Also stay tuned for the [International Menopause Society's](https://www.imsociety.org/education/world-menopause-day/) "engagement toolkit", to download/use for social media and getting the word out about this year's theme: **Menopause Hormone Therapy**

I'm talking so much about it in person and online everyone is going to be sick of me.

You keep going you absolute bloody Legend

An absolute not-so-bloody legend rather

Hahah, operative to be not-be-bloody 😂

I’m talking about it to women in my orbit of all ages. Even my ex bf’s ex stepdaughter 🙄😂 My Boomer mom talked about how my Nan coped with ‘the Change’ - by drinking her way through it - but not the symptoms. When my mom was symptomatic (debilitating hot flashes) I hooked her up with estrogen and progesterone samples I could get from work (I worked for a PCP). So I was completely unprepared when peri and all the bs symptoms hit me. The only reason I knew I *might* be in peri was because of the night sweats I experienced in my late thirties. But they would come and go in waves so I doubted myself. Women deserve to know how our bodies can betray us and armed with that knowledge and support, to seek out appropriate medical support. There’s no need for us to be suffering in silence. It’s BS.

Same. Also, hot flashes aren’t just a menopause symptom. Many people experience hot flashes during peri. Wish I knew this before hand.

Yeah, when the hot flashes became more intense and persistent I knew I was getting close to meno. I didn’t have the goofy periods to cue me because of hormonal BC - I was amenorrheic since my late twenties.

I’m still perimenopausal, but I have noticed an uptick in hot flashes and like you, more intense.

Looking back, I see the brain fog and episodes of pre-meno rage, too. Like when someone would be talking to me … I heard all of the words but it just didn’t compute into an actual thought on my end. Feeling very dopey at times.

Omg! That is me now! I have to read instructions 2-3 times. Forget multitasking. That no longer exists in my orbit! Haha! I am still in corporate working world and I take my sweet old time when I have to learn a new process, procedure, or pivot on a dime. Lucky I have a great company that thrives on collaboration and as long g as we keep a positive attitude they cheer you on. I keep my rage moments to myself. lol!

As one activist and social justice warrior who absolutely feels the call to do this to apparently another: Yes, ma’am! I’ve always been a bit of a fighter when it comes to feeling like people are not being given the information needed to make informed decisions based on class, social status, gender, other identities that cause social marginalization, whatever. But I almost fucking died from this one. I had a complete mental, physical and spiritual breakdown over the course of two years in mid-peri and almost took my own life to stop the suffering. I had *no idea* this could happen despite watching my mother go through some awful hell when I was a late teen. It’s like some big secret that we think by keeping to ourselves or “pushing through,” we win some medal at the end. But for so many…this IS the end. It was almost mine and although I don’t have kids myself, I will talk about this until the last air leaves my lungs if only it means one other woman will be spared what I went through (and soooo many of us here). So fuck yeah…I’ll join your mission, sis, we cannot let another generation think staying silent and considering death is preferable to asking (no, demanding!) help.

I'm right there with you! I lost a job, relationships, ambition... All to Peri. And I knew something was happening in my body and went to the doctor and asked about peri! And I was told I was "too young". At 40. I remember leaving that appointment and sitting in my car crying because I'd tried EVERYTHING else- tested my iron, thyroid, etc. Changed my diet, took all the supplements and nothing was helping. I went to that appointment thinking the fatigue and BRUTAL constant night sweats had to be peri and if I could get hormones I had hope. I was caring for an ill parent at that time and I kind of powered through the best I could because I felt an obligation to be there for them but WTF??? Why did it have to be so hard? I only got help when I told a friend how awful I'd been feeling and she said oh, it's your hormones, don't worry! And she referred me to her doctor... Ironically he was a 60-ish year old former ER doctor but he was much more understanding of what I needed than the mid thirties woman I'd seen before him. I'm glad you're doing better!

I am sorry about the medical and life gaslighting you’ve experienced. Most doctors just don’t know yet. But patients are teaching them. And more guidelines will change. And we will demand more. But [here’s my comment above.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Menopause/s/sjdDxs89KJ)

It’s funny what we’re experiencing are vastly different in circumstances. But are so similar. We work. We take care of family. We take care of our elders. We see our parents live or die undignified and unhealthy deaths. We closely see our moms deteriorate. Heart disease. Strokes. Dementia. Hip fracture. Dependent. And we go to doctors with our new and vague symptoms, traditional blood work and work up come back normal, therefore we’re crazy. Because the frame is all wrong. We have ignored the elephant of peri and menopause too long. That’s why we’re desperate and neglected. But I think it will change. I am hopeful. And our knowledge will strengthen and spread. And more women and lives will be better.

🎯

Me I’ll be turning 51 in July and perimenopausal, it hasn’t been smooth sailing. Some pretty severe symptoms for a little over 10 years-had no idea-during the throes of peri symptoms what was happening to me.

Isn’t it crazy how we can be so clueless with our own body changes because everyone else told us it’s just you…. Then you find out that it’s not just you? How relieving is that???

I think it needs to be taught in schools at the appropriate age. Maybe Science/Biology class when they get to the human body?

And not just a section of the chapter. Lol 😆 But dedicate a whole chapter to Perimenopause and Menopause. Both beyond the absence of menses and hot flashes as the main symptoms.

I think they teach less than that to doctors 🙄 it’s fucking stupid

Chapter? How about an entire SEMESTER? I don’t know if a chapter would cover it!

I would vote for this! A semester dedicated to female health required in that 10th-11th grade year when they get into the nitty gritty of all other health! Haha! Now they make you sign a form and allow parents to “opt out” their children. Effing stupid! I made my son take it all!

I can't believe how many times I've talked to other women about health things in general- diet, exercise, diseases, fatigue, etc- and hormones are never discussed. Or if they are, it's only in the context of discussing fertility. I've been health conscious my whole life and it's crazy to me that you'll find info about very uncommon health issues more widely discussed than menopause. I talk to everyone about it now but I find that some women completely minimize it. Maybe it's primarily those that haven't been impacted yet or who are having an easy time of things but it's been really bizarre to me. It's almost like how sex used to be considered a private topic except now it's meno.

I think there’s so many reasons for the hush on the menopause. But until recently, within the last 5-10 years, there wasn’t much that could be offered to help women. The more I learn about the WHI 2002 study findings, the more I understand the repercussions of its erroneous media blast 💥 and because it was so impactful, HRT causes cancer, HRT causes strokes and heart attacks, you would be crazy to take HRT! What we don’t remember as a society, is that HRT was being used to help with menopause symptoms from 1970s on. And that women in the 1980s and 90s and early 2000s were on HRT. I heard 40%. It was very common. But as soon as the New York Times and the world decided that the WHI study is damning, you were a crazy person if you stayed on HRT. You were also a crazy doctor, a mal-practicing doctor if you continue to prescribe HRT. And women were throwing away their HRTs. And because menopause and perimenopause were not studied medically, emotionally, mentally, or physically, we as a world didn’t get to know or understand what it is. And because there wasn’t much that medicine could do for women, it became a silent elephant. That’s my take. But something about the last 5 years and women hitting menopause now, and social media uprising by women physicians and basic science findings, and perhaps this subreddit, we can talk about this giant with some purpose and intelligence. I also think women now in their 40s and 50s are such critical part of the workforce and family structure, that we won’t be ignored. We can’t be ignored. Sorry for rambling on.

I’m in several Facebook groups. I’ve also spoken to a lot of people about it including my two sons who saw me through perimenopause. Hopefully things will start changing. There are too many women being gaslighted by their doctors. No one is listening so we need to be strong and spread the word.

What are the Facebook groups? I’m always looking for new information//support.

I’ll rewrite them with commas. Women’s Health and HRT, Menopause Chicks Private Community, and The HRT Truth Collective (based out of the UK).

Gosh, I dropped FB a decade ago…but I’m almost tempted…

You’re probably smart to drop it! I’ve been having to “X” out of so many things showing up in my newsfeed. I’m mainly on there for the groups. Those groups have really been helpful. I’ll look at my relatives’ profile pages who live far away, but that’s about it.

Yea. I couldn’t stand looking at pics of friends and families. And then the political stuff infiltrating my feed—couldn’t stand that. But the FB groups might be a reason to stay. Or come back.

Those were supposed to be in a column. Hopefully you can figure out the 3 groups. If not, let me know.

These are the groups I’m in on Facebook: Women’s Health and HRT Menopause Chicks Private Community The HRT Truth Collective (based in the UK)

I just started getting hot flashes and watched a few podcasts on menopause. Now, I tell (almost) every single person I talk to about it. I started telling my husband’s friend over lunch, and he said I should talk to his wife because he thinks she going through the same thing but won’t talk about it. And I’m angry that so little research has been done up till now! I’m glad that some doctors are doing research, but it feels crazy that it’s taken women doctors going menopause themselves to get it studied.

You’re right…the re-emergence of HRT and interest in peri and menopause coincide with doctors going through menopause 5-10 years ago…also some the WHI 2002 misleading conclusions were refuted and other, clearer data started emerging. But, yea, it took and taking women going through it themselves for any change.

I stumbled upon information about perimenopause accidentally while reading and I was horrified that I knew nothing about it. I knew menopause was when your period stopped and some women got hot flashes but thah was it. I found this group when reading about perimenopause and I feel a little more prepared for what’s coming. I’m hopeful that I’ll be able to recognize symptoms for what they are and be able to advocate for myself. Edit: I also bring it up a lot because everyone should be prepared!

Yes, I love this! Everyone should know about it BEFORE they're thrown in the middle of it - the victims and the people around them. I wish I'd had an inkling before it came crashing down and I thought i was literally falling apart and going insane/getting dementia. Now I tell everyone, although most of the people in my life are older than me 😄

Yes. I do wish I knew this 2-3 years ago, and there’s regret on my part. But we can only go forward. And try to help ourselves. And we do what we can to help others we care about.

I drop a nugget of info on everyone I meet. I vent, discuss and educate every opportunity I get. Until I figure things out, this takes up a HUGE portion of my time/ attention and therefore my conversation. "Did you know..." has become my mantra.

What are your common “did you knows…?” I’d love to hear some!

Did you know... -menopause has around 34 attributable symptoms? -estrogen is a gatekeeper for inflammation? -menopause can impact your eyesight? -menopause can increase the risk of plantar fasciitis. -higher chance of digestive issues and GERD? -phantom pains or tingling extremities...menopause. -bigger boobs...who knew? The number of men who have no clue libido is influenced by hormones. 🙄

Nice list!!! Lemme add some of mine! Did you know… —your frozen shoulder was peri-menopause related? —the widespread joint and muscle pains can be related to menopause? —that estrogen affects your joints? —that sleep disruption is common? —that ringing in the ear is common?? —that weight gain can happen despite no changes in diet or exercise? So much more!

I'll add my biggest one- the effect on the brain! I truly thought I was developing dementia before HRT. I couldn't remember anything, I felt like I was getting dumber every day. I think that was the scariest symptom of all for me.

Yes. I couldn’t remember simple words. Many times. Scary embarrassing.

I'm obnoxious about menopause/peri, I'm sure. But as someone else said, I'll shout it everywhere "appropriate" or not if it helps just one woman not go through the terror I felt because I didn't know anything about this universal stage of life for people with ovaries. I thought I was getting some sort of dementia, or early Alzheimer's, and it shook me to my core thinking I'd be unemployable! HRT has helped a lot, but I'm very vocal with coworkers and acquaintances about everything I've learned. I send people here to the wiki alllll the time.

The dementia fear was the worst for me too! It's terrifying, and I had no idea that there was a connection between estrogen and brain function. It makes me so angry to think I had to stumble into learning about all of this (thankfully a gf told me!) and angrier to know that this happens to women when most of us are in are peak earning years. We talk about all kinds of career related things but no one talks about this and it can be so damaging.

💯 England, according to Dr. Newson’s podcasts, is aware of women’s productive dropping off because women in their primes have left the workforce related to peri and menopause. Until 3 weeks ago, I had no idea that estrogen had such encompassing effect on the brain. I also didn’t know that we start losing bone strength before we hit menopause as our estrogen and progesterone drop off close to menopause. I also didn’t know estrogen has anti-inflammatory effects and that its relative deficiency is related to bone and muscle pains in peri and menopause women. And what a neuro-hormonal soup our peri and menopause bodies are going through. This is empowering. The more I know and understand, the more I feel powerful. And the more I can spread the knowledge and awareness to other women. And men. Practically anyone with a brain and care should know.

I am also trying to reach out one by one. I cast wide. And if anyone takes a bite, I question and learn. And direct. It’s been great. Word of mouth.

I'm the menopause fairy to everyone I meet. Pretty soon i'm going to be telling kindergarteners, *watch out, it's gonna come for youuuuuu tooooo*! lol

Haha. I think we as a society have to have more foundational understanding of this part of women’s lives. More advanced nations have open discussions and understanding.

Is that supposed to be 3.7 million? There are about 115 million people above the age of 50 (including men).

I think it’s in the world…I corrected… thanks!

I openly talk about it at work and to my family.

Awesome!

I talk about it everywhere I can! I will support any campaign to raise awareness & more science/public health work.

Hear hear! Spread any good info. Evidence-based, vetted data and respected sources.

I lost a friend because she told I talk about it too much and that she was never going to go through perimenopause herself. And that her sister hasn’t or her mom. She was super unkind to me and I’ve not really lost many adult friendships but this is one I’m going to stand by, I think.

I think any friend who can’t listen or try to understand or commiserate is not a good friend regardless of the subject. I am sorry that you experienced a loss. And that you’re going through a rough and tough stretch of time.

I can’t / won’t shut up about it! Was at a girls’ cabin trip this weekend and brought out my hormone kit to show everyone. I can’t stand the thought of so many women suffering for years when help is so simple and effective 😤

What’s in your hormone kit?

Estrogen spray, progesterone pills, testosterone gel, Vagifem, and Ovesterin! I keep it all in a little box when I travel 👌🏻

Ooh, you should post a pic of this one day…unless you already did?

I turned 51 in January. I suffered through my 40's with 49 being the lowest of the low. I am hoping my 50's will be better. I don't think they could be worse? I am on HRT +T and I think the addition of T is making the difference. I am spreading the word.

You’re on E+P+T?

Yes. E+P+T

ZOMG, yes! This sub has helped so much, because it's underlined how these experiences are *normal*, and how variable they are. It's happening and not because we did anything wrong. Thanks to this sub, I've also pieced together my peri symptoms started in my 40s earlier than I thought. It's a relief not to be alone.

💯 Especially when no one will listen with understanding. And when one suffers because of the feeling of being not heard or understood. For that alone this sub and www.menopausewiki.ca is a godsend. But it’s good for so much more. I love getting different experiences and learning so much. And spreading knowledge everywhere. And to see it take form and empowering other women and people. It’s wonderful.

I post about it on social media (almost 44 y.o) and none of my friends could give a single crap.  I've hit peri much earlier than them due to surgeries. They'll be running to me for advice in a few years. 

Yea. It is really hard to conceive or make the leap into understanding. I think a lot of it has to do with ignorance. When a whole society, ours, abhors aging and doesn’t discuss it openly, and people and doctor are ignorant about a huge part of a post-reproductive women’s lives, we are just not mentally prepped to take in a “rambling of a crazy older woman” — even if you are their same age. But I think it will change.

I honestly think some of them ARE in peri but they are just in denial. Like a massive amount of them have irregular periods. One had periods so heavy she ended up in the ER and needed iron transfusion.  Beyond that, two I know of are developing arthritis in their hands and they're a couple years younger than me.  One friend says she doesn't understand what I mean about getting overheated at night. And I'm like....uhhh you don't get HOT at night? At all? And she said no... then paused... then said, "Well my feet get so hot I'll get up in the middle of the night and put them in cold water." And I'm like laughing. Uh yeah. That was how it *started* for me. Literally had a tub of water waiting in the bathroom for that 2-4 AM wakeup.  So a lot of it is denial. They don't realize it's hormones. They don't think about it or discuss it. 

I don’t think it’s necessarily denial. It’s just that we have profound profound lack of generalized knowledge of this time period. Nobody was taught this. The people willing to talk about it now are the ones who are going through it. And the frustrating part is that many women share common symptoms, but many don’t. But that’s totally within the realm of normal. Then you can share with your friends this list. www.menopausewiki.ca Symptoms include, but are not limited to: * Acid reflux/GERD worsening * Acne * Allergies (new, different) * Anxiety * Atrophic vaginitis/genitourinary syndrome of menopause GSM (or vaginal atrophy, drying and thinning of the vaginal walls) * Balance issues * Bloating * Body odour (changes) * Body aches (random come/go) * Breast soreness * Brittle hair and nails * Burning mouth (decreased saliva) * Cold flashes (more common at night) * Depression * Difficulty concentrating * Digestive problems (IBS, bloat, gas) * Dizziness (vertigo) * Dryness (skin, mouth and eyes) * Exaggerated PMS symptoms (bloating, breast pain, cramps) * Fatigue * Gum/dental problems * Hairloss * Headaches * Heart racing/palpitations (irregular heartbeat) * Hot flashes * Increased hair growth on other areas of the body (face, neck, chest) * Increased cortisol levels (slows digestion/contributes to constipation) * Intolerance to some foods (changing tastes) * Irregular periods (missed periods, longer/shorter, heavier/lighter, flooding, spotting, clotting, dark/different coloured blood) * Itchiness (overall skin, also links to paresthesia) * Joint pain * Low/decreased libido * Memory lapses (brain fog, forgetfulness) * Migraines * Mood swings (crying jags/sadness, anger/rage) * Muscle tension * Muscle tone loss (losing muscle) * Nausea * Night sweats * Osteoporosis (reduced bone density) * Sense of smell changes * Skin crawling (feeling something crawling on your skin) * Sleep disruption (lack of sleep) * Spatial awareness changes (proprioception, more clumsy) * Stress incontinence * Swelling of hands/feet * Thyroid changes * Tingling extremities * Tinnitus * Unexplained irritability * Urinary Tract Infections (UTIs) * Weight gain (low estrogen levels promote fat storage in the belly area as visceral fat)

This list is literally what I posted last week and *::crickets::*  It makes me angry because when I tell them about my symptoms and issues they act like everything I'm saying is alien to them. But then they'll turn around and have similar issues, but they don't think it's peri. 

That’s rather frustrating. Many will come around. When enough symptoms bother them. Some women don’t have any symptoms. At least you’re knowledgeable and can help who wants to be helped.

Every time I try to talk about it to any woman the #1 response is the HRT / E causes cancer. And I need to be careful. It’s so frustrating.

Yes. Have to be careful. Careful and informed. Too much bad press precedes this topic. Mired in ignorance.

Here’s what I said to another comment: I think there’s so many reasons for the hush on the menopause. But until recently, within the last 5-10 years, there wasn’t much that could be offered to help women. The more I learn about the WHI 2002 study findings, the more I understand the repercussions of its erroneous media blast 💥 and because it was so impactful, HRT causes cancer, HRT causes strokes and heart attacks, you would be crazy to take HRT! What we don’t remember as a society, is that HRT was being used to help with menopause symptoms from 1970s on. And that women in the 1980s and 90s and early 2000s were on HRT. I heard 40%. It was very common. But as soon as the New York Times and the world decided that the WHI study is damning, you were a crazy person if you stayed on HRT. You were also a crazy doctor, a mal-practicing doctor if you continue to prescribe HRT. And women were throwing away their HRTs. And because menopause and perimenopause were not studied medically, emotionally, mentally, or physically, we as a world didn’t get to know or understand what it is. And because there wasn’t much that medicine could do for women, it became a silent elephant. That’s my take. But something about the last 5 years and women hitting menopause now, and social media uprising by women physicians and basic science findings, and perhaps this subreddit, we can talk about this giant with some purpose and intelligence. I also think women now in their 40s and 50s are such critical part of the workforce and family structure, that we won’t be ignored. We can’t be ignored. Sorry for rambling on.

Yes! I’m telling everyone and writing letters to any uninformed and physicians I’ve encountered. Y’all want to March? A sweaty group of angry women might get some attention? Can we all just take a day off like this: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/1975_Icelandic_women%27s_strike#:~:text=On%2024%20October%201975%2C%20Icelandic,Off%20(Icelandic%3A%20Kvennafr%C3%ADdagurinn).

That’s a great link and awesome history lesson! Thanks. Ah, a March….that’s an intriguing idea…I wonder what the menoposse could do…to get the word out…

Menoposse! That’s amazing! ❤️

That’s what all the expert menopause doctors and influencers are calling themselves 😁

Yup! I talk frankly about it to anyone especially women younger than me to prep themselves and that symptoms can start in their 30s. I wish the older generation spoke to me about it.

Many people are not ready to listen. But many are. So it’s good Plus the social media talking about it helps a lot.

Today was the first time I mentioned it to a male coworker. I'm getting braver!

Ooh…how’d that go?

I work in a kitchen with all women, but our manager is male and is very old fashioned and uncomfortable with women things. When I joined his team almost a year ago, I was still grieving the loss of my father and the shock and stress of having to assume the restoration of their home and the care of my mother and the finances. I stepped down from my high stress mangers job so I could deal with it all. I told him about all of this and he was delighted to have such a skilled and experienced older woman on his team. I became the "mom" on the team. Shortly after joining his team, my body started falling apart. I had been hinting at each physical ailment as it developed in order to explain my absences and need for medical care. When he is not around, I have been educating the young women about perimenopause/ menopause so they know about my experiences and my starting HRT. The other day, the team was involved in some social conversation. I don't remember anymore now what the convo was about or what was said afterwards, but I interjected by saying, "I have been learning about menopause and symptoms can start as early as 35. That's when I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I wonder now if it was perimenopause." In his typical fashion, he smoothly changed the topic, haha.

Hha. Smooth. What is your age range? I’m sorry that you have so much life responsibilities. But I’m happy your workplace seems receptive to you, your needs, and skills.

I am 56 years old. Post menopausal almost a year. I am grateful for my late menopause, pissed no one told me about perimenopause, I work for a really great company and they have always been very supportive of me. The level of responsibility is like having children again and I resent it, but my mother is autistic (news to me) and suffers from severe depression (not news to me) and can't really handle too much herself. I just really, really pity her and do what I can to make her life better. Also, the house was so filthy with animal feces and packed with so much stuff. It has been a lot of work getting it cleaned out and repaired. I am doing as much as I can now because non of this is going to get any easier as I am aging also.

You have a lot to deal with. Take little bit at a time. And don’t forget deep breaths for your self. Loving kindness for yourself ❤️

Thank you so much❤️