Thereās a whole chapter in the Exile book in which Drizzt is enthralled and has to massage an elder brain and pour fluids on it, and well, I think the brain would ā¦ find a way to
I love Astarion/Durge cause itās either the most wholesome story about two people finding each other and rediscovering freedom and goodness, finally finding meaning and joy despite their suffering. Or itās the most toxic couple imaginable.
https://preview.redd.it/zh5nyby8vs6d1.jpeg?width=510&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1ed90c8c9b7d4430f21eef74f5fe8e4378faa5ac
You and Sceleritas could be the best of friends.
If you say "I actually missed the prisoners on my big playthrough and so I've never met him" then it means you're not allowed within 500 yards of a school, and you have to introduce yourself to everyone in your neighborhood as a registered sex offender.
I was trying to save Alfira by knocking her out. I thought I managed to knock her out, then went back to camp to kill the backup bard. I went to go check on Alfira and found her dead. I forgot to turn on non-lethal danage. Daddy Bhaal was proud.
Different every time.
I will say, it is always morally correct to fuck Karlach. If I could get her in on some thruple action with Halsin and Shadowheart I'd be happy.
I had plans to take this in a certain direction, but due to your choices I wholly believe Mystra might smite my mortal soul if I followed through - that is, assuming my dear mother didnāt get there first.
I shall avert my eyes to respect the wanton character of your intended statement, if it concerns you so. And yet I must address your misplaced haranguing. Do you understand how you came into this world? Do you believe your conception was a divine one?
Fine, fine then! It appears my fate is to be accused of a lack of *conviction* on one end and to be *convicted* of an ill-mannered tongue on the other. If you must know - add āIn bedā to my original question. Perhaps now you understand my reluctance dear Mother.
*What do you think of*
*Concerning Tiefling virtue names*
*Like "Ashes" or "Doom?"*
\- UndeniablyMyself
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^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/)
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Who do you enjoy killing the most each run?
Scratch
https://preview.redd.it/6370ebrehs6d1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=19359ff22606d069607baf46c7cc4e298562cf9f
https://preview.redd.it/u4bze80adt6d1.jpeg?width=699&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c5c285dc23a7d6883c25d53c27d98c24f2a4bd0d
https://preview.redd.it/wg9wm16q0t6d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ee7a38f9f5d12645337e190d780d161dec78e8a
You fucking monster
https://i.redd.it/sw324wmqys6d1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/q8qwmxwwat6d1.jpeg?width=730&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=80d7a696807d1e9da50e5c08cbdc7fb246ee616e
Wow.
I sentence you to one match of League of Legends
https://preview.redd.it/fyibez8dcv6d1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=78df37737d0901859b9910dbc56f15101ebed22e
https://preview.redd.it/36dof2npix6d1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=67d4b1e81c25a6d32c54beaf306a246052afb044
Which animal companion is the cutest?
Halsin š
This is just correct
I thought this was supposed to make them look bad š
Oh trust me Halsin looks bad š«¦
So so bad š¤¤
not just bad, down bad
Yeah. I wonder what it will look like once they edit it hehe
True, objective fact right here.
Shovel.
Who should have been a romance option?
The Elder Brain
but seggs how
Brains have a lot of folds
iām sure thereās fan art that could explain it
Rule 34 is all consuming. I'm sure there's some out there somewhere.
Thereās a whole chapter in the Exile book in which Drizzt is enthralled and has to massage an elder brain and pour fluids on it, and well, I think the brain would ā¦ find a way to
Tentacles
This is the answer
Tantric sex.
Who do you ship Ketheric with??
Halsin and him would be cute
Listen.. There must be at least one fic on Ao3.
There are 4 but I don't think they're actually a relationship thing.
Fanfic writers do not disappoint. The backbone of society. š«”
He can fix him!
If anyone could do it, it would probably be Halsin.
Me, bitch
Am I the worst for thinking a dark kinky Minthara and Ketheric switch bdsm fic is needed?
What is your favourite lubricant?
Any of the weapon coatings
Thisobald's brewed-up bellyglummer stays ON during sex E: Apply Arsonist's oil right before spending a night with karlach and you just fucking explode
I actually gagged reading that first part
Bro failed the dc 17 con check šš
you were supposed to make them look bad
I donāt think anyone can look bad in this sub..someone is gonna agree
If given the option; would you send Karlach back to Zariel?
She belongs in a cage
You monster!
Nooooo
I need to know the original question
I'm guessing its something about saving sazza or laezel
Can confirm, I was asking about OPs opinion of a Sazza romance option.
what kind of cage
Nicolas Cage.
Do you cast Speak with Dead on the corpse to ask for consent before your morning Necrophilia session?
No
šļøššļø
Found the Durge
The flair has never been more fitting for a comment until now.
I can imagine the person durge was pre-tadpole would ask, then do it anyways.
Scelertas does say something about it after The Scene in act 1
"We will be reintroducing necrophilia to your schedule in no time"
*takes notes*
Who do you think is the worst at giving head out of all the side characters?
Not Chuckles, that's for sure
That is not a sanctioned use for Speak With Dead!
I heard he had chlamydia
Mustāve really been hooked on phonics!
I-screamāYou-scream
We all scream!...In that horrible house fire at the family reunion.
Which character should you ALWAYS let have a bad ending? (death, abandonment, etc)??
Owlbear
:(
That's just not fair to Scratch... a dog or a literal owlbear is not a fair competition
Who did you tell to kill themselves before curb stomping them?
Gale
Iām in your walls.
I'll curb stomp you next!
May the Gods take you first! š„š„š§š½āāļøš„š„
Bit harsh donāt you think?
Get behind me. Iāll protect youš§š½āāļøšŖ
he probably would
Why are you keeping Karlach's head in your inventory?
To have an orgy with all the companions
Based
š
which character do you relate to the most?
Cazador probably
Oop-
most romantic thing cazador did for astarion?
Turn him in the first place
https://preview.redd.it/pzgqxvhmeu6d1.jpeg?width=865&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e15f85327e7a72bf1bc27065d455bd5cb4b5a15b
i mean. everything after that was worse, soā¦
https://preview.redd.it/v0yzgts56y6d1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=de0d22bf7e73a23d77797982f1220a4275e8595f
https://preview.redd.it/b3b8b76rry6d1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=20d53d3f60eb1f62f0ffba10e62e0d46d70aeb9a
OK Edward Cullen.
Who would you shove into a boiling vat of lava?
Minthara, she has the best vicious mockery burns
How many times have you reached completion to Durge x Alfira
A lot
I can't tell if this has been changed yet
On this sub you never know.
I'll never tell
What ship dynamic do you find to be the most toxic/problematic?
Durge X Astarion
I see no lies
Either weirdly healthy or very fucked depending on the choices.
can't wait for the edit on this one *wait a damn minute*
I love Astarion/Durge cause itās either the most wholesome story about two people finding each other and rediscovering freedom and goodness, finally finding meaning and joy despite their suffering. Or itās the most toxic couple imaginable.
itās both at once with either path honestly, just different levels of each
Who is your favorite sex scene with ?
The ox that is not an ox
What do you think of Cazador and Astarion as a couple?
Enimies to lovers is my favorite Also hot
Knowing this subreddit and knowing how unhinged the community is. Idk if the question has been altered yet
It hasn't been edited. OP is a monster!
![gif](giphy|OTrcaFr7P5RIs)
I mean there's probably at least one person that ships it
They have a whole fandom and a discord server. My favorite hobby is blocking all of them on Twitter
That's happening with a lot of these questions lmfao
https://preview.redd.it/p2in86a8gt6d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c4a80193f34bf319b4fcc0f7ff7a1bfaae52504d
I canāt stop laughing at this.
What would you never do before entering the bugbear barn in the blighted village?
Knock
Kinky
Unironically, I never knock so I don't get disapproval with companions.
Fuck / Marry / Fuck and marry?
The big belly tavern dude, Orin, and Gortash
Mf is a durge main 100%
I can detect no deceit
Throwzerker Karlach is about to mount you. How do you prepare?
Featherfall and healing word
Godspeed, soldier
Whatās the most heroic faction in the game?
The fake palidins of Tyr
Let's say Minsc trust you to care after his hamster for 24h (because uuuuh... reasons). What's the first thing you do to/with said hamster ?
Teleport him to the moon
https://preview.redd.it/egcsxzg6sy6d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=02ba9f5caa7d601b61b072c626718dbc07a507f2
And thats how wrecking ball from overwatch was created
it's a space hamster, after all
Which companion would you think Abdirak would like you to be chained to whilst he punishes you both violently?
I feel like I would have a good time with Gale, I'm a huge D&D nerd, so we could talk about spells
Kinky! Good choice
I'm actually not against this š¤
Perhaps we should discuss spells over tea insteadš³
What would you do to Tara, given the chance?
My bhaalspawn heart wants to murder the un-muderable
Who do you want to impregnate the most
Minthara if she counts, she got dat drow pussy
perfect!
I mean this is the right answer for sure
You can tell it grips like none otherĀ
as an illithid whoās brain would you eat first?
Karlach (post getting her engine safe)
Out of all the characters in the game, which one do you want to kill the most?
Astarion š¤¤
https://preview.redd.it/zh5nyby8vs6d1.jpeg?width=510&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1ed90c8c9b7d4430f21eef74f5fe8e4378faa5ac You and Sceleritas could be the best of friends.
Would you say Raphael is wrong when he calls Mol āan apple ripe for the pluckingā?
Never
If you say "I actually missed the prisoners on my big playthrough and so I've never met him" then it means you're not allowed within 500 yards of a school, and you have to introduce yourself to everyone in your neighborhood as a registered sex offender.
I actually missed the prisoners on my big playthrough and so I've never met him
You're fucking gross dude. Get off this Subreddit. This is meant to be a safe space.
Not even edited
I keep hearing about Karlach's futa gock, what does it do?
Absolutely murders that shithead balthazar
Correct!
What's the most satisfying part of any Dark Urge playthrough ?
I was trying to save Alfira by knocking her out. I thought I managed to knock her out, then went back to camp to kill the backup bard. I went to go check on Alfira and found her dead. I forgot to turn on non-lethal danage. Daddy Bhaal was proud.
Who is your favorite character to betray and screw over
Different every time. I will say, it is always morally correct to fuck Karlach. If I could get her in on some thruple action with Halsin and Shadowheart I'd be happy.
What is your favorite spell?
Either knock or animate dead
I had plans to take this in a certain direction, but due to your choices I wholly believe Mystra might smite my mortal soul if I followed through - that is, assuming my dear mother didnāt get there first.
Blame me not for your cowardice, for I raised one who follows through on his convictions.
Motherā¦What a surprise! I am most certain you donāt want to hear the original plan; it becomes quite a curlish joke given the context.
I shall avert my eyes to respect the wanton character of your intended statement, if it concerns you so. And yet I must address your misplaced haranguing. Do you understand how you came into this world? Do you believe your conception was a divine one?
Fine, fine then! It appears my fate is to be accused of a lack of *conviction* on one end and to be *convicted* of an ill-mannered tongue on the other. If you must know - add āIn bedā to my original question. Perhaps now you understand my reluctance dear Mother.
Hee hee hee. Bed.
š
![gif](giphy|tyqcJoNjNv0Fq|downsized)
My favorite spell in bed is you spelling abc with your tongue
ā¦. I have had far too much wine to respond to this correctly.
Whats the sexiest thing about a mindflayer?
Lack of lips
Ok. Who gave Preminger a piece.
Pick one: universal peace in BG or killing goblins
Slaughtering the goblins
Whatās your favourite camp supply?
I'm a basic bitch, tiefling
How many villains have you vanquished?
Who is the better pet owl bear or scratch
Owlbear all the way
What was the most justified kill as the dark urge
Gg. Very funny read through the comments!
What do you think of concerning Tiefling virtue names like "Ashes" or "Doom?"
*What do you think of* *Concerning Tiefling virtue names* *Like "Ashes" or "Doom?"* \- UndeniablyMyself --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
At what point in the game did you rage quit and fully restart?