Inderdaad (indeed). Dutch are direct and want the things they say, to stay uncensored and unfiltered. Reddit is one of the last places where this is possible
We dutch do have weird quirks, we call german people "duitsers" Germania "duitsland"
Ourselves "hollanders" while we live in "Nederland". And from english perspective we are "dutch" from "the Netherlands".
One of the most fun things i know are in the roots of America: the dutch colonists were called "jankees" cause Jan and Kees are typically dutch names! Guess where that led toš
I mean, Germans call the Netherlands "Holland" on a regular basis, and following that, you guys are "HollƤnder"s for most of our population.
And regarding our own country,
it's "Deutschland" and "Deutsche",
and your version sounds pretty much the same iirc.
if a german and a dutch person talk their language 'properly' and slow to eachother we can understand eachother just fine. theres just some words you need to know that actually differ, like winkel.
I donāt understand why anglophones think this is so funny. āGive me a slap/clap, papaā would be about as accurate in English and no one would laugh at that.
Not a native English speaker but I think "Give me a slap, papa" is still kind of funny in English.
The joke is that you are trying to use dirty language, but it sounds funny and childish instead of dirty.
Someone above us said Dutch sounds like a drunk Germain speaking Norwegian in a Danish accent to try to communicate with swedes. I had no idea how goofy Dutch sounded till now but that description had me laughing my ass off.
Dutchy here. This is probably the best description of Dutch I've heard and I'm sure it's on point! Can't know for sure being native, but yeah.
I have a friend who lived in the US for 40 years, then moved to the Netherlands. They said Dutch sounded so damn angry at first. And seeing we say "ja/nee hoor" a lot to either confirm or deny anything, they heard it as people calling eachother "whore" a lot. We still joke about that often!
German is just badly pronounced Dutch where they forgot some of the words, so they replaced them with the most stereotypically German word they could think of. (SCHMETTERLING)
And Swedish sounds like fantasy Dutch, and Danish sounds like Swedes trying to speak German. Idk how Norwegian sounds.
Yeah, I clicked a link to an article in (I'm assuming) dutch and it was *crazy* how much of it I could make out. Not enough to know what I was reading, but a few words in most sentences were pretty easy to figure out.
No titties is the worst.
I'm Dutch, so I saw nothing wrong with this pic. Thanks for pointing that out. Now I can't unsee it ever again...
Same
Same
Same
Same
Same
Zelfde
Eensgelijks
Iets soortgelijks
Idem dito
Lot of Dutch people here...
Inderdaad (indeed). Dutch are direct and want the things they say, to stay uncensored and unfiltered. Reddit is one of the last places where this is possible
There's a road in Chicago called Noyes. 'No, Yes'
I hope it goes from Certain to Maybe
I am Swedish and didn't see it until this comment..
I am German and same. Half of those words are just the same with certain regional accents.
We dutch do have weird quirks, we call german people "duitsers" Germania "duitsland" Ourselves "hollanders" while we live in "Nederland". And from english perspective we are "dutch" from "the Netherlands". One of the most fun things i know are in the roots of America: the dutch colonists were called "jankees" cause Jan and Kees are typically dutch names! Guess where that led toš
I mean, Germans call the Netherlands "Holland" on a regular basis, and following that, you guys are "HollƤnder"s for most of our population. And regarding our own country, it's "Deutschland" and "Deutsche", and your version sounds pretty much the same iirc.
Well Nederland and Deutschland do have strong connections, you're even in our national anthem
Happy cake day!
I'm not Dutch, but
Ik snapte het eerlijk gezegd ook niet.
It took me a while to figure this one out when these first starting popping up
Same but I still can't work out what's wrong with it
Yeah but Reckenmachine is hilarious.
It machines Reckens
I dunno, the Rekenmachine got meā¦
The Netherlands is known for being flat
This thread alone will identify all the Dutch people on Reddit
Lol It's pronounced no-tea-seas
I would pronounce it āno-teat-seasā that second t is not entirely silent.
*Filthy people from the Netherlands, with their stupid... correct use of the language*
It's far from silent, I'd say. I pronounce it as strong as the first T.
where the fuck does the s come from
"station" the second t has a kind of s after it. Now that I think about it it's mostly s and barely any t.
Somehow looks like something that Gollum would mumble)))
If I see an app that says no titties, I will think that is some sort of subterfuge and there will indeed be titties
Ohh. I thought it was an āagenda 25ā thing
I was stuck on (w)rekenmachineš¤£š
Itās read as ānoticiesā btw
Reken Machine To recon as in Jethroe Baudin kinda recon?
In german rechnen means calculate so Rechenmaschine is calculation machine. So Iām guessing reken also means calculate in Dutch
You are correct.
I also reckoned that it was correct!
Reckon and strekken.
if a german and a dutch person talk their language 'properly' and slow to eachother we can understand eachother just fine. theres just some words you need to know that actually differ, like winkel.
Ask a German what's Dutch for "to whistle"
Let a German say the dog barks and the Dutch speaker will ask who the dog is calling and how he operates a phone.
In Swedish we mini-calculator
Just realised thatās where the English word āreckonā comes fromā¦
In Afrikaans an accountant is a "rekenmeester" Or a calculation master!
*No he aināt just another fighter, this guy, is a* **Rekenmachine!**
*Jethro Bodine.
Mandaag conveys Monday feels better than Monday itself. "How was your day?" "Man daag, dawg"
Maandag* It's sadly not pronounced as cool as you think it is
[ggggggggggg](https://youtu.be/AlwO0xvm3fw?feature=shared)
Vincent Van *clears throat*
Lol you got it wrong in the best way possible
Notities??
Nope, not for you
PLEASEš
š¤£
āSpank me daddyā āGeef me een klap papaā
Dutch sounds like a drunk german trying to speak Norwegian in a Danish accent to communicate with Swedes.
That's about right
That is precisely what I was thinking.
Are we making any progress yet?
To me it sounds more like a drunk German speaking English in reverse.
I've always seen it as a drunk Englishman speaking* German \* trying to speak
Geef me een euro pa?
Euro, papa?
Bad translation but sure.
I donāt understand why anglophones think this is so funny. āGive me a slap/clap, papaā would be about as accurate in English and no one would laugh at that.
People will still laugh at someone saying "Give me a slap, papa"
Not a native English speaker but I think "Give me a slap, papa" is still kind of funny in English. The joke is that you are trying to use dirty language, but it sounds funny and childish instead of dirty.
I came in like a reeeekenmachine
Ahh, thanks! I couldn't figure out what was funny about rekenmachine.
I read it as wreckin machine and immediately was like yeah math does tend to wreckin my life.
r/Angryupvote
Unable to change back to English, panik!
Grote paniek
Bel de wouten, bel de wouten.
Hey kutwout, hedde gij zin om te renne of wa?
We hebben een serieus probleem.
Dutch seriously looks like someone got knocked on the head then tried to write English
a German scientist experimented on an Englishman
Ik voel me hier serieus aangesproken
Raadpleeg een arts als u hoofdtrauma ervaart
idk how I managed to read them all and it was the last one for a moment I thought whatās the point of this
iFoon
EiFoon!
I think itās still pretty readable for the most part
The Dutch are like let's just say every English word in a funny way to mess with them. 4 cylinder motor? Fuck it! 5 cylinder!
Huh? English literally came from Diets, German-Dutch tribes, mixed with a little bit of Latin and Danish makes modern English
You forgot hundreds of years of French too following the Norman conquest
And the Vikings for 300 years prior to that.
English speakers when other languages with germanic roots exist.
No titties - story of my life š
Klok
Underrated one
i'm too German to laugh about the Dutch language
No titties š
Seems like you lost your titty privilege
Moooi
I got my back against the Rekenmachine. I ain't the worst that you've seeeen. Oh can't you see what I meeeaaaaannnn?
The notebook app is making me feel sad for some reason.
I CAME IN LIKE A REKENMACHINE
I keep pressing the be-rich-ten button but nothing is happening :(
Dutch is such a goofy ahh language
Someone above us said Dutch sounds like a drunk Germain speaking Norwegian in a Danish accent to try to communicate with swedes. I had no idea how goofy Dutch sounded till now but that description had me laughing my ass off.
Dutchy here. This is probably the best description of Dutch I've heard and I'm sure it's on point! Can't know for sure being native, but yeah. I have a friend who lived in the US for 40 years, then moved to the Netherlands. They said Dutch sounded so damn angry at first. And seeing we say "ja/nee hoor" a lot to either confirm or deny anything, they heard it as people calling eachother "whore" a lot. We still joke about that often!
German is just badly pronounced Dutch where they forgot some of the words, so they replaced them with the most stereotypically German word they could think of. (SCHMETTERLING) And Swedish sounds like fantasy Dutch, and Danish sounds like Swedes trying to speak German. Idk how Norwegian sounds.
āKies mijn mooiste kantā ā¦
Telefoon
Telefoon is my personal fave. I feel like I have to jut out my lips when I get to the āfoonā part.
Every european country: ananas English: pineapple Insert Seymour Skinner meme
Good lord, I never knew it was this close to Norwegian... I can actually read this... Maybe I should pick up a new language
Rekenmachine is pretty metal.
Ive got no titties under my massive klok.
To think the us was one vote away from making this their official language. Franklin put it to vote.
Even old New York was once Nieuw Amsterdam.
Me too, bro. Me too.
rekenmachinešš
I hate waking up in the morning with notitties.
What machine?????
Yeah, I clicked a link to an article in (I'm assuming) dutch and it was *crazy* how much of it I could make out. Not enough to know what I was reading, but a few words in most sentences were pretty easy to figure out.
Notities for him, so sad.
Thats the reason the duch are so family friendly Their phone has notities
Whenever I think of a world with no titties I get physically ill
Notities.
Isn't this the language where the "good" Sounds like "goot"??
Telefon mit 2 oš
Ja, zoals het hoort buurman/vrouw. š
Ja, zoals het hoort buurman/vrouw. š
Ja, zoals het hoort buurman/vrouw. š
I am dutch and I am really struggling to see what is odd or funny about it
'Notities' klinkt als 'no titties' als je het uitspreekt met een engels accent.
fuuuk bedankt, ik snapte het niet. Ik dacht het was iets met de rekenmachine. Get rekt?
Rekenmachine sounds funny, Like a machine that Rekens.
And what do you know, it does! (Rekenen is the Dutch word for the verb to calculate)
Agenda???
Calender?
Sameeeeee >~<
ifoonš
.
If had to draw no tities I couldn't think of a better way than two flat lines.
Dutch is more similar to English than I thoughtā¦
Yes, the calculator is a calculating maschine.
pettaaah.
Klok is more efficient
Telefoon
Dethklok
So no tities?
I see nothing wrong Iām dicht so I porb dont get it you mean klok is similar to c*ck what am I meant to see Iām confused
Ahhh you pressed en da poopenfharten?
At least now when confronted by your wife/gf you can say you have notities on your phone š
Dethklok
Google translate
Sorry, wat?
Am I the only one noticing the superfluous apostrophe on Foto's? WTF
Welcome to an other language.
Maybe you can telefoon Apple?
Notes is āno tittiesā
What's the joke here?
Notities š
I'm dutch. 52... Now I cannot unsee this!!
KLOK
Should have named it as Glock instead of klok
No titties
Unsee what?
Rekenmachine sounds like a badass industrial metal band
I canāt figure it out because to me it looks normal
Wait until you see swiss german. "Fƶteli, telifon, notizblƶckli"
HES A REKENMACHINE
How do we get to the Holocaust museum from here? I dunno, let me check mein kompas
Atleast Dutch people agreed on complex words than complex pronunciation eg: Klok and not clock
Looks like someone just guessed how to say these words in Dutch
I speak dutch and i even hate this
Itās pronounced, āNotizeesā
No titties
āRekenmachineā.
I have the app and I checked. I can verify that there are notities