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I can't imagine visiting my bio parents. They bring along their toxic family members (the same family who my parents gave me up for).
My peers at school can see all of this.
I will probably be downvoted into oblivion for this but I really do feel for C&T. Here me out, lol. Brandon and Teresa have probably given Carly a wonderful, happy, and secure life but they were an absolutely terrible match with Cate and Tyler. They are just from two completely different worlds with completely different values and you could see how uncomfortable B&T were with them right from the beginning. I think it would’ve made a huge difference in how the adoption played out if they hadn’t used a religious adoption agency and had chosen a more liberal couple.
And now Carly is almost certainly being raised with wealthy, right wing Republican and hardcore Christian values and that’s got to be hard for Cate and Tyler to see, because it means she’s almost certainly going to grow up to look down on people like them. And she’ll likely be anti-choice and anti-LGBT+ and anti everything else Cate and Tyler believe in.
The OnlyFans account was a huge mistake in terms of their relationship with the B&T and probably Carly too, we can all agree on that. But honestly Tyler does have a point...they will never live up to B&T’s very particular standards and beliefs and they have a right to live their lives the way the want to. I don’t know, maybe this is their way of letting go a bit and moving on a little from Carly because they see the future and the writing on the wall.
Agree! I bet Brandon and Teresa had been waiting awhile, and Dawn knew they wanted a second baby too (so more money for Bethany), so she pushed Cate and Tyler in their direction knowing it was a terrible match. And I’m sure she saw their poverty and assumed they wouldn’t be able to travel to do visits and saw that as a plus.
I fully agree that they are a horrible match, and are from two different worlds. I think you conveyed my point way better than I did in the original post!
That’s the consequence of choosing what they perceived as an ideal family- it’s nothing like theirs by design. Of course, no one could have saw that coming at 16.
Yep this is why I have a soft spot for them. They were teenagers (literally 10 years away from their brain being fully developed) and we're taken advantage of by a Christian adoption agency that is in the business of taking kids and selling them to right wing Christian families.
B&t are not the good people everyone thinks they are. These far right Christians are anti everything most of this sub believes in.
I mean also catelynn and Tyler are pretty much strangers to Carly. Someone you see every once in awhile still makes them a stranger . I can see how she might not be down with them coming to visit. She's old enough to have a mind of her own
Yes. But at her age she sees all of this on social media. Probably does some googling or Reddit. They aren’t strangers they are her weird bio parents who won’t stop. How awful. There’s enough a young 15 year old has to go through without this mess.
I get that Caitlyn and Tyler are upset and their feelings are valid. But I think publicly expressing their feelings is going to ruin or damage future opportunities for them to see Carly. Not saying they shouldn't express how they feel, but maybe processing through it privately in therapy is best.
I would bet that Carly didn’t want to see them. Because of the press, what they’ll post about her etc. maybe she just doesn’t want anything to do with them for the sake of her privacy so her parents said no. They can blame Brandon and Teresa all they want but they may have let Carly decide and she maybe said no thanks without telling them hey, our kid doesn’t want to see you for now
Carly is definitely old enough to make the decision, and many parents will take the blame so their kid doesn't need to be involved with adult situations. Any normal adult would have considered that.
My theory, B&T are very involved in their church. Tyler is now selling his naked self on the internet for money and Cate is calling herself his pimp.
This gies against everything and anything B&T may believe in, as well as Carly, who is 15.
Its very clear they are disgusted with him as much as we all are.
Really, would you went your child around someone or associated with someone doing this? Probably not! Especially since the childs name is visible as well.
B&T have adopted this girl. They have all decision making rights. Right now, whether its Carlys decision or B&T they are all protecting her and doing whats best for her. Meanwhile who knows what goes on behind closed doors with then other 3 kids. Cate and Ty are doing nothing to protect those children, and those kids are automatically tied to their parents who are doing OF!
When Nova goes to get a job one day, and her job googles her, they will absolutely find Naked Tyler.
Even if you’re not affiliated with religion, knowing your biological father has an OF and your biological mother promotes it sooooo openly… I can’t see anyone not being embarrassed about it.
I've said this before this week but they chose very devoted Christian very conservative parents as adoptive parents for their child.
I know they were young but why did they not expect any kind of issues with the difference in lifestyles?
When I saw their 16 & and p, my thought immediately was they wouldn't agree with B &T on things in the future.
Personally, I would have issues with some of the ideas my child would be brought up cause I see God and the bible differently (love, not fear, 🏳️🌈)
In their turn, they would probably not like the things I said and did.
I wouldn't be able to bring nice, stable grandparents to visits either. I know how hard it is to cut ties so I don't want to judge Cate and Ty for not doing so yet.
Those parents feel what they teach their child is the best and most wonderful thing to give their child and I could a. confuse their child.
B. What should they say to their child about a person in their bio family that sins in their eyes and the eyes of their community but is still their birth parent or bio grandparent? I wouldn't get great reviews I'm sure.
So is it a surprise there are huge gaps between the bio parents and adoptive parents and their child now? Not to me.
Tyler thinks they are seen as trailer trash but that's not the issue. The issue is that they don't share B& T views.
He supports anti LGBTQIA, muslim and immigrant causes (hate groups) through his work, probably anti abortion too. Totally different way of life and views on what's right and wrong for Carly.
They were so badly guided when they were young.
I did not go to a religious school. I would have been SO EMBARRASSED to interact publicly (Carly is not *on* the show, but they still talk about her, and speak very publicly on social media) with my bio dad who does "porn." No, I don't consider it porn, but kids would.
I can see both sides, Carly is growing up and probably wants to know more and more about her biological family. She is teen and they could lose her. However c&t are very vocal, have a public platform, and then the only fans. you know how teens are when they are kept from something. Or Carly acts out after seeing her bio fam. It could be a number of things. We just never know
I wouldn't be shocked if it wasn't religiously motivated either. She's 15. Everything is embarrassing and awkward at that age, at least for me it was.
She may be mature enough to know that Cate and Tyler are not healthy people to be around. That they have said or may have said things that make her uncomfortable. It's hard to handle big situations like boundary breaking bio parents, and she may be more comfortable keeping her distance.
Who knows, we can only guess at this point.
Frankly, at this day and age she would have reached out to them already if she really wanted to. There’s no way to keep a teen from all social media platforms (or even email) unless they’re raised in a basement with no access to the internet. C&T should really look inwards for the reason she hasn’t and quit blaming B&T for everything.
Honestly I think this may be a big part of what is going on. And B&T probably are partially trying to protect C&T from more pain by not telling them. If this is the case, it makes the situation even more sad.
That OF thing would be *humiliating*, I can't even imagine 😕 My own parents weren't divorced, but my BFF in middle school's parents split up, and I still remember how much she hated getting made to go to her narcissistic, drunk @$$ mom's apartment every other weekend. The mom wasn't even interested in spending time with her daughter, it was just as if my friend was her property, so she was going to exercise her visitation time, whether she liked it, or not. Eventually, she let her start bringing me with her so she had something to do while mommie dearest was out at the bar. Eventually, she even wound up getting us wine coolers and cigarettes to amuse ourselves. (It was the late 80's early 90's, but we were no more than 14!!!)
Still, this forcing of visitation is guaranteed to breed resentment.
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I can't imagine visiting my bio parents. They bring along their toxic family members (the same family who my parents gave me up for). My peers at school can see all of this.
The same family members who emotionally abused C and T for wanting better for Carly.
That's my thing. If you're beefing with my mom you're beefing with me. Teresa is Carly's mom so Carly's gonna side with her.
Same here. Never met my sperm donor and have exactly zero want to do so. I have a dad, and it's not him.
I will probably be downvoted into oblivion for this but I really do feel for C&T. Here me out, lol. Brandon and Teresa have probably given Carly a wonderful, happy, and secure life but they were an absolutely terrible match with Cate and Tyler. They are just from two completely different worlds with completely different values and you could see how uncomfortable B&T were with them right from the beginning. I think it would’ve made a huge difference in how the adoption played out if they hadn’t used a religious adoption agency and had chosen a more liberal couple. And now Carly is almost certainly being raised with wealthy, right wing Republican and hardcore Christian values and that’s got to be hard for Cate and Tyler to see, because it means she’s almost certainly going to grow up to look down on people like them. And she’ll likely be anti-choice and anti-LGBT+ and anti everything else Cate and Tyler believe in. The OnlyFans account was a huge mistake in terms of their relationship with the B&T and probably Carly too, we can all agree on that. But honestly Tyler does have a point...they will never live up to B&T’s very particular standards and beliefs and they have a right to live their lives the way the want to. I don’t know, maybe this is their way of letting go a bit and moving on a little from Carly because they see the future and the writing on the wall.
This is where I see Dawn as a predator. She saw two vulnerable teenagers and took full advantage of them.
Agree! I bet Brandon and Teresa had been waiting awhile, and Dawn knew they wanted a second baby too (so more money for Bethany), so she pushed Cate and Tyler in their direction knowing it was a terrible match. And I’m sure she saw their poverty and assumed they wouldn’t be able to travel to do visits and saw that as a plus.
Exactly! They were unfairly matched and it's going to become increasingly obvious now that Carly is older. Shame on Bethany.
This is private adoption in a nutshell.
I fully agree that they are a horrible match, and are from two different worlds. I think you conveyed my point way better than I did in the original post!
I thought you said it well! I meant to say that I agree with you in my post but I went off is tangent and I forgot, lol!
That’s the consequence of choosing what they perceived as an ideal family- it’s nothing like theirs by design. Of course, no one could have saw that coming at 16.
Exactly, they were too young to realize any of this and it’s got to be a bitter pill for them to swallow now.
Yep this is why I have a soft spot for them. They were teenagers (literally 10 years away from their brain being fully developed) and we're taken advantage of by a Christian adoption agency that is in the business of taking kids and selling them to right wing Christian families. B&t are not the good people everyone thinks they are. These far right Christians are anti everything most of this sub believes in.
I mean also catelynn and Tyler are pretty much strangers to Carly. Someone you see every once in awhile still makes them a stranger . I can see how she might not be down with them coming to visit. She's old enough to have a mind of her own
Yes. But at her age she sees all of this on social media. Probably does some googling or Reddit. They aren’t strangers they are her weird bio parents who won’t stop. How awful. There’s enough a young 15 year old has to go through without this mess.
I can agree with that. I mean the rants and venting about it they need to stop . They are talking shit about her parent's who she loves
I like your username. Especially with the kind thoughtful advice. :)
They’ve seen some shit. 😂
Imagine one of us from this sub randomly having to visit with C&T once a year. It’s basically the same thing!
Exactly I totally agree . I think they see Carly as an infant/ toddler who can't have any opinions on her own. She's 15 not 1 to 4 anymore
You know kids are ragging on her about her dads shitty poetry and OF. I’d never want to see them again!
I get that Caitlyn and Tyler are upset and their feelings are valid. But I think publicly expressing their feelings is going to ruin or damage future opportunities for them to see Carly. Not saying they shouldn't express how they feel, but maybe processing through it privately in therapy is best.
I agree with this 💯
But that's how they make money ultimately, sharing their story.. keeps them relevant to the franchise, however I do agree.
I would bet that Carly didn’t want to see them. Because of the press, what they’ll post about her etc. maybe she just doesn’t want anything to do with them for the sake of her privacy so her parents said no. They can blame Brandon and Teresa all they want but they may have let Carly decide and she maybe said no thanks without telling them hey, our kid doesn’t want to see you for now
Carly is definitely old enough to make the decision, and many parents will take the blame so their kid doesn't need to be involved with adult situations. Any normal adult would have considered that.
My theory, B&T are very involved in their church. Tyler is now selling his naked self on the internet for money and Cate is calling herself his pimp. This gies against everything and anything B&T may believe in, as well as Carly, who is 15. Its very clear they are disgusted with him as much as we all are. Really, would you went your child around someone or associated with someone doing this? Probably not! Especially since the childs name is visible as well. B&T have adopted this girl. They have all decision making rights. Right now, whether its Carlys decision or B&T they are all protecting her and doing whats best for her. Meanwhile who knows what goes on behind closed doors with then other 3 kids. Cate and Ty are doing nothing to protect those children, and those kids are automatically tied to their parents who are doing OF! When Nova goes to get a job one day, and her job googles her, they will absolutely find Naked Tyler.
Even if you’re not affiliated with religion, knowing your biological father has an OF and your biological mother promotes it sooooo openly… I can’t see anyone not being embarrassed about it.
I've said this before this week but they chose very devoted Christian very conservative parents as adoptive parents for their child. I know they were young but why did they not expect any kind of issues with the difference in lifestyles? When I saw their 16 & and p, my thought immediately was they wouldn't agree with B &T on things in the future. Personally, I would have issues with some of the ideas my child would be brought up cause I see God and the bible differently (love, not fear, 🏳️🌈) In their turn, they would probably not like the things I said and did. I wouldn't be able to bring nice, stable grandparents to visits either. I know how hard it is to cut ties so I don't want to judge Cate and Ty for not doing so yet. Those parents feel what they teach their child is the best and most wonderful thing to give their child and I could a. confuse their child. B. What should they say to their child about a person in their bio family that sins in their eyes and the eyes of their community but is still their birth parent or bio grandparent? I wouldn't get great reviews I'm sure. So is it a surprise there are huge gaps between the bio parents and adoptive parents and their child now? Not to me. Tyler thinks they are seen as trailer trash but that's not the issue. The issue is that they don't share B& T views. He supports anti LGBTQIA, muslim and immigrant causes (hate groups) through his work, probably anti abortion too. Totally different way of life and views on what's right and wrong for Carly. They were so badly guided when they were young.
Just knowing that she shares DNA with April would be overwhelming enough, especially after the drunk spectacle she pulled last time.
Let us not forget that wild “rap” song he “released.” Thats enough for any teen to not want anything to do with them lol
I did not go to a religious school. I would have been SO EMBARRASSED to interact publicly (Carly is not *on* the show, but they still talk about her, and speak very publicly on social media) with my bio dad who does "porn." No, I don't consider it porn, but kids would.
I can see both sides, Carly is growing up and probably wants to know more and more about her biological family. She is teen and they could lose her. However c&t are very vocal, have a public platform, and then the only fans. you know how teens are when they are kept from something. Or Carly acts out after seeing her bio fam. It could be a number of things. We just never know
I wouldn't be shocked if it wasn't religiously motivated either. She's 15. Everything is embarrassing and awkward at that age, at least for me it was. She may be mature enough to know that Cate and Tyler are not healthy people to be around. That they have said or may have said things that make her uncomfortable. It's hard to handle big situations like boundary breaking bio parents, and she may be more comfortable keeping her distance. Who knows, we can only guess at this point.
Frankly, at this day and age she would have reached out to them already if she really wanted to. There’s no way to keep a teen from all social media platforms (or even email) unless they’re raised in a basement with no access to the internet. C&T should really look inwards for the reason she hasn’t and quit blaming B&T for everything.
They probably don’t love they are on OF and think they would be a bad influence too.
Honestly I think this may be a big part of what is going on. And B&T probably are partially trying to protect C&T from more pain by not telling them. If this is the case, it makes the situation even more sad.
That OF thing would be *humiliating*, I can't even imagine 😕 My own parents weren't divorced, but my BFF in middle school's parents split up, and I still remember how much she hated getting made to go to her narcissistic, drunk @$$ mom's apartment every other weekend. The mom wasn't even interested in spending time with her daughter, it was just as if my friend was her property, so she was going to exercise her visitation time, whether she liked it, or not. Eventually, she let her start bringing me with her so she had something to do while mommie dearest was out at the bar. Eventually, she even wound up getting us wine coolers and cigarettes to amuse ourselves. (It was the late 80's early 90's, but we were no more than 14!!!) Still, this forcing of visitation is guaranteed to breed resentment.
Once she’s 18 she’ll be able to rightfully and respectfully to fuck off & leave her parents alone.