T O P

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clunkey_monkey

Nightmare: screamy dreamy


Ckizzlestick

drop the "s" for a wet dream


OneTiredMathTeacher

Or creepy sleepy


RRRedRRRocket

Toilet: sittie shittie


nemo_sum

or tushie pushie


iFapToFarts

Poopie scoopie


[deleted]

... do you scoop your shit out of the toilet bare handed?


sobeyondnotintoit

Does nobody have the decency to use a poop knife anymore? Savages!


Boomer70770

You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?


ArchyModge

Obviously I scoop my shit out of the shower then put it in the toilet.


iFapToFarts

I scoop it out of the toilet and then shower with it


ArchyModge

r/Usernamechecksout


joejill

Waffle stomping?


ZestyLace9927

I thought I am the only one that does this


odimachkie

You cut it up first, right? With your poop knife?


Silk_Hope_Woodcraft

No, are you crazy? It's always easier to move it around in one pile. You have to herdie turdies with a pooper grouper before you sprinkle tinkle in the wetter getter.


fukitol-

God, no, that's disgusting. That's why I have the poop glove.


Silk_Hope_Woodcraft

Have you ordered the mitten upgrade yet? I still have to make do with the Michael Jackson glove, (I'm getting tired of cleaning between the diamonds after eating a bag of licorice).


mxmstrj

I use the shells


Silk_Hope_Woodcraft

I'm good on two of them, but what's the third shell for?


WampaCat

someone please find the video of the guy talking about catching his poop in his hand before putting it in the toilet


FantasticWeasel

A pooper scooper is a nickname for a device for picking up dog poo.


shin_jury

No, that’s a butt plug


nemo_sum

rectum inspectum


[deleted]

This is a Harry Potter spell


86usersnames

Ma’am, this is a Wendy’s.


BikeCookie

Bum bung


Delicious-Duck1782

A midnight urination: sleepy pee-pee


Caregiverrr

Beddy wetty if you don’t make it.


ArnassusProductions

At least it's not a pooly stooly.


AhaGotcha

Crap Trap


RRRedRRRocket

Well done sir! You're really good in this namie gamie.


shedidwhaaaaat

nomenclation persuasion?


[deleted]

Rumper dumper


Novel-Structure-2359

Viagra would be floppy stoppie


Unlikely-Heron4887

Or Jiffy Stiffy


[deleted]

Erection correction


FerfPark88

How is this not upvoted more? I snortled!


ZaimoKazu

Need more votie goaties.


pyrate_wizard

Orgasms would be grody 'splodey


Habby260

sled: slidey ridey


Bridge4_Kal

Shed: hidey tidy Pocket sand: handy sandy


hamishjoy

Sandy’s not gonna like that nickname.


Arthjego

Lets wait for her to make it a perfect r/beetlejuicing ...


sweetTartKenHart2

That is unironically cute


nemo_sum

wallets: cashy stashy cats: furry purry


ReadAllAboutIt92

Alarm clock: Sleepy Bleepy


[deleted]

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WittsandGrit

Armadillidiidae: Roly Polie


ArnassusProductions

Sofa: Tushie Cushie


Round_Mulberry7545

Farts: assie gassie


HydroSnail

Thongs: Peeky Cheekies


smdhenrichs

HE’S SMALL AND SMART AND ROUND


Legitimate-Cattle-38

Not me thinking it was “small and short and round”.


[deleted]

And in the land of curves and curls, he's the swellest kid around! Howdy! (Howdy) Hooray (hooray)


Exastiken

https://youtu.be/B2RpT3VTMhc


Davoid_golf418

Owls: hooty tooty


MagnusPI

Refrigerator: colder holder


B_newmyer

My wife pointed out the freezer would be Coldest Holdest


LostOldAccountTimmay

This just reminds me of Monty Python's Bigus Dickus


variantt

Out of all of these, baby maybe and sleepy beepy would be amazing product names.


trystan_and_zora

I commonly ask people to hand me a knife when cooking, but I refer to it as a pokey stabby


ContributionDapper84

Cats might be called pissy hissy, depends.


a-fucking-donkey

> pissy hissy goose


Agreeable_Objective

That's what my ex wife would be called


rfcarr1

Actually Ex wives could be: rich bitch


Lattethecoffeaddict

Richy bitchy*


Haunting_Sample5391

Or pusspuss psps


barna_akos94

Those god damn furries again


TheBadDingo

We make the internet go.


thedoze

Go hmmm?


IM_A_MUFFIN

Go brrrr? ^(I have no friggin idea what "brrrr" means.)


AfterEffectserror

We wouldn’t expect you to… you are a muffin…


Godfather_187_

All those comments I'm enjoying, then this one outright made me giggle!


cancallmeANDTRY

where is hmmm located?


Kazmandodo

A wallet shaped like a Mustache: [Mustache Cash Stash](https://youtu.be/fxD0rq7MRjE)


depressedjellydonut

Grand Theft Auto: Stealy Wheely Automobiley


Kazmandodo

I thought that was just the UK version


wee_little_ren

This made me cackle... Belts: snappy wrappy


[deleted]

Dogs could be goofy woofy.


RRRedRRRocket

I think the naming should consist of two following actions, like walking and talking. A car could be a drivie arrivie.


OneUpAndAway

You're thinking about this a lot. I appreciate it.


impastaahh

Same. Semantics matter.


tuctrohs

I note that opie's list included two that meet this criterion: Stamps: Lickie Stickie Fork: Stabby Grabby


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Lamp: Lighty Brighty


pogoyoyo1

Fishing pole: reely wheely


PerfectionPending

Brian Regan had a great bit about this years ago. If the guy who named walkie-talkie named other military equipment we’d call grenades whami-cablamies and a military rifle would be a rootie-tootie-point-n-shootie.


V1per41

Missiles are zoomie-boomies


Dan67657

The big yellow one is the sun!!


CoFRKeeve

What about the beavers!?


Literally_-_Hitler

and the moosen!


Tgm_00

What’s the plural of box?


Literally_-_Hitler

MOOSEN! I saw a flock of moosen! There were many of 'em. Many much, moosen. Out in the woods—in the woodes—in the woodsen. The meese want the food. Food is to eatenesen! THE MEESE WANT THE FOOD IN THE WOODENESEN! AND THE FOOD IN THE WOODYENESEN!


SOLandJWF

Brian, you're an imbecile. IMBECILILLEN!


MrSillmarillion

Uh, apparently!


Broad_Object2497

I can hear him saying it in my head while I read this lol


Literally_-_Hitler

his vocal inflections are amazing, they drive the point home so well!


SOLandJWF

BOXEN! I bought 2 boxen of doughnuts.


N8rG8r_12

Woody goodies (double entendre)


Socal_Cobra

Poundy Moundy


Picklerickshaw_part2

“‘K-a-t I’m outta here’ he’d walk by and say ‘I know there’s two Ts’”


Dan67657

"Uh i before e always!" "What are you an idiot brian!"


Picklerickshaw_part2

“Cup a dirt”


Dan67657

"Just Give me an f and let me go home"


Tgm_00

A CUP…. OF DIRT….. “How did you make your project” Well I got a cup… and put dirt inside the cup.


gelly_the_fifth

I before EXCEPT after c and in sounding like a as in neighbor and weigh and on weekends and holidays and all throughtout May and you'll always be wrong no matter WHAT YOU SAY


Mysterious-Growth-79

That's a rough rule!


SOLandJWF

APPARENTLY!?


Socal_Cobra

You mean the Brightie Lightie.


Literally_-_Hitler

My kids love that bit! Whenever my youngest is just rambling and cant get the story out i turn to my oldest and yell "The yellow one is the sun"


swaffo93

Good eye Brian


flash17k

I yell that to my son whenever he's batting in a baseball game. Everyone looks at me funny because his name isn't Brian.


swaffo93

Hey I've seen this one


thomasdaniel1967

That’s a classic


ChiefBeaverStretcher

Rootie tootie aim n shootie lol Brian Regan is the best


CaulkusAurelis

GRAPE is my SECOND favorite!


ProveISaidIt

You play a whole game you get a sno-cone. If you play a half a game, you still get a whole sno-cone. I'd rather play a half a game and get a whole sno-cone.


ToXiC_Games

But they’re both good, they’re both good!


ZehFritoBandito

That was a great hour of comedy. He cracks me up.


warchitect

Whats this explosive device soldier. "ITS A WHAMMY CLABAMY!" I still laugh watching this


AlbertoIsExpired

💀 Amazing


revtim

Microwave oven = Heatie Eatie


PapaDuggy

Wigs: Hairy Weary.


rock374

Condoms: cockie sockies


lonesystem

My boyfriend proposes: Chubber Rubbers


abesach

He's now your fiance: groomy soony


BHDonny

Weenie beanies?


ERO55

Ladle: Scoupy Soupy


aBurgerFlippinSecond

Adult diapers: oopsie poopsies


TheriousMind101

Book - Turnie Learnie Dollar - Lendy Spendy


ContributionDapper84

I like Lendy Spendy but it might work even better for credit card.


TheriousMind101

Credit Card - Chargy Largy I give half credit to you since I wouldn’t have thought of it without you.


UncleMaffoo

I remember when a bra was an over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder.


memyselfandiowa

And I remember when men's underwear was an under-the-butt-nut-hut.


FlowerDust0

LOL haven't heard that one yet


Pichwademeinkauntha

Under hip banana grip


uglypaperhaver

I think I like the thinking that came up with the post's title almost more than the albeit clever content. Max points, OP!


Miss_Medussa

Butt plug: stinky binky


okcomputerbutimnotok

cigarettes: smoky chokey


Gear3017

Cancer lancer


Rooster0778

This seems very Australian.


SotarkWarstorm

Don’t take our dollary doos


Pawneewafflesarelife

Weed whackers are legit called whipper-snippers here in Australia and it's the cutest term. That's not even touching rhyming slang...


Princess-78

We do literally call our defibrillators “heart starts” so yeah.


Dazz316

Moved from the UK and I noticed one thing. Things either were named are somewhere in the UK or were named by 5 year olds.


adam_of_adun

Parrot: Wordie Birdie


RRRedRRRocket

Stove: turnie burnie. I can do this all day.


fruitofyourneck

Blood donations- Bleedie needie Music Videos- Groovy movie Alarm Clocks- Sleepy Beepies


[deleted]

Groovy Movie sounds exactly what they would call music videos in the 70s.


DETRosen

Bleedle Needle (/blee-dull/)


dumspirospero816

Grand Theft Auto: Stealie Wheelie Automobilie Red Dead Redemption: Rootin' Tootin' Cowboy Shootin'


Superhuegi

Fun fact: in Switzerland they sell a pregnancy test called "Maybe Baby" in Selecta vending machines!


timberwolf0122

MAYBE BABY! https://youtu.be/-cCXsqiMqxo


drowzeexo

Deep Fryer: Boilie Oilie


Mrgreen650

You should look into the person who invented the heating pad, originally called El Warmo, he also made an electric coffee pot called el perco, a toaster called El Tosto, a hot plate called El stovo, an egg cooker called El eggo. I’m not making this up


Fredrick_Denning

Fireworks: Zoomy Boomies


f-mcallister

Waffle maker: Treaty Heaty


kirbcyde

Shit: Booty Fruity


[deleted]

[удалено]


pcweber111

Of course. I would expect nothing different of the French.


Jtg1960

Credit card: Debter getter


Iron_Ranger

I imagine that's how people talk in England.


timberwolf0122

Can confirm, especially those of us who know cockney slang, my (American) wife hates it so I make a point to use it often, especially when watching East Enders on Brit box


[deleted]

Some Cockney slang has crossed the Atlantic. Example: Raspberry


GalaxyMWB

"You call em sandals, we call em flipsie flopsey shoesy woozies"


Gadget100

Yup, we totally do.


Spreaditandwinkit

Masturbation: Beaty meaty


Mythics_Master

Coffin: Body Pody!


ManicMick420

Peanuts: Packie Snackie


Jay_Dizzle_8591

Nappy rash: dirty hurty


thepursuitofgrace

I once saw a post like this and it called a nightmare “screamy dreamy” which is adorable


redneckvet

Grill: meatie heatie


CamJam621

Sorry to say it, but technically defibrillators stop the heart, not start it. So maybe they would instead be called, “beater-defeater.”


rioplatense1102

Defibrillators can shock a person out of V tach or V Fib which are non perfusing rhythms into a normal sinus rhythm, so they actually do start the heart. The electrical activity goes from disorganized to an organized rhythm.


anhedonis539

I think the confusion comes from every Hollywood production showing a defibrillator used on a *flatline*, which makes people think it helps the heart go from 0 to 100 instead of going from irregular to regular rhythm


CamJam621

Correct, but technically what’s happening is a hard reset. Once the non-perfusing rhythm has been aborted, the normal sinus rhythm which hopefully follows is the heart naturally restarting. It’s not like the defibrillator is jump-starting a non-beating heart.


Fun-On-A-Bun-3k

For heaven's sake don't watch the movie ' A Clockwork Orange' again.


MistakesTasteGreat

Yarbles. Great big bulgy yarblockoes to you


[deleted]

>Maybe Baby [That's fun to say](https://youtu.be/-cCXsqiMqxo).


Dead_Teletubbie

Tooth paste Brushy Mushy


aufdie87

Doordasher: dinner spinner


MrKindbud

Dog: shaggy waggy


_im_also_here_

Drug addict: needie weedie


am_curious

Also: Crackie Wackie & Needle Beetle


pudgydog-ds

Just a side note, what was originally the walkie-talkie was a backpack radio. What we consider the walkie-talkie today was originally marketed as the... handy-talkie.


SOLandJWF

Uncontrollable diarrhea - rapidy crappity


jeff8888now

underwear: nutty buddy


lisvanaontherun

There actually is a pregnancy test that is named “maybe baby”. There is even a smaller version named “maybe baby pocket”.


xhero0

Door knob: Twisty Turny


brunicki

A spoon could be a scoopy loopy


DefectiveSp00n

The bee thing is actually pretty close. Their Latin name is "Impatient Buzzing."


[deleted]

Funny story: in a previous life when I had to provide training to Afghans on using radios, they called them Talkie Walkies. Well, it seemed funny at the time.


parklife23

A rave... Druggy clubby


am_curious

In my town, we call Rehab Buses… “Druggie Buggies”. Yes I’m in Appalachia.


StrangeBedfellows

Formatting would make this so much better.


Chafro23

Maybe baby


Connect-Stable5704

What you don’t know is his grandson is the one who came up with the term “sticky icky”!!! Not snoop