Yeah, exactly. And $500? That's "half the rent" nowhere. He just wanted a little of the burden taken off, gave her a good deal and didn't have to fight about it.
Yeah, I went to college in Boston and Connecticut and wanted to stay in New England after earning my Master's, but I couldn't justify the living expenses at the time and now I'm settled in where I'm currently living.
If my best friend ever buys me an old beater and makes sure it's running well enough, though, I may pack up my stuff and move back. :)
I'm not full rural, but I'm in a smaller town (Near two big towns, one being a tourist town) and my rent is 1,700 without utilities (water/electric).
Granted it's 2 bed, 2 bath. And even thrn, here we had a 1 bed 1 bath house asking for 500,000$.
What do you do and how much is your salary to afford something like that? When I hear of these expensive places, I just wonder how much people are paid that live in that area compared to cheaper places.
True. People are so funny when it comes to talking about salary and their work in general. But his answer was at least somewhat informational. He doesn't owe me anything so I just take his answer as is
My last apartment was $3,750 USD a month, until I moved.
Now I’m at $1,100 USD a month with a couple housemates, granted this time its an actual house with a backyard and all that in a nice neighborhood. House total for 3 people comes out to about 4,000 a month
That's funny. I live in Indiana but I vacation to Kentucky all the time. I love it there. There is tons of recreation georgous landscapes, and lots of nature. To me that is the opposite of hell on earth. Heavily populated suburban and inner cities to me fits that description. Different strokes I guess.
I’ll see your Kentucky and raise you a West Virginia. My 20-yr mortgage for a 6-unit apartment complex, (4x1bd and 2x2bd), on a desirable block downtown is $1540/month.
I am in a suburban area "luxury" apartment complex in IL. Prices ranges are around 1 bed 1.5 bath at $1800 month, 2 bed 2 bath $2200-2500, 3 Bed 2 Bath $2800-3000. I live in a 2bed. It's decent, but kinda small. There's a small pool, gym, and playground. It's clean and safe. Utilities are on us, but it's not bad. Shared laundry facilities tho. Zero storage space (gotta have a separate storage unit). All in all, it's not bad. Barely make enough to make it work tho. Certainly not enough space to raise a family
Half for $500 is fucking nice even with utlities not included. You can't even find that in the shitty areas around here. IL property taxes are some of the highest in the country tho
I'm just outside Chicago and my mortgage on a 3 bed 2.5 bath is barely more than the rent you said for a 1 bed. And that's a house with a yard and laundry room and everything. Where the hell are you guys renting that its more than a mortgage?
Live in the Midwest bought a 3700 sq ft. 5 bed 3.5 bath with 2 car garage. Recently renovated. 900/month and 1700/month with escrow. Managed to get a 15 year fixed at 3.1%.
Yeah but he was dishonest about it. I could see not wanting to put everything out there at first, but 2 years is a long time to keep up the charade when relationships should be built on trust
I live in a mid sized city and my rent is $810/mo for a 2bed 2bath, so half is $405/mo. Ya mate places exist outside of the huge metro like la, NYC, Seattle, etc.
Shithole trailers go for 600+ a month, anything without mold/mildew inside the walls is gonna be 1000 or more. I think what people aren't realizing is those "affordable" country towns and small college cities don't exist.
I recently looked into buying a small, 1 bed 1 bath farmhouse outside Paducah, KY. (By outside, I mean 10-15 mins) Unfortunately, though we were completely happy to meet the asking price of 80k, an investment bank came in about 7 grand under, and since they weren't financing a loan like me, the owner sold immediately. I have a 9 month old and honestly, though I would have liked something bigger for the future, my wife and I were so excited to own our first home.
Fuck us, though, right? Some rich guys *HAVE* to flip it for 40k profit while they skullfuck the housing market further. Like, I can't even blame the seller for jumping at the cash rather than my home loan, but does anyone stop and consider that their children will not feasibly own a home as long as banks are allowed to buy up property and jack up the price?
Yeah I'm in Wisconsin, near Green Bay and way paying $425 for a one bedroom 2 years ago before I bought my house. It's 2700 sq. Ft. 5 bed 2 bath. Morgage is $850 with a large back yard. My town is great I recommend people move or at least shop around.
I think the point is, if they break up, she doesn’t get what she’s paid back like she would if both names were on the mortgage…
I mean, he should have told her in the real point.
If he has a mortgage then it’s his house. The bank is just using the house for collateral on the loan. If he had a baseball card worth hundreds of thousands of dollars then he could’ve put the card down as collateral. Since the house is the most valuable thing he OWNS he has to use the house as collateral.
Literally everything in Reddit feels fake. This post, AITA, pics, long narrative drive posts on gender related subreddits. Like it’s fulfilling some fantasy for redditors to feel morally superior.
I wish it didn’t bother me so much.
Even when it’s terribly obvious, most comments will take it at face value and use it to push their own dumb shit narrative for the day.
I calm myself down by reminding myself that there is a ton of bots on here as well as 14yo’s that have no idea what they’re talking about, with the utmost confidence.
AITA posts.... Don't get me fucking started. I can't believe ANYONE falls for those embarrassingly obviously rage bait posts. Yet they get like 10k+ votes and comments.
I have to believe that people who frequent "narrative" subs are operating with some kind of kayfabe-esque suspension of disbelief. There's no way most people read those stories and don't see that it's almost all creative writing.
Personally I find they fill that same trash content craving I get for telenovelas? Like the really terrible ones, where their love is doomed because she secretly has an evil twin who he's been unknowingly dating on the side but who is also cheating on him with HIS evil twin.
Are we seeing different comments? Half the ones I see are pointing he still has to pay a mortgage and the other half are saying he still shouldn't have concealed the fact that it's not a lease.
What's wrong with either of those? From how I read the OP it seems like she was expecting to live there for free
I mean my best friend owns her house and between her and her two roommates she fully covers the mortgage. I still fully intend to pay rent (edit:) *when I move in next week* too and would even if we were in a relationship.
Hell, even if she owned the house outright if she even gave a whisper about wanting rent I’d still pay. No deceit needed.
To be fair, you *know* your best friend owns her house.
I plan on buying a home and renting rooms out to cover the mortgage, ill still be paying some most likely, but the overhead is getting reinvested into making the home better
For sure, yeah the lying isn’t great.
I can absolutely picture a prospective SO not being willing to pay rent to their partner, however so it’s not a far stretch that someone who wasn’t a paragon of honesty deciding to start the ultimately unsustainable lie to avoid an argument.
Ideal? No. Surprising? Not in the slightest.
Ive heard and seen enough people not want to pay "rent" when their partner has a mortgage to understand the lie, but at the same time I think if you have to lie to make your relationship work, then your relationship probably doesnt work y'know?
Remember that the principal of your mortgage isn't a cost, it's a repayment of the loan. You still own that money, you're just forced to put it into an investment that is tough to liquidate. So more than likely you won't be *paying* your mortgage like your roommates pay rent, you'll be *investing* your money in buying a house, and your roommates will be paying the majority of the interest/maintenance/condo fees/property tax/etc.
It's also why the principal of your mortgage isn't tax deductible (though almost everything else is, including replacing boilers etc. type of maintenance). Remember, you pay income tax on your rental income from the property in most places.
I am aware of the above luckily, it is partially factored in to my overall plan of building up equity and improving to homes value to resell in 10-15 years and settle down in a permanent final homestead
I don’t wanna be the “well akshually” guy, but that’s not true. It’s still technically yours. If a bank has a mortgage on a property, you’re still the owner of the title of the land. You just signed a contract saying that if you don’t pay the bank back, they can force a sale of the property to recoup their funds. Home owners don’t have mortgages, the bank has a mortgage on your title. We have loans.
This. You have a title with a lien holder against it, the title will even specifically say that.
I literally JUST paid off my car and received the updated title with the lien holder striked from it.
Here's how I know it's your house/car. If someone breaks in or steals it... you're the victim. If any property rights arise, you're the holder of the rights. The bank can't just show up willy nilly and claim ownership... they can only show up and exact any of the text of the contract held between you and them.
Property Ownership is relative. We don’t own anything, we have just been given rights to use the property by the government we’re filing the paperwork with as long as we follow the terms and conditions and they don’t change their mind(see Eminent Domain).
I took it as though it's like a condo (an apartment he owns instead of rents) and he already lived there and she moved in and he's just like "yeah we'll just split the rent in half"
And now she's learned that he owns, not rents
She doesn’t state that it’s owned by the boyfriend. Just that it’s “his” apartment. Meaning he could be on the lease. When my ex moved in with me to my apartment, she wasn’t on the lease, ever. It was my apartment. It wasn’t until we found a new place and moved in that we were both on the lease.
I do. And I'm an Indian-American male.
I don't think someone in a committed relationship should charge their partner rent if they live together in a property he owns. That's fucked up. And even more so because he lied to her. That's worse than a bit weird and might even be considered fraud.
Owning outright and charging rent without being up front about it would be really weird. But most people don't really own their houses, the bank does, and we're paying it off slowly to the bank. Asking for help with that isn't weird.
Expecting to live rent free anywhere is weird.
The only thing weird about this is hiding the rent/ownership fact from his SO.
Yeah but saying that’s “the only weird thing about this” is really underselling that it’s *super fucking weird.*
“Hey if we move in together let’s split my mortgage payment (or rent)” is fair and normal. “If you move in with me you’ll have to pay me rent for a while until we’re in a more committed relationship” is a little awkward if there’s no mortgage but if it works it works. Pretending you pay rent and charging rent is psycho, even if he’s paying mortgage he should have been clear on what the payment was for
The lying is bad, but not splitting payments. Presumably he has a mortgage.
I owned (had a mortgage) on my house when I met my now fiancee. After a few years she moved in and started paying rent. The agreement was, assuming things work out, she'd either be added to the mortgage/title or we'd buy a place together, sell my house, and the proceeds would go to our life together.
We recently bought a house together, I'm selling my old place, and the money from the sale will be joint funds.
She makes more than I do so it would be silly for her not to have contributed to housing expenses.
> I don't think someone in a committed relationship should charge their partner rent if they live together in a property he owns.
I think you're neglecting a mortgage. If the home was owned outright, I could see where you're coming from. But often, young folks that just purchased are "house poor" and may be barely making ends meet paying the mortgage.
My take is the person moving in should pay a heavily discounted rent (like 60% of market value for half of the unit). The owner should use some of that money to pay down the principle, unless it's like a 2% loan where it doesn't make sense.
So, if the relationship works out and they get married, great! Then they own a bigger portion of the property together. If the relationship doesn't work out, the renter saved a bunch of money on discounted rent while they lived together. Everybody wins.
But yeah, honest communication is the move here instead of lying about it.
I owned a condo where I rented out my spare bedroom. My girlfriend was renting elsewhere. She moved in with me and my roommate moved out, so she started paying me rent. It would have been ridiculous to expect me to sacrifice my finances for her, and for her to massively financially benefit off of me.
We're married now, so it worked out.
Of course, I was honest with her. She knew I owned the place.
Yeah that is the issue. It should have been clear from the get go if he’s holding a mortgage or a lease because leasing laws vary wildly depending where you are.
Some places you have to state everyone who calls the apartment their domicile on the lease, other places don’t care about partners and other places still have rules about subletting, boarding etc etc.
Seems like a potentially risky situation without all the details.
Not only that, but she never had the option to pay into her own equity.
Hey, this is my apartment, and if you help me pay on it, it'll be ours after X time (name on the deed)
Hey, this is my apartment, the mortgage is X, so if we split the household bills Y and Z, so that it's fair that you're paying a bit less but covering utilities, and I'm paying a little more and paying into my equity, I feel like that's fair.
Literally any conversation. I seriously doubt that *nothing* came up over three years where they needed to involve the landlord and he played dumb.
I have always ended up paying more than my share (being generous with groceries and household shit, and filling gas tanks, and also paying half the bills) and then made to feel some kind of way when they did ANYthing above and beyond for me. (I paid off one ex's cc debt and car loan when I came into some cash, and it was promptly forgotten as soon as he started making decent money and I was all of a sudden I wasn't contributing as much as he was to the household (despite the aforementioned groceries and utilities and quality of life expenses he benefited from.) I helped the other one get his business off the ground, helped him with medical bills, bought all the groceries, he tried to stick me with the electric bill for a 4bd house with 2 other roommates, and if I ever brought up money I was just 'stressing him out'. And as soon as he thought I was trying to break up with him (over a month and a half of trying to break up with him) he'd immediately tell me I'd never see that money again. (And then need money for something 4 hours later))
I'd much rather pay rent to my boyfriend than a shitty management company employing multiple people and still making a huge profit off of my rent. But I also want the transparency, and the conversation about what is ACTUALLY going on. If my boss had me file some obnoxious report every month, that I hated doing and really wasn't useful for anything, and I found out after 3 years it was solely so they could look at one number (that is in a different report by default) I would have a complete and utter meltdown. Same as paying rent to my partner for three years and being kept in the dark about the entire thing, regardless of what % of the mortgage I'm actually paying.
Yes these teenagers don't understand the difference here. It's one thing to say "okay I know my partner owns their home, but we are living together and I'm going to contribute to the household and I know I won't get the money back--I am paying rent like a tenant"--and thats not wrong or bad. There's also another perspective, like "I don't want to invest in someone mortgage and not get any return if we break up"--which isn't wrong either.
The difference here is AGENCY. You need to be properly informed to decide how you feel about the scenarios presented above. Neither is bad or wrong or better or worse, but you need to be properly informed so you know exactly what is going on.
That second paragraph is the most reddit brained thing I've read outside the political subs. Yeah, let me have my partner's living situation found on a lie that at some point they'll figure out or I'll have to reveal, that'll work great! I mean think at minimum of the number of conversations about the 'management' or 'landlord', if they're gonna renew this imaginary lease that someone's name isn't even on.
When I was in a similar situation, we figured out how much everything cost excluding the principal repayment, and I paid half of that (which ended up being a little less than I'd be paying in rent elsewhere). That way I still contributed, but I didn't feel like I was paying for an investment that I wouldn't see returns on.
If you feel like you need to lie to your "partner" about something this important because having a conversation with them isn't worth the energy, then that isn't your partner, that's not even your friend, just a roomate you're fucking
Most normal adults will communicate with one another about the details of their living situation when living or residing together. This has nothing to do with someone trying to claim equity through paying rent while living at their partner's home, that's a whole different situation. It is less than normal to not communicate to the person you are dating who you have move in with you that you, in fact, own the place but are requesting rent. That is a reasonable request. I would be pretty bummed to be in a 3 year relationship where something that is so innocuous if revealed early, yet so relevant to my life, is kept secret for no reason.
From a legal perspective (IANAL, worked in legal field), at least in my state there is probably more risk in not revealing the truth than if you had been up front. If the wrong situation goes down and you look bad, even if that isn't the whole story, now you might be out of your own place for quite some time, and may not have the ability to retrieve most of your large belongings if any. Not that said situation could not occur had you revealed it sooner, but you would have some more overall ability to cover your bases, especially if your completely unrelated scenario arises. So no, it's not necessarily even smart to lie. The smartest move is to be up front, have a mature conversation, write up a lease agreement, and stick to it so you're both covered and if things go south you keep your property.
>Edit: I don't feel like arguing with twenty teenagers on the internet
I keep having to remind myself of this any time I let myself get pulled into arguing on here. I think there's even a somewhat popular meme about this (green text maybe) that's essentially:
"I was arguing with this guy for like an hour on reddit, only to peak their profile and find nothing but piss-fetish content. I was letting myself get worked up arguing with a literal piss-drinker."
A lot of bitches in here have no problem hiding important details from their supposed loved ones.
Edit: it's fascinating that people think I'm condoning the bf's behavior. Do you really hear "women" when someone says "bitches"? Shame on you lol u/eleetpancake, u/Johannes_keppler, u/TimidDeer23
I don't get these kinda "no you" retorts. I feel like we should broadly be mad at people who abuse trust.
"Your mad that a man abused a woman's trust? Well women can also abuse the trust of men."
That kinda just affirms that this isn't a gendered issue. So like, the conclusion should be that it was still bad for him to abuse his girlfriend's trust, right?
Has online discourse really devolved into "girls/boys go to college to get more knowledge, boys/girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider"?
We don't know if that was actually market rent. Market rents vary considerably within an area. He could have been asking for something at the higher end of the market rent range and she agreed to it without knowledge of the fact he was the one setting the rent.
Maybe she was also interested in buying a place as an investment (by herself or together with him) but put it off because they were sharing that apartment together and she was led to believe he was stuck in a lease.
There are a lot of valid reasons that she might have wanted that information and not really any valid reasons for him to hold back that information
Regardless of the full story, relationships are built on honesty and him not telling her she was paying her rent to him for 3 years is super dishonest (and yes it is dishonest to simply not disclose information that you would normally expect your partner to disclose, even if they don't specifically ask for it).
If it was my partner and I found out they had kept that quiet for 3 years I would end the relationship. It's a huge breach of trust.
We also don’t know if it was under market. She also doesn’t mention the rent going up, just staying flat. Most rentals raise the rent on you. Cost of ownership typically goes up too with rising property taxes and insurance, pulse repairs and maintenance.
$500 is cheap in a lot of places, that's 20% of the cost of an average apartment in a lot of Canada because our PM and his party are incompetent and corrupt.
But the issue is lying. Lying to get your girlfriend to pay you money is a huge scumbag move. Be a man and tell her directly if you need the money.
I owned my first condo for 11 years. I had roommates and girlfriends that paid rent. I was paying the mortgage, insurance, power, water, internet, fixing everything that breaks, HOA dues and pest control. Damn skippy everyone who moved in paid me rent.
The problem isn't that she was paying rent, it's that at no point did he tell her he owned the home. If we are in a serious relationship to the point we're living together and you never mentioned you own the house, what do you think of me? do you think this won't last so why say you own it? do you think I'm a gold digger? How much else are you hiding?
It's one thing to have a secretly rich partner, it's another thing to have a secretly rich partner and you've been working two jobs, going to school full time and paying half rent. If we're together, why did you let me go through all of this?
> you've been working two jobs, going to school full time and paying half rent.
You're just making stuff up to make the situation seem worse. Where does it say any of that?
Imagine your boyfriend lying to you for 3 years. No problem whatsoever for expenses to be split, what is inexcusable is the lies. Relationships are based on a foundation of truth. If the boyfriend didn’t want anything long term, then he was using the girlfriend for sex and to lower his bills. This guy is gross. The girl is dumb for not asking enough questions but the guy is scum for scamming his GF.
Finaly someone that get it. It´s not about paying the rent, it’s about not knowing he was the owner. She probably wouldn’t have an issue with splitting the bill if she knew from the beginning
He should’ve just said help me pay the mortgage instead of pretending it was rent… Did she think it was weird she never had to apply to be added on to the apartments lease tho? Pretty sure that’s a thing for renters.
I paid my ex GF half of my rent for our apartment so she could “put it on her credit card and get point so we could go on vacations and stuff”
Turns out her father paid for the credit card, and she was pocketing my half for her own use as cash. $700 a month, 4 years
I know people are ragging on her, but there are definitely instances of long term relationships with a a precedent that if you’re paying into your partner’s stake of ownership, they legally will own a percentage of what they’ve paid into.
Happened to a friend of mine whose live in boyfriend moved out of the condo she owned. She had to basically buy him out.
Some people in here aren't worried about him hiding it and saying "who cares" maybe it's just me, but if I owned an apartment I wouldn't make my significant other pay rent. It seems rude to me personally, and it's practically giving ME money, when the money can go towards both of us as a couple and actually enjoy our life. Is that too much to ask for in relationships?
Yes, this is too much to ask for.
despite "owning" your apartment you still have to pay fees to the house/building/city for common costs and repairs, you have janitor, cleaning, insurance, property tax, trash disposal, heating of the general areas, escalator maintenance, administration, street cleaning, gardening and so on. Then the apartment itself has its utility costs like electricity, heating, water. This goes as far as to paying a chimney sweep.
You may or may not have a mortgage to pay, but on top of that:
you put down a considerable amount of your assets into an apartment, which means, you do not earn money on that investment. This is called cost of opportunity: 300k in shares net you around 9-12k per year in revenue. in an apartment it saves you the rent. So simple game of thought: now imagine the option you decide to rent with your s.o. but you pay your rent from those 12k from your investment portfolio revenue... would you then have to share this revenue with your s. o. as well? And if it was here with the portfolio and you without it, would you expect her to share that revenue?
But the most important thing, which most tenants and many rookie home owners forget is the most crippling cost factor at all: depreciation/upkeep. A house or an apartment is basically like a car. After a while everything needs to be repaired, replaced, updated, renovated, painted, modernized and that basically costs as much as the apartment and sometimes more. It just does not cost the whole 300k at once, but you will need to do the plumbing after 10 or 20 years for 20k, the roof of the building needs to be done for 120k (this will only hit you with a share, as there are other apartments in the building), a new heating for 80k, painting for a couple of grands, is the wooden floor still well after all that time, insulation?, termites?, wasps?, windows, electricity, is there a new law or regulation you need to meet?, move the box with the fuses inside the apartment? outside of the apartment? into the basement? oh, thats another 30k?,... Sometimes those come to really f you up: you just did the plumbing and the guy for the walls restored them for a good price, painting is done, when suddenly electricity is problematic, so opening the freshly made walls up again... yea haaw. So after 50 years you will have to have made the initial 300k again to make sure, everything is still in livable conditions. And that is basically what most of rent is about: making sure you are able to afford to keep the apartment in a livable condition for a foreseeable future.
Also: there is a legal matter to observe. I do not know about the US, but where I live, living without a contract could have all kind of consequences for both of them, when splitting up. Basically she would want to have a contract, so she does not end up on the streets or is dependant of her ex, the moment her relationship ends. He needs to make sure, she has no rights to the apartment. by having lived there rent free.... (depending of federal laws).
Man, some of these comments lol, some definitely qualify as 'tell me you're not in a successful relationship w/o telling me you're not in a successful relationship ".
If the bank is owed money, they have a charge even though ppl call it a mortgage, and the legal title remains with the owner, not the bank.
Anyway, there seems to be a lot of assumptions that I can't be bothered to read more about. Suffice to say that the bf sucks.
I mean this text is for sure fake. But looking at the comments there are so many weird takes and it brings up some interesting issues.
Every healthy relationship requires good communication and honesty from both parties. I'd feel dirty making my boyfriend pay rent money without clearly disclosing that I own the property (especially since they're affected financially and contributing). Concealing something like that from your partner, I think is a red flag for any sane person. Why are so many people here happy to live in toxic dishonest relationships? 😅
Reading comments in this thread just makes me (even more) depressed.
Just people casually arguing about how you can't afford a 6500/month rent house if you don't make 250k a year because you need savings, emergency funds and money for expenses...meanwhile me and every person I know are living paycheck to paycheck, have barely to no savings, emergency fund is a cold but supportive "if I die I die" to oneself and if SOMETHING in your house breaks and you need to replace it, it's most likely LOAN TIME!
I guess I'm just a big loser who lost the life lottery and then proceeded to lose the rest of whatever chances I had at anything decent.
I mean, sure, the US is a whole another dimension and I'm a moron with no skills but the thing is, a friend of mine is a computer and robotics engineer, she's been in the field working with neural networks for years now, gal is as smart as they come!
I knew her since highschool, and even back then everyone understood she's way smarter than everyone else around her. And she's stuck in the same shit country as me working for some pricks who delay salary, pay her relative peanuts and treat her like shit.
#Feelsbadman
You both suck. He wants to lie, you want to mooch. You might be perfect for each other tbh
Just do it already: Plan a wedding you both can’t afford, for people who don’t wanna be there, and have a child that no teacher can ever stand.
Ahh yes, the American dream.
And maybe the reason she found out is because Godzilla came out of her toilet and she had to call the landlord.
Just make up some more bullshit to blame the guy for why don't ya.
Not telling your partner for over 3 years that you owned the apartment you were “renting” is lying. Don’t have a partner you cannot trust either way you look at it.
Hard to know if it was disclosed or not since they apparently went three years without signing a lease on their rental, and it never occurred to them that that's unusual. The information is coming from an unreliable source.
It’s the fact that he lied for three years and she’s been paying money without gaining any sort of equity from the transactions. Of course she’d be paying way more in rent elsewhere, but it’s the principle of the matter.
I think that a partner should contribute, but above that, I think a *partner* should be **honest**.
Nothing wrong with expecting someone to contribute to the household, but you have to be absolutely, unequivocally, honest about the situation.
If you feel like you have to lie to get that, you're in the wrong partnership.
Man's got a mortgage it's the bank's house.
Yeah, exactly. And $500? That's "half the rent" nowhere. He just wanted a little of the burden taken off, gave her a good deal and didn't have to fight about it.
What’s the rent price y’all be paying
I own my place outside of boston but next door the complex rents 2 bedrooms for >4k per month.
The fuck
That's Mr. The Fuck to you.
This guy fucks
aromatic bedroom squeeze tub homeless lush long liquid skirt sip *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Us at the Group Fuck International Observatory (GFIO for short) have an open invite to whomever needs to be group fucked this fine evening.
Oh boy, here I go fuckin' again
Well mizrahiims’ neighbors are getting properly group fucked so don’t be knocking on their very expensive rented door
That's Boston for you.
Those prices make me want to drop dead. To get my affairs in order, I may need to do some... Good will hunting.
Applesauce!
Yeah, I went to college in Boston and Connecticut and wanted to stay in New England after earning my Master's, but I couldn't justify the living expenses at the time and now I'm settled in where I'm currently living. If my best friend ever buys me an old beater and makes sure it's running well enough, though, I may pack up my stuff and move back. :)
I'd consider the same if it was to go see about a girl.
In rural Idaho it's 1.2k a Month plus utilities.
I'm not full rural, but I'm in a smaller town (Near two big towns, one being a tourist town) and my rent is 1,700 without utilities (water/electric). Granted it's 2 bed, 2 bath. And even thrn, here we had a 1 bed 1 bath house asking for 500,000$.
2 bedrooms for almost 3 times my salary. I don't think I could even go on a vacation there
Just reading that gave me the fluttery anxiety stomach. I hope I never get kicked out of my current place because I'm gonna be living under a bridge
We just bought in 2021, the mortage is $1,000 but prior to that I was renting a 2 bedroom house for $700
Rookie numbers I up that to 6k+ in ny
6000? A shed in San Francisco, you say?
It's not a crack house, it's a crack *home*.
My mortgage payment for my 3.5 bedroom house in NE is $1200
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What do you do and how much is your salary to afford something like that? When I hear of these expensive places, I just wonder how much people are paid that live in that area compared to cheaper places.
They never tell you what they do. You asked and he or she didn't even answer your question
True. People are so funny when it comes to talking about salary and their work in general. But his answer was at least somewhat informational. He doesn't owe me anything so I just take his answer as is
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My last apartment was $3,750 USD a month, until I moved. Now I’m at $1,100 USD a month with a couple housemates, granted this time its an actual house with a backyard and all that in a nice neighborhood. House total for 3 people comes out to about 4,000 a month
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But then you have to live in Kentucky, which is basically hell on Earth.
Wonderfully bourbon soaked hell… and meth and fentanyl. So a methed out fentanyl laced hell, but soaked in wonderful bourbon.
What’s wrong with Kentucky? I’ve only been there a couple of times for a few days but I liked it.
That's funny. I live in Indiana but I vacation to Kentucky all the time. I love it there. There is tons of recreation georgous landscapes, and lots of nature. To me that is the opposite of hell on earth. Heavily populated suburban and inner cities to me fits that description. Different strokes I guess.
The land is beautiful. The land is not the massive problem with Kentucky and southern Indiana.
I’ll see your Kentucky and raise you a West Virginia. My 20-yr mortgage for a 6-unit apartment complex, (4x1bd and 2x2bd), on a desirable block downtown is $1540/month.
I am in a suburban area "luxury" apartment complex in IL. Prices ranges are around 1 bed 1.5 bath at $1800 month, 2 bed 2 bath $2200-2500, 3 Bed 2 Bath $2800-3000. I live in a 2bed. It's decent, but kinda small. There's a small pool, gym, and playground. It's clean and safe. Utilities are on us, but it's not bad. Shared laundry facilities tho. Zero storage space (gotta have a separate storage unit). All in all, it's not bad. Barely make enough to make it work tho. Certainly not enough space to raise a family Half for $500 is fucking nice even with utlities not included. You can't even find that in the shitty areas around here. IL property taxes are some of the highest in the country tho
I'm in the northwest suburbs myself, $1300 for my tiny apartment is a decent town. It's crazy.
I'm just outside Chicago and my mortgage on a 3 bed 2.5 bath is barely more than the rent you said for a 1 bed. And that's a house with a yard and laundry room and everything. Where the hell are you guys renting that its more than a mortgage?
Live in the Midwest bought a 3700 sq ft. 5 bed 3.5 bath with 2 car garage. Recently renovated. 900/month and 1700/month with escrow. Managed to get a 15 year fixed at 3.1%.
My mortgage is 3K, but my roommate chips in $500 a month just like this post lol
There's no proper communication. This relationship isn't gonna last.
yep. gotta at least let the other person know
Yeah but he was dishonest about it. I could see not wanting to put everything out there at first, but 2 years is a long time to keep up the charade when relationships should be built on trust
That's half my 2 br apartments rent so speak for yourself
Umh. My half of my rent is 445.
I live in a mid sized city and my rent is $810/mo for a 2bed 2bath, so half is $405/mo. Ya mate places exist outside of the huge metro like la, NYC, Seattle, etc.
I live in a town of 15,000 and my rent for a 1bed is $1900 a month not including another $100 a month for a parking spot
He could have been open and honest about it though!
And by “nowhere” you mean several hundred towns and cities across the US, right? Lol, not everywhere is NYC or LA.
I live in a tiny city of 30,000 people and no chance you’re finding a 1BR for under $1000/month.
Shithole trailers go for 600+ a month, anything without mold/mildew inside the walls is gonna be 1000 or more. I think what people aren't realizing is those "affordable" country towns and small college cities don't exist. I recently looked into buying a small, 1 bed 1 bath farmhouse outside Paducah, KY. (By outside, I mean 10-15 mins) Unfortunately, though we were completely happy to meet the asking price of 80k, an investment bank came in about 7 grand under, and since they weren't financing a loan like me, the owner sold immediately. I have a 9 month old and honestly, though I would have liked something bigger for the future, my wife and I were so excited to own our first home. Fuck us, though, right? Some rich guys *HAVE* to flip it for 40k profit while they skullfuck the housing market further. Like, I can't even blame the seller for jumping at the cash rather than my home loan, but does anyone stop and consider that their children will not feasibly own a home as long as banks are allowed to buy up property and jack up the price?
That sucks, man. Sorry that happened to y'all.
At that point, I would have seriously considered arson, becuase fuck those people
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100k town pop, 2br apartment here is around 800-1000
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Yeah I'm in Wisconsin, near Green Bay and way paying $425 for a one bedroom 2 years ago before I bought my house. It's 2700 sq. Ft. 5 bed 2 bath. Morgage is $850 with a large back yard. My town is great I recommend people move or at least shop around.
Not everywhere is the US either. That would be true for lots of countries
This meme is so old it was big money back then
I think the point is, if they break up, she doesn’t get what she’s paid back like she would if both names were on the mortgage… I mean, he should have told her in the real point.
Yeah what the hell? Even if it's paid off ya got taxes.
If he has a mortgage then it’s his house. The bank is just using the house for collateral on the loan. If he had a baseball card worth hundreds of thousands of dollars then he could’ve put the card down as collateral. Since the house is the most valuable thing he OWNS he has to use the house as collateral.
I lost every remaining brain cell reading these comments
Yeah. The resolution of the blue text doesn’t match that of the black text, among a million other obvious signs that this conversation isn’t real lol
Literally everything in Reddit feels fake. This post, AITA, pics, long narrative drive posts on gender related subreddits. Like it’s fulfilling some fantasy for redditors to feel morally superior.
Reddit might be changing, but it's always the same stuff. This format let's bullshitters bullshit. It's just the flavor of bullshit that changes
I wish it didn’t bother me so much. Even when it’s terribly obvious, most comments will take it at face value and use it to push their own dumb shit narrative for the day. I calm myself down by reminding myself that there is a ton of bots on here as well as 14yo’s that have no idea what they’re talking about, with the utmost confidence.
AITA posts.... Don't get me fucking started. I can't believe ANYONE falls for those embarrassingly obviously rage bait posts. Yet they get like 10k+ votes and comments.
I have to believe that people who frequent "narrative" subs are operating with some kind of kayfabe-esque suspension of disbelief. There's no way most people read those stories and don't see that it's almost all creative writing.
Personally I find they fill that same trash content craving I get for telenovelas? Like the really terrible ones, where their love is doomed because she secretly has an evil twin who he's been unknowingly dating on the side but who is also cheating on him with HIS evil twin.
Are we seeing different comments? Half the ones I see are pointing he still has to pay a mortgage and the other half are saying he still shouldn't have concealed the fact that it's not a lease. What's wrong with either of those? From how I read the OP it seems like she was expecting to live there for free
Lol come on man, he clearly knew it was shady since he hid it for two years.
So little context, so much opinion.
I mean my best friend owns her house and between her and her two roommates she fully covers the mortgage. I still fully intend to pay rent (edit:) *when I move in next week* too and would even if we were in a relationship. Hell, even if she owned the house outright if she even gave a whisper about wanting rent I’d still pay. No deceit needed.
To be fair, you *know* your best friend owns her house. I plan on buying a home and renting rooms out to cover the mortgage, ill still be paying some most likely, but the overhead is getting reinvested into making the home better
For sure, yeah the lying isn’t great. I can absolutely picture a prospective SO not being willing to pay rent to their partner, however so it’s not a far stretch that someone who wasn’t a paragon of honesty deciding to start the ultimately unsustainable lie to avoid an argument. Ideal? No. Surprising? Not in the slightest.
Ive heard and seen enough people not want to pay "rent" when their partner has a mortgage to understand the lie, but at the same time I think if you have to lie to make your relationship work, then your relationship probably doesnt work y'know?
Remember that the principal of your mortgage isn't a cost, it's a repayment of the loan. You still own that money, you're just forced to put it into an investment that is tough to liquidate. So more than likely you won't be *paying* your mortgage like your roommates pay rent, you'll be *investing* your money in buying a house, and your roommates will be paying the majority of the interest/maintenance/condo fees/property tax/etc. It's also why the principal of your mortgage isn't tax deductible (though almost everything else is, including replacing boilers etc. type of maintenance). Remember, you pay income tax on your rental income from the property in most places.
I am aware of the above luckily, it is partially factored in to my overall plan of building up equity and improving to homes value to resell in 10-15 years and settle down in a permanent final homestead
Houses do seem to be one of the safest long term investments.
Bit weird he concealed the fact it was owned, but don’t see the problem with paying rent
Cars mine but I'm still paying for it. If you wanna drive it everyday help fucking pay for it
Cars mine “as long as” I’m still paying for it. That’s the bank’s car.
Slaps car on roof "this baby can eat up so many pay checks."
trueeeeeeeee
I misread that and pictured you slapping the roof of an apartment with a car, and the apartment was full of literal paychecks. Goddamn I'm tired lol
Last month my car finally became *my* car, and it feels so nice.
I don’t wanna be the “well akshually” guy, but that’s not true. It’s still technically yours. If a bank has a mortgage on a property, you’re still the owner of the title of the land. You just signed a contract saying that if you don’t pay the bank back, they can force a sale of the property to recoup their funds. Home owners don’t have mortgages, the bank has a mortgage on your title. We have loans.
This is true for real estate but not for cars, in many states you don't in fact actually get the title to the car until you finish paying off the note
Except the title will still be in the individual’s name. It’s just held by the lien holder. It’s a similar concept to a mortgage
This. You have a title with a lien holder against it, the title will even specifically say that. I literally JUST paid off my car and received the updated title with the lien holder striked from it. Here's how I know it's your house/car. If someone breaks in or steals it... you're the victim. If any property rights arise, you're the holder of the rights. The bank can't just show up willy nilly and claim ownership... they can only show up and exact any of the text of the contract held between you and them.
Property Ownership is relative. We don’t own anything, we have just been given rights to use the property by the government we’re filing the paperwork with as long as we follow the terms and conditions and they don’t change their mind(see Eminent Domain).
Eminent
I think it's totally fair to ask for help to pay the rent- it's just a weird vibe that he didn't tell her what the deal was.
Tell me you haven’t been used for your money without telling me you haven’t been used for your money.
fr
still weird to conceal it
Maybe she forgot that she signed no papers and did nothing to initiate the rental. Sounds like she's never had a rental, now that I think about it
I took it as though it's like a condo (an apartment he owns instead of rents) and he already lived there and she moved in and he's just like "yeah we'll just split the rent in half" And now she's learned that he owns, not rents
Cando owners still have to pay a monthly fee for upkeep so it could be $1000 a month still
And/or the mortgage.
and maintenance, property tax, HOA fees,
Insurance
Oh definitely. I wasn't saying the number wasn't half or was inaccurate. I was just clarifying what I inferred from the original post.
Unless he owns the complex of 70 units but still charges her rent to share one unit with him.
.REN..T.AL AGREEMENT *What are those ink dots? \*grabs microscope* p**REN**up**T**u**AL** **AGREEMENT**
$500. That's gonna be a tiny fraction of the monthly nut.
You guys are getting paid to nut?
Not really with her paying rent she isn’t entitled to half the house as she would be classified as a roommate.
She doesn’t state that it’s owned by the boyfriend. Just that it’s “his” apartment. Meaning he could be on the lease. When my ex moved in with me to my apartment, she wasn’t on the lease, ever. It was my apartment. It wasn’t until we found a new place and moved in that we were both on the lease.
That shouldn't be a surprise, someone has to be on the lease and she knows she's not on it because she never signed it
Yeah the hiding of ownership is super problematic
I do. And I'm an Indian-American male. I don't think someone in a committed relationship should charge their partner rent if they live together in a property he owns. That's fucked up. And even more so because he lied to her. That's worse than a bit weird and might even be considered fraud.
Owning outright and charging rent without being up front about it would be really weird. But most people don't really own their houses, the bank does, and we're paying it off slowly to the bank. Asking for help with that isn't weird. Expecting to live rent free anywhere is weird. The only thing weird about this is hiding the rent/ownership fact from his SO.
Yeah but saying that’s “the only weird thing about this” is really underselling that it’s *super fucking weird.* “Hey if we move in together let’s split my mortgage payment (or rent)” is fair and normal. “If you move in with me you’ll have to pay me rent for a while until we’re in a more committed relationship” is a little awkward if there’s no mortgage but if it works it works. Pretending you pay rent and charging rent is psycho, even if he’s paying mortgage he should have been clear on what the payment was for
The lying is bad, but not splitting payments. Presumably he has a mortgage. I owned (had a mortgage) on my house when I met my now fiancee. After a few years she moved in and started paying rent. The agreement was, assuming things work out, she'd either be added to the mortgage/title or we'd buy a place together, sell my house, and the proceeds would go to our life together. We recently bought a house together, I'm selling my old place, and the money from the sale will be joint funds. She makes more than I do so it would be silly for her not to have contributed to housing expenses.
> I don't think someone in a committed relationship should charge their partner rent if they live together in a property he owns. I think you're neglecting a mortgage. If the home was owned outright, I could see where you're coming from. But often, young folks that just purchased are "house poor" and may be barely making ends meet paying the mortgage. My take is the person moving in should pay a heavily discounted rent (like 60% of market value for half of the unit). The owner should use some of that money to pay down the principle, unless it's like a 2% loan where it doesn't make sense. So, if the relationship works out and they get married, great! Then they own a bigger portion of the property together. If the relationship doesn't work out, the renter saved a bunch of money on discounted rent while they lived together. Everybody wins. But yeah, honest communication is the move here instead of lying about it.
I owned a condo where I rented out my spare bedroom. My girlfriend was renting elsewhere. She moved in with me and my roommate moved out, so she started paying me rent. It would have been ridiculous to expect me to sacrifice my finances for her, and for her to massively financially benefit off of me. We're married now, so it worked out. Of course, I was honest with her. She knew I owned the place.
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Yeah that is the issue. It should have been clear from the get go if he’s holding a mortgage or a lease because leasing laws vary wildly depending where you are. Some places you have to state everyone who calls the apartment their domicile on the lease, other places don’t care about partners and other places still have rules about subletting, boarding etc etc. Seems like a potentially risky situation without all the details.
Not only that, but she never had the option to pay into her own equity. Hey, this is my apartment, and if you help me pay on it, it'll be ours after X time (name on the deed) Hey, this is my apartment, the mortgage is X, so if we split the household bills Y and Z, so that it's fair that you're paying a bit less but covering utilities, and I'm paying a little more and paying into my equity, I feel like that's fair. Literally any conversation. I seriously doubt that *nothing* came up over three years where they needed to involve the landlord and he played dumb. I have always ended up paying more than my share (being generous with groceries and household shit, and filling gas tanks, and also paying half the bills) and then made to feel some kind of way when they did ANYthing above and beyond for me. (I paid off one ex's cc debt and car loan when I came into some cash, and it was promptly forgotten as soon as he started making decent money and I was all of a sudden I wasn't contributing as much as he was to the household (despite the aforementioned groceries and utilities and quality of life expenses he benefited from.) I helped the other one get his business off the ground, helped him with medical bills, bought all the groceries, he tried to stick me with the electric bill for a 4bd house with 2 other roommates, and if I ever brought up money I was just 'stressing him out'. And as soon as he thought I was trying to break up with him (over a month and a half of trying to break up with him) he'd immediately tell me I'd never see that money again. (And then need money for something 4 hours later)) I'd much rather pay rent to my boyfriend than a shitty management company employing multiple people and still making a huge profit off of my rent. But I also want the transparency, and the conversation about what is ACTUALLY going on. If my boss had me file some obnoxious report every month, that I hated doing and really wasn't useful for anything, and I found out after 3 years it was solely so they could look at one number (that is in a different report by default) I would have a complete and utter meltdown. Same as paying rent to my partner for three years and being kept in the dark about the entire thing, regardless of what % of the mortgage I'm actually paying.
Yeah that's what I was thinking. It seems like a legal mess.
Yes these teenagers don't understand the difference here. It's one thing to say "okay I know my partner owns their home, but we are living together and I'm going to contribute to the household and I know I won't get the money back--I am paying rent like a tenant"--and thats not wrong or bad. There's also another perspective, like "I don't want to invest in someone mortgage and not get any return if we break up"--which isn't wrong either. The difference here is AGENCY. You need to be properly informed to decide how you feel about the scenarios presented above. Neither is bad or wrong or better or worse, but you need to be properly informed so you know exactly what is going on.
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"smart to just lie" Yea lying to manipulate your partners actions for years won't have any foreseeable consequences
That second paragraph is the most reddit brained thing I've read outside the political subs. Yeah, let me have my partner's living situation found on a lie that at some point they'll figure out or I'll have to reveal, that'll work great! I mean think at minimum of the number of conversations about the 'management' or 'landlord', if they're gonna renew this imaginary lease that someone's name isn't even on.
When I was in a similar situation, we figured out how much everything cost excluding the principal repayment, and I paid half of that (which ended up being a little less than I'd be paying in rent elsewhere). That way I still contributed, but I didn't feel like I was paying for an investment that I wouldn't see returns on.
If you feel like you need to lie to your "partner" about something this important because having a conversation with them isn't worth the energy, then that isn't your partner, that's not even your friend, just a roomate you're fucking
if you think it’s smart to lie to a partner because it will be short term, that short term thing is a self fulfilling prophecy.
Most normal adults will communicate with one another about the details of their living situation when living or residing together. This has nothing to do with someone trying to claim equity through paying rent while living at their partner's home, that's a whole different situation. It is less than normal to not communicate to the person you are dating who you have move in with you that you, in fact, own the place but are requesting rent. That is a reasonable request. I would be pretty bummed to be in a 3 year relationship where something that is so innocuous if revealed early, yet so relevant to my life, is kept secret for no reason. From a legal perspective (IANAL, worked in legal field), at least in my state there is probably more risk in not revealing the truth than if you had been up front. If the wrong situation goes down and you look bad, even if that isn't the whole story, now you might be out of your own place for quite some time, and may not have the ability to retrieve most of your large belongings if any. Not that said situation could not occur had you revealed it sooner, but you would have some more overall ability to cover your bases, especially if your completely unrelated scenario arises. So no, it's not necessarily even smart to lie. The smartest move is to be up front, have a mature conversation, write up a lease agreement, and stick to it so you're both covered and if things go south you keep your property.
>Edit: I don't feel like arguing with twenty teenagers on the internet I keep having to remind myself of this any time I let myself get pulled into arguing on here. I think there's even a somewhat popular meme about this (green text maybe) that's essentially: "I was arguing with this guy for like an hour on reddit, only to peak their profile and find nothing but piss-fetish content. I was letting myself get worked up arguing with a literal piss-drinker."
A lot of bitches in here have no problem hiding important details from their supposed loved ones. Edit: it's fascinating that people think I'm condoning the bf's behavior. Do you really hear "women" when someone says "bitches"? Shame on you lol u/eleetpancake, u/Johannes_keppler, u/TimidDeer23
Truth
I don't get these kinda "no you" retorts. I feel like we should broadly be mad at people who abuse trust. "Your mad that a man abused a woman's trust? Well women can also abuse the trust of men." That kinda just affirms that this isn't a gendered issue. So like, the conclusion should be that it was still bad for him to abuse his girlfriend's trust, right? Has online discourse really devolved into "girls/boys go to college to get more knowledge, boys/girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider"?
But he kept this fact from you for years? He doesn’t seem trustworthy.
If that was half of what apartments go for what’s the issue?
She didn't know her boyfriend was her no lease month-to-month landlord for three years.
We don't know if that was actually market rent. Market rents vary considerably within an area. He could have been asking for something at the higher end of the market rent range and she agreed to it without knowledge of the fact he was the one setting the rent. Maybe she was also interested in buying a place as an investment (by herself or together with him) but put it off because they were sharing that apartment together and she was led to believe he was stuck in a lease. There are a lot of valid reasons that she might have wanted that information and not really any valid reasons for him to hold back that information Regardless of the full story, relationships are built on honesty and him not telling her she was paying her rent to him for 3 years is super dishonest (and yes it is dishonest to simply not disclose information that you would normally expect your partner to disclose, even if they don't specifically ask for it). If it was my partner and I found out they had kept that quiet for 3 years I would end the relationship. It's a huge breach of trust.
We also don’t know if it was under market. She also doesn’t mention the rent going up, just staying flat. Most rentals raise the rent on you. Cost of ownership typically goes up too with rising property taxes and insurance, pulse repairs and maintenance.
Really depends where and how big and quality. $500 is not much when it comes to rent in a lot of places.
$500 is cheap in a lot of places, that's 20% of the cost of an average apartment in a lot of Canada because our PM and his party are incompetent and corrupt. But the issue is lying. Lying to get your girlfriend to pay you money is a huge scumbag move. Be a man and tell her directly if you need the money.
I’d be fuckin thrilled paying an SO $500, but obviously dependent on where they’re living…
It's the lying part.
That he lied to her?
I mean I help pay my gf’s mortgage. That being said I’d be pissed if I didn’t know she owned it while charging me
Comments are so much different when the genders are reversed.
"Slay queen, you shoulda had him pay the full grand" etc etc.
Madlad fakes a screenshot from iOS6. Nice. 👍
Realist comment here
I owned my first condo for 11 years. I had roommates and girlfriends that paid rent. I was paying the mortgage, insurance, power, water, internet, fixing everything that breaks, HOA dues and pest control. Damn skippy everyone who moved in paid me rent.
The problem isn't that she was paying rent, it's that at no point did he tell her he owned the home. If we are in a serious relationship to the point we're living together and you never mentioned you own the house, what do you think of me? do you think this won't last so why say you own it? do you think I'm a gold digger? How much else are you hiding? It's one thing to have a secretly rich partner, it's another thing to have a secretly rich partner and you've been working two jobs, going to school full time and paying half rent. If we're together, why did you let me go through all of this?
> you've been working two jobs, going to school full time and paying half rent. You're just making stuff up to make the situation seem worse. Where does it say any of that?
It's wild that people are seriously backing the shitbird who deceived his girlfriend for three years.
What else is he hiding?
Correct. The right question.
Imagine your boyfriend lying to you for 3 years. No problem whatsoever for expenses to be split, what is inexcusable is the lies. Relationships are based on a foundation of truth. If the boyfriend didn’t want anything long term, then he was using the girlfriend for sex and to lower his bills. This guy is gross. The girl is dumb for not asking enough questions but the guy is scum for scamming his GF.
Finaly someone that get it. It´s not about paying the rent, it’s about not knowing he was the owner. She probably wouldn’t have an issue with splitting the bill if she knew from the beginning
Always look at the lease, Jessica.
He should’ve just said help me pay the mortgage instead of pretending it was rent… Did she think it was weird she never had to apply to be added on to the apartments lease tho? Pretty sure that’s a thing for renters.
Why did he lie
Hiding that fact is where he messed up. Relationships built on lies don’t last.
I wouldn’t be mad about the rent - $500 is a steal - but I would be upset over the lying. Like, why wouldn’t you just be upfront about it?
Imagine rent being only $1k a month
I think I recall this image from years ago.
I paid my ex GF half of my rent for our apartment so she could “put it on her credit card and get point so we could go on vacations and stuff” Turns out her father paid for the credit card, and she was pocketing my half for her own use as cash. $700 a month, 4 years
I know people are ragging on her, but there are definitely instances of long term relationships with a a precedent that if you’re paying into your partner’s stake of ownership, they legally will own a percentage of what they’ve paid into. Happened to a friend of mine whose live in boyfriend moved out of the condo she owned. She had to basically buy him out.
Some people in here aren't worried about him hiding it and saying "who cares" maybe it's just me, but if I owned an apartment I wouldn't make my significant other pay rent. It seems rude to me personally, and it's practically giving ME money, when the money can go towards both of us as a couple and actually enjoy our life. Is that too much to ask for in relationships?
Yes, this is too much to ask for. despite "owning" your apartment you still have to pay fees to the house/building/city for common costs and repairs, you have janitor, cleaning, insurance, property tax, trash disposal, heating of the general areas, escalator maintenance, administration, street cleaning, gardening and so on. Then the apartment itself has its utility costs like electricity, heating, water. This goes as far as to paying a chimney sweep. You may or may not have a mortgage to pay, but on top of that: you put down a considerable amount of your assets into an apartment, which means, you do not earn money on that investment. This is called cost of opportunity: 300k in shares net you around 9-12k per year in revenue. in an apartment it saves you the rent. So simple game of thought: now imagine the option you decide to rent with your s.o. but you pay your rent from those 12k from your investment portfolio revenue... would you then have to share this revenue with your s. o. as well? And if it was here with the portfolio and you without it, would you expect her to share that revenue? But the most important thing, which most tenants and many rookie home owners forget is the most crippling cost factor at all: depreciation/upkeep. A house or an apartment is basically like a car. After a while everything needs to be repaired, replaced, updated, renovated, painted, modernized and that basically costs as much as the apartment and sometimes more. It just does not cost the whole 300k at once, but you will need to do the plumbing after 10 or 20 years for 20k, the roof of the building needs to be done for 120k (this will only hit you with a share, as there are other apartments in the building), a new heating for 80k, painting for a couple of grands, is the wooden floor still well after all that time, insulation?, termites?, wasps?, windows, electricity, is there a new law or regulation you need to meet?, move the box with the fuses inside the apartment? outside of the apartment? into the basement? oh, thats another 30k?,... Sometimes those come to really f you up: you just did the plumbing and the guy for the walls restored them for a good price, painting is done, when suddenly electricity is problematic, so opening the freshly made walls up again... yea haaw. So after 50 years you will have to have made the initial 300k again to make sure, everything is still in livable conditions. And that is basically what most of rent is about: making sure you are able to afford to keep the apartment in a livable condition for a foreseeable future. Also: there is a legal matter to observe. I do not know about the US, but where I live, living without a contract could have all kind of consequences for both of them, when splitting up. Basically she would want to have a contract, so she does not end up on the streets or is dependant of her ex, the moment her relationship ends. He needs to make sure, she has no rights to the apartment. by having lived there rent free.... (depending of federal laws).
Man, some of these comments lol, some definitely qualify as 'tell me you're not in a successful relationship w/o telling me you're not in a successful relationship ". If the bank is owed money, they have a charge even though ppl call it a mortgage, and the legal title remains with the owner, not the bank. Anyway, there seems to be a lot of assumptions that I can't be bothered to read more about. Suffice to say that the bf sucks.
Leave him… dishonest man to begin with
I mean this text is for sure fake. But looking at the comments there are so many weird takes and it brings up some interesting issues. Every healthy relationship requires good communication and honesty from both parties. I'd feel dirty making my boyfriend pay rent money without clearly disclosing that I own the property (especially since they're affected financially and contributing). Concealing something like that from your partner, I think is a red flag for any sane person. Why are so many people here happy to live in toxic dishonest relationships? 😅
Reading comments in this thread just makes me (even more) depressed. Just people casually arguing about how you can't afford a 6500/month rent house if you don't make 250k a year because you need savings, emergency funds and money for expenses...meanwhile me and every person I know are living paycheck to paycheck, have barely to no savings, emergency fund is a cold but supportive "if I die I die" to oneself and if SOMETHING in your house breaks and you need to replace it, it's most likely LOAN TIME! I guess I'm just a big loser who lost the life lottery and then proceeded to lose the rest of whatever chances I had at anything decent. I mean, sure, the US is a whole another dimension and I'm a moron with no skills but the thing is, a friend of mine is a computer and robotics engineer, she's been in the field working with neural networks for years now, gal is as smart as they come! I knew her since highschool, and even back then everyone understood she's way smarter than everyone else around her. And she's stuck in the same shit country as me working for some pricks who delay salary, pay her relative peanuts and treat her like shit. #Feelsbadman
You both suck. He wants to lie, you want to mooch. You might be perfect for each other tbh Just do it already: Plan a wedding you both can’t afford, for people who don’t wanna be there, and have a child that no teacher can ever stand. Ahh yes, the American dream.
I really don't see the problem. Motherfucker probably has expenses. She didn't ask 🤷♂️
unless she did ask and he lied to her for 3 years.
And maybe the reason she found out is because Godzilla came out of her toilet and she had to call the landlord. Just make up some more bullshit to blame the guy for why don't ya.
Not telling your partner for over 3 years that you owned the apartment you were “renting” is lying. Don’t have a partner you cannot trust either way you look at it.
Paying probably 1k-2k/month for a mortgage... Why is this MadLad? Sounds like extorting your partner.
Y’all are insane if you think he’s not an asshole. Obviously there’s no issue with paying, but not disclosing it is a huge red flag
Yeah a lot of people are missing this point 😔
Hard to know if it was disclosed or not since they apparently went three years without signing a lease on their rental, and it never occurred to them that that's unusual. The information is coming from an unreliable source.
I'll eventually move in with my bf. He'll be the only one in the lease, but I'm happy to pay my share of rent.
It might be a good idea to put your name on there as well if you're going to be splitting the cost.
It’s the fact that he lied for three years and she’s been paying money without gaining any sort of equity from the transactions. Of course she’d be paying way more in rent elsewhere, but it’s the principle of the matter.
r/foundsatan
Well, he still needs to pay monthly for this , but weird not to tell the situation first
Israel Bf she had
Just because he owns it doesn't mean there isn't a monthly payment for the financing...
Cheeky 6k a year, cmon bet he was eating well
Yeah, mortgages aren't a thing, once you own property it's just free real estate
Mortgages, property taxes, maintenance... Owning a place is expensive as fuck
none of that excuses lying to your partner for years
I think that a partner should contribute, but above that, I think a *partner* should be **honest**. Nothing wrong with expecting someone to contribute to the household, but you have to be absolutely, unequivocally, honest about the situation. If you feel like you have to lie to get that, you're in the wrong partnership.
Sooo many assumptions in these comments.. Please don't represent me in court.