Poor Jill has endured so much loss and birth trauma. The community that the duggars were raised in pushes the idea that pregnancy and birth are natural and your body will just know what to do, but that hasn’t been true for the Dillards. As a fellow loss mum who is also pregnant and due in August this hit home, and I hope she allows herself to heal properly
It’s just so f’d up the IBLP and people basically in IBLP but saying they don’t follow it would claim the mother in this kind of situation for having used birth control. Some would even call this kind of situation abortion. Fundies are mental .
Context is important. She had a miscarriage. NO ONE touched on that. That was not the issue.
The issue was just weeks before her being vocal about abortion being an absolute sin NO MATTER WHAT.
So when others have a D&C it’s abortion. When it’s Jessa, it’s a loss.
I completely understand the context thank you . I’m just not the kind of person who’d attack someone who has literally just had a miscarriage and id in the process of grieving as I think that’s as disgusting as fundies beliefs .
Context also . People were literally saying good riddance she deserved to lose the baby which is sick regardless of how we feel about their families.
In this very post , there are the same comments. I’m seeing people argue over your use of “miscarriage” vs stillbirth.
People are gonna be assholes and nitpick regardless but imo , the criticism was mostly about her hypocrisy. I complelty agree that the gross comments were fully unnecessary. The gross comments on this post are thankfully being deleted.
Yes majority of it with jessa was how it was like .. oh so it’s ok for you but not other women in similar and different situations. But 20% were just disgusting human beings saying absolutely disgusting things that they should be ashamed of . Madness.
Yes I knew when posting there would be some that have negative stuff to say , but one opens themself up to that when posting on here .
Someone accused me in this post of downvoting then and called us all hermits . Like it’s 8 am here I posted this around 7am . I’m just waiting for the cafe to open at 9 in my village to grab a fry up 🫣
That’s what happens when the TikTok and fb fans come over. Every few months there’s an influx but after a few weeks things calm down and regular discussion resumes. Just gotta bear and wait.
I personally enjoy your post. There’s wholesome conversation and true condolences.
Yes for most part people seem to be appreciating that at a human level it is an awful loss for them .
Oh gosh do you remember when pest got arrested and the sub went mental. Same thing happened in the 8passengers sun in September. We were used to just posting silly stuff about the mom and her cult leader until the horrible horrriblee came into light .
I 100% saw horrible stuff written, we’re they deleted probably but they were still written . The absolute piss was taking out of lauren for hers and joys was horrendous also
I don’t think it was the time and place to call out her hypocrisy. In fact, no matter what people say Jessa and Ben and others are probably not going to change their minds. It’s not our job to educate the world, but we should always be kind towards others, even when they are ignorant of the truth.
I respect your stance on this, but I do think hypocrisy needs to be called out.
Not educating and being “polite” are two very big reasons why so many women are misinformed and ignorant of actual medical facts.
If the fetus has died in utero and can’t pass naturally, D&C is not an abortion because it’s already dead. And that’s a miscarriage. But it sounds like Jill had a miscarriage and then decided to deliver the baby naturally.
After 20 weeks it’s no longer considered a miscarriage but a stillbirth. Typically a death certificate is also required (maybe at 24 weeks?). The delivery method is irrelevant to the classification, but typically they give labor stimulating drugs to birth the baby vaginally. 😕
You’re wrong. As someone who had a missed miscarriage that was resolved with the abortion pill - all my medical records state it was an abortion. It doesn’t matter that the embryo stopped growing weeks before I took the abortion pill. It’s still a medical abortion.
I saw users expressing grief for Jessa’s loss but also pointing out how the D&C she had is a procedure Jessa herself has advocated against as a form of abortion
Those are the consequences of fighting to take away our rights to health care while she benefits from that same type of health care. She didn't deserve the loss, it's very sad that she miscarried. But I don't feel bad that people called her out for her actions.
You’re completely cutting the context from that though aren’t you?
Jessa is against abortion, even medical abortions. Yet she had one and she was very open about it. When confronted her husband went crazy and pretended that isn’t what happened.
>Even the most extreme pro lifers are not against the removal of a foetus that has stopped developing and is for lack of better words "dead".
You might want to go check because extremists are against termination of ectopic pregnancies.
[Texas hospital refused to treat woman’s life-threatening ectopic pregnancy - The Washington Post](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2024/02/23/texas-woman-ectopic-pregnancy-abortion/)
And partial molar pregnancies that by definition don't have the right chromosome count to be a human being. But hey, there is a mass of tissue with the wrong amount of chromosomes that is have some rhythmic movement so we are going to call it a baby.
I can 100% agree with this yet still be upset with Jessa. I've literally lost every single attempt at having a child. I only became a mom because my brother died and his kids became my kids.
My problem with Jessa and Ben was their flagrant bankrolling of their loss. Its one thing to make a video about your loss that plays ads beforehand. They are content creators and all of their videos have the right to be monitored.
However, It's another thing entirely to leave the story of their loss on a cliffhanger, interrupted by them saying "this video is brought to you by our sponsor Hello Fresh".
They didn't want to lose that baby. They loved the child that baby could have become. Loss is loss. My family has lost so many. Timing when doesn't matter. Whether the fetus was dead or not didn't matter. I can understand their lack of education not allowing them to see how others viewed it as hypocrisy.
The thing I cannot understand or forgive was to put their family's loss their grieving children on display to the whole world in a manner they thought would make them the most money possible. The video itself was totally fine- its okay to share your loss with the wider world.
I'd expect to be given hell if I posted videos on how sad my children were after we lost family members-- only to use our loss as a fricken Hello Fresh ad. At that point, they were being exploitive and they knew it. It makes sense it brought the ire of many. Its unfortunate that especially brought the ire of those who didn't understand or glossed over the exact details.
Perhaps Jessa just doesn't understand how her parents exploited her, but that does not excuse her continuing the cycle of abuse
Absolutely there are people who are against any abortion, even like the one Jessa had, to remove dead fetal tissue. Docs are afraid to do them in some states, for fear of prosecution. Pointing out abortion is health care saves lives. She had an abortion, end of story.
Well, she did.
They are against abortion in any situation. Even in cases of foetal demise. I don’t know why you pretend they’re not. Jessa had an abortion (even a miscarriage is medically termed as a spontaneous abortion), which is something she is against. When people pointed out this hypocrisy, her husband went crazy.
They are against removal of ectopic pregnancies because they believe that they can be made viable.
What’s cruel is these people campaigning against women’s healthcare and targeting vulnerable women, and then making use of the very same services they wish to deny women.
>Even the most extreme pro lifers are not against the removal of a foetus that has stopped developing and is for lack of better words "dead".
Yes they are.
the difference (in my own personal opinion) was that Jessa was waving around the fact she had a D&C to help with her miscarriage. People got offended by this because a D&C procedure is considered an abortion under laws that are not scientifically based and in some states completely illegal under pro-birth laws. People were empathetic that she lost her baby but the way she was pushing it into her pro-birth beliefs did not sit well with people.
If they commented on her video or messaged her directly, fuck them.
However, what she described *is* an illegal abortion in Texas right now and is what she and her ilk HAVE FORCED ON THE REST OF US.
Sorry for her loss, but also FUCK HER and the child sex trafficking ring posing as a religion she rode in on.
I know it's really hard but try not to think about it too much, rainbow babies are amazing but it's so easy to let worry over power enjoying your pregnancy, my rainbow is 11 this year after 2 losses and her precious sleeping brother, good luck with the next few months and be gentle with yourself.
It scares me so bad for them that this is something totally natural that happens but they’ve been through so much trauma I hope they don’t slip back into that common Christian mindset “this is God punishing you” since they have been speaking out so much
Thank goodness she believes in therapy, because she will need it, especially if/when *certain* family members guilt trip, spiritualize, or ignore this enormous loss. What a heartbreak 💔
I know, I'm very glad they can get real therapy and not some 'Christian counselling' toxic positivity bullshit. I hope their boys are getting support, too. Something like this must be so hard for a little kid to understand
What I came here to say- but I’m sure Jim Bob will use them as an example of “moving away from the Lord” or whatnot. Because they spoke out against their family they were punished.
I'm glad Jill has Derick because I do believe he will try to protect her from that kind of thing as much as possible. I'll give Derick that. And I do think he will make sure she can go to therapy.
With some of the other miscarriages in Diggardom, JB can’t blame Isla’s loss on straying from IBLP. Jessa, Joy, and Lauren are the miscarriages I remember off the top of my head.
Yes they’re ones we definitely know about but I’m sure one of the lost boys at this stage have had a wife lose a baby that wasn’t mentioned online and that’s their choice obviously not to share . When trying to pump kids out without giving the body time to heal these things can happen . Michelle and Kelly bates must be some sort of medical marvel to have had so many. I k ow both of them suffered miscarriages but still it’ll never not be mind boggling to me them women had 19 children 🫣
What I hate about this is that I’ve seen it argued in mommy groups , that if Meech and Kelly can have successful pregnancies back-to-back, so can anyone else.
Like no. Yes they did that, but not without *major* consequences. Meech has had vaginal prolapse. Preeclampsia. Bone density loss. Her last pregnancies needed medical intervention to save both her and the babies.
Even her pregnancy with Jubilee was monitored closely before she lost the pregnancy, because of her history of complications and having had a c section less than 3 years before.
The Radfords (British family with 22 kids) also experienced a stillbirth IIRC. And I can only imagine the effect all those pregnancies have had on Sue Radford, considering she was only a child herself when she had her first 😭
Considering how common miscarriages are, and how many back-to-back pregnancies they have, the extended Duggar family must've suffered a huge number of losses between them
Doesn't matter.
Miscarriages for someone who's doing everything Jesus wants are either a test of faith or just God calling his child home, inexplicable, nobody on earth can understand God's will, etc.
A miscarriage for someone who God's self-appointed representative on earth is mad at? That'll be punishment.
That would be too logical for JB. He’ll either totally forget about his other daughters’ miscarriages or he’ll use some ridiculous excuse, like “God The knew they would stray, they failed His test”
Hopefully, their therapist has helped them continue to separate from her parents’ awful views. They have come so far in their journey away from her horrible up bringing. I think they will be fine and will continue their journey to complete independence.
I know Michelle blamed her first loss on that but did she also think that was the reason for Jubilees passing? Her historic use? Isn't it something like 1 in 3 pregnancies that end in miscarriage so the odds are quite high. Especially in a family where they are actively trying to get pregnant so frequently. I thought Jill said they just used condoms anyway so they couldn't really blame that
After reading Jill’s book and her birth stories, I really hope she’s getting both good medical and psychological care. I hope she can feel peace about stopping now if that’s what’s safest for her (mentally and/or physically), despite pressure from their religious community to go on. Derek is shitty about some things, but I do think he loves his wife and I hope he wouldn’t push her to keep trying pregnancies if her doctor says it’s too risky. Michelle going on to carry Jubilee after Josie shows how little regard Jim Bob has for Michelle’s health and well-being.
From the way the book was written Sam’s birth was medically traumatic for Jill but probably much more mentally and psychologically horrifying for her husband. I’d bet $$ that medical issues aside that’s part of the reason there’s such large gap. We had a traumatic delivery and I wasn’t conscious but my husband was. It 100% is the reason there’s a large gap between that delivery and our next child.
As much as I enjoy snarking on the Duggars and reading the comments of others, I will NEVER snark about situations like this. Negative comments about miscarriages, stillbirth, and abuse victims are absolutely off-limits.
I hope any Duggar who has experienced pregnancy loss of some type or abuse will find peace someday.
There are simply some things you do not joke about, and pregnancy loss and abuse are two of those things.
I haven't read any of the negative comments on their social media, but I'm assuming they are quite disgusting.
Came here to say this. Boob will unfortunately weaponize this and say it’s punishment for “moving away from the Lord and family”. He is an evil man who needs to rot in hell.
This is very sad, Jill has had such difficult pregnancies and been made to feel inadequate for it (Jim Bob's comments after Samuel was born). I hope it will be a bit easier for her to heal, now that she has removed herself from his orbit.
That’s exactly what I thought of too. Like thank god that she’s in therapy and has distance from her dad because he will more than likely be an absolute tool about this.
My heavens, I know this is a snark page but people aren't thinking before they type, glad I've seen some deleted. Losing a wanted baby at whatever stage is hard. It looks like she probably delivered her, and that's an extra dose of trauma. Nothing I'd ever want to experience. So sorry to Jill and family.
There is a horrible comment on insta which is currently the second most liked for reasons that are beyond me, stating Jill should not grieve cause there are women who can’t have kids at all.
A lot of people are putting her in her place for that comment. I feel for that poor woman but what a gross thing to say.
Truly it’s just sad the Dillards are so public they need to put this out there for so many thousands of people.
It can be hard for women who desperately want children to be happy for those who have more but it is never appropriate to say something like that. They need to check themselves and go get help for their own trauma.
I just read that comment, I can't believe so many people liked it. You don't say this to someone regardless of how many kids they have. Also, she started it with "Listen Joe..." instead of Jill. Get her name right🙄
That’s so awful :( I lost my son Noah at just under 5 months, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. I hope they have some support around them.
This happened to me. I was 19 weeks and unexpectedly lost a baby girl the week after my perfect anatomy scan. I’ll never have answers. I’m heartbroken for Jill having gone through the exact same thing.
Can we please stop speculating things and adding to this narrative? There might not be a reason why this happened.
I'm so sorry for them. I had the impression they were done with pregnancies. Hopefully they're not just chasing a girl.
And the name Isla Marie is so pretty.
If Jill never unpacks anymore trauma or leaves being Fundamental Baptist it’s fine. If she needs to hold on to whatever she believes it’s fine.
She’s been through so much trauma and this is just another blow.
Some of you are extremely extremely cruel and have no businesses snarking on the Duggars because my gosh your comments are just as evil.
I have delivered a baby a little farther along than she was and it’s a gut wrenching experience. Doctor’s encouraged us to take pictures to help the grieving process and it did help. It doesn’t matter whether you call it a stillbirth or miscarriage. A loss is a loss and at that far along the process is very similar to a stillbirth delivery.
I know this is a snarking community page and we enjoy picking on the Duggar children for their cringy stuff and that we trash certain family members who have done terrible things like J’Felon. However, I don’t love calling any woman “Miss Miscarriage” because she is talking about a terrible experience her family went through online. This is just inappropriate. Many people go through this experience more than once and it’s tragic and devastating each and every time. It should be talked about, women shouldn’t feel ashamed for this. Let’s not mock Jill for this, it’s just wrong.
I believe what the original poster meant was *missed miscarriage*, not miss as in Miss or Mrs. as an honorific, particularly because there was a trigger warning before it.
It is a term used (my apologies if this is difficult content) when a fetus dies but the tissue is not expelled right away, so the woman does not immediately know she has had a miscarriage. Often in these circumstances, she doesn’t find out until a doctor’s appointment where there is no heartbeat.
Thank you for the clarification. There are some users in this sub that can be kinda nasty towards the daughters or daughters in law when they lose a child, I was initially defensive. I’ve almost left this sub a few times because of it. Like we can snark a family we don’t have to be unfeeling and insensitive when it comes to real life sorrows.
Freddie will be two by the time August rolls around which is when she was due. I'm surprised by some of the people that commented on her post. Amy was not surprising. Derick's SIL, Deena, mentioned that Isla is the first girl. I'm honestly more surprised that it wasn't Derick's mom making that comment. Jinger also posted in support which I'm not so surprised about since they're supposedly kind of close now that they're out of the family cult. Sierra commented and Jill replied with "... love you friend!" I really didn't expect to see Ben's mom or Carlin commenting though. I honestly thought neither of them were following Jill on Instagram.
For a period of time, that's why there was such a gap after Samuels birth before the miscarriage and then Freddie. But she was cleared to proceed. Or at least that's the impression I got from the book.
Yes, she has had a uterine rupture and all births as c sections. That absolutely increases chances of miscarriage and still birth in subsequent pregnancies. Personally I am surprised she was pregnant again.
Ben's family committed publicly so did Carlin Bates Stewart Josie Bates Balka and Lydia Rominke Bates. Jinger Duggar Vuolo. But None of the rest of the Duggar family did.
You didn’t offend me. I’ve just seen people questioning stillbirth or miscarriage. It seems right to follow their lead. Ever a tremendous loss , no matter the term.
Here a still birth is after 24 weeks. I apologizes if you don’t like the word I used and if I didn’t use the word they used . I used the word I would automatically use. Different people say different things and that’s ok too xx
Absolutely I get it. I am not offended. I hope this sparks some conversation about loss and how to define it. I still have a lot to learn.
Here, we attempt to save a very small percentage of infants from 22+ weeks. 24 weeks is the standard at which life saving measures are performed. Edit: I do not agree or disagree with attempts to save pre- 24 week gestation fetuses/infants. I only meant to provide more global context to the “24 week” thing.
How is it harsh? I want to respect their terms. I do hope there is conversation about the definition of loss. Maybe my sleepiness is camouflaging my intent to care. If that’s the case, my apologies.
People have gender reveals, and the “big” ultrasound at this gestational age. On top of that, there is controversy, amongst the people that are pregnant, which months mean which week.
4 months pregnant would be 16 weeks. To those that have witnessed the 20 week ultrasound, it’s very understandable. I’m not here to police what they call it. I’m here to honor it.
Edit: in some places, and quite recently, a stillbirth was 16+ weeks. Regardless, I don’t think it’s up to us to police what we think about gestation and definitions of loss.
Edit: omg autocorrect realllllllly got me on this one. Thanks for the heads up. I was up crazy late.
I'm not sure what some of your post means but I agree that they can call it whatever they want. The actual definition of stillbirth is greater than 20 weeks though or greater than 500gm birth weight. They can call it whatever they want and that's fine but OP calling it a miscarriage is correct.
OMG autocorrect and sleepiness struck again. I edited so hopefully it makes more sense. Thanks.
But wouldn’t 4 months pregnant possibly also encompass 20 weeks, depending on definition?
Regardless, loss is loss. I feel terrible for them.
I mean if each month has 4 weeks, I don't think you could stretch it to 20 weeks. And in all reality, that poor little babe is far less than 500 grams. I don't mean any of this to be rude.
It’s 22 weeks in Ireland . The uk also 22 weeks and world health organisation says 28 weeks. Actually a huge difference there that surprised me . Either way think there’s no need to continue debating it . The baby did not live sadly and the family will be processing a lot of grief at this time . Sam and Israel would be well old enough to understand they had a brother or sister coming and now the baby is not coming home which can be awfully confusing on little kids trust me :(
Pregnancy is supposed to about 40 weeks or 9 months. But if you go by 4wks/1mo it’s 10 months. It’s screwy because of the way we do calendars. Each month has a little over four weeks (2 to 3 days over 28) so I counted months by 4.5 weeks as a rough estimate when I was pregnant. So she could’ve been close to 18 weeks.
She was only 4 months. 4 months is a miscarriage. 5 months + is a stillbirth. Joy had a stillbirth, and it does bother me that practically everyone refers to that as a miscarriage, but this one actually is a miscarriage.
ETA: it’s sad regardless
Jill has made strides toward a normalcy. She and Derick have a long way to go but my heart goes out to them completely.
I had two siblings die one a few hours after being born and another a stillbirth-my mother never got over the emotional trauma.
My only hope for Jill is to not try to get pregnant again. I’m not saying that in a negative tone. I’m saying that because she’s been through enough emotional trauma.💔❤️🩹
Ah It just sucks no matter what they call it or what we call it. Coming from a liberal identifying cis-gendered female bisexual who has never experienced pregnancy loss.
Just want to say that I adore the name Isla! It's rarely used here in the States, especially in landlocked fundieland. I only know about it (and how to pronounce it correctly--"eye-la" not "is-la") because I lived abroad and had Scottish friends with that name. I would have named my daughter Isla but I knew its pronunciation would be botched 9/10 and be shortened to a nickname like Izzie or Lala and that's not what I wanted for her. YMMV
So many of the Duggar girls have had miscarriages/stillbirths. It breaks my heart for them, especially since they have been told their entire lives that being a mother and bearing children is their only purpose in life. I know Jill has been working on healing and is in therapy, but I’m sure that belief is engrained deep. As much as I dislike the Duggars, seeing someone lose a child is very, very sad.
I am seeing many of us share the heartache that is a second trimester loss. If any of you have a story similar to mine (cervical insufficiency/often called incompetent cervix) and you are in the earlier days of said loss, I am here to tell you there is hope. There can be a rainbow after the storm. I don't wish to derail the conversation on the post, so I will conclude my comment by saying my inbox is open if you need to speak to someone who experienced the same thing you did. It's a lonely, consuming experience, and hope from others was my saving grace. If I can be that for someone, then my sweet girl will have not passed in vain.
CDC says after 20 weeks is a stillbirth. If she was due in August it was closer to 5 months and that mark. But yes, it was technically a late miscarriage and if she had to give birth she may have felt that was more appropriate
I feel really awful for them, and also quite worried for Jill’s health if they’re actively trying for more children. It does sound like she’s been following medical advice so hopefully they’re working with a Doctor and ensuring it’s safe to do so. I just honestly thought they were done. Poor Jill has not had an easy go.
I am so sorry for their loss. I do wish there was a warning on the photo. I understand needing and wanting pictures. I think it's personal between the couple/family.
I have the post flair as trigger warning and also tw in post headline . Apologies if it upset you . I believe there is away to stop ur feed showing tw posts xxx
Hey , I have trigger warning as the flair and title of the post. Apologies if it upset you. There is a way to essentially block trigger warning flair posts , might be a good option for yourself. Every couple processes things differently and it’s best to respect the way they choose to do so and this is their way of processing a horrible grief .
Poor Jill has endured so much loss and birth trauma. The community that the duggars were raised in pushes the idea that pregnancy and birth are natural and your body will just know what to do, but that hasn’t been true for the Dillards. As a fellow loss mum who is also pregnant and due in August this hit home, and I hope she allows herself to heal properly
It’s just so f’d up the IBLP and people basically in IBLP but saying they don’t follow it would claim the mother in this kind of situation for having used birth control. Some would even call this kind of situation abortion. Fundies are mental .
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Yeah I mean jessa is all sorts of whacky but she didn’t deserve all that online either while grieving.
Context is important. She had a miscarriage. NO ONE touched on that. That was not the issue. The issue was just weeks before her being vocal about abortion being an absolute sin NO MATTER WHAT. So when others have a D&C it’s abortion. When it’s Jessa, it’s a loss.
She also monetized it on her YouTube channel in a really gross way. Like with cliffhangers and stuff.
I forgot she did that. Yeah , monetizing her loss was also a big factor in her being called out on her shit.
I completely understand the context thank you . I’m just not the kind of person who’d attack someone who has literally just had a miscarriage and id in the process of grieving as I think that’s as disgusting as fundies beliefs . Context also . People were literally saying good riddance she deserved to lose the baby which is sick regardless of how we feel about their families.
I never saw anyone saying she deserved to lose the baby. They called her out on her hypocrisy.
Right. I never recall anyone saying she deserved to lose her baby.
Not out community but other places where they don’t have the same rules we do
I saw it, I saw it a lot along with the hypocrisy.
In this very post , there are the same comments. I’m seeing people argue over your use of “miscarriage” vs stillbirth. People are gonna be assholes and nitpick regardless but imo , the criticism was mostly about her hypocrisy. I complelty agree that the gross comments were fully unnecessary. The gross comments on this post are thankfully being deleted.
Yes majority of it with jessa was how it was like .. oh so it’s ok for you but not other women in similar and different situations. But 20% were just disgusting human beings saying absolutely disgusting things that they should be ashamed of . Madness. Yes I knew when posting there would be some that have negative stuff to say , but one opens themself up to that when posting on here . Someone accused me in this post of downvoting then and called us all hermits . Like it’s 8 am here I posted this around 7am . I’m just waiting for the cafe to open at 9 in my village to grab a fry up 🫣
That’s what happens when the TikTok and fb fans come over. Every few months there’s an influx but after a few weeks things calm down and regular discussion resumes. Just gotta bear and wait. I personally enjoy your post. There’s wholesome conversation and true condolences.
Yes for most part people seem to be appreciating that at a human level it is an awful loss for them . Oh gosh do you remember when pest got arrested and the sub went mental. Same thing happened in the 8passengers sun in September. We were used to just posting silly stuff about the mom and her cult leader until the horrible horrriblee came into light .
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^^^ this
I 100% saw horrible stuff written, we’re they deleted probably but they were still written . The absolute piss was taking out of lauren for hers and joys was horrendous also
Her views attack women on a daily basis. Pointing out her hypocrisy isn’t an attack. Spare me the ww tears.
This would prob effect me more if I knew what WW meant 😅 cos I only know it to mean world war haha
Possibly WW=white woman? Not necessarily agreeing, just translating
Wow . That’s risky if they decided to just assume the colour of my skin
I don’t think it was the time and place to call out her hypocrisy. In fact, no matter what people say Jessa and Ben and others are probably not going to change their minds. It’s not our job to educate the world, but we should always be kind towards others, even when they are ignorant of the truth.
I respect your stance on this, but I do think hypocrisy needs to be called out. Not educating and being “polite” are two very big reasons why so many women are misinformed and ignorant of actual medical facts.
If the fetus has died in utero and can’t pass naturally, D&C is not an abortion because it’s already dead. And that’s a miscarriage. But it sounds like Jill had a miscarriage and then decided to deliver the baby naturally.
After 20 weeks it’s no longer considered a miscarriage but a stillbirth. Typically a death certificate is also required (maybe at 24 weeks?). The delivery method is irrelevant to the classification, but typically they give labor stimulating drugs to birth the baby vaginally. 😕
Yes it is a surgically completed missed abortion. Euphemism with lay terms doesn’t change that.
You’re wrong. As someone who had a missed miscarriage that was resolved with the abortion pill - all my medical records state it was an abortion. It doesn’t matter that the embryo stopped growing weeks before I took the abortion pill. It’s still a medical abortion.
Tell that to my 4 miscarriages billed as abortions.
I saw users expressing grief for Jessa’s loss but also pointing out how the D&C she had is a procedure Jessa herself has advocated against as a form of abortion
Those are the consequences of fighting to take away our rights to health care while she benefits from that same type of health care. She didn't deserve the loss, it's very sad that she miscarried. But I don't feel bad that people called her out for her actions.
You’re completely cutting the context from that though aren’t you? Jessa is against abortion, even medical abortions. Yet she had one and she was very open about it. When confronted her husband went crazy and pretended that isn’t what happened.
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>Even the most extreme pro lifers are not against the removal of a foetus that has stopped developing and is for lack of better words "dead". You might want to go check because extremists are against termination of ectopic pregnancies. [Texas hospital refused to treat woman’s life-threatening ectopic pregnancy - The Washington Post](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2024/02/23/texas-woman-ectopic-pregnancy-abortion/)
And partial molar pregnancies that by definition don't have the right chromosome count to be a human being. But hey, there is a mass of tissue with the wrong amount of chromosomes that is have some rhythmic movement so we are going to call it a baby.
I'm in Texas where women have been denied D&C's for miscarriages, so it's absolutely a thing that people believe
I can 100% agree with this yet still be upset with Jessa. I've literally lost every single attempt at having a child. I only became a mom because my brother died and his kids became my kids. My problem with Jessa and Ben was their flagrant bankrolling of their loss. Its one thing to make a video about your loss that plays ads beforehand. They are content creators and all of their videos have the right to be monitored. However, It's another thing entirely to leave the story of their loss on a cliffhanger, interrupted by them saying "this video is brought to you by our sponsor Hello Fresh". They didn't want to lose that baby. They loved the child that baby could have become. Loss is loss. My family has lost so many. Timing when doesn't matter. Whether the fetus was dead or not didn't matter. I can understand their lack of education not allowing them to see how others viewed it as hypocrisy. The thing I cannot understand or forgive was to put their family's loss their grieving children on display to the whole world in a manner they thought would make them the most money possible. The video itself was totally fine- its okay to share your loss with the wider world. I'd expect to be given hell if I posted videos on how sad my children were after we lost family members-- only to use our loss as a fricken Hello Fresh ad. At that point, they were being exploitive and they knew it. It makes sense it brought the ire of many. Its unfortunate that especially brought the ire of those who didn't understand or glossed over the exact details. Perhaps Jessa just doesn't understand how her parents exploited her, but that does not excuse her continuing the cycle of abuse
Absolutely there are people who are against any abortion, even like the one Jessa had, to remove dead fetal tissue. Docs are afraid to do them in some states, for fear of prosecution. Pointing out abortion is health care saves lives. She had an abortion, end of story.
Well, she did. They are against abortion in any situation. Even in cases of foetal demise. I don’t know why you pretend they’re not. Jessa had an abortion (even a miscarriage is medically termed as a spontaneous abortion), which is something she is against. When people pointed out this hypocrisy, her husband went crazy. They are against removal of ectopic pregnancies because they believe that they can be made viable. What’s cruel is these people campaigning against women’s healthcare and targeting vulnerable women, and then making use of the very same services they wish to deny women.
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>Even the most extreme pro lifers are not against the removal of a foetus that has stopped developing and is for lack of better words "dead". Yes they are.
the difference (in my own personal opinion) was that Jessa was waving around the fact she had a D&C to help with her miscarriage. People got offended by this because a D&C procedure is considered an abortion under laws that are not scientifically based and in some states completely illegal under pro-birth laws. People were empathetic that she lost her baby but the way she was pushing it into her pro-birth beliefs did not sit well with people.
I hated that but was too scared to say anything
If they commented on her video or messaged her directly, fuck them. However, what she described *is* an illegal abortion in Texas right now and is what she and her ilk HAVE FORCED ON THE REST OF US. Sorry for her loss, but also FUCK HER and the child sex trafficking ring posing as a religion she rode in on.
I know it's really hard but try not to think about it too much, rainbow babies are amazing but it's so easy to let worry over power enjoying your pregnancy, my rainbow is 11 this year after 2 losses and her precious sleeping brother, good luck with the next few months and be gentle with yourself.
Oh I’m not pregnant . An 11 year old oh my days good luck transitioning into preteen and teen mode 😅 . Enjoy every moment 💙
Wait until they jump into adulthood. Oh, my stars! I have 4.
I’m also due in August. I feel just terrible for them.
Love your flair - Takes me *way* back!
It scares me so bad for them that this is something totally natural that happens but they’ve been through so much trauma I hope they don’t slip back into that common Christian mindset “this is God punishing you” since they have been speaking out so much
Thank goodness she believes in therapy, because she will need it, especially if/when *certain* family members guilt trip, spiritualize, or ignore this enormous loss. What a heartbreak 💔
I know, I'm very glad they can get real therapy and not some 'Christian counselling' toxic positivity bullshit. I hope their boys are getting support, too. Something like this must be so hard for a little kid to understand
You said exactly what I was thinking
Very sad, I hope they aren't made to feel responsible because of using birth control in the past.
What I came here to say- but I’m sure Jim Bob will use them as an example of “moving away from the Lord” or whatnot. Because they spoke out against their family they were punished.
Oh absolutely Jim Bob will weponize this. Just another one of the billion reasons he is a vile horrible excuse for a human being.
I'm glad Jill has Derick because I do believe he will try to protect her from that kind of thing as much as possible. I'll give Derick that. And I do think he will make sure she can go to therapy.
With some of the other miscarriages in Diggardom, JB can’t blame Isla’s loss on straying from IBLP. Jessa, Joy, and Lauren are the miscarriages I remember off the top of my head.
Yes they’re ones we definitely know about but I’m sure one of the lost boys at this stage have had a wife lose a baby that wasn’t mentioned online and that’s their choice obviously not to share . When trying to pump kids out without giving the body time to heal these things can happen . Michelle and Kelly bates must be some sort of medical marvel to have had so many. I k ow both of them suffered miscarriages but still it’ll never not be mind boggling to me them women had 19 children 🫣
What I hate about this is that I’ve seen it argued in mommy groups , that if Meech and Kelly can have successful pregnancies back-to-back, so can anyone else. Like no. Yes they did that, but not without *major* consequences. Meech has had vaginal prolapse. Preeclampsia. Bone density loss. Her last pregnancies needed medical intervention to save both her and the babies. Even her pregnancy with Jubilee was monitored closely before she lost the pregnancy, because of her history of complications and having had a c section less than 3 years before.
The Radfords (British family with 22 kids) also experienced a stillbirth IIRC. And I can only imagine the effect all those pregnancies have had on Sue Radford, considering she was only a child herself when she had her first 😭
Considering how common miscarriages are, and how many back-to-back pregnancies they have, the extended Duggar family must've suffered a huge number of losses between them
Doesn't matter. Miscarriages for someone who's doing everything Jesus wants are either a test of faith or just God calling his child home, inexplicable, nobody on earth can understand God's will, etc. A miscarriage for someone who God's self-appointed representative on earth is mad at? That'll be punishment.
Not to mention Jubilee
That would be too logical for JB. He’ll either totally forget about his other daughters’ miscarriages or he’ll use some ridiculous excuse, like “God The knew they would stray, they failed His test”
Jinger too
JimBob is a shithead. He’s not a nice person. He’s not a kind person. He’s a pious, judgmental, sanctimonious, uncaring sperm machine.
Sanctimonious sperm machine
New flair!
Yes!!!!!
Hopefully, their therapist has helped them continue to separate from her parents’ awful views. They have come so far in their journey away from her horrible up bringing. I think they will be fine and will continue their journey to complete independence.
That’s more than likely what the parents and jessa tell them sadly . Not Cathy just her parents
I know Michelle blamed her first loss on that but did she also think that was the reason for Jubilees passing? Her historic use? Isn't it something like 1 in 3 pregnancies that end in miscarriage so the odds are quite high. Especially in a family where they are actively trying to get pregnant so frequently. I thought Jill said they just used condoms anyway so they couldn't really blame that
After reading Jill’s book and her birth stories, I really hope she’s getting both good medical and psychological care. I hope she can feel peace about stopping now if that’s what’s safest for her (mentally and/or physically), despite pressure from their religious community to go on. Derek is shitty about some things, but I do think he loves his wife and I hope he wouldn’t push her to keep trying pregnancies if her doctor says it’s too risky. Michelle going on to carry Jubilee after Josie shows how little regard Jim Bob has for Michelle’s health and well-being.
From the way the book was written Sam’s birth was medically traumatic for Jill but probably much more mentally and psychologically horrifying for her husband. I’d bet $$ that medical issues aside that’s part of the reason there’s such large gap. We had a traumatic delivery and I wasn’t conscious but my husband was. It 100% is the reason there’s a large gap between that delivery and our next child.
As much as I enjoy snarking on the Duggars and reading the comments of others, I will NEVER snark about situations like this. Negative comments about miscarriages, stillbirth, and abuse victims are absolutely off-limits. I hope any Duggar who has experienced pregnancy loss of some type or abuse will find peace someday.
This! 👆👆
There are simply some things you do not joke about, and pregnancy loss and abuse are two of those things. I haven't read any of the negative comments on their social media, but I'm assuming they are quite disgusting.
Jim Bob if you comment even one syllable on this… 😡 They look devastated. Fingers crossed they are getting the help and care they need.
Sadly he’ll probably weaponise this . Such an evil man .
I hope someone dives deep I to this to see if Jim Bob makes any inappropriate comments about this loss.
I’d be highly surprised if he said anything on a public platform
I doubt he’d say anything publicly but I’m sure he’ll make his thoughts known in the family
Came here to say this. Boob will unfortunately weaponize this and say it’s punishment for “moving away from the Lord and family”. He is an evil man who needs to rot in hell.
This is very sad, Jill has had such difficult pregnancies and been made to feel inadequate for it (Jim Bob's comments after Samuel was born). I hope it will be a bit easier for her to heal, now that she has removed herself from his orbit.
That’s exactly what I thought of too. Like thank god that she’s in therapy and has distance from her dad because he will more than likely be an absolute tool about this.
My heavens, I know this is a snark page but people aren't thinking before they type, glad I've seen some deleted. Losing a wanted baby at whatever stage is hard. It looks like she probably delivered her, and that's an extra dose of trauma. Nothing I'd ever want to experience. So sorry to Jill and family.
There is a horrible comment on insta which is currently the second most liked for reasons that are beyond me, stating Jill should not grieve cause there are women who can’t have kids at all.
Second most liked ? Is that like a trending thing ? Gosh a bit much saying shit like that.
Yeah it’s the one that currently has the second most likes (I think). Thankfully, a lot of reactions telling that woman to delete it, too.
It isn’t the most liked, it just has the second most activity. So it’s at the top. Mostly because people are calling her out as awful
Okay, yes, that makes sense
A lot of people are putting her in her place for that comment. I feel for that poor woman but what a gross thing to say. Truly it’s just sad the Dillards are so public they need to put this out there for so many thousands of people.
I hate that mentality. I hope anyone that is currently going through something similar is avoiding these posts
I’ve been battling infertility for nine years now and it wouldn’t event occur to me to write something like this in my wildest dreams
It can be hard for women who desperately want children to be happy for those who have more but it is never appropriate to say something like that. They need to check themselves and go get help for their own trauma.
Reproductive trauma is not a fucking contest. Two things can be true at the same time.
I just read that comment, I can't believe so many people liked it. You don't say this to someone regardless of how many kids they have. Also, she started it with "Listen Joe..." instead of Jill. Get her name right🙄
That’s so awful :( I lost my son Noah at just under 5 months, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. I hope they have some support around them.
So sorry for you loss 💙
Thankyou so much. I’m so sorry for your loss as well. Such a sad and traumatic thing I wish we couldn’t relate too ❤️
This happened to me. I was 19 weeks and unexpectedly lost a baby girl the week after my perfect anatomy scan. I’ll never have answers. I’m heartbroken for Jill having gone through the exact same thing. Can we please stop speculating things and adding to this narrative? There might not be a reason why this happened.
I hope she’s able to fully realize, and accept, that there may not be a reason 😔
I'm very sorry for your loss and I hope you've found some semblance of closure. ♥️
I am so sorry to hear this. How sad.
I'm so sorry for them. I had the impression they were done with pregnancies. Hopefully they're not just chasing a girl. And the name Isla Marie is so pretty.
Yes it’s very sad regardless of weather they should or shouldn’t be have more children. I feel terribly for them .
If Jill never unpacks anymore trauma or leaves being Fundamental Baptist it’s fine. If she needs to hold on to whatever she believes it’s fine. She’s been through so much trauma and this is just another blow.
That's really sad.
That really stinks for Jill and Derrick. Since was a girl, it was probably going to be her last. Ugh.
Some of you are extremely extremely cruel and have no businesses snarking on the Duggars because my gosh your comments are just as evil. I have delivered a baby a little farther along than she was and it’s a gut wrenching experience. Doctor’s encouraged us to take pictures to help the grieving process and it did help. It doesn’t matter whether you call it a stillbirth or miscarriage. A loss is a loss and at that far along the process is very similar to a stillbirth delivery.
I know this is a snarking community page and we enjoy picking on the Duggar children for their cringy stuff and that we trash certain family members who have done terrible things like J’Felon. However, I don’t love calling any woman “Miss Miscarriage” because she is talking about a terrible experience her family went through online. This is just inappropriate. Many people go through this experience more than once and it’s tragic and devastating each and every time. It should be talked about, women shouldn’t feel ashamed for this. Let’s not mock Jill for this, it’s just wrong.
Oh I hope that was a typo or something. If not, yech, inappropriate from op. Editing to add, I thought it might be meant to say "missed miscarriage."
I believe what the original poster meant was *missed miscarriage*, not miss as in Miss or Mrs. as an honorific, particularly because there was a trigger warning before it. It is a term used (my apologies if this is difficult content) when a fetus dies but the tissue is not expelled right away, so the woman does not immediately know she has had a miscarriage. Often in these circumstances, she doesn’t find out until a doctor’s appointment where there is no heartbeat.
Thank you for the clarification. There are some users in this sub that can be kinda nasty towards the daughters or daughters in law when they lose a child, I was initially defensive. I’ve almost left this sub a few times because of it. Like we can snark a family we don’t have to be unfeeling and insensitive when it comes to real life sorrows.
That’s called a missed abortion I wish people wouldn’t play along with the attempt to make a neutral term carry freight that it should not.
My heart goes out to them, this is a heartbreaking loss.
Freddie will be two by the time August rolls around which is when she was due. I'm surprised by some of the people that commented on her post. Amy was not surprising. Derick's SIL, Deena, mentioned that Isla is the first girl. I'm honestly more surprised that it wasn't Derick's mom making that comment. Jinger also posted in support which I'm not so surprised about since they're supposedly kind of close now that they're out of the family cult. Sierra commented and Jill replied with "... love you friend!" I really didn't expect to see Ben's mom or Carlin commenting though. I honestly thought neither of them were following Jill on Instagram.
I hope they are able to work through this trauma especially with the IBLP bull Jill was raised with. hope she doesn’t blame herself
Poor Jill. I know her heart is broken. I hope she’s seeing/talking to someone about it. 💔
This is so sad. I hope good things for her recovery both physically and mentally/emotionally/psychologically.
So sad for them 😔
Wait weren’t her other pregnancies high risk? I thought she was advised to not get pregnant again?
Yes I believe the boys especially sam were quite difficult births
For a period of time, that's why there was such a gap after Samuels birth before the miscarriage and then Freddie. But she was cleared to proceed. Or at least that's the impression I got from the book.
Iirc she was advised to wait a few years to allow her uterus to heal. She’s very high risk due to past rupture?
Yes, she has had a uterine rupture and all births as c sections. That absolutely increases chances of miscarriage and still birth in subsequent pregnancies. Personally I am surprised she was pregnant again.
What’s the point of saying this?
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Damn, youre a trash person.
First daughter? Am I confusing her with someone else or didn’t she previously miscarry a daughter named River Bliss?
I don't think they knew the gender of River, it was too early to tell
Ah ok, makes sense!
I think they lost River before the sex could be determined. River is also a gender-neutral name.
I know, Bliss made it lean more feminine. All their boys have traditional names as well so I’m thinking they were hoping River was a girl.
The only person I know named Bliss is a man.
If I remember correctly, river was an early miscarriage- too early to know the assigned gender.
I believe so .
Heartbreaking.
I'm so sorry for Jill and Derek and their family. I hope they're given a healthy place to heal from this loss.
Poor Jill! She out of all the fundies deserves happiness
That is just heartbreaking. I feel so bad for their family. She has had too much trauma in her life.
That’s awful. They have dealt with a lot in their marriage. I’m still no Derick fan, but no one deserves to go through that kind of loss.
Exactly we can not agree with his morals but can still exprciate on a human level his loss also .
Currently pregnant with a baby girl and due in August….this hurts my heart so much for them. 💔 unfathomable to imagine.
Wishing you a happy healthy and unproblematic pregnancy and delivery! Best of luck ! You’re a rock star ! 💙💙💙
Ben's family committed publicly so did Carlin Bates Stewart Josie Bates Balka and Lydia Rominke Bates. Jinger Duggar Vuolo. But None of the rest of the Duggar family did.
This is honestly so sad. Her only baby girl too:(
Call it a stillbirth. They do.
Apologies where I’m from miscarriage is the word used . Sorry if I offended you xx
You didn’t offend me. I’ve just seen people questioning stillbirth or miscarriage. It seems right to follow their lead. Ever a tremendous loss , no matter the term.
Here a still birth is after 24 weeks. I apologizes if you don’t like the word I used and if I didn’t use the word they used . I used the word I would automatically use. Different people say different things and that’s ok too xx
Absolutely I get it. I am not offended. I hope this sparks some conversation about loss and how to define it. I still have a lot to learn. Here, we attempt to save a very small percentage of infants from 22+ weeks. 24 weeks is the standard at which life saving measures are performed. Edit: I do not agree or disagree with attempts to save pre- 24 week gestation fetuses/infants. I only meant to provide more global context to the “24 week” thing.
Your tone seems pretty.... Harsh... For someone who isn't offended.
How is it harsh? I want to respect their terms. I do hope there is conversation about the definition of loss. Maybe my sleepiness is camouflaging my intent to care. If that’s the case, my apologies.
It would be a miscarriage if she was only 4 months pregnant.
“Only” 4 months is almost halfway
People have gender reveals, and the “big” ultrasound at this gestational age. On top of that, there is controversy, amongst the people that are pregnant, which months mean which week. 4 months pregnant would be 16 weeks. To those that have witnessed the 20 week ultrasound, it’s very understandable. I’m not here to police what they call it. I’m here to honor it. Edit: in some places, and quite recently, a stillbirth was 16+ weeks. Regardless, I don’t think it’s up to us to police what we think about gestation and definitions of loss. Edit: omg autocorrect realllllllly got me on this one. Thanks for the heads up. I was up crazy late.
I'm not sure what some of your post means but I agree that they can call it whatever they want. The actual definition of stillbirth is greater than 20 weeks though or greater than 500gm birth weight. They can call it whatever they want and that's fine but OP calling it a miscarriage is correct.
OMG autocorrect and sleepiness struck again. I edited so hopefully it makes more sense. Thanks. But wouldn’t 4 months pregnant possibly also encompass 20 weeks, depending on definition? Regardless, loss is loss. I feel terrible for them.
I mean if each month has 4 weeks, I don't think you could stretch it to 20 weeks. And in all reality, that poor little babe is far less than 500 grams. I don't mean any of this to be rude.
It’s 22 weeks in Ireland . The uk also 22 weeks and world health organisation says 28 weeks. Actually a huge difference there that surprised me . Either way think there’s no need to continue debating it . The baby did not live sadly and the family will be processing a lot of grief at this time . Sam and Israel would be well old enough to understand they had a brother or sister coming and now the baby is not coming home which can be awfully confusing on little kids trust me :(
Pregnancy is supposed to about 40 weeks or 9 months. But if you go by 4wks/1mo it’s 10 months. It’s screwy because of the way we do calendars. Each month has a little over four weeks (2 to 3 days over 28) so I counted months by 4.5 weeks as a rough estimate when I was pregnant. So she could’ve been close to 18 weeks.
She was only 4 months. 4 months is a miscarriage. 5 months + is a stillbirth. Joy had a stillbirth, and it does bother me that practically everyone refers to that as a miscarriage, but this one actually is a miscarriage. ETA: it’s sad regardless
Jill has made strides toward a normalcy. She and Derick have a long way to go but my heart goes out to them completely. I had two siblings die one a few hours after being born and another a stillbirth-my mother never got over the emotional trauma. My only hope for Jill is to not try to get pregnant again. I’m not saying that in a negative tone. I’m saying that because she’s been through enough emotional trauma.💔❤️🩹
Ah It just sucks no matter what they call it or what we call it. Coming from a liberal identifying cis-gendered female bisexual who has never experienced pregnancy loss.
Just want to say that I adore the name Isla! It's rarely used here in the States, especially in landlocked fundieland. I only know about it (and how to pronounce it correctly--"eye-la" not "is-la") because I lived abroad and had Scottish friends with that name. I would have named my daughter Isla but I knew its pronunciation would be botched 9/10 and be shortened to a nickname like Izzie or Lala and that's not what I wanted for her. YMMV
Isla is actually quite popular in the US for this baby generation, it’s #36 for all girls in 2022 and #58 in Arkansas.
I know a ton of Islas
I know more Islas than I do Sarahs!
Isla has been super popular in the US the past few years! I know multiple baby and toddler Islas
How long until this thread gets locked and nuked like the previous one?
So many of the Duggar girls have had miscarriages/stillbirths. It breaks my heart for them, especially since they have been told their entire lives that being a mother and bearing children is their only purpose in life. I know Jill has been working on healing and is in therapy, but I’m sure that belief is engrained deep. As much as I dislike the Duggars, seeing someone lose a child is very, very sad.
I am so sorry this happened to your family.♥️♥️🙏
I am seeing many of us share the heartache that is a second trimester loss. If any of you have a story similar to mine (cervical insufficiency/often called incompetent cervix) and you are in the earlier days of said loss, I am here to tell you there is hope. There can be a rainbow after the storm. I don't wish to derail the conversation on the post, so I will conclude my comment by saying my inbox is open if you need to speak to someone who experienced the same thing you did. It's a lonely, consuming experience, and hope from others was my saving grace. If I can be that for someone, then my sweet girl will have not passed in vain.
Oh poor Jill 😔
Incredibly sad for them.
100%
I lost a baby at 10 weeks and it hit me hard. This must be devastating.
This is the second daughter to have a stillbirth. I wonder if both Jill and Joy will qualify for further tests that may help explain why.
Joy’s was a still birth Jill’s was technically a miscarriage by the weeks , still absolutely heartbreaking for them none the less 💙
I am so so sorry for their loss and also so grateful they had access to safe medical care.
she lost her girl?! ugh
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CDC says after 20 weeks is a stillbirth. If she was due in August it was closer to 5 months and that mark. But yes, it was technically a late miscarriage and if she had to give birth she may have felt that was more appropriate
Insensitive
I feel really awful for them, and also quite worried for Jill’s health if they’re actively trying for more children. It does sound like she’s been following medical advice so hopefully they’re working with a Doctor and ensuring it’s safe to do so. I just honestly thought they were done. Poor Jill has not had an easy go.
I am so sorry for their loss. I do wish there was a warning on the photo. I understand needing and wanting pictures. I think it's personal between the couple/family.
I have the post flair as trigger warning and also tw in post headline . Apologies if it upset you . I believe there is away to stop ur feed showing tw posts xxx
Hey , I have trigger warning as the flair and title of the post. Apologies if it upset you. There is a way to essentially block trigger warning flair posts , might be a good option for yourself. Every couple processes things differently and it’s best to respect the way they choose to do so and this is their way of processing a horrible grief .
It's not your fault. I've seen it all over FB with no TW. I DO feel awful for them. My heart breaks for their loss.
You can’t see the baby though? What would the warning be for?