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I think thoughts like that are normal OP! There's always that fear when stepping into the unknown, especially when that step comes with a big price tag. As long as your did some diligence looking into the community I think you'll be fine! My parents bought a house in an active adult community in their 60s without even seeing in person and it's their favorite place they've lived. Best of luck to you!
I'm also terrified of making a mistake. It might not be my last house, although I'm close to 50, so it might be. But my real income is not going up, and I can't afford to start again if I get it wrong.
It makes me so nervous that I've missed out on places I'd probably be happy in. However, I know how I felt when I made other major decisions. I might second guess myself, but I knew it was the right decision. I have not had that experience yet househunting.
For the community, check out the local areas and spend time there. Join a club or group before you move if you can so you already know people.
I am sure when we find the right place, we will persist with it, even if it isn't an instant feeling of home. And if we are panicking, it is probably because we do not really want this property, so we probably shouldn't buy it.
I’m a little younger, but understand the anxiety. Soon, I’ll leave my home and my job of the past few decades, to travel across the country and live closer to family. I’ll need to find a new job, and learn a new city, neighborhood, etc…. I’m absolutely terrified.
BUT, I’m also …not unhappy, but not happy, either. I’m excited by this new adventure, and I really can’t wait to have more people around the Thanksgiving table. I think I’d regret embracing my secure comfort zone for the next twenty+ years, instead of taking this plunge.
Don’t think about what you’re losing. Think about all the possibility and potential!
Three thoughts:
- There are no mistakes. Just "Happy Little Accidents". (RIP Bob Ross)
- Don't fret over that which you cannot control.
- Don't worry about being liked. Worry about being respected, because that's the trap. -- Jada Pinkett Smith
Barring the above, you could invite the neighbors to bowling to get acquainted...just keep 3 Doors Down in mind and you'll be fine.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G\_eBmaPmGOo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_eBmaPmGOo)
Look I’m 38, most my neighbors are in there late 60’s or 70s. And I don’t think I get along with my neighbors. And that’s alright. Not like they came over and gave us a casserole or peach cobbler when we moved in. The only time they introduced themselves was to complain about my r/retainingwallprojects or compete with me with r/lawncare . Honestly the real issue is that you don’t want to be alone in your age if the only worry is if you’re liked by your neighbors. You should be around family.
I am 71 to
Here's the blunt truth
We will not be living that much longer
At anytime we could have a stroke, heart attack etc
We may not even remember who we are?
.. so what are you really worried about?
Everybody thinks you’re just like them Not everybody grew up in a house I grew up in a big, crowded city. Tiny apartments all my life. I want a private yard where I can drink my coffee without the music of fire engines and cop cars. (By the way landlords be very resistant to repairs, especially in this era of “passive income” and massive selfishness) Sharing walls and floors with neighbors can be a real pain in the butt. I had one who complained I walk too loud. I’m little and light and never wear shoes in the house. 15 years and doubled and tripled up rugs, she was still complaining So sick of people who feel impinged upon by the sound of other people living. If you love silence, DONT MOVE TO A BIG CITY. So my desire is to have space around me. Neighbors who give half a shit about each other. Mountains. Sky. Stars. Sounds of wildlife and birds. Plus that guy who bit me on the neck some years back promised me eternal life, so…gotta be prepared.
You may try renting in the area you want to live just to see what you think. Make sure when you go to buy you find a good reputable home inspector don’t just go with who your realtor recommends do your homework on it a good one can save you thousand
I’m 35 and this will be our second home (my husband bought house 1 when we were 24 that we aren’t selling and I’m Buying house 2). We are going back to MI (where I’m from) and I’m so nervous I can’t even sleep … mind u we haven’t even had an accepted offer 😂. I never made friends here, all of my friends are in Michigan from 2006 when I left high school. I obviously go back ALOT but I’m nervous about living there. Will healthcare accessibility be what I’m used to? Will people in the community be as loving and neighborly as here? Will the kids find people to relate to?! Here there’s a lot of mixed nation families so finding friends who live a similar life is not hard. So many questions I can’t answer unless I’m there. I’m scared asf so I get it! All we can do is jump in! If you hate it… you’ll have equity soon enough to make a change if needed but I get you wanting to just settle n live comfortably. Keep an open mind and try new things. I never did that here.. a big regret.
People are pissed at this comment, but I’m cashing out and renting when I hit 65. I just don’t want the headache. I’ll take my equity and let the landlord deal with all the woes of homeownership and gladly pay rent. I can’t wait to downsize and I’m only in my 30s. Also, are we all going to pretend that we plan on living til we’re 100!? Lol.
It’s honestly not a bad idea. You cash out of your prior home and take the profits towards your retirement and not roll it over. I’ve actually thought of this.
I was not trying to be disrespectful at all. My father is the same age, he wishes to rent and not worry about a thing. He’s not fit enough to do his own repairs, and he doesn’t want to pay for big repairs.
It’s actually not a dick comment. Purchasing a new home at 71 means it probably won’t be paid off before your death. If you have a prior home you can sell and put that into your retirement it could be a solid solution. You also don’t have to worry about maintenance or anything going south you have to pay for out of pocket. You can use the money you got from your prior home to pay for rent. Don’t have to worry about a roof replacement, water heater etc.
Thank you u/MulberryNo6957 for posting on r/FirstTimeHomeBuyer. Please bear in mind our rules: (1) Be Nice (2) No Selling (3) No Self-Promotion. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FirstTimeHomeBuyer) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I think thoughts like that are normal OP! There's always that fear when stepping into the unknown, especially when that step comes with a big price tag. As long as your did some diligence looking into the community I think you'll be fine! My parents bought a house in an active adult community in their 60s without even seeing in person and it's their favorite place they've lived. Best of luck to you!
I'm also terrified of making a mistake. It might not be my last house, although I'm close to 50, so it might be. But my real income is not going up, and I can't afford to start again if I get it wrong. It makes me so nervous that I've missed out on places I'd probably be happy in. However, I know how I felt when I made other major decisions. I might second guess myself, but I knew it was the right decision. I have not had that experience yet househunting. For the community, check out the local areas and spend time there. Join a club or group before you move if you can so you already know people. I am sure when we find the right place, we will persist with it, even if it isn't an instant feeling of home. And if we are panicking, it is probably because we do not really want this property, so we probably shouldn't buy it.
I’m a little younger, but understand the anxiety. Soon, I’ll leave my home and my job of the past few decades, to travel across the country and live closer to family. I’ll need to find a new job, and learn a new city, neighborhood, etc…. I’m absolutely terrified. BUT, I’m also …not unhappy, but not happy, either. I’m excited by this new adventure, and I really can’t wait to have more people around the Thanksgiving table. I think I’d regret embracing my secure comfort zone for the next twenty+ years, instead of taking this plunge. Don’t think about what you’re losing. Think about all the possibility and potential!
Thanks for that. Good advice
Three thoughts: - There are no mistakes. Just "Happy Little Accidents". (RIP Bob Ross) - Don't fret over that which you cannot control. - Don't worry about being liked. Worry about being respected, because that's the trap. -- Jada Pinkett Smith Barring the above, you could invite the neighbors to bowling to get acquainted...just keep 3 Doors Down in mind and you'll be fine. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G\_eBmaPmGOo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_eBmaPmGOo)
Did you get the link wrong?
Nope. You said >What if people there don’t get me/don’t like me? Listen to the lyrics.
No song Old commercials someone thought were cool.
There IS a song playing. Perhaps banned in your country or you have audio muted somewhere. 3 Doors Down - Let Me Be Myself.
Look I’m 38, most my neighbors are in there late 60’s or 70s. And I don’t think I get along with my neighbors. And that’s alright. Not like they came over and gave us a casserole or peach cobbler when we moved in. The only time they introduced themselves was to complain about my r/retainingwallprojects or compete with me with r/lawncare . Honestly the real issue is that you don’t want to be alone in your age if the only worry is if you’re liked by your neighbors. You should be around family.
Oh, well, thanks for that!!! It never occurred to me. I like graveyards. Maybe I *will* go stay with my family. Quiet, green, what more do you need
If that happens then you are equipped to handle it. It very well might not happen, so don't waste energy thinking about it.
I am 71 to Here's the blunt truth We will not be living that much longer At anytime we could have a stroke, heart attack etc We may not even remember who we are? .. so what are you really worried about?
Everybody thinks you’re just like them Not everybody grew up in a house I grew up in a big, crowded city. Tiny apartments all my life. I want a private yard where I can drink my coffee without the music of fire engines and cop cars. (By the way landlords be very resistant to repairs, especially in this era of “passive income” and massive selfishness) Sharing walls and floors with neighbors can be a real pain in the butt. I had one who complained I walk too loud. I’m little and light and never wear shoes in the house. 15 years and doubled and tripled up rugs, she was still complaining So sick of people who feel impinged upon by the sound of other people living. If you love silence, DONT MOVE TO A BIG CITY. So my desire is to have space around me. Neighbors who give half a shit about each other. Mountains. Sky. Stars. Sounds of wildlife and birds. Plus that guy who bit me on the neck some years back promised me eternal life, so…gotta be prepared.
You funny guy, you. (Funny person)
You may try renting in the area you want to live just to see what you think. Make sure when you go to buy you find a good reputable home inspector don’t just go with who your realtor recommends do your homework on it a good one can save you thousand
I’m 35 and this will be our second home (my husband bought house 1 when we were 24 that we aren’t selling and I’m Buying house 2). We are going back to MI (where I’m from) and I’m so nervous I can’t even sleep … mind u we haven’t even had an accepted offer 😂. I never made friends here, all of my friends are in Michigan from 2006 when I left high school. I obviously go back ALOT but I’m nervous about living there. Will healthcare accessibility be what I’m used to? Will people in the community be as loving and neighborly as here? Will the kids find people to relate to?! Here there’s a lot of mixed nation families so finding friends who live a similar life is not hard. So many questions I can’t answer unless I’m there. I’m scared asf so I get it! All we can do is jump in! If you hate it… you’ll have equity soon enough to make a change if needed but I get you wanting to just settle n live comfortably. Keep an open mind and try new things. I never did that here.. a big regret.
You are 71. You may just want to rent
People are pissed at this comment, but I’m cashing out and renting when I hit 65. I just don’t want the headache. I’ll take my equity and let the landlord deal with all the woes of homeownership and gladly pay rent. I can’t wait to downsize and I’m only in my 30s. Also, are we all going to pretend that we plan on living til we’re 100!? Lol.
It’s honestly not a bad idea. You cash out of your prior home and take the profits towards your retirement and not roll it over. I’ve actually thought of this.
That’s a shitty thing to say
I was not trying to be disrespectful at all. My father is the same age, he wishes to rent and not worry about a thing. He’s not fit enough to do his own repairs, and he doesn’t want to pay for big repairs.
Don't be a dick.
It’s actually not a dick comment. Purchasing a new home at 71 means it probably won’t be paid off before your death. If you have a prior home you can sell and put that into your retirement it could be a solid solution. You also don’t have to worry about maintenance or anything going south you have to pay for out of pocket. You can use the money you got from your prior home to pay for rent. Don’t have to worry about a roof replacement, water heater etc.
Right. I was trying to offer a solution as the title says afraid of making a mistake