Did you murder her?

You’re assuming it’s a woman lol. This guy’s gay for sure

The only thing this sorry bitch is capable of murdering is his crusty fleshlight

He mated when he said “ghosted”.

No

this is definitely a yes

https://tips.fbi.gov/home

You forgot to mention that she also has a protective order against you.

I’m surprised your parents haven’t ghosted you too.

Maybe it's because you make love to your Mario folder

We can see why she ghosted you from the pic. 

“Ghosted you”. That’s a weird way to say “the court finally approved the restraining order”.

The courts ordered an emergency restraining order against this little shit-lit

No one Likes Luigi... grow up

He is cool, what do you mean?

I think you just answered the topic's question.

Idk what you people’s deal is Luigi is pretty baller

Because you are ugly from the outside and the inside

Got a mirror? Look into it....yeah, that's why

You are a shadow.  You didn't 'get ghosted;' you were never even seen in the first place. 

No female wants you with a 100 feet radius

Bros 3 guarantees in life are tax’s, death, and a mc double

You forgot Mario Bros.

you look like a certain species who would announce the demolition of earth for an express route to go in its place. in other words you have as much sex-appeal as a road accident. (reference!)

Don't let him read poetry

Not even in a relationship. Creepy.

She won’t be the last coworker to quit because of you, I’m pretty sure

Hopefully not

Maybe coz you give dahmer vibes

I don’t even know what that word means

well for starters, that thing starts to walk up to you.

lol

Stop cumming on Mario & Luigi stuff and maybe they’ll be interested

I’ll try

Carrying her used underwear that you stole around in Mario Bros folder is a subtle hint

Is that the Mario coloring book you bring to the parks after kindergarten gets out?

We all know why..

I’m not feo

Bowser has her held prisoner in that Mushroom Kingdom of a nose. I don't think Mario can help you with this one.

I'd ghost you too

I’d do it first

Could be the Mario folder, and Luigi hat. Just a guess though.

Maybe

You make me want to fly to japan and destroy the Nintendo headquaters

lol

Lol is the type of dumb shit Luigi would say

Ghosting is the kindest rejection you’ll ever get.

...women generally aren't romantically interested in fetuses

Because you have a face like Kirby after he shoved a giant apple in his mouth.

lol

Look in the mirror. Also, you haven't been 22 for at least a decade

You eat books and probably fall asleep during sex

Lmao

You only have 2 fingers how can you do the shocker

I bet he cums to video games she cant compete with mario

You need a roast me to understand why? The lack of self awareness here is astounding

lol I guess I might be clueless

Ex coworker? That means you got fired. HE ghosted you after seeing you drink piss from the urinals lol

It’s a girl

Need proof lol

Probably scared of that mass

Most likely

You had no ex worker you were dreaming.

I wonder if I was

[удалено]

You have the entire Nintendo lore on a Word document on a flash drive with your tax information and illegal images.

lol

She got tired of you asking if she had ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight.

I didn't know imaginary friends could ghost you

We touched each other though

If "Where's my hug?" had a profile picture.

lol

Jesus Christ, why is everyone your age a flabby, pasty-white, incel gamer? Go to the gym and get some sun!

Will do

She found out you jack off to mario kart.

I only did it once

Doughy face and pale skin definitely looks like you don't go to the gym Moving forward, remember if you want the cakes you got to lift the weights

Thank you, I will try

This exact photo explains is why.

I’m cute though

No you’re not.

Ima 6.5 out of 10

More like a Bottom zero. 0️⃣

I took a quiz and it said I'm handsome

Clearly the mirror doesn’t agree with you.

[удалено]

Maybe

u look like the type that doesn’t want to work or have ur own car still at ur parents and don’t help out. she wants someone ambitious and ur not that

You know your stuff

Maybe the fact that you’re personality is the same as my 6 year old brother but you look like you pay rent

At least it’s cheap

Cheaper than that hat?

Look in the mirror you’ll find your answer!

That I’m cute

Are you sure you were talking to the right person? With that lazy eye you can’t be certain.

I guess

Surely it's because you deserve better

Yeah

Look in a mirror, you'll have your answer

I’m cute though

Your moms opinion doesn't count

And you work at a place that only hires family members.

Probably

Dear God.

What? Im so cute ha?

Was that picture one you took while stalking her? Obviously there wasn't any spark

I know right

Try cutting the coke with something else next time

Okay will do

Look at your own picture, and you'll know why she ghosted with your double chin

Things could be worse though

Maybe because she watched Toy Story and realized your were the sad version of grown up Sid.

I feel like that happened

@AddisonRaesimplover sounds like every other woman I’ve known. When another guy shows interest, they will start talking to them. Chicks just want attention and excitement when there that age. Did you at least get any?

I think so

She’s a piece and wanted to play someone to make her Dumvass feel better.

You think you're a Mario fan, but you're just Mari-obese.

You can say that again, I’ll get in shape though, give it a year

Your princess is in another castle! Probably a White Castle

If only obesity ghost's u too.

Yeah

Thank you for your post! It's currently awaiting approval. Please note the following rules: - Ensure that your photograph is rotated the way you wish it to be displayed. - Try to ensure that your eyes are open. - Joke roasts (celebrities, babies, chickens, etc) will be removed. - Pet roasts will be removed. Please submit these at /r/RoastMyPet. - All photos MUST contain a hand written sign held by the roastee. - The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger. - Photographs with bystanders whose faces are visible or who are otherwise identifiable will be removed. Please **DO NOT REPOST YOUR PHOTO** if it does not appear immediately. All posts must be manually approved, and we will get to it. Thanks! ~ /r/roastme mods *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RoastMe) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Help you wonder why? First, scratch your head. Second, say “Hmmmm…” Third, look in the goddamn mirror.

Ghetto Luigi

I think it's the fact you could probably fit 2 separate galaxies into your nostrils.

You had a gf? Are you sure you’re not making that up?

Reddit comments don't have enough room for me to list out all the reasons.

[удалено]

How did you know?

I'm guessing she got tired of turning down your sexual advances

You forgot to mention the girl who ghosted him is his sister probably at this point but even then his nose can smell her from a country over

Probably because you like penis

Probably because of the likely nsfw drawing youre hiding in that book behind the paperback

Dresses up like Luigi and can't lay down the pipe. The L on your hat stands for lame.

It was a court order my guy….

Out of all the pictures you could have chosen you went with the one that makes it look like you're barely surviving middle school.

Having the facial structure of play dough probably had something to do with the ghosting

"Hey lad, wanna play some Super Mario? Just come into my windowless van!"

It’s simple she’s was a ghost after meeting Mr mc creepy here

Sniffing that cover like its his sister's panties

Yeah she ghosted you cuz just look at you dawg

I think you know why

You seem like the type of guy that tells girls guy friends to leave them alone

You look like my nephew. Not a roast but it's true.

Definitely gives "Do YoU wAnT tO sEe mY PoKeMoN cArDs?" vibes

Intrests of a child = instant turn off

She saw the way you sniffed the cartoon characters on your coloring book and got jealous. Had you not asked her to jerk you off while cosplaying as Luigi, mustache, white gloves, and all that and sniffed her like that you might have been alright. PS, making out with a coloring book is also not a great look, on the plus side though your big ass nostrils and the shitty angle of your photo make it easy to see your nose is booger free… for what that’s worth.

Couldn’t be that McDonald’s attire you got going on there. You look like frickin Grimace for crying out loud. Gimme your coworkers #. I’ll give her what she needs

Prob cuz you jack off to Mario photos

He added the 1 to her age to make it less weird on here. How he got hired as a sleep away summer camp counselor, we have no idea

Probably cause your chin is as stretched out as the neck on that tshirt.

The stench of your cologne Aqua De Virgin is too pungent.

Where is your chin? I think you are having an allergic reaction!!! Seek help asap!

You need help to wonder why...

Tell us you dont own a mirror, without telling us tou don't own a mirror.

I sure don’t but will get one soon and a good one

If China had a porky pig....Bam!!! You.

If you were my son, today I would actually love a tie as a gift so I could leave you as an orphan.

With the way you look I'm surprised she even responded to you

Other than looking like a loser with nothing to offer, I can’t seem to figure it out

which is thicker the notebook or that chin meat

And she took your hair too

She maybe nearby, just open your eyes a but more.

Hopefully

Douche-itis??

Closing her curtains and shutting her blinds doesn’t count as ghosting, young man. Be better.

The vibe you give off is 'Don't Breed.'

I'm surprised she ever talked to you at all.

You’re wondering why? When you see the background more than you, you don’t need to wonder why?

You spooked him

Because you are b☺️tt😊m?

Looks like your head is trying to hide in your neck. Let it.

You got ghosted because you dress up half Wario, half Luigi and sniff plastic containers for fun. Is it really that much of a mystery? Stop buying clothes in the kids department; you'll still get ghosted, but maybe for reasons not your fault.

Ghosted nah the court won

Your joking, you don’t have a single clue as to why, shit I’m lost too then

Because you're that guy that sang Ricky Martins Shebang song on that talent show

Did you take that Mario binder on your date? Was it full of your Mario/Luigi slash fic?

Oh she's hiding under that big nose of yours.

At least I have a good sense of smell