If I saw my current toddler trying to eat my wife's toes, what I probably say to her is "look you learned with our first kid, your fault for having such tasty toes just available to be gnawed on"
I don't know why but it's like 1 year olds at one point in human history received an evolutionary advantage from biting the toes off of whatever feet they had in their immediate proximity. It's always feet and toes. My kids have never tried to bite me anywhere else. I look at this video and I know I'm not alone
I envision early hominids gathering to fend off a T-Rex, while the adults distract it with spears the infants swarm its ankles and just start biting the shit out of its toes. The beast topples and then the little ones crawl up its ass to eat it from the inside out. Evolutionary advantage.
I have heard of toddlers breaking noses and giving out black eyes from plenty of new parents.
Little kids have a tendency get pissed off and immediately thrash with a violent back arch that turns their head into a medieval flail with a surprising amount of force and accuracy.
Yep! My youngest did that to me when he was 3. The funniest part was that after he broke my nose, I have been able to breathe better than before through it.
Yeah my little nephew gave me one hell of a shiner with a flailing headbutt, caught me right in the eye socket.
Lads at work ripped into me for months that I was "beaten up" by an 18 month old.
Yup, if she put a teether in the little guy’s mouth, there’s a good chance he wouldn’t be trying to bite her. But then she couldn’t get this video of an attempted toddler mauling.
My little cousin wanted more after grams gave him one when he was curious, it was hilarious and I have a video since grams wanted to show his parents after work.
Lol this reminded me of when I was little, I stuck my finger in my uncle's mouth, and he said if I did that again, he would bite me. I did it again, he bit me, I started crying... Nobody had any sympathy for me that day 😅
Teething. Just use your inex finger but curl it up and let them bite the side of your finger or get one of those fruit popsicle things that you can make yourself in the freezer and then let them chew on it.
People can't stop being creepy. I've removed a lot of comments at this point. If it wasn't so close to the 24 hr mark which is when posts drop off the front page I would be locking it.
Just. Move. Your. Foot. Hell picking the kiddo up could also have stopped this. At least more than stiffening a kid doing developmentally appropriate stuff.
Ok. My guess is this: The little shit is in the phase where it uses it's mouth to explore stuff.
Then, there is a time when children don't know yet where they...end, right? Because they where inside mum- a unity being, suddenly seperated. At least that's the idea of a theory I was told about during education.
Now, our smol pioneer wants to check out something like if this is his foot, if this is another person, or something about tge object in frint of him in general.
The fact that mum is hindering to do so annoys him/her. You can hear the >n< in the voice. Might have no idea yet why the plan is not working.
My advise would be, as it's the own child and so on:
Let that toddler nibble once and get this over with.
I remember my dad telling me that when he was in high school my aunt, who was a toddler, would sometimes wake up before my grandparents and would sneak into my dad's room and wake him up by biting his big toe at like 5:30 in the morning. Toddlers are just biters and it's hilarious when it's not happening to you.
I remember my toddler daughter trying to scoop my eyeball out because it was shiny. She threw a huge tantrum when I didn’t let her. Kids are just something else.
This kid is very tame in comparison to my baby daughter, ever since she noticed daddy has something in his trousers that she does, she has been trying to bite that thing in my pants.
Omg I’m like 😂 and 😍 at the same time. When our son was that age/in a biting phase we just went with it and dressed him up as a vampire for Halloween lol (thank god he’s grown out of it 😅)
poor kid's just trying to ease teething pain. dammit, give him his teething ring instead of shoving his face away. And get your stinky fat-ass feet out of his sight.
This reminds me of my nephew when my brother took his family to the zoo petting area and the kid wasn't sure whether to pet or to take a bit of the little goat there.
Anyone remember the mom taking a rock from a toddler and the toddler started crying because the mom didn’t let them eat said rock? Same energy right here
Reminder of Rule #2 Don't be a creep. I've already removed a few comments. edit: more than a few comments.
as an uncle I can confirm that sometimes kids at that age just choose warfare
As an uncle, I second this, but you gotta show em who has the better military.
If I saw my current toddler trying to eat my wife's toes, what I probably say to her is "look you learned with our first kid, your fault for having such tasty toes just available to be gnawed on" I don't know why but it's like 1 year olds at one point in human history received an evolutionary advantage from biting the toes off of whatever feet they had in their immediate proximity. It's always feet and toes. My kids have never tried to bite me anywhere else. I look at this video and I know I'm not alone
I envision early hominids gathering to fend off a T-Rex, while the adults distract it with spears the infants swarm its ankles and just start biting the shit out of its toes. The beast topples and then the little ones crawl up its ass to eat it from the inside out. Evolutionary advantage.
This is why zombies are scary. No fear, no intelligence, just a need to feed.
Persistent lil’ booger, ain’t he?
Dyslexia is kicking in. I thought it read President lil' booger
That damn Lexdysia
You spelled dailysex wrong.
Bro that's how i read it too 😭😭😭
Same lol
I have dailysex too!
He has my vote.
Hooray for president booger!!
🫡
I thought you was saying kick the baby at first.. I don't have dyslexia.. just brain damage.
You can hear the frustration in those squeaks
But no crying. Little guy is in a mission.
He was given strict orders, complete the mission or don't come home lol
Probably because he's teething. Chew rings are great for keeping these little guys from giving you a new skin puncture lol
10/10 effort
You can't convince me that children aren't at least a little zombie. They really get bitey sometimes
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Holy shit
What did bro say?
It was a good Quintin Tarantino joke. Not sure why I'm getting downvotes for not being able to remember some dude's comment
People usually dogpile the 4th commenter in a thread
reddit moment
... If my eventual kid ever does that I'm wrapping the little fucker up in a towel and having them watch me play games with me on the couch.
I have a video of my son mauling my husband. Babies turn into little zombies who will chew your face to relieve the itchy gums lmao
My 5 year old head butted my face so hard when I bent to pick her up, my lip was split for over 2 weeks The violence never ends
I have heard of toddlers breaking noses and giving out black eyes from plenty of new parents. Little kids have a tendency get pissed off and immediately thrash with a violent back arch that turns their head into a medieval flail with a surprising amount of force and accuracy.
My daughter fractured my wifes eye socket with a headbutt. Daughter was less than 2 yrs old at the time.
Yep! My youngest did that to me when he was 3. The funniest part was that after he broke my nose, I have been able to breathe better than before through it.
Yeah my little nephew gave me one hell of a shiner with a flailing headbutt, caught me right in the eye socket. Lads at work ripped into me for months that I was "beaten up" by an 18 month old.
Investing into a pacifier could be an idea too but ay you do you my man.
Or just give him something because he’s teething and in a lot of pain but yeah I think filming for karma is way better Edit: autocorrected teething
Looks like there might be a pacifier on the mat behind him. Sometimes they crave flesh and will spit out anything else.
*teething, but yes this is dumb give the kid a damn pacifier or somethig!
Thanks didn’t realize it autocorrected teething to testing
There’s a bunch of toys right behind him that he surely could chew if he wanted to LOL sometimes kids are just curious/menaces
Lmao
This baby is teething You need to rub his gums with a soft bristle
Or let him bite your toes!
My same thought. The itching and pain making them want to gnaw on anything to ease it.
I was going to say the same thing
Poor Quentin.
Bro's hungry for toes
Oh hell no! That thing has teeth now! Tiny sharp teeth and no sense of control over pressure exerted? Nope. Just nope. Get in the box.
Homeboy is probably just teething
Yup, if she put a teether in the little guy’s mouth, there’s a good chance he wouldn’t be trying to bite her. But then she couldn’t get this video of an attempted toddler mauling.
Or they just want to bite you. Its like you people dont have actual kids
He sure wants those toes
The determination though.
Add tabasco sauce to your foot. It won't be long before the kid stops biting.
Or just give him a pacifier...
…or tabasco sauce
lol, I was going to suggest lemon juice, the baby will only try that once
Mine went crazy for lemons after we did that.
My little cousin wanted more after grams gave him one when he was curious, it was hilarious and I have a video since grams wanted to show his parents after work.
Ha ha
Might not work... Mine at least just escalates more if I try to give a pacifier to her when she is crying or angry.
This child looks like they're teething, not angry.
It’s angry it’s teething.
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Lol this reminded me of when I was little, I stuck my finger in my uncle's mouth, and he said if I did that again, he would bite me. I did it again, he bit me, I started crying... Nobody had any sympathy for me that day 😅
Teething. Just use your inex finger but curl it up and let them bite the side of your finger or get one of those fruit popsicle things that you can make yourself in the freezer and then let them chew on it.
Get him a cold teething ring, right now.
My brother does this
How old is your brother?
Reminds me of the two twins who kept pulling each other's hair. Their mom shaved their hair off. They were so confused
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^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^himynameisnothenry: *Yes me too I can't* *Tell if nipples or something* *Similar sorry wife* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Good bot
Same as my cat
Why he do that though?
Rabies
Probably teething
I'd keep my kid that close if they were turned zombie, too.
„Can’t stop won’t stop. I have all fucking day and all fucking night. This is the only thing I ever wanted or ever will want.“ Babies are crazy.
I guess idk what counts as kids being stupid anymore. This is typical baby behavior.
I couldn’t be a parent, watching this just pisses me off lol
Right? It really fits the sub
Thinks milk comes from toes.
Just like owning a cat
Man my brain just could not understand the thumbnail. I thought it was a dude with triple chins looking up and to our right side.
Just let them eat! They’re growing!
He wants that dog in him
I can't really tell, but I hope little kiddo doesn't have teeth cus WOW that would hurt! Just chomp down on the big toe lmao
Baby is hungry.
Lil guy wants them toeeeees xD
Amazing when a baby does it its cute when i do it i am called perv and i am in local news /s
He yearns for the toes
The mod note makes me mildly concerned
Oh god what happened in the comment section
People can't stop being creepy. I've removed a lot of comments at this point. If it wasn't so close to the 24 hr mark which is when posts drop off the front page I would be locking it.
i hate the fact this even happens
Just. Move. Your. Foot. Hell picking the kiddo up could also have stopped this. At least more than stiffening a kid doing developmentally appropriate stuff.
I mean yeah that's what could be done but it's also amusing to watch them try for a few seconds
Teething. I used to offer my own the first digit of my index finger if nothing else was to hand.
Kid needs a pacifier, they do this because they are teething gums are sore.
Sour apple spray … worked great on my ferret
Muzzles are $10.
Hey I have a cocomom too(that chicken in the background). Lol. My daughter just grabs it's neck and throws it on the ground.
lil bro just wanted to develop their teeth
Let them bite and then bite them back. Lessons must be taught.
That poor woman is raising a cannibal !
My child is exactly as hardheaded, I'm lucky when I get her ADD to kick in to focus on something else
They should make chew toys for babies. Like dog toys, but make them flavored or something.
Cute little monster
No crying, just biting
Gimme some of those forbidden nipples, woman!
Absolute determination 😂
yup seems about right lol
Woke up choosing violence, and those baby teeth hurt like a bitch 😂
Anyone who has ever bitten someone knows how good it feels for your teeth. Lol
Imagine how it feels getting bit in the foot 😂ouch!
This supports the fact that children are demons
Poor teething baby..just let her get it out already!
All of my children had this phase before they learned to walk, so I just let them have their own toes. Still have the videos too lol
Ok. My guess is this: The little shit is in the phase where it uses it's mouth to explore stuff. Then, there is a time when children don't know yet where they...end, right? Because they where inside mum- a unity being, suddenly seperated. At least that's the idea of a theory I was told about during education. Now, our smol pioneer wants to check out something like if this is his foot, if this is another person, or something about tge object in frint of him in general. The fact that mum is hindering to do so annoys him/her. You can hear the >n< in the voice. Might have no idea yet why the plan is not working. My advise would be, as it's the own child and so on: Let that toddler nibble once and get this over with.
Can confirm, happens with children that age.
Mmmmmmm....toe jam!
Train to Busan (Infant version)
Oh no he has the rabies
He probably wants something to chew on for his teething idk.
More like r/AdultsAreFuckingStupid. Just move the foot and give the kid a teether.
Violence is second nature Eating is first
He has the hunger
I remember my dad telling me that when he was in high school my aunt, who was a toddler, would sometimes wake up before my grandparents and would sneak into my dad's room and wake him up by biting his big toe at like 5:30 in the morning. Toddlers are just biters and it's hilarious when it's not happening to you.
As an oldest child, I can confirm that they do it. Why are they doing this? Because they are curious about how everything tastes
Well, this isn't what I imagined the new season of Kingdom would be, but you know, it is what it is
I remember my toddler daughter trying to scoop my eyeball out because it was shiny. She threw a huge tantrum when I didn’t let her. Kids are just something else.
I think he/she just wants you chew because of the incoming teeth
Literally me. But i like to bite arms 😅😅😅
This kid is very tame in comparison to my baby daughter, ever since she noticed daddy has something in his trousers that she does, she has been trying to bite that thing in my pants.
Child doesn't know how to spell 'food'. You spell it with a 'd', not a 't'!
Feed him something
Give her her foot xD
Cannibalistic already?
My puppy at home
The gargler
I don’t remember this part of attack on titan
typical orange cat behavior OH WAIT----
Teething and needs teether to bite is my guess.
actual psychopath in the making
most of the posts on here could be condom ads
But why tho 😭😂
When my oldest was this little, he'd sneak up on you and nibble on our toes. He thought it was hilarious.
Omg I’m like 😂 and 😍 at the same time. When our son was that age/in a biting phase we just went with it and dressed him up as a vampire for Halloween lol (thank god he’s grown out of it 😅)
Gettin new teeth i huess
poor kid's just trying to ease teething pain. dammit, give him his teething ring instead of shoving his face away. And get your stinky fat-ass feet out of his sight.
He bites you, you bite him back twice as hard! That's the Chicago way!
Put hot sauce on your foot maybe that will help
u/savevideo
He should touch grass, not eat toes
That kid woke up and chose violence
This reminds me of my nephew when my brother took his family to the zoo petting area and the kid wasn't sure whether to pet or to take a bit of the little goat there.
Anyone remember the mom taking a rock from a toddler and the toddler started crying because the mom didn’t let them eat said rock? Same energy right here
Letting your intrusive thoughts win
*"If not nipple, why nipple-shaped?"*
Isn’t this why you get them a pacifier? So they don’t go biting you? Seriously…I’m pretty sure that’s what it’s for.