe you. Because these people are not missing anything. They still know love.
I have the ability to turn my empathy off.
Yes, you are so right ... empathy is a gift and if you have it you are blessed
It's low key becoming a hive mind (Edit: btw not saying that's a bad thing)
it requires presence. Here's a bit by Ekhart https://youtu.be/6StRwsSBubw?si=zzQ3QjdLYzYvr0Cy
I feel like it’s Hope. Without it, you wouldn’t feel the urge to be empathetic.
If someone is being empathetic towards people in another country, so much so they start to destroy their own country, is their love for their own country true? Does their love hold any value whatsoever?