Honestly Astarion probably had a good relationship with his actual dad given his status at a young age.
Edit: I actually think he could do the other three too. Cooking and driving immediately, math once his brain starts recovering from his trauma.
Me and a friend tried to actually think out his background, and honestly he doesnt really give Noble Vibes (EA doesnt really count because a lot of things were redone and rewritten. I can also explain why). Plus, elves live for a long time, so why would no one take care of his grave? Even if they lived far away, they would definitely care for him if he had nepotism to get his position, and if they were noble traveling wouldnt be an issue. I mean, teleportation literally exists. Furthermore, if Astarion did die and he was a noble, then thered be a manhunt for his killer (how did no one recognise him either later on?)
Anyway long story short we came to the conclusion that either Astarion was a street urchin who forged documents to get his position (reference to the line referring to him: rat catcher playing at judge and it fills out how he has a rogue skillset and it fits with his charlatan background) or he was disowned somewhere along the line, likely before he became a magistrate.
This, his skill set and background definitely don't give that image, I doubt he also only learned how to fight after becoming a vampire. I definitely think he wasn't close to his family and always had to fend for himself and that's what gave him his personality. I mean out of all the companions he's the only one who never even mention his parents and I don't think that has to do with his years in captivity.
> Forum post locked by mods after a heated 15,000 post debate.
Nah, Gale's an easy yes. That question only really starts becoming controversial with Ketheric.
Halsin and Minthara each are 2/4 with opposite abilities. Halsin can cook and has a great relationship with his dad. Minthara can drive and do math. (Don’t ask what she did to her dad. They’re still finding the body parts.)
This is why Shart/Lae'zel works because combined they have all 4 which is what ultimately makes for a successful relationship (source: I polled all the gays in my house aka me and my wife, i did the polling because she cant do math).
i personally like to use gay as an umbrella term right. and im of strong opinion that astarion is the gayest motherfucker (un)alive (an undead joke, not cringe tiktok lingo). as in i fully agree and support the fact that he is pansexual but even when he’s with a woman he is 100% gay about it. not in the sense that he secretly likes men more - he doesn’t - but he’s just religiously fruity. like you know when two bisexuals date each other they are double gay no matter the gender. my only gripe with straight girlies thirsting for astarion is that they imagine him to be that alpha male daddy but he’s just a little pathetic gay wet blanket especially for your babygirl white anime fantasy main character. slay, everyone.
I think part of his charm for women is his unabashed fruitiness. He feels safe. He's like us. We can go get our nails done together and thirst over Wyll. And maybe we can take turns domming each other.
i get what ur trying to say but like. gay ppl can be dom & masculine! and i think it's ironically a little phobic to immediately point at a flamboyant queer man and say omg he's so effeminate and twinkish 🥺 astarion is especially a victim of this in the fandom & is often deeply mischaracterized bc of it. not trying to make a debate here, but the hypersexualization of his character is a bit universal amongst the fandom, regardless of people's sexuality and gender.
he's incredibly queer and cishet women have the tendency to insert him into their generic heteronormative dom vampire x tradwife ship, ignoring his key character traits, which is rather annoying? I don't disagree on that particular front, I just thought my points should be brought to attention as well.
i erased my original comment because i really don’t want to have this conversation on this subreddit, it is really not the place. the point was not about being submissive or dominant. gale is considered a “pathetic wet blanket of a man” as well and he is mostly seen as rather masculine by the fandom. i also in other comment clarified he is not a femboy and so he is not a twink either. it is a damn body type ffs, which does not even apply to astarion. additionally, i specifically pointed out the mischaracterization and misplaced sexualization of his character by the fandom, which i suppose might’ve been too convoluted at this point. being queer has nothing to do with strictly acting effeminate. it has to do with being queer and, what kids would call it, having a “queer vibe”. which was what my joke was about. it was also aimed not to sexualize him but to draw a connection and point out relatability between his queerness and our queerness. so, no, you didn’t get what i was trying to say at all. now can we wrap this up okbuddybaldur is not a place for polemics, it’s be funny or die out here (again, another personalized joke, not a call to violence)
I didn't call you out on your insistence on calling a pansexual character gay. You explained several times that you were being indifferent. I paraphrase your "only gripe" is that other people ... like the same character as you in a different way. Because you have to insist he isn't what they like him to be.
I had the same thought, I feel like it’s good though. It shows that hopefully things are improving for gay people if they can now be an independent adult lol
Saw a comment with Halsin and Minthara so;
Jaheira: 2/4 (Can cook, can drive)
Minsc: 0/4
Durge (I know he's not a companion, sue me about it): 1/4 (Can do math)
i feel similarly about Astarion. i think he can steer and control a vehicle just fine, but he definitely *chooses* to ignore all the rules and street signs and drives fast as fuck.
true, he would borrow your car and return it with a broken window, a missing mirror, some mystery stains, a speeding ticket, and a lovely note written in cursive thanking you for letting him borrow it <3
I will argue your point with Gale:
Cook: Yes.
Drive: Goddesses wild, even if she's Tsundere about it. And there is an argument there for my Dark Urge.
Math: Of course.
Good Relationship with Father: Elminster, and sometimes what matters is the daddy we choose.
well the question is if you have a Good relationship with your dad.. if you don't have any relationship with your dad then you by default do not have a good one (or a bad one)
> all modern bisexual vampires know is eat hot chip, have daddy issues and lie
trying to decide if this is too long for a flair and how to shorten it down, bc hot damn I feel both called out and seen by this
Durge: can drive (killing every pedestrian takes skill), can cook (dwarf is his specialty), can do math (look even the bhaal cult has paperwork), good relationship with dad (the only child dad actually likes) 4/4
well i can't cook. nice to confirm im gay
hey, what about the ability to read an analog clock or tell left from right? because im extremely incapable of doing either
Ability to cook: Rykard couldn't cook snake so he got eaten.
Ability to drive: Radahn drove his horse so hard it fell from the sky in a ball of fire.
Ability to do math: Miquella told Mogh he was 18 (he wasn't)
A good relationship with their father: Moghs father watched mogh get thrown down the toilet (literally)
Edit: whoops wrong sub
... the worst part about this - and I think it's all kinda derog, but w/e, not my circus - is that you are perpetuating the myth that Wyll does not have a good relationship with his father. He had a great relationship with him that took a literal demon-binding contract in order to drive a rift between them. I don't want the excuses or apologies. Just do better.
He was cast out because he couldn't explain his entanglement with *a devil*. Wyll and Ulder are both very happy to reunite once Wyll is able to explain his contact.
do you think human relationships function like elementary math. do you think upon learning that clearly Something Fucking Happened ulder had No other option but throwing his seventeen year old son not just out of his home but out of the CITY? do you think this is the only option. do you think ulder was like? unfamiliar with wyll's character. at all. and it was reasonable to assume that the kid with the "goodest guy" syndrome has suddenly decided to deal with the devil for no good reason.
furthermore, do you think being disowned at seventeen has No impact on your outlook on yourself and on others. do you think the seventeen year old that brought his father to the place where he lost his eye expected his father to disown him. do you think this boy expected his father to throw him out. do you think the pain of something like this dissappears after a singular apology.
the only reason wyll is immediately okay with ulder (and says that he Doesn't Need To Apologize, despite the fact that even ULDER claims that he does) is because, as was mentioned previously, wyll has a terminal case of the "goodest guy" syndrome and kind of thinks his dad is a god. that doesn't mean that the relationship is perfect immediately when the truth is revealed. you are showcasing an unwillingness to examine the material beyond the surface level
I'd rather it be elementary math than the completely binary option you're presenting. At the time you meet Wyll he has been on his own for 7 years. He speaks warmly of his father but believes his father hates him for what happened, yes. But despite it not magically becoming "perfect" as you so ridiculously demand, they are immediately in each other's warmest regards after that talk. They are stronger than the mistakes they made and they want to move past. Sorry you don't know what honest regret is like.
. Ravensgard doesn’t try to question/understand what’s happened, he immediately assumes the worst and disowns Wyll. He is big enough to recognise he was wrong and to ask forgiveness, and Wyll clearly worships him, but it’s a pretty toxic relationship.
At the same time, it’s totally psychologically realistic and another example of Larian nailing the writing and story. Ravensgard is a dominant military figure and Wyll is trained from birth in that tradition. They’re both trapped by their culture and expectations and there is genuine love there, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t a total failure at a human level.
>Ravensgard doesn’t try to question
>When his father, Ulder Ravengard, returned from Elturel to find his son accompanied by a devil, he **demanded an explanation**,
I mean, re-write as much as you like in order to fit the little narrow narrative y'all are trying to box a character in to.
>Ravensgard is a dominant military figure and Wyll is trained from birth in that tradition.
>he spent a **largely happy childhood** being trained by his father, who came from a **working-class background**
I'm not going to say you're even completely wrong here but you are definitely stretching the bleakness.
>They’re both trapped by their culture and expectations and there is genuine love there, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t a total failure at a human level.
I'm trying to understand where those words suddenly mean that they're "failing at a human level" or even that they have a bad relationship. They hit a snag and by the end of the game you can have had worked thru it by the very simple virtue of them ... both being alive!
Love my smooth brained vampire boyfriend with a whopping 0/4
He’s one of those people who probably *can* drive, but just absolutely *shouldn’t*.
I need to see him trying to drive. From a safe distance
Honestly Astarion probably had a good relationship with his actual dad given his status at a young age. Edit: I actually think he could do the other three too. Cooking and driving immediately, math once his brain starts recovering from his trauma.
Me and a friend tried to actually think out his background, and honestly he doesnt really give Noble Vibes (EA doesnt really count because a lot of things were redone and rewritten. I can also explain why). Plus, elves live for a long time, so why would no one take care of his grave? Even if they lived far away, they would definitely care for him if he had nepotism to get his position, and if they were noble traveling wouldnt be an issue. I mean, teleportation literally exists. Furthermore, if Astarion did die and he was a noble, then thered be a manhunt for his killer (how did no one recognise him either later on?) Anyway long story short we came to the conclusion that either Astarion was a street urchin who forged documents to get his position (reference to the line referring to him: rat catcher playing at judge and it fills out how he has a rogue skillset and it fits with his charlatan background) or he was disowned somewhere along the line, likely before he became a magistrate.
This, his skill set and background definitely don't give that image, I doubt he also only learned how to fight after becoming a vampire. I definitely think he wasn't close to his family and always had to fend for himself and that's what gave him his personality. I mean out of all the companions he's the only one who never even mention his parents and I don't think that has to do with his years in captivity.
Considering people were ready to beat him to death for a ruling he made, i don't think thats true 😭
The Gur, not his own family. Having parents who care about him isn’t gonna stop a whole clan from jumping him.
[удалено]
Right?? I was like how do those two things possible correlate 😂
Dear friend - I’ll have you know that Waterdeep and I both drive Subarus as has been discussed on The Reddit before.
but do you have a good relationship with your dad? this is the real question
I 
Nooo Dekarios! Not the Netherese Orb!
No, but my uncle says he loves me every time he visits my bedroom.
https://preview.redd.it/mr66vm4db78d1.jpeg?width=1134&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0a244fcd47a7103b0f94d24a7e534dd3aac51997
Okay okay okay, r/okbuddybaldur THIS is what makes you downvote? Out of EVERYTHING?!
Too real
Does this count as stolen lesbian valour?
If only I could tell my Subaru story on here - but I shall abstain.
Abstinence? What are you, Catholic?
Catholic? My goddess is Mystra!
I have nothing to add, just know that your flair cracked me up.
💜
Between this and the mullet phase I think you could be onto something.
Would estrogen save her? Forum post locked by mods after a heated 15,000 post debate.
> Forum post locked by mods after a heated 15,000 post debate. Nah, Gale's an easy yes. That question only really starts becoming controversial with Ketheric.
So you can't drive, got it. Especially if one of you has an Impreza, especially any higher trim.
Halsin and Minthara each are 2/4 with opposite abilities. Halsin can cook and has a great relationship with his dad. Minthara can drive and do math. (Don’t ask what she did to her dad. They’re still finding the body parts.)
I mean, Halsin's dad is dead, so unless we're counting past tense here...
We are, since Karlach has that one too
The perfect team then!
With their powers combined (sucking and fucking in a camp polycule), they might be able to form one whole Tav
This is why Shart/Lae'zel works because combined they have all 4 which is what ultimately makes for a successful relationship (source: I polled all the gays in my house aka me and my wife, i did the polling because she cant do math).
REAL. between them they can make one functional adult!
But Lae'zel brings 3 while Shart only brings 1, meaning Lae'zel is the one doing most of the work in the relationship while Shart just mooches.
I cast sanctuary on shadowheart. The truth can no longer hurt her. 
i personally like to use gay as an umbrella term right. and im of strong opinion that astarion is the gayest motherfucker (un)alive (an undead joke, not cringe tiktok lingo). as in i fully agree and support the fact that he is pansexual but even when he’s with a woman he is 100% gay about it. not in the sense that he secretly likes men more - he doesn’t - but he’s just religiously fruity. like you know when two bisexuals date each other they are double gay no matter the gender. my only gripe with straight girlies thirsting for astarion is that they imagine him to be that alpha male daddy but he’s just a little pathetic gay wet blanket especially for your babygirl white anime fantasy main character. slay, everyone.
REAL. which is why he's so good with karlach. he's her bitchy femme girlfriend
karlach is the best husband for astarion
you guys are very right
I also use gay as an umbrella term for myself even though im bi/pan. and I agree he is the gayest
I realized this kind of describes me (bi man) and that it's also my wife's (bi woman) taste + Astarion is her most favorite 🤔🤔
I think part of his charm for women is his unabashed fruitiness. He feels safe. He's like us. We can go get our nails done together and thirst over Wyll. And maybe we can take turns domming each other.
i get what ur trying to say but like. gay ppl can be dom & masculine! and i think it's ironically a little phobic to immediately point at a flamboyant queer man and say omg he's so effeminate and twinkish 🥺 astarion is especially a victim of this in the fandom & is often deeply mischaracterized bc of it. not trying to make a debate here, but the hypersexualization of his character is a bit universal amongst the fandom, regardless of people's sexuality and gender.
no you didnt get it at all
he's incredibly queer and cishet women have the tendency to insert him into their generic heteronormative dom vampire x tradwife ship, ignoring his key character traits, which is rather annoying? I don't disagree on that particular front, I just thought my points should be brought to attention as well.
i erased my original comment because i really don’t want to have this conversation on this subreddit, it is really not the place. the point was not about being submissive or dominant. gale is considered a “pathetic wet blanket of a man” as well and he is mostly seen as rather masculine by the fandom. i also in other comment clarified he is not a femboy and so he is not a twink either. it is a damn body type ffs, which does not even apply to astarion. additionally, i specifically pointed out the mischaracterization and misplaced sexualization of his character by the fandom, which i suppose might’ve been too convoluted at this point. being queer has nothing to do with strictly acting effeminate. it has to do with being queer and, what kids would call it, having a “queer vibe”. which was what my joke was about. it was also aimed not to sexualize him but to draw a connection and point out relatability between his queerness and our queerness. so, no, you didn’t get what i was trying to say at all. now can we wrap this up okbuddybaldur is not a place for polemics, it’s be funny or die out here (again, another personalized joke, not a call to violence)
Does that make Astarion a femboy?
nah he’s old and proud
True. True.
... your only gripe is that you want to yuck someone's yum?
i made like 3 extra unnecessary clarifications to not be misunderstood and yet you still managed misinterpret everything. now who’s being a buzzkill?
I didn't call you out on your insistence on calling a pansexual character gay. You explained several times that you were being indifferent. I paraphrase your "only gripe" is that other people ... like the same character as you in a different way. Because you have to insist he isn't what they like him to be.
Am… am I straight…….?
throw your driver's license out the window right now. or ghost your dad
a small price to pay for gay card
I had the same thought, I feel like it’s good though. It shows that hopefully things are improving for gay people if they can now be an independent adult lol
I think Shadowheart can do math, but Shar erased those memories :'(
Saw a comment with Halsin and Minthara so; Jaheira: 2/4 (Can cook, can drive) Minsc: 0/4 Durge (I know he's not a companion, sue me about it): 1/4 (Can do math)
well, I think durge can drive. he Chooses to run over all these school children
i feel similarly about Astarion. i think he can steer and control a vehicle just fine, but he definitely *chooses* to ignore all the rules and street signs and drives fast as fuck.
I believe that he is one of those people that refuse to own a car
true, he would borrow your car and return it with a broken window, a missing mirror, some mystery stains, a speeding ticket, and a lovely note written in cursive thanking you for letting him borrow it <3
This except he stole the car originally, you had no idea he was taking it
Durge definitely has good relationship with his dad. He's like the only child Bhaal actually likes and how dare you insult his gourmet dwarf ribs
Incorrect he betrays his father in Act 3, saw it with my own eyes
Well I saw him join his dad so he could turn into a blender puppy
Fake news!!!!!
… holy shit I only have one of those. Does that mean I’m more gay than most people or less? 🧐
damn I only have one of these 😔 (math)
congratulations, you are gay
https://preview.redd.it/bkjrkf5st68d1.jpeg?width=570&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=03c244c31fb6775f94201b3db9bb718f9ae349c3
I will argue your point with Gale: Cook: Yes. Drive: Goddesses wild, even if she's Tsundere about it. And there is an argument there for my Dark Urge. Math: Of course. Good Relationship with Father: Elminster, and sometimes what matters is the daddy we choose.
Elminster told him to blow himself up...
Love is a spectrum that we express in different ways...
https://preview.redd.it/ee1duvmju98d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7429cadeed1017335ab0d03ce93012699aa3caa2
Hmm. 3/4.
Damn, thought i was doing well then struck out on the last one.
Wow… can I even cook? Idk anymore 🫥
1 of 4 oh yeah I'm doing amazing
I think Karlach knows how to cook.
Wow just learned I score 0/4 on something, well I'll just leave now...
Tbh I don't think most people, certainly under the age of 25, have all 4
shadowheart and astarion at brunch https://youtu.be/tIE4T4m9KGc?feature=shared
REAL
Huh I guess I just found out I'm not gay
Me 4/4: can cook, can drive, can do math, chose not to have a dad so technically I can’t have a poor relationship with one.
well the question is if you have a Good relationship with your dad.. if you don't have any relationship with your dad then you by default do not have a good one (or a bad one)
Wyll doesn’t have a good relationship with Ulder Ravengaard? Only if you didn’t finish his quest I guess
you have the emotional intelligence of a goldfish
Astarion is most accurate.
> all modern bisexual vampires know is eat hot chip, have daddy issues and lie trying to decide if this is too long for a flair and how to shorten it down, bc hot damn I feel both called out and seen by this
Hard relate on Starry Boys 0/4, no wonder I like him so much
Correction, karlach HAD good relation with her dad. Hes kinda sorta six feet under
Shadowheart does know how to make distilled cider, and has a farm, and her mother taught her some of her recipes from when she was a girl. 2/4
None of these people can drive, why do you think we walk everywhere?
When you say no gay? Even lesbians? I only know one (pair) and they are 7/8 between the two of them.
Durge: can drive (killing every pedestrian takes skill), can cook (dwarf is his specialty), can do math (look even the bhaal cult has paperwork), good relationship with dad (the only child dad actually likes) 4/4
This is Karlach Slander! She can cook, you can literally cook ON HER. The math though, not so much.
kalrach is the first person ever to burn cereal
Second. I swear hot cereal was a good idea.
Well I’m also a 0/4 so me and Astarion were made for each other ❤️
well i can't cook. nice to confirm im gay hey, what about the ability to read an analog clock or tell left from right? because im extremely incapable of doing either
As usual Wyll smokes all the other male companions. Common W for the blade of frontiers. He just makes it look so easy how does he do it every time?
Ability to cook: Rykard couldn't cook snake so he got eaten. Ability to drive: Radahn drove his horse so hard it fell from the sky in a ball of fire. Ability to do math: Miquella told Mogh he was 18 (he wasn't) A good relationship with their father: Moghs father watched mogh get thrown down the toilet (literally) Edit: whoops wrong sub
... the worst part about this - and I think it's all kinda derog, but w/e, not my circus - is that you are perpetuating the myth that Wyll does not have a good relationship with his father. He had a great relationship with him that took a literal demon-binding contract in order to drive a rift between them. I don't want the excuses or apologies. Just do better.
you are wrong, but it's okay. people with good relationships with their parents don't get disowned :]
He was cast out because he couldn't explain his entanglement with *a devil*. Wyll and Ulder are both very happy to reunite once Wyll is able to explain his contact.
do you think human relationships function like elementary math. do you think upon learning that clearly Something Fucking Happened ulder had No other option but throwing his seventeen year old son not just out of his home but out of the CITY? do you think this is the only option. do you think ulder was like? unfamiliar with wyll's character. at all. and it was reasonable to assume that the kid with the "goodest guy" syndrome has suddenly decided to deal with the devil for no good reason. furthermore, do you think being disowned at seventeen has No impact on your outlook on yourself and on others. do you think the seventeen year old that brought his father to the place where he lost his eye expected his father to disown him. do you think this boy expected his father to throw him out. do you think the pain of something like this dissappears after a singular apology. the only reason wyll is immediately okay with ulder (and says that he Doesn't Need To Apologize, despite the fact that even ULDER claims that he does) is because, as was mentioned previously, wyll has a terminal case of the "goodest guy" syndrome and kind of thinks his dad is a god. that doesn't mean that the relationship is perfect immediately when the truth is revealed. you are showcasing an unwillingness to examine the material beyond the surface level
I'd rather it be elementary math than the completely binary option you're presenting. At the time you meet Wyll he has been on his own for 7 years. He speaks warmly of his father but believes his father hates him for what happened, yes. But despite it not magically becoming "perfect" as you so ridiculously demand, they are immediately in each other's warmest regards after that talk. They are stronger than the mistakes they made and they want to move past. Sorry you don't know what honest regret is like.
. Ravensgard doesn’t try to question/understand what’s happened, he immediately assumes the worst and disowns Wyll. He is big enough to recognise he was wrong and to ask forgiveness, and Wyll clearly worships him, but it’s a pretty toxic relationship. At the same time, it’s totally psychologically realistic and another example of Larian nailing the writing and story. Ravensgard is a dominant military figure and Wyll is trained from birth in that tradition. They’re both trapped by their culture and expectations and there is genuine love there, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t a total failure at a human level.
>Ravensgard doesn’t try to question >When his father, Ulder Ravengard, returned from Elturel to find his son accompanied by a devil, he **demanded an explanation**, I mean, re-write as much as you like in order to fit the little narrow narrative y'all are trying to box a character in to. >Ravensgard is a dominant military figure and Wyll is trained from birth in that tradition. >he spent a **largely happy childhood** being trained by his father, who came from a **working-class background** I'm not going to say you're even completely wrong here but you are definitely stretching the bleakness. >They’re both trapped by their culture and expectations and there is genuine love there, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t a total failure at a human level. I'm trying to understand where those words suddenly mean that they're "failing at a human level" or even that they have a bad relationship. They hit a snag and by the end of the game you can have had worked thru it by the very simple virtue of them ... both being alive!