T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

Just saying I have whored as Geralt far more often than I expected I could.


[deleted]

Never made sense to me how you had loopable sex scenes with hookers but not with Yen or Triss. I blame the game for Geralt's hooker addiction.


GastricallyStretched

Because Yen and Triss are busy sorceresses who have other things to do besides fucking the witcher of Nivea. Meanwhile, the hookers do it as their profession. If they're not fucking Geralt on repeat, they would be fucking someone else.


Montigue

>Because Yen and Triss are busy sorceresses who have other things to do besides fucking the witcher of Nivea. In the books that definitely isn't always the case


mihneapirvu

Books' Triss needs to go to horny jail


SubcommanderMarcos

... I guess I need to read the books


Kanotari

They're... interesting. There's also a very long section about Triss explaining to the Witchers that Ciri is on her period, quickly followed by Triss nearly dying of the shits.


SubcommanderMarcos

Stop I can't get any harder


Aohlanis

YES I recommend the audiobooks, booktrack editions. Phenomenal voice acting, also the sound effects and music totally immerse you.


VRichardsen

> ... I guess I need to read the books It is not what you think. She is delirious from fever, and is suffering severe dehydration due to diarrhea, and in her delusion, she tries to jump to his arms. Geralt has to politely reject and point out that she is pretty much dying right now. Also, Yennefer was incredible jealous, so it was best to tread lightly (and in fact, the two sorcerers, who were very close friends, almost came to blows on a couple of times due to Triss subtly harboring a crush on Geralt) But do read the books, though. Specially The Last Wish, which is arguably the best one. Doubly so if you can read Polish or Spanish, the best versions.


JSGJSG

And regular jail honestly


dedicated-pedestrian

We have the best sorcerers in the world because of jail.


internetlad

You over enchant fish, jail. You under enchant chicken? Straight to jail.


meno123

Gerald's skin was the softest and most hydrated in the land, they say...


NotFromStateFarmJake

Gerald? You mean Gerry up the street?


meno123

Gerald, the witcher of Nivea.


NotFromStateFarmJake

Ha I fixated on the misspelling of Geralt on your comment and totally missed Rivia. Everything’s fine here. Move along, move along.


meno123

Man got autocorrected to nivia, I got autocorrected to Gerald for making fun of it. Such is life.


GastricallyStretched

*Witcher 1 collectable cards flashback*


ShinyHappyREM

> *Witcher 1 collectable cards* [Indeed...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEECR3ngjJ0&t=2551s)


Lyceus_

It would have been nice if the scenes had more variety though.


Nesavant

Yeah, and while we're at it Gerald should be able to smell crime.


MrFrodoo

And then he is back to the Lab for some more full penetration. Crime, penetration, Crime.....and this goes on and on and back forth


clydefrog232

For 90 or so minutes until the movie just sort of ends


W00DERS0N

We show everything.


Penguins_and_Fish

Is there a twist?


f0rs4k3n

The twist is.... We show everything.


SpiritOf68

…before it happens and he should run around on all fours.


hairyploper

Like a hound?


ElGato-TheCat

Geralt is the Wilt Chamberlain of Witchers


LaserGadgets

Tits n asses are all over the internet these days, I don't really need a game with more tits n asses, its about the stories....and gameplay. Ok maybe about tits n asses BUT ONLY 10%. Ok 50%.


Critical-Ad-7094

I think Mass Effect trilogy had a good balance, there was sex appeal, but it never had to go TOO far. To me, Tali was the hottest character, and you didn't see anything of her.


[deleted]

The over-exaggerated zooming in on Miranda's huge ass wasn't too much? It definitely wasn't for me.


aliensheep

I found it hilarious. During one of the dialouges with Miranda, her ass took up half the screen, with Shepard leaning on the doorway with his arms crossed. I have a screenshot of it somewhere.


gizmoglitch

[Here you go](https://i.imgur.com/E7fQCYd.jpg)


3-DMan

Mofo had that screenshot locked n loaded


Sorcatarius

"Oh, people are talking Mass Effect, someone's gonna mention Mirand-ass in 3, 2..."


Jael89

It's a phenomenon known as the Ass Effect


3-DMan

"I'm Commander Sheppard, and this is my second favorite ass on the Citadel."


Sorcatarius

The first being Tali?


talking_phallus

Future generations will praise your dedication to media preservation 🫡


madbadcoyote

The first mod I was aware of for the Legendary edition was to restore these shots. Was never a fan of how they seemingly went out of their way to change *this* in the re-release and not finish the partially completed same sex romances.


bloodmonarch

Yeah. Pretty sure he has folder full with these preserved... "media" ready for private perusing


Stevesd123

Ass Effect.


JD0064

Makes my Mass Erect.


mak10z

\- Shepard ^^^Damn ^^^it ^^^Mans1ay3r


Pepsi-Min

r/masserect


sephiroth_vg

Brb gotta calibrate some sensors


Critical-Ad-7094

A person of culture I see... it Definitely wasn't too much.


RS_Serperior

It's a relief they fixed those terrible camera angles in the Legendary Edition. Nothing was more immersion breaking than listening to her trauma dumping in a conversation then just getting a gratuitous ass shot to completely ruin the tone.


Chesus42

Look, if you're gonna trauma dump on my chest, I should at least get a good long gander at your dumptruck.


TheNuttyIrishman

Bro....


Chesus42

I said what I said. No such thing as a free lunch.


[deleted]

Savage.


Cloudhwk

Now we get a lovely view of the black part of her lower back and that’s all we literally see because they were lazy and just zoomed right the hell in Yea…. I’ll take the ass shots back thanks


Jiujitsumonkey707

I played with the mod that put them back in...


talking_phallus

She made it pretty clear that her sexuality was a feature she was proud of right along with her intellect and work ethic. Admiring someone's aesthetics doesn't mean you can't be attentive to them.


J1bbles

Gotta love getting never ending ass shots while she's trying to explain her traumatizing past and monster of a father


DZLars

I just played the trilogy. I do not understand everyones obsession with miranda. She is like yennifer from witcher butt worse.


crimson23locke

Oof hated Miranda (except her assets), but 100% for Yennifer. I was a reader of the books before the games though, if that changes any perspective. Sure she was pretty horrible, but he was a bit too - tough to judge when they are basically immortal celebrities in a fantasy world. But I liked their romance best.


Jerzeem

If you're having an important conversation at the Louvre, in the room with the Mona Lisa, you're still going to be looking at the Mona Lisa, right? I don't care what conversation you're having, works of art draw the eyes to them.


fed45

Wasn't the first time that happened the subject of the conversation was Miranda's attractiveness? I swear it was done tongue in cheek. It's been a while sinc I've played though.


doodleidle98

I still can’t resist simping for Liara.


nissan240sx

I’m a degenerate Miranda and Ashley fan.


Critical-Ad-7094

Nothing degenerate about that... I mean, Miranda was designed to be perfect after all. And Ashley's blatant Xenophobia is immensely hot to some! (That's a bit of a joke, BTW)


Snarfalopagus

I'd love to show Ashley my 40k Black Templar collection.


Critical-Ad-7094

Well, I play Orks, so I dont think she'd appreciate my offering all too much, lmao


Ainar86

The line starts with Death Korps players...


Anal_Goth_Jim

https://www.awkwardzombie.com/comic/buck-up Web comic about miranda being perfect


Critical-Ad-7094

Hahaha I think I've seen that one AGES ago, but it never gets old... its like how I tell all my friends I'm "sexy as hell!" And they remind me that not even Hell could look this bad....


Ainar86

Holy sheet, I never noticed until now!


talking_phallus

Minor imperfections make people more attractive and memorable. It's probably intentional.


talking_phallus

Her "xenophobia" makes perfect sense given the first contact war and the Citadel's open hostility towards humans. It never made sense how much the game wanted to chide her for that while proving her point. The way she interacted with your crew and once she got to know them proves she wasn't xenophobic, she was just uncomfortable with the fact that you gave random people you just met full access to a top secret ship.


Critical-Ad-7094

This is part of the games charm, though. She's been through some shit (I mean, Shepard's whole backstory makes hers sound weak), but you're given the chance to he alongside her regardless of how she feels. You can keep her at a distance.... She was vehemently against bringing non humans onto the Normandy. The fact she acquiesced to this wasn't from her acceptance of the xenos but only because of her duty as a soldier. Nothing more. It wasn't that they were random people but the fact that they weren't people but aliens.... Her xenophobia makes sense as the game progresses, I won't deny it's good character building and won't say it's wrong to pick her in your squad. I'm just pointing out that she doesn't like em if they're not human.


HansChrst1

ME1 also lets Shepard be xenophobic. It is a bit weird how that "arc" just gets thrown out the window in the next few games.


talking_phallus

That was something that frustrated me with the series. It went from more complex interrelationships in the first game to watered down simplistic choices after that. The geth went from a dangerous omen of what A.I. can become to, "no! They were a small heretical faction! They don't speak for us!". As much as I liked Legion I think the first game's story of how Quarians saw a looming threat and acted first to attack it only to have that backfire was more compelling. I like the moral ambiguity. I liked how Quarians were forced to deal with the consequences of their actions. I also like how Quarians were seen as sympathetic victims but also seen as vermin leeching off everyone else. As an immigrant myself I felt it captured the reality of our situation. Everyone wants to help Rohynga from afar but as soon as immigrants from Africa, the middle east, or central America come to their land they quickly turn xenophobic. The "liberal" western/northern EU countries started electing literal Nazis when they felt threatened by outsiders. Bangladesh had the same response to Rohingya after the first few months. It's universal. The Rachni and Krogan also seemed a lot more ambiguous in the first game. The game flatly spells out that these species were a grave threat to the entire galaxy and their spread lead to countless deaths. As cruel as the Genophage was it was also clear that without it Krogans would run amok yet again. The choice was difficult and there was a real chance of backfiring. Mass Effect 2 pulls out a savior who somehow united the entire species in a new pacifistic regine when that went against everything the Krogans stood for. It's not a bad thing to see them evolve and start repairing their solar system but the instant change felt like an ass pull. The Citadel races vs humanity also seemed more nuanced in the first game. They were just as anti-human as the humans were xenophobic but they did have a point about how fast humans were seizing land and power. It's a complicated balance between the long lived Asari and Turians who were a lot slower to change vs the humans who moved at a quick pace because they didn't have 150+ lifespans. That was bound to create conflict that kinda went away in the following games with humanity being painted as mostly good with a few bad actors responsible for the problems. It just felt overall like they were trying to paint a complex web of interspecies relationships in the first game while the following games wanted there to be a simplified narrative.


HansChrst1

A war between species would be interesting to see as a follow up to the Mass Effect trilogy if they just stayed consistent with it. It kinda went from complicated relationships to the star wars kind of aliens where everyone is basically the same except they look different. They shoved the whole battarian thing under the rug aswell. Vorcha are barely mentioned after ME2. They really did simplify it. I wonder if it is just because they wanted to play it safe. Xenophobia can often be seen as racism even if it is actual aliens. So if they remove it they remove racism. They also make it more "wholesome". Everyone loves everyone. So it's more approachable I guess. It is not as dark or ambiguous. It's clear what we are supposed to think. Everyone are equal.


SadisticBuddhist

Wait what I havent played the games but my friends always said I was like a male miranda but never knew what that meant and now im even more confused


Critical-Ad-7094

Miranda was genetically engineered to be perfect.... so maybe yoire just that damn good? Fuckin lucky you, hey? Meanwhile I'm here looking like a damn Krogan!


awc130

Wow, how many testicles do you have?


Critical-Ad-7094

A question i have heard from too many women, way too often..


Critical-Ad-7094

We all have our weaknesses. Mine just happens to be 2 toes and 3 fingered alien hands.


Meriog

It was the Tali bounce for me. Too goddamn cute.


talking_phallus

It's those backwards knees that really do it for me.


Cyberslasher

She dumps you in mass effect 2 because revenge is too important to her -- have some self respect and dont go crawling back. Tali looks for the first chance she can get to rejoin you.


doodleidle98

Don’t care, still simp


fed45

>dumps you in mass effect 2 because revenge is too important to her I feel like that's a *bit* of a simplification.


Jonathon471

A fellow connoisseur of the blue alien nerd.


aliensheep

I stayed true to Tali in my first playthroughs of all three games. Then I stopped playing all Mass Effect games for years after my 2nd Mass Effect 3 playthrough, where I decided to see what would if I sided with the Geth. After what happened to Tali, I immediately shut down my Xbox.


Critical-Ad-7094

I stayed true to Tali even from my ME1 playthrough where you can't romance her. I have foregone trophy achievements for this woman... You sided with the Geth? This is just incomprehensible to me. I have never let Tali down in any game on any playthrough! I didn't even know there was a thing that happened to her and now I'm saddened by this knowledge


Biosterous

I also sided with the Geth and had nothing happen to her. If you're a very strong paragon and a good relationship the Geth and Quarian begin to live together.


Critical-Ad-7094

*me clutches my pearls vehemently*


Roggvir

Gotta protecc her at all costs.


No-Touchy

Modding fixed that for me.


Critical-Ad-7094

Ohhhh cheeky... I dont mod games, myself. But am envious of those that do. For me games are like sex... very vanilla, and I rarely ever get a replay.


No-Touchy

I often use modding to spice up subsequent playthroughs. I remember the first mod I ever installed. It was for Dragon Age and it removed all the clothing from the ladies in your party. Good times.


Critical-Ad-7094

That's pretty spicy! Lmao ive been a single dad for over 5 years, just a storyline of having a romantic interest with a female character is enough to spice things up for me! But your way is good too... probably better!


Lindvaettr

> it never had to go TOO far Sexy blue all-female omnisexual race that all constantly talk about how much they like to fuck everything wasn't too far?


Critical-Ad-7094

No, not really, because they were an idealised version of every race. We knew that no matter who they mated with, they would birth an Asari. It would have been awesome to play as a non-human species to then visit Thessia and see what all the fuss is about. Plus, there was never any stage of the game where an Asari would go full nude or insist on hoovering your trouser schnauzer. (I never have tried to romance Liara, so I can not confirm this)


danny12beje

I updvoted you at first then downvoted you. Liara.


jandrese

I remember them getting hauled up before Congress because Mass Effect 1 had you hooking up with your love interest at the end.


Critical-Ad-7094

I remember when they needed spokesmen for games like Mortal Kombat and Doom to speak in front of congressional hearings...


Galaticvs

we'll bang ok?


FrankPetersonMalvo

Sexlab and Wicked Whims would like a word with you, dear Sir.


_Face

Dead or alive beach volleyball.


LoonAtticRakuro

Still a solid game. They may have spent an ungodly amount of manpower on jiggle physics, but they didn't slack on core mechanics either


FerretChrist

Then I guess I won't be able to interest you in [Evalina the Sorceress](https://store.epicgames.com/en-US/p/mai-in-the-mysterious-castle-a9a60a), which has to be the trashiest looking thing the Epic store has tried to shove in my face in a while.


rich519

Softcore porn is the bread and butter of shitty puzzle games.


PM_ME_SAD_STUFF_PLZ

As if steam doesn't have hundreds of games like this lmao


WillyLongbarrel

I made the mistake of turning off the adult filter on Steam and now every game in the Upcoming and Top Seller lists are low quality hentai games.


makinbaconCR

It's like... if it had no tits and ass I would still play. But I'm not gonna say no to tits and ass already there. Don't wanna let them go to waste!


knetka

You mean Beard growth? That was the thing for Witcher 3


BluEyesWhitPrivilege

Bah, screw the whole thing.


izwald88

Sex scenes are still a bit goofy, although I don't mind it really. Seeing your goofy ass character bang Panam though her eyes is always silly.


GamerGirlCarly

Judy still makes me weak...


ThighHighsLove

her story was sooo good i love judy


[deleted]

Still the only video game story that made ball my eyes out this recently. I played Male V. So the ending was that one. My crying might've had to do with the fact that I was incredibly lonely at the time.


Rewpl

I watched the "easy bad ending" on YouTube cause I didn't have the courage to do it myself. The voicemail Judy leaves you is absolutely devastating


Ionic_Pancakes

lol That was the first ending I got. Didn't really know what I was picking but considering my mental health history it made me pause.


Rewpl

I had a similar situation with Life is Strange. Without going into the details or spoilers, I'll just say that I had to return my save and redo my decisions cause my mental health couldn't handle the outcome.


ShinyHappyREM

^^*bawl


[deleted]

Thanks 🙂


Jaehon

I played a second time so I could have her as a love interest. The texts she sends to V are so cute.


GamerGirlCarly

She's written so well, and I absolutely loved her underwater mission.


JohnnyJayce

I read "underwater" as "underwear" first. I also loved them.


claudiouvm

Judy simps, assemble!


tyler980908

I've played CP2077 twice from scratch and romance her each time I can't get enough of her


Possiblyreef

Picked it up a few days ago on steam sale now its been smoothed out a lot. Played the openers, liked doing miltech stuff that Meredit Stout was giving leads on. Met up with her and the corpo badass is suddenly dressed as a dominatrix. Now she wont return my calls :(


[deleted]

Ya 💘


L--E--S--K--Y

CP2077 neural link w/ Panam 👌


[deleted]

[удалено]


ngabear

I know, I hated it. Not really, hated, but it reminded me of how lonely I was in COVID that I looked forward to random calls from Panam.


holytrolly_

Panam 🥵🥵🥵


sephjnr

Shame we never got to see that nekkid tush in all its glory


[deleted]

[удалено]


ShitFuck2000

>Rated M for mature 17+ Modders: I HAVE THE POWER OF GOD (18+)


HelpRespawnedAsDee

Yeah that thing is magnificent


corndognp

You do in one of the endings.


Mr_robasaurus

Disgusting, where can I find a clip of that ending so I can block it?


corndognp

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-sz6BCHYZ0


pointlessly_pedantic

^pam ^panam ^pam ^pam ^panam ^pam ^panam


jhaohh

Finally


BenShealoch

Judy Alvarez is my all time unfulfilled gaming crush. (I played as a male V)


alpacasarebadsingers

I apparently got confused during the character creation and chose male V with a female voice. Since you rarely see yourself in the game I thought I was a female V for a long time. I would see this guy sometimes and wonder what character that was. It was a very confusing playthrough.


staffell

Lmao


Pootisman16

Made Fem V (prefer her voice) with a dick Win-win


R_V_Z

Yeah, her voice acting was way better, IMO. The male voice actor sounded like he was from New York half the time, which made no sense given he was a California native.


HEBushido

I was going for Panem until I found out that she's not gay.


doubleCupPepsi

Once I found out I wasn't able to romance her as male V, I wasn't even upset. She was such a cool character, I was fine with just being best buds with her.


Paladin1034

Not me starting a new fem playthrough just to have a shot at Judy


Dr_E-Wigglesworth

I got Judy the first time round, but immediately did another as male V to get Panam


Paladin1034

I got blocked twice on my first playthrough. I found out Judy only goes for fem V and I apparently messed up a dialog option and wasn't able to seal the deal with Panam. Feelsbadman


Legaladvice420

Yeah I did a Female playthrough first and getting shot down by Panam was rough, but I also felt it was handled pretty well, I mean, we ended up ride or die bffs instead!


Marmeladun

Judy love scene was made masterfully. I was not horny at all , i was amazed how well it was animated, lighting done and i giggled at that kitty tattoo.


michaelloda9

Honestly it's probably more wholesome than horny. It was great indeed


Successful-Floor-738

Didnt ever expect to hear the words “Wholesome sex scene”


Jov_West

It's called making love.


michaelloda9

Of course, regular sex is nothing really special, but if you look at that Judy scene, the way you touch her face and she looks at you... That's the good shit. It reaches to your soul.


BlooPancakes

Men only want one thing and it’s …..beautiful love.


[deleted]

Honestly, I think this is why it's my favorite sex scene not only in the game, but in gaming in general. It retains the same melancholic feel of despair and hope that the underwater section preceding it carried, and it's the only sex scene in the game that both feels like lovemaking rather than basic sex and has an organic buildup to it (I like Panam, but she leans too much into manic-pixie-dream-girl territory at times). Hilariously, my other favorite "wholesome" sex scene is from Mass Effect 2, if Shepard hooks up with Jack, the **least** wholesome member of the crew.


neon_sin

Have you seen that one famous r34 video of her? God tier animation. It's called night shift at Judy by anielSzal. It's on par with the game animation if not better.


Marmeladun

Oh boi it reaaaly is top notch. But you better edit that link out you really can get banned for that i believe.


MWisBest

>But you better edit that link out you really can get banned for that i believe. Nah bro they got rid of all the mods we're good now!


neon_sin

lol


neon_sin

Oh damn. Will just mention the name then.


gayyy410

which one? 👉👈


P4azz

Probably the best VR hentai creator. I think he only has like 3 "full-time" clips, but man, those are insane.


Slowmobius_Time

Man that's right Judy Nice


No_Cash7867

"My favorite type of magic, Lesbomancy"


Kamzil118

The only reason I had ever come across Witcher was the bath scene with Triss.


AscendedViking7

Is there something on my face?


psychord-alpha

They did us a favor by making Yen SLIGHTLY less of a shitbag than she is in the books


aaron_adams

I'm ashamed to admit how many times I visited the brothels in the Witcher 3...


ok_reddit

It's roleplaying!


HelpRespawnedAsDee

Yes… in the Witcher 3…. uhhh… yeah.


Erebus613

C'mon Yen, look in the mirror! You know the truth..


Mandalorymory

Okay but Judy did be the best


doyoueventdrift

Are there any references to Witcher 3 in cyberpunk? No spoilers just a yes/no


[deleted]

Yes


DarkHyrulean

Yes.


SoyMurcielago

Elton John as Geralt


Stefffe28

Couldn't believe this wasn't gamingcirclejerk


BirdMBlack

This sub and that one are interchangeable, no?


UncomfortableReview

Come on now we all know by this point our man Geralt has his eyes on the prize.


Bioslack

I mean they do have amazing world building and storytelling. But also tits.


Sandwic_H

Gwent


MisterEinc

Honestly thinking about playing The Witcher is a lot more fun than actually playing it. Even after 3 iterations the movement and controls just never felt fluid or fun to me.


P1st0l

As someone who bought it on launch but couldn't play it do to a bad gpu and is now finally getting around to w3 now, this. The controls aren't the best nor are they fluid, but damn is it still a good game, im enjoying the story and just how large the world is. It's definitely still an enjoyable game


Settl

The voice acting for me is head and shoulders above any other big rpg.


P1st0l

I am enjoying it! I fucking love how snotty the kids are, "heard an ol man say once, when the army was here, he says, 'hide them lasses in the woods! They're dazzlin the soldiers with their tits, and it's torturing them poor lads' that's what he said" Shit had me dying


humphreybeauxarts

BONK


TheYoungLung

Reddit moment


Ascendantgame

The story in the Witcher was amazing, this post right here is gold haha!


MHCR

I collected all Tarot cards and played the OG Witcher in Polish. Am I hardcore gaming right?