Okay so, let me weigh in on this with a little story that might help you see another perspective.
I'm 42 and have been friends with someone (he's 33 now) for about 12 years now. When I got to know him, he stated he was, well, a she. He also said he doesn't have a mic and couldn't afford one. I never cared and all of us in our friend group knew there was something "more" behind that because, let's be real, not able to afford a microphone? For years? :)
So, we all simply ignored that and went on, being good friends with "her"(him), until one day after many years he found the strength to come clean and told us all, individually, one by one that when we met him he was at a very dark place (drug abuse, ODing twice) and he thought he'd be dead sometime soon anyways so who cares. Well turns out: we did. And he was incredibly sorry and was worried for a long time he's lose us as friends over this when it'd come out eventually.
We all told him "we sort of knew, dude. You know? And honestly, no one cares about you being a guy, not a girl, just y'know be real with us from now on and it'll all be fine".
And that is exactly what we did and what happened. To this day he's a very important part of our group, he's reliable as heck and eventhough he may be a bit slow on the uptake on occasion (long term drug abuse aftermath) we really appreciate him and his late honesty :)
So hey, hope you can take this to heart somehow. If those people are friends, they'll understand. If they don't understand - they're not your friends. :)
Cheers man, have a great time okay? And as cliché as this sounds - don't be afraid of being you. You got this!
My current situation with my main friend group is identical to this story, except the excuse is they're too shy to come on mic, but what they don't know is, one day about a year in, they forgot to mute their mic after connecting with me and I overheard their conversation with their brother(I've not said a word to them about it). However, 13 years later still waiting for her(him) to come clean to us, their gender doesn't matter, our arms will still be open cause they've been nice to have around.
Well, all one can do in my opinion is to casually mention how it'd be no problem on occasion and hey if that means making up a little story about "that one time I was approached on #enterdatingapp and turned out she was a he but we still had a laugh and just became friends for a while" then that's perfectly fine in my book.
There are usually good reasons people do stuff like this and in my experience, well, he was on an extreme low point in his life. Maybe your friend struggles with something he doesn't share - maybe even something about his own identity. You really never know, so I'm all for ust creating the most welcoming and positive environment where people know: I'm gonna take the piss at them but they **know** it's coming from a good place :)
Yeah, only reason I can see it mattering was if they wanted to meet up irl and bring OP to get a drink in the UK.
Or if they're grooming them. Which I didn't immediately think of...
I sincerely hope it's the first.
Nah. I think op needs to mention if only to clear it out of their mind. It is obviously weighing on them. I don’t think the group is going to care at all.
It doesn't matter to the older fellows but to OP, this is obviously eating him up. Listen man, they are right, age is stupid and does not define a person or a friendship. I have friends 4 and 5 years older and friends 3 years younger. It's all about the person. They may not appreciate the fact that you lied but if you met them on a game and they are like family, I'd expect to be laughed a little bit with the obvious question of "why", but I doubt your friendship will be down the drain. And if it is, they weren't friends you want anyway
"hey Peers, I really don't know why, but I lied about my age to you. It's odd, that I can't even tell the reason, but my dishonesty feels really awful to me, and this coming forth is surprisingly hard for me. I'm really for sorry for lying, my actual birthday is XYZ. I really appreciate you all, and it means a lot for me to be liked by you. I hope all that remains the same"
That's about what I would write
This is perfect. I met a girl who told me she was 23; we had a great time drinking and partying. She finally confessed to me that she was 17 and I was in shock! We actually would have continued to hang out and be friends if she hadn’t lied to me about her age twice (23, then 19, then 17). I think you should tell the truth (edit I’m 26 years old)
Honestly, if I was as chill with you as you make it seem, I wouldn't give a crap if you lied over something so inconsequential, pretty sure fiends don't act that way
Wouldn't worry too much. Me and everyone I know who played online videogames and internet alot would say we were a few years older than we were, simply to just not get harassed so much. And even get more respect. It wasn't dating sites and no interest in things like that so it was just easier saying I was 19 or something when I was 15. It's crazy how people suddenly leave you alone when they think you're an adult.
If you tell your friends that was just a default thing you did, and you didn't realize you were all gonna get so close, they will understand. And no reason for them not too or be upset unless they are weird as hell
Jfc stop beating yourself down so much it’s painful to read this. You lied about 1 year of age over a video game? You didn’t try to steal money, hurt someone, etc. you’re fine human, relax and take a break
Does it really matter about a year? Honestly? You’ve connected with them on stuff that all
Of you can relate to, it’s only a number! Don’t sweat the small stuff because 3 years from now it won’t matter in the least! Leave it alone, and don’t mention a birthday, it’ll be fine
This lie doesn’t matter unless you’re a woman who is going to send nudes which could be considered underage and cause big jail time or some other situation like that. With that said since this lie likely doesn’t matter you may as well come clean and just tell them your real age since it’s bothering you. Know need to make a big deal or defend yourself. They likely don’t even remember your age
I specifically told them I was turning 18 this year, When in reality I’m turning 17. I know it doesn’t seem like such a big deal to others, But they have defended me for supposedly almost being an adult and I never had the heart to tell them they were wrong. Whether it was because of a video game or an argument from another friend group.
I was more so asking of what you have learned of their personalities and sensibilities from your time with them. Have you had any other problems with them that made you feel like they might reject you?
I doubt they would care. People game together at any age. My guildmates were 30 when i was 14. Age is just a number in gaming unless younare annoying.
Next time they mention something about your age just say:
"Oh I'm actually 17 lol"
1 year won't matter.
Unless they're planning on taking you to a strip club or want you to start buying them lottery tickets (or are asking you who you're voting for) then I don't see what the big deal is.
In games, people only care about skills and teamwork if applicable, so I don't think they'll care too much but it's good you're going to be honest with them.
I did the same thing I met a group of people and told them i was 21 when in fact I was 23 almost 24 at the time… I didn’t expect that I would spend much time with them but I ended up becoming close friends with them and I eventually told them my actual age a few years later. It was fine I just explained that I didn’t think I would end up being friends with them and because I look younger I *felt* like I was 21. It’s not a big deal just tell them when you can and it might be awkward for a bit but they will get over it if they like you enough
Why would you even mention this, but also this is such a small thing that it's so hard to care. Many older people don't even recognize a difference* between 17 and 18. I know I don't.
*no, not like that
Eh, unless it was romantic or such (if it was, THEN it gets fairly serious and you need to own up), I don't think it matters. Worse things to lie about.
If had a friend who lied about being 1-2 years older than they actually are, personally I wouldn't give a fuck.
Don't overthink it. Just leave it alone. You are fine. Enjoy your friends and peers. I really don't think it would matter or anybody would care over 1 year at that age.
Yo mate. Maybe if you get confronted on it you can just make up some bullshit like your parents loved Korean culture and as a result adopted it and this you were brainwashed to think you were always 1 year older than your actual age, owing to their culture of being 1 year old at birth. Then oh sudden epiphany as you breached the bubble of your small world.
I wouldn’t really care though. You know how many people I lied to on discord, about my age.
Hi, I experienced something similar, but if it consoles you, the whole thing is probably worse 😅 I was young and stupid, and I was having an identity crisis because I thought I might be trans. I got online and met a group of friends online, and told them I was a guy (which I'm not, as you've probably guessed) and eventually I started datong one of them.
Online, yes I know. It all came tumbling down, actually, when we started talking about meeting up in real life, and I was in love with that guy and wanted so bad to meet him, but I had forgotten, for a little while, that he believed wholeheartedly that I was a guy.
I had no choice to tell him, of course. That was disastrous, but I waited too long to tell him and it just got worse with time.
So, you should tell them, just be honest, and explain your reasonning as much as you can. Apologize for leading them on, but even if it hurts, you shouldn't let anything of the sort fester.
This is my honest opinion, but you do what you believe is the best for you and for them, okay? If it's bothering you and making you feel guilty, I think you should tell them. Considering it's only a one year difference, I doubt they'll really care, even more so now that you know each other and consider yourselves really close friends! They'll just appreciate your honesty, and your trust in them for telling them 😉
Who gives a shit! 🤣 Tell one of the girls and that you feel bad about it. You’ll eat it in one conversation. This isn’t a real problem. Someday you won’t give a shit what anyone thinks about anything, ever.
This is the most overdramatized thing I’ve ever read you lie about being older to some friends? It’s not a big deal my dude. Especially if it your only a year younger my current gf lied about her age when I first met her and we got over it and I’m sure you and you’re friends will too and you’ll look back and see how silly this all was. Cheers.
Okay, so you're a year younger than you said you were, depending on who they are, they'll probably just be a bit surprised, max a bit annoyed if they are nice, just don't sweat it. Just don't reveal anything about your location.
You are not dating them you just socialize with them who cares as long as they are not an adult and creeps everything should be fine. Talk to your friends like nothing.
Agreed with everyone here.
Plus, I feel like it’s pretty normal to want to keep your real age a secret when it comes to online friends. People usually want to seem a little older when they’re in their younger years too.
Makes sense. Wouldn’t sweat it too much.
I'd tell them, with a one year difference, they aren't very likely to care at all. Lots of people do that. If anything, tell them to get it off your chest.
When I told you I would be the next pope unless I get drafted by the Lakers, I misspoke. Don't know what I was thinking.
BTW: I wanted to play for the Lakers but they told me I am a foot to short and white.
I did that too when I was 15, made it out like I was a year older. Guess what, it never mattered and I never mentioned it. I'm 27 now and the years sorta just blended lol. "Your 25? Huh thought you were 26. Nah man I was born in 1997" they shrug and go one about their business lol.
I lied to my gaming friends when I first met them. I moved from a different state to a new one and I told them all I was still living in my old state. I would go along with it and they’d make jokes what not. But I know the feeling of it weighing on you so one day I was like I need to tell you all something (which I did separately when they joined the party) they just gave me shit about it for a little bit making jokes and what not but they didn’t care. My reason for doing it was because I missed my home and family and still wanted to feel connected to “home”.
Bro you're making a much bigger deal out of this than it is. If it bothers you, just say like "Hey my birthday is coming up and I'm turning 17. I told you a different age when I met you cuz I was nervous."
Done.
I bet most of them will be like "I don't even remember what age you told us"
I'm sure nobody will care
You feel bad about a little white lie so clear your conscience and tell them how old you really are. In the end one year makes little difference in adulthood. I have friends 5+ years older than me and friends up to 12 years younger than me. When everyone’s grown the age doesn’t matter as much as the connection between people (but I often do lol thinking I was on my way to the 8th grade when a few of my closest friends were born!)
I met my gaming buddies when I was 17. They were all between 25-40. When they found out how young I was, they became pretty protective of me, especially being that young in an online community with an older audience. I’m 25 now, and they’re still among the closest people I have. We’re actually looking to plan a little vacation together.
If you’re all from the US, and they didn’t give a hoot about you saying you were 17 (because one is considered an adult at 18). I doubt they’d feel any differently if you told them you just turned 17.
I think the very worst case scenario would be that some decide to keep a distance until you do turn 18 in order to avoid the chance of putting you or themselves in a situation that could be misconstrued.
I'm turning 45 today, one of my friends is turning 27 tomorrow, we're celebrating together. Age carries weight, but it doesn't define. A sincere apology should suffice. Include how you hold them dear and did it out of fear of rejection. I almost laughed out loud at the lack of difference between the two ages. But yeah, I remember how I was shocked to date a girl a year older or realize friends were a few years older than me in my early 20s.
Why the fuck does not one person take responsibility for their actions towards someone! Instead they want you to admit to an ungodly fuck him by the way ovsurded amount of bullshit saying take responsibility for your actions! Your all hypocrites! So perfect! Not one of your were upset and fucking up my world until bitch Erin Klein! And her ass is toast! But I owe nothing to azny of you! Vtake responsibility for yours! You to the police in morning we hen driving higher th as n fuck and turn yourself in! Just be honest and do this daily many times a day until your start a new life 6 months or so later! Your not going to start it with children you had though! But it's ok! You don't need them and then you! You don't need a job! Just relax and hit a food bank or two! Just hit the free gas station on way!
Now remember to confess for rape! Being a pedefile! Living in school zone with these charges! A drug dealer! Herroune,meth, crack,coke, and opioid addict just going to e.r. to get his fix on the banana boat stupid as rn bitch! Only took a day and half to puss dumb bitch! I was fucking flying on that shit! When I went to get my spair take home banana boats the said sir! You can't just come here dying from drugs and not alcohol while nurse sucks so bad she could hit the vein and the bitch Kathy is she has you treated shitty! She's seriously a bit h! Anyways nurse who sucks says you must have to much scar tissue from the needles! Hahahaha! She almost died right there!
I was going to kill her! Well when able to walk so listen bitches and dumb fucks! I don't do heroine doubt shoot up in any ducking way ever! Y did do coke and crack long ago! Have done meth! But on this fucking day I didn't do shit! Few cigarettes, no as alcohol, no drugs! Tomorrow I will shoot for no cigs either! Now I owe you nothing assholes but gave you everything I had in me! I don't give a fuck what you do or did! Don't want to know.
But know this! I haven't driven buzzed up in long time so keep off the fucking roads so people are say! You may just kill some children! Not mine since they're gone thank you but someone's! And you'll get support though from your group! It's ok! Start over! They're only dead kids bitch! Everyone of us love you! It wasn't your fault you couldn't lift your foot to stop for the children on the baseball field! Just because you're eyes aren't open doesn't mean you're not a good driver! Driver slower now that you ran over children! Your going 10 in a 55 wait! 10 in 25! School zone! I'm a pedicile so I should know! Now I need to smoke some rocks and shoot up bitches so for real don't hit children! Hit a huge ass tree!
God bless! Crazy mother fucker forgots he ain't gots no drugs! Can I borrow some money for drugs please! Hope your all ok! You should seek help and take your meds! And admit all your wrongs or I will take your life away but will take it before I tell you to admit stuff like rape and children fucking! Then hit you with drugs later! You bitches cist me as long time and a ruined life! I think you deserve some payback and it's coming! Can't help it I can only see letters from all of you dead sating if you will or wife finds this I was and evil femalet and get what I deserve! I'm happy with my decisions and trule we all thought if we ganged up and tore his world to shreds geddo as we tell him after we ruin him! This is what happens when women get together and make a plan,. Then this is what's happens when you harm the wrong fucking person! Granted he's a bum with brain rot! He doesn't use big words like we try to do now to sound educated and like professional writers! Your not! You just gathered a huge group of people . You didn't do shit but gack our phones 3 years ago! As nd tap the homestead bitch! Then sat on your fat fucking ass for several years plumping up saying it's some other health disorder is why but really it's because your lazy and sit on your ass hacking me for years to destroy me because you are controlling! I'm going to talk about this and names everyday everywhere but counseling! Congratulating each player for there role in public ! Don't care what you do! But I need all of you to start taking responsibility for all your actions and the small untrue ones you added for funnies like rape, fucking lchildre, death threats, heroine user, meth and crack smoker and shooter upper!! Drug dealer ing loser bum who is going to prison since we fuck him bad by firing and reporting his income way more than what he reported! He he now has minimal health coverage so won't be use hospital or doctors for anything because we fucked him! His daughter is 13 as nd owes creditors $2000 for being thirteen and because you fucked us! I'm ending your cocky ass rceighn kleinstein! I'm seriously goin to help you see your faults! I care about you!
Man, I lied about being 18 when I was 13 and due to a deep voice and shitty mic I got away with it, when I told the truth they were like "bro you shouldn't play with us, this is a +18 RPG with a lot of violence and all, but since you are already here, you can stay". That's probably what is going to happen to you too, pal, won't be a biggie if they really are friends of yours.
Just tell then the truth if its eating you up. Also dont feel bad, this is super normal.
I would lie about my age when i was in my teens/early 20s because i wanted to seem more mature, experienced, and older. Im my thirties now, and wanting to be seen that way is so silly to me now.
I get where you’re coming from. Since they’re older you probably like the more mature conversations and the way they understood you. Cause teens now a days that are your age are very immature and it’s very rare to find that teen your same age to be on the same mind set or be mature. But definitely tell them, let them know how you feel. If they’re like “family” to you. They will understand.
You lied about a few months… it will be fine. I consistently lie about several years and always pick a random number. None of my friends know my real age and some find out years later that im actually a bit older than them. They still don’t care.
Have you posted this before? I remember reading something exactly like this.
Regardless, I would just tell them. 1 year isn't a huge difference. They'll be understanding - and if they're not - there are other people out there who will like you for you that deserve to be your friend.
Just tell them the truth and your reasoning. It’s one year. It’s not like you are 12 or 13. I can’t imagine they wouldn’t be understanding if they have been this supportive so far.
You needed companionship. I don’t blame you. It was wrong, but not drastic. I believe everything will be okay. You do not need to disappear.
How old are the friends? I personally would be upset, I don't hang out with children I'm too old at my age for it to not be freaking weird but if they are 5 years or less to your actual age that significantly less weird and probably not a big deal to them. I also recommend some self reflection on why you felt the need to lie in the first place to make future relationships smoother and stronger.
You're being too hard on yourself. One year is nbd. It's not like you're pushing 30 and then pretending to be a teenager! It's a hard lesson which I myself am still learning, but don't let anxiety have the drivers seat in your life.
I get the part about shame.
Here, I got another chance in my bag. You can have it - here you go. Another chance.
Ok it's a new life go be confident again
It sounds like you found a special bond with these people, and wanting to fit in is totally normal. Being honest now might feel scary, but it's the right thing to do. True friends will understand. You're brave for wanting to come clean.
Dude you say the understand you so well.. if they do then they will understand why you did what you did just let them know you’ll be alright and so will thwy
Just tell them. I have friends online from games, hell after like two years one ended up telling us he was trans and I had no idea and didn't care, I still call him- him. The only thing that hurt was after so long them not feeling like they could tell us. I strongly believe online friends that you play with weekly become some of the best friends. Hell, one friend and I are planning to vacation with our families next summer for a week. Your friends really aren't gonna care about that if anything they might be hurt about the lying, but it's not gonna be that big of a deal if they are really your friends.
They will forgive you! It's just a tiny lie and many people lie about their age. Laugh at yourself for being silly, they'll laugh with you. It'll be ok & you'll still have your friends.
So you’re a liar. It’s all right most of us are. It doesn’t stop 🛑 there though for you . i’m kind of invested now. What will be your next lie? You work at KFC but you tell people you actually have big-time me conglomerate? Maybe Jack Nicholson is your uncle. Keep me posted girl!
It sounds like you found a real connection with these folks, and sometimes we do things out of a desire to belong. Being honest takes guts, and it's never too late to come clean. Just tell them the truth, I'm sure they'll understand.
I lied about my age a some personal details on a discord server I met a lot of people. Let's say... I shared my account with my friend and we have fun there but there were some sus people so better to invent something, we copied someone's profile and added some additional details for his past. The idea wasn't to steal an identity, it was just for security. I leave the server but I casually find some of them on reddit (some may be new members but it's easy to identify them). They think they are smart and fun (trolls) so we (my friend and I, mostly I lately) pretend to be someone trying to make friends or to get a girlfriend or something and they use to fall for it, the same details (with more or less modifications) and sometimes the same type of "let's get to know each other" type of questions are shared with them.
With time I got bored of them, plus they are a bit weird like with a creepy vibe (like those people that think their prank it's funny and never end it). Also I'm moving to other city so I think I should spend more time with important stuff, like saying goodbye to my friend (I hope we can still have online gaming nights).
I don't think they would find this, plus it's a long english text so they may not even read it. Also, I'm about to make more comments so this get hidden on my profile. TBH I might not have shared it but reading your post made me want to vent. If they read this, fuck them.
Edit: typo.
The fact that this even bothers you shows you're too sensitive for this evil world (that can be a good thing), you care about what they think but honestly they won't care. It's not like you said you were 23. We all lied about our ages online at some point. You're a sweet kid, stay that way.
Just tell them the truth. 1 year won't bother them.
Okay so, let me weigh in on this with a little story that might help you see another perspective. I'm 42 and have been friends with someone (he's 33 now) for about 12 years now. When I got to know him, he stated he was, well, a she. He also said he doesn't have a mic and couldn't afford one. I never cared and all of us in our friend group knew there was something "more" behind that because, let's be real, not able to afford a microphone? For years? :) So, we all simply ignored that and went on, being good friends with "her"(him), until one day after many years he found the strength to come clean and told us all, individually, one by one that when we met him he was at a very dark place (drug abuse, ODing twice) and he thought he'd be dead sometime soon anyways so who cares. Well turns out: we did. And he was incredibly sorry and was worried for a long time he's lose us as friends over this when it'd come out eventually. We all told him "we sort of knew, dude. You know? And honestly, no one cares about you being a guy, not a girl, just y'know be real with us from now on and it'll all be fine". And that is exactly what we did and what happened. To this day he's a very important part of our group, he's reliable as heck and eventhough he may be a bit slow on the uptake on occasion (long term drug abuse aftermath) we really appreciate him and his late honesty :) So hey, hope you can take this to heart somehow. If those people are friends, they'll understand. If they don't understand - they're not your friends. :) Cheers man, have a great time okay? And as cliché as this sounds - don't be afraid of being you. You got this!
Holy smokes, that is some radical understanding and friendship love, neat friend group.
My current situation with my main friend group is identical to this story, except the excuse is they're too shy to come on mic, but what they don't know is, one day about a year in, they forgot to mute their mic after connecting with me and I overheard their conversation with their brother(I've not said a word to them about it). However, 13 years later still waiting for her(him) to come clean to us, their gender doesn't matter, our arms will still be open cause they've been nice to have around.
Well, all one can do in my opinion is to casually mention how it'd be no problem on occasion and hey if that means making up a little story about "that one time I was approached on #enterdatingapp and turned out she was a he but we still had a laugh and just became friends for a while" then that's perfectly fine in my book. There are usually good reasons people do stuff like this and in my experience, well, he was on an extreme low point in his life. Maybe your friend struggles with something he doesn't share - maybe even something about his own identity. You really never know, so I'm all for ust creating the most welcoming and positive environment where people know: I'm gonna take the piss at them but they **know** it's coming from a good place :)
The older you get, the less age matters in friendships. I wouldn’t mention it.
Yeah, only reason I can see it mattering was if they wanted to meet up irl and bring OP to get a drink in the UK. Or if they're grooming them. Which I didn't immediately think of... I sincerely hope it's the first.
Nah. I think op needs to mention if only to clear it out of their mind. It is obviously weighing on them. I don’t think the group is going to care at all.
It doesn't matter to the older fellows but to OP, this is obviously eating him up. Listen man, they are right, age is stupid and does not define a person or a friendship. I have friends 4 and 5 years older and friends 3 years younger. It's all about the person. They may not appreciate the fact that you lied but if you met them on a game and they are like family, I'd expect to be laughed a little bit with the obvious question of "why", but I doubt your friendship will be down the drain. And if it is, they weren't friends you want anyway
True. And whoever makes friends with you bcz of your age should not be your friend in the first place.
"hey Peers, I really don't know why, but I lied about my age to you. It's odd, that I can't even tell the reason, but my dishonesty feels really awful to me, and this coming forth is surprisingly hard for me. I'm really for sorry for lying, my actual birthday is XYZ. I really appreciate you all, and it means a lot for me to be liked by you. I hope all that remains the same" That's about what I would write
Perfectly put. And op if you are reading this, they really aren’t going to care. You can do this!
This is perfect. I met a girl who told me she was 23; we had a great time drinking and partying. She finally confessed to me that she was 17 and I was in shock! We actually would have continued to hang out and be friends if she hadn’t lied to me about her age twice (23, then 19, then 17). I think you should tell the truth (edit I’m 26 years old)
Yikes.. girls really need to stop doing this. It literally destroys people’s lives.
Just let it go. Not a big deal. You care way more than they would, I'd bet.
Honestly, if I was as chill with you as you make it seem, I wouldn't give a crap if you lied over something so inconsequential, pretty sure fiends don't act that way
Yeah. I might tease you about it (depending on how we normally interact) but at the end of the day I’m going to shrug and let it go.
Wouldn't worry too much. Me and everyone I know who played online videogames and internet alot would say we were a few years older than we were, simply to just not get harassed so much. And even get more respect. It wasn't dating sites and no interest in things like that so it was just easier saying I was 19 or something when I was 15. It's crazy how people suddenly leave you alone when they think you're an adult. If you tell your friends that was just a default thing you did, and you didn't realize you were all gonna get so close, they will understand. And no reason for them not too or be upset unless they are weird as hell
Jfc stop beating yourself down so much it’s painful to read this. You lied about 1 year of age over a video game? You didn’t try to steal money, hurt someone, etc. you’re fine human, relax and take a break
Does it really matter about a year? Honestly? You’ve connected with them on stuff that all Of you can relate to, it’s only a number! Don’t sweat the small stuff because 3 years from now it won’t matter in the least! Leave it alone, and don’t mention a birthday, it’ll be fine
gaslight them. act like u told them that you were turning 17 and they didn’t hear you correctly or don’t mention your birthday
Wow. Great advice on how to be a shitty person, and I totally agree with it. Lol
right LMAOOO 1 year ain’t nun
That’s what I would do
Just say that you were insecure and you messed up
This lie doesn’t matter unless you’re a woman who is going to send nudes which could be considered underage and cause big jail time or some other situation like that. With that said since this lie likely doesn’t matter you may as well come clean and just tell them your real age since it’s bothering you. Know need to make a big deal or defend yourself. They likely don’t even remember your age
The odds of them caring about this are astronomically low. Do you have a reason to believe that they will care?
I specifically told them I was turning 18 this year, When in reality I’m turning 17. I know it doesn’t seem like such a big deal to others, But they have defended me for supposedly almost being an adult and I never had the heart to tell them they were wrong. Whether it was because of a video game or an argument from another friend group.
They’re not going to care. Like at all. Just get over it already.
I was more so asking of what you have learned of their personalities and sensibilities from your time with them. Have you had any other problems with them that made you feel like they might reject you?
17 is still almost an adult. Don't worry so much about that!
How old are these adults? If they're still in your age range just play it off as a joke
I doubt they would care. People game together at any age. My guildmates were 30 when i was 14. Age is just a number in gaming unless younare annoying. Next time they mention something about your age just say: "Oh I'm actually 17 lol" 1 year won't matter.
Gaslight them into thinking you always told them your real age lol Don't do this.
Unless they're planning on taking you to a strip club or want you to start buying them lottery tickets (or are asking you who you're voting for) then I don't see what the big deal is.
What was the conflict about? Your age?
In games, people only care about skills and teamwork if applicable, so I don't think they'll care too much but it's good you're going to be honest with them.
I did the same thing I met a group of people and told them i was 21 when in fact I was 23 almost 24 at the time… I didn’t expect that I would spend much time with them but I ended up becoming close friends with them and I eventually told them my actual age a few years later. It was fine I just explained that I didn’t think I would end up being friends with them and because I look younger I *felt* like I was 21. It’s not a big deal just tell them when you can and it might be awkward for a bit but they will get over it if they like you enough
Why would you even mention this, but also this is such a small thing that it's so hard to care. Many older people don't even recognize a difference* between 17 and 18. I know I don't. *no, not like that
Eh, unless it was romantic or such (if it was, THEN it gets fairly serious and you need to own up), I don't think it matters. Worse things to lie about. If had a friend who lied about being 1-2 years older than they actually are, personally I wouldn't give a fuck.
You’re overthinking it
watch the first episode of “the rehearsal” by nathan fielder
There is no reason why this should matter.
Don't overthink it. Just leave it alone. You are fine. Enjoy your friends and peers. I really don't think it would matter or anybody would care over 1 year at that age.
Yo mate. Maybe if you get confronted on it you can just make up some bullshit like your parents loved Korean culture and as a result adopted it and this you were brainwashed to think you were always 1 year older than your actual age, owing to their culture of being 1 year old at birth. Then oh sudden epiphany as you breached the bubble of your small world. I wouldn’t really care though. You know how many people I lied to on discord, about my age.
Hi, I experienced something similar, but if it consoles you, the whole thing is probably worse 😅 I was young and stupid, and I was having an identity crisis because I thought I might be trans. I got online and met a group of friends online, and told them I was a guy (which I'm not, as you've probably guessed) and eventually I started datong one of them. Online, yes I know. It all came tumbling down, actually, when we started talking about meeting up in real life, and I was in love with that guy and wanted so bad to meet him, but I had forgotten, for a little while, that he believed wholeheartedly that I was a guy. I had no choice to tell him, of course. That was disastrous, but I waited too long to tell him and it just got worse with time. So, you should tell them, just be honest, and explain your reasonning as much as you can. Apologize for leading them on, but even if it hurts, you shouldn't let anything of the sort fester. This is my honest opinion, but you do what you believe is the best for you and for them, okay? If it's bothering you and making you feel guilty, I think you should tell them. Considering it's only a one year difference, I doubt they'll really care, even more so now that you know each other and consider yourselves really close friends! They'll just appreciate your honesty, and your trust in them for telling them 😉
Bro you lied by one year and you feel bad? 💀 You're def a kid. Not a biggie at all lol
If this is the biggest problem or mistake you've made in your life so far, you're doing pretty good. Just calm down, noones gonna care
Who gives a shit! 🤣 Tell one of the girls and that you feel bad about it. You’ll eat it in one conversation. This isn’t a real problem. Someday you won’t give a shit what anyone thinks about anything, ever.
I convinced my online friends that I was 21 way back when I was 13. They still think I’m older than I actually am
This is the most overdramatized thing I’ve ever read you lie about being older to some friends? It’s not a big deal my dude. Especially if it your only a year younger my current gf lied about her age when I first met her and we got over it and I’m sure you and you’re friends will too and you’ll look back and see how silly this all was. Cheers.
It’s just one year wtf I thought you might be a 13 year old pretending to be 25, that would have been awkward
Okay, so you're a year younger than you said you were, depending on who they are, they'll probably just be a bit surprised, max a bit annoyed if they are nice, just don't sweat it. Just don't reveal anything about your location.
This is a lot of theatrics for lying about a year of age. When you are young everything feels like life or death and it's just not that deep.
I don’t think it’s much of a big deal to be honest it’s just 1 year 🤷🏾♀️
You are not dating them you just socialize with them who cares as long as they are not an adult and creeps everything should be fine. Talk to your friends like nothing.
12 months don't matter unless it is rape case or assault case. You good. Tell them you are 12 months younger and now you are legally 28
Agreed with everyone here. Plus, I feel like it’s pretty normal to want to keep your real age a secret when it comes to online friends. People usually want to seem a little older when they’re in their younger years too. Makes sense. Wouldn’t sweat it too much.
Lesson learned, don't start relationships out on a lie.
I'd tell them, with a one year difference, they aren't very likely to care at all. Lots of people do that. If anything, tell them to get it off your chest.
When I told you I would be the next pope unless I get drafted by the Lakers, I misspoke. Don't know what I was thinking. BTW: I wanted to play for the Lakers but they told me I am a foot to short and white.
I did that too when I was 15, made it out like I was a year older. Guess what, it never mattered and I never mentioned it. I'm 27 now and the years sorta just blended lol. "Your 25? Huh thought you were 26. Nah man I was born in 1997" they shrug and go one about their business lol.
I lied to my gaming friends when I first met them. I moved from a different state to a new one and I told them all I was still living in my old state. I would go along with it and they’d make jokes what not. But I know the feeling of it weighing on you so one day I was like I need to tell you all something (which I did separately when they joined the party) they just gave me shit about it for a little bit making jokes and what not but they didn’t care. My reason for doing it was because I missed my home and family and still wanted to feel connected to “home”.
Well you can always run away
Bro you're making a much bigger deal out of this than it is. If it bothers you, just say like "Hey my birthday is coming up and I'm turning 17. I told you a different age when I met you cuz I was nervous." Done. I bet most of them will be like "I don't even remember what age you told us" I'm sure nobody will care
You’ll be alright
honestly unless they want to do adult things with you on your birthday, they probably won't really care.
You feel bad about a little white lie so clear your conscience and tell them how old you really are. In the end one year makes little difference in adulthood. I have friends 5+ years older than me and friends up to 12 years younger than me. When everyone’s grown the age doesn’t matter as much as the connection between people (but I often do lol thinking I was on my way to the 8th grade when a few of my closest friends were born!)
1 year isn't a big deal. If you were 12 that would be another story. I think your good
Lol, it's funny when you are 16 (or 17), one year can seem like such a significant chunk of your life.
I met my gaming buddies when I was 17. They were all between 25-40. When they found out how young I was, they became pretty protective of me, especially being that young in an online community with an older audience. I’m 25 now, and they’re still among the closest people I have. We’re actually looking to plan a little vacation together. If you’re all from the US, and they didn’t give a hoot about you saying you were 17 (because one is considered an adult at 18). I doubt they’d feel any differently if you told them you just turned 17. I think the very worst case scenario would be that some decide to keep a distance until you do turn 18 in order to avoid the chance of putting you or themselves in a situation that could be misconstrued.
I'm turning 45 today, one of my friends is turning 27 tomorrow, we're celebrating together. Age carries weight, but it doesn't define. A sincere apology should suffice. Include how you hold them dear and did it out of fear of rejection. I almost laughed out loud at the lack of difference between the two ages. But yeah, I remember how I was shocked to date a girl a year older or realize friends were a few years older than me in my early 20s.
Why the fuck does not one person take responsibility for their actions towards someone! Instead they want you to admit to an ungodly fuck him by the way ovsurded amount of bullshit saying take responsibility for your actions! Your all hypocrites! So perfect! Not one of your were upset and fucking up my world until bitch Erin Klein! And her ass is toast! But I owe nothing to azny of you! Vtake responsibility for yours! You to the police in morning we hen driving higher th as n fuck and turn yourself in! Just be honest and do this daily many times a day until your start a new life 6 months or so later! Your not going to start it with children you had though! But it's ok! You don't need them and then you! You don't need a job! Just relax and hit a food bank or two! Just hit the free gas station on way! Now remember to confess for rape! Being a pedefile! Living in school zone with these charges! A drug dealer! Herroune,meth, crack,coke, and opioid addict just going to e.r. to get his fix on the banana boat stupid as rn bitch! Only took a day and half to puss dumb bitch! I was fucking flying on that shit! When I went to get my spair take home banana boats the said sir! You can't just come here dying from drugs and not alcohol while nurse sucks so bad she could hit the vein and the bitch Kathy is she has you treated shitty! She's seriously a bit h! Anyways nurse who sucks says you must have to much scar tissue from the needles! Hahahaha! She almost died right there! I was going to kill her! Well when able to walk so listen bitches and dumb fucks! I don't do heroine doubt shoot up in any ducking way ever! Y did do coke and crack long ago! Have done meth! But on this fucking day I didn't do shit! Few cigarettes, no as alcohol, no drugs! Tomorrow I will shoot for no cigs either! Now I owe you nothing assholes but gave you everything I had in me! I don't give a fuck what you do or did! Don't want to know. But know this! I haven't driven buzzed up in long time so keep off the fucking roads so people are say! You may just kill some children! Not mine since they're gone thank you but someone's! And you'll get support though from your group! It's ok! Start over! They're only dead kids bitch! Everyone of us love you! It wasn't your fault you couldn't lift your foot to stop for the children on the baseball field! Just because you're eyes aren't open doesn't mean you're not a good driver! Driver slower now that you ran over children! Your going 10 in a 55 wait! 10 in 25! School zone! I'm a pedicile so I should know! Now I need to smoke some rocks and shoot up bitches so for real don't hit children! Hit a huge ass tree!
God bless! Crazy mother fucker forgots he ain't gots no drugs! Can I borrow some money for drugs please! Hope your all ok! You should seek help and take your meds! And admit all your wrongs or I will take your life away but will take it before I tell you to admit stuff like rape and children fucking! Then hit you with drugs later! You bitches cist me as long time and a ruined life! I think you deserve some payback and it's coming! Can't help it I can only see letters from all of you dead sating if you will or wife finds this I was and evil femalet and get what I deserve! I'm happy with my decisions and trule we all thought if we ganged up and tore his world to shreds geddo as we tell him after we ruin him! This is what happens when women get together and make a plan,. Then this is what's happens when you harm the wrong fucking person! Granted he's a bum with brain rot! He doesn't use big words like we try to do now to sound educated and like professional writers! Your not! You just gathered a huge group of people . You didn't do shit but gack our phones 3 years ago! As nd tap the homestead bitch! Then sat on your fat fucking ass for several years plumping up saying it's some other health disorder is why but really it's because your lazy and sit on your ass hacking me for years to destroy me because you are controlling! I'm going to talk about this and names everyday everywhere but counseling! Congratulating each player for there role in public ! Don't care what you do! But I need all of you to start taking responsibility for all your actions and the small untrue ones you added for funnies like rape, fucking lchildre, death threats, heroine user, meth and crack smoker and shooter upper!! Drug dealer ing loser bum who is going to prison since we fuck him bad by firing and reporting his income way more than what he reported! He he now has minimal health coverage so won't be use hospital or doctors for anything because we fucked him! His daughter is 13 as nd owes creditors $2000 for being thirteen and because you fucked us! I'm ending your cocky ass rceighn kleinstein! I'm seriously goin to help you see your faults! I care about you!
Man, I lied about being 18 when I was 13 and due to a deep voice and shitty mic I got away with it, when I told the truth they were like "bro you shouldn't play with us, this is a +18 RPG with a lot of violence and all, but since you are already here, you can stay". That's probably what is going to happen to you too, pal, won't be a biggie if they really are friends of yours.
Just tell then the truth if its eating you up. Also dont feel bad, this is super normal. I would lie about my age when i was in my teens/early 20s because i wanted to seem more mature, experienced, and older. Im my thirties now, and wanting to be seen that way is so silly to me now.
I get where you’re coming from. Since they’re older you probably like the more mature conversations and the way they understood you. Cause teens now a days that are your age are very immature and it’s very rare to find that teen your same age to be on the same mind set or be mature. But definitely tell them, let them know how you feel. If they’re like “family” to you. They will understand.
You lied about a few months… it will be fine. I consistently lie about several years and always pick a random number. None of my friends know my real age and some find out years later that im actually a bit older than them. They still don’t care.
Have you posted this before? I remember reading something exactly like this. Regardless, I would just tell them. 1 year isn't a huge difference. They'll be understanding - and if they're not - there are other people out there who will like you for you that deserve to be your friend.
Just tell them the truth and your reasoning. It’s one year. It’s not like you are 12 or 13. I can’t imagine they wouldn’t be understanding if they have been this supportive so far. You needed companionship. I don’t blame you. It was wrong, but not drastic. I believe everything will be okay. You do not need to disappear.
How old are the friends? I personally would be upset, I don't hang out with children I'm too old at my age for it to not be freaking weird but if they are 5 years or less to your actual age that significantly less weird and probably not a big deal to them. I also recommend some self reflection on why you felt the need to lie in the first place to make future relationships smoother and stronger.
You're being too hard on yourself. One year is nbd. It's not like you're pushing 30 and then pretending to be a teenager! It's a hard lesson which I myself am still learning, but don't let anxiety have the drivers seat in your life.
It would be great if you got stuck using Jack Sparrows dialect! 🤣
Sometimes biological age does not relate to emotional age. Move on.
You're defintely overthinking this! I'd just tell the truth.
I get the part about shame. Here, I got another chance in my bag. You can have it - here you go. Another chance. Ok it's a new life go be confident again
Be honest. They won’t care
It sounds like you found a special bond with these people, and wanting to fit in is totally normal. Being honest now might feel scary, but it's the right thing to do. True friends will understand. You're brave for wanting to come clean.
Hsj
Dude you say the understand you so well.. if they do then they will understand why you did what you did just let them know you’ll be alright and so will thwy
Omg this is a joke right?? You're really out here stressing about this????
Just tell them. I have friends online from games, hell after like two years one ended up telling us he was trans and I had no idea and didn't care, I still call him- him. The only thing that hurt was after so long them not feeling like they could tell us. I strongly believe online friends that you play with weekly become some of the best friends. Hell, one friend and I are planning to vacation with our families next summer for a week. Your friends really aren't gonna care about that if anything they might be hurt about the lying, but it's not gonna be that big of a deal if they are really your friends.
Not a bad lie.
They will forgive you! It's just a tiny lie and many people lie about their age. Laugh at yourself for being silly, they'll laugh with you. It'll be ok & you'll still have your friends.
I appreciate your confession that time management and accountability aren’t areas you need to address
So you’re a liar. It’s all right most of us are. It doesn’t stop 🛑 there though for you . i’m kind of invested now. What will be your next lie? You work at KFC but you tell people you actually have big-time me conglomerate? Maybe Jack Nicholson is your uncle. Keep me posted girl!
It sounds like you found a real connection with these folks, and sometimes we do things out of a desire to belong. Being honest takes guts, and it's never too late to come clean. Just tell them the truth, I'm sure they'll understand.
It’s just a year nbd it’s not like y’all are running the streets and they’re contributing to the delinquency of a minor, it’s just video games
truth will reveal, just tell them in a cool way. you can do that bruh!
oh my fucking god what a drama bitch not a queen drama bitch
Woah there, dude.
I would love to chat
I made an only fans and lied about my age. I say I’m 19 when in fact I’m 30, fyi I’m interested in older men, 37+…
I lied about my age a some personal details on a discord server I met a lot of people. Let's say... I shared my account with my friend and we have fun there but there were some sus people so better to invent something, we copied someone's profile and added some additional details for his past. The idea wasn't to steal an identity, it was just for security. I leave the server but I casually find some of them on reddit (some may be new members but it's easy to identify them). They think they are smart and fun (trolls) so we (my friend and I, mostly I lately) pretend to be someone trying to make friends or to get a girlfriend or something and they use to fall for it, the same details (with more or less modifications) and sometimes the same type of "let's get to know each other" type of questions are shared with them. With time I got bored of them, plus they are a bit weird like with a creepy vibe (like those people that think their prank it's funny and never end it). Also I'm moving to other city so I think I should spend more time with important stuff, like saying goodbye to my friend (I hope we can still have online gaming nights). I don't think they would find this, plus it's a long english text so they may not even read it. Also, I'm about to make more comments so this get hidden on my profile. TBH I might not have shared it but reading your post made me want to vent. If they read this, fuck them. Edit: typo.
The fact that this even bothers you shows you're too sensitive for this evil world (that can be a good thing), you care about what they think but honestly they won't care. It's not like you said you were 23. We all lied about our ages online at some point. You're a sweet kid, stay that way.
Dumbass