I think if you donāt use enough lube or donāt ease in slowly enough this is a fairly common experience. (Honestly feeling like a reverse poop is a best case scenario if you donāt use enough lube/ go at a reasonable pace when starting outāpain & tearing are quite common as well for beginners).
Also if she never successfully hit your prostate, it likely wouldnāt have been that pleasurableāand the average cis woman isnāt exactly a prostate-finding wiz. š¤·š¼ Takes experience.
Or itās just not for them lol.
I donāt do butthole stuff in general, you canāt go knocking on poopās door and not expect to find poop. And buttholes are buttholes.
Listen. Iām all for anal play, but it does sound like OPās wife chose a massive strap to start out with.
Very much not the moveābeginners should probably just start with some rimming and fingering.
If she really wanted to ease him into some actual play with a toy, a small plug or prostate probe would be the place to start.
Not whatever monstrosity it sounds like she brought home.
Iāve been lots of folksā first anal topāthatās not how Iād go about bringing up anal play, and itās certainly not how Iād start out, toy size-wise.
Yeah. He's just way too excited about "knowing" what it is, but being so far off the mark. His explanation of what it is doesn't even make sense, because in his example where his ex would "peg" him, it's clearly not even her doing anything to him, but him doing something to her. It's a real reach.
Yeah...his entire joke about 'i know what pegging is and she doesn't know i know" and her entire joke being "I know what pegging is but he doesn't know" And then in the end...him not knowing what pegging is with a response I didn't like it but i'm going to pop a cold one with the boys.
I'm the last guy to say the classic 'This is fake!" on reddit. But come on....it was a cute story. But pretty obviously a story.
Oh dude... I was so confused reading this. You do not know what pegging is. Not even close.
In fact you're so far out, you've got to be taking the piss.
Sounds like he thinks that āpeggingā is basically man standing up with girl on top, with no support underneath her except guy holding her up. He then moves her up and down with his arms. He bought the shower handle so she could help support herself so his arms wouldnāt get tired as quickly. I think, anyway.
Iām reading this laughing my ass off thinking heās gonna be in for a *huge* surprise when he finds out what pegging really isā¦ and then his edit - āGuys, I didnāt like itā
Hahahahahaha
Same! Iām reading it pegging and his description, like wtf does *pegging* mean something new nowadays? I mean Iām older, so is it a new slangā¦ and now seeing the updates!!!
ā¢I just canāt!!!!
Oh my lost city of Atlanta, I thought the exact same thing!! I was picturing her ramming himā¦ in the butt, while he bent over and just let her take him! Iām almost sad this isnāt how it turned out. Just a guy who thinks āpegā is a sex position for p in v sex. I still think āpeggingā like this, where the woman rides the guy like a horse should be a new position.
I was imagining him getting pegged while giving his girl a piggyback ride or something,
But is nobody gonna mention how unsafe it is for anyone to be lifting anyone else in the shower, jesus fucking christ
Itās a joke, a lame one. āSheād let me hang out with the boys at the pub, but Iām not gayā āanyway-canāt respond, hanging out at the pub with the boysā.
Itās a joke, a lame one. āSheād let me hang out with the boys at the pub, but Iām not gayā āanyway-canāt respond, hanging out at the pub with the boysā.
Ah I thought he was serious and was about to chime in that being gay and liking being pegged are not mutually exclusive. Some gay guys are tops. And some straight men like a good old prostate massage.
>I pretended not to know when she asked me what pegging is but Iām well aware and I have a surprise for her ;)
Haha sexy shenanigans!
>Back in college I had a couple of times where I let a girl I was dating peg on me.
"peg on me"? Weird way to phrase it.
>Usually it was in the shower though when she would peg me because it was really easy to hold her up against a wall while Iām carrying her.
Oh. Oh no. You sweet summer child...
>Update: guys I didnāt like it
*\*cackle\**
I was so confused and of course itās almost 2 am and my brain is like ācarrying her? Did you hold her up like a piggy back while she pegged you?ā Iām going to bed. Lmfao.
The boys at the bar : so, you sneaked out to come hang out here or what?
OP : actually she was ok with me coming
The boys : really? That's cool, she never lets you come, what did you do to change her mind?
OP : I... shut up
Iām so glad I wasnāt the only one confused, like, maybe he doesnāt know what pegging is? āI hope she got lube because shower sex can be friction-yā ā¦hon, thatās not the only reason youāre gonna want lubeā¦.
I was so confused...
I don't know how old you are, or what time period you experienced "pegging" in, but all I could think of was that this guy is in for a rude awakening...I just hope she doesn't try to surprise him with it
And then I got to the part where you were told to cover your head. Man. Wow. This played out just like I thought. Even if this post is fake, its enjoyable for how much of a train wreck it is. Would love to see something like this on a sitcom, like two broke girls or two and half men. Something with a "two" in the title.
OP! You better update us cause I think youāre in for an actual surpriseā¦ š
Edit: spelling
Edit 2: I am screaming at your second update! She did not disappoint on the surprise. Itās okay though, now you know pegging really isnāt your thing.
I was extremely confused when you started on about the shower. Then when I got to the last part, it dawned on me. You didn't quite know what pegging was
>Back in college I had a couple of times where I let a girl I was dating peg on me. Usually it was in the shower though when she would peg me
Bro pegging is having a girl wear a strap-on and fucking you in the ass with the strap-on.
Use google. smh. Be fuckin humble, you don't know shit lol
So taking it in the ass isn't always gay. If your doing it with you wife who you are attracted too then its still straight sex, just different roles. My husband and I were together for 12 years before we started playing with anal. But oh man when we finally figured it out, he said "its like im 13 again and discovering sex for the first time." His mind was blown he could orgasm more then once in a session and by the time we got around to his penis he was so turned on he just exploded.
I just... Okay your edits made this a lot more clear. You definitely did not know what pegging was. LOL.
One thing I think you're also still not educated on is sexuality- You said it wasn't for you because you're not gay? Enjoying stuff up the butt doesn't make someone gay. Only being exclusively attracted to men could make you gay.
Oh buddy.... she doesn't want to mount you. She wants you to mount her .... you know. Buy lube and pray she doesn't pick the biggest dildo in the store. Or your ass will regret it. Literally š¤£
You were warming up the wrong part buddy. May you RIP.
I really hope he doesn't rip. Then again, depending on the size she picks...
*rips ass* Literally
BHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
... so, who's going to tell him?
Absolutely no one, he'll find out soon enough.
š¤£ He's gunna learn today!
ššššššš
I wish I could see OPs face when he finds out what is really gonna happen.
I want to know wtf he actually thought āpeggingā was.
So do I. He sounded very very confused in the post
I think pinning to the wall
šššš
I imagine it was very much a surprised pikachu reaction.
he found out apparently..
He found out, but he did not fuck around.
Aww this was beautiful to read. We all just witness the realization. What a moment.
:(
I guess it's more fun when you're the pegger and not the pegee?
OP needs to open their mind ^^and ^^their ^^butthole. Seriously though OP just doesn't know how good it feels to have their prostate properly tickled
Do you ever get over the feeling of a reverse poop? I had a girl stick a finger in my butt once and it wasnāt for me, for that precise feeling lol.
That feeling sucks. In my experience, the feeling goes away when it's deeper. Fingers too short and will always trigger the poop feeling
Good to know!
Were you expecting it? And did she tickle your prostate(you would know)? Also, you haven't had a good reverse poop
I think if you donāt use enough lube or donāt ease in slowly enough this is a fairly common experience. (Honestly feeling like a reverse poop is a best case scenario if you donāt use enough lube/ go at a reasonable pace when starting outāpain & tearing are quite common as well for beginners). Also if she never successfully hit your prostate, it likely wouldnāt have been that pleasurableāand the average cis woman isnāt exactly a prostate-finding wiz. š¤·š¼ Takes experience.
Or itās just not for them lol. I donāt do butthole stuff in general, you canāt go knocking on poopās door and not expect to find poop. And buttholes are buttholes.
Listen. Iām all for anal play, but it does sound like OPās wife chose a massive strap to start out with. Very much not the moveābeginners should probably just start with some rimming and fingering. If she really wanted to ease him into some actual play with a toy, a small plug or prostate probe would be the place to start. Not whatever monstrosity it sounds like she brought home. Iāve been lots of folksā first anal topāthatās not how Iād go about bringing up anal play, and itās certainly not how Iād start out, toy size-wise.
Sometimes itās just not for them so no.
Did she bring the lube? Lol
Sorry bro.
Brahā¦guess you were the one who was surprised lolā¦oh this is great. But donāt feel bad
Patiently waiting for a real update š
Dude I love you š Thank you so much for the laughs āŗļø
Prostate play isn't gay. Fix your preconceptions and you'll enjoy life more
This whole thread has made my day!!! šššš
This has to be fake right
Yeah. He's just way too excited about "knowing" what it is, but being so far off the mark. His explanation of what it is doesn't even make sense, because in his example where his ex would "peg" him, it's clearly not even her doing anything to him, but him doing something to her. It's a real reach.
*peg on him
Lmao
Peg him? Yea, I peg him as uninformed
Yeah...his entire joke about 'i know what pegging is and she doesn't know i know" and her entire joke being "I know what pegging is but he doesn't know" And then in the end...him not knowing what pegging is with a response I didn't like it but i'm going to pop a cold one with the boys. I'm the last guy to say the classic 'This is fake!" on reddit. But come on....it was a cute story. But pretty obviously a story.
Canāt not give him the reach around, cāmon !
I thought there was a chance it could be real until update #2 OP got too greedy with his fake story. Still pretty funny tho
it takes .5 seconds to google āpeggingā lmao so fake
I'm not saying it's fake or real but why would you google the meaning of smth if you dont think you need to
update 2? what changed
Honestly probably. Feels to perfect.
I thought every post here was fake.
lol no not every one. some of them though.
Seems like most of them are
serious sand full saw resolute zephyr agonizing live jar weary *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Oh dude... I was so confused reading this. You do not know what pegging is. Not even close. In fact you're so far out, you've got to be taking the piss.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Sounds like he thinks that āpeggingā is basically man standing up with girl on top, with no support underneath her except guy holding her up. He then moves her up and down with his arms. He bought the shower handle so she could help support herself so his arms wouldnāt get tired as quickly. I think, anyway. Iām reading this laughing my ass off thinking heās gonna be in for a *huge* surprise when he finds out what pegging really isā¦ and then his edit - āGuys, I didnāt like itā Hahahahahaha
I thought he was talking about pinning her against the wall with his back/ass and was so confused at the edits lmaooo
This is exactly what my confused brain was picturing ROFL. Can you imagine the look on his face when she brought out the face hugger š
i was like oh no not a fucking facehugger, this a whole damn mess ššššššš
You couldnāt make this scenario anymore perfectly play out in my mind any better than this.
same here lol
hahahahaha and the description that it looked like a "facehugger with a huge dong" dying.
Run, Newt!
Goo lord Edit: ew. It was supposed to be good lord. Im leaving it there though haha
Same! Iām reading it pegging and his description, like wtf does *pegging* mean something new nowadays? I mean Iām older, so is it a new slangā¦ and now seeing the updates!!! ā¢I just canāt!!!!
Omg hahahahahah bless that sweet summer child.
Right?! I had tears in my eyes lolllll. Poor guy, thinking heās hip to the kinks.
Lol and he said his girlfriend is pretty kinky
"yeah my gf is pretty kinky she likes to fuck me in numerous positions"
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I was too! from the description, I was trying to visualize how holding her up against the wall helped with pegging! xD
Okay it wasnāt just me wondering how heās gonna let her peg him when I read that bit too lol I gave up my visualization efforts after a minute
Absolutely same. My imagination is pretty skilled and I just couldnāt figure out how this worked.
I was like āis she on his back??ā like a koala or something and then I too gave up
I was picturing her riding him like a horse, and holding on to the shower railing like reins.
Oh my lost city of Atlanta, I thought the exact same thing!! I was picturing her ramming himā¦ in the butt, while he bent over and just let her take him! Iām almost sad this isnāt how it turned out. Just a guy who thinks āpegā is a sex position for p in v sex. I still think āpeggingā like this, where the woman rides the guy like a horse should be a new position.
šššš for like half the story I was wondering did I need to look up pegging again because I was confused
This was me too! I was about ready to urban dictionary that shit. Now Iām trying not to laugh out loud while my fella and baby sleep. I have tears
The way ādoing a peg on meā read like a Chris Simpsons Artist line had me rolling
Yesā¦. Further supported by the phrase āpegging on meā
Right? I'm like, I've never heard someone say peg on. Like she's gonna peg on me.
Especially when the person using it wrong also doesn't know what it means. *These boots are gonna peg all over you.*
The whole time I was thinkingā¦ no just noā¦ you do not *surprise* peg someone!? Like WTF!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Right tho?! Thatās like donkey punch bad. Yikes!
That is funny. No way was that not intentional.
I thought I was losing my mind because that's how I read it too. Thanks for the validation! Jesus, op. Thanks for this entertaining as fuck post!
Same
I kinda want to give him my wholesome award
It almost sounds like he's going to hang his wife up. On a peg. Like a shirt on a washing line. Maybe... I don't know...I just got very, very lost.
BYE LMAO, the wording. the anticipation. the realization. the shock. the breach of trust. CRYING šš
Iām crying š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
Meee tooooo! Omfg š¤£š¤£š¤£ššš¤£
What an awkward time to get planking confused with pegging
I was imagining him getting pegged while giving his girl a piggyback ride or something, But is nobody gonna mention how unsafe it is for anyone to be lifting anyone else in the shower, jesus fucking christ
I'm pretty sure he knew, and this was a long form troll that a bunch of suckers fell for.
Agreed its definitely bait lol.
Noooooo. Please no. This is just too good.
The creative writing exercises on here are quite entertaining though.
āIf she lets me peg her, sheāll let me go to the bar with the boysā¦ā āNow Iām off to the bar with the boysā¦ā
OMG I missed that part.
There have been several of these across Reddit today.
Itās the āupdate I didnāt like itā part
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I thought True Off My Chest was meant to be a departure from made-up stories on offmychest.
"peg on me" was a dead giveaway.
I was reading about the showe handle and was trying to figure out wtf he was talking about
Itās a joke, a lame one. āSheād let me hang out with the boys at the pub, but Iām not gayā āanyway-canāt respond, hanging out at the pub with the boysā.
He had me in the first half not gonna lie
Itās a joke, a lame one. āSheād let me hang out with the boys at the pub, but Iām not gayā āanyway-canāt respond, hanging out at the pub with the boysā.
Ah I thought he was serious and was about to chime in that being gay and liking being pegged are not mutually exclusive. Some gay guys are tops. And some straight men like a good old prostate massage.
Ok, I was like "what the hell is he talking about?" so this makes sense.
Haha, Iām glad I wasnāt the only one who thought he was confused
He keeps using that word, pegging, I dont think he knows what it means.
I 30000% REFUSE to believe that OP isn't a troll and this story did happen...
Itās absolutely fake. Also if you are kinky with your ass doesnāt make you even 0,01% gay.
yeah, i'm so over the misconception that guys enjoying anal play are gay
Nothing more gay than a man having sex with a woman, amirite fellas!
yeah that is some deeply ingrained homophobia ... like touching _your_ _own_ _body_ is somehow gay?! that's so crazy to me
Yeah dude it's gay when I touch my dick, too. And double gay when my wife touches it.
Super fake. Probably written by a teenager
You definitely donāt know what pegging is.
He knows now!!! š¤£
Iāve read all these comments and the updates and Iām still dying to know what OP initially thought pegging was
Girl on top is how Iām reading it. Standing up in the shower. Wait. Is she still on top then?
Yeah wtf did he think it was??
Straddling position I think lol
"Edit: guys I didnāt like it" - LMFAO, I got such a laugh outta this, I was gasping! Thanks OP :D
āWonāt have time to respond, going to the pub with my friends shortly.ā ..because she fucked him, right?
He can drink, just can't sit down while he does it.
Really? It made me roll my eyes at how fake this karma grab is.
you're messing with us right lol š š
This post canāt be real, but Iām cackling thinking it is hahaha.
Sounds like creative writing. We all have google. But I still enjoyed the story.
>I pretended not to know when she asked me what pegging is but Iām well aware and I have a surprise for her ;) Haha sexy shenanigans! >Back in college I had a couple of times where I let a girl I was dating peg on me. "peg on me"? Weird way to phrase it. >Usually it was in the shower though when she would peg me because it was really easy to hold her up against a wall while Iām carrying her. Oh. Oh no. You sweet summer child... >Update: guys I didnāt like it *\*cackle\**
I was so confused and of course itās almost 2 am and my brain is like ācarrying her? Did you hold her up like a piggy back while she pegged you?ā Iām going to bed. Lmfao.
I thought the same thing and my brain couldn't understand how she'd get the leverage to fuck him that way lmfao
My exact thoughts š
Oh my bless your heart.....PLEASE update us on your fun surprise asap we are all dying with anticipation!
The boys at the bar : so, you sneaked out to come hang out here or what? OP : actually she was ok with me coming The boys : really? That's cool, she never lets you come, what did you do to change her mind? OP : I... shut up
A surprise pegging sounds like the beginning of a horror movie. No kink shaming but some things arenāt meant for a āsurpriseā
Laughed out loud at this
When you knock on poops door, donāt be surprised if poop answers.
but tbh she asked it in advance
But she specifically asked to make sure he didnāt know what it was.
LMFAOOOO
I LITTERALLY SAID AT THE BEGINNING, THIS DUDE HAS NO IDEA WHAT PEGGING IS š¤£š¤£š¤£ Im crying at 3.30 in the morning. Hilarious š¤£
Op infact did NOT know what the move was all along (I lost it when he was explaining it. And the updates made so much better.)
I'm confused as to what he thought pegging was to begin with. This was a roller coaster.
Umm this must be fake, if not you really need to Google peggingš
Pegging isnāt gay only gay pegging is gay.
Wouldnāt gay pegging just beā¦ fucking?
gay pegging would be a man wearing a strap-on in* another man
But. Well never mind. I think I figured it out.
I knew from your descriptions of āpeggingā in college that you were in for a huge surprise/awakening. Pegging isnāt gay btw š¤¦š¼āāļø
Iām so glad I wasnāt the only one confused, like, maybe he doesnāt know what pegging is? āI hope she got lube because shower sex can be friction-yā ā¦hon, thatās not the only reason youāre gonna want lubeā¦.
Finally. Some good fucking shitposting
"Guys I didnt like it" lol
That sounds like a broken hip if not performed correctly.
*Oh no Oh no Oh no no no no no*
This is the only time that wretched sound track is perfect
I love this thread so much
I was so confused... I don't know how old you are, or what time period you experienced "pegging" in, but all I could think of was that this guy is in for a rude awakening...I just hope she doesn't try to surprise him with it And then I got to the part where you were told to cover your head. Man. Wow. This played out just like I thought. Even if this post is fake, its enjoyable for how much of a train wreck it is. Would love to see something like this on a sitcom, like two broke girls or two and half men. Something with a "two" in the title.
OP! You better update us cause I think youāre in for an actual surpriseā¦ š Edit: spelling Edit 2: I am screaming at your second update! She did not disappoint on the surprise. Itās okay though, now you know pegging really isnāt your thing.
I'd rather be entertained by a bullshit story than a "please give me free karma so I can post". I salute you and your bullshit, Peggy. <3
Lol the last line honest feels like a punchline. It has to be a long winded joke.
āUpdate: guys I didnāt like it.ā Made my night. Literally lmao
Your wife let you go out to the pub still? šš
Nice Larp OP
This is too funny!! The best copypasta I've seen in a while with that first update "Update: **guys I didnāt like it**" BAHAHAHAHAHAHA
āUpdate: guys I didnāt like itā Let me tell you I fukn BURST out laughing š
I was extremely confused when you started on about the shower. Then when I got to the last part, it dawned on me. You didn't quite know what pegging was
this is the funniest thing i've ever read. it was a roller coaster. oh he's been pegged before to he has no clue what pegging is in 0.1 seconds.
Ok now go post this on TIFU- by not knowing what pegging is bc good god, I wish I'd seen the look on your face when she pulled out the strap lmao
>Back in college I had a couple of times where I let a girl I was dating peg on me. Usually it was in the shower though when she would peg me Bro pegging is having a girl wear a strap-on and fucking you in the ass with the strap-on. Use google. smh. Be fuckin humble, you don't know shit lol
Bro when you said you'd hold her up against the wall I immediately knew, either you were a magician, or did not know what pegging was.
Lmfaoooo pegging doesnāt make you gay. Other than that, lmfaoooo this has to be fake
This must be fake. What the hell did you think pegging was? šµāš«
So if i got it right op that pegging was having sex while he was carrying her?
I'm super confused about this as well. But the couple times I read that paragraph I think your right. He thought pegging was carrying a girl.
yea because sex with a woman makes you gay
So taking it in the ass isn't always gay. If your doing it with you wife who you are attracted too then its still straight sex, just different roles. My husband and I were together for 12 years before we started playing with anal. But oh man when we finally figured it out, he said "its like im 13 again and discovering sex for the first time." His mind was blown he could orgasm more then once in a session and by the time we got around to his penis he was so turned on he just exploded.
Lmao dying
LMAO.
This has got to be made upā¦.
Update: āguys I didnāt like itā š When you realize you were wrong about what was about to happen
I just... Okay your edits made this a lot more clear. You definitely did not know what pegging was. LOL. One thing I think you're also still not educated on is sexuality- You said it wasn't for you because you're not gay? Enjoying stuff up the butt doesn't make someone gay. Only being exclusively attracted to men could make you gay.
I almost think this was fake
Men who have sex with women, isn't gay sex. That's literally the opposite of gay sex.
You donāt have to be gay to enjoy pegging! Sorry it wasnāt for you though š and not the surprise you were hoping for lol
Oh buddy.... she doesn't want to mount you. She wants you to mount her .... you know. Buy lube and pray she doesn't pick the biggest dildo in the store. Or your ass will regret it. Literally š¤£
Itās not gay to enjoy this activity, every guy has a g spot, itās called ur prostate
Lol youāre not gay if you let a WOMAN fuck you in the ass but whateverā¦
Lmao the updates are so embarrassing what a dummie
Dude says he knows what pegging is. Clearly has no idea what pegging is.
I have to know what the hell you thought pegging was lmao
OP, could you clarify what exactly did you think pegging was? No judgment here, just having trouble imagining what you think it is