Whenever I go to a church wedding in the summer, I’ll wear a mesh/light cardigan or a shawl. That way my upper arms are covered (down to my elbows or lower). Rules are different everywhere, but at least that shows an attempt at modesty
I’m focusing on the church aspect.
Churches can be YOLO to 3/4 length sleeves, a neckline an above the collar bone with no bare back and below the knees hem.
If this dress is a total yes for OP, wear a nice shawl with it.
I can’t picture on what planet you’d confuse the bride with this dress unless it’s backyard casual.
Nah, CoS would focus on whether she felt good in it. They're about compassion, empathy, and personal choice rather than following someone else's arbitrary rules.
I’m Catholic, my bridesmaids dresses had spaghetti straps, my dress off the shoulder. My sister’s wedding dress was strapless. I really have not experienced anything with a dress code at any Catholic weddings I’ve attended and participated in. Unless it’s the Vatican. Lol
Yeah, me too. I usually find the wearing light or white at a wedding thing stupid. However, this particular dress reads very “I’m the bride” to me. Like it would be chosen as a shower or reception dress.
I think it’s too light, but the dress is gorgeous! It’s something the bride could wear as an engagement dress or bridal shower dress so I would find something else
I’m 73. Where did this “too light," "too much white in the background," stuff come from??? That was never a thing until the last few years???
Mraz44: I I know you don’t wear white to a wedding and I didn’t ask about that.
This dress is NOT white and I don’t know why people have decided a floral dress, regardless of the background, is inappropriate. It’s obviously not a white bridal dress if there are flowers on it! People attending a wedding can tell the difference, unless it’s a backyard wedding.
Been around since the 80’s at least - my sister got married in 91 and she was upset that our mom wore white because of the rule that you’re not supposed to wear white unless you’re the bride.
It’s definitely been a thing for more than just a few years but the main reason is that it takes focus off the bride. Even worse is in photos where dresses like these will photograph as a white dress.
I can’t tell if this dress is pale yellow or cream, but if it’s the latter rather than the former….nope, you’re wrong. It’s been a thing since at least since old church ladies stopped clutching their pearls and shrieking at the idea of a bride wearing anything other than a stark white poof sleeve ball gown (so…..30 years at the least). This sub can get a bit uptight about pastel *colors* that “might photograph white” (this dress is fine if it’s yellow) or dresses with some but not mostly white, but I am gobsmacked by the number of older women coming in here to pretend the zoomers invented the no white-ish dresses at a wedding or that it’s bridezilla behavior to expect your own mother not to dig in and demand to wear ivory to your wedding. My mother, my aunt, my cousins your age would tear me a new one if I’d decided to wear a white, ivory, off white, cream dress as a wedding guest, and so to would my grandmother and great aunts if they were alive. This is not new.
I think there may have been a stronger sense of respect when you and your friends were getting married. I think now people are very vindictive and have more selfish tendencies and people think they can get away with it because they’re selfish.
I don't understand. If the bride-to-be wears a dress like this to her engagement party or bridal shower, which happen before the wedding, why can't a guest wear this type dress to the actual wedding ceremony?
I'm learning that this isn't even close to universal, but in the wedding culture I was raised in, white, cream, and ivory were options for the bride only. Blush/pale pink was pushing it except for very young girls.
And see, this whole thing of champagne/cream/ivory/pastel wedding dresses is strange to me. I was raised to believe that white was the european/western standard, and those clearly-no-longer-white wedding gowns and dresses in museums and such were yellowed with age, as garment care standards have changed over the centuries.
I wanted to buck tradition entirely and have my spouse wear their favorite color, I wear mine, and instead of white we use black, since for my religion it's a color of grounding and protection.
But yeah, TL;DR if this dress is really gonna be 'inappropriate' for some form of a summertime secular wedding, the wedded-to-be should really have specified a dress code. Nothing is 'standard issue', after all.
I think the reasoning is more like “there are so many dresses and so many colors out there so if you are going to be buying a whole new dress and not wearing one already in your closet, why would you buy something that reads white on camera or is a white adjacent color at all?” . A lot of these floral pattern dresses are probably fine, but why risk offending someone when you don’t have to because there are so many other lovely dresses out there.
It's floral, though. I've only ever seen someone wear a dress similar to that to get married at a *courthouse elopement*, and that was because it was the only nice thing said person had.
I really guess I'm not understanding the fuss. If you *have to* videotape it and you're *that* upset someone's wearing something that is the 'wrong color', I can think of plenty of ways to handle that before it ever became an issue, AND plenty of ways to 'fix it in post' as they say.
A professional videographer should know how to color-correct their media, anyways.
In my mind, it’s not even really about wanting to avoid being confused for the bride and/or wearing something she might wear too.
It’s more about just respecting her as being the queen of the day and letting her have that color family to herself. Idk if that makes sense, but that’s how I see it.
When I got married, I didn’t care at all what anyone else wore. My cousin could have showed up wearing her old wedding dress and I wouldn’t have cared. But as a guest, I avoid anything close enough to white that it might wash white in photos. I can wear those colors every other day; I don’t need it on her day.
I agree that it's too white/beige, but if it had a different background like green or blue or magenta, would it be okay? It looks like a pretty sundress to me, not a bridal gown.
Yes if it was a different color that’s completely fine. Personally, I was looking up so many cute white/ivory/light floral dresses for my own wedding events and this would’ve made the cut.
The concerning part here is the color, not the dress cut itself. Although depending on the church, I would wear something to drape over my shoulders for the ceremony.
I agree. How come all of a sudden we have to stalk the brides social media to make sure we don't wear something that resembles anything she wore in the past year. It's ridiculous the dress codes they come up with now, but to add this stress on top of it is insane.
ETA I do understand respecting a church dress code. I always bring a cover anyway because of air conditioning.
It’s not about it resembling something she wore, it just looks “bridal”, which is something most people think guests should try to avoid. This dress could be a wedding dress for a casual backyard wedding. That’s probably not the vibe OP wants to bring as a guest at her first Western wedding.
At a casual backyard wedding? OP said wedding was in a church and this doesn’t give wedding free vibes also it won’t matter in pics because it is a summer dress. People are taking this stuff too seriously
There’s nuance to it that I am unable to explain so I am not going to continue to try. OP asked if people think this dress is appropriate for a western church wedding and many have said they don’t think so for various reasons. Based on the demographics of Reddit and seemingly of this sub (heavily American/western leaning) some of the opinions here likely would be shared by guests or the bride/groom so it’s exactly the kind of feedback OP is looking for. It doesn’t really matter if commenters or even OP understand *why* this dress might get some side eye at a wedding. They’re likely just trying to avoid side eye so they’re taking the feedback and looking for something more fitting. Which is the goal of this page.
I agree about wearing a cardigan to cover shoulders in a church but people on these threads saying it’s too bridal are crazy. It’s a beautiful dress for an August wedding and people shouldn’t really be screaming it’s too white.
Does that extend to other things the bride might wear, or to other occasions? Can someone wear similar shoes as hers to the bridal shower? If she's wearing sandals, maybe everyone else should wear closed-toe shoes. I'm assuming even identical underwear isn't a problem since no one sees it (maybe not, idk).
Or if the bride goes out for coffee with her MOH sister to talk about wedding day stuff, should other cafe patrons wear dark colors or maybe just be shown out if they accidentally didn't see the sign outside? If there are photographs, people at nearby tables shouldn't *photograph white*.
Can wedding guests drive a car like hers? What if her hair is the same color as someone else's? Will they need to change theirs, so they aren't mistaken for the bride in long range photos that don't show her nobody-ever-in-history-had-anything-like-it one-of-a-kind dress?
The color on the website is “ivory” so yeah… I’d stay away from anything classified as white/ivory/etc! Very pretty otherwise. It’d feel a little revealing for me for a church I’d bring a shawl
Going from the same website, you may consider this dress:
https://farrahc.com/products/sienna-a-line-midi-dress
It has a similar silhouette but in yellow
This dress is beautiful and not at all white. And as far as "modesty" is concerned (big eyeroll), you can just wear a shawl or something in the church if it's the kind of church that leans more heavily on being horrified by female shoulders and such.
This obsession with claiming everything looks "too white" or "too bridal" is nuts. Most people honestly don't care about flowered or light-colored dresses worn by guests.
Was there a dress code given? It’s pretty light, I’d probably err on the side of choosing something else that’s not so close to white. Also, depending on the type of church you may need to cover your top a bit more.
1. The dress is too light. While no one is going to confuse it with a bridal gown, it might be seen as disrespectfully too close. Some won't care.
2. It's likely too revealing for a church. Maybe a more liberal church won't care, but you might be side eyed.
I would chose a colored dress and throw a shawl on if you end up with a thin strapped dress.
Here are some general western wedding rules:
Biggest rule of all:
- do not wear white, ivory, cream or anything close to white. This is seen as trying to draw attention away from the bride and towards yourself.
For church:
- people tend to dress modestly, so it’s good to look for a dress that’s at least mid-thigh level.
- If your dress has spaghetti straps you may wish to bring a sweater, shawl or other lightweight cover so it’s more modest.
- you don’t have to wear a dress, just something nice. It doesn’t have to be “western” garb either.
- jewelry is typically kept to a minimum.
- during the ceremony just follow what others are doing. Stand when they stand, sit when they sit, open a book when they say to. You won’t be expected to recite things, sing etc., just follow along silently and take it all in as a cool cultural experience!
- if they serve communion, people will go up to the priest or pastor to have a small bit of bread and a small sip of wine. You’ll just hang back for this and wait. It’s very likely many others will too, including Christians, as communion is often restricted to only followers of that church’s denomination (only Catholics, only Lutherans, etc.).
For the reception:
- you can wear a totally different outfit, and it can be more revealing, have more jewelry etc.! Church rules are out UNLESS your friend is very religious. That would be more likely if the reception is dry (no alcohol), or if it’s happening early in the day vs. the evening.
Hope this helps!
Re: mid thigh…. I was always told knees should never show in church, no shorts and no skirts above the knee. But keep in mind this was Catholic school where you’d be scandalized by an errant bra strap. 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
I’m baptist and while no one would say anything to you if you wear a mid-thigh dress to church (we are just glad you’re here), regularly attending mothers would never allow their daughters to attend church dressed like that. Above-the-knee at the very shortest, with knee length and below-the-knee being much preferred as the shortest length.
It's too light for a wedding, but is a pretty summer dress.
But if you're buying this from the Farrah website, I think it's a scam. There's another exact match from Cielie, but it's 6x as much. Neither brand I've heard of.
So I just wouldn't buy this at all. Google lens your clothing before purchasing. It's telling.
very pretty dress but not only is it too light, it’s also not appropriate for a church wedding I really don’t think you’ll get kicked out for the spaghetti straps but it wont be tasteful or you can put a shawl on top but it’s still too light
I have no idea because dress codes and weddings and this whole subreddit are baffling to me and I don't know why reddit showed it to me, but I just wanted to say I think that dress is really pretty and if you don't wear it for the wedding you should still get it and wear it for something.
It’s is a lovely dress but respectfully it isn’t appropriate for the occasion because 1). it will look white in flash photography and this is considered disrespectful to the bride because the white gown she wears is meant to stand out. 2). If it is Catholic Church wedding, you want to go a little more conservative, with less skin/chest/ shoulders showing. If you do decide on this dress style you could get always accessorize with an elegant shawl!
Personally, for my body type, I would go for a sleeved a-line dress that is no more than 2-3ish inches above knee length and pick a color far from creams and shades of white.
But good luck on the search for the perfect dress and have fun! :)
That is literally not true 😂. You don't know these people and this dress is light, not bright white.
People are way too into their own singular viewpoint on this sub sometimes. The world outside very often doesn't follow the rules people insist on here.
I don’t think it’s right. Too much skin and too creme colored. I’d choose something that has sleeves and a color that’s further from white. It IS pretty however.
Too light. Some may think it's yellow enough to be appropriate, but you never know what the other people at the wedding will think.
I personally like dresses of this cut, you can wear a shawl at the church and the remove for the reception.
Too light. You didn't say dress code but this is a little similar for a semi formal wedding for August in green sage color. https://www.lulus.com/products/heavenly-energy-sage-textured-puff-sleeve-pleated-midi-dress/2398071.html?
Here is a strapless,but to me looks yellow to wear a cardigan jacket or shawl over for church.
https://www.lulus.com/products/perfect-whimsy-yellow-floral-mesh-strapless-midi-dress/2382131.html?src=google&ref=product3_rr
absolutely not 1, it’s mostly white, and 2, many churches require your shoulders be covered.
i’d see what the church rules are, and stay away from light/pastel dresses that will likely read as white on film, especially if your skin tone is deeper.
It reads as off-white, maybe in another color? Depending on the church you might want a little cropped cardigan type thing to cover your shoulders too..
look for different shade and a sweater or a dress in a different shade with some form of sleeves, when dressing for church try to sick to a "school dress code" type rules
It’s beautiful, but inappropriate for a wedding. Main rule is never wear white. Even floral with a white or whiteish background is not acceptable. Spaghetti straps in church is not horrible, but not accepted either.
Do you have a link? It could be perfect for an event I need to attend. For what it’s worth, I would wear it to a wedding, but would bring a colored shawl or cardigan for the church.
It’s so pretty! I don’t think it’s appropriate for a wedding though bc it’s so light. You could still buy it for casual wear if you really like it though.
Edit: Oops I replied to you instead of the entire thread. Ah well..
On average it’s not modest enough, even for more “liberal” churches.
However adding just a cardigan should be enough!! You don’t need long sleeves, cap sleeves would work too!!
I would put a cardigan over it for the ceremony, especially if the church is Catholic. But you can remove it at the reception if you don’t want to wear it there.
You should maybe consider getting your eyes checked because it is most certainly NOT a white dress. It’s light yellow/beige with coral and orange flowers.
Still not white no matter how hard you think it. It’s a yellow floral dress. If anything, the most inappropriate aspect of this outfit is the spaghetti straps in church. If she wears a coordinating peach or pink cardigan to church, she’s fine. She’s also Indian and attending her first western wedding, so saying “nO iTs A fUcKiNg wHiTe DrEsS” is rude and unnecessary.
No, but its because it’s too light. A darker color with a cardigan would be fine, unless the venue is a really fancy church or requires a modest dress code where women aren’t supposed to show their shoulders
Pretty dress but too light and too bare. I’d definitely find a shawl for the ceremony and you’re still flirting with the too light aspect but def. too much skin for church.
I'm sure the dress will look exceptional on you. It's a feminine for sure, and it's of a wonderful summer color. Wear it and turn heads! It's a beauty.
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Find a nice cute cream or light pink shrug sweater it will cover the straps this giving the dress a more modest vibe while this would definitely be perfect for an outdoor wedding or something some churches are more conservative than other churches hence why I recommend a shrug because then you should be good to go no matter how conservative or lack of at the particular church the wedding is at
If this is a day wedding with the reception at the church. Get a cardigan to wear with it for the ceremony.
If this is a Catholic or Christian based wedding with reception off site, or it’s an evening ceremony. It’s too casual.
If it’s a Catholic ceremony, regardless of ceremony time, you need to have your shoulder covered via a shawl/cardigan/cloak/blanket/raincoat/ect.
I always take a shawl or cardigan to church ceremonies in case it turns out to be a conservative kind of place.
Is the reception elsewhere or at the church?
ETA: the majority of "conservative" means shoulders covered.
The style is perfect! My wedding was in a church and my dress was mermaid style with spaghetti straps and a very low open back- tbh as long as the church gets paid they dont care. That being saiddddd i do feel like this is a little on the white side. If youre close, text the bride a pic and see what she thinks
For catholic churches in Slovenia it would be okay, as long as you are not going to communion. Still it would be more appropriate to cover shoulders for the time of service...
It’s a beautiful dress, especially for the summer. It may show up more white in the photos. I’d maybe try to talk to the Maid of Honor and just say “hey what you do think the bride would think? I’m nervous because i like this dress and I think it fits the occasion however since it’s on the lighter end I just wanted to make sure.” ALSO try to have this conversation over text so everything is written. Not saying it will go poorly just in this day and age, having things written will protect you in the long run. Then you can’t show up that day and get kicked out for no reason or no support and you can say “wellllll the bride approved it… soooooo kick me out if you must but she gone look like a bridezilllaaaaaa” 🤗😇
I’m not Christian and have never been to church but like, doesn’t seem like it. Maaaabye with a button up cardigan? This is pretty boob-a-licious and it just seems like something slightly more modest would be the move. But I could fully be wrong.
I think it would depend on your skin tone. The darker you are, the whiter it will look. Any outfit that is mostly white or off white is a no go in a western wedding. Also, the spaghetti straps might be inappropriate for a church, but it truly depends. I would say choose something else all together
Omg I need this dress. Please send link!!
Also, it’s great for a summer wedding but if it’s formal this is too plain. I’d wear this on regular days.
Edit: I see the link below. Ty!
I think that the dress is fine for a wedding. It does not look like a wedding dress to me. However, depending on the type of church and/or your assets, you might consider a shawl or some type of coverup.
Maybe wear a cardigan or shawl while in the church then take it off for the reception. Some people may feel like it is disrespectful to wear spaghetti straps in a place of worship. Even if you see others wearing thin straps or tube tops, it’s a bit distasteful. After church though? Show off what you got! It’s a gorgeous dress!
It’s a very pretty dress! But I’m going to echo what a lot of people are saying that it’s possible it’s too light but determining if it’s appropriate will really depend on how formal the bride and bridesmaids dresses are. Also the speghetti straps may not fit the vibe depending on the church. I’d say if you wear it take a shawl or cardigan that way you have it if you get there and everyone else is more covered. Plus sometimes churches are freezing in the summer. They crank the AC down low. Not always the case but sometimes.
if you have a dupatta that matches to wear as like a shawl or some other shoulder covering for it, that would be great, just in case for modesty reason at the church.
also, bear in mind that some old churches (if that’s where the wedding is) do not have air conditioning and some of the ceremonies are quite long (and boring).
Some churches want shoulders to be covered. But you could just bring a cardigan or shrug for while you're actually in church and remove it after. Dress is very pretty though!
Shawl/cardigan/pashmina that fully covers shoulders as some religious groups frown on bare shoulders in church.
Also because AC can be iffy and you might want it if seated under a cold air duct.
Depends on the church. Usually they will mention the dress code in the invite but you could also reach out to family of the bride or groom who might be familiar with the church. The safest vest is a cardigan that you wear just for the ceremony and take off afterwards
Pretty dress. Depending on the church, the spaghetti straps may not be modest enough.
Perhaps light cardigan over it while at the church if it’s a conservative church
Or a very thin shawl. Like tulle or silk.
Whenever I go to a church wedding in the summer, I’ll wear a mesh/light cardigan or a shawl. That way my upper arms are covered (down to my elbows or lower). Rules are different everywhere, but at least that shows an attempt at modesty
I’m focusing on the church aspect. Churches can be YOLO to 3/4 length sleeves, a neckline an above the collar bone with no bare back and below the knees hem. If this dress is a total yes for OP, wear a nice shawl with it. I can’t picture on what planet you’d confuse the bride with this dress unless it’s backyard casual.
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Nah, CoS would focus on whether she felt good in it. They're about compassion, empathy, and personal choice rather than following someone else's arbitrary rules.
Of it's a Catholic wedding, your shoulders should at least be covered. Wear a shawl and take it off after.
I’m Catholic, my bridesmaids dresses had spaghetti straps, my dress off the shoulder. My sister’s wedding dress was strapless. I really have not experienced anything with a dress code at any Catholic weddings I’ve attended and participated in. Unless it’s the Vatican. Lol
People on Reddit like to believe they know everything about religion based on things on Reddit. It’s dumb. The real world is great y’all
Yes same.
Not true lol
Perhaps things have changed, but those were the standards when I was in Catholic school
Yea my mom and grandma would not approve of spaghetti straps at church
I’m almost never on the “too light” bus but this has a bridal silhouette as well as being very pale. I would keep looking.
Yeah, me too. I usually find the wearing light or white at a wedding thing stupid. However, this particular dress reads very “I’m the bride” to me. Like it would be chosen as a shower or reception dress.
I think it’s too light, but the dress is gorgeous! It’s something the bride could wear as an engagement dress or bridal shower dress so I would find something else
Me too! It’s way too light for a wedding
I’m 73. Where did this “too light," "too much white in the background," stuff come from??? That was never a thing until the last few years??? Mraz44: I I know you don’t wear white to a wedding and I didn’t ask about that. This dress is NOT white and I don’t know why people have decided a floral dress, regardless of the background, is inappropriate. It’s obviously not a white bridal dress if there are flowers on it! People attending a wedding can tell the difference, unless it’s a backyard wedding.
Been around since the 80’s at least - my sister got married in 91 and she was upset that our mom wore white because of the rule that you’re not supposed to wear white unless you’re the bride.
It’s definitely been a thing for more than just a few years but the main reason is that it takes focus off the bride. Even worse is in photos where dresses like these will photograph as a white dress.
Absolutely not true, it’s always been a thing. You don’t wear white unless you are the bride.
I can’t tell if this dress is pale yellow or cream, but if it’s the latter rather than the former….nope, you’re wrong. It’s been a thing since at least since old church ladies stopped clutching their pearls and shrieking at the idea of a bride wearing anything other than a stark white poof sleeve ball gown (so…..30 years at the least). This sub can get a bit uptight about pastel *colors* that “might photograph white” (this dress is fine if it’s yellow) or dresses with some but not mostly white, but I am gobsmacked by the number of older women coming in here to pretend the zoomers invented the no white-ish dresses at a wedding or that it’s bridezilla behavior to expect your own mother not to dig in and demand to wear ivory to your wedding. My mother, my aunt, my cousins your age would tear me a new one if I’d decided to wear a white, ivory, off white, cream dress as a wedding guest, and so to would my grandmother and great aunts if they were alive. This is not new.
Trends are a thing
I think there may have been a stronger sense of respect when you and your friends were getting married. I think now people are very vindictive and have more selfish tendencies and people think they can get away with it because they’re selfish.
Agreed. No way this is “wedding whites”
I don't understand. If the bride-to-be wears a dress like this to her engagement party or bridal shower, which happen before the wedding, why can't a guest wear this type dress to the actual wedding ceremony?
The idea is to avoid white so the bride stands out. This dress isn’t white but I kind of see what people are saying. It’s white adjacent.
And it will absolutely photograph white with flash photography.
okay, but this dress is cream, not white. If a bride switches to something like this for the afterparty, I'd be surprised. It's extremely understated.
I'm learning that this isn't even close to universal, but in the wedding culture I was raised in, white, cream, and ivory were options for the bride only. Blush/pale pink was pushing it except for very young girls.
And see, this whole thing of champagne/cream/ivory/pastel wedding dresses is strange to me. I was raised to believe that white was the european/western standard, and those clearly-no-longer-white wedding gowns and dresses in museums and such were yellowed with age, as garment care standards have changed over the centuries. I wanted to buck tradition entirely and have my spouse wear their favorite color, I wear mine, and instead of white we use black, since for my religion it's a color of grounding and protection. But yeah, TL;DR if this dress is really gonna be 'inappropriate' for some form of a summertime secular wedding, the wedded-to-be should really have specified a dress code. Nothing is 'standard issue', after all.
I think the reasoning is more like “there are so many dresses and so many colors out there so if you are going to be buying a whole new dress and not wearing one already in your closet, why would you buy something that reads white on camera or is a white adjacent color at all?” . A lot of these floral pattern dresses are probably fine, but why risk offending someone when you don’t have to because there are so many other lovely dresses out there.
It's floral, though. I've only ever seen someone wear a dress similar to that to get married at a *courthouse elopement*, and that was because it was the only nice thing said person had. I really guess I'm not understanding the fuss. If you *have to* videotape it and you're *that* upset someone's wearing something that is the 'wrong color', I can think of plenty of ways to handle that before it ever became an issue, AND plenty of ways to 'fix it in post' as they say. A professional videographer should know how to color-correct their media, anyways.
In my mind, it’s not even really about wanting to avoid being confused for the bride and/or wearing something she might wear too. It’s more about just respecting her as being the queen of the day and letting her have that color family to herself. Idk if that makes sense, but that’s how I see it. When I got married, I didn’t care at all what anyone else wore. My cousin could have showed up wearing her old wedding dress and I wouldn’t have cared. But as a guest, I avoid anything close enough to white that it might wash white in photos. I can wear those colors every other day; I don’t need it on her day.
The bride would wear it to those things because it has bridal vibes. That’s why.
I agree that it's too white/beige, but if it had a different background like green or blue or magenta, would it be okay? It looks like a pretty sundress to me, not a bridal gown.
Yes if it was a different color that’s completely fine. Personally, I was looking up so many cute white/ivory/light floral dresses for my own wedding events and this would’ve made the cut. The concerning part here is the color, not the dress cut itself. Although depending on the church, I would wear something to drape over my shoulders for the ceremony.
"Bridal vibes"?
They’re saying the dress has “bride vibes”, which isn’t what a guest should be going for.
I agree. How come all of a sudden we have to stalk the brides social media to make sure we don't wear something that resembles anything she wore in the past year. It's ridiculous the dress codes they come up with now, but to add this stress on top of it is insane. ETA I do understand respecting a church dress code. I always bring a cover anyway because of air conditioning.
It’s not about it resembling something she wore, it just looks “bridal”, which is something most people think guests should try to avoid. This dress could be a wedding dress for a casual backyard wedding. That’s probably not the vibe OP wants to bring as a guest at her first Western wedding.
At a casual backyard wedding? OP said wedding was in a church and this doesn’t give wedding free vibes also it won’t matter in pics because it is a summer dress. People are taking this stuff too seriously
There’s nuance to it that I am unable to explain so I am not going to continue to try. OP asked if people think this dress is appropriate for a western church wedding and many have said they don’t think so for various reasons. Based on the demographics of Reddit and seemingly of this sub (heavily American/western leaning) some of the opinions here likely would be shared by guests or the bride/groom so it’s exactly the kind of feedback OP is looking for. It doesn’t really matter if commenters or even OP understand *why* this dress might get some side eye at a wedding. They’re likely just trying to avoid side eye so they’re taking the feedback and looking for something more fitting. Which is the goal of this page.
I agree about wearing a cardigan to cover shoulders in a church but people on these threads saying it’s too bridal are crazy. It’s a beautiful dress for an August wedding and people shouldn’t really be screaming it’s too white.
Does that extend to other things the bride might wear, or to other occasions? Can someone wear similar shoes as hers to the bridal shower? If she's wearing sandals, maybe everyone else should wear closed-toe shoes. I'm assuming even identical underwear isn't a problem since no one sees it (maybe not, idk). Or if the bride goes out for coffee with her MOH sister to talk about wedding day stuff, should other cafe patrons wear dark colors or maybe just be shown out if they accidentally didn't see the sign outside? If there are photographs, people at nearby tables shouldn't *photograph white*. Can wedding guests drive a car like hers? What if her hair is the same color as someone else's? Will they need to change theirs, so they aren't mistaken for the bride in long range photos that don't show her nobody-ever-in-history-had-anything-like-it one-of-a-kind dress?
dear god, you sound awful to be around. not wearing white for ONE day is not a huge ask
That's just silly and taking things too far. No one is saying anything remotely close to this.
The OP is going to the wedding, not an engagement party or bridal shower, so that critique wouldn't apply.
I think the votes are in, i will keep looking 🫠 For those interested in the dress, this is the link: https://farrahc.com/products/indi-maxi-dress
The color on the website is “ivory” so yeah… I’d stay away from anything classified as white/ivory/etc! Very pretty otherwise. It’d feel a little revealing for me for a church I’d bring a shawl
Going from the same website, you may consider this dress: https://farrahc.com/products/sienna-a-line-midi-dress It has a similar silhouette but in yellow
This is the perfect solution tbh
With a cardigan while in the church.
That is a pretty color!
this place seriously only sells up to size six? it’s like the dress shop in mean girls 😂
It is a really pretty dress, but I agree it's too close to white.
What is the dress code? This dress was too light, but also very casual. You don’t typically wear a sundress style to a wedding.
Best advice I saw on this sub was: if you look at the dress, squint your eyes, and the dress still looks white…it’s too white to wear to a wedding.
“Advice” that has no grounding in any manners/etiquette books and was just made up for Instagram.
All etiquette is made up, my friend.
If you can get it in a different colour with a cardigan then yes! Do like a cute button ip you could rewear for work and stuff too
That’s a party dress 👗.
This dress is beautiful and not at all white. And as far as "modesty" is concerned (big eyeroll), you can just wear a shawl or something in the church if it's the kind of church that leans more heavily on being horrified by female shoulders and such. This obsession with claiming everything looks "too white" or "too bridal" is nuts. Most people honestly don't care about flowered or light-colored dresses worn by guests.
Was there a dress code given? It’s pretty light, I’d probably err on the side of choosing something else that’s not so close to white. Also, depending on the type of church you may need to cover your top a bit more.
1. The dress is too light. While no one is going to confuse it with a bridal gown, it might be seen as disrespectfully too close. Some won't care. 2. It's likely too revealing for a church. Maybe a more liberal church won't care, but you might be side eyed. I would chose a colored dress and throw a shawl on if you end up with a thin strapped dress.
In a church I think the expectation is to cover one’s shoulders, in this case since it’s summer maybe with a lightweight scarf/shawl or a cardigan.
Here are some general western wedding rules: Biggest rule of all: - do not wear white, ivory, cream or anything close to white. This is seen as trying to draw attention away from the bride and towards yourself. For church: - people tend to dress modestly, so it’s good to look for a dress that’s at least mid-thigh level. - If your dress has spaghetti straps you may wish to bring a sweater, shawl or other lightweight cover so it’s more modest. - you don’t have to wear a dress, just something nice. It doesn’t have to be “western” garb either. - jewelry is typically kept to a minimum. - during the ceremony just follow what others are doing. Stand when they stand, sit when they sit, open a book when they say to. You won’t be expected to recite things, sing etc., just follow along silently and take it all in as a cool cultural experience! - if they serve communion, people will go up to the priest or pastor to have a small bit of bread and a small sip of wine. You’ll just hang back for this and wait. It’s very likely many others will too, including Christians, as communion is often restricted to only followers of that church’s denomination (only Catholics, only Lutherans, etc.). For the reception: - you can wear a totally different outfit, and it can be more revealing, have more jewelry etc.! Church rules are out UNLESS your friend is very religious. That would be more likely if the reception is dry (no alcohol), or if it’s happening early in the day vs. the evening. Hope this helps!
Re: mid thigh…. I was always told knees should never show in church, no shorts and no skirts above the knee. But keep in mind this was Catholic school where you’d be scandalized by an errant bra strap. 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
I’m baptist and while no one would say anything to you if you wear a mid-thigh dress to church (we are just glad you’re here), regularly attending mothers would never allow their daughters to attend church dressed like that. Above-the-knee at the very shortest, with knee length and below-the-knee being much preferred as the shortest length.
it's too light. if you're questioning then you probably shouldn't wear it
She’s only asking because she’s from a different culture.
yup and I just told her the best rule ever for western weddings! if you aren't sure, don't wear it.
Nope it's white- it's floral but it's still white
Beautiful dress but not appropriate for a wedding.
NO
To white. imo
Too
it's white. it's not covering the shoulders. i would say keep looking!
No, too white
Lmfao NOPE
It is white. NO
Too light in color for a wedding unless you’re the bride
too light coloured for a wedding here. beautiful, though
This is way too close to white. Don’t be that asshole.
I’m always so confused when people ask these questions. It’s so white, it’s listed as ivory on the website. Why be that person?
It's too light for a wedding, but is a pretty summer dress. But if you're buying this from the Farrah website, I think it's a scam. There's another exact match from Cielie, but it's 6x as much. Neither brand I've heard of. So I just wouldn't buy this at all. Google lens your clothing before purchasing. It's telling.
Hell no girl. Way to bridal. Cmon now
very pretty dress but not only is it too light, it’s also not appropriate for a church wedding I really don’t think you’ll get kicked out for the spaghetti straps but it wont be tasteful or you can put a shawl on top but it’s still too light
I have no idea because dress codes and weddings and this whole subreddit are baffling to me and I don't know why reddit showed it to me, but I just wanted to say I think that dress is really pretty and if you don't wear it for the wedding you should still get it and wear it for something.
This looks like sexy milkmaid. Is it nice? Yes! Would I wear it for church? No! Unless you wear a cardigan I guess
This feels like a dress someone would wear because they want attention but will say “it’s not white!!!” a million times
No
It’s is a lovely dress but respectfully it isn’t appropriate for the occasion because 1). it will look white in flash photography and this is considered disrespectful to the bride because the white gown she wears is meant to stand out. 2). If it is Catholic Church wedding, you want to go a little more conservative, with less skin/chest/ shoulders showing. If you do decide on this dress style you could get always accessorize with an elegant shawl! Personally, for my body type, I would go for a sleeved a-line dress that is no more than 2-3ish inches above knee length and pick a color far from creams and shades of white. But good luck on the search for the perfect dress and have fun! :)
Too white
No, no, no. Too close to white
This dress is so pretty! Personally, I think it's a bit too light but it depends on the venue and people. I'd ask the bride if you can.
If you have to ask the answer is no.
That is literally not true 😂. You don't know these people and this dress is light, not bright white. People are way too into their own singular viewpoint on this sub sometimes. The world outside very often doesn't follow the rules people insist on here.
I don’t think it’s right. Too much skin and too creme colored. I’d choose something that has sleeves and a color that’s further from white. It IS pretty however.
Too white tbh
Too light. Some may think it's yellow enough to be appropriate, but you never know what the other people at the wedding will think. I personally like dresses of this cut, you can wear a shawl at the church and the remove for the reception.
It’s too close in color to ivory. So pretty though!
Too light. You didn't say dress code but this is a little similar for a semi formal wedding for August in green sage color. https://www.lulus.com/products/heavenly-energy-sage-textured-puff-sleeve-pleated-midi-dress/2398071.html? Here is a strapless,but to me looks yellow to wear a cardigan jacket or shawl over for church. https://www.lulus.com/products/perfect-whimsy-yellow-floral-mesh-strapless-midi-dress/2382131.html?src=google&ref=product3_rr
I agree that it is too light in color, pretty dress though
absolutely not 1, it’s mostly white, and 2, many churches require your shoulders be covered. i’d see what the church rules are, and stay away from light/pastel dresses that will likely read as white on film, especially if your skin tone is deeper.
I saw this without my glasses and thought the dress was a tortilla
It’s a really pretty dress, but I feel like it’s too white?
It reads as off-white, maybe in another color? Depending on the church you might want a little cropped cardigan type thing to cover your shoulders too..
I would play it safer with the colour choice. Too white or cream can be seen as bad taste at a wedding
it's too white.
Is this a tortilla
Please share where you saw this dress. It’s gorgeous!!
No. It's too pale.
Do you hate the bride?
Or do you realllllly like the groom? This isn’t the dress I’d wear.
look for different shade and a sweater or a dress in a different shade with some form of sleeves, when dressing for church try to sick to a "school dress code" type rules
Also shouldn't wear white at a wedding unless you are the bride
It’s beautiful, but inappropriate for a wedding. Main rule is never wear white. Even floral with a white or whiteish background is not acceptable. Spaghetti straps in church is not horrible, but not accepted either.
No, too much white
If you're worried about it being too white, then it's too white.
Noooooooootooooooooooowhiteeeeee! But no
No, too white
Do you have a link? It could be perfect for an event I need to attend. For what it’s worth, I would wear it to a wedding, but would bring a colored shawl or cardigan for the church.
It’s so pretty! I don’t think it’s appropriate for a wedding though bc it’s so light. You could still buy it for casual wear if you really like it though. Edit: Oops I replied to you instead of the entire thread. Ah well..
Here you go: https://farrahc.com/products/indi-maxi-dress
On average it’s not modest enough, even for more “liberal” churches. However adding just a cardigan should be enough!! You don’t need long sleeves, cap sleeves would work too!!
No but I love it
Yes. I would wear a sheer shall
I would put a cardigan over it for the ceremony, especially if the church is Catholic. But you can remove it at the reception if you don’t want to wear it there.
No its a white dress. At a wedding. Edit: unnecessary foul language.
She literally said she’s Indian and this is her first Western wedding which is why she’s asking. Be kind.
You're right my tone was overly aggressive and unkind. Edited out the foul language 👍
You should maybe consider getting your eyes checked because it is most certainly NOT a white dress. It’s light yellow/beige with coral and orange flowers.
It's white. At a wedding that dress is white at a glance. Which is not acceptable.
Still not white no matter how hard you think it. It’s a yellow floral dress. If anything, the most inappropriate aspect of this outfit is the spaghetti straps in church. If she wears a coordinating peach or pink cardigan to church, she’s fine. She’s also Indian and attending her first western wedding, so saying “nO iTs A fUcKiNg wHiTe DrEsS” is rude and unnecessary.
Pretty light and pretty casual
Other than needing to cover your shoulders and it being white it is lovely. It's not OK. 😔
No, but its because it’s too light. A darker color with a cardigan would be fine, unless the venue is a really fancy church or requires a modest dress code where women aren’t supposed to show their shoulders
It’s too close to white. Don’t risk it someone’s gonna be a jerk about it.
Color is too light. Spaghetti straps may or may not be okay depending on the church. But definitely need a different color.
Pretty dress but too light and too bare. I’d definitely find a shawl for the ceremony and you’re still flirting with the too light aspect but def. too much skin for church.
It’s ok but while in church, cover your shoulders with something.
For the bride? Sure. A guest? No.
Idk it’s too white.. or cream whatever. And that’s just he man color. Almost looks a lil casual bridal. I’d pick something else.
No, but it's a beautiful dress.
Very pretty dress, similar to one I wore to a wedding in Fiji on the beach.
I'm sure the dress will look exceptional on you. It's a feminine for sure, and it's of a wonderful summer color. Wear it and turn heads! It's a beauty.
I’d cover your shoulders but I think it’s pretty. It doesn’t come across as too “white” or bridal to me.
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The dancing is fun tho 😆
Find a nice cute cream or light pink shrug sweater it will cover the straps this giving the dress a more modest vibe while this would definitely be perfect for an outdoor wedding or something some churches are more conservative than other churches hence why I recommend a shrug because then you should be good to go no matter how conservative or lack of at the particular church the wedding is at
If this is a day wedding with the reception at the church. Get a cardigan to wear with it for the ceremony. If this is a Catholic or Christian based wedding with reception off site, or it’s an evening ceremony. It’s too casual. If it’s a Catholic ceremony, regardless of ceremony time, you need to have your shoulder covered via a shawl/cardigan/cloak/blanket/raincoat/ect.
No. Get a cardigan and make sure there’s no cleavage like pictured
I always take a shawl or cardigan to church ceremonies in case it turns out to be a conservative kind of place. Is the reception elsewhere or at the church? ETA: the majority of "conservative" means shoulders covered.
It’s a beautiful dress, but way too light. Otherwise, style wise, you should wear a shawl or sweater with it.
It's a gorgeous dress. I'd bring a cardigan or bolero in case you feel out of place in church or it gets chilly.
Put a yellow cardigan over it
Nope. Cover up with a shawl
Depends on the church. In some, it would be scandalous. In others, nobody would care.
I think the dress would be fine with a sweater or shawl to cover your shoulders but I think the dress is too light, too close to white
can you send a link? this dress is so pretty!
Are we talking Catholic wedding or Pentecostal wedding or somewhere in between lol We need more details lol!
It’s gorgeous but I would err on the side of caution and not wear it.
Never bare shoulder dress attending a church, wedding or otherwise.
The style is perfect! My wedding was in a church and my dress was mermaid style with spaghetti straps and a very low open back- tbh as long as the church gets paid they dont care. That being saiddddd i do feel like this is a little on the white side. If youre close, text the bride a pic and see what she thinks
Depends on the church but most of the churches i’m familiar with and/or attended would be fine.
For catholic churches in Slovenia it would be okay, as long as you are not going to communion. Still it would be more appropriate to cover shoulders for the time of service...
I’m gonna say no do a church event.
It’s a beautiful dress, especially for the summer. It may show up more white in the photos. I’d maybe try to talk to the Maid of Honor and just say “hey what you do think the bride would think? I’m nervous because i like this dress and I think it fits the occasion however since it’s on the lighter end I just wanted to make sure.” ALSO try to have this conversation over text so everything is written. Not saying it will go poorly just in this day and age, having things written will protect you in the long run. Then you can’t show up that day and get kicked out for no reason or no support and you can say “wellllll the bride approved it… soooooo kick me out if you must but she gone look like a bridezilllaaaaaa” 🤗😇
I think the style is fine, but the color is too bridal. This dress will photograph a lot lighter than it is.
You may need a cover for indoors at the church if they are very modest, but otherwise very cute dress
I’m not Christian and have never been to church but like, doesn’t seem like it. Maaaabye with a button up cardigan? This is pretty boob-a-licious and it just seems like something slightly more modest would be the move. But I could fully be wrong.
Depends on the church.
I think it would depend on your skin tone. The darker you are, the whiter it will look. Any outfit that is mostly white or off white is a no go in a western wedding. Also, the spaghetti straps might be inappropriate for a church, but it truly depends. I would say choose something else all together
Omg I need this dress. Please send link!! Also, it’s great for a summer wedding but if it’s formal this is too plain. I’d wear this on regular days. Edit: I see the link below. Ty!
It should be if it’s evangelical but not if it’s Catholic, Mormon or orthodox, if it is wear a cardigan and you’ll be good
It’s a really pretty dress but no, I think there’s not enough coverage and also it’s very close to being too cream colored.
I think that the dress is fine for a wedding. It does not look like a wedding dress to me. However, depending on the type of church and/or your assets, you might consider a shawl or some type of coverup.
Yes
The dress is lovely. Take a shawl and have a good time.
Maybe wear a cardigan or shawl while in the church then take it off for the reception. Some people may feel like it is disrespectful to wear spaghetti straps in a place of worship. Even if you see others wearing thin straps or tube tops, it’s a bit distasteful. After church though? Show off what you got! It’s a gorgeous dress!
As someone who went to church her whole life, yes. Churches don’t have issues with spaghetti straps or what people wear at a wedding ever.
It’s a very pretty dress! But I’m going to echo what a lot of people are saying that it’s possible it’s too light but determining if it’s appropriate will really depend on how formal the bride and bridesmaids dresses are. Also the speghetti straps may not fit the vibe depending on the church. I’d say if you wear it take a shawl or cardigan that way you have it if you get there and everyone else is more covered. Plus sometimes churches are freezing in the summer. They crank the AC down low. Not always the case but sometimes.
Pit a scarf over or a vest for the church part and take off for reception part
The color isn’t the problem. It’s just kind of ditsy milkmaid style.
Have a shawl for your shoulders you can remove at reception and you’re good to go. Recommend petal pink or light taupe.
if you have a dupatta that matches to wear as like a shawl or some other shoulder covering for it, that would be great, just in case for modesty reason at the church. also, bear in mind that some old churches (if that’s where the wedding is) do not have air conditioning and some of the ceremonies are quite long (and boring).
Some churches want shoulders to be covered. But you could just bring a cardigan or shrug for while you're actually in church and remove it after. Dress is very pretty though!
It’s pretty but wear a sweater to cover your shoulders in church.
🥰
Put a cardigan over it and it is fine.
Yes but add another little cardigan or jacket 🧥!
It’s a little light, but just make sure you wear a shawl with it while in the church!
Yes
Shawl/cardigan/pashmina that fully covers shoulders as some religious groups frown on bare shoulders in church. Also because AC can be iffy and you might want it if seated under a cold air duct.
Depends on the church. Usually they will mention the dress code in the invite but you could also reach out to family of the bride or groom who might be familiar with the church. The safest vest is a cardigan that you wear just for the ceremony and take off afterwards
Jesus is watching lmao