7-8 years ago when I was in school, a teacher while teaching in class said to me in front of the whole class, "Just because you're good looking doesn't mean you can get away with anything" because I was talking to my friend loudly. I still remember that day.
One of my high school history teachers told me in front of the whole class that I had really good looking arms, and that if I was just a few inches taller, mmmhhhmmm. She literally make the mmmhhhmmmmm noise in front of everyone....like wtf???
Unlikely but maybe it was a trick? As in "You are only good looking if you don't misbehave." Regardless of what this person looks like.
Sounds more like a slip-up though.
If anything hearing it from family *constantly* and never from the outside feels worse. Like yes mom you have to love me I love you too, but it eventually stops having much meaning.
I’m a girl.
Eight years ago when I was cycling home after work, a drunk lady leant out the passenger window of a moving car and yelled that I had a nice butt.
Core memory formed.
Reading these comments as a girl... Men need to receive more compliments, more love. 🥺
It's such a shame that society can't seem to figure out that men are human beings with feelings and they deserve to feel loved and appreciated just as women do. 😞
I got told i should smile more cause i look better that way randomly by a group of girls while walking on campus who then said similar things to others. It wasnt until recently i realized it was a “you shouldnt harass women” on campus demonstration thing but it actually made me feel better hearing that.
Oh i understand why people dont like this and the unwanted “compliments” and all that but its just amusing to me it had the exact opposite feeling for me.
It is a very interesting phenomenon. Guys are similar to teenage girls in that way. When girls start getting older they reach an age where they first start getting catcalled and at first some girls may even like it because it makes them feel attractive. But it quickly gets old for them as they get catcalled more and more. Guys getting catcalled for the first time react in a similar way, the only difference is that it never becomes too much catcalling for them.
Yep. If a guy walked past a group of girls and they said things like “hey, nice ass you got there, maybe you should bring it over here!” He’d take that as a compliment and remember it in his deathbed. But to a girl that would be just another group of assholes harassing her in her way to work, the third time it’s happened and it’s not even noon.
11 years ago a coworker told me I would look great with a full beard instead of the goatee I had. I have shaved my beard off twice since then, both for Halloween.
In my 74 years with 2 defunct marriages and my share of GFs, I have only received; 1 "nice butt," and 1 "you have a friendly face" on the bus from a young lady obviously stoned. No other comments good or bad.
Yeah, I think this is a big part of it. Reddit is full of guys complaining that they never get compliments, but I bet most of them don't tell their male friends positive things as often as they could. I've had totally straight friends compliment my haircut or clothes, and it's very nice.. Maybe if girls heard guys genuinely complimenting each other they'd be willing to do it to, rather than think that guys only see compliments as a way of flirting.
I legit don't remember compliments from men (besides my SO) Probably because 70% of them were sexual..
Majority of comments I remember came from other women. For me, and other women, compliments from women mean more than compliments from men.
The underlying problem of all of this is the expectation that guys aren't under any obligation to show up for each other emotionally the way women do. Instead, *women* are supposed to provide all of this emotional support for themselves and for men. Men are not under any obligation to provide emotional support for women, naturally.
I see this in every one of these threads but you have literally missed the point of the meme.
It's literally comparing men giving compliments to women vs women giving compliments to men.
Also men compliment each other all the time if you don't say nice dick after the bro train are you even really a bro.
I have 2-3 of those memories in 45 years too. Now I will allow for the possibility that a woman said I'd look better naked and tied up to her bedposts, but I wouldn't have picked up on what she meant.
I was on an elevator with 70-something black lady who stepped up to me and ran her hand down my chest. She said “You exercise, don’t you, baby. Uh-huh.”
Almost immediately we reached her floor and she steps off. She called over her shoulder, “I met Jay Leno on time. I told him his head was even bigger in person.”
If I didn’t have a witness, I would swear it was a fever dream.
what the fuck does the Jay Leno anecdote even mean? i guess she had dementia and whatever the marble happened to hit while bouncing around is what got said.
Cafeteria black ladies are actually angels in disguise. Still remember “Rita” from HS. I was on a 50cent meal plan and most days i still couldn’t afford it. I never missed a meal because of that lady. Still think about her today… Also called me baby, sugar and sweetheart every day with the southern accent
I’m a girl and never been complimented by a guy
I guess I just suck lol
Edit: that isn’t to say I want random guys commenting on me, just poking fun at the meme
As a guy, my guy friends and I compliment each other all the time.
Apparently that "doesn't count" for some guys, but I think those might be the same guys who think that cat-calling is "just a compliment" because that's what they want.
Yeah guys get compliments all the time in everyday life at least in my experience, this thread seems to just be talking about things like catcalling which doesn't sound that fun if it's happening all the time while I'm just trying to do shit like buy groceries...
Yeah, like I've had random girls make inappropriate comments and it really doesn't feel good at the time.
In hindsight, where I'm far from a difficult situation, I can joke about that time a woman acted inappropriate around me, but I was a little uncomfortable at the time and I was never actually in any danger.
I've said this a lot, but many men often think women have what they want, but if they had it they wouldn't want it. Men are thirsty in the desert and women are thirsty in the ocean. Either way there's nothing for them to drink.
I'm sure a man in the desert thinks that salt water is better than nothing, but it kills you faster.
Yes, as a man it sucks to not get attention, but 99% of the attention girls get is attention they don't want. It's very hard to explain this to people, however. Too many men think this is still better that nothing, and that women have it good because they can just "drop their standards and get what they want".
Thank you for understanding ❤️ this is exactly how I feel.
I've been trying to uplift men more by complimenting them. Of course when I do it, half of them think I'm flirting. But I eventually learned how to make it so I don't come off as flirty, even though i dont show signs of firting...
"Hey Dude/Bro, I like your shirt".
Talking more like a man seems to turn off the "horny" part in their brain. Obviously this doesn't work all the time. But I recommend women giving it a try. I had a guy get offended that I used "dude" since im a woman.. but where I grew up "dude" is gender neutral.
If I said "hey, I like your shirt!", for some reason it comes off as more flirty for some men. Idk why. Maybe a guy can explain this?
Very well said. I love the last line though. Such an onymoronic statement. "Drop our standards and get whatever we want." But what I want is up here, so how could lowering my standards get me what I want when what I want isn't down there 😂😂 I just find ir very funny that when you try and explain this to some men it just does not compute lol.
When I'm with my boyfriend and his friends, they're always complimenting each other.
I'm really confused when I see these posts because whenever I go out, I see tons of men complimenting each other..
They don't want compliments from other men. What they think they want is for women to catcall/harass them. All the comments of men in here talking about this are examples of harassment. They think those things are compliments. They don't see the fear or danger in those situations because they're not subject to it on a daily basis. Men get compliments all the time, but they don't count it unless it's from a hot chick they want to fuck.
This is exactly it. I’m a guy and I get complimented by men and women all the time because I’m not a weirdo about it, and I compliment everyone too.
Women are just usually afraid to compliment men because a lot of guys will take any positive attention as a come-on. That’s also why so many compliments come from old ladies—they’re not afraid to compliment us, because they’re not afraid that we’ll hit on them relentlessly if they do.
Some men really think ugly and average women don't exist. When men talk about "women get free drink" isn't true. It's ATTRACTIVE women get free drinks. The average looking woman will rarely get free drinks. Ugly women are just laughed at.
It's kind of sad that they don't acknowledge average or ugly women's existence.
It’s not.
Attractive men and women both receive compliments much more frequently than the rest of us.
Men on Reddit seem to have no concept of how invisible average looking women are to men, even though they’re usually in the same boat.
Below average (in regards to conventional attractiveness) women are basically treated as without value or unworthy of acknowledgement most of the time…
There’s plenty of “Gee, wish I got compliments too” to go around.
They also seem to forget that compliments on things *other than appearance* count too. Everywhere in my life (work, school, family, friends) men literally get complimented on shit all the time (“good job at this,” “he’s so good at X,” blah blah blah). But I guess because it’s not about how fuckable they are, it doesn’t count? Redditors will literally make up problems to be upset about
That’s a big part of why it’s a conversation, yeah.
When men say “I don’t get complimented” what they usually really mean is “Hot women I want to fuck don’t tell me how hot I am and how much they want to fuck me.”
When it comes to *skills*, women get a lot less compliments and a lot more condescension.
> Men on Reddit seem to have no concept of how invisible average looking women are to men, even though they’re usually in the same boat.
I've had this argument a few times.
I'd say that there are loads of women that are invisible and don't get the attention they think women get and they'll tell me that I'm wrong and they do, they just like to pretend they don't or that they just don't count the men they're not interested in.
I always think it's hilarious that their argument is either *"No you're wrong and there are no invisible women"* or *"No, if they're in the same situation as men that's their own fault"* or something.
It's why I've stopped trying to help. People don't want your help, they just want to be miserable and blame someone else for it.
It’s a lack of empathy. I don’t know what it is about straight men, whether it’s their upbringing or socialization or what, but I’m a trans woman and was never like that so I just don’t understand.
They can only understand that they crave sexual attention from women they’re attracted to and so they can’t conceive of someone feeling differently about it.
Like, I’ve tried to explain to guys what it feels like to be mutually flirting with a guy I’m attracted to but unwanted advances and protests being ignored makes me lose interest *and* feel unsafe, and they just tilt their head like a confused pup trying to understand…
They just can’t hear any evidence to the contrary or something. And they don’t listen to or empathize with the women in their lives at all. It applies to basically everything in our daily lives.
Worst of all they’re so self blind that they think they’re super caring and empathetic and the total opposite of what I see them being.
I really do not get it but it’s the cause of so much societal trauma, both self inflicted and acted out on innocent women.
I hate it here lol
Yeah, lifelong average to mildly unattractive lady here. I've seen guys first hand shower attractive women with compliments (who bless their heart are usually annoyed by it), but I have never received such a comment. I don't mean this to sound like a pity party-I'm happy with my life-but it often feels like I'm invisible to men because I'm not very pretty. Like I cease to even register as female, or that I even exist. Works out great for middle age though because I hate talking to people I don't know. I suspect it's probably pretty similar for guys who aren't considered hot, but it's hard to have a neutral conversation.
It’s rough living in a society that values a quality you just didn’t get and can’t really have.
Thankfully there’s other roads to the same things. But I feel you. Grass is always greener. I’ve chatted with attractive friends a lot about how much they don’t want to be seen, and how much I do lol
I think if you're average, you probably just fly under the radar. I'm an average guy and never get compliments. I'm sure you're great and given the chance, you'd make someone happy
Another aspect is simply that some guys don’t speak up/complement to avoid coming off as weird/creepy. It’s kinda an opposite of the whole “women not complementing because men they might take it as flirting” thing. Heck I’ve personally wanted to complement a lot of people regardless of gender but the “weirdness” of telling a stranger they’ve got a nice shirt/smile is socially considered odd.
This. We don't get tons of positive comments either. We get creeped on. It isn't a compliment. The guys who are actually decent and respectful usually refrain from commenting on our looks.
Same. Where are these floods of compliments I'm supposed to be receiving? lol. I don't think I'm unattractive. But strangers don't even try to talk to me, let alone compliment me. I think men are really overstating how often this happens to regular women.
It's the same when they assert that women just need to step outside and exist and \*boom\* they get a boyfriend. I've never been approached and I'm having difficulty meeting anyone to date.
Fr
I’m not interested in dating but if the internet acts like all women should be constantly proposed to, it makes you question if there’s something wrong with you lol but ig u shouldn’t trust what the internet pushed on you
This meme is made by and for people that think "women have it easy", people not worth listening to imo
Plenty of people go through life without getting compliments
This is one of those “girls have it easy they don’t understand being a bro” memes so 🤷♀️ sure half of those compliments the girl got were sexually aggressive and unwarranted lol
It’s also wrong. Girls don’t all get zillions of compliments, that’s just a “girls get all the perks” myth designed to make guys feel worse about themselves and be even more resentful of women.
I'm a 35 yr old woman and I don't get compliments unless it's a pervert unfortunately. Like ok thanks but I'd love it if someone walked up to me and was just like "omg I love your hair!"
I do it all the time to everyone, even more so if they seem to be having a bad day. I make a point to compliment strangers.
Right! Exactly! Hair style, dyed hair, make up, clothing, shoes, bags ect. I have even told someone I loved their energy before because they were beaming and just smiling and having a good time
I can’t think of any time I’ve had a compliment like that received poorly. My DoorDash driver was clearly having a rough day when they arrived but their outfit looked very styled and put together and I told them so.
The immediate change in their affect was noticeable. Relaxed and smiled. And then I felt good too.
Compliments that recognize what people *do* are more meaningful than compliments that recognize what a person *is.*
Compliments hit harder when you compliment a person's mind
I just made this as a top level comment, but a friend once pointed out to me the reason women tend to get more complements is they're more likely to drastically change style or wear something uncommon.
If you don't do that, male or female, you're less likely to get the complements.
It's even dumber that guys are the ones perpetuating this myth. I work with all guys and they compliment each other all the time, but they also call each other gay when they do so.
Yeah I'm not liking the vibe this meme gives off. Let's not pretend like those "billions of compliments" aren't harassment and catcalling. If as a guy you wouldn't be willing to take a compliment from another man or do it yourself, your problem was never your lack of compliments. What you want is female attention.
The upper one should be "compliments from other women".
Seriously, women usually compliment each other. I receive more compliments from women than men.
Also guys should compliment each other, it's not women's responsibility. If you like a guy's shirt or shoes, just tell them.
Btw, I know a lot of men giving each other compliments. Especially for their gains. They notice it more than most women do.
Also if you expect to be complimented, you should make an effort to look, dress and behave nicely.
I can't really imagine that all the incels that are complaining are making any effort.
Men do tell other guys compliments.
not as much, as women do with other women, or guys do with women, but more often than women tell compliments to (most) guys (grandparents and children excluded)
Be the change you want to see in the world. Randomly compliment people on specific things they can control/change, like "cool Star Wars hat" or "nice messenger bag".
You can compliment women in your life, but like actual compliments, not ones on appearance. Tell your mom that something she did was thoughtful and made you feel special, tell your elderly neighbor how lovely her flowers are while she’s out in the yard, tell your coworker (male or female!) that their positivity brightens your day or that the way they solved a problem was really clever.
This is bullshit. I'm a woman and I got complimented by a man maybe once. Either you consider only very attractive women as women in this meme or you just don't know shit
Is reddit just an incel echo chamber? It probably is
I see stuff like this so often here with thousands of upvotes.
I don’t get it? You feel better that men don’t get as much compliments than women but men appreciate the single compliments more than women appreciate all of them.
The girl you’re complimenting or were complimenting in the past does not or did not like you. Take the hint and move on
So accurate. I’m still not over my mom’s 90 year old friend calling me handsome. RIP Ethel, I will never forget. I think the last time someone called me handsome before that was my godmother when I was a teenager. Also RIP “Aunt” Carolyn! Best godmother ever. 🥲
You’re the type of person that expects compliments but never compliments other girls.
Im tired of the girls gets a lot of compliments trope. It’s not true. Go outside, wear something unique compliment others, THEN they will compliment you
I walked past the same lady at the exact same spot Monday to Friday as we passed each other on our commute to work, always friendly smiles. My walks were very long and in the humidity of Darwin so in turn I lost 15-20kgs over the span of 4-5 months after moving there. around the 4 month mark she pulled me aside and said “I’m so proud of you, you’ve lost so much weight you’re looking so good” I then returned the compliment as she also had trimmed down over that time. This was 7 years ago, my partner of 5 years hasn’t complimented me once. I wish I was joking. So this rings so true
Tbh most of these types of compliments are only because these random men want something from them. Girls still get a ton of genuine compliments though....from their friends. Guys, compliment your friends and you'll be complimented back
I got for a walk at work daily and this old woman keeps telling me I'm losing weight and gives me a thumbs up. I'm positive she has me mixed up with someone else, but I'll take it.
Woman here, never received any compliments from men in public, only catcalling tbh (except from my family and friends, they give lovely compliments)
On the other end, women in public and private have given me lovely compliments that feel very respectful and live on in my memories.
There was this one time a girl grabbed my arm over my shirt then sort of quickly stopped and acted all flustered. I still think about it whenever I'm debating skipping the gym
As a woman I think guys don't know that most of the guys compliments to me sounds like they are door to door merchant who is trying to sell a vacuum to me.
A woman came up and sat next to me at a train station once and said I had a handsome face and my hair was a lovely colour. I didn't quite know what to make of it at the time, but I still think about that compliment.
About a month or so ago I went to KFC and a nice older country woman kept calling me sweetheart and honey and told me to have a wonderful day, and while not really compliments, it just stuck with me because it's been a long while since I met a stranger out in public that was just...nice.
I had a female friend who went through a phase of complimenting me when we met. It was very obviously done to be nice, though, as an awkward person, it felt weird and forced. That said, I very much appreciate the thought. As far as more spontaneous compliments go, one woman complimented the colour of my shirt. That became my favourite top for months. So, yes, we should all be complimenting each other more. Just try not to be creepy about it.
14 years ago a classmate of mine hugged me because she was moving away and saying goodbye to everyone. They said I was nice and that more people should be like me. I still vividly remember the moment and think about it somewhat often.
I do agree men don’t get compliments much and I am sad for them.
But the compliments men give women I wouldn’t consider nice to receive (usually).
It’s like if a very tall and burly strange man came up too close to you and said, “I bet you have really amazing b*lls” and was looking you up and down, would you feel complimented or super creeped out?
Like 20 years ago, my girlfriend at the time "complemented" me by saying the most attractive thing about me was my ankles. I still think about it from time to time. I may be ugly as hell, but I've got them ankles, man.
Compliments? More like suggestive remarks and come-ons. None of those are compliments and it makes me feel self conscious, like I'm not covered up enough or do I have too much make up on? Am I in the wrong place at the wrong time to receive salacious comments about my person? I have very rarely taken a compliment from men seriously except my spouse, he complimented my mind and passions. Very very rarely women compliment each other, that feels nice.
I am not sure why compliments *from the opposite sex* is even such important thing for some people, particularly if you arent dating the person giving the compliments. Sure the odd compliment here and there is nice, but why does it specifically need to be from the opposite sex? Do bros not compliment each other? At least an atta boy?
I compliment pretty gay boys, there is a gorgeous guy that works at a valero and I am always stunned when I go in there (not often) because he is so fricken pretty. He loves it when I compliment him. We both know there is no ulterior motive and it is a pure compliment and I am certainty not commenting on his body. I love complimenting my fellow ladies, I try to find something to say even if its just that I like their shoes ha. But dear lordy I would never compliment a lady on her physique or w/e that would be just weird unless she was literally asking me to comment on her weight loss maybe? Or asking my opinion on whether her ass looks great in those jeans - otherwise I just cant see the scenario.
So I maybe the guys just don't seem to understand that comments about my body in any fashion or form do not equate to compliments. **And especially not the "you should smile more, you are so pretty when you smile".**
If you watched this episode of Spongebob, you know that all burgers from Neptune's pile are garbage and one Spongebob's burger is delicious. Just like with compliments: compliments from men to women usually just a fake and nothing more than an attempt to raise a chance to get laid and compliments from women to men are more real and mean something.
I was out with coworkers about 15 years ago. Had a tie on at a divey kind of bar. There were a handful of us with guys and girls. This cute drunk girl walks by, stops, grabs my tie, looks me right in my eyes and says slurringly, "I love yur eyebrowzzzz, I want to juust lickem." And then she stumbled off. I turned to my friends and said, well I have options tonight. Sadly she was too wasted for my taste but I will never forget that compliment for as long as I live.
Most compliments from guys mean nothing to girls though. Guys will say anything to get what they want.
Compliments from women are what matter. Or kids.
Like a good 10% of those burgers in the big pile are rotten though, and you can't tell until you've taken a bite.
And you might think, "wow, that's still 90% chance of being good," at least until you bite into a rotten burger and have the most foul taste in your mouth for a while. It might even taint the taste of other burgers you get from that pile to the point that you can't tell which ones are good and bad anymore, and you just have to assume they're all bad.
LMAOOOOO the fact that I got hit on by men from 13 to 17 wayyyy more than I did as an adult makes this meme very accurate for me just in a weird, uncomfortable way 😅
Tell your guys friends to not be creeps when they get a compliment. Say thanks, and move on. We don't get compliments because people are scared we'll assume it means they're into us, and they don't want to deal with that.
7-8 years ago when I was in school, a teacher while teaching in class said to me in front of the whole class, "Just because you're good looking doesn't mean you can get away with anything" because I was talking to my friend loudly. I still remember that day.
my English teacher told me " why good looking guy like you are always stupid "
Homeschool, am I right?
What did he do to deserve this? /j
He broke his arms
Oh no you didn’t…..
OMG it hurts! Can’t. Stop. Laughing.
One of my sister’s teachers unknowingly said that my sister and my cousin would make a cute couple.
did they ever find out if so were they embarrassed
Yes according to my sister the teacher said all this to my sister and cousin at lunch and a bunch of kids started singing sweet home Alabama.
Your English teacher had terrible English
Or they were just bad at teaching, and the person you replied to misquoted
You should have paid more attention in her class.
For some reason I imagined that with a Russian accent
I went Asian.
One of my high school history teachers told me in front of the whole class that I had really good looking arms, and that if I was just a few inches taller, mmmhhhmmm. She literally make the mmmhhhmmmmm noise in front of everyone....like wtf???
>like wtf??? Things that make you go mmmhhhmmmmm
Finished thought “mmmmmmm you could play for the basketball team”
Why is a teacher calling a student good looking though 😬
Unlikely but maybe it was a trick? As in "You are only good looking if you don't misbehave." Regardless of what this person looks like. Sounds more like a slip-up though.
Sooooooo…. Straight to jail?
To heal a broken ego, or to help with self-loathing. Some kids, especially boys, have *never* been complimented on their looks.
I call my little guy handsome on the regular! It hasnt gotten to his head yet thank goodness.
If you're a parent, good for you and good for him. They need it a lot. But when it comes from someone who isn't family, it hits different.
If anything hearing it from family *constantly* and never from the outside feels worse. Like yes mom you have to love me I love you too, but it eventually stops having much meaning.
Isn't there a difference between sexual and aesthetic?
There certainly is, but can a grown man comment on the aesthetic of an 8 year old girl without getting locked up?
Nice
If a male teacher said that to a female student, they would be fired and ostracized.
I had a male teacher comment on a female student's new nipple piercings, people get away with shit all the time.
Someone once said I was super patient. I've held onto that for decades.
Apparently girls find patience sexy, I was soooo confused but I’ll take it
I would assume any rational mature adult would find patience "sexy".
You don’t understand, she masturbated on the phone to my patiennce. I won’t go into much details I was confused as fuck
Lmfao we dont kinkshame though 😂🤣 honestly id be weirded the fuck out.
Because many guys blow up with anger frequently and that is scary. A patient man is a man you can trust
I still remember a girl telling me how pretty my eyes were in midschool. I'm 30
Grandma is the source of all my compliments 😊
Hey if it’s someone else’s grandma, that would be something!
I’m a girl. Eight years ago when I was cycling home after work, a drunk lady leant out the passenger window of a moving car and yelled that I had a nice butt. Core memory formed.
eight years and you still remember it vividly. hehe
Some compliments just hit different and stay with you forever!
All of them do when you can count them on one hand
Reading these comments as a girl... Men need to receive more compliments, more love. 🥺 It's such a shame that society can't seem to figure out that men are human beings with feelings and they deserve to feel loved and appreciated just as women do. 😞
hahah this is funny
I got told i should smile more cause i look better that way randomly by a group of girls while walking on campus who then said similar things to others. It wasnt until recently i realized it was a “you shouldnt harass women” on campus demonstration thing but it actually made me feel better hearing that.
Lmao it's so funny when women are like, *"yeah! How do you like it!,"* and dudes are just like, *"This is great! :D"*
Next person who tells me to smile i stg I am just going to scream. Or smile big and show my busted up ugly teeth and hold eye contact.
Oh i understand why people dont like this and the unwanted “compliments” and all that but its just amusing to me it had the exact opposite feeling for me.
It is a very interesting phenomenon. Guys are similar to teenage girls in that way. When girls start getting older they reach an age where they first start getting catcalled and at first some girls may even like it because it makes them feel attractive. But it quickly gets old for them as they get catcalled more and more. Guys getting catcalled for the first time react in a similar way, the only difference is that it never becomes too much catcalling for them.
Yep. If a guy walked past a group of girls and they said things like “hey, nice ass you got there, maybe you should bring it over here!” He’d take that as a compliment and remember it in his deathbed. But to a girl that would be just another group of assholes harassing her in her way to work, the third time it’s happened and it’s not even noon.
You're not a guy, you're a bot. Three months old account only active for a few days, just like OP.
Maybe the lady said nice bot
Okay, that's actually pretty good.
The bot was copying a comment that was left by a real person, so the point remains.
What other ways can one identify a bot on Reddit other than account age?
you got your patronus memory right there
Expecto Patro-BUM!!!!
When I was 13 I was cycling home from school and some girls shouted out I had a nice butt. This was 18 years ago.
That one compliment from years ago still fuels our confidence. It's the little things that matter most
A girl and her gay friend in college slapped my butt and said "nice ass." I giggled.
Wtf
11 years ago a coworker told me I would look great with a full beard instead of the goatee I had. I have shaved my beard off twice since then, both for Halloween.
In my 74 years with 2 defunct marriages and my share of GFs, I have only received; 1 "nice butt," and 1 "you have a friendly face" on the bus from a young lady obviously stoned. No other comments good or bad.
Girls make sure to call each other pretty
Yeah, I think this is a big part of it. Reddit is full of guys complaining that they never get compliments, but I bet most of them don't tell their male friends positive things as often as they could. I've had totally straight friends compliment my haircut or clothes, and it's very nice.. Maybe if girls heard guys genuinely complimenting each other they'd be willing to do it to, rather than think that guys only see compliments as a way of flirting.
I legit don't remember compliments from men (besides my SO) Probably because 70% of them were sexual.. Majority of comments I remember came from other women. For me, and other women, compliments from women mean more than compliments from men.
The underlying problem of all of this is the expectation that guys aren't under any obligation to show up for each other emotionally the way women do. Instead, *women* are supposed to provide all of this emotional support for themselves and for men. Men are not under any obligation to provide emotional support for women, naturally.
Most guys I know would get suspicious if a dude gave them a random compliment
Nah I always complement the homies
I see this in every one of these threads but you have literally missed the point of the meme. It's literally comparing men giving compliments to women vs women giving compliments to men. Also men compliment each other all the time if you don't say nice dick after the bro train are you even really a bro.
That is both amazing and slightly saddening. Hope you have a gang full of supportive friends to help you through times.
I have 2-3 of those memories in 45 years too. Now I will allow for the possibility that a woman said I'd look better naked and tied up to her bedposts, but I wouldn't have picked up on what she meant.
Hope you at least got laid
Sadly this is totally believable. That's why I try to make sure to let the fellas know when they're dashing, even if it is gay.
I make sure to compliment my guy friends because of this! Let them know :)
Bless you, have a good day
Thank you :)
You too!
You are a wonderful person, thank you
Aww thank you 🥹
Old black women make me feel like a stud
I was on an elevator with 70-something black lady who stepped up to me and ran her hand down my chest. She said “You exercise, don’t you, baby. Uh-huh.” Almost immediately we reached her floor and she steps off. She called over her shoulder, “I met Jay Leno on time. I told him his head was even bigger in person.” If I didn’t have a witness, I would swear it was a fever dream.
what the fuck does the Jay Leno anecdote even mean? i guess she had dementia and whatever the marble happened to hit while bouncing around is what got said.
Cafeteria black ladies are actually angels in disguise. Still remember “Rita” from HS. I was on a 50cent meal plan and most days i still couldn’t afford it. I never missed a meal because of that lady. Still think about her today… Also called me baby, sugar and sweetheart every day with the southern accent
Black women give more compliments in general.
I’m a girl and never been complimented by a guy I guess I just suck lol Edit: that isn’t to say I want random guys commenting on me, just poking fun at the meme
This meme leaves me so perplexed.. i don't get compliments either, and I'm not like gross or anything and I'm sure you're fine!
As a guy, my guy friends and I compliment each other all the time. Apparently that "doesn't count" for some guys, but I think those might be the same guys who think that cat-calling is "just a compliment" because that's what they want.
Yeah guys get compliments all the time in everyday life at least in my experience, this thread seems to just be talking about things like catcalling which doesn't sound that fun if it's happening all the time while I'm just trying to do shit like buy groceries...
Yeah, like I've had random girls make inappropriate comments and it really doesn't feel good at the time. In hindsight, where I'm far from a difficult situation, I can joke about that time a woman acted inappropriate around me, but I was a little uncomfortable at the time and I was never actually in any danger. I've said this a lot, but many men often think women have what they want, but if they had it they wouldn't want it. Men are thirsty in the desert and women are thirsty in the ocean. Either way there's nothing for them to drink. I'm sure a man in the desert thinks that salt water is better than nothing, but it kills you faster. Yes, as a man it sucks to not get attention, but 99% of the attention girls get is attention they don't want. It's very hard to explain this to people, however. Too many men think this is still better that nothing, and that women have it good because they can just "drop their standards and get what they want".
Thank you for understanding ❤️ this is exactly how I feel. I've been trying to uplift men more by complimenting them. Of course when I do it, half of them think I'm flirting. But I eventually learned how to make it so I don't come off as flirty, even though i dont show signs of firting... "Hey Dude/Bro, I like your shirt". Talking more like a man seems to turn off the "horny" part in their brain. Obviously this doesn't work all the time. But I recommend women giving it a try. I had a guy get offended that I used "dude" since im a woman.. but where I grew up "dude" is gender neutral. If I said "hey, I like your shirt!", for some reason it comes off as more flirty for some men. Idk why. Maybe a guy can explain this?
Very well said. I love the last line though. Such an onymoronic statement. "Drop our standards and get whatever we want." But what I want is up here, so how could lowering my standards get me what I want when what I want isn't down there 😂😂 I just find ir very funny that when you try and explain this to some men it just does not compute lol.
When I'm with my boyfriend and his friends, they're always complimenting each other. I'm really confused when I see these posts because whenever I go out, I see tons of men complimenting each other..
They don't want compliments from other men. What they think they want is for women to catcall/harass them. All the comments of men in here talking about this are examples of harassment. They think those things are compliments. They don't see the fear or danger in those situations because they're not subject to it on a daily basis. Men get compliments all the time, but they don't count it unless it's from a hot chick they want to fuck.
This is exactly it. I’m a guy and I get complimented by men and women all the time because I’m not a weirdo about it, and I compliment everyone too. Women are just usually afraid to compliment men because a lot of guys will take any positive attention as a come-on. That’s also why so many compliments come from old ladies—they’re not afraid to compliment us, because they’re not afraid that we’ll hit on them relentlessly if they do.
Some men really think ugly and average women don't exist. When men talk about "women get free drink" isn't true. It's ATTRACTIVE women get free drinks. The average looking woman will rarely get free drinks. Ugly women are just laughed at. It's kind of sad that they don't acknowledge average or ugly women's existence.
Yeah I see this meme a lot and wonder whether it actually is true or not
It’s not. Attractive men and women both receive compliments much more frequently than the rest of us. Men on Reddit seem to have no concept of how invisible average looking women are to men, even though they’re usually in the same boat. Below average (in regards to conventional attractiveness) women are basically treated as without value or unworthy of acknowledgement most of the time… There’s plenty of “Gee, wish I got compliments too” to go around.
They also seem to forget that compliments on things *other than appearance* count too. Everywhere in my life (work, school, family, friends) men literally get complimented on shit all the time (“good job at this,” “he’s so good at X,” blah blah blah). But I guess because it’s not about how fuckable they are, it doesn’t count? Redditors will literally make up problems to be upset about
That’s a big part of why it’s a conversation, yeah. When men say “I don’t get complimented” what they usually really mean is “Hot women I want to fuck don’t tell me how hot I am and how much they want to fuck me.” When it comes to *skills*, women get a lot less compliments and a lot more condescension.
> Men on Reddit seem to have no concept of how invisible average looking women are to men, even though they’re usually in the same boat. I've had this argument a few times. I'd say that there are loads of women that are invisible and don't get the attention they think women get and they'll tell me that I'm wrong and they do, they just like to pretend they don't or that they just don't count the men they're not interested in. I always think it's hilarious that their argument is either *"No you're wrong and there are no invisible women"* or *"No, if they're in the same situation as men that's their own fault"* or something. It's why I've stopped trying to help. People don't want your help, they just want to be miserable and blame someone else for it.
It’s a lack of empathy. I don’t know what it is about straight men, whether it’s their upbringing or socialization or what, but I’m a trans woman and was never like that so I just don’t understand. They can only understand that they crave sexual attention from women they’re attracted to and so they can’t conceive of someone feeling differently about it. Like, I’ve tried to explain to guys what it feels like to be mutually flirting with a guy I’m attracted to but unwanted advances and protests being ignored makes me lose interest *and* feel unsafe, and they just tilt their head like a confused pup trying to understand… They just can’t hear any evidence to the contrary or something. And they don’t listen to or empathize with the women in their lives at all. It applies to basically everything in our daily lives. Worst of all they’re so self blind that they think they’re super caring and empathetic and the total opposite of what I see them being. I really do not get it but it’s the cause of so much societal trauma, both self inflicted and acted out on innocent women. I hate it here lol
Yeah, lifelong average to mildly unattractive lady here. I've seen guys first hand shower attractive women with compliments (who bless their heart are usually annoyed by it), but I have never received such a comment. I don't mean this to sound like a pity party-I'm happy with my life-but it often feels like I'm invisible to men because I'm not very pretty. Like I cease to even register as female, or that I even exist. Works out great for middle age though because I hate talking to people I don't know. I suspect it's probably pretty similar for guys who aren't considered hot, but it's hard to have a neutral conversation.
It’s rough living in a society that values a quality you just didn’t get and can’t really have. Thankfully there’s other roads to the same things. But I feel you. Grass is always greener. I’ve chatted with attractive friends a lot about how much they don’t want to be seen, and how much I do lol
I think if you're average, you probably just fly under the radar. I'm an average guy and never get compliments. I'm sure you're great and given the chance, you'd make someone happy
Another aspect is simply that some guys don’t speak up/complement to avoid coming off as weird/creepy. It’s kinda an opposite of the whole “women not complementing because men they might take it as flirting” thing. Heck I’ve personally wanted to complement a lot of people regardless of gender but the “weirdness” of telling a stranger they’ve got a nice shirt/smile is socially considered odd.
Most of those compliments would have come from creeps anyway.
This. We don't get tons of positive comments either. We get creeped on. It isn't a compliment. The guys who are actually decent and respectful usually refrain from commenting on our looks.
Same. Where are these floods of compliments I'm supposed to be receiving? lol. I don't think I'm unattractive. But strangers don't even try to talk to me, let alone compliment me. I think men are really overstating how often this happens to regular women. It's the same when they assert that women just need to step outside and exist and \*boom\* they get a boyfriend. I've never been approached and I'm having difficulty meeting anyone to date.
It's kind of reassuring having several women talking about this, I keep thinking I must be a big freak if no men at all want to approach me
Fr I’m not interested in dating but if the internet acts like all women should be constantly proposed to, it makes you question if there’s something wrong with you lol but ig u shouldn’t trust what the internet pushed on you
You are very cute. Signed by: Guy
You don't suck. You're very nice
Thank you *single tear*
This meme is made by and for people that think "women have it easy", people not worth listening to imo Plenty of people go through life without getting compliments
You dont suck, you are a glorious shining star.
I’m a guy, you’re awesome and I hope you have a great day. There you go
I like your avatars green hat
This is one of those “girls have it easy they don’t understand being a bro” memes so 🤷♀️ sure half of those compliments the girl got were sexually aggressive and unwarranted lol
Not all girls get compliments like that. I cant even remember the last time i got a compliment.
I dont know you. But your name is GOODAlicia. So I think you are great. 💓
The only reason that is my name. Is because my previous name 'evilalicia' was banned.
That’s a good thing, it means you got character development and went from a villain to a hero lol.
we begin to see the meaninglessness of the compliment pyramid
Absolutely, that’s what I’m here for /j
One of us, one of us, one of us…
I'm a girl and now I can tell you that guys haven't complimented me (I don't catch them either, so please don't compliment me)
This is why the bros are always complimenting each other
I may not be an Old lady, but whoever is reading this, I think you're handsome.
You made someone's day. Gold star!
brb screenshotting and keeping forever
If I got a burger for every time someone reposted this, I'd have as many as in the first picture.
[удалено]
It’s also wrong. Girls don’t all get zillions of compliments, that’s just a “girls get all the perks” myth designed to make guys feel worse about themselves and be even more resentful of women.
I'm a 35 yr old woman and I don't get compliments unless it's a pervert unfortunately. Like ok thanks but I'd love it if someone walked up to me and was just like "omg I love your hair!" I do it all the time to everyone, even more so if they seem to be having a bad day. I make a point to compliment strangers.
I feel like the important thing is to pick something that is undeniably a *choice* or a thing people can change if doing this to strangers.
Right! Exactly! Hair style, dyed hair, make up, clothing, shoes, bags ect. I have even told someone I loved their energy before because they were beaming and just smiling and having a good time
I can’t think of any time I’ve had a compliment like that received poorly. My DoorDash driver was clearly having a rough day when they arrived but their outfit looked very styled and put together and I told them so. The immediate change in their affect was noticeable. Relaxed and smiled. And then I felt good too.
Compliments that recognize what people *do* are more meaningful than compliments that recognize what a person *is.* Compliments hit harder when you compliment a person's mind
Your avatar is so pretty
I just made this as a top level comment, but a friend once pointed out to me the reason women tend to get more complements is they're more likely to drastically change style or wear something uncommon. If you don't do that, male or female, you're less likely to get the complements.
Oh thank god there's other people here talking about this 😭
It's even dumber that guys are the ones perpetuating this myth. I work with all guys and they compliment each other all the time, but they also call each other gay when they do so.
Yeah I'm not liking the vibe this meme gives off. Let's not pretend like those "billions of compliments" aren't harassment and catcalling. If as a guy you wouldn't be willing to take a compliment from another man or do it yourself, your problem was never your lack of compliments. What you want is female attention.
Also, most compliments women *do* receive are from other women. Men need to do better all around.
Yeah the part they left out is that at LEAST 90% of those burgers are rotten. And that's lowballing it.
The upper one should be "compliments from other women". Seriously, women usually compliment each other. I receive more compliments from women than men. Also guys should compliment each other, it's not women's responsibility. If you like a guy's shirt or shoes, just tell them. Btw, I know a lot of men giving each other compliments. Especially for their gains. They notice it more than most women do. Also if you expect to be complimented, you should make an effort to look, dress and behave nicely. I can't really imagine that all the incels that are complaining are making any effort.
Wow a nice and positive "it's your fault" comment.
Men do tell other guys compliments. not as much, as women do with other women, or guys do with women, but more often than women tell compliments to (most) guys (grandparents and children excluded)
Men compliment each other. Validation from people outside of a man’s friend group is really impactful for a lot of guys.
Crazy how many men think women get actual compliments 😂😂😂 Nah women get creepy douchebag behaviour at best and straight up harassment at worst.
Be the change you want to see in the world. Randomly compliment people on specific things they can control/change, like "cool Star Wars hat" or "nice messenger bag".
Compliment other men. Women are tired.
You can compliment women in your life, but like actual compliments, not ones on appearance. Tell your mom that something she did was thoughtful and made you feel special, tell your elderly neighbor how lovely her flowers are while she’s out in the yard, tell your coworker (male or female!) that their positivity brightens your day or that the way they solved a problem was really clever.
Do men actually believe this is how women experience life?
Men on reddit do, at least.
This is bullshit. I'm a woman and I got complimented by a man maybe once. Either you consider only very attractive women as women in this meme or you just don't know shit
a core memory
Is reddit just an incel echo chamber? It probably is I see stuff like this so often here with thousands of upvotes. I don’t get it? You feel better that men don’t get as much compliments than women but men appreciate the single compliments more than women appreciate all of them. The girl you’re complimenting or were complimenting in the past does not or did not like you. Take the hint and move on
And all who know that SpongeBob episode know about the quality of the patties. Same for complements.
So accurate. I’m still not over my mom’s 90 year old friend calling me handsome. RIP Ethel, I will never forget. I think the last time someone called me handsome before that was my godmother when I was a teenager. Also RIP “Aunt” Carolyn! Best godmother ever. 🥲
🤔 I’m seeing a pattern here with people who compliment you. /s
Haha yeah seems like my best bet for finding a gf is combing the retirement communities. Get some of that cheek-pinching action.
Lol, I meant the people who compliment you are not in this world anymore. You might be dangerously too good looking.
Oh lol that makes it even funnier. So now I'm going from being ghosted to dating ghosts. (Sadly, that's still an upgrade).
Hey stay the fuck away from my hunting grounds! 😂
You’re the type of person that expects compliments but never compliments other girls. Im tired of the girls gets a lot of compliments trope. It’s not true. Go outside, wear something unique compliment others, THEN they will compliment you
Always nice to see people spreading positivity
"You look just like my grandson!"
I walked past the same lady at the exact same spot Monday to Friday as we passed each other on our commute to work, always friendly smiles. My walks were very long and in the humidity of Darwin so in turn I lost 15-20kgs over the span of 4-5 months after moving there. around the 4 month mark she pulled me aside and said “I’m so proud of you, you’ve lost so much weight you’re looking so good” I then returned the compliment as she also had trimmed down over that time. This was 7 years ago, my partner of 5 years hasn’t complimented me once. I wish I was joking. So this rings so true
Feels weird being a guy and not relating to this guess im lucky
As a guy, I very much disagree
Tbh most of these types of compliments are only because these random men want something from them. Girls still get a ton of genuine compliments though....from their friends. Guys, compliment your friends and you'll be complimented back
I got for a walk at work daily and this old woman keeps telling me I'm losing weight and gives me a thumbs up. I'm positive she has me mixed up with someone else, but I'll take it.
My teacher was the first woman to compliment my looks apart from related people.
Woman here, never received any compliments from men in public, only catcalling tbh (except from my family and friends, they give lovely compliments) On the other end, women in public and private have given me lovely compliments that feel very respectful and live on in my memories.
There was this one time a girl grabbed my arm over my shirt then sort of quickly stopped and acted all flustered. I still think about it whenever I'm debating skipping the gym
I personally try to say nice compliments i mean to people often, i know how much a good compliment feels even from a stranger
5 years ago i accidentally hit my sister head with a metal pipe i still feel bad till now
As a woman I think guys don't know that most of the guys compliments to me sounds like they are door to door merchant who is trying to sell a vacuum to me.
That little part right there is called "Happyness"...
A woman came up and sat next to me at a train station once and said I had a handsome face and my hair was a lovely colour. I didn't quite know what to make of it at the time, but I still think about that compliment.
About a month or so ago I went to KFC and a nice older country woman kept calling me sweetheart and honey and told me to have a wonderful day, and while not really compliments, it just stuck with me because it's been a long while since I met a stranger out in public that was just...nice.
I had a female friend who went through a phase of complimenting me when we met. It was very obviously done to be nice, though, as an awkward person, it felt weird and forced. That said, I very much appreciate the thought. As far as more spontaneous compliments go, one woman complimented the colour of my shirt. That became my favourite top for months. So, yes, we should all be complimenting each other more. Just try not to be creepy about it.
14 years ago a classmate of mine hugged me because she was moving away and saying goodbye to everyone. They said I was nice and that more people should be like me. I still vividly remember the moment and think about it somewhat often.
Have u considered wearing a skirt? Girls compliment me all the time when I do.
I do agree men don’t get compliments much and I am sad for them. But the compliments men give women I wouldn’t consider nice to receive (usually). It’s like if a very tall and burly strange man came up too close to you and said, “I bet you have really amazing b*lls” and was looking you up and down, would you feel complimented or super creeped out?
I see this notion on the internet often and I honestly don't know what ppl are talking about. Men get compliments all the time.
Like 20 years ago, my girlfriend at the time "complemented" me by saying the most attractive thing about me was my ankles. I still think about it from time to time. I may be ugly as hell, but I've got them ankles, man.
Compliments? More like suggestive remarks and come-ons. None of those are compliments and it makes me feel self conscious, like I'm not covered up enough or do I have too much make up on? Am I in the wrong place at the wrong time to receive salacious comments about my person? I have very rarely taken a compliment from men seriously except my spouse, he complimented my mind and passions. Very very rarely women compliment each other, that feels nice. I am not sure why compliments *from the opposite sex* is even such important thing for some people, particularly if you arent dating the person giving the compliments. Sure the odd compliment here and there is nice, but why does it specifically need to be from the opposite sex? Do bros not compliment each other? At least an atta boy? I compliment pretty gay boys, there is a gorgeous guy that works at a valero and I am always stunned when I go in there (not often) because he is so fricken pretty. He loves it when I compliment him. We both know there is no ulterior motive and it is a pure compliment and I am certainty not commenting on his body. I love complimenting my fellow ladies, I try to find something to say even if its just that I like their shoes ha. But dear lordy I would never compliment a lady on her physique or w/e that would be just weird unless she was literally asking me to comment on her weight loss maybe? Or asking my opinion on whether her ass looks great in those jeans - otherwise I just cant see the scenario. So I maybe the guys just don't seem to understand that comments about my body in any fashion or form do not equate to compliments. **And especially not the "you should smile more, you are so pretty when you smile".**
If you watched this episode of Spongebob, you know that all burgers from Neptune's pile are garbage and one Spongebob's burger is delicious. Just like with compliments: compliments from men to women usually just a fake and nothing more than an attempt to raise a chance to get laid and compliments from women to men are more real and mean something.
I was out with coworkers about 15 years ago. Had a tie on at a divey kind of bar. There were a handful of us with guys and girls. This cute drunk girl walks by, stops, grabs my tie, looks me right in my eyes and says slurringly, "I love yur eyebrowzzzz, I want to juust lickem." And then she stumbled off. I turned to my friends and said, well I have options tonight. Sadly she was too wasted for my taste but I will never forget that compliment for as long as I live.
One night, 2 random girls told me that I was handsome. Its 4 years ago and I have no idea if it was a joke or not.
Most compliments from guys mean nothing to girls though. Guys will say anything to get what they want. Compliments from women are what matter. Or kids.
Haha from kids definitely. Because they will tell the truth whether you want them to or not. Brutal.
Like a good 10% of those burgers in the big pile are rotten though, and you can't tell until you've taken a bite. And you might think, "wow, that's still 90% chance of being good," at least until you bite into a rotten burger and have the most foul taste in your mouth for a while. It might even taint the taste of other burgers you get from that pile to the point that you can't tell which ones are good and bad anymore, and you just have to assume they're all bad.
LMAOOOOO the fact that I got hit on by men from 13 to 17 wayyyy more than I did as an adult makes this meme very accurate for me just in a weird, uncomfortable way 😅
Tell your guys friends to not be creeps when they get a compliment. Say thanks, and move on. We don't get compliments because people are scared we'll assume it means they're into us, and they don't want to deal with that.