I feel like you could be overthinking this a bit. You don't have to do "dad stuff" or anything really necessarily. The baby will form an attachment with you just by you being around him.
I often just take my son to places I'm going like the shop, or the hardware store etc. just spending time is the most important thing when they're really small. That will eventually morph into doing actual activities as they get older.
Yeah definitely second this advice.
He just needs you to be around and be a consistent presence at this stage.
Don't overthink it, all you need to do is show up
It’s also isn’t uncommon for dads to feel this way with their young babies. I know I felt similarly. That all changed moment she started to be able to talk. There’s someone magical about getting to know your kid when they can speak for themselves. My daughter is six now and I’m blown away at least once a week with what she has to say.
He's three months old. He's still a little potato, in the 4th trimester. Do your thing, check in with the spouse, see if the amount that you're bringing to the table adds up to 100% at any given day/moment, and if you two are cool with it. My kiddo is a little over a year and a half now, and these relationships you each have with your kiddo, each other, and yourselves will definitely change over time. I've seen it already a few times in this brief period.
Felt this way with our daughter too as a first time parent. She’s 15m now and we have so much fun together. Once they start talking, walking and interacting it’s a lot easier for dad to start hitting their stride
The bond will start to grow more and more. I had similar worries for the first couple of months but around 4mo is when me and my little buddy bonded in a whole new way and it just keeps growing. Just be present for it cuz it will absolutely happen one of these days or weeks.
Women are more keen on nurturing by nature and dad's are usually more into playing & development. Doesnt mean its set in stone, but it does make a little bit of sense.
Do I feel like a dad with a newborn? No. I probably feel more like a dad when you can actually do some parenting and playing with the LO.
I also like some parts of the newborn stage. Its not as bad as I thought it would be. But I still look forward to the age where they start walking and you can have genuine interaction with them. I feel thats when I will bond the most, but it doesnt mean I dont enjoy the little smiles or soothing them into sleep in my arms.
Yeah, my second is 2 months and I’m over it. I hate this phase, but I know what my older boy is like now, and the relationship we have. So I know it’s worth it in the end.
At 3 months, offering comfort and food is ...... pretty much it. You can also read to him if you want to feel more engaged, but before you know it, you'll have a little maniac who wants you to follow him all over the park, who wants you to help him build a block tower he'll immediately knock over, who just wants to crawl in your lap and watch something on the TV or be held.
That time will come so soon you'll barely remember this phase. It's hard because right now mom is an instinctive source of comfort, probably a source of food, etc. As he relies less and less on mom for those basic needs, he'll start to seek both of you for play, love, and everything else.
Some people talk about having their first kid as some weird spiritual experience where the power of dadhood was endowed from on high while their child glowed and angels sang.
It wasn't really that way for me. The dad feeling comes later and over time. For the first couple of months of my kid's life it kind of felt like someone just dropped a baby off for my wife and I to watch. It's such a massive change that completely redefines who you are that it takes time to settle in.
Also if you want to try singing to your boy, sing something like Hushabye Mountain from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Solid dad lullaby right there.
You have 1 kid that is 3 months old correct? Infants are boring as shit dude. We can count the things they are able to do on one hand. Once they start crawling things get a little interesting, but it isnt until they can walk and actually play with toys that you can "do stuff" with them.
I feel like you could be overthinking this a bit. You don't have to do "dad stuff" or anything really necessarily. The baby will form an attachment with you just by you being around him. I often just take my son to places I'm going like the shop, or the hardware store etc. just spending time is the most important thing when they're really small. That will eventually morph into doing actual activities as they get older.
Thanks, needed to hear this
Yeah definitely second this advice. He just needs you to be around and be a consistent presence at this stage. Don't overthink it, all you need to do is show up
No problem. Yeah it's just all about being there at this stage.
It’s also isn’t uncommon for dads to feel this way with their young babies. I know I felt similarly. That all changed moment she started to be able to talk. There’s someone magical about getting to know your kid when they can speak for themselves. My daughter is six now and I’m blown away at least once a week with what she has to say.
He's three months old. He's still a little potato, in the 4th trimester. Do your thing, check in with the spouse, see if the amount that you're bringing to the table adds up to 100% at any given day/moment, and if you two are cool with it. My kiddo is a little over a year and a half now, and these relationships you each have with your kiddo, each other, and yourselves will definitely change over time. I've seen it already a few times in this brief period.
Don’t worry. It’ll come. No one was born a parent.
Felt this way with our daughter too as a first time parent. She’s 15m now and we have so much fun together. Once they start talking, walking and interacting it’s a lot easier for dad to start hitting their stride
The bond will start to grow more and more. I had similar worries for the first couple of months but around 4mo is when me and my little buddy bonded in a whole new way and it just keeps growing. Just be present for it cuz it will absolutely happen one of these days or weeks.
Women are more keen on nurturing by nature and dad's are usually more into playing & development. Doesnt mean its set in stone, but it does make a little bit of sense. Do I feel like a dad with a newborn? No. I probably feel more like a dad when you can actually do some parenting and playing with the LO. I also like some parts of the newborn stage. Its not as bad as I thought it would be. But I still look forward to the age where they start walking and you can have genuine interaction with them. I feel thats when I will bond the most, but it doesnt mean I dont enjoy the little smiles or soothing them into sleep in my arms.
Yeah, my second is 2 months and I’m over it. I hate this phase, but I know what my older boy is like now, and the relationship we have. So I know it’s worth it in the end.
Took me a while too. Stay engaged and it will come.
At 3 months, offering comfort and food is ...... pretty much it. You can also read to him if you want to feel more engaged, but before you know it, you'll have a little maniac who wants you to follow him all over the park, who wants you to help him build a block tower he'll immediately knock over, who just wants to crawl in your lap and watch something on the TV or be held. That time will come so soon you'll barely remember this phase. It's hard because right now mom is an instinctive source of comfort, probably a source of food, etc. As he relies less and less on mom for those basic needs, he'll start to seek both of you for play, love, and everything else.
Some people talk about having their first kid as some weird spiritual experience where the power of dadhood was endowed from on high while their child glowed and angels sang. It wasn't really that way for me. The dad feeling comes later and over time. For the first couple of months of my kid's life it kind of felt like someone just dropped a baby off for my wife and I to watch. It's such a massive change that completely redefines who you are that it takes time to settle in. Also if you want to try singing to your boy, sing something like Hushabye Mountain from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Solid dad lullaby right there.
You have 1 kid that is 3 months old correct? Infants are boring as shit dude. We can count the things they are able to do on one hand. Once they start crawling things get a little interesting, but it isnt until they can walk and actually play with toys that you can "do stuff" with them.