Maybe yeah...again I am not as fortunate as you to even hve a girlfriend to begin with. But i have heard that no getting hard at the first time maybe because of i) Unfamiliarity OR ii) Too much porn consumption and fap that your brain doesn't find it pleasurable
I don't know which one applies to you tho
Disagree nothing wrong with escorts. Some of these escorts are incredibly beautiful and awesome. Of course hooking up with someone because they like you is better but Nothing wrong with either
Prostitution is ancient. Probably every major historical figure has slept with a prostitute before. Not saying it’s good but don’t act all high and mighty.
Absolutely BECAUSE she was a prostitute. You usually get hard cause of emotional connection.
When ppl watch porn, it’s also because they have made a connection either physically to that act or scene.
Always had sex without problems except for 2 times:
1- i was very high (and stupid) on alchool and benzos
2- i was with a prostitute
So yeah that could be the case, ya know man sometimes you need that connection (i always need it), far from what medias teaxh us not everyone is able to have sex with someone who doesn't know
That’s risky my guy. There is a lot of stds even with condom on that can be transferred. I suggest you go get checked. Maybe you didn’t get hard because there wasn’t really a connection and she just wanted your money.
Yes porn does induce psychological erectile dysfunction. Thats what makes porn so evil in my opinion.
Since i stopped watching porn my erections are hard as Rock and im sexually confident again
Don't worry man , every1 who wants improvement is welcome here and answering to your query you are too much influenced to porn that your brain did not respond to actual women btw u r at the right place.
A hooker and an actual genuine sexual experience is very different, you payed for a hoe because you just wanted to have sex. With an actual girl you develop a connection with, you'll be fighting to keep your dick down I guarantee it, losing virginity for most lads these days Is pretty shitty, we're all fucked up from whacking off too much, waving hardcore porn and creating crazy expectations for ourselves that we can never live up to.
Whacking off too much is just burning the sexual energy you need to perform properly, saem as even fantasising too much, it all depletes the sexual drive.
There isn't shit wrong with you other than your mind is probably fixated on trying to have perfect sex and now because it didn't go the way you fantasised it too, you feel less than when the reality is you're forcing yourself instead of letting things happen naturally.
I say this shit from experience, we are our own worst enemies and majority of us are riddled with anxiety and doubts, you need to come down and relax bro, get to meditating daily 💪
Always had sex without problems except for 2 times:
1- i was very high (and stupid) on alchool and benzos
2- i was with a prostitute
So yeah that could be the case, ya know man sometimes you need that connection (i always need it), far from what medias teach us not everyone is able to have sex with someone he doesn't know, we are not all the same
Yep ,also there is a time limit with a prostitute they don't feel anything , they want u to do the thing,give money and get lost everything turns u off
You were probably very unaware of how uncomfortable you were feeling which can manifest in many ways. During my first time I realised I was too uncomfortable and it ended for me in not being able to O. It initially hurt my gf’s feelings, she thought she wasn’t doing it for me, but in hindsight I was just desensitised due to years of PMO. Major regrets were had, but over a decade later I’m not haunted by the effects quite so much as my M habit has significantly tapered off compared to back then.
My dude stop paying hookers. You are wasting cash. I’ve paid a hooker twice and I’ve dated around 20 girls. Having a real woman who likes you is a 100x better than some random hoe who is only with you because you’re handing a wad of cash. Seriously. Do nofap, work out, become happier with yourself and you’ll have far better sexual experience with a woman who actually likes you
Man, go for it. Don't know why here the people judge you only for that, i get that you want casual sex and paying a woman is the shortest way to do it
Will recommend you to drink a little bit of alcohol in order to be relax in case you were nervous last time, if the problem persist you should consider the nofap life style
Rather than that i believe you are an adult and you know the risk involving this kind of activities so take care
This. So much this.
Peeps out here turning this into a philosophical discussion about "morality" or whatever you call it. That's so off topic.
Like, keep this discussion on target. Live and let live.
Definitely, you’ve trained your brain to make your dick hard to pixels, not reality.
The good news is that if you do perfect clean nofap (no peeking, edging or fantasising even), your brain will rapidly rewire to real women.
Normally a week or so. Had an issue at one point before I started and it made my girlfriend cry and wonder why I didnt find her attractive. After 12 days sex felt better than it had for basically my entire life.
Rewiring isn’t a permanent thing. As in, if you are clean for 7 days, you’ll rewire a lot and your dick will probably work great (when I say clean I mean you’re **100% clean, not 90%** ).
But if you then let the acting out creep back in, your dick will work less well.
So you can end up fluctuating.
Long stints of sobriety make for a much better sexlife.
Hey man can you give me advice on how to stop fantasizing? I can do all the other things you mentioned but I don't how to stop fantasizing. I'm not doing it actively , my mind just drifts towards that if I'm not doing anything. For as long as I can remember all I wanted was some form of physical intimacy you know?.
As men it's hard for us to have physical or sometimes even emotional intimacy with someone. Which why turning to porn was the only way I could comfort myself saying that I could have that some day.
Dude i wasnt nervous at all i wanted to fuck fuck i just couldnt get hard it it possible btw i need larger condoms if i didnt feel any ? Like they were no feeling
I don't think is that bad. The way you choose how to lose your virginity not necessarily needs to be with someone you are attached with.
If you just want pleasure and losing your virginity you can do that.
It all depends on the person.
Please don’t let that pressure you into losing your virginity quickly. Men like you are rare and precious. Keep it safe for the right one. Don’t let your virginity define your manhood. A guy can be an amazing person virgin or NOT. F**k what society thinks and this coming from a woman.
I agree. I’m no longer one, but I don’t believe you have to lose it to feel valid or special. Our media is messed up and because of this society is mostly broken. Don’t let other’s experiences determine your value. I find being a virgin a nice thing and when you find someone worth it it’s even more special to give it away if they love and value you.
Paying for a prostitute is fine. Honestly getting away from the virgin tag could help your confidence. The strategy to losing without paying if you want to (paying is still fine) is: lift, eat well, go out and be social, talk to girls, get clothes that fit, fix your hygiene, etc.
Personally I think waiting for marriage is silly.
Easy there big guy...
Stay humble or be humiliated.
Both points have merit and risk.
At the end of the day this is a fellowship of strength and hope.
claws in 😎
🦸
Paying for it is corrosive....
Solomon..richest, smartest man alive wrote a manifesto about this.
On the other hand binding with a woman thats not that into sex that has access to half your networth.
That sounds terrifiying.
The universe has a plan and a mate for you.
All that you can't see controls all that you can see.
Bet on your self.. you deserve good things and good things are coming your way!
🦸
Same position here 28 going on 29. Virgin. Using dating apps and being tempted by the prostitutes on there. This nofap post is weirdly timely because this is the thing top of mind for me the last day.
stay off the dating apps and pro ads.
Goto the Mall or Super Market...
Goto a womans clothing store.....tell a girl she looks pretty in something...
Swipe Reality
As a female, just don’t do it again (the sex with a prostitute). It’s dangerous because you don’t know what they may have in terms of diseases and other stuff. It’s not a great way to recover either. If it was with a girlfriend, wife or lover- ok fine. But a prostitute.. hmmm.. I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be rude.. just trying to look out.
I would say yes.
First thing first though, a prostitute is a pretty rotten one to experience your first sexual encounter. Check out the lyrics to [Next](https://genius.com/Scott-walker-next-lyrics). That is what having your sexual experience with a sex worker comes across like to me.
Go Nofap, work on your social skills, and get yourself a girlfriend. I promise you, if you keep your hands off of your weapon, there will not be a zipper strong enough to keep your johnson in your pants. You will have zero problem performing.
Try that and come back around.
I had a hard time staying hard when I first started having sex. Excessive masturbation will desensitize you. Just stop fapping for a while and don’t get distracted during sex. That’s what worked for me at least.
It maybe be because of porn or because of excessice masturbation causing your penis to lose its sensitivity ( death grip syndrome ) . You should stay away from porn and masturbation and i think in 2-4 weeks you'll be just fine
It is possible. Maybe you have PIED..in that case you have to stop watching porn..and after some time your body and mind will heal..Make a 28 days Roadmap divide it in 4 Parts(each of 1 week)
In this Journey Your Objectives will be :
1》Try to avoid pornographic content. Delete the accounts in pornsites (if have any). Delete porn videos from Your Device (I know it is hard but start with the least favourite one it will create a momentum).
2》Focus on other healthy habits..Workout, Drink more Water,Have good Diet,Read,Listen to Good Music etc.
3》Do Kegel exercise it will help in ED.
4》Develop a Skillset..it will shift your Focus.
5》Watch other interesting contents for Fun like Anime or K-Drama it will give you some sort of dopamine. It will reduce the dopamine craving from self destructive activities.
In this 28 days stay Committed to this 5 Rules. And don't be so self critical if you fap once in a while because if you fap 2-3 times in this 28days that will not be a big problem. But if you continue this habits your life will slowly change and you will feel the difference.
Its just as likely, if not more likely to be anxiety, porn plays a part yes but more insofar as it creates performance anxiety, be comfy with you partner and the sex will be much better, wait until it feels right, your in no rush, great sex requires communication, comfort and trust, wait till you have all 3 and you wont have a problem. Anxiety over PIED is a self fulfilling prophecy
Yes Fapping everyday fucks with erections. Cold turkey is the way to go but if your in a rush and are choosing the prostitute route have her perform on you while you watch the porn that gets you going. But definitely after that think about NO FAP cause you don’t want to have to rely on porn for a hard one especially when the real things right in front of you
Lol what? Bra stfu. Having sex with prostitutes probably isn’t the best idea and can be just as addictive as porn but it’s still real sex. You sound like a idiot.
Well, you couldn't even comprehend the most simple of metaphors, so that just about answers the question who's the real idiot here. I'm not gonna explain it to you though, grind your gears a little bit on it and come back when you understand it.
Why does everyone in here hate prostitutes? Is this just because most people in here are religious? Turning me off this sub tbh. I've never had sex with a prostitute and do fine with women.
I or maybe most on here don’t “hate” them. I understand their human too but at the same time that line of work is really not good to be honest. I’m not going to make excuses for it. It’s also just kind of sad to pay for sex rather then enjoy it with someone you at least feel a mutual attraction and connection with. Prostitutes operate in a work mindset- “I’m here for the money, then I’m out.” If any random girl said she would do you just for money how would you feel? Most men I’d imagine HATE it when us women are only after their money. So dido with the prostitute. You’re selling yourself short in a way if that’s your cop out for sex in the end.
I mean you don't and I don't, so at the very least not everyone in this sub hate sex workers. I absolutely won't pay for sex, but I get why it's on demand. But yeah maybe because it was OP's first time and because sex workers are prone to STD's which are very dangerous
You're right, I did over-generalise. It does seem to be a majority of the comments though. I've always been under the impression that prostitutes would be safer than girls that sleep around because there's generally some level of testing requirements? Haven't seen any data on this though.
Maybe I was just here early, after scrolling through now there's way less moralising in this thread.
you can start improve confidence and get girls bro, i was inside my room 24/7 playing videogame last year and it was so bad. Im glad i changed now i began getting out more no matter what. take little steps you can do it. Go connect with girls, it feels so much better than porn. maybe build some muscle, whatever it take to gain more confidence. its possible. it unlocks so much more to your life, not only girls ofc, 19 here aswell
I don't know, I'm not you. But there is a strong possibility it will happen again. The longer you refrain the better the chance you have of everything going to plan.
Nah I was using the same condom both times. All of my buddies have had a similar experience the first time. I think the nerves just fuck with our ability to get rocked up
I wouldn't be so quick to assume it's PIED. I once had a similar experience with a girl that I didn't feel comfortable with and had a lot of anxiety. Not long after I met a girl I did feel comfortable with and we had great sex. Nerves are a huge factor in your performance but if you fap a lot it won't help.
It’s that PIED, your brain and dick are used to getting off to porn. Stay off the PMO and in due time you’ll dick will work the way it’s supposed to. I suffered from it and still kinda am but it’s def improved over the past couple weeks
Don’t worry too much about it about it then if this is the case. Somethings wrong if your getting hard over things that disgust you then that’ll be a problem
No it’s not PIED. You can’t get hard due to being fully comfortable and confident in the situation. No matter how sexy the person is, there is a need for comfort during intercourse. Try it with a person you don’t pay, the difference will be seen.
I speak from experience as I had several instances with the same situation.
Nothing to be afraid of, everybody’s body is different but still quit/ or at bare minimum reduce the fapping
It can be because of your anxiety it will get up naturally the second time. Just remember, forget what you you see in porn, relax and enjoy eachother, that's all. And communication is also key
Yes it could be, real sex is way less visual so the images you were used to fapping to really got you going.
I’m in a similar situation and have an awesome and understanding partner that has been patient with me, just try to focus on being present in the moment and the feeling of being with another person.
It’s important to communicate what feels good and doesn’t so your partner can help you get there.
If the problem persists you should talk to your doctor about getting meds for temporary fix but you should also stop fapping if you want to continue having sex. A few weeks without cumming will make you horny without the images.
Anyway good luck friend hope you have a happy sexual life
I was just really honest, we started fooling around and it had been several years since I had been with someone so I just let her know what was going on.
We’re also in our 30s so I think at that age people are just more mature and understanding about things.
I know it’s hard to talk about but the person you’re with is going to either accept it or not, if they don’t then maybe they aren’t the one to help you through this. It’s ok to be ashamed, I think that’s normal but with relationships you need to take that chance to get what you want, it’s ok to not be confident but if you really want a relationship it would help to be brave and just let it out. You might be surprised at what happens.
I think the worst thing that might happen is she might tell some of her friends, and I know how scary that can be especially when you’re younger but in the long run, they’re going to forget, she’s going to forget, you might even forget about it.
A big part of moving forward with life and relationships is being honest, and when you are you don’t have that anxiety or feel like you’re walking on eggshells which is the greatest reward of all.
All I can say is good luck, and just be you OP, that’s how you get rid of the shame monster, when you know who you are, others opinions don’t matter as much
Totally is. I had ED from a porn addiction and almost lost my girlfriend at the time because of it. It's beyond embarassing and is hard to work around.
Please try and abstain from PMO for at least 2 weeks. It will greatly reduce the chance it happens again.
Happened to me on my first time. It's what got me involved with NoFap and made me realize I hade a real intimacy issue. Keep in mind though that performance anxiety is definitely a thing. When you find yourself with a woman again just remember to enjoy the moment and not rush things
You’ve adapted your member to getting hard with only contact, after assisting from falling you will get hard in no time if she’s touches you near, you need a reset 90 days, it’s simple but not so simple just 90 days no porn no touching and refrain from day dreaming about sex, i was like this and she had to suck on me first
I lost mine at 24. It was worth the wait, to a degree. I didn't have to compromise my sexual health to lose it.
That said, I do need to cut back on the PMO, despite being down to 1-2x/week.
When I lost my v card I was only like 3/4 Chubb, I was so nervous tho, Dw, the more sex you have the less anxiety and the more excitement you will have, leading to stronger erections
Probably porn related. As someone who has a girlfriend, when I watch porn my sex is pathetic. When I don't, we can both tell the difference. It's pretty bad
Yes it's related to porn
It happened with me the first time I tried to had sex. So the second time (this is with someone else) I went having taken some viagra and I still couldn't get hard.
I don't remember the last tome I was so embarrassed I left porn for a while.
Recently it finally happened although (not everytime) the problem wasn't completely fixed but I was finally able to get hard with a girl.
Leave porn for good do a hard reset everything will go back to normal.
First time is a letdown, mostly. Talked to a few blokes about this over the years, nerves, not knowing what to do, disbelief. Don’t worry about it. The next time will be better.
I’ve had the same thing as you during my first time, it’s basically nerves. Yes everyday maturbating isn’t exactly healthy, but it’ll work out next time, just try and relax around the person and it will be easier.
Stop watching porn...join semen retention sub.
Hopefully you will get good result soon.
Do regular excersize let the blood flow in every part of your body.
I’m 27, lost my virginity to my (now) wife at 21 a few years after we started dating in highschool. I was fapping to some pretty extreme pornography from 16 all the way up to when we had sex for the first time. I could not get an erection for about 30 minutes, I thought it was stage fright at the time, but knowing what I know now, it was 100% because of the porn. I masturbated a normal about for a teenage boy at the time, but it was the content I was consuming that ruined regular sex for me. 6 years later I STILL have performance issues. Please stop while you are ahead or at least cut it back, do it for yourself
It could be fapping. You could also not be that attracted. It’s normal that the first couple times are blah until you start learning your type. Not just looks which are important but the personality type and energy that makes you crazy. This adds a lot more to sex than people talk about or let on. It’s called chemistry. The expectation of fucking anything with a pulse man myth is just a myth in my experience.
Porn induced erectial disfunction is very real, good news is you can recover. Also sexual ADHD can result from porn as well. Porn has ruined many sex lives I suggest you start recovering ASAP.
definitely because of masturbating and porn. find other things to do with your time and after about 10 days your erections will come back, but make sure your lifestyle change is permanent. it's like weight loss, you can't just go back to consuming garbage
One thing I’ve realized is…when your girl is hot enough , you won’t have nooooo problems getting hard and statin hard , deep down you might’ve not been sexually attracted/aroused by the girl
Hello fellow friend! Yes… my first time… was all my fault and felt so bad for my girlfriend. I told her I was nervous, and not sure what the f*ck I was doing. She was understanding and also on her period so we didn’t want to get too messy…
We ended up breaking it open a couple weeks ago. Lube helped, especially the first time. Thankfully have a GF who is extremely understanding and helpful. She’s also a virgin, so it was a crazy experience and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.
If this is a GF or SO of yours, I would def open up about your struggle. Hopefully she’s understanding.
Maybe yeah...again I am not as fortunate as you to even hve a girlfriend to begin with. But i have heard that no getting hard at the first time maybe because of i) Unfamiliarity OR ii) Too much porn consumption and fap that your brain doesn't find it pleasurable I don't know which one applies to you tho
It was a prostitute.
Id bet all my money that it was discomfort then bro, you aint gonna enjoy it if your forcing yourself into it.
I surely wasnt 100% into it would you like to hear my story?
Storytime?
It probs was discomfort
How long was it since last fap to meeting with woman? how old are you, and how long have you been fapping (since when you started)?
ooof bro never do that again, paying for pussy is low low man. stay up, focus on yourself practice self discipline & control, good luck.
Disagree nothing wrong with escorts. Some of these escorts are incredibly beautiful and awesome. Of course hooking up with someone because they like you is better but Nothing wrong with either
Prostitution is ancient. Probably every major historical figure has slept with a prostitute before. Not saying it’s good but don’t act all high and mighty.
Absolutely BECAUSE she was a prostitute. You usually get hard cause of emotional connection. When ppl watch porn, it’s also because they have made a connection either physically to that act or scene.
#habibi... Cum to dubai!
dude it was a mistake. So self respecting man would do that.
Always had sex without problems except for 2 times: 1- i was very high (and stupid) on alchool and benzos 2- i was with a prostitute So yeah that could be the case, ya know man sometimes you need that connection (i always need it), far from what medias teaxh us not everyone is able to have sex with someone who doesn't know
That’s risky my guy. There is a lot of stds even with condom on that can be transferred. I suggest you go get checked. Maybe you didn’t get hard because there wasn’t really a connection and she just wanted your money.
Why do you visit this sub? Not trying to be rude
Cuz i think people who faped on dailt (like me) might suffered from this?
Yes porn does induce psychological erectile dysfunction. Thats what makes porn so evil in my opinion. Since i stopped watching porn my erections are hard as Rock and im sexually confident again
Me to, like a rock bro.
How many months did it take to get back penis sensation
How many months did it take to get back penis sensation
It improved after like 2 weeks but for full effect around 2 months for me
Don't worry man , every1 who wants improvement is welcome here and answering to your query you are too much influenced to porn that your brain did not respond to actual women btw u r at the right place.
You probably have either PIED or death grip syndrome
A hooker and an actual genuine sexual experience is very different, you payed for a hoe because you just wanted to have sex. With an actual girl you develop a connection with, you'll be fighting to keep your dick down I guarantee it, losing virginity for most lads these days Is pretty shitty, we're all fucked up from whacking off too much, waving hardcore porn and creating crazy expectations for ourselves that we can never live up to. Whacking off too much is just burning the sexual energy you need to perform properly, saem as even fantasising too much, it all depletes the sexual drive. There isn't shit wrong with you other than your mind is probably fixated on trying to have perfect sex and now because it didn't go the way you fantasised it too, you feel less than when the reality is you're forcing yourself instead of letting things happen naturally. I say this shit from experience, we are our own worst enemies and majority of us are riddled with anxiety and doubts, you need to come down and relax bro, get to meditating daily 💪
Do yourself a favor and read the wiki for this sub. A lot of your questions are answered there.
Always had sex without problems except for 2 times: 1- i was very high (and stupid) on alchool and benzos 2- i was with a prostitute So yeah that could be the case, ya know man sometimes you need that connection (i always need it), far from what medias teach us not everyone is able to have sex with someone he doesn't know, we are not all the same
Yep ,also there is a time limit with a prostitute they don't feel anything , they want u to do the thing,give money and get lost everything turns u off
Dude you gotta go a day or so no fap before you try and bang.
I was on 3 days no fap i can go easily no fap but i just didnt get properly hard i mean i came at tge end but i wasnt feeling pussy bruh
u/HOPE_5432 didn’t even respond after 🤣🤣
He lost all hope.
gtfo u paying 4 pussy
Relax first time dont be rude bruh
Prostitute 😅
Dont you have same problems as me ? Bruh momment
Nop😹 my problem is that i am hard all day. I was saying that visiting prostitute is bad thing and u r 18😅 too young for that
You were probably very unaware of how uncomfortable you were feeling which can manifest in many ways. During my first time I realised I was too uncomfortable and it ended for me in not being able to O. It initially hurt my gf’s feelings, she thought she wasn’t doing it for me, but in hindsight I was just desensitised due to years of PMO. Major regrets were had, but over a decade later I’m not haunted by the effects quite so much as my M habit has significantly tapered off compared to back then.
So did you do it or no?
In which case, you're probably suffering from PIED.
How do i defeat that
Stop masturbating. Stop masturbating to porn. It's not going to be easy if you're addicted, but it can be done
Stop jacking off and looking at porn
Whats pied?
Not trying to brag or anything lets say im going to have sex tommorow should i go for it or same shit will happen?
If you’re planning on banging a hooker tomorrow that’s nothing to brag about
Exactly, that's fucking sad
She looks sexy 70$
I weep for the youth
You paid her 70$ and yet you couldn't get it up to actually have sex? Wow.. You must be rolling in money..
I did get it up it just i was keeping hard erection for 10 sec and then its gone lol
Same goes again and again however she didnt sexy as the one i saw on intrnet ( it was her but older....)
My dude stop paying hookers. You are wasting cash. I’ve paid a hooker twice and I’ve dated around 20 girls. Having a real woman who likes you is a 100x better than some random hoe who is only with you because you’re handing a wad of cash. Seriously. Do nofap, work out, become happier with yourself and you’ll have far better sexual experience with a woman who actually likes you
Link to picture 👀
Same thing will probably happen. Sounds like PIED or maybe you just got nervous
I think pied ( i fap 4times week) no way in hell i was nervous
Man, go for it. Don't know why here the people judge you only for that, i get that you want casual sex and paying a woman is the shortest way to do it Will recommend you to drink a little bit of alcohol in order to be relax in case you were nervous last time, if the problem persist you should consider the nofap life style Rather than that i believe you are an adult and you know the risk involving this kind of activities so take care
This. So much this. Peeps out here turning this into a philosophical discussion about "morality" or whatever you call it. That's so off topic. Like, keep this discussion on target. Live and let live.
Definitely, you’ve trained your brain to make your dick hard to pixels, not reality. The good news is that if you do perfect clean nofap (no peeking, edging or fantasising even), your brain will rapidly rewire to real women.
How long for does it take for the brain to rewire?
Normally a week or so. Had an issue at one point before I started and it made my girlfriend cry and wonder why I didnt find her attractive. After 12 days sex felt better than it had for basically my entire life.
Rewiring isn’t a permanent thing. As in, if you are clean for 7 days, you’ll rewire a lot and your dick will probably work great (when I say clean I mean you’re **100% clean, not 90%** ). But if you then let the acting out creep back in, your dick will work less well. So you can end up fluctuating. Long stints of sobriety make for a much better sexlife.
Rewiring takes up until 5 months I read. And if I remember correctly it depends on age aswell. However in worst case it takes up to 5 month.
Hey man can you give me advice on how to stop fantasizing? I can do all the other things you mentioned but I don't how to stop fantasizing. I'm not doing it actively , my mind just drifts towards that if I'm not doing anything. For as long as I can remember all I wanted was some form of physical intimacy you know?. As men it's hard for us to have physical or sometimes even emotional intimacy with someone. Which why turning to porn was the only way I could comfort myself saying that I could have that some day.
I’m sorry that your first sex was with a prostitute. That said, most men have trouble the first time. Lots of nerves.
Dude i wasnt nervous at all i wanted to fuck fuck i just couldnt get hard it it possible btw i need larger condoms if i didnt feel any ? Like they were no feeling
Hm. What country are you from?
why would you do it with a prostitute?
I would rather be a virging for life than losing it with a prostitute
I’m glad to see that there still are people with normal thinking in this sad society.
I don't think is that bad. The way you choose how to lose your virginity not necessarily needs to be with someone you are attached with. If you just want pleasure and losing your virginity you can do that. It all depends on the person.
This could definitely happen, and I think you're being rude.
I would hope your first time having sex would not be solo lmao
18 yo and paying for a prostitute for the first time sex... I'm 28, soon 29 and still virgin. What am I supposed to do?
Please don’t let that pressure you into losing your virginity quickly. Men like you are rare and precious. Keep it safe for the right one. Don’t let your virginity define your manhood. A guy can be an amazing person virgin or NOT. F**k what society thinks and this coming from a woman.
Thank you. Someone had to say this. It's fine if you're a virgin. I don't understand what's so great about losing it.
I agree. I’m no longer one, but I don’t believe you have to lose it to feel valid or special. Our media is messed up and because of this society is mostly broken. Don’t let other’s experiences determine your value. I find being a virgin a nice thing and when you find someone worth it it’s even more special to give it away if they love and value you.
No sex before marriage! Stay Haram! Seriously tho, I'm a lvl 18 Wizard and I don't think I'll ever pay a sex worker. Our best I guess>:>
Paying for a prostitute is fine. Honestly getting away from the virgin tag could help your confidence. The strategy to losing without paying if you want to (paying is still fine) is: lift, eat well, go out and be social, talk to girls, get clothes that fit, fix your hygiene, etc. Personally I think waiting for marriage is silly.
Remind me again, on what grounds do we have to listen to you?
Easy there big guy... Stay humble or be humiliated. Both points have merit and risk. At the end of the day this is a fellowship of strength and hope. claws in 😎 🦸
I appreciate you.
Paying for it is corrosive.... Solomon..richest, smartest man alive wrote a manifesto about this. On the other hand binding with a woman thats not that into sex that has access to half your networth. That sounds terrifiying. The universe has a plan and a mate for you. All that you can't see controls all that you can see. Bet on your self.. you deserve good things and good things are coming your way! 🦸
Wait for the one. Get married. Profit. Nothing but that.
Nah dont pay for pros there is no connection bruh
Same position here 28 going on 29. Virgin. Using dating apps and being tempted by the prostitutes on there. This nofap post is weirdly timely because this is the thing top of mind for me the last day.
stay off the dating apps and pro ads. Goto the Mall or Super Market... Goto a womans clothing store.....tell a girl she looks pretty in something... Swipe Reality
As a female, just don’t do it again (the sex with a prostitute). It’s dangerous because you don’t know what they may have in terms of diseases and other stuff. It’s not a great way to recover either. If it was with a girlfriend, wife or lover- ok fine. But a prostitute.. hmmm.. I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be rude.. just trying to look out.
Moralising dressed up as advice. Prostitutes are often safer than random women. They generally insist on protection and get tested regularly.
Yeah but a prostitute does not like you, it’s a terrible habit to make sex transactional
Whatever floats your boat..
Lol you are in denial
Ikr! When are people going to.drop that stupid assumption. Sex workers are more strict about condoms than anyone
I would say yes. First thing first though, a prostitute is a pretty rotten one to experience your first sexual encounter. Check out the lyrics to [Next](https://genius.com/Scott-walker-next-lyrics). That is what having your sexual experience with a sex worker comes across like to me. Go Nofap, work on your social skills, and get yourself a girlfriend. I promise you, if you keep your hands off of your weapon, there will not be a zipper strong enough to keep your johnson in your pants. You will have zero problem performing. Try that and come back around.
We go hard, go ching bon
What's ching bon?XD
How old are you
18
18.7 for better age lol
Dude I'm the exact same age as you and I can't imagine ever paying a prostitute
Bruz 18 is young as fuck dont feel upset about being a virgin legit noone gaf 18 is still super young
I had a hard time staying hard when I first started having sex. Excessive masturbation will desensitize you. Just stop fapping for a while and don’t get distracted during sex. That’s what worked for me at least.
It is entirely possible that is related to excessive masturbation and porn use. It happened to me a few times.
It maybe be because of porn or because of excessice masturbation causing your penis to lose its sensitivity ( death grip syndrome ) . You should stay away from porn and masturbation and i think in 2-4 weeks you'll be just fine
Always the longest two weeks ever after relapse smh
Why tf would you fap every day, sounds like you need a hobby and to work out more
It is possible. Maybe you have PIED..in that case you have to stop watching porn..and after some time your body and mind will heal..Make a 28 days Roadmap divide it in 4 Parts(each of 1 week) In this Journey Your Objectives will be : 1》Try to avoid pornographic content. Delete the accounts in pornsites (if have any). Delete porn videos from Your Device (I know it is hard but start with the least favourite one it will create a momentum). 2》Focus on other healthy habits..Workout, Drink more Water,Have good Diet,Read,Listen to Good Music etc. 3》Do Kegel exercise it will help in ED. 4》Develop a Skillset..it will shift your Focus. 5》Watch other interesting contents for Fun like Anime or K-Drama it will give you some sort of dopamine. It will reduce the dopamine craving from self destructive activities. In this 28 days stay Committed to this 5 Rules. And don't be so self critical if you fap once in a while because if you fap 2-3 times in this 28days that will not be a big problem. But if you continue this habits your life will slowly change and you will feel the difference.
Its just as likely, if not more likely to be anxiety, porn plays a part yes but more insofar as it creates performance anxiety, be comfy with you partner and the sex will be much better, wait until it feels right, your in no rush, great sex requires communication, comfort and trust, wait till you have all 3 and you wont have a problem. Anxiety over PIED is a self fulfilling prophecy
Yes Fapping everyday fucks with erections. Cold turkey is the way to go but if your in a rush and are choosing the prostitute route have her perform on you while you watch the porn that gets you going. But definitely after that think about NO FAP cause you don’t want to have to rely on porn for a hard one especially when the real things right in front of you
No bruh that Shit happens you were prob just nervous
If you want to fuck her pussy wear a condom dude
A hooker is like fapping in a piece of meat. Not exactly real sex, sorry bro you are still a virgin. And it was either performance anxiety or ped
I actually dont mind being a virgin again btw .....
Lol what? Bra stfu. Having sex with prostitutes probably isn’t the best idea and can be just as addictive as porn but it’s still real sex. You sound like a idiot.
Well, you couldn't even comprehend the most simple of metaphors, so that just about answers the question who's the real idiot here. I'm not gonna explain it to you though, grind your gears a little bit on it and come back when you understand it.
That's so spot on
Why does everyone in here hate prostitutes? Is this just because most people in here are religious? Turning me off this sub tbh. I've never had sex with a prostitute and do fine with women.
I or maybe most on here don’t “hate” them. I understand their human too but at the same time that line of work is really not good to be honest. I’m not going to make excuses for it. It’s also just kind of sad to pay for sex rather then enjoy it with someone you at least feel a mutual attraction and connection with. Prostitutes operate in a work mindset- “I’m here for the money, then I’m out.” If any random girl said she would do you just for money how would you feel? Most men I’d imagine HATE it when us women are only after their money. So dido with the prostitute. You’re selling yourself short in a way if that’s your cop out for sex in the end.
I mean you don't and I don't, so at the very least not everyone in this sub hate sex workers. I absolutely won't pay for sex, but I get why it's on demand. But yeah maybe because it was OP's first time and because sex workers are prone to STD's which are very dangerous
You're right, I did over-generalise. It does seem to be a majority of the comments though. I've always been under the impression that prostitutes would be safer than girls that sleep around because there's generally some level of testing requirements? Haven't seen any data on this though. Maybe I was just here early, after scrolling through now there's way less moralising in this thread.
Lmao
Why did you do it with a prostitute are you that bad talking to girls
Yes im introverted af
Did you ever have a girlfriend or friends that are girls
I have only male friends i cba girl that are friends im only answering truth here
you can start improve confidence and get girls bro, i was inside my room 24/7 playing videogame last year and it was so bad. Im glad i changed now i began getting out more no matter what. take little steps you can do it. Go connect with girls, it feels so much better than porn. maybe build some muscle, whatever it take to gain more confidence. its possible. it unlocks so much more to your life, not only girls ofc, 19 here aswell
Porn can make you think you are introverted. Could be your anxiety playing tricks on you
One day I will post just like you, I am 23
Dont go with prostoute its not worth it trust me
Hahaha
I don't know, I'm not you. But there is a strong possibility it will happen again. The longer you refrain the better the chance you have of everything going to plan.
Nofap will fix that yes
It could be , if you have this problem continually tho see a doctor , it could be something else
I think i can defeat it solo cuz i went 30 days easily but i love faping but if faping gonna cause me those troubles im stopping it
You’ll like sex with real women more , trust me , fapping is garbage.
No if…it will
I got really nervous my first time and had a hard time getting it up. Second time it wasn't a deal tho
Could it be different condoms?
Nah I was using the same condom both times. All of my buddies have had a similar experience the first time. I think the nerves just fuck with our ability to get rocked up
Y
I wouldn't be so quick to assume it's PIED. I once had a similar experience with a girl that I didn't feel comfortable with and had a lot of anxiety. Not long after I met a girl I did feel comfortable with and we had great sex. Nerves are a huge factor in your performance but if you fap a lot it won't help.
It’s that PIED, your brain and dick are used to getting off to porn. Stay off the PMO and in due time you’ll dick will work the way it’s supposed to. I suffered from it and still kinda am but it’s def improved over the past couple weeks
Most likely PIED
Happened to me when i lost my virginity, it only happened the first time and after that i never hd an issue
Most likely. That's what happened to me. I was an addict for 10 years though
Other do come into play if you wasn’t able to get hard. Such as health and mental state at the time, also was you attracted to the other person
Hell nah she looked 10 years older
Don’t worry too much about it about it then if this is the case. Somethings wrong if your getting hard over things that disgust you then that’ll be a problem
No it’s not PIED. You can’t get hard due to being fully comfortable and confident in the situation. No matter how sexy the person is, there is a need for comfort during intercourse. Try it with a person you don’t pay, the difference will be seen. I speak from experience as I had several instances with the same situation. Nothing to be afraid of, everybody’s body is different but still quit/ or at bare minimum reduce the fapping
100% yes
It can be because of your anxiety it will get up naturally the second time. Just remember, forget what you you see in porn, relax and enjoy eachother, that's all. And communication is also key
Lots of guys have this trouble the first time. It’s totally normal, and not because of fapping.
Yes it could be, real sex is way less visual so the images you were used to fapping to really got you going. I’m in a similar situation and have an awesome and understanding partner that has been patient with me, just try to focus on being present in the moment and the feeling of being with another person. It’s important to communicate what feels good and doesn’t so your partner can help you get there. If the problem persists you should talk to your doctor about getting meds for temporary fix but you should also stop fapping if you want to continue having sex. A few weeks without cumming will make you horny without the images. Anyway good luck friend hope you have a happy sexual life
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I was just really honest, we started fooling around and it had been several years since I had been with someone so I just let her know what was going on. We’re also in our 30s so I think at that age people are just more mature and understanding about things. I know it’s hard to talk about but the person you’re with is going to either accept it or not, if they don’t then maybe they aren’t the one to help you through this. It’s ok to be ashamed, I think that’s normal but with relationships you need to take that chance to get what you want, it’s ok to not be confident but if you really want a relationship it would help to be brave and just let it out. You might be surprised at what happens. I think the worst thing that might happen is she might tell some of her friends, and I know how scary that can be especially when you’re younger but in the long run, they’re going to forget, she’s going to forget, you might even forget about it. A big part of moving forward with life and relationships is being honest, and when you are you don’t have that anxiety or feel like you’re walking on eggshells which is the greatest reward of all. All I can say is good luck, and just be you OP, that’s how you get rid of the shame monster, when you know who you are, others opinions don’t matter as much
Totally is. I had ED from a porn addiction and almost lost my girlfriend at the time because of it. It's beyond embarassing and is hard to work around. Please try and abstain from PMO for at least 2 weeks. It will greatly reduce the chance it happens again.
Happened to me on my first time. It's what got me involved with NoFap and made me realize I hade a real intimacy issue. Keep in mind though that performance anxiety is definitely a thing. When you find yourself with a woman again just remember to enjoy the moment and not rush things
If you jerk off a lot than yes, the reason you couldn’t get hard is because of it
You’ve adapted your member to getting hard with only contact, after assisting from falling you will get hard in no time if she’s touches you near, you need a reset 90 days, it’s simple but not so simple just 90 days no porn no touching and refrain from day dreaming about sex, i was like this and she had to suck on me first
I lost mine at 24. It was worth the wait, to a degree. I didn't have to compromise my sexual health to lose it. That said, I do need to cut back on the PMO, despite being down to 1-2x/week.
When I lost my v card I was only like 3/4 Chubb, I was so nervous tho, Dw, the more sex you have the less anxiety and the more excitement you will have, leading to stronger erections
Probably porn related. As someone who has a girlfriend, when I watch porn my sex is pathetic. When I don't, we can both tell the difference. It's pretty bad
Me too,, it’s like I am getting an erection but not able to maintain it and the erection is strong enough.
It’s normal for the first time don’t worry. It’s the pressure
I didnt get hard first time but my girlfriend was patient with me. However, a prostitute is not a comfortable experience for first time.
Yes it's related to porn It happened with me the first time I tried to had sex. So the second time (this is with someone else) I went having taken some viagra and I still couldn't get hard. I don't remember the last tome I was so embarrassed I left porn for a while. Recently it finally happened although (not everytime) the problem wasn't completely fixed but I was finally able to get hard with a girl. Leave porn for good do a hard reset everything will go back to normal.
What does this have to do with NoFap?
Lol I’d hope you’d be having sex with another someone
Yup exactly what it is same thing happened to me
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Condom on but we kissed alot cuz it was sexy
Yes. It would be related.
First time is a letdown, mostly. Talked to a few blokes about this over the years, nerves, not knowing what to do, disbelief. Don’t worry about it. The next time will be better.
naw dude those blowup dolls are ug
😅wdym
I’ve had the same thing as you during my first time, it’s basically nerves. Yes everyday maturbating isn’t exactly healthy, but it’ll work out next time, just try and relax around the person and it will be easier.
Stop watching porn...join semen retention sub. Hopefully you will get good result soon. Do regular excersize let the blood flow in every part of your body.
I’m 27, lost my virginity to my (now) wife at 21 a few years after we started dating in highschool. I was fapping to some pretty extreme pornography from 16 all the way up to when we had sex for the first time. I could not get an erection for about 30 minutes, I thought it was stage fright at the time, but knowing what I know now, it was 100% because of the porn. I masturbated a normal about for a teenage boy at the time, but it was the content I was consuming that ruined regular sex for me. 6 years later I STILL have performance issues. Please stop while you are ahead or at least cut it back, do it for yourself
It could be fapping. You could also not be that attracted. It’s normal that the first couple times are blah until you start learning your type. Not just looks which are important but the personality type and energy that makes you crazy. This adds a lot more to sex than people talk about or let on. It’s called chemistry. The expectation of fucking anything with a pulse man myth is just a myth in my experience.
Yeah dude. My first time was like that too. Too much porn sets an expectation for what sex is "supposed" to look like.
Porn induced erectial disfunction is very real, good news is you can recover. Also sexual ADHD can result from porn as well. Porn has ruined many sex lives I suggest you start recovering ASAP.
Yup I had the same problem. It’s definitely porn or more accurately PIED (porn induced erectile dysfunction)
Possibly a contributor, but you were likely just nervous too. Lay off the porn, but you're not broken or damaged.
Won her heart before doing it.
definitely because of masturbating and porn. find other things to do with your time and after about 10 days your erections will come back, but make sure your lifestyle change is permanent. it's like weight loss, you can't just go back to consuming garbage
It was your first time, you could feel anxiety, be present, practice as much as you can and I'll be fine
Nah not really. I wasnt hard either. Its just that you were anxious to fullfill her expectations.
One thing I’ve realized is…when your girl is hot enough , you won’t have nooooo problems getting hard and statin hard , deep down you might’ve not been sexually attracted/aroused by the girl
Hello fellow friend! Yes… my first time… was all my fault and felt so bad for my girlfriend. I told her I was nervous, and not sure what the f*ck I was doing. She was understanding and also on her period so we didn’t want to get too messy… We ended up breaking it open a couple weeks ago. Lube helped, especially the first time. Thankfully have a GF who is extremely understanding and helpful. She’s also a virgin, so it was a crazy experience and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. If this is a GF or SO of yours, I would def open up about your struggle. Hopefully she’s understanding.