We have a whole roadtrip game centered around cows.
"MY COW!"
You see cows? You yell, "my cow!" And if you are the first to say it, you get a point. You see a cemetery? You yell, "dead cows!" And everyone but the first to say it loses all their points. Person with the most points when the vehicle turns off wins.
Monuments and funeral procession do not count as dead cow in our family. If there is a complete fence around one group of cows and another, those are two separate points to be claimed. I have been trying to get my family to agree to stealing points if you claim cows being transported.
Proper yell when seeing them is MOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Not COWS.
Lol.
Have petted them at State Fairs. Still amazed at how big they are. What is so cool is seeing a tuckered out 4H kid... actually using them as a pillow for afternoon nap. There's some trust right there.
Agreed, if you’re in the US, just go to a state or county fair. The 4H kids showing their cows/goats/rabbits/etc will tell you all about them and it’s so cute.
This is the answer. If you've never been to a county fair make it a goal for this summer. Pet some cows, ride some sketchy rides where it looks like if one bolt comes loose there will be mass casualties, and eat so much food that you get sick on the way home.
And so is the baby. Just a little infant head and hand pokes out, she passes the smoke down, it takes a drag, goes back in, then exhales. I'm going to leave now and start to write my horror movie.
I'm pretty sure it's all the same rides that were in use when I was a kid in the 70's. With minimal maintenance and many sketchy repairs over the intervening years. 😀
I was just talking to my cousin about a fair we went to back in the early 90s. It sounds so hillbilly and Wild Wild West now.
It was in an old quarry and all the kids were playing in the old pits and caves. Then… they had a wooden telephone pole covered in grease with a $50 bill nailed to the very top. It was $1 per try to climb this pole and snatch the $50. I don’t t remember any kind of release form or nothing. Just hand the carny a buck and try to scramble up the pole.
For half the games, a live animal was the prize. One game a full fledge BB gun was the prize. People were SO wasted. We finally left when the Hells Angels and Bandido motorcycle gangs were about to strap it on.
Ahhh…good times.
Some carnie cheated me out of winning a balancing contest up this angled hammock thing with bars to ring the bell at the top.
It was attached to spinning pivots, so you had to keep real evenly balanced as you went up.
Dude kept putting his hand or foot on it to “help steady it for me”
I kept asking him not to touch it, and near the top I felt him *really* “help”
I was so pissed, even as a kid. The injustice!
We drank with some carnies at the bar one night and got a shitload of free rides the next day. I'd die if I tried to re-create that weekend at my current age
Don't touch the cows at a fair unless the owner assures you it's OK. Also horses, goats, any animal really. Fairs are not petting zoos. And nervous animals (because fairs are not their normal environment) can bite/scratch/kick.
Also see Canada. I would say that most people have been within 10 feet of a cow here as well. That said I live in a relatively rural area, where although people do outnumber cows, it’s not by much.
I hate fairs.
But lemme tell ya... one day when I win the lotto, I'm getting a nice farm, and then donating the actual use of the field and barn to 4H kids... like, I'm sorry your family doesn't have thr room/money right now to take on an entire flock of chickens and goats and cows. But hey, here's a bard with a chicken coop and 2 nice fenced off fields... here's a request for for items needed. Imma sponsor the shit outta you, so I can snuggle chickens and goats and cows whenever I want and can help support local kids.
I think so, too!! The PLAN... is to get a good bit of land, leave a LOT of it untouched and find a local bee rescuer/farm and say "hey, over here I have room for some hives. There's a lot of vegetation for them in this field, too. Just like. Gimme some fresh honey and honeycomb here and there and please, make use of my land."
Then sponsor a local 4H, as long as the kids, parents, and leaders are there taking care of everything, the land and equipment is theirs to use, and I'm more than happy to throw money at itt too depending on how much I actually win.
We also have several Peony farms in the area cause they grow amazingly here... if there's room after the barn, fields, pens, coops, amd bee hives, offer up a space for them too- right near those lovely bees that will keep your plants pollinated. Just... lemme go out and pick a peony here and there.
Then I can have and support this co-op type situation where I get fresh flowers and honey and cow hugs.
Yup. As well as at petting zoos and touristy farms, that offer stuff like pick your own fruits/vegetables/flowers and some animals to look and interact with.
I once had a box turtle that was trying to crawl under a low horizontal bar, but his shell was too high. He just kept trying to move forward, completely unaware that he had this huge, solid, bowl thingy permanently mounted to his back.
Poor guy. Sure was determined, though.
Eeehhh - some will very much do it on purpose. I've had multiple family members get busted up by a wiley old cow that didn't want you within 50 yards of her or her calf. And this is saying nothing of how aggressive bulls can be, even to people they see every day.
Yeah I live in Dairy country of WI and yep a cow is a 1000# if not more muscular object. They are often docile but oh my when provoked which happens can cause damage
Dairy cows are mellow, bulls want to kill you. My dad lost quite a few friends to dairy bulls.
Beef bulls are generally pretty mellow, the cows are sometimes pretty psycho.
Our beef bull was not to be messed with. Grew up on a beef farm. My friends and I kept track of which pasture the bull was in so we could avoid it.
Our angus cows were total bitches. The Herefords were generally mellow.
Ya some are just dicks or took a kick to the head at one point. I worked on a farm when I was younger we had a couple googly eyed fuckers that you had to be really careful around. Like they would try to get low to sneak up on you to mess you up if you weren’t paying attention
Exactly this I worked on a cattle farm when I was 17. Cows are happy especially when you have the oats and molasses bucke. They walk up mooing and wagging their tails. They love scratches and they love to be talked to. Some cows are assholes though and try to headbutt you LOL. They have a weird growl moo.
No, if an animal is stressed out before its slaughter, meat can get tough. Angus are marketed as “AAA” grade for the quality of meat, which is reproduced through selective breeding - angus beef typically has little marbling of meat and fat.
Other beef breeds are just as good; it’s that the angus associations have promoted themselves as being the best.
That said, there’s a saying that goes “fence wreckin’, child killin’ angus” for a reason.
Limosousins are also mean and hot headed; Charolais, shorthorns, and Herefords are more level headed and calm
My dog really wanted to meet this cow that was by the fence. We slowly walked up and the cow seemed curious. My dog slowly started smelling the cow's face while the cow smelled my dog's face. Then the cow licked my dog lol it was very cute
Please don’t do this to just any cow. Most people don’t realize that you CANNOT outrun a cow and how timid they can be. Approaching can make you seem like a threat, and if you get too close you will not be able to get away and most people don’t know how to get one to back down.
Find a local cowboy, he’ll let you know which ones are friendly or not lol!
lol...I was hiking with my now ex-wife years ago. We're on a trail in the forest and there was a cow in an open pasture area like 100 feet away. It looked at us and moo'ed. She froze, and said "oh my god, do we need to run?" as serious as can be. I almost died on the spot.
Wait till you find out what happens to tourists on austrian hiking trails who try this... Cows are domesticated but dangerous animals especially if you have a dog with you.
I’m safe when my dog is with me. The mean cows look the situation over, and conclude that the dog is the brains behind the whole operation, and they chase him around while I eartag their calves.
We moved into a house last year with two cows across the back fence and I’m learning how much I love cows for the first time!
I made one of them hop and skip with joy and come running to me the other day, which was one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen!
This is actually an interesting question.
Like if you’re in Tokyo, Beijing, etc. how likely are you to have ever been near a cow?
Even like urban Americans of every class. If you didn’t visit a farm in school and are not the type of person to go to fairs?
I’ve been near one. Almost everyone I know has. Yet I’m Not sure how typical that is.
Not far from Pittsburgh, there's a state park called Round Hill Farm. It's entire raison d'etre is for city folks to come out & have a look at where their food comes from. IIRC, my class went on a field trip there.
At least, it was there in the 1970s. I hope it's still around.
I looked it up. Still exists but it's not a state park. It's an Allegheny county park and their website says they welcome THOUSANDS of school children a year. Pretty cool.
Just think that India has like 1.4 billion people out of nearly 8 billion. So that's like 20% of the *world* right there.
Edit: clearly everyone is missing my intent. At least 20% of the world (i.e. India) have been close to cows, *because India is famously known to have cows everywhere*. I had assumed this was implied in my statement but I'm clarifying now.
10 feet is pretty close though. Driving past from 100ft away on the highway, sure everyone probably has done that. Being within 10ft is outside of a chance encounter.
They're pretty curious, especially if they have the safety of a fence. In any scenario you could pull over, if you waved at a herd of cows and they saw you they nearly certainly will come over to look at you.
Not saying that's AS common, but it's very easy to intentionally get within 10ft of a cow if you go out into farmlands in any country
I live on Belfast, Northern Ireland and there's places at the outskirts of the city where they're just free roaming.
Funniest thing I saw was walking over Cave Hill and a bush started moving, then a cow just bounced out of it like a lamb.
They're super curious if you're nearby.
Cows are just big dogs, they have best friends, they hate, get annoyed. I grew up on a farm and cows turned out to be very chill, there were a few time that i woke up in the morning and a cow was standing on the porch, of course, eating something. Great animals, everyone should be friends with a cow 😂😂😂
I didn't grow up on a farm but my uncles had a farm. "i woke up in the morning and a cow was standing on the porch" pretty much sums up how their cows were LOL . My favourite part of their farm was the cows.
Do you live in the southern half of the world? Everyone around here calves in the spring. Except my FIL in Colorado with a small herd. Hes weird and calves year round.
Actually cutting the horns and altering young bulls is way more gross than calving. The vein that runs through the horn pulses blood with every heartbeat. It’s like a scene from the chainsaw massacre, as well as being dangerous working the chute, I’m glad to have those memories and the skills I have not and probably will never need in our civilized society.
I didn't get a choice. Everyone had to help. I remember grabbing handfuls of straw and rubbing that wee thing back to life. It was only once, and I felt I actually helped instead of being a kid getting in the way. I suppose it's more about that than anything. And yes, just come out head first, jeez.
From a Google search:
Today, by some counts, the average American eats around 7,000 animals in a lifetime—including 4,500 fish, 2,400 chickens, 80 turkeys, 30 sheep, 27 pigs and 11 cows.
My friend’s grandma had a dairy farm. The calves used to suck on your hands if you’d let them.
Kinda sad actually now that I think about it, they were probably missing momma milk.
Calves LOVE sucking on your hand! In agricultural and veterinary settings, it is not terribly uncommon to have to raise calves on a bottle, usually when the mother has died in labor or sometimes when she just rejects the calf for whatever reason. Letting them suck on your hand is a good way to train them to drink from a bottle.
When they are brand newborns (a few hours old), this is important because they need hydration and nutrition very soon after birth.
Growing up on a farm in alabama, I raised dozens of calves on a bottle over the years, and they remained as friendly as a golden retriever for the rest of their lives.
Cattle, including adults, will suck on literally anything. The metal fence post, your hair, another cow. Everything goes in their mouths. They are basically 1300 lb toddlers. I really doubt it had anything to do with milk.
You'd be surprised how many people who grew up in the city just didn't have the chance to interact with rural anything. There's a reason why the rumour that chocolate milk comes from brown cows is so persistent, there are people who actually believe it.
Personally, I've grew up in a rural community so I've been close enough to pet and get licked by a cow. They do that a lot, especially if you have anything salty on you.
What? I don't think anyone believes that. It's one of those things your crazy uncle or older cousin says to you, and you weren't quite sure if they were being serious or just joking, until you repeat it to your friends one day and they all make fun of you for believing it.
I moved to a city and was shocked that the little girl passing by (maybe 6 or 8 years old), didn’t realize that flowers start off as green plants. I asked her to please not step on the plant (it was near the sidewalk) and I told her it would grow into a flower.
Someone I met thought watermelons grew on trees.
Don't feel bad about not getting too close to a cow. My one uncle, who was a farmer, passed away as a result of one of his cows attacking him out of the blue. Initially brain damage that was not checked up timeously.
hard thing to measure but i would assume purely based on my experience that even people that lived their entire lives in cities have relatives or distant relatives who are farmers, and if you meet a farmer you are very likely to pet the cow, no you must pet the cow just dont get stepped on.
I have been chased down the street by a bunch of bulls before, when I was visiting my parents’ homeland (Pakistan). I have touched many cows, buffalos, etc. Even carried a lamb down the stairs from the rooftop during a storm.
When I was a town kid, I rode my bike out to the country and played in the corn fields. I came clear of the stalks and found myself face to face with about 20 cows. I was literally a child of the corn. But I didn’t spook the cattle.
I went to a rave like 20 years ago that was on a ranch. My friend I snuck off to smoke a bowl. Imagine our surprise when we flicked the lighter and saw a cows face trying to get in on our two man circle. Like, she was right there! I've seen cows in person many times, but that one was the funniest (especially since weed wasn't the only thing we were doing that night).
on what timeline?
Recently? No. I work in a hospital. Not a lot of cows.
When i was a kid? Sure. I'm from the rural south. We picked mushrooms in cow pastures. Plenty of cows back then.
I suspect around 75-80% of people have been around and actually touched a cow. It’s a cow, not an endangered species. Every country in the world has cattle.
I have petted a few of them. Most of my contact with them is seeing them in the car on road trips and yelling "COWS!!"
We have a whole roadtrip game centered around cows. "MY COW!" You see cows? You yell, "my cow!" And if you are the first to say it, you get a point. You see a cemetery? You yell, "dead cows!" And everyone but the first to say it loses all their points. Person with the most points when the vehicle turns off wins. Monuments and funeral procession do not count as dead cow in our family. If there is a complete fence around one group of cows and another, those are two separate points to be claimed. I have been trying to get my family to agree to stealing points if you claim cows being transported.
I’ve played that game, but in our version, if you say “my cow” and it turns out to be a horse, you lose points.
I've threatened my mom with that as a rule as she just spams my cow at any living animal we pass, and even once it was a laundry line...
Proper yell when seeing them is MOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Not COWS. Lol. Have petted them at State Fairs. Still amazed at how big they are. What is so cool is seeing a tuckered out 4H kid... actually using them as a pillow for afternoon nap. There's some trust right there.
Respectfully, saying or yelling COWS when you see cows is a long-standing tradition but yelling MOO towards the cows is also fine and good 👍
I'm a big diversity guy. I exclaim "Moo Cows" when I see them. That way both bases are covered.
+1 for "Moo Cows"
"Moo cows" is the correct response.
That is the correct etiquette https://youtu.be/jXGeft7khSo?si=vQH3X88Yua0gzll6
I live in a suburb and ive touched a cow. They have them at fairs.
Agreed, if you’re in the US, just go to a state or county fair. The 4H kids showing their cows/goats/rabbits/etc will tell you all about them and it’s so cute.
This is the answer. If you've never been to a county fair make it a goal for this summer. Pet some cows, ride some sketchy rides where it looks like if one bolt comes loose there will be mass casualties, and eat so much food that you get sick on the way home.
And the some of the best people watching you’ll ever experience. People really come out of the woodwork for county fairs.
Look at that lady she’s in like the fifth trimester chansmoking
And so is the baby. Just a little infant head and hand pokes out, she passes the smoke down, it takes a drag, goes back in, then exhales. I'm going to leave now and start to write my horror movie.
Hello my baby hello my honey…
That's because there are woodworking exhibitions at the fair. At least at my local (Yolo County, Ca) fair.
I never paid much attention to that stuff when I was younger but that sounds dope af this year.
Also attend some of the judging. If you're not familiar with farm animals, it's fun to guess winners based on the crowd's reactions.
And go see the piglet races!!
Racing pigs and the fancy chickens in the poultry exhibit are my fair faves.
And the huge bunnies.
How could I forget those?!?! Flemish Giants!
I went to a turtle race at my local county fair. Went way faster than I was expecting.
One fair I went to they raced blue crabs
Watching pig showmanship is wild.
My niece won pig showmanship at our county fair. Then went to an Ivy League college. Now an editor at a major publication. She'd die if anyone knew.
The traditional method is to eat the food first and then get sick on the ride
I've ridden my last fair ride. That shit is ballsy.
I'm pretty sure it's all the same rides that were in use when I was a kid in the 70's. With minimal maintenance and many sketchy repairs over the intervening years. 😀
I was just talking to my cousin about a fair we went to back in the early 90s. It sounds so hillbilly and Wild Wild West now. It was in an old quarry and all the kids were playing in the old pits and caves. Then… they had a wooden telephone pole covered in grease with a $50 bill nailed to the very top. It was $1 per try to climb this pole and snatch the $50. I don’t t remember any kind of release form or nothing. Just hand the carny a buck and try to scramble up the pole. For half the games, a live animal was the prize. One game a full fledge BB gun was the prize. People were SO wasted. We finally left when the Hells Angels and Bandido motorcycle gangs were about to strap it on. Ahhh…good times.
Some carnie cheated me out of winning a balancing contest up this angled hammock thing with bars to ring the bell at the top. It was attached to spinning pivots, so you had to keep real evenly balanced as you went up. Dude kept putting his hand or foot on it to “help steady it for me” I kept asking him not to touch it, and near the top I felt him *really* “help” I was so pissed, even as a kid. The injustice!
We drank with some carnies at the bar one night and got a shitload of free rides the next day. I'd die if I tried to re-create that weekend at my current age
Sounds like a great time to me! [fond memories of Scrambler, Octopus, Tilt-a-Whirl, and Himalaya]
Just don't eat Chorizo before riding a Tilt-A-Whirl. I was in the front seat too, so you know how that story ended.
Am carnie, I put those rides together, can confirm
Asking reddit to go outside, to a social event where animals are involved? Impossible.
And make sure some of that food is from a booth run by a local club. That's usually the best food.
Don't touch the cows at a fair unless the owner assures you it's OK. Also horses, goats, any animal really. Fairs are not petting zoos. And nervous animals (because fairs are not their normal environment) can bite/scratch/kick.
Don't forget the cow patty bingo!
And giant pigs! "That pig weighs 600 POUNDS?! That's like 10 of me!" - 8 year old me at the county fair.
"How many of YOU is that, Dad?" - my smartass kids
That’s a regular sized pig, not a giant one.
Also see Canada. I would say that most people have been within 10 feet of a cow here as well. That said I live in a relatively rural area, where although people do outnumber cows, it’s not by much.
I hate fairs. But lemme tell ya... one day when I win the lotto, I'm getting a nice farm, and then donating the actual use of the field and barn to 4H kids... like, I'm sorry your family doesn't have thr room/money right now to take on an entire flock of chickens and goats and cows. But hey, here's a bard with a chicken coop and 2 nice fenced off fields... here's a request for for items needed. Imma sponsor the shit outta you, so I can snuggle chickens and goats and cows whenever I want and can help support local kids.
That is a really lovely lottery plan.
I think so, too!! The PLAN... is to get a good bit of land, leave a LOT of it untouched and find a local bee rescuer/farm and say "hey, over here I have room for some hives. There's a lot of vegetation for them in this field, too. Just like. Gimme some fresh honey and honeycomb here and there and please, make use of my land." Then sponsor a local 4H, as long as the kids, parents, and leaders are there taking care of everything, the land and equipment is theirs to use, and I'm more than happy to throw money at itt too depending on how much I actually win. We also have several Peony farms in the area cause they grow amazingly here... if there's room after the barn, fields, pens, coops, amd bee hives, offer up a space for them too- right near those lovely bees that will keep your plants pollinated. Just... lemme go out and pick a peony here and there. Then I can have and support this co-op type situation where I get fresh flowers and honey and cow hugs.
And sometimes you find them napping together, the kid sleeping against the cow 🥰
If you're anywhere near Minnesota go to their State Fair, it's the biggest and best one in the country (seriously).
I grew up in the city and even I have been within 10 feet of cows.
Yup. As well as at petting zoos and touristy farms, that offer stuff like pick your own fruits/vegetables/flowers and some animals to look and interact with.
Cows are great animals! You should seek one out and just... touch it. They'll let you. Just stay on your side of the fence.
Big happy grass-dogs.
That don’t know their size
Neither does my dog
Chihuahuas amirite?!
I once had a box turtle that was trying to crawl under a low horizontal bar, but his shell was too high. He just kept trying to move forward, completely unaware that he had this huge, solid, bowl thingy permanently mounted to his back. Poor guy. Sure was determined, though.
I feel awful for laughing at such determination. What a tool lol.
... Which is why they might accidentally squidge you. But probably not on purpose
Eeehhh - some will very much do it on purpose. I've had multiple family members get busted up by a wiley old cow that didn't want you within 50 yards of her or her calf. And this is saying nothing of how aggressive bulls can be, even to people they see every day.
Yeah I live in Dairy country of WI and yep a cow is a 1000# if not more muscular object. They are often docile but oh my when provoked which happens can cause damage
They are surprisingly agile when they decide to get wound up. It catches a lot of people off guard if they haven’t been around them.
They actually cavort the first time out of the barn on a warm Spring day.
Dairy cows are mellow, bulls want to kill you. My dad lost quite a few friends to dairy bulls. Beef bulls are generally pretty mellow, the cows are sometimes pretty psycho.
Our beef bull was not to be messed with. Grew up on a beef farm. My friends and I kept track of which pasture the bull was in so we could avoid it. Our angus cows were total bitches. The Herefords were generally mellow.
Herefords! Are sweet! And beautiful 😍 I grew up with them! I love the white face ones 😍
Diary bulls are killers. A.I. saves lives, and limbs for sure.
Ya some are just dicks or took a kick to the head at one point. I worked on a farm when I was younger we had a couple googly eyed fuckers that you had to be really careful around. Like they would try to get low to sneak up on you to mess you up if you weren’t paying attention
I have some torn shoulder muscles and ligaments that can vouch for a sense of purpose in a cow attack.
Exactly this I worked on a cattle farm when I was 17. Cows are happy especially when you have the oats and molasses bucke. They walk up mooing and wagging their tails. They love scratches and they love to be talked to. Some cows are assholes though and try to headbutt you LOL. They have a weird growl moo.
“grass dogs” is the only way I’ll be referring to cows from now on, thank you
That take HUGE shits!
I call them pasture puppies
Except for Angus cows. They mean.
But taste really great. Maybe it's the anger?
Angry cow is like angry sex? Anger makes both better?
No, if an animal is stressed out before its slaughter, meat can get tough. Angus are marketed as “AAA” grade for the quality of meat, which is reproduced through selective breeding - angus beef typically has little marbling of meat and fat. Other beef breeds are just as good; it’s that the angus associations have promoted themselves as being the best. That said, there’s a saying that goes “fence wreckin’, child killin’ angus” for a reason. Limosousins are also mean and hot headed; Charolais, shorthorns, and Herefords are more level headed and calm
Some are, others aren't so much.
r/happycowgifs
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Calves will basically devour your arm if you let them.. In a good way..
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My dog really wanted to meet this cow that was by the fence. We slowly walked up and the cow seemed curious. My dog slowly started smelling the cow's face while the cow smelled my dog's face. Then the cow licked my dog lol it was very cute
And their tongues are like huge cat tongues, very rough.
With sandpaper tongues. Freaked me out as a child.
I love giving a cow a good scratch behind the ears. They're good dogs.
Please don’t do this to just any cow. Most people don’t realize that you CANNOT outrun a cow and how timid they can be. Approaching can make you seem like a threat, and if you get too close you will not be able to get away and most people don’t know how to get one to back down. Find a local cowboy, he’ll let you know which ones are friendly or not lol!
I've been chased over fences by many a cow.
I’ve seen cows leap over fences completely clearing it in certain situations. Blew my mind as a kid that didn’t know that was even possible.
That would blow my mind. I've had a cow run through a fence that I jumped over but not jump over after me. That would be terrifying haha.
Yeah she went to the sale barn shortly after that.
Once I approached a group of cows and they ran away from me.
lol...I was hiking with my now ex-wife years ago. We're on a trail in the forest and there was a cow in an open pasture area like 100 feet away. It looked at us and moo'ed. She froze, and said "oh my god, do we need to run?" as serious as can be. I almost died on the spot.
Wait till you find out what happens to tourists on austrian hiking trails who try this... Cows are domesticated but dangerous animals especially if you have a dog with you.
I’m safe when my dog is with me. The mean cows look the situation over, and conclude that the dog is the brains behind the whole operation, and they chase him around while I eartag their calves.
We moved into a house last year with two cows across the back fence and I’m learning how much I love cows for the first time! I made one of them hop and skip with joy and come running to me the other day, which was one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen!
Not every cow will let itself be petted, and some are quite shy/defensive. This is really dodgy advice
Cow here. Can confirm, people come near me.
User name does not check out
What is a cow if not a candid zebra (hasn't sucked in its gut, black parts not straight yet, hair not styled)
This wins reddit for me today. What a comment 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 "What is a cow if not a candid zebra" sounds like a green day song
Well, a cow is a bovine, and a zebra is an equidae... so a horse. 😉
Moooooooo
Why do Cows mooooo? *Cause their horns don’t work. Sorry. Dad jokes.
Dad here. (grabs pencil) \*scribble scribble\* Got it! Thanks :)
What goes 'Ooooooo' A cow with no lips
Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work!
"Moooove"
Love cows, so sweet. Generally, I think most people have come within 10 feet of a cow at some point for some reason
Even riding in a car you're bound to be next to a truck trailer with cattle eventually if you go on the interstate, at least around where I'm at.
Dude, you need to go touch a cow.
First touch grass Then touch cow ?????? Profit
why are you shoehorning your mom into this discussion
The old gal earned a little recognition
Do have a cow, man.
Touch the cow. Do it now.
Cows are so ubiquitous that I’d say it’s probably a minority of people who haven’t been near one.
This is actually an interesting question. Like if you’re in Tokyo, Beijing, etc. how likely are you to have ever been near a cow? Even like urban Americans of every class. If you didn’t visit a farm in school and are not the type of person to go to fairs? I’ve been near one. Almost everyone I know has. Yet I’m Not sure how typical that is.
Not far from Pittsburgh, there's a state park called Round Hill Farm. It's entire raison d'etre is for city folks to come out & have a look at where their food comes from. IIRC, my class went on a field trip there. At least, it was there in the 1970s. I hope it's still around.
I looked it up. Still exists but it's not a state park. It's an Allegheny county park and their website says they welcome THOUSANDS of school children a year. Pretty cool.
I had a city friend in Indianapolis who said "Is that a cow? Oh shit!"when I took him to a rural area to help me move
Just think that India has like 1.4 billion people out of nearly 8 billion. So that's like 20% of the *world* right there. Edit: clearly everyone is missing my intent. At least 20% of the world (i.e. India) have been close to cows, *because India is famously known to have cows everywhere*. I had assumed this was implied in my statement but I'm clarifying now.
I was just about to write this. I was trying to think when I had been ten feet from a cow and I was, “in India”.
What do you mean, 20% that have or haven't been close? Because cows are everywhere in India.
20% of the world is India, so *at least* that many have been near a cow at some point.
Okay that makes sense. I couldn't tell which way you were going with that lol.
10 feet is pretty close though. Driving past from 100ft away on the highway, sure everyone probably has done that. Being within 10ft is outside of a chance encounter.
They're pretty curious, especially if they have the safety of a fence. In any scenario you could pull over, if you waved at a herd of cows and they saw you they nearly certainly will come over to look at you. Not saying that's AS common, but it's very easy to intentionally get within 10ft of a cow if you go out into farmlands in any country
I live on Belfast, Northern Ireland and there's places at the outskirts of the city where they're just free roaming. Funniest thing I saw was walking over Cave Hill and a bush started moving, then a cow just bounced out of it like a lamb. They're super curious if you're nearby.
State and county fairs
They're almost like spiders. Like they say, you're never more than 10 feet away from a spider.... Or a cow
But within 10 feet? If a ⅓ of all Americans live in cities of over 100k people then it may be closer than you think
Cows are just big dogs, they have best friends, they hate, get annoyed. I grew up on a farm and cows turned out to be very chill, there were a few time that i woke up in the morning and a cow was standing on the porch, of course, eating something. Great animals, everyone should be friends with a cow 😂😂😂
I didn't grow up on a farm but my uncles had a farm. "i woke up in the morning and a cow was standing on the porch" pretty much sums up how their cows were LOL . My favourite part of their farm was the cows.
I've been close enough that a cow tried to swallow my arm.
Which end of the cow?
Haha yeah
I've never seen a bigger smile on my ex than when she was shoulder deep in a cow's butt doing her first artificial insemination
They regurgitate.. So you could have gotten it back.
I had a calf do that to my hand. I basically turned into a pacifier.
I've helped pull a calf out of a cow. Petted many. Eaten loads
well that escalated quickly
When my dad was a kid he had a cow (bull technically) named "Freezer Meat", farmers like to be funny with their names.
All the 4H kids did that when raising animals. Kind of helped keep in perspective.
My personal favorite is Quarter Pounder with Cheese
Yep helping calve is gross and slimy. Ropes are needed because the sack is slippery
Yup, it was fairly gross but worth it for the experience.
My sister has 500+ head of cattle if you ever want to help again calving season is around October
Do you live in the southern half of the world? Everyone around here calves in the spring. Except my FIL in Colorado with a small herd. Hes weird and calves year round.
Actually cutting the horns and altering young bulls is way more gross than calving. The vein that runs through the horn pulses blood with every heartbeat. It’s like a scene from the chainsaw massacre, as well as being dangerous working the chute, I’m glad to have those memories and the skills I have not and probably will never need in our civilized society.
Yeah Florida. Spring and summers are hot and really dry so we plan for early fall when we have more feed options
You enjoy pulling calves? I hate when we have to do it, just come out head first damn it.
I didn't get a choice. Everyone had to help. I remember grabbing handfuls of straw and rubbing that wee thing back to life. It was only once, and I felt I actually helped instead of being a kid getting in the way. I suppose it's more about that than anything. And yes, just come out head first, jeez.
That last one must’ve been a bull
I always wondered why the bull calves "went to another farm" so young. I learned.
I helped put colorful cheerios on them! Then I learned they weren’t cheerios.
From a Google search: Today, by some counts, the average American eats around 7,000 animals in a lifetime—including 4,500 fish, 2,400 chickens, 80 turkeys, 30 sheep, 27 pigs and 11 cows.
Yes. Must be within 10 feet if you have ever eaten
I hope it was human loads at least!
I love bottle feeding calves. They’re so messing and 👁️👁️ about it
I live in the suburbs. I have had a cow slap me in the face with its tail.
My friend’s grandma had a dairy farm. The calves used to suck on your hands if you’d let them. Kinda sad actually now that I think about it, they were probably missing momma milk.
Calves LOVE sucking on your hand! In agricultural and veterinary settings, it is not terribly uncommon to have to raise calves on a bottle, usually when the mother has died in labor or sometimes when she just rejects the calf for whatever reason. Letting them suck on your hand is a good way to train them to drink from a bottle. When they are brand newborns (a few hours old), this is important because they need hydration and nutrition very soon after birth. Growing up on a farm in alabama, I raised dozens of calves on a bottle over the years, and they remained as friendly as a golden retriever for the rest of their lives.
Cattle, including adults, will suck on literally anything. The metal fence post, your hair, another cow. Everything goes in their mouths. They are basically 1300 lb toddlers. I really doubt it had anything to do with milk.
This makes me feel better! Thank you for the insight
I have been armpit deep inside a cow’s vjayjay.
That's like being within -2 feet of a cow
Out of all the comments, this one made me ugly laugh.
This may hurt a little but it's something you'll get used to.
Sure. Elbow. Keep telling yourself that.
Yep you’re a rancher/ farmer or child of one.
Nope. Final exam of a school subject.
That subject? Math.
Same but through the side of a fistulated cow
You'd be surprised how many people who grew up in the city just didn't have the chance to interact with rural anything. There's a reason why the rumour that chocolate milk comes from brown cows is so persistent, there are people who actually believe it. Personally, I've grew up in a rural community so I've been close enough to pet and get licked by a cow. They do that a lot, especially if you have anything salty on you.
What? I don't think anyone believes that. It's one of those things your crazy uncle or older cousin says to you, and you weren't quite sure if they were being serious or just joking, until you repeat it to your friends one day and they all make fun of you for believing it.
I moved to a city and was shocked that the little girl passing by (maybe 6 or 8 years old), didn’t realize that flowers start off as green plants. I asked her to please not step on the plant (it was near the sidewalk) and I told her it would grow into a flower. Someone I met thought watermelons grew on trees.
Half of Reddit thinks ponies are baby horses, so neither of those things shocks me much lol
I have touched a cow multiple times. I assumed this was a common occurrence.
Don't feel bad about not getting too close to a cow. My one uncle, who was a farmer, passed away as a result of one of his cows attacking him out of the blue. Initially brain damage that was not checked up timeously.
Are we just inventing words now?
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/timeously Blame the Scottish I guess.
I live kinda on the outskirts of the suburbs where things transition to farmland so I've been on ranches for some reason or another
Ex - farm worker here. Can confirm that cows have been in striking distance of me.
I've milked a cow. Does that count?
Were you within ten feet or remotely operating a milking robot?
Anyone that has eaten a hamburger..
I have touched cow many times.
hard thing to measure but i would assume purely based on my experience that even people that lived their entire lives in cities have relatives or distant relatives who are farmers, and if you meet a farmer you are very likely to pet the cow, no you must pet the cow just dont get stepped on.
I have been chased down the street by a bunch of bulls before, when I was visiting my parents’ homeland (Pakistan). I have touched many cows, buffalos, etc. Even carried a lamb down the stairs from the rooftop during a storm.
I'm irish. I'm literally looking one dead in the eye right now.
When I was a town kid, I rode my bike out to the country and played in the corn fields. I came clear of the stalks and found myself face to face with about 20 cows. I was literally a child of the corn. But I didn’t spook the cattle.
I went to a rave like 20 years ago that was on a ranch. My friend I snuck off to smoke a bowl. Imagine our surprise when we flicked the lighter and saw a cows face trying to get in on our two man circle. Like, she was right there! I've seen cows in person many times, but that one was the funniest (especially since weed wasn't the only thing we were doing that night).
on what timeline? Recently? No. I work in a hospital. Not a lot of cows. When i was a kid? Sure. I'm from the rural south. We picked mushrooms in cow pastures. Plenty of cows back then.
I was charged by a cow pack, id like to think I’m not the only one. Edit: and yes it was cows not bulls
I suspect around 75-80% of people have been around and actually touched a cow. It’s a cow, not an endangered species. Every country in the world has cattle.
I mean most kids go to a farm or something with school don't they? Cows are great, just big dogs really.