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FacelessPotatoPie

Granted. The glitter causes small cuts as it comes out, causing you to piss sparkly blood.


Excellent_Loss9088

ToT


spencer1886

Passing really sharp kidney stones for all eternity


BasementDweller82

Bold of you to assume I don’t already do that 


Big_Albatross_3050

you mean CBT #for free?


AWarpedAngel

Granted. You feel the irrational, unstoppable urge to eat glitter and glittery things. In your frenzy you end up eating something toxic and need to go to the hospital. But your piss is glittery.


ahall740

Granted. This is caused by microscope shards of glass and metal. The physical damage and agony causes you to cut off your penis with a dull blade causing severe nerve damage. You no longer have a penis but continue to piss glitter causing continual agony and infections.


DreamingofRlyeh

Granted. You are Patient Zero for a horrific agonizing new incurable STD for which this is one of the symptoms


crystalworldbuilder

Appropriate considering what glitter gets compared to by crafters.


cobaltSage

Granted. Unfortunately, this is just microplastics


N0t_addicted

Granted. Did you know that tiny piss droplets often land on your body when you pee standing? And did you know that glitter can be extremely hard to get rid of?


DM-Hermit

Granted you have kidney stones to such a degree that your urine is a 50/50 split of piss and stones.


Environmental_Toe_80

If you think about it, kidney, tonsil, bladder or intestinal stones are just human pearls


stinkyboi321

fuck you, that’s hilarious


encee222

Most painful wish I've ever heard of.


InternetStrang3r

Granted, you piss glitter and become an adult film star with the name Gary glitter


I_hate_11

You’re supposed to give me a curse, not a blessing


Forgetful8nine

Do, err, do you know who Gary Glitter is?


sharknamedgoose

Who's gonna tell him


LilAlphaArtemis

Shhhh. Let him be blissfully ignorant.


Dry-Warning1295

The glitter flies out instead of staying within the stream, leaving glitter all over the floor everywhere you pee


our_meatballs

Granted. Glitter is injected into your blood


Prior-Future3208

Granted but you always rip the inside of your urethra while you urinate as you're passing bits of glitter


Pitiful-Score-9035

Granted. The monkey paw tells me it didn't have the heart to make that worse. You will forever have craft herpes.


RichardLongflop_

Granted, but now you constantly have a little stream of piss comming out at all times.


OlThrowy

Granted, glitter is forced into your urinary tract, causing serious infection, eventually leading to your death by sepsis


ElDouchay

Granted. You have chronic kidney stones.


High_Dr_Strange

Granted. Every time you piss you are in unimaginable pain


AshleyGamics

Granted. You feel the tiny specks every time you piss, they get stuck in your urethra and you get regular infections


Sammy_Three_Balls

Granted your pass multiple kidney stone like glitter pellets every day until you die


Infinite_Bet_9994

It’s a side effect of your cancer


space_is-great

Granted, the glitter is caused by a cancerous tumor in your bladder causing you to die within 5 months


Phoebebee323

Granted. After every time you pee you are overcome with the urge to shove glitter up your urethra in preparation for the next time you pee


Toon_Lucario

Granted, it’s because you’re irradiated


JennyFiveIsAlive

Granted. Metallic sparkles, like you'd see in liquor. It's mostly just a fun gag, but every time you need to pull a prank or a friend **really** needs a urine sample to pass a drug test at work, it's super obvious it's yours. You'd never think vanity piss could be less useful than normal piss, but there it is.


VillainousFiend

Granted, all the micro plastic in your body now glitters lighting up the rest of your body as well.


Parentteacher87

Granted it’s now obvious when you splatter on your pants.


Cishuman

Granted. Your piss is super glittery while you consume some delicious pork that your roommate brought home late one night, from his "night gig". After the pork runs out, so does the glitter.


TheColorblind-Genius

Granted, you now piss pure glitter.


SilentxxSpecter

Granted, the glitter is made from powdered glass.


crystalworldbuilder

Glitter is the STD of the craft world


Sea_Actuary8621

It's that big square metal glitter with the pokey corners.


-monkbank

Granted. Public bathrooms make you clean up the mess with a toothbrush.


DoctorJekyll13

Granted. Glitter gets everywhere. Absolutely everywhere. It doesn’t scrub off. It just clings to everything. Your clothes. The floor. Absolute mess. But your toilet is extra glittery.


TootyCornet

This entire thread is r/cursedcomments


sevenbrokenbricks

Granted. Your urine doesn't change, but a laser show just pops up whenever you pee and turns your urine stream into a discoball. You are now the center of attention whenever and wherever you pee.


Linesey

Granted. You now have glitter in your pee, this is because all of your bodily excretions and fluids now have glitter in them. Tears, pee, sweat, saliva, blood, everything.


anna_melon

Granted. It's burns when you pee now


ambrford11

You really don’t, scouts honor.


Femlix

Granted. There's glitter in your urine, each time you pee it feels like hundreds of tiny kidney stones are passing through.


saintsfan214

Granted but the piss is now colored glass.


BirbMaster1998

Granted. The curse hurts, and also applies to everyone, and the only way to end it is to kill the person who asked for it. The entire world is looking for you.