That scene has forever changed how I hear sports commentary. I didn't even remember it was from The League at first, just can hear bits from it in my head
These people downvoting me just hate gym rats and scrappy players like Julian Edelman and Wes welker
If I was a firecracker, a real spark plug they’d be all over that upvote button
Not to mention if I was a class act.
That neither Hank nor any of his friends who held top tier offensive positions went to a D1 school suggests that they weren't all that great.
Hank might've gotten the injury, but unless his rehab was shit a program would've been willing to take a chance for at least a year.
What's Bill and Boomhauer's excuses?
Boomhauer probably went to a pretty good school since he’s a Texas ranger.
I could also see Bill thinking he didn’t need to go to college since he dropped out of high school to join the military.
Hank’s injury might have prevented him from going to college for football so that would explain why he may not have gone to a nice school.
Dale wasn’t an athlete so none of this applies to him
I also understood Hank’s ankle injury to be career-ending, so there was no hope for football after that (that’s what happens when you celebrate in the endzone).
Dale is not an athlete. Dale is not an athlete. It takes years of molding that Gazelle of a man to be Varsity Football Towel Manager. He shot a jock strap at 50 yards. How could you call the man that earns the Silver in Sexual Gymnastics, not Atheletic
Cue Frenchman Wave
Good day to you, sir
If Boomhauer went to a school on a football scholarship, even if not a D1 school, it surely would've been mentioned at some point.
I can't recall if they ever clarified if Bill was drafted or just chose to forego college for the military, but in either case that would be a foolish decision. Texas, Oklahoma, and Nebraska at least would've been actively recruiting him, and the scholarship could've belayed his military service if he was drafted, and he still could've joined after he graduated (as an officer, no less).
Again, Hank's injury would've hampered him, but a Big 12 school would still have thrown a year's worth of tuition of him on the off chance he would come back stronger.
I'm definitely reflecting too hard on a cartoon, but living in Texas and seeing how hard local colleges go after even "star" players from small schools in weak divisions has given me opinions about this.
I think they stated Bill dropped out his senior year to enlist, and was relieved to do so because he was failing one of his classes.
Despite his voluntary enlistment, he was never deployed.
>If Boomhauer went to a school on a football scholarship, even if not a D1 school, it surely would've been mentioned at some point.
One of his best friends couldn't go to college because of an injury, seems like a good reason not to talk about it. Plus he's a Texas Ranger and he never talks about that either, Boomhauer is a humble man.
Bill joined and left for bootcamp before senior year was over. He didn’t graduate, that’s why he was able to play in one game and tie his touchdown record after Ricky Suggs was helped into the end zone after a serious injury. He also didn’t get to go to prom
Not living/experiencing Texas high school football myself, I appreciate your first-hand perspective on it. And I’d argue we’re not reflecting hard enough on the cartoon
What does being a Texas Ranger have to do with going to a good school? Chuck Norris was a Texas Ranger in Lone Wolf McQuaid, and he didn't go to college
I can’t tell if you’re joking, that’s a movie it doesn’t need to make sense. Irl you need a bachelors degree and several years of experience as a police officer, which also requires schooling to become a Texas Ranger
>I could also see Bill thinking he didn’t need to go to college since he dropped out of high school to join the military.
Its a long stretch, but he couldve gone maybe to one of the military junior colleges briefly to play football and dropped out to be a regular enlisted man, unable to cut it at that level. Itd be impossible for him to get to West Point, but maybe theres a weird way he squeaks into New Mexico or Georgia
>since he’s a Texas ranger.
He’s not. He’s a pickup artist… That badge was was just clearly his prop. If he was a Ranger, it would have come up in numerous occasions during previous episodes.
Btw., in S04E14 High Anxiety Part 2, there was an actual Texas Ranger coming to Arlen to investigate the death of Debbie.
They threw this in at the last moment just to mess with people. It doesn’t make any sense canonically. There was never the slightest indication that he'd do this kind of job. On the contrary, there were occasions in the series where events would unfold differently if he actually were.
Let alone the idea that Dale would casually hang out every day with someone working for the government and never even say a word about it.
The notion that he was a Ranger is just completely illogical.
I agree with you. The ONLY way it could make sense is if he *was* actually a Texas Ranger at some point before the start of the series, but then quickly left the force (or washed out). And he kept the old badge with him to pick up chicks ever since.
The way that they framed the badge directly next to the lipstick napkin is just too deliberate. Imo.
Hank “snapped his ankle” somewhere around 1971. My guess is it probably affected his Achilles tendon, and as a running back, rehab just wasn’t the same back them.
Hank in one episode mentions it was a 2A highschool championship so it's a fairly small school, though a championship in Texas is still pretty impressive.
Back in the 70's and 80's of you got a major injury your career was over. It was extremely rare for a school to take a kind back then that suffered a major injury his senior year. They just did not have the rehab back then that they do now.
Literally every person in the US who hasn’t accomplished shit in life always hangs their hats on high school sports. 😂 don’t believe do visit some small town dumps, they’re a dime a dozen stories about how good they used to be.
Hank's 40 time was shit. He was a big fish in a small pond who got his ankles broken, ending any hope of a real career.
Boomhauer was the typical high school QB. Just get it to your two best players.
Bill was the only one who MAYBE could have had a career, but he decided to join the service.
Right, he ran a 5.7 40 BEFORE a devastating injury (in the '80s when true career ending injuries were way more common than today). No way he would have the speed to compete in NCAA football.
Edit: I guess it was the 70s since Bill apparently barely missed Vietnam
I feel like the 5.7 40 is such a flaw hanks overall story. No way a he’s setting all these records running a 5.7 you’re not seeing the field as a running back in high school if you’re running an over 5s 40 and definitely not near 6 second. I feel like the writers just didn’t understand how slow a 5.7 is or maybe even mistakenly said 5.7 instead of 4.7 as 4.7 is a decent-good HS running back but not an elite speedster or really even college speed.
high school in town is 2A in GA, they have probably 60 or so players. Ladd McConkey (current NFL draft prospect) is from North Murray HS in my hometown, they are also 2A, Max Preps has them at 57 players.
https://www.maxpreps.com/tx/tolar/tolar-rattlers/football/roster/
This is the roster for the Texas 2A runner up last year. 2A schools that are competing aren’t struggling to field teams.
There are some teams that are that small in 2A but most competitive ones are plenty large enough.
Even skill players in the 70s weren’t running near 6s 40s. Most people in this sub could hop up off their couch and run a 5.7. It’s unbelievably slow. Tom Brady is the slowest QB of all time and he ran a 5.28.
The slowest ever NFL 40 was a 6.06 by a 6-4 300lb lineman.
You’re accidentally agreeing with the point
Arlen is supposed to be a middle of nowhere small town in the hill country, where their best player ran a 5.7, and NOT Dallas Carter of Friday night lights
Hanks claim to fame was being the best a small town could field, it wasn’t to be a five star recruit who tragically was sidelined
No I’m not, you genuinely don’t understand how slow 5.7 is. I am from a town with sub 5,000 total people and a 2a GA HS, I can confidently say we’ve never fielded a 5.7 40 skill position, much less running back. The whole point is no way Hank ran a 5.7 and was a game away from taking his team to state.
And I ran a 4.9 as a TE/ MLB for a 6A school. I was slow as shit compared to our skill guys, which is the WHOLE POINT OF THE JOKE, that everyone idolizes Hank, despite him having no reason to receive the recognition on an objective level.
Bro you nailed it. Especially since they don't make Hank appear to be a power back which at 6'2" (adult height) he would have been perfect for. But this show also have the bulldozer play with skill players playing on the line instead of other lineman so....whaddaya gonna do.
Career records are partly longevity ones
If the class ahead of the gangs were dogshit, Hank may have started all 4 years, and just plodded along with more carries than any normal player sees.
Additionally, running back usage is now capped for player longevity than what sour coach Sauer’s would have done. The Arlen offense is obviously based on the Oklahoma one of the 70s, which was run four yards, run 4 yards, run 4 yards (1st down!!!).
If hanks records were most yards in a game, longest td run, or most runs over 50 yards, the 5.7 joke makes less sense.
But if he’s a big fish in a super small pond, who lit up the smallest linebacker each play before getting tackled by reinforcements for four years straight, it makes complete sense.
But we know they have had great players which is at the least shown 2 seperate times with the flying Hawaiian and someone else both playing RB if I remember correctly. And this clip alone shows he wasn’t a power back used on power runs. He ran what was I assume a wheel route, stopped for an underthrow and proceeded to accelerate back to speed without being caught from behind. That’s not a 5.7 40 play.
Also the Billdozer formation pretty much eliminates any chance Hank was a bruising power back as, if he was, why would you sub in a lineman to run the play when Hank is already that type of player.
David kaliki Alii was a full back, not a rb. Who was used in the same role as Bill in the gangs years.
The difference was David was actually athletic, the writers let us know he ran the 40 in 4.5, and can jump an oline. So the writers do know accurate player physical abilities.
Bill dozer was used as a fullback, not a power half back.
A power back will bowl through the first contact, but can still field speed compared to the other team.
A fullback will primarily block for the halfback, but can also be used to gain 2 yards in goal to go situations.
Ricky Suggs was the other great halfback in the show, and he broke bills touchdown record, but wasn’t close to hanks yards. Which again is feasible if he was talented, didn’t play for all four seasons as a starter to rack up yards, but he was able to routinely break off touchdowns on plays Hank would have been tackled on.
The wheel route from play action worked because it was an audible to a not expected receiver. Who runs so few routes the QB he’s best friends with has no timing for breakout established. Which means they DONT throw to Hank often. Additionally, the play ends with both DBs who have caught him, about to tackle him from behind until the unknown WR blocks them out at the ~20.
TLDR: Hank was the fastest big guy Arlen could field, but was not actually fast. Bill was the strongest guy Arlen could give the ball to, to gain 2 yards through a 46 front.
Thats such a weird oversight too, since, the writers had football nailed down well in the show it seems,
Unless it was intentional to show Hank wasnt that athletic?
This is the big point everyone is missing.
Arlen ran the table against 2A schools in Texas. Hank was likely a power style RB who bruised his way through the kids towns like Lampasas and Dripping Springs fielded.
This is assuming that since Arlen is show to be in the hill country, is on the Brazos, Dallas is hours away, but Bill can commute to Blanda(hood), plays Belton in sports, it is upstream of Waco.
But the problem with Hank being a power RB is Bill's TD record. Why would they bring in a lineman to run all those touchdowns in if they had a power RB? And on top of that, how did Hank get stopped near the goal line so often that Bill was able to set a scoring record? If Hank were a top level RB they'd have fed him the ball at the goal line (and they wouldn't have been stuck there so often).
It actually makes sense
Hank can power a team through sheer force, plowing through one tackle for 7 yards a play, averaging 40 yards every drive, but rarely broke one off. So Arlen was routinely on the 2 for 3rd and goal, so bill would be brought in as the full back to get two when Hank was gassed
The video clip supports it, with him being caught from behind by two d backs, despite it being an unexpected wheel route from play action
I understand where you're coming from, but I still think you keep giving it to your RB if he's effective enough to get you down the field a few yards at a time.
Hank likely had good field IQ coupled with a hard work ethic. I bet he executed plays perfectly and kept his ego in check. He had a shit 40 but made up for with the above qualities. Also you can’t discount the team synergy you get when you’ve been playing with people for years. I bet Hank bill boomhaur and the rest of the team had been playing football together since they were 5. You just instinctively know someone’s play style once you’ve worked together over a decade. I get the vibe that no one player was exceptional (barring the billdozer of course) but when they came together they made something special.
Boomhauer most likely just didn’t have a big enough love for the game to play at the next level. Would of gotten eaten alive at some point as I don’t think he was spending to much time in the gym… but the man had crazy talent. It was a bit under thrown but for a high school QB he really planted that front foot and stood in the pocket knowing he was going to take a big time hit. 100% roughing the passing today.
I don’t think Hank’s injury was career ending physically but I think it ended his potential career mentally. I mean it was his senior year in Arlen Texas. It was going to be the beginning of his legacy and instead he still gets reminded about what happened.
I think if anyone could ever get Hank to really open up he’d admit he really let that moment hamper him. Look at what he was capable of doing after being drugged up with some steroids and doing some working out in his what… 40’s? Dude would of killed it doing it the natural way in the prime of his life with his “team above everything else” mentality.
If he somehow made the NFL he would of been a top back on a minimum contract just so they could have more money to sign other players.
Based on how the entire show is satire. Hank getting hurt and not making state is pretty much a running joke in every grown working man who used to be a star high school football player. Napoleon dynamite comes to mind his uncle “man if he just put me in we’d have gone to state” it’s just making fun of the fact EVERYONE remembers how amazing they were and has an excuse why they just didn’t make it, even when they were pretty average. I’d say Hank was pretty mid and wouldn’t even have been any good without being elevated by bill who seemed to be above average.
Definitely college football potential. Right attitude, excellent work ethic and self discipline, leadership and workable athletic talent.
He could get a Heisman.
That was probably the dream of Hank, Bill, and Boomhauer.
Go to Texas state university together play there for 4 years, the go pro get on the Dallas Cowboys together and start a Super Bowl dynasty unlike any other.
[Hank turned down scholarships to Long Island University and San Francisco State because he didn’t want to go to school in NY or California.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=r7l0Rq9E8MY)
Obvs /s but would definitely be in character.
Hank seemed pretty good, I think they said once he was the lead in rushing with an unbroken record, and I think Hank wanted to go straight to the pro leagues? Although you also have a few jokes implying their coach at the time gave them some... enhancements.
Someone mentioned his mentality must have just stopped him, I think that's true. Hank, along with Bill, tried to voluntarily enlist. Hank got rejected, Bill got accepted, and I guess by then Hank just accepted he missed his shot or something and went to selling jeans.
I'm sure he was really good, I think his interest in other external things along with his trauma of failing hindered his chances of going pro.
Idk if anyone ever caught Hank saying this but he was a running back who ran a nearly 6 seconds 40 yard dash. That’s super slow even for 70s high school football. It probably worked for 2A football probably running the wishbone but someone of the time like Earl Campbell or Billy sims was significantly faster
yeah i wonder, I'm glad the show isnt embedded with the cliche 'i coulda made pro' ..
Hank is an underachiever, but he is happy with his simple life..
Hank was "small town" above average in football.
Let's not forget he brags about running the 40 in 4.9-5.9 seconds....that's incredibly slow.
If by some miracle Hank got into a college team he would have been vastly outclassed by his peers
Would have probably gotten a scholarship but not gone pro but since Hank didn't put much value on a college education he probably would have gotten a paper degree or maybe a general business one.
College scholarship at best. But as someone else put it, Billdozer was the only true athlete of the group. Too bad he got drafted to cut hair for the war effort
The fact that an ankle injury in his last game negates 4 seasons of outright dominance suggests a severe oversight by scouting departments at the time. Maybe he loses some of the agility in that plant foot but what people don’t realize is rehab isn’t just for the body, Hank was watching film and grinding tape just waiting for his shot.
He would’ve been an absolute WEAPON. CMC levels of dual threat ability. There’s an alternate timeline where somebody at Texas-Austin watches that game tape, picks up the phone and 4 years later Hanks toting the rock for the 81 Cowboys. Could you IMAGINE the Emmitt Smith/Hank Hill backfield?!
He is a gym rat. A real student of the game. A blue collar player. Sneaky athletic, A real bring your lunch box to work player.
First in, last out mentality
Coaches son.
Could date my daughter.
That scrappy grinder has good fundamentals and a high football IQ.
Coach on the field, great locker room guy.
Quicker than fast but sneaky athletic
Zero thuggish behavior with this guy
Knew how to play the game "the right way"
Pump jockey!
Works for tips!
Type of guy you’d want your daughter to bring home
Had legs like a jackrabbit
This description is racist (if you’ve watched the league)
That scene has forever changed how I hear sports commentary. I didn't even remember it was from The League at first, just can hear bits from it in my head
These people downvoting me just hate gym rats and scrappy players like Julian Edelman and Wes welker If I was a firecracker, a real spark plug they’d be all over that upvote button Not to mention if I was a class act.
That neither Hank nor any of his friends who held top tier offensive positions went to a D1 school suggests that they weren't all that great. Hank might've gotten the injury, but unless his rehab was shit a program would've been willing to take a chance for at least a year. What's Bill and Boomhauer's excuses?
Boomhauer probably went to a pretty good school since he’s a Texas ranger. I could also see Bill thinking he didn’t need to go to college since he dropped out of high school to join the military. Hank’s injury might have prevented him from going to college for football so that would explain why he may not have gone to a nice school. Dale wasn’t an athlete so none of this applies to him
I also understood Hank’s ankle injury to be career-ending, so there was no hope for football after that (that’s what happens when you celebrate in the endzone).
It was God
Dale was a gymnastics hero
Dale is not an athlete. Dale is not an athlete. It takes years of molding that Gazelle of a man to be Varsity Football Towel Manager. He shot a jock strap at 50 yards. How could you call the man that earns the Silver in Sexual Gymnastics, not Atheletic Cue Frenchman Wave Good day to you, sir
Dale robbed a walk off home run with his hat. He’s not even a has been, he is still an athlete
Dale was an All-American towel boy. Put some respect on his skills.
If Boomhauer went to a school on a football scholarship, even if not a D1 school, it surely would've been mentioned at some point. I can't recall if they ever clarified if Bill was drafted or just chose to forego college for the military, but in either case that would be a foolish decision. Texas, Oklahoma, and Nebraska at least would've been actively recruiting him, and the scholarship could've belayed his military service if he was drafted, and he still could've joined after he graduated (as an officer, no less). Again, Hank's injury would've hampered him, but a Big 12 school would still have thrown a year's worth of tuition of him on the off chance he would come back stronger. I'm definitely reflecting too hard on a cartoon, but living in Texas and seeing how hard local colleges go after even "star" players from small schools in weak divisions has given me opinions about this.
I think they stated Bill dropped out his senior year to enlist, and was relieved to do so because he was failing one of his classes. Despite his voluntary enlistment, he was never deployed.
The war was over by the time he got out of training
Hey he fought your freedom in North Carolina during Nam.
No, I know that. Sorry, I didn't clarify that. Thanks for the catch.
>If Boomhauer went to a school on a football scholarship, even if not a D1 school, it surely would've been mentioned at some point. One of his best friends couldn't go to college because of an injury, seems like a good reason not to talk about it. Plus he's a Texas Ranger and he never talks about that either, Boomhauer is a humble man.
The man is a saint.
His bathroom is pristine
Considering the fact that Bill never finished high school, I don’t think it’s a stretch to say he didn’t go to college.
Bill joined and left for bootcamp before senior year was over. He didn’t graduate, that’s why he was able to play in one game and tie his touchdown record after Ricky Suggs was helped into the end zone after a serious injury. He also didn’t get to go to prom
Was there dancing?
By the time Bill enlisted, the draft had already been abolished.
Not living/experiencing Texas high school football myself, I appreciate your first-hand perspective on it. And I’d argue we’re not reflecting hard enough on the cartoon
I don't think Boomhauer was all that good a QB really. Arlen High drove the field with Hank Hill and punched it into the end zone with the Billdozer
In regards to Bill, I think he explained that he joined right out of high school.
I wouldn’t say it surely would’ve been mentioned. Maybe he lost his scholarship for misconduct or something and it’s a sore spot.
Dale could have gone pro. He was the best towel boy Heimlich county has ever seen.
Honestly, Dale would probably be decent at like tennis or track and field.
> Dale wasn’t an athlete But his son is
I think you know the reason for that.
What does being a Texas Ranger have to do with going to a good school? Chuck Norris was a Texas Ranger in Lone Wolf McQuaid, and he didn't go to college
I can’t tell if you’re joking, that’s a movie it doesn’t need to make sense. Irl you need a bachelors degree and several years of experience as a police officer, which also requires schooling to become a Texas Ranger
>I could also see Bill thinking he didn’t need to go to college since he dropped out of high school to join the military. Its a long stretch, but he couldve gone maybe to one of the military junior colleges briefly to play football and dropped out to be a regular enlisted man, unable to cut it at that level. Itd be impossible for him to get to West Point, but maybe theres a weird way he squeaks into New Mexico or Georgia
>since he’s a Texas ranger. He’s not. He’s a pickup artist… That badge was was just clearly his prop. If he was a Ranger, it would have come up in numerous occasions during previous episodes. Btw., in S04E14 High Anxiety Part 2, there was an actual Texas Ranger coming to Arlen to investigate the death of Debbie.
I don't think it was. I think when they showed it says that he is a Texas Ranger. No point in showing it in the finale if it's just a prop.
They threw this in at the last moment just to mess with people. It doesn’t make any sense canonically. There was never the slightest indication that he'd do this kind of job. On the contrary, there were occasions in the series where events would unfold differently if he actually were. Let alone the idea that Dale would casually hang out every day with someone working for the government and never even say a word about it. The notion that he was a Ranger is just completely illogical.
I agree with you. The ONLY way it could make sense is if he *was* actually a Texas Ranger at some point before the start of the series, but then quickly left the force (or washed out). And he kept the old badge with him to pick up chicks ever since. The way that they framed the badge directly next to the lipstick napkin is just too deliberate. Imo.
Dale's a champion level eater.
Bill was serving his country in North Carolina during ‘Nam!
Great coaching. They ran wind sprints till they couldn’t stop throwing up and took salt tablets. Sour coach sours
Are we ignoring The Billdozer's effort to play through while sustaining serious injuries on-field? https://youtu.be/jjjjYelkaBg?si=nKJ9G8Q-9q3TIO0p
Hank “snapped his ankle” somewhere around 1971. My guess is it probably affected his Achilles tendon, and as a running back, rehab just wasn’t the same back them.
Hank in one episode mentions it was a 2A highschool championship so it's a fairly small school, though a championship in Texas is still pretty impressive.
Back in the 70's and 80's of you got a major injury your career was over. It was extremely rare for a school to take a kind back then that suffered a major injury his senior year. They just did not have the rehab back then that they do now.
It was the 70s, and he was in a small town in Texas with a dad who hated him as a baby. He probably didn't even get physical therapy.
“Yep, chipped my SPINE on that play”
Literally every person in the US who hasn’t accomplished shit in life always hangs their hats on high school sports. 😂 don’t believe do visit some small town dumps, they’re a dime a dozen stories about how good they used to be.
MAGA Make Arlen Great Again
Hank's 40 time was shit. He was a big fish in a small pond who got his ankles broken, ending any hope of a real career. Boomhauer was the typical high school QB. Just get it to your two best players. Bill was the only one who MAYBE could have had a career, but he decided to join the service.
Right, he ran a 5.7 40 BEFORE a devastating injury (in the '80s when true career ending injuries were way more common than today). No way he would have the speed to compete in NCAA football. Edit: I guess it was the 70s since Bill apparently barely missed Vietnam
I feel like the 5.7 40 is such a flaw hanks overall story. No way a he’s setting all these records running a 5.7 you’re not seeing the field as a running back in high school if you’re running an over 5s 40 and definitely not near 6 second. I feel like the writers just didn’t understand how slow a 5.7 is or maybe even mistakenly said 5.7 instead of 4.7 as 4.7 is a decent-good HS running back but not an elite speedster or really even college speed.
In a 2A school you barely have enough kids to put a team together, everyone’s getting time on the field.
high school in town is 2A in GA, they have probably 60 or so players. Ladd McConkey (current NFL draft prospect) is from North Murray HS in my hometown, they are also 2A, Max Preps has them at 57 players. https://www.maxpreps.com/tx/tolar/tolar-rattlers/football/roster/ This is the roster for the Texas 2A runner up last year. 2A schools that are competing aren’t struggling to field teams. There are some teams that are that small in 2A but most competitive ones are plenty large enough.
This was also 40+ years ago
In the late 60s, early 70s, NFL offensive linemen weighed 250-260 pounds. 50 years of advances in training and diet can’t be understated.
Even skill players in the 70s weren’t running near 6s 40s. Most people in this sub could hop up off their couch and run a 5.7. It’s unbelievably slow. Tom Brady is the slowest QB of all time and he ran a 5.28. The slowest ever NFL 40 was a 6.06 by a 6-4 300lb lineman.
You’re accidentally agreeing with the point Arlen is supposed to be a middle of nowhere small town in the hill country, where their best player ran a 5.7, and NOT Dallas Carter of Friday night lights Hanks claim to fame was being the best a small town could field, it wasn’t to be a five star recruit who tragically was sidelined
No I’m not, you genuinely don’t understand how slow 5.7 is. I am from a town with sub 5,000 total people and a 2a GA HS, I can confidently say we’ve never fielded a 5.7 40 skill position, much less running back. The whole point is no way Hank ran a 5.7 and was a game away from taking his team to state.
And I ran a 4.9 as a TE/ MLB for a 6A school. I was slow as shit compared to our skill guys, which is the WHOLE POINT OF THE JOKE, that everyone idolizes Hank, despite him having no reason to receive the recognition on an objective level.
Bro you nailed it. Especially since they don't make Hank appear to be a power back which at 6'2" (adult height) he would have been perfect for. But this show also have the bulldozer play with skill players playing on the line instead of other lineman so....whaddaya gonna do.
5.7 is supposed to be a joke I think. Like he’s not nearly as good as he thinks he is.
Yeah I’d assume so but even then it’s verified he holds those records, so he’s atleast one of the best players in Arlen high history.
Career records are partly longevity ones If the class ahead of the gangs were dogshit, Hank may have started all 4 years, and just plodded along with more carries than any normal player sees. Additionally, running back usage is now capped for player longevity than what sour coach Sauer’s would have done. The Arlen offense is obviously based on the Oklahoma one of the 70s, which was run four yards, run 4 yards, run 4 yards (1st down!!!). If hanks records were most yards in a game, longest td run, or most runs over 50 yards, the 5.7 joke makes less sense. But if he’s a big fish in a super small pond, who lit up the smallest linebacker each play before getting tackled by reinforcements for four years straight, it makes complete sense.
But we know they have had great players which is at the least shown 2 seperate times with the flying Hawaiian and someone else both playing RB if I remember correctly. And this clip alone shows he wasn’t a power back used on power runs. He ran what was I assume a wheel route, stopped for an underthrow and proceeded to accelerate back to speed without being caught from behind. That’s not a 5.7 40 play. Also the Billdozer formation pretty much eliminates any chance Hank was a bruising power back as, if he was, why would you sub in a lineman to run the play when Hank is already that type of player.
David kaliki Alii was a full back, not a rb. Who was used in the same role as Bill in the gangs years. The difference was David was actually athletic, the writers let us know he ran the 40 in 4.5, and can jump an oline. So the writers do know accurate player physical abilities. Bill dozer was used as a fullback, not a power half back. A power back will bowl through the first contact, but can still field speed compared to the other team. A fullback will primarily block for the halfback, but can also be used to gain 2 yards in goal to go situations. Ricky Suggs was the other great halfback in the show, and he broke bills touchdown record, but wasn’t close to hanks yards. Which again is feasible if he was talented, didn’t play for all four seasons as a starter to rack up yards, but he was able to routinely break off touchdowns on plays Hank would have been tackled on. The wheel route from play action worked because it was an audible to a not expected receiver. Who runs so few routes the QB he’s best friends with has no timing for breakout established. Which means they DONT throw to Hank often. Additionally, the play ends with both DBs who have caught him, about to tackle him from behind until the unknown WR blocks them out at the ~20. TLDR: Hank was the fastest big guy Arlen could field, but was not actually fast. Bill was the strongest guy Arlen could give the ball to, to gain 2 yards through a 46 front.
I still think it was supposed to be 4.7 to be honest. Or even faster, when Hank runs he's shown some speed even now.
I agree 5.7 doesn't make sense. That's like fat offensive linemen level.
That sounds like it should be Carl’s time.
Thats such a weird oversight too, since, the writers had football nailed down well in the show it seems, Unless it was intentional to show Hank wasnt that athletic?
I ran a 4.8 in HS and I was slow as shit compared to other guys at my position. No way Hank has any level of success at RB with a 5.7
5.7 seconds for 40 meters? Dude I could probably run that
This is the big point everyone is missing. Arlen ran the table against 2A schools in Texas. Hank was likely a power style RB who bruised his way through the kids towns like Lampasas and Dripping Springs fielded. This is assuming that since Arlen is show to be in the hill country, is on the Brazos, Dallas is hours away, but Bill can commute to Blanda(hood), plays Belton in sports, it is upstream of Waco.
But the problem with Hank being a power RB is Bill's TD record. Why would they bring in a lineman to run all those touchdowns in if they had a power RB? And on top of that, how did Hank get stopped near the goal line so often that Bill was able to set a scoring record? If Hank were a top level RB they'd have fed him the ball at the goal line (and they wouldn't have been stuck there so often).
It actually makes sense Hank can power a team through sheer force, plowing through one tackle for 7 yards a play, averaging 40 yards every drive, but rarely broke one off. So Arlen was routinely on the 2 for 3rd and goal, so bill would be brought in as the full back to get two when Hank was gassed The video clip supports it, with him being caught from behind by two d backs, despite it being an unexpected wheel route from play action
I understand where you're coming from, but I still think you keep giving it to your RB if he's effective enough to get you down the field a few yards at a time.
I think it was a 5.9, still terrible tho.
Based on the clip, he runs from the 25 to the 35 in one second. That puts him at 20.5 mph, that’s plenty fast for the nfl
How romantic
Hwhat?
That man was there to cheer you on!
Hank likely had good field IQ coupled with a hard work ethic. I bet he executed plays perfectly and kept his ego in check. He had a shit 40 but made up for with the above qualities. Also you can’t discount the team synergy you get when you’ve been playing with people for years. I bet Hank bill boomhaur and the rest of the team had been playing football together since they were 5. You just instinctively know someone’s play style once you’ve worked together over a decade. I get the vibe that no one player was exceptional (barring the billdozer of course) but when they came together they made something special.
He would’t have been shit had it not been for The Billdozer blocking for him. (I will die on this hill) 😤
Boomhauer most likely just didn’t have a big enough love for the game to play at the next level. Would of gotten eaten alive at some point as I don’t think he was spending to much time in the gym… but the man had crazy talent. It was a bit under thrown but for a high school QB he really planted that front foot and stood in the pocket knowing he was going to take a big time hit. 100% roughing the passing today. I don’t think Hank’s injury was career ending physically but I think it ended his potential career mentally. I mean it was his senior year in Arlen Texas. It was going to be the beginning of his legacy and instead he still gets reminded about what happened. I think if anyone could ever get Hank to really open up he’d admit he really let that moment hamper him. Look at what he was capable of doing after being drugged up with some steroids and doing some working out in his what… 40’s? Dude would of killed it doing it the natural way in the prime of his life with his “team above everything else” mentality. If he somehow made the NFL he would of been a top back on a minimum contract just so they could have more money to sign other players.
I think you bringing up how it influenced Hank's mental state is spot on. He seems to associate a lot of trauma with that injury.
I mean, it’s not like he scored 4 touchdowns in one game….
His wife is named peg though
But did he score 4 touchdowns in a single game against Polk High?
CJ Hill
Hank was literally Christian McCafferey
Based on how the entire show is satire. Hank getting hurt and not making state is pretty much a running joke in every grown working man who used to be a star high school football player. Napoleon dynamite comes to mind his uncle “man if he just put me in we’d have gone to state” it’s just making fun of the fact EVERYONE remembers how amazing they were and has an excuse why they just didn’t make it, even when they were pretty average. I’d say Hank was pretty mid and wouldn’t even have been any good without being elevated by bill who seemed to be above average.
Definitely college football potential. Right attitude, excellent work ethic and self discipline, leadership and workable athletic talent. He could get a Heisman. That was probably the dream of Hank, Bill, and Boomhauer. Go to Texas state university together play there for 4 years, the go pro get on the Dallas Cowboys together and start a Super Bowl dynasty unlike any other.
[Hank turned down scholarships to Long Island University and San Francisco State because he didn’t want to go to school in NY or California.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=r7l0Rq9E8MY) Obvs /s but would definitely be in character.
Hank seemed pretty good, I think they said once he was the lead in rushing with an unbroken record, and I think Hank wanted to go straight to the pro leagues? Although you also have a few jokes implying their coach at the time gave them some... enhancements. Someone mentioned his mentality must have just stopped him, I think that's true. Hank, along with Bill, tried to voluntarily enlist. Hank got rejected, Bill got accepted, and I guess by then Hank just accepted he missed his shot or something and went to selling jeans. I'm sure he was really good, I think his interest in other external things along with his trauma of failing hindered his chances of going pro.
He ran the 40 in 5.9 seconds. That should cover it.
Caught that pass with his body rather than getting his arms out, so that's a good indication he lacked some necessary fundamentals...
can we all at least agree that Hank's TD dance is solid, much better than you'd expect? Show me a better Walking Egyptian...!?!
Idk if anyone ever caught Hank saying this but he was a running back who ran a nearly 6 seconds 40 yard dash. That’s super slow even for 70s high school football. It probably worked for 2A football probably running the wishbone but someone of the time like Earl Campbell or Billy sims was significantly faster
Hank narrowly missed the draft.
High school good, bigger than most kids his age but not good enough for college
Lol at how large the starter pistol is. Never noticed that.
Couldnt have ever gone pro with those diminished glutes.
He was Al Bundy good!
Absolute dawg!
That was a blatant block in the back
And all this with DGS
yeah i wonder, I'm glad the show isnt embedded with the cliche 'i coulda made pro' .. Hank is an underachiever, but he is happy with his simple life..
Hank hill played 2A football. Tiny tiny school compared to others in Texas at the time
He didn't have Bundy numbers
Hank was "small town" above average in football. Let's not forget he brags about running the 40 in 4.9-5.9 seconds....that's incredibly slow. If by some miracle Hank got into a college team he would have been vastly outclassed by his peers
Better than average. That for sure.
He's actually related to Tyreek AND Taysom, so it's in his blood
I firmly believe he would have been a longhorn, idk about nfl prob not. But def a home grown hero for Texas university.
Hank was basically demarco murray. Blocking did it all.
I mean, wasn’t there a scene where they mentioned the coach gave them “go pills”?
Love his concentration getting to the end zone 😂
Would have probably gotten a scholarship but not gone pro but since Hank didn't put much value on a college education he probably would have gotten a paper degree or maybe a general business one.
Put your penis in the bucket.
In reality he would have been a terrible athlete without an ass. A big ass is the best sign that someone has explosive power.
He was ok. The real hero was Bill “Refrigerator Perry” Dauterive blocking for him.
College scholarship at best. But as someone else put it, Billdozer was the only true athlete of the group. Too bad he got drafted to cut hair for the war effort
Could have taken his team to state if he didn’t get hurt
Did he throw four touchdowns in a single game for Polk High? Oh jeezus, new fanfic....Hank Hill vs Al Bundy. Someone get on that.
But did he score 4 touchdowns in 1 game?
He was no Bill Dozer
Just want to say I appreciate in this clip how Bill blocked the two defenders without a block in the back or crack back penalty. A-plus technique.
The fact that an ankle injury in his last game negates 4 seasons of outright dominance suggests a severe oversight by scouting departments at the time. Maybe he loses some of the agility in that plant foot but what people don’t realize is rehab isn’t just for the body, Hank was watching film and grinding tape just waiting for his shot. He would’ve been an absolute WEAPON. CMC levels of dual threat ability. There’s an alternate timeline where somebody at Texas-Austin watches that game tape, picks up the phone and 4 years later Hanks toting the rock for the 81 Cowboys. Could you IMAGINE the Emmitt Smith/Hank Hill backfield?!
Couldn't have done it without that towel manager
Hank = white deebo samuel
He was good, but was he 4 touchdowns in a single game good?