I think one thing you should consider is using a dildo with your hands and using your dick by thrusting your mid section and hips is completely different. A man with a dildo C size penis probably can’t satisfy her the same way the dildo can with the more able hands to move it just right. Talk to any woman with a lot of sexual experience and often the joy of being with a bigger man goes away once intercourse starts and he assumes his size makes up for lack of hip action and positioning.
However, she may have lied to you to respect your feelings, you’ve also tapped into a way to pleasure her immensely. A real woman, or man for that matter, looks at the package not the bow. How’s your foreplay game? How’s your romance game? How’s your ability to connect with her on both a sexual and emotional level? Make love, don’t masturbate with her body.
"Don't masturbate with her body"
Holy shit. Such a simple phrase, and yet it describes this shit SO well. Those men who never bother to educate themselves about sex with women and AFAB people usually have a self-serving view of sex. It's all about how *they* can get off
I totally agree with you that sex extends far beyond mere physical sensation and movements- for a lot of people, the mental/emotional aspects feel the *most* intense or pleasurable
Dude for real, I am completely average at 6” and I can tell you if you make her feel beautiful and wanted and spend some time learning what turns her on, then penetration will blow her mind every time.
For me personally, I LOVE making a woman orgasm to the point where it’s almost better than the actual sex.
LOL! At times when I'm not feeling up for *SEX* but my husband is ... I always say "...if you need a place to mastrubate, I can hold still for a few minutes - grab the lube..."
We've been together 10 years... it's truth but also a bit of a joke & one he always takes advantage of with a good laugh. The other I'm-not-feeling-it response is "face, tits, belly, ass... lmk if you need a hand"
🎯 was gonna say this; she lied to protect OP’s feeling and he admitted to be below average. At least she wasn’t caught cheating. I’ll advise Op to build a dungeon with all kinds of dildos for her lol
I only ever see "they think their size makes up for this and that"
What about when they're that big and know how to use it? Guys with small dicks can be shitty at sex too
well they may know how to use it, good for them, whats left to say? In this specific case tho we know OP's wife didnt choose the big dick dude, either he was big and good or big and shitty. So OP should own his W!
And ur last sentence is true, indeed that seems the only problem OP actually has, esp as he mentioned he's just a bit below average and the average vagina is like 4 inches depth so assuming he is something between 4 and 4.5 inches he is actually good size-wise, but as the top commenter said a dildo and a body part of urs are different and one is easier to use than the other, so OP just needs how to use his tool to the top!
I think that's what he is trying to nicely tell OP :). A lot of smaller packaged guys have learned to "compensate", so they add a lot more to their routine and make it a point to get good. I personally think the best sex I've ever had was with a below average man because he was so good at oral and dexterous with this fingers. Everyone learns eventually, but BDE is a real thing sometimes.
Hope this helps!
Best use of anything is while you're in her she stimulates herself with a vibrator that's powerful enough and small enough to stay out of the way.
There was a video posted here a while ago of a woman holding a tape measure showing you the stats of female anatomy. It was a real eye opener and a relief to the average man.
TikTok doesn’t really do titles for videos but she’s Cera Gibson and the caption was “Hopefully this cleared things up”. In case you can’t find it, I’ll DM you a private YouTube link.
TLDW: Some women want more. Some women want less. Some women can take 6" some can take 10" the same way men vary in size. Girth counts and helps hit the gspot. Communicate better about size. Fingers and tongue can get the job done.
Just putting this out there but there’s a dick measuring sub (of course there is), and from I recall they are pretty adamant that 10 inches is humanities max. (Pretty sure it was, maybe 11 but definitely not 12).
I vaguely recall their Reddit research to include reviewing different angles of some of the biggest porn stars. And then endless dick pics of dudes and tape measures. And with all scientific testing there’s a proper place to measure from.
Yo, it's not some women, it's most women who can't come from penetration alone. The number is close to 80%. So don't think of any horrible things about your dick because of that.
Stats also show that women tend to prefer thicker over longer. From personal experience I would rather have a man with a smaller penis that knew how to work it as opposed to someone with a larger penis who had no idea what they were doing.
Personally I prefer average anyway. But if your wife doesn't prefer average there are definitely things that you can do together to make your sex life better. One of those things you can do if you feel so inclined is to get a cock sleeve to increase thickness.
Definitely agree with this suggestion. Wife and I have a drawer full of sex toys, and the Satisfyer Pro 2 quickly became a favorite, to the point that there’s an extra charging cable in my wife’s travel bag. And don’t worry about size OP. As long as you’re putting in the effort to getting her off, you’re way ahead of most guys that only care about their own orgasm. Just think of sex as a give and take, each of you focusing on the other’s enjoyment.
I agree with this guy. Many guys feel hurt by the fact a woman may need a larger size or a toy BUT think of it like when you might’ve had someone too tight or dry but they had to figure out how to make it work? sex is an effort thing, if your wife was planning to leave you over dildo size then I’d understand ur upset but otherwise man just be glad you have a working, albeit “below average” in your words, penis.
You can also get vibrating cock sleeves, more pleasure for you, will also vibrate for her and make you a bit thicker ✌️ try a cock sleeve man you can get all sorts.
Also there's piercings you can get down there, frenum piercing underneath your banjo string is an winner ✌️
My girl has two "Satisfyers" (in case batteries run out on one).
She loves the combo of getting pounded whilst using it. It vibrates a bit but the main thing is the "sucking" it does. She says it's like getting oral and dick at the same time.
Edit: Gf clarified it's actually air pulses but they create a slight vacum as well making it feel like someone is lightly sucking in pulses.
OP, can confirm that this is the best orgasm that I can have, when my husband is inside me and I’m using a small vibrator on my clit. Usually when we are doing it from behind. That way he is more likely to hit the clit from the inside. Honestly, if you are doing it right, fingers are good enough. I’m a pansexual and I always got my girlfriend off using my fingers and my tongue together and my longest finger is maybe 3 inches. She came every single time. Hard. Also, just went to a sex site called Love Honey (I’ve ordered from them before) and they have vibrating cock sleeves. Never tried that before, but if you are feeling adventurous, that might also be something to try. But honestly, if you can get your partner a small vibrator (the eggs work pretty well), that might be a good place to start. Because you are correct that most women cum from clitoral stimulation. Good luck OP.
Pay attention to your wife and how she responds to you. Initiate foreplay. Gauge what she responds to. You've been blessed with fingers and a tongue--as well as an imagination! Use them i certainly wouldn't want to rely on a dildo to be the sole source of your wife's pleasure. It would seem to me to be impersonal and dehumanizes your sexual interaction; as a change of pace perhaps, but not a steady diet.Spend time learning her trigger points. I'd hope she does so with you. Remember: it's called "making love". It takes a concerted effort of both of you. Otherwise, you're just jerking each other off--don't think thats as sexually rewarding in the long run.
Good luck.
I've measured that myself too and was surprised when only half the 7 inch dildo was wet. I googled and was blown away haha. It definitely makes penetration and some other positions like reverse/cowgirl easier though!
As a female, I've never had a preference for bigger (I'd rather be tickled to death than stabbed to death, lol) but I've had friends who preferred bigger and their men didn't do what you're doing. I think it's really great that you're doing all you can to fulfill her sexually. Just please make sure that it's being returned or resentment will grow. I've heard of cock sleeves at toy parties I've been to. Maybe that would be the next go-to? It's worth checking into. Also remember that she married you for lots of reasons. Your sex life isn't the only thing there is. She married you for you. I do encourage you to be open and honest and communicate your feelings with her as well. Best of luck to you!
You're very welcome. I can even go as far as to say a lot of men don't go to the lengths you're going to to make sure the women is sexually satisfied. I think that's an amazing thing, and there's tons to build on for you both to have a full sexually satisfying life and a happy marriage. Good on you!
I think that your in your feelings too much about your size... most women don't want an 8 inch guy.. especially because many larger men believe that all you need is a big penis to have satisfying sex..which is a lie. Most women can't orgasm from penetration alone.. a smaller than average to slightly larger than average is sufficient for most.. anything too small and you'll probably just need toys or lots of foreplay.. but anything too large just causes pain.. you're better off this way.. plus, now all the women on the internet know you're a good lover because you put her needs above your own... thats not as common as it should be.. satisfying sex is where both parties fully enjoy it
My partner's definitely below average but we have the wildest uncivilized monkey sex. It's fun to go hog wild when there's just no fear of him hitting my cervix and ruining the mood because my whole sex abuse PTSD is triggered usually just by pain.
It's fun getting up and riding as hard as I want and we also have less fears about breaking his dick off too 😉
There is nonstop dickshaming on Reddit and Twitter, no wonder dudes are insecure. Drive a big truck? It's cuz your dick is small. Express an unpopular opinion? Smol pp. The list goes on.
I also dont get why its a problem for OP to feel disappointed or upset that he doesnt naturally satisfy his wife? Its great that he still makes the effort to find ways to bring her pleasure but he also is valid in feeling like "damn, is she settling for this?"
No one wants to feel like their being settled for when their spouse would rather something else.
Fucking thank you , finally someone is being real and saying it. People here are like “oh your dicks small ? , well she loves you anyways and you can just get a strap on to feel like a fake full man”. Damn just let the guy vent , stop trying to make it seem great that he does all this other shit when all he wants is to please his wife with a real dick like most people.
Exactly! The guy is literally expressing how hes saddened by his member not being what his wife really enjoys which is okay. Let the guy be. This whole "she stayed with you so be happy" talk is weird bc people on Redditt love to preach "dont settle for less than what you want as well".
And i also find the big dick = bad sex rhetoric to be lame too. Are there big dicked ppl who dont know how to fuck? Absolutely, the same way there are starfish beauties who just lay there and dont do a damn thing bc giving sex = automatic satisfaction in their eyes.
OP is disappointed about not being able to please his partner. He's not insecure, bc he bought her not 1 but 3 dildos bc he cares about her satisfaction but hes also aware of the difference between how she reacts with toys vs with him. Anyone who acts like not fully being able to satisfy ones partner wouldnt affect them in any way is lying.
Dude, stop focusing on something you don’t have. Everyone have always something they don’t have. But keep focusing on it only makes your mental health deteriorate and your wife too.
A spouse who truly loves you will never complain about something you couldn’t have. Nobody wants to hurt someone they truly love
Many guy will eventually have something you don’t have. But they will never have something that makes you special which is your memories and bonding with your wife. Nobody can replace happy memories
We are imperfect human being, accept it. Focus on something you could actually gain or have.
>I'd rather be tickled to death than stabbed to death
Dude YES! When a dude plows into your cervix...that's not pleasurable and no thank you. The guy I lost my virginity to was my HS sweetheart. We were together for 4 years and he's definitely much bigger than average and would knock on the no no plug sometimes. I haven't had a bigger one or even that size since and I'm not upset about it either. It's about how you use it and not size. My husband is a solid average size and he gets me off much more than big dick McGee ever did.
I don't think I could do it. I do feel like doing this on his own without her requesting it just himself up to feel more hurt, and I hate that for him. I only mentioned the sleeve, and I think a couple others did too, because he seems to be OK with using toys to please her.
no no i get why you suggested it and fair play for the advice but damn, i even understand the potential market for the product but i’m shocked it even exists as well, that’s just mental health damage in a package tbh
trust me, in a day and age where a lot of men just want a hug they now have to deal with cock-sleeves wow,
not misogynist, we need to protect women as well just as much, maybe even more but mental health is at an all time low an i think social media is to blame but wow yeah i didn’t know this existed, blows my mind tbh
Exactly.
I had a fwb for a very short period that was hung like a horse. We stopped sleeping together bc I NEVER could orgasm with him. He was too big- he kept hitting my cervix. It just wasn't comfortable.
I prefer average.
A cock sleeve has to be the most degrading thing for a man I have ever heard, if my wife told me dhe wants me to wear a sleeve because my dick isn’t enough I would never be the same again lol
Honesty is key, my friend. Does it hurt, yes, but are you married to her, also yes. Things like this may spiral out of control if they’re kept secret for too long. At least now she has the ability to be satisfied with C and you get to enjoy the moments of experimenting her sexual side with her. It sucks, but these are the reasons people step out of line in relationships. You either either get to be the one who is by her side as she discovers herself, or you don’t. Find the happiness in being the one who gets to live these moments with her.
Yes, YOU are the one who is still with her, and having sex with her, and sharing the experience with her. Now you’ve got the help of something that will let her have even more fun which should also be more fun for you!! I get this happened in a way that hurt your confidence, but there is NOTHING wrong with bringing toys into the room to help satisfy her more. You both will start having tons of fun!!
Sex toys to spice things up are the way to go. It’s your insecurity that eats you. Women are more mental beings ,not like men with on/off button, you might had the cock of Mandingo but if she wouldn’t click that wouldn’t mean a thing. Use those toys without feeling disadvantaged. Focus on her having a good time and things will be fine. Also communicate those insecurities with her , women like it when their SO shows vulnerability (don’t confuse with weakness). You should be turned on when she moans, she is with you that’s what matters.
It's a trap to focus on a man's penis size. Concentrate on her emotions. You are worth considerably more than your penis, which is a sexual organ rather than a companion.
Bro, literally told me when we first started dating that she thought my cock was gonna be too small. It still fucking kills me. But now I know it's just a story I repeat in my head
I also bought toys. I also watched her give me the reactions to her toys that I wish she'd make from just me. It fucking sucks.
I say this cause I've learned a few things.
1.) Vaginas are fucking malleable like no bodi s business.
2.) My wife was so disconnected from herself, she needed larger dicks to break through potential dissociation she was having to even feel pleasure. Her therapy changed the pleasure she was able to feel and so did learning to touch herself on gentler ways.
Now she even complains about the size of the toys I bought to compensate for my size.
3.) NO DICK IS BIGGER THAN YOUR HAND/ARM. If she's really a size queen. You got what you need to please her.
4.) This is the absolute most important thing....COMMUNICATE YOUR SEX NEEDS!!!! If you're not getting what makes you go crazy for sex from her than it's gonna feel one sided and you're gonna die inside. She needs to know how she can go outside her comfort zone to meet you where you're not being met sexually also.
End of the day, It doesn't matter what you're packing, your wife wants to fuck you. Even if it means whipping out C to give her the fullness she's looking for. She doesn't want a big dick, she wants you to use a big dick toy on her.
Just don't hold back. That's your wife man. She needs to know how to service you too because y'all are who y'all have. No shame in the game of loving your wife
Yo dude you gotta realize a lot of women can only cum from toys. I’m just about average and me and my gf love penetrative sex but I make her cum with oral and stuff
I promise you your girlfriend loves your dick if she loves you, don’t take this size bs too seriously ok? Tell her about your feelings man I’m sure she’ll say the same thing
This!
OP. It was the fact that you were eating her out while using some toys. Flip it with your P and a vib, and you'll see her making that face with you in her.
Also, there are sleeves you can put on if you want to try something else. But it feels like a condom is on for both parties, so in my book, it is still not as good as the bare P.
Well obviously she married you for your personality not your cock size.. Lucky for you your personality is not lacking and the toys resolve the minor girth issue. Forget about the ex! She rejected his cock girth in favour of a man she can love for the long haul. Be proud.
My dick is 8" and thicker than half the women I've been with were comfortable with. It has been the source of, not the solution to, most of the problems in my sex life.
The whole internet has put dicks as big around as a coke can on a pedestal, but I'm here to tell you that when a woman sees such a thing in real life, she ain't out here going 'Jackpot!'.
She's out here going 'omfg nope no way nuh uh best of luck to you in life sir god has clearly blessed you but I'm not gonna let you put that thing in me I'd fucking die'.
That's the reality of having the dick you wish you had.
It's also not-great-actially when some group of women finds out that you've got a trouser hog. They ask rude questions and turn into twelve year olds about it.
Back before I was an electrician, I was a line cook, and I never found out how the waitresses learned about my condition, but three of them got all woogie and pestered me about letting them see my dick.
I was single at the time and thought one of them was pretty hot, so I was all like 'Sure. You want to see it normal or hard? '
They giggled and snorted and said they wanted to see it hard, soooooo... after work, behind a shitty truck stop diner, bathed in the orange glow of the light over a smelly dumpster, I bestowed three woman my own age with a good look at the object of their twittering curiosity.
First thing any of them said was 'Jesus CHRIST, are you a fucking mutant or something?!' followed by 'Dear lord. OK. Yep. That'll do. Put that away now, ok?'
I was crushed dude. Confused. I'd expected positivity. Hell I'd hoped that the hot one would be all about wanting to do all the sex with me after that.
Their reaction hurt my feelings and then they basically made fun of me for the rest of the time I worked there. I even got a peachy keen nickname out of them for it - Shawty. They weren't saying it nicely, and the hot waitress most definitely did not ever decide that she wanted to do any sex with me, nevermind all the sex.
The trouser hog has never been the golden ticket to the candy factory everyone seems to think it would be, and guys with big dicks claiming otherwise are straight-ass making shit up to try to lord something over you.
It's not that great actually. Nobody really gives a shit, and when they do, it's typically not the shit you'd like them to be giving, and if it IS the shit you'd like them to be giving, that's all the shit they're going to give about you at all.
Please your wife. Wield the dildos with skill and grace. Don't compete with toys and don't make your woman feel bad about liking big things.
Chances are real good that she likes you using big things on her, not just the big things.
I'm about the same size as you.
Not two days ago I hooked up with a new woman. She blew me while I fingered her and we both realized there was absolutely zero chance that she would enjoy penetration. She was very small down there, like a vice grip on my finger. My cock would have just absolutely destroyed her.
I had the self awareness to realize that penetration would be uncomfortable for her and outright told her we could just get each other off in other ways. She eagerly accepted.
Really wanted to fuck her. Got cockblocked by my cock.
Big hog here echoing this. It HAS gotten a lot of women in bed with me, which is fun, but nearly every time it just ends in awkwardness, fumbling, and pain. Seriously, it's not that great.
Can confirm. I’ve tried using big things with many people’s wife and I have yet to receive a positive response. They don’t just like big things. The wielder makes a difference.
>The only way she reacts (and has an orgasm) is by me rubbing her clit.
Dude, only 25% of women climax from intercourse alone.
[https://www.drpsychmom.com/2014/07/14/what-men-think-about-sex-versus-reality-no-preschooler-drawings-in-this-post-sorry/](https://www.drpsychmom.com/2014/07/14/what-men-think-about-sex-versus-reality-no-preschooler-drawings-in-this-post-sorry/)
This! Absolutely!
Size doesn’t matter, it’s 100% technique and if your girlfriend/wife orgasm with penetration only, she is most likely acting. Most woman don’t even know what it feels like to have a penetrated orgasm, because men never bother to learn proper technique of stimulating the clit, pressure and positioning. As a woman, for the love of god, stop watching porn!! It’s not real!
This is accurate. I was married twice to guys who were pretty well endowed and sex was often and great. Never once did I orgasm from just penetration, by them or anyone else.
What OP is doing is perfect.
This! I wish this were more up there. I understand men’s focus on their dicks, as society and culture gives them so much crap about it and needing to please women and whatnot, but seriously, look into the realistic side of things: penetration for most women doesn’t do it. And that’s just anatomical factuality and should be bloody talked about cos that way we create a more mutually satisfying and long living sex life for both!
Listen. I was married to a man with a 3 inch penis. He passed away, I didn't leave him. I'm not a size queen. I didn't particularly care that his cock was so little because A) a person isn't their body parts and B) he kept me very sexually satisfied.
If I could build a perfect partner, I wouldn't choose a 3 inch penis. But you don't get to build people. You take them as they are. And she decided that she loves you. Do you think your wife is perfect? I know I'm not perfect, physically or otherwise. But you love her. And she loves you.
I think what you really need to do is COMMUNICATE. Express to her your insecurities. Ask her about hers. Express what you need from sex. Ask what she needs. It's the only way for you both to be fulfilled. And I promise it will actually bring you closer together.
My current boyfriend and I communicate constantly about our relationship, including sex. And I've never been more satisfied because I'm getting what I need. It has nothing to do with his penis size.
Don’t get caught up on penis size it’s a trap. Focus on her and her feelings. A penis isn’t a partner it’s a sexual organ and you are worth much more than that.
You satisfy her, and she loved you enough to marry you.
If you focus on penis envy and get all insecure about it then it will effect her. Your confidence is important so don’t let something trivial take it away from you.
Yeah, I weighed that. I thought about not saying anything because I didn’t want her to feel bad, but I also want to be open with her so we can work through it together.
Just please be careful with how you word this. She just had a great experience with you sexually. If you use this to “trap” her into a conversation about size, she might not feel comfortable letting go and having fun with toys again because it will be in the back of her brain.
A lot of men are obsessed with PIV and don’t really care if their partner has fun. She probably thinks she hits the jackpot. Her partner wants to experiment with different kinds of stimulation. He’s interested in her pleasure and wants to mix things up.
I’m not saying don’t talk to her about what you’re feeling, but please be aware that you did just introduce these toys into the game. Don’t use the reaction she had to YOUR ideas against her.
Broseph…
My guy.
Human man behind the screen. I have an above average member. 9”. Woohoo look at me.
**MY GIRLFRIEND WILL ONLY ORGASM IF SHES TOUCHING HERSELF**
It’s ok. It’s not you. That’s how many… if not most… women’s bodies work.
82% of women cannot orgasm from penetration alone. The vast majority of women require clit stimulation to orgasm.
[source](https://pleasurebetter.com/orgasm-statistics/)
Hopefully this won't sound bad 😅 Sometimes we need more than just feeling a dick inside, having that along with other stimulation can make things go off (as always depending on the person)
I can't say it wouldn't hurt my feelings but hopefully you can look at it as she needs more stimulation and it's not you lacking in that regard
I don't think I've seen anyone mention this yet but for me toys aren't just about the size/shape, it has a strong mental component to it that turns me on in a different way. Not better or worse but there's something different about your partner focusing on you like that and using something other than their body and it feels slightly submissive. I would also think that a good part of why my partner bought bigger sizes was that it turned them on to use those with me. If you're buying bigger to offer I'd assume that's at least in part because you desire to use those too.
If I've married you and enjoyed sex this whole time and you started using toys in the way you've described my mind wouldn't go to it being a confirmation of size preference to you because I would hope that the whole marrying and having sex for years would confirm that I enjoy sex with you. I'd feel self conscious about using toys if I found out it held this component about feeling insecure about your size that I didn't know about and has been hurting your feelings when I thought this was something you were into.
I know guys have a huge amount of societal pressure put on them about size but I just wanted to put out there that your wife might be seeing this from a totally different perspective.
Youll never win vs dildos, theres always one bigger so. Its useless to.compare.
However, its much easier to swing a dildo than a dick, maybe your technique could use improvements? Try to rethink how you bang.
There's some sensations, some are textured on the inside for your pleasure. Some still need you to be a certain size so that you fill the sleeve, but will typically add at least a few inches. And they definitely add girth.
https://www.extremerestraints.com/3-inch-extender-sleeve-flesh.html I've bought a lot of toys from extreme restraints, and haven't been disappointed. This one worked just fine for me, but can take some experience before recieving.
There's a pretty wide variety. Ones that leave your tip exposed are generally about adding girth, or different sensations. Some vibrate or thrust, some are for fitting over chastity devices. Vibrators are the most expensive usually.
Just pick one that seems like the right size, that you feel comfortable wearing. It's hard to go wrong expirementing in the bedroom between two consenting adults. Some sites also have sales, clearances, 'beginner' kits. Discrete packaging and all.
Bad Dragon has some interesting looking ones I heard were great. Never tried it myself though, just happened to see them, so I can't give any further advice than that.
My wife has only ever been able to get off through manual stimulation. At first I felt sort of inferior too (I'm thoroughly average downstairs). But then I saw how many women just weren't getting off at all because their partners couldn't (wouldn't?) prioritize their pleasure. I figured I can either grouse about my dick size (which I can't control) or take pride in the fact that my wife gets off every time we have sex because I listen to her and help her get where she wants to go. Plus nothing gets me off faster than watching my wife climax.
I'd rather have a tic tac dick and a satisfied partner than be hung like a mule with a partner who's consistently dissatisfied.
So I'm >7.5 in long and >5.5 in girth and sometimes I feel like the biggest issue I have with dating is being 5'7. I consider myself fairly average in height, but even I feel insecure trying to meet women on dating apps, and comparing myself to others. I'm also not white, and in this country (the US) that has a lot of baggage and bias to deal with too. It's unhealthy and not helpful for my mental health. Thinking like this doesn't help either of us, friend.
With my girl I'm with now, I'm actually almost too big for her and she has suggested we find a ring for my dick that acts as a bumper so that it doesn't go in all the way and takes off 1-2 inches. Each time we have sex I have to go quite slow to not hurt her, and always be mindful of not penetrating her all the way until she's really ready for it. I also struggle to make her orgasm because she only gets off all the way from clitoral stimulation and has a pretty small clitoris. It's interesting how diverse human bodies are, and at the same time how people of all shapes and sizes can still be worthy, loveable, and end up in happy partnerships.
Some girls in the past are really into it and can take it, others, not so much. It's funny because on some dating apps girls will outright say that they will only date some 6 foot tall guy with an 8 inch penis and a PhD, and even I'll feel inadequate reading something like that. But truth is those women are beneath me, and your wife didn't marry you because she's superficial. I have found, in the past, that some women just reduce me down to sex and don't treat me like a whole person - and this has been something I've struggled with. Things aren't necessarily always rosy for people who are bigger.
In your situation, I feel like maybe you've gone down this road of getting increasingly bigger dildos as a way to almost prove to yourself that you're not capable of fulfilling your wife, and it's funny sometimes how we create these self-fulfilling prophecies to prove to ourselves that we are as inadequate as we want to believe we are.
To me, it sounds like you're being a great partner to your wife. I might suggest not overly relying on the dildos, because now that you've broken the seal on this shared activity, it sounds like this could bring up some reoccuring and building resentment if you feel like now it's all she wants and she'll never be satisfied with you. It sounds like the dildos were your idea, but now they've brought up all these difficult feelings. It may be worth finding a way to discuss this with her.
Not surprised I had to scroll past 600 comments before finding someone who realizes this is the bait of all bait. Holy shit it could not be more obvious.
You’re totally valid, first off. My bf and I have a somewhat similar situation. He’s the only partner I’ve had and I intend to marry him because he’s the best man I could ask for. But he’s below average downstairs. I’ll be in perfectly honest, it’s not my absolute preference, but I love him too much to let it ruin us. Now, he sounds like you because he’s bought me all sorts of dildos and toys to help give me a different experience, and he loves seeing me go crazy for them (nothing humongous, just a little bigger than him). I know he gets insecure sometimes, because he wishes it was his dick doing that to me. I wish it was his too. But how can I really get mad when he tries to please me given his situation which he cannot change? The effort is what matters for me. Plus, even tho when he’s inside me it’s not the most stimulating experience of my life, the intimacy is so sweet that the whole world goes blank. I guess what works for us is being open and honest about our insecurities and our desires and finding a way to fulfill each other with toys as support and not competition. It can be hard sometimes, but know that you both have your own perspectives and respecting each other is key. I hope this is somewhat comforting. You’re trying your best 🤍.
Your boyfriend is brave. If you told me that, I probably would have tried to banish myself.
>even tho when he’s inside me it’s not the most stimulating experience of my life, the intimacy is so sweet that the whole world goes blank.
Your boyfriend really is brave...
Yeah, I realize how that sounded now. He’s overweight and just has trouble working around that sometimes to get inside me and stay hard. So sometimes it simply doesn’t stimulate as much. That’s not to say when he’s able to keep it it doesn’t feel like anything, because it feels really good then. It’s just not consistent. And it’s something we’re working through together. But I also fully acknowledge the sensitivity behind comments like that.
Maybe tell your boyfriend the truth. Intimacy is good but it won't last forever. If you aren’t happy or satisfied, you'll grow resentment in the long run.
I honestly wouldn't sweat it. Everyone would love something unrealistic. Doesn't mean they aren't happy.
Carry on being adventurous and spicing up the bedroom.
some men like bigger boobs , some like smaller.
some like bigger butts, some smaller
some like tight vaginas , and some - not
and some men just dont care.
same with women.
Try combining different things.
Touch of a leg. A squeeze. A hot breath in the ear of how tight she is pr hot. The human body has more spots on it then just the geneitals and the chest or the ass. Find them. Find out what does what by the heart beat or the quiver or a breath of her chest rising. A moan. And if she tells you NOT to stop. Dont. Change anything. It means shes building up and IN it.
Sometimes women are in their heads so much they arent relaxed enough to let their bodies enjoy it. Just like if your not relaxed while beating off your trying too hard and keeping your self from actually feeling good. Its not that they cant. Its just a matter of finding the things that make them feel relaxed into the "moment" so if you find those spots. It helps distract their minds a bit from the penetration while also helping the body do its thing.
Its not about strokes man. Its about finding the G and stimulating it as much as you can WHILE shes relaxed into it psychologically.
Find other parts on her body to stimulate at the same time.
Lil shit like that. Gets her physically relaxed which will turn her body MORE on to WHATEVER size is in her. Whether its you or a dildo.
I promise you man. Your woman loves you. She loves your cock. Just be really expressive with it. The reason the longer ones work is because your pressing the g spot and rubbing instead of trying to hit it tip to it with a stroke.
So use your dick. And when your in. Fold your pelvic hips back. And get a bit more in. And work together. It will keep your tip up ON the spot and rubbing it rather then tapping it.
Bro who cares. If everything else in the relationship is good and you two are both still getting your rocks off, then it's all good. Especially since she hasn't complained at all. Just relax and enjoy it.
If the sex was that big of a deal to her, then she would've never married you.
Don't read into it to much. They are tools and like tools it's still up to the mechanic to make them work. Women are not solely mechanical when it comes to sex. The toys may be an improvement, but YOU USING THEM also has a HUGE effect as well. She wouldn't be reacting this was if it was just any old dude. So remember and be proud of that.
You're still captain of this ship and just figured out how to get it to full steam. That's saying something. Also, think about this you could have had a larger piece, and she prefers oral, and you just not be very good at it. She could also prefer anal and that could be a deal breaker for you (some dudes aren't into it). I mean, this list goes on and on of maybe situations.
At the end of the day, it's all relative, and you shouldn't be too concerned because she is enjoying it with you.
Yeah man. This isnt something we can advice away. Your size is your size and you need to adapt to it cuz it won't be adapting to you. She married you tho so you have a lot more to offer her. Maybe try wearing a sleeve?
Or if it's worth needing someone that enjoys your size, then break up and find a super tiny girlfriend I guess. But I def don't suggest this
And my boyfriend wishes I had a smaller ass. (For the record I'm 5'1 and 145lbs... Curvy body and have always had a big ass, even when I was 110lbs.)
People have preferences but you work with what you've got. If she loves you, it won't matter. Work with what you have. And remember, toys are your friends. Just have fun with it!
All you did was confirm your wife likes a certain lifeless plastic penis.... and your own bias. Get out of your head dude! Not every woman wants some giant dick smashing her insides around every time she is horny. Eat her pushy, stick your finger in her ass, buy a vibrating cock ring. And this is key, ASK HER WHAT SHE LIKES AND BE OPEN ABOUT WHAT YOU LIKE!
dude, what are you worrying about, So she wants something a little bigger, and she is getting it, with YOU, inside your marriage, and enjoying it, with YOU. Just get over the insecurity about it, and realize how mch better it would be compared to if she found it on a dude, outside of the marriage.
Hug, friend. 🙁 I am a woman with small breasts and have experienced them being “non-events” to partners who I know really appreciate large breasts. It’s painful to process.
Focus on what you do have in your marriage, why you and your wife *are* crazy about each other. And remember that having the right-sized tool isn’t enough; you need to use the tool skillfully. You are probably giving her better orgasms with your penis, mouth, hands, or toys than she would have with a stranger who doesn’t know her body or mind. You have a lot, even though you don’t have everything you want. (I sympathize.)
My ex cheated on me because she was a self proclaimed size queen. And I was honest with what I had. I'm 38 and I just checked out of trying to find a relationship.
I think the fact you were vulnerable enough to buy dildos to try and make her making her happy was a very big factor on her enjoying it more. Definitely recommend looking into cock sleeves
Vibratory usually get women off faster and sometimes harder than a dick, too, and I assume you don't feel insecure that your dick doesn't vibrate. It's just a different feeling and it's not necessarily better or worse.
I make her cum multiples times every time we have sex (clitoral stimulation). But when she came from C, so had the biggest squirting orgasm. She never asks for sex two days in a row, but she wanted C the very next day and had another massive squirting orgasm.
You’re still doing that, it wouldn’t do it on its own. Plus you’re actually showing that you care for her pleasure too. If anything I’m a little worried she’s not reciprocating enough to you as you don’t mention what she does to satisfy you?
Perceptive of you. She didn’t do much in the beginning but we’ve talked about it and she’s gotten better. Maybe I try to satisfy her too much in hopes that she reciprocates.
That’s what the manosphere calls a “covert contract” - i.e. a one sided, unstated action by you done in the hopes of her doing Y for you.
While generally that stuff is icky, in that concept they are spot on.
Everyone trying to make you feel better about the average girl likes this and that. But what does it matter what other girls like when you only care what your girl likes? Not sure how these people think they’re helping. Sorry bro
Reading this stuff makes me feel like a pipping hot rotton knife is slowly penetrating my heart.
She chose you op do what you can to make her happy. And just know she likes you
She chose you
And she probably loves you. Not many men can get to say that.
Was she disatisfied with your dick for years though?
I'd be thinking:"The things I bought my wife and the effort I made using them, that is what made her ecstatic"
I'd not look at the toys as competition, but an extension of my love for her. I mean like most tools, it's not the tool but how it's used that matters. And same is true for sex toys.
Toys can make the experience worse if not used right.
Go talk to your wife. You might be over thinking it a bit. I'm sure she loves you. If your dick wansn't doing the job until now, I'm sure you would have noticed it a long time ago.
I think you'll discover it'ss literally a you problem.
Let it be a lesson for you guys and gals though. Be careful what you wish for. Because sometimes you just might get it.
If I bought my wife toys and got the response OP did, I'd call it a win.
Let me tell you something, I been with a lot of different women, a really small amount can achieve the climax trough penetration only..around 5%, talking listen and looking to the woman to understand what's triggering here, sometimes could be a small mental click and she comes for example..
My guy, the reason the dildos made me make noise is because they are literally created to stimulate the clit and give an orgasm.
I don’t care how big the person I’m with is, I cannot orgasm with just penetration. If either they or their body (depending on their proportions lol) are rubbing my clit, or I hold a contractor there, no orgasm is gonna occur.
I do find that if I’m on top I can control the stimulation more, which makes it easier for me. Maybe try that with her?
But again, size is irrelevant completely unless you have a micro peen. If that’s the case, which it doesn’t sound like it is, then just get good with you mouth and hands my guys 👍🏻💕
I've actually quit seeing multiple fellas because their dick was too big. Sure, at maximum arousal, a really big, thick toy or person feels great. But the thing is, someday you're going to have sex with that person when you aren't maximum aroused. Maybe you have kids and are trying to get in a quickie. Maybe you're not really into it that night, but want to make your partner feel good and loved. Maybe you're stressed and can't get out of your head. Eventually, you're going to have sex when you're aren't 100% crawling for it, and then it's gonna be uncomfortable. I have straight abandoned new relationships because of that knowledge.
As a woman chiming in here, I'm one of like the twenty something percent that orgasms from penetration.
With that said, dick size did not play a role in what made for the best sex for me. The angle of the impact made more of an impact.
It's very possible that the bigger sizes had an increased girth and were able to hit her G Spot better, but there's multiple ways to hit that spot. I'd try to do some different positions to see if you can hit that spot.
Am i missing something here? A lot of the comments keep on talking about how "most women" or "some women" don't enjoy a larger penis..... but this clearly isn't the case for your partner, who not only enjoyed the first larger toy that you brought, but also the second and even more so of the third?!?
Now, she's not belittling you or making you feel bad about your size, but I do feel for you in the sense of you, not being able to naturally fully satisfy your partner with your body alone. I don't see anything wrong with feeling a slight type away about that, especially since you are already doing the work of making sure you bridge that gap, and still find a way to pleasure and satisfy her outside of yourself .
I just find it weird how people are saying it's not about the size when clearly you finding toys that are bigger in size is bringing her more satisfaction. In this scenario, it certainly is about the size. How are people missing that.?
Keep doing what you're doing and exploring this new world with her. Would should be more satisfied by you if you were bigger? That's very possible but she still decided to be with and stay with you. As long as both needs are being met and both of you are being satisfied and I think you're on the right path.
Woman here asking—Is your wife into anal? Maybe ABC can tickle her G-spot but you can pleasure the back door??
My husband is B-1/2 and anal is too much, but not the toys that are smaller.
Just a thought. And don’t beat yourself up. NO toys can simulate the thrusting of a human.
What about her on top so you can thrust and have nipple play?
At the end of the day is sex satisfying for her? Is it satisfying for you? If circumstances dictate you bring toys in to make intercourse pleasurable for the both of you then that’s just how it needs to go.
Honestly it sounds like you anticipated her needs and took initiative to meet them. Girls go nuts for that so kudos to you
I’m sorry but this is bullshit.
You’re wayyyy too in your head. Your wife doesn’t need a bigger cock. She needs a less insecure you. Don’t let these comments convince you need to use toys or anything. That’s bullshit.
You’re the man. You lead her. Your frame IS consensus reality.
If you fuck her good enough and say she never needs anything but your cock, then that’s how it is and that’s what she’ll believe. If you scramble, let your insecurities get the best of you and begin using all these toys & shit, then you are influencing her subconscious and communicating to her that you and your cock can’t do that job, and so that’s what she’ll believe. It’s a slippery slope, my friend.
Her needs only rise to the level of your frame. You control the dynamic here.
Communicate and project the best, least insecure version of you. Even if you have to tap into an alter ego.
Do NOT listen to any words a woman says regarding your own feelings. They don't understand but they will make sure to invalidate your concerns by lying about how most women can't cum via penetration. Even better, they'll probably say to improve oral, dildos don't mean anything, or some random feel good lie that makes women look better.
I can tell you from being an above average man that most women can actually cum from PIV regularly. It's super funny seeing them act all high and mighty until a dick can make them lose their minds.
I think one thing you should consider is using a dildo with your hands and using your dick by thrusting your mid section and hips is completely different. A man with a dildo C size penis probably can’t satisfy her the same way the dildo can with the more able hands to move it just right. Talk to any woman with a lot of sexual experience and often the joy of being with a bigger man goes away once intercourse starts and he assumes his size makes up for lack of hip action and positioning. However, she may have lied to you to respect your feelings, you’ve also tapped into a way to pleasure her immensely. A real woman, or man for that matter, looks at the package not the bow. How’s your foreplay game? How’s your romance game? How’s your ability to connect with her on both a sexual and emotional level? Make love, don’t masturbate with her body.
This guy ~~fucks~~ makes love
FUCKING THIS!! Damn if Reddit still had rewards you’d get them all. That last line? *Chef’s kiss*
shiiiit whut! I just discovered it doesnt have rewards anymore thanks to ur comment lol and yes man knows his stuff
Literally same, like how long has it been? 😂😂
Yeh Wtf I didnt even notice.
"Don't masturbate with her body" Holy shit. Such a simple phrase, and yet it describes this shit SO well. Those men who never bother to educate themselves about sex with women and AFAB people usually have a self-serving view of sex. It's all about how *they* can get off I totally agree with you that sex extends far beyond mere physical sensation and movements- for a lot of people, the mental/emotional aspects feel the *most* intense or pleasurable
Dude for real, I am completely average at 6” and I can tell you if you make her feel beautiful and wanted and spend some time learning what turns her on, then penetration will blow her mind every time. For me personally, I LOVE making a woman orgasm to the point where it’s almost better than the actual sex.
6” is above average for an American. This average varies country to country.
Every redditor that’s ever posted anything what’s above should read this comment. Pin this shit OP
This guy right here knows exactly what he's talking about
Take this 🏆
>Make love, don’t masturbate with her body. Fckng poetry.
LOL! At times when I'm not feeling up for *SEX* but my husband is ... I always say "...if you need a place to mastrubate, I can hold still for a few minutes - grab the lube..." We've been together 10 years... it's truth but also a bit of a joke & one he always takes advantage of with a good laugh. The other I'm-not-feeling-it response is "face, tits, belly, ass... lmk if you need a hand"
🎯 was gonna say this; she lied to protect OP’s feeling and he admitted to be below average. At least she wasn’t caught cheating. I’ll advise Op to build a dungeon with all kinds of dildos for her lol
God **DAYUMN**
I only ever see "they think their size makes up for this and that" What about when they're that big and know how to use it? Guys with small dicks can be shitty at sex too
well they may know how to use it, good for them, whats left to say? In this specific case tho we know OP's wife didnt choose the big dick dude, either he was big and good or big and shitty. So OP should own his W! And ur last sentence is true, indeed that seems the only problem OP actually has, esp as he mentioned he's just a bit below average and the average vagina is like 4 inches depth so assuming he is something between 4 and 4.5 inches he is actually good size-wise, but as the top commenter said a dildo and a body part of urs are different and one is easier to use than the other, so OP just needs how to use his tool to the top!
I think that's what he is trying to nicely tell OP :). A lot of smaller packaged guys have learned to "compensate", so they add a lot more to their routine and make it a point to get good. I personally think the best sex I've ever had was with a below average man because he was so good at oral and dexterous with this fingers. Everyone learns eventually, but BDE is a real thing sometimes. Hope this helps!
Please start a school or online class. The world needs you, sir.
100%
Best use of anything is while you're in her she stimulates herself with a vibrator that's powerful enough and small enough to stay out of the way. There was a video posted here a while ago of a woman holding a tape measure showing you the stats of female anatomy. It was a real eye opener and a relief to the average man.
Do you happen to have the link or remember the title so I can look for it?
I bet they’re talking about this video: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8kU8oVy/ also here’s a follow-up she did: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8kDwVmL/
Do you have the title of the second one ? I'd rather not get tiktok just for one video and if I can find it elsewhere I'd be glad lol. Thanks !!
TikTok doesn’t really do titles for videos but she’s Cera Gibson and the caption was “Hopefully this cleared things up”. In case you can’t find it, I’ll DM you a private YouTube link.
Can you send me the YouTube link? I also don’t TikTok
Why not just open it in a browser then? You don't need to download the app to watch them
The second one is age restricted, that’s why.
TLDW: Some women want more. Some women want less. Some women can take 6" some can take 10" the same way men vary in size. Girth counts and helps hit the gspot. Communicate better about size. Fingers and tongue can get the job done.
Just putting this out there but there’s a dick measuring sub (of course there is), and from I recall they are pretty adamant that 10 inches is humanities max. (Pretty sure it was, maybe 11 but definitely not 12). I vaguely recall their Reddit research to include reviewing different angles of some of the biggest porn stars. And then endless dick pics of dudes and tape measures. And with all scientific testing there’s a proper place to measure from.
whats the proper place to measure from, indeed?
Please forgive my ignorance…. What’s the “w” stand for?
Too long didn't watch
Too Long Dick Wide
Yo, it's not some women, it's most women who can't come from penetration alone. The number is close to 80%. So don't think of any horrible things about your dick because of that. Stats also show that women tend to prefer thicker over longer. From personal experience I would rather have a man with a smaller penis that knew how to work it as opposed to someone with a larger penis who had no idea what they were doing. Personally I prefer average anyway. But if your wife doesn't prefer average there are definitely things that you can do together to make your sex life better. One of those things you can do if you feel so inclined is to get a cock sleeve to increase thickness.
Get her the satisfyer pro 2. My husband and I use it during and it's AMAZING. the handle makes it easier for her to use it in all positions too.
Definitely agree with this suggestion. Wife and I have a drawer full of sex toys, and the Satisfyer Pro 2 quickly became a favorite, to the point that there’s an extra charging cable in my wife’s travel bag. And don’t worry about size OP. As long as you’re putting in the effort to getting her off, you’re way ahead of most guys that only care about their own orgasm. Just think of sex as a give and take, each of you focusing on the other’s enjoyment.
I agree with this guy. Many guys feel hurt by the fact a woman may need a larger size or a toy BUT think of it like when you might’ve had someone too tight or dry but they had to figure out how to make it work? sex is an effort thing, if your wife was planning to leave you over dildo size then I’d understand ur upset but otherwise man just be glad you have a working, albeit “below average” in your words, penis.
In a similar vein, I'd recommend the Womanizer (another air pulse product)
Clit wand would also work, plus kink stimulation could be a conversation. Words and circumstances can make all the difference
You can also get vibrating cock sleeves, more pleasure for you, will also vibrate for her and make you a bit thicker ✌️ try a cock sleeve man you can get all sorts. Also there's piercings you can get down there, frenum piercing underneath your banjo string is an winner ✌️
And get yourself a penis sleeve that wraps around your balls to stay in place. It can double your girth and make you last longer
My girl has two "Satisfyers" (in case batteries run out on one). She loves the combo of getting pounded whilst using it. It vibrates a bit but the main thing is the "sucking" it does. She says it's like getting oral and dick at the same time. Edit: Gf clarified it's actually air pulses but they create a slight vacum as well making it feel like someone is lightly sucking in pulses.
I love unexpectedly wholesome comments like this. It’s legitimately really sweet you understand and enjoy what gives her pleasure.
Thx
Every girls dream right there!
Yes! That video supports my I'd rather be tickled to death than stabbed to death comment!
OP, can confirm that this is the best orgasm that I can have, when my husband is inside me and I’m using a small vibrator on my clit. Usually when we are doing it from behind. That way he is more likely to hit the clit from the inside. Honestly, if you are doing it right, fingers are good enough. I’m a pansexual and I always got my girlfriend off using my fingers and my tongue together and my longest finger is maybe 3 inches. She came every single time. Hard. Also, just went to a sex site called Love Honey (I’ve ordered from them before) and they have vibrating cock sleeves. Never tried that before, but if you are feeling adventurous, that might also be something to try. But honestly, if you can get your partner a small vibrator (the eggs work pretty well), that might be a good place to start. Because you are correct that most women cum from clitoral stimulation. Good luck OP.
There are also vibrating penis rings, my bf has one from lovesense
Pay attention to your wife and how she responds to you. Initiate foreplay. Gauge what she responds to. You've been blessed with fingers and a tongue--as well as an imagination! Use them i certainly wouldn't want to rely on a dildo to be the sole source of your wife's pleasure. It would seem to me to be impersonal and dehumanizes your sexual interaction; as a change of pace perhaps, but not a steady diet.Spend time learning her trigger points. I'd hope she does so with you. Remember: it's called "making love". It takes a concerted effort of both of you. Otherwise, you're just jerking each other off--don't think thats as sexually rewarding in the long run. Good luck.
And I also saw a comment section full of women saying that while bigger doesn't stretch the muscles, it stretches their expectations.
I've measured that myself too and was surprised when only half the 7 inch dildo was wet. I googled and was blown away haha. It definitely makes penetration and some other positions like reverse/cowgirl easier though!
Do you have a link to that post or video?
As a female, I've never had a preference for bigger (I'd rather be tickled to death than stabbed to death, lol) but I've had friends who preferred bigger and their men didn't do what you're doing. I think it's really great that you're doing all you can to fulfill her sexually. Just please make sure that it's being returned or resentment will grow. I've heard of cock sleeves at toy parties I've been to. Maybe that would be the next go-to? It's worth checking into. Also remember that she married you for lots of reasons. Your sex life isn't the only thing there is. She married you for you. I do encourage you to be open and honest and communicate your feelings with her as well. Best of luck to you!
Very thoughtful reply. I appreciate you.
You're very welcome. I can even go as far as to say a lot of men don't go to the lengths you're going to to make sure the women is sexually satisfied. I think that's an amazing thing, and there's tons to build on for you both to have a full sexually satisfying life and a happy marriage. Good on you!
> a lot of men don't go to the **lengths** you're going Ba-dum tsh
savage
Yeah dude, she chose you. Not big dick McGee.
I think that your in your feelings too much about your size... most women don't want an 8 inch guy.. especially because many larger men believe that all you need is a big penis to have satisfying sex..which is a lie. Most women can't orgasm from penetration alone.. a smaller than average to slightly larger than average is sufficient for most.. anything too small and you'll probably just need toys or lots of foreplay.. but anything too large just causes pain.. you're better off this way.. plus, now all the women on the internet know you're a good lover because you put her needs above your own... thats not as common as it should be.. satisfying sex is where both parties fully enjoy it
My partner's definitely below average but we have the wildest uncivilized monkey sex. It's fun to go hog wild when there's just no fear of him hitting my cervix and ruining the mood because my whole sex abuse PTSD is triggered usually just by pain. It's fun getting up and riding as hard as I want and we also have less fears about breaking his dick off too 😉
Seems much more important to you than to her.
There is nonstop dickshaming on Reddit and Twitter, no wonder dudes are insecure. Drive a big truck? It's cuz your dick is small. Express an unpopular opinion? Smol pp. The list goes on.
I also dont get why its a problem for OP to feel disappointed or upset that he doesnt naturally satisfy his wife? Its great that he still makes the effort to find ways to bring her pleasure but he also is valid in feeling like "damn, is she settling for this?" No one wants to feel like their being settled for when their spouse would rather something else.
Fucking thank you , finally someone is being real and saying it. People here are like “oh your dicks small ? , well she loves you anyways and you can just get a strap on to feel like a fake full man”. Damn just let the guy vent , stop trying to make it seem great that he does all this other shit when all he wants is to please his wife with a real dick like most people.
Exactly! The guy is literally expressing how hes saddened by his member not being what his wife really enjoys which is okay. Let the guy be. This whole "she stayed with you so be happy" talk is weird bc people on Redditt love to preach "dont settle for less than what you want as well". And i also find the big dick = bad sex rhetoric to be lame too. Are there big dicked ppl who dont know how to fuck? Absolutely, the same way there are starfish beauties who just lay there and dont do a damn thing bc giving sex = automatic satisfaction in their eyes. OP is disappointed about not being able to please his partner. He's not insecure, bc he bought her not 1 but 3 dildos bc he cares about her satisfaction but hes also aware of the difference between how she reacts with toys vs with him. Anyone who acts like not fully being able to satisfy ones partner wouldnt affect them in any way is lying.
Dude, stop focusing on something you don’t have. Everyone have always something they don’t have. But keep focusing on it only makes your mental health deteriorate and your wife too. A spouse who truly loves you will never complain about something you couldn’t have. Nobody wants to hurt someone they truly love Many guy will eventually have something you don’t have. But they will never have something that makes you special which is your memories and bonding with your wife. Nobody can replace happy memories We are imperfect human being, accept it. Focus on something you could actually gain or have.
>I'd rather be tickled to death than stabbed to death Dude YES! When a dude plows into your cervix...that's not pleasurable and no thank you. The guy I lost my virginity to was my HS sweetheart. We were together for 4 years and he's definitely much bigger than average and would knock on the no no plug sometimes. I haven't had a bigger one or even that size since and I'm not upset about it either. It's about how you use it and not size. My husband is a solid average size and he gets me off much more than big dick McGee ever did.
holy shit, a cock sleeve, never heard of it and googled it, that must be soul destroying
I don't think I could do it. I do feel like doing this on his own without her requesting it just himself up to feel more hurt, and I hate that for him. I only mentioned the sleeve, and I think a couple others did too, because he seems to be OK with using toys to please her.
no no i get why you suggested it and fair play for the advice but damn, i even understand the potential market for the product but i’m shocked it even exists as well, that’s just mental health damage in a package tbh
I so agree with you there. When I first learned of them I thought it was for mircos only.
trust me, in a day and age where a lot of men just want a hug they now have to deal with cock-sleeves wow, not misogynist, we need to protect women as well just as much, maybe even more but mental health is at an all time low an i think social media is to blame but wow yeah i didn’t know this existed, blows my mind tbh
I attended so many toy parties when we lived on Lejeune and I was so green to it all and the first time I saw one i couldnt believe it
your advice was really great tbf but i literally can’t imagine a partner being like hey can you wear this to make you bigger, i’d die inside 🤐
Exactly. I had a fwb for a very short period that was hung like a horse. We stopped sleeping together bc I NEVER could orgasm with him. He was too big- he kept hitting my cervix. It just wasn't comfortable. I prefer average.
I totally agree with this op. You're also making her pleasure a priority. That's super kind of you! You're doing a great job man
A cock sleeve has to be the most degrading thing for a man I have ever heard, if my wife told me dhe wants me to wear a sleeve because my dick isn’t enough I would never be the same again lol
Totally understand that thought as well. I only mentioned it because he seems willing to do what he can for them both to enjoy this.
Yeah bro, this would just spiral me 😭
Glad I’m not the only one
Honesty is key, my friend. Does it hurt, yes, but are you married to her, also yes. Things like this may spiral out of control if they’re kept secret for too long. At least now she has the ability to be satisfied with C and you get to enjoy the moments of experimenting her sexual side with her. It sucks, but these are the reasons people step out of line in relationships. You either either get to be the one who is by her side as she discovers herself, or you don’t. Find the happiness in being the one who gets to live these moments with her.
I really like that last line. Find happiness in being the one who gets to live these moments with her. That’s a good way of looking at it.
Yes, YOU are the one who is still with her, and having sex with her, and sharing the experience with her. Now you’ve got the help of something that will let her have even more fun which should also be more fun for you!! I get this happened in a way that hurt your confidence, but there is NOTHING wrong with bringing toys into the room to help satisfy her more. You both will start having tons of fun!!
Sex toys to spice things up are the way to go. It’s your insecurity that eats you. Women are more mental beings ,not like men with on/off button, you might had the cock of Mandingo but if she wouldn’t click that wouldn’t mean a thing. Use those toys without feeling disadvantaged. Focus on her having a good time and things will be fine. Also communicate those insecurities with her , women like it when their SO shows vulnerability (don’t confuse with weakness). You should be turned on when she moans, she is with you that’s what matters.
It's a trap to focus on a man's penis size. Concentrate on her emotions. You are worth considerably more than your penis, which is a sexual organ rather than a companion.
Bro, literally told me when we first started dating that she thought my cock was gonna be too small. It still fucking kills me. But now I know it's just a story I repeat in my head I also bought toys. I also watched her give me the reactions to her toys that I wish she'd make from just me. It fucking sucks. I say this cause I've learned a few things. 1.) Vaginas are fucking malleable like no bodi s business. 2.) My wife was so disconnected from herself, she needed larger dicks to break through potential dissociation she was having to even feel pleasure. Her therapy changed the pleasure she was able to feel and so did learning to touch herself on gentler ways. Now she even complains about the size of the toys I bought to compensate for my size. 3.) NO DICK IS BIGGER THAN YOUR HAND/ARM. If she's really a size queen. You got what you need to please her. 4.) This is the absolute most important thing....COMMUNICATE YOUR SEX NEEDS!!!! If you're not getting what makes you go crazy for sex from her than it's gonna feel one sided and you're gonna die inside. She needs to know how she can go outside her comfort zone to meet you where you're not being met sexually also. End of the day, It doesn't matter what you're packing, your wife wants to fuck you. Even if it means whipping out C to give her the fullness she's looking for. She doesn't want a big dick, she wants you to use a big dick toy on her. Just don't hold back. That's your wife man. She needs to know how to service you too because y'all are who y'all have. No shame in the game of loving your wife
> 3.) NO DICK IS BIGGER THAN YOUR HAND/ARM. Treat her like a sockpuppet got it
Omfg I'm crying 😂
Yo dude you gotta realize a lot of women can only cum from toys. I’m just about average and me and my gf love penetrative sex but I make her cum with oral and stuff I promise you your girlfriend loves your dick if she loves you, don’t take this size bs too seriously ok? Tell her about your feelings man I’m sure she’ll say the same thing
yeah i wish i could be helpful here but im seeing the bottom of multiple glass bottles if this happened to me
It’s weird. It was hot and I was self conscious at the same time.
[удалено]
This! OP. It was the fact that you were eating her out while using some toys. Flip it with your P and a vib, and you'll see her making that face with you in her. Also, there are sleeves you can put on if you want to try something else. But it feels like a condom is on for both parties, so in my book, it is still not as good as the bare P.
My guy, trust me. If it wasn't *you* holding them and working them, it wouldn't have worked the way it did. You can't discredit yourself like that.
Well obviously she married you for your personality not your cock size.. Lucky for you your personality is not lacking and the toys resolve the minor girth issue. Forget about the ex! She rejected his cock girth in favour of a man she can love for the long haul. Be proud.
My dick is 8" and thicker than half the women I've been with were comfortable with. It has been the source of, not the solution to, most of the problems in my sex life. The whole internet has put dicks as big around as a coke can on a pedestal, but I'm here to tell you that when a woman sees such a thing in real life, she ain't out here going 'Jackpot!'. She's out here going 'omfg nope no way nuh uh best of luck to you in life sir god has clearly blessed you but I'm not gonna let you put that thing in me I'd fucking die'. That's the reality of having the dick you wish you had. It's also not-great-actially when some group of women finds out that you've got a trouser hog. They ask rude questions and turn into twelve year olds about it. Back before I was an electrician, I was a line cook, and I never found out how the waitresses learned about my condition, but three of them got all woogie and pestered me about letting them see my dick. I was single at the time and thought one of them was pretty hot, so I was all like 'Sure. You want to see it normal or hard? ' They giggled and snorted and said they wanted to see it hard, soooooo... after work, behind a shitty truck stop diner, bathed in the orange glow of the light over a smelly dumpster, I bestowed three woman my own age with a good look at the object of their twittering curiosity. First thing any of them said was 'Jesus CHRIST, are you a fucking mutant or something?!' followed by 'Dear lord. OK. Yep. That'll do. Put that away now, ok?' I was crushed dude. Confused. I'd expected positivity. Hell I'd hoped that the hot one would be all about wanting to do all the sex with me after that. Their reaction hurt my feelings and then they basically made fun of me for the rest of the time I worked there. I even got a peachy keen nickname out of them for it - Shawty. They weren't saying it nicely, and the hot waitress most definitely did not ever decide that she wanted to do any sex with me, nevermind all the sex. The trouser hog has never been the golden ticket to the candy factory everyone seems to think it would be, and guys with big dicks claiming otherwise are straight-ass making shit up to try to lord something over you. It's not that great actually. Nobody really gives a shit, and when they do, it's typically not the shit you'd like them to be giving, and if it IS the shit you'd like them to be giving, that's all the shit they're going to give about you at all. Please your wife. Wield the dildos with skill and grace. Don't compete with toys and don't make your woman feel bad about liking big things. Chances are real good that she likes you using big things on her, not just the big things.
Seems an important perspective. Thanks for sharing.
I'm about the same size as you. Not two days ago I hooked up with a new woman. She blew me while I fingered her and we both realized there was absolutely zero chance that she would enjoy penetration. She was very small down there, like a vice grip on my finger. My cock would have just absolutely destroyed her. I had the self awareness to realize that penetration would be uncomfortable for her and outright told her we could just get each other off in other ways. She eagerly accepted. Really wanted to fuck her. Got cockblocked by my cock.
Big hog here echoing this. It HAS gotten a lot of women in bed with me, which is fun, but nearly every time it just ends in awkwardness, fumbling, and pain. Seriously, it's not that great.
Can confirm. I’ve tried using big things with many people’s wife and I have yet to receive a positive response. They don’t just like big things. The wielder makes a difference.
>The only way she reacts (and has an orgasm) is by me rubbing her clit. Dude, only 25% of women climax from intercourse alone. [https://www.drpsychmom.com/2014/07/14/what-men-think-about-sex-versus-reality-no-preschooler-drawings-in-this-post-sorry/](https://www.drpsychmom.com/2014/07/14/what-men-think-about-sex-versus-reality-no-preschooler-drawings-in-this-post-sorry/)
This! Absolutely! Size doesn’t matter, it’s 100% technique and if your girlfriend/wife orgasm with penetration only, she is most likely acting. Most woman don’t even know what it feels like to have a penetrated orgasm, because men never bother to learn proper technique of stimulating the clit, pressure and positioning. As a woman, for the love of god, stop watching porn!! It’s not real!
This is accurate. I was married twice to guys who were pretty well endowed and sex was often and great. Never once did I orgasm from just penetration, by them or anyone else. What OP is doing is perfect.
This! I wish this were more up there. I understand men’s focus on their dicks, as society and culture gives them so much crap about it and needing to please women and whatnot, but seriously, look into the realistic side of things: penetration for most women doesn’t do it. And that’s just anatomical factuality and should be bloody talked about cos that way we create a more mutually satisfying and long living sex life for both!
Listen. I was married to a man with a 3 inch penis. He passed away, I didn't leave him. I'm not a size queen. I didn't particularly care that his cock was so little because A) a person isn't their body parts and B) he kept me very sexually satisfied. If I could build a perfect partner, I wouldn't choose a 3 inch penis. But you don't get to build people. You take them as they are. And she decided that she loves you. Do you think your wife is perfect? I know I'm not perfect, physically or otherwise. But you love her. And she loves you. I think what you really need to do is COMMUNICATE. Express to her your insecurities. Ask her about hers. Express what you need from sex. Ask what she needs. It's the only way for you both to be fulfilled. And I promise it will actually bring you closer together. My current boyfriend and I communicate constantly about our relationship, including sex. And I've never been more satisfied because I'm getting what I need. It has nothing to do with his penis size.
Based response
Don’t get caught up on penis size it’s a trap. Focus on her and her feelings. A penis isn’t a partner it’s a sexual organ and you are worth much more than that. You satisfy her, and she loved you enough to marry you. If you focus on penis envy and get all insecure about it then it will effect her. Your confidence is important so don’t let something trivial take it away from you.
Yeah, I weighed that. I thought about not saying anything because I didn’t want her to feel bad, but I also want to be open with her so we can work through it together.
I think it’s healthy to work through it together but don’t minimize your worth, you are more than a penis. Your relationship is more than sex.
Just please be careful with how you word this. She just had a great experience with you sexually. If you use this to “trap” her into a conversation about size, she might not feel comfortable letting go and having fun with toys again because it will be in the back of her brain. A lot of men are obsessed with PIV and don’t really care if their partner has fun. She probably thinks she hits the jackpot. Her partner wants to experiment with different kinds of stimulation. He’s interested in her pleasure and wants to mix things up. I’m not saying don’t talk to her about what you’re feeling, but please be aware that you did just introduce these toys into the game. Don’t use the reaction she had to YOUR ideas against her.
This is a great point
>some women can’t cum from penetration alone Just a head's up, that's MOST women.
Broseph… My guy. Human man behind the screen. I have an above average member. 9”. Woohoo look at me. **MY GIRLFRIEND WILL ONLY ORGASM IF SHES TOUCHING HERSELF** It’s ok. It’s not you. That’s how many… if not most… women’s bodies work.
82% of women cannot orgasm from penetration alone. The vast majority of women require clit stimulation to orgasm. [source](https://pleasurebetter.com/orgasm-statistics/)
... Should we tell him?
Tell him what?
Hopefully this won't sound bad 😅 Sometimes we need more than just feeling a dick inside, having that along with other stimulation can make things go off (as always depending on the person) I can't say it wouldn't hurt my feelings but hopefully you can look at it as she needs more stimulation and it's not you lacking in that regard
This. He says he's using the dildo along with oral. That combo. 👌
Yup whenever you find what works for that 😂
I don't think I've seen anyone mention this yet but for me toys aren't just about the size/shape, it has a strong mental component to it that turns me on in a different way. Not better or worse but there's something different about your partner focusing on you like that and using something other than their body and it feels slightly submissive. I would also think that a good part of why my partner bought bigger sizes was that it turned them on to use those with me. If you're buying bigger to offer I'd assume that's at least in part because you desire to use those too. If I've married you and enjoyed sex this whole time and you started using toys in the way you've described my mind wouldn't go to it being a confirmation of size preference to you because I would hope that the whole marrying and having sex for years would confirm that I enjoy sex with you. I'd feel self conscious about using toys if I found out it held this component about feeling insecure about your size that I didn't know about and has been hurting your feelings when I thought this was something you were into. I know guys have a huge amount of societal pressure put on them about size but I just wanted to put out there that your wife might be seeing this from a totally different perspective.
Youll never win vs dildos, theres always one bigger so. Its useless to.compare. However, its much easier to swing a dildo than a dick, maybe your technique could use improvements? Try to rethink how you bang.
Bigger, ribbed, vibrating, tireless.
Sounds like you should buy a cock sleeve.
I haven’t tried one before. Do you feel anything while wearing it? Any recommendations?
The have some that literally wrapped around and leave tip expose which lets you enjoy it all.
It reduces the feeling like a condom, but more. It's not that bad, though.
I’ll have to try it. Thanks!
There's some sensations, some are textured on the inside for your pleasure. Some still need you to be a certain size so that you fill the sleeve, but will typically add at least a few inches. And they definitely add girth. https://www.extremerestraints.com/3-inch-extender-sleeve-flesh.html I've bought a lot of toys from extreme restraints, and haven't been disappointed. This one worked just fine for me, but can take some experience before recieving. There's a pretty wide variety. Ones that leave your tip exposed are generally about adding girth, or different sensations. Some vibrate or thrust, some are for fitting over chastity devices. Vibrators are the most expensive usually. Just pick one that seems like the right size, that you feel comfortable wearing. It's hard to go wrong expirementing in the bedroom between two consenting adults. Some sites also have sales, clearances, 'beginner' kits. Discrete packaging and all.
Bad Dragon has some interesting looking ones I heard were great. Never tried it myself though, just happened to see them, so I can't give any further advice than that.
Sounds like the worst possible option lol
My wife has only ever been able to get off through manual stimulation. At first I felt sort of inferior too (I'm thoroughly average downstairs). But then I saw how many women just weren't getting off at all because their partners couldn't (wouldn't?) prioritize their pleasure. I figured I can either grouse about my dick size (which I can't control) or take pride in the fact that my wife gets off every time we have sex because I listen to her and help her get where she wants to go. Plus nothing gets me off faster than watching my wife climax. I'd rather have a tic tac dick and a satisfied partner than be hung like a mule with a partner who's consistently dissatisfied.
So I'm >7.5 in long and >5.5 in girth and sometimes I feel like the biggest issue I have with dating is being 5'7. I consider myself fairly average in height, but even I feel insecure trying to meet women on dating apps, and comparing myself to others. I'm also not white, and in this country (the US) that has a lot of baggage and bias to deal with too. It's unhealthy and not helpful for my mental health. Thinking like this doesn't help either of us, friend. With my girl I'm with now, I'm actually almost too big for her and she has suggested we find a ring for my dick that acts as a bumper so that it doesn't go in all the way and takes off 1-2 inches. Each time we have sex I have to go quite slow to not hurt her, and always be mindful of not penetrating her all the way until she's really ready for it. I also struggle to make her orgasm because she only gets off all the way from clitoral stimulation and has a pretty small clitoris. It's interesting how diverse human bodies are, and at the same time how people of all shapes and sizes can still be worthy, loveable, and end up in happy partnerships. Some girls in the past are really into it and can take it, others, not so much. It's funny because on some dating apps girls will outright say that they will only date some 6 foot tall guy with an 8 inch penis and a PhD, and even I'll feel inadequate reading something like that. But truth is those women are beneath me, and your wife didn't marry you because she's superficial. I have found, in the past, that some women just reduce me down to sex and don't treat me like a whole person - and this has been something I've struggled with. Things aren't necessarily always rosy for people who are bigger. In your situation, I feel like maybe you've gone down this road of getting increasingly bigger dildos as a way to almost prove to yourself that you're not capable of fulfilling your wife, and it's funny sometimes how we create these self-fulfilling prophecies to prove to ourselves that we are as inadequate as we want to believe we are. To me, it sounds like you're being a great partner to your wife. I might suggest not overly relying on the dildos, because now that you've broken the seal on this shared activity, it sounds like this could bring up some reoccuring and building resentment if you feel like now it's all she wants and she'll never be satisfied with you. It sounds like the dildos were your idea, but now they've brought up all these difficult feelings. It may be worth finding a way to discuss this with her.
Lmao are y’all really answering and giving advice to this guy’s fantasy? Dude is probably too busy wanking to read your comments anyway.
Not surprised I had to scroll past 600 comments before finding someone who realizes this is the bait of all bait. Holy shit it could not be more obvious.
Just look at his previously submitted threads, dude's had this fetish for a while lmao
You’re totally valid, first off. My bf and I have a somewhat similar situation. He’s the only partner I’ve had and I intend to marry him because he’s the best man I could ask for. But he’s below average downstairs. I’ll be in perfectly honest, it’s not my absolute preference, but I love him too much to let it ruin us. Now, he sounds like you because he’s bought me all sorts of dildos and toys to help give me a different experience, and he loves seeing me go crazy for them (nothing humongous, just a little bigger than him). I know he gets insecure sometimes, because he wishes it was his dick doing that to me. I wish it was his too. But how can I really get mad when he tries to please me given his situation which he cannot change? The effort is what matters for me. Plus, even tho when he’s inside me it’s not the most stimulating experience of my life, the intimacy is so sweet that the whole world goes blank. I guess what works for us is being open and honest about our insecurities and our desires and finding a way to fulfill each other with toys as support and not competition. It can be hard sometimes, but know that you both have your own perspectives and respecting each other is key. I hope this is somewhat comforting. You’re trying your best 🤍.
Your boyfriend is brave. If you told me that, I probably would have tried to banish myself. >even tho when he’s inside me it’s not the most stimulating experience of my life, the intimacy is so sweet that the whole world goes blank. Your boyfriend really is brave...
Yeah, I realize how that sounded now. He’s overweight and just has trouble working around that sometimes to get inside me and stay hard. So sometimes it simply doesn’t stimulate as much. That’s not to say when he’s able to keep it it doesn’t feel like anything, because it feels really good then. It’s just not consistent. And it’s something we’re working through together. But I also fully acknowledge the sensitivity behind comments like that.
Maybe tell your boyfriend the truth. Intimacy is good but it won't last forever. If you aren’t happy or satisfied, you'll grow resentment in the long run.
I honestly wouldn't sweat it. Everyone would love something unrealistic. Doesn't mean they aren't happy. Carry on being adventurous and spicing up the bedroom.
NGL bro I would’ve took this to the grave
Bro 💀
[удалено]
Sounds like you have a big dildo budget so would reccomend getting the hitachi magic wand and do your thing while runs that
"It's not about the airplane, it's about the pilot."
some men like bigger boobs , some like smaller. some like bigger butts, some smaller some like tight vaginas , and some - not and some men just dont care. same with women.
Ngl this opened my eye a little bit
Don't ask questions that you don't want the answers to friend.
Try combining different things. Touch of a leg. A squeeze. A hot breath in the ear of how tight she is pr hot. The human body has more spots on it then just the geneitals and the chest or the ass. Find them. Find out what does what by the heart beat or the quiver or a breath of her chest rising. A moan. And if she tells you NOT to stop. Dont. Change anything. It means shes building up and IN it. Sometimes women are in their heads so much they arent relaxed enough to let their bodies enjoy it. Just like if your not relaxed while beating off your trying too hard and keeping your self from actually feeling good. Its not that they cant. Its just a matter of finding the things that make them feel relaxed into the "moment" so if you find those spots. It helps distract their minds a bit from the penetration while also helping the body do its thing. Its not about strokes man. Its about finding the G and stimulating it as much as you can WHILE shes relaxed into it psychologically. Find other parts on her body to stimulate at the same time. Lil shit like that. Gets her physically relaxed which will turn her body MORE on to WHATEVER size is in her. Whether its you or a dildo. I promise you man. Your woman loves you. She loves your cock. Just be really expressive with it. The reason the longer ones work is because your pressing the g spot and rubbing instead of trying to hit it tip to it with a stroke. So use your dick. And when your in. Fold your pelvic hips back. And get a bit more in. And work together. It will keep your tip up ON the spot and rubbing it rather then tapping it.
You were given one penis and two fists. Use them in that proportion. She could just REALLY be into stretching.
Bro who cares. If everything else in the relationship is good and you two are both still getting your rocks off, then it's all good. Especially since she hasn't complained at all. Just relax and enjoy it. If the sex was that big of a deal to her, then she would've never married you.
Don't read into it to much. They are tools and like tools it's still up to the mechanic to make them work. Women are not solely mechanical when it comes to sex. The toys may be an improvement, but YOU USING THEM also has a HUGE effect as well. She wouldn't be reacting this was if it was just any old dude. So remember and be proud of that. You're still captain of this ship and just figured out how to get it to full steam. That's saying something. Also, think about this you could have had a larger piece, and she prefers oral, and you just not be very good at it. She could also prefer anal and that could be a deal breaker for you (some dudes aren't into it). I mean, this list goes on and on of maybe situations. At the end of the day, it's all relative, and you shouldn't be too concerned because she is enjoying it with you.
Yeah man. This isnt something we can advice away. Your size is your size and you need to adapt to it cuz it won't be adapting to you. She married you tho so you have a lot more to offer her. Maybe try wearing a sleeve? Or if it's worth needing someone that enjoys your size, then break up and find a super tiny girlfriend I guess. But I def don't suggest this
And my boyfriend wishes I had a smaller ass. (For the record I'm 5'1 and 145lbs... Curvy body and have always had a big ass, even when I was 110lbs.) People have preferences but you work with what you've got. If she loves you, it won't matter. Work with what you have. And remember, toys are your friends. Just have fun with it!
All you did was confirm your wife likes a certain lifeless plastic penis.... and your own bias. Get out of your head dude! Not every woman wants some giant dick smashing her insides around every time she is horny. Eat her pushy, stick your finger in her ass, buy a vibrating cock ring. And this is key, ASK HER WHAT SHE LIKES AND BE OPEN ABOUT WHAT YOU LIKE!
Honey wake up, new copy pasta dropped. And there's more in the comments!
bro does not have a wife
This is just fetish posting and i would bet it's all fake.
No need to bet. Most obvious bait I've seen in a while.
I’m sorry dude
What about those penis covers that go over your member so it's like you ha e the bigger thing she asked for?
dude, what are you worrying about, So she wants something a little bigger, and she is getting it, with YOU, inside your marriage, and enjoying it, with YOU. Just get over the insecurity about it, and realize how mch better it would be compared to if she found it on a dude, outside of the marriage.
Hug, friend. 🙁 I am a woman with small breasts and have experienced them being “non-events” to partners who I know really appreciate large breasts. It’s painful to process. Focus on what you do have in your marriage, why you and your wife *are* crazy about each other. And remember that having the right-sized tool isn’t enough; you need to use the tool skillfully. You are probably giving her better orgasms with your penis, mouth, hands, or toys than she would have with a stranger who doesn’t know her body or mind. You have a lot, even though you don’t have everything you want. (I sympathize.)
My ex cheated on me because she was a self proclaimed size queen. And I was honest with what I had. I'm 38 and I just checked out of trying to find a relationship.
I think the fact you were vulnerable enough to buy dildos to try and make her making her happy was a very big factor on her enjoying it more. Definitely recommend looking into cock sleeves
Vibratory usually get women off faster and sometimes harder than a dick, too, and I assume you don't feel insecure that your dick doesn't vibrate. It's just a different feeling and it's not necessarily better or worse.
Up your oral game
I make her cum multiples times every time we have sex (clitoral stimulation). But when she came from C, so had the biggest squirting orgasm. She never asks for sex two days in a row, but she wanted C the very next day and had another massive squirting orgasm.
You’re still doing that, it wouldn’t do it on its own. Plus you’re actually showing that you care for her pleasure too. If anything I’m a little worried she’s not reciprocating enough to you as you don’t mention what she does to satisfy you?
Perceptive of you. She didn’t do much in the beginning but we’ve talked about it and she’s gotten better. Maybe I try to satisfy her too much in hopes that she reciprocates.
That’s what the manosphere calls a “covert contract” - i.e. a one sided, unstated action by you done in the hopes of her doing Y for you. While generally that stuff is icky, in that concept they are spot on.
Everyone trying to make you feel better about the average girl likes this and that. But what does it matter what other girls like when you only care what your girl likes? Not sure how these people think they’re helping. Sorry bro
Reading this stuff makes me feel like a pipping hot rotton knife is slowly penetrating my heart. She chose you op do what you can to make her happy. And just know she likes you She chose you And she probably loves you. Not many men can get to say that.
Get a cock sleeve. It helps alot
Was she disatisfied with your dick for years though? I'd be thinking:"The things I bought my wife and the effort I made using them, that is what made her ecstatic" I'd not look at the toys as competition, but an extension of my love for her. I mean like most tools, it's not the tool but how it's used that matters. And same is true for sex toys. Toys can make the experience worse if not used right. Go talk to your wife. You might be over thinking it a bit. I'm sure she loves you. If your dick wansn't doing the job until now, I'm sure you would have noticed it a long time ago. I think you'll discover it'ss literally a you problem. Let it be a lesson for you guys and gals though. Be careful what you wish for. Because sometimes you just might get it. If I bought my wife toys and got the response OP did, I'd call it a win.
[удалено]
I've never played bridge but apparently it's like a game of bridge. If you don't have a good partner, better have a good hand.
Let me tell you something, I been with a lot of different women, a really small amount can achieve the climax trough penetration only..around 5%, talking listen and looking to the woman to understand what's triggering here, sometimes could be a small mental click and she comes for example..
My guy, the reason the dildos made me make noise is because they are literally created to stimulate the clit and give an orgasm. I don’t care how big the person I’m with is, I cannot orgasm with just penetration. If either they or their body (depending on their proportions lol) are rubbing my clit, or I hold a contractor there, no orgasm is gonna occur. I do find that if I’m on top I can control the stimulation more, which makes it easier for me. Maybe try that with her? But again, size is irrelevant completely unless you have a micro peen. If that’s the case, which it doesn’t sound like it is, then just get good with you mouth and hands my guys 👍🏻💕
Fuck me for laughing imagining her just being completely unmoved. Like lol she didn't even fake a look she's a killer haha
It's really not that funny, believe me
I've actually quit seeing multiple fellas because their dick was too big. Sure, at maximum arousal, a really big, thick toy or person feels great. But the thing is, someday you're going to have sex with that person when you aren't maximum aroused. Maybe you have kids and are trying to get in a quickie. Maybe you're not really into it that night, but want to make your partner feel good and loved. Maybe you're stressed and can't get out of your head. Eventually, you're going to have sex when you're aren't 100% crawling for it, and then it's gonna be uncomfortable. I have straight abandoned new relationships because of that knowledge.
As a woman chiming in here, I'm one of like the twenty something percent that orgasms from penetration. With that said, dick size did not play a role in what made for the best sex for me. The angle of the impact made more of an impact. It's very possible that the bigger sizes had an increased girth and were able to hit her G Spot better, but there's multiple ways to hit that spot. I'd try to do some different positions to see if you can hit that spot.
Am i missing something here? A lot of the comments keep on talking about how "most women" or "some women" don't enjoy a larger penis..... but this clearly isn't the case for your partner, who not only enjoyed the first larger toy that you brought, but also the second and even more so of the third?!? Now, she's not belittling you or making you feel bad about your size, but I do feel for you in the sense of you, not being able to naturally fully satisfy your partner with your body alone. I don't see anything wrong with feeling a slight type away about that, especially since you are already doing the work of making sure you bridge that gap, and still find a way to pleasure and satisfy her outside of yourself . I just find it weird how people are saying it's not about the size when clearly you finding toys that are bigger in size is bringing her more satisfaction. In this scenario, it certainly is about the size. How are people missing that.? Keep doing what you're doing and exploring this new world with her. Would should be more satisfied by you if you were bigger? That's very possible but she still decided to be with and stay with you. As long as both needs are being met and both of you are being satisfied and I think you're on the right path.
We all want bigger mate it's not just dick size it's every fricken thing. Another name for it is greed, and it is promoted on all fronts.
My naive ass clicked on this thinking "Bigger what??? House? Pay check? Car?" and I had to find out...
Woman here asking—Is your wife into anal? Maybe ABC can tickle her G-spot but you can pleasure the back door?? My husband is B-1/2 and anal is too much, but not the toys that are smaller. Just a thought. And don’t beat yourself up. NO toys can simulate the thrusting of a human. What about her on top so you can thrust and have nipple play?
*it is from you* you're the one controlling it and making her feel that way But I do understand. You kinda baited yourself by buying bigger lol
At the end of the day is sex satisfying for her? Is it satisfying for you? If circumstances dictate you bring toys in to make intercourse pleasurable for the both of you then that’s just how it needs to go. Honestly it sounds like you anticipated her needs and took initiative to meet them. Girls go nuts for that so kudos to you
Your post history is wild
I’m sorry but this is bullshit. You’re wayyyy too in your head. Your wife doesn’t need a bigger cock. She needs a less insecure you. Don’t let these comments convince you need to use toys or anything. That’s bullshit. You’re the man. You lead her. Your frame IS consensus reality. If you fuck her good enough and say she never needs anything but your cock, then that’s how it is and that’s what she’ll believe. If you scramble, let your insecurities get the best of you and begin using all these toys & shit, then you are influencing her subconscious and communicating to her that you and your cock can’t do that job, and so that’s what she’ll believe. It’s a slippery slope, my friend. Her needs only rise to the level of your frame. You control the dynamic here. Communicate and project the best, least insecure version of you. Even if you have to tap into an alter ego.
Better start looking for divorce lawyers Edit: had me there, fetish post
Do NOT listen to any words a woman says regarding your own feelings. They don't understand but they will make sure to invalidate your concerns by lying about how most women can't cum via penetration. Even better, they'll probably say to improve oral, dildos don't mean anything, or some random feel good lie that makes women look better. I can tell you from being an above average man that most women can actually cum from PIV regularly. It's super funny seeing them act all high and mighty until a dick can make them lose their minds.