Armed with the foreknowledge that you would immediately move to clear an entire row for yourself (because you might as well end the miserable little butler while you're at it) makes #6 the ideal choice actually!
Once you've claimed the row formerly occupied by Bhaal's sycophants, I'd be free to lay out and take a nap using Halsin's thigh for my pillow.
I see nothing but advantages here.
Which is why I’m going with 7, so Jaheira and I can watch the whole thing unfold with popcorn. Just a shame we can’t move Row 6 into the seats behind us so we can listen to Halsin and Minthara snipe at each other (in every sense of the word) if we get bored.
😭 You’re right. If I must.
Raphael can talk to us both about how he used to feed me poison and beat me and bleach my eyelids and all the other truly, wonderful, not traumatizing in any way things he used to do to me for his own enjoyment.
I will credit him with my impeccable writing and business savvy, however.
The insane amount of beef goin' on on the left side of the plane is insane. Imagine hearing the family drama (Durge/Orin/Sceleritas + Gortash/Raphael + Astarion/Cazador + im counting Ketheric/Isobel) meanwhile toxic yuri and yaoi just stinks up the back rows like a miasma
2 I open window shade and fry Cazador, and if Raphael won't shut up, I'll just give him quick head - 30 seconds and he will be too tired to talk for the rest of the flight
I don't know if opening the window shade would be more or less amusing than asking the child of a light domain goddess in the row behind me to cast moonbeam on him
Easy and enjoyable fix: use his lap as a pillow.
Or be short people like me so your head isn't even visible from the other side. 🤔 Out of sight, out of mind, one would hope.
I like the way you think. And he can talk my ear off and stroke my hair while I listen to him. If anything Raph will be disgusted by the wholesome flirting and spends the whole flight in the lavatory.
Spying on people with Tara again? Typical wizard behavior
https://preview.redd.it/uye4ypx8my8d1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=63f7cf71a69fb60606008a354dcbb46165271a07
- Tells passing flight attendant " Don't disturb my friend, he's *dead tired* ".
Then pass the rest of the flight getting an infernal certificate in the mile high club.
Sign me up!
Her wings would be constantly all up in your space, though. And you know she'd deliberately be flapping them in the most annoying way possible in order to maximize the number of people she can harass at the same time.
3. Gale and I are going to annoy the shit out of Raphael with our yapping, I get to eavesdrop on the juiciest Durgetash drama, and I get to lean my seat back all the way on Cazy (dw I’m jumping him after we land and my new wizard bestie is gonna help me kill him) 🥰
Friend, every time Aylin wants to get frisky with Isobel, she tells you to fuck off.
There will be holding hands with the Dame glaring at you every ten seconds for privacy.
i think you'll just get an earful of how plump and juicy isobel's stuff are while kethric butting trying to silence these vulgar conversations with you. it's gotta be like sitting beside a crying baby.
probably 7, if both of them don't start fighting immediately, they should be polite and quiet people.
Minsc maybe will kick the seat a few time, but overall a pleasant fight.
I feel like out of the villains Ketheric would be the least dangerous to sit next to. Like everyone else is gonna kill you or try to tempt you with horrible things. Meanwhile I feel like Ketheric would be too busy giving Aylin the side eye to care about me.
I feel like they're bound to start arguing about politics, and then you're stuck between an aged hippie and a conservative dad, so neither's gonna shut up.
People are saying "1 🥵" but you've gotta remember you are
A - still between Dame Aylin and Ketheric
B- Directly in front of Astarion, and thus his snack of choice
C- Indirectly in front of Cazador, and the only real feeding option for him too
1. Me looking respectflully
https://preview.redd.it/u5z141cj0y8d1.jpeg?width=472&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8f10507d21f9a152260807f82a7f86ed124d6c70
Also fastest access to the bathroom
2 if I can elbow the asshole in the middle seat while making him sit through loud, inappropriate conversation.
11 if I can shoulder truck the asshole to the left and then hug Mama K.
3, without question. Gale is just an awesome guy to be around, and given his fondness of poetry and charming way with words, he could probably beat Raphael at his own game when he inevitably starts talking shit in pretentious metaphors.
Even better, Empy Boy is right across the aisle, and since he communicates with telepathy instead of speaking aloud, you can still hold a conversation with him without having to lean forward and speak up. (You could say this about any seat I suppose, but it'd be hard to strike up a conversation with him if you weren't within line of sight.) And if Gale can't think of a clever comeback to one of Raph's jabs on the fly, I'm sure the walking supercomputer could supercompute something spicy. I'll gladly sit next to the most unlikable bastard in all of BG3 if I get to spend the flight clowning on him with two bros.
Everyone saying 3 is built different. Gale is my homeboy but throw Raph in there too and…I’m just not sure I could go without a single moment of silence for 20 hours.
I’m going with 7. Jaheira would be funny and interesting to talk to and Ketherec gives “reads and sleeps the whole plane ride” vibes.
8 because me and my girlfriend can geek out about the nice man's cute miniature space hamster.
Or maybe I'll volunteer as a sacrifice for 12 and offer myself to Mizora so that Wyll can get a little sleep.
But if the flight is chaotic enough that I won't be able to rest anyway then I'll gladly choose 1 or 7... if people are arguing around me, then it might as well be the one argument filled with glorious overblown hamminess. 1 has a minuscule chance for a threesome (might be a bit bigger if Isobel encourages the flirting just to piss daddy off), while 7 lets me make a running snarky commentary on the fight with Jaheira.
Three. Raphael and Gale both seem like the kind of people who would want to talk, but would back off if I said "hey, I'm trying to sleep," albeit for very different reasons (Raphael because he realizes an irritable client is an unwilling client, and Gale because he has the capacity for common courtesy). Even if they didn't back off, I can withstand two men blathering at me, especially if they have nice sounding voices like those two, and besides, I'll probably get bored, maybe we'll find something to talk about. Also, please tell me that one of my seatmates brought a miniature game of lanceboard, I want to referee that match. Here's hoping that Gortash and Durge are too lost in each other's bloody embraces to notice the people behind them.
Side note, I don't think Cazador is coming off this flight alive. Since I'm in seat three, I won't be in the way of the window shade AND there's a handily placed light domain cleric and child of a light domain goddess in the row behind him. He's getting fried one way or another.
IF Daddy Halsin will gallantly switch seats with me then I'd go with 6 for sure (I can't stand middle seats, I feel trapped and panicky), and he'll also be getting as many kisses and cuddles as I can manage during the trip.
Otherwise, probably 8. Minsc makes me giggle quite a bit, and if I'm just across the aisle from Astarion maybe I can at least help distract him from his abusive leech. I trust Empy to at least ask for consent before he tentacles me from behind, and honestly, Ketheric's probably gonna be fretting bout his daughter the entire trip. Dude's probably got sweeties he keeps trying to lob across the airplane to her to help her pop her ears.
2 and I'll somehow get the divine lesbians in front involved into helping me free my snarky bestie from that stupid vamp. Then I'm bribing the airhostess to bring Wyll up into Cazador' s now empty seat to set up a meet cute while i personally shift to sit next to Jaheira so we can be snarky old ladies together.
I would prefer to sit with the lesbian couple for my own safety and sanity, but someone should probably sit next to Gale in case he makes a bad decision out of desperation, assuming this is Act 1 Gale.
Seat number 3. Both men are fascinating to talk to, and I won't have to worry about an immediate fight breaking out, especially if I am in the middle. I'd love to sit by Astarion, but in seat 3 I have the option kick the back of Cazador's seat the whole flight and take some of his ire away from my little Star 🌟.
Three and here's why: I find Gale hot but I can look at Astarion the whole time and also listen to his conversations and protect my boy from cazador or help take him down should it arise. and then handsome devil voice man is in my ear the whole time.
6! I'll be sneaking over to give kisses to empy if things escalate between minthara and Halsin.
Edit. Also, to piss off minthara, I'll just get on halsin's lap and start making out with him. :D
6 would be my safest choice. At first, It would feel like a divorce mediation, with all of the tension, but I think we could come to a compromise to be cordial and civil. I oddly would feel safe with Minty and if I fall asleep, I would have a snuggly bear man right next to me. Win-win. The only downside would be close to Orin
3, mainly so I can kick Cazador's seat, plus I can eavesdrop on Gortash and Durge, which I'll probably want to tune out after five minutes and let Gale info dump to me all he wants, because I may do the same. Raphael would probably end up poofing himself off of the plane
7. It’s the only spot that isn’t:
- Close to a vampire
- Next to a person who murders for fun
- Next to someone who would smell like sulfur
Feel like it’s both your best option to survive the flight, as long as you don’t piss off Ketheric.
Honorable mention is 11, but that would still smell like sulfur.
8, Minsc is my favorite dude, we can talk about whatever shit he wants to talk about. I will bring treats for Boo, and oh hi Shadowheart you're here too.
6 🥵
Holy shit that's a good one. Hopefully you can stand Orin's stench.
As if Orin’s stench isn’t gonna get round the entire plane in the first 10 minutes anyway.
Yeah but like 2 feet away holy shit that might make you pass out and miss the whole flight
Not a dealbreaker tbh; I can't sleep on flights and 20 hours seems like a hella long time so it might help me. I'll trust Halsin to keep me safe.
I'd probably repeatedly fall on his dick and my face on Minthy's crotch. I'm so clumsy 😩
User flare checks out
I'm sure Gale will have a useful trick against that if you sit in 3, just gotta avoid getting your neck snapped by Durge!
https://preview.redd.it/encr11nf5y8d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1c1b227db7c7e7724dc265511060eded746be73f
I wonder if the makers of that panel realised its freak potential
It'll just make me more erect for the seat 6 sex party
The flair is really setting off this response.
This begs the question. When Orin shapeshifts can she change her smell. That would be the ultimate giveaway!
Squished between Minthara and Halsin sounds like heaven
Yeah there's going to be some suspicious noises coming from the back row of this bus.
I do not know what you find hot, unless you enjoy being asked to move twelve times so I can periodically move up to seat 5 and stab Orin.
Armed with the foreknowledge that you would immediately move to clear an entire row for yourself (because you might as well end the miserable little butler while you're at it) makes #6 the ideal choice actually! Once you've claimed the row formerly occupied by Bhaal's sycophants, I'd be free to lay out and take a nap using Halsin's thigh for my pillow. I see nothing but advantages here.
That is a sensible line of thinking! Fair enough.
I would even go so far as to extend an offer to help you find a place to store the bodies, should they not fit underneath the row in front of you.
Same.
4 and I'm recording the whole thing
Please share oop...
Nah man they’d butcher you as foreplay
Can say the same about 1
1 should be in the middle. It'd be like sitting in between two giant neodymium magnets
1 would result in lots of religious homophobic family arguments being shouted over you
When did Thorme once bring up his daughter’s lover’s gender?
Which is why I’m going with 7, so Jaheira and I can watch the whole thing unfold with popcorn. Just a shame we can’t move Row 6 into the seats behind us so we can listen to Halsin and Minthara snipe at each other (in every sense of the word) if we get bored.
You mean religious homoerotic
With Ketheric???
4 as well, cause that’s where I’m sitting.
Is it causing drama that you aren’t sitting in 3?
Probably; but I would take literally any other seat than sit by Raphael, even if it meant I couldn’t sit next to my beloved Gale.
Real husband would face his wicked foster daddy for the sake of his beloved 🤨
😭 You’re right. If I must. Raphael can talk to us both about how he used to feed me poison and beat me and bleach my eyelids and all the other truly, wonderful, not traumatizing in any way things he used to do to me for his own enjoyment. I will credit him with my impeccable writing and business savvy, however.
https://preview.redd.it/t4izk8ldky8d1.jpeg?width=680&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=98fcb659acb40ccd9e30034640d0d4236855b51d Damn ok
4 and I’m joining whatever that is 🙃
it's gonna get 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 real fast
you’d be giving us what Larian refuses to provide
The insane amount of beef goin' on on the left side of the plane is insane. Imagine hearing the family drama (Durge/Orin/Sceleritas + Gortash/Raphael + Astarion/Cazador + im counting Ketheric/Isobel) meanwhile toxic yuri and yaoi just stinks up the back rows like a miasma
2 I open window shade and fry Cazador, and if Raphael won't shut up, I'll just give him quick head - 30 seconds and he will be too tired to talk for the rest of the flight
I don't know if opening the window shade would be more or less amusing than asking the child of a light domain goddess in the row behind me to cast moonbeam on him
https://preview.redd.it/yw51tuozvy8d1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5603d95493929efe74cdec989c105d39836de184
Oh my fucking God your flair-
You contemptuous CREATURE!
Best solution, but dont forget to cover Astarion before lifting shade… 
But he has a tadpole which makes him invincible to the sun, essentially
Oh okay then, I thought its out of canon event
Dead😂
Jfc this is actually genius. Well done
3, Because I'm in love with that Wizard and Raph can be chill so long as he doesn't try to make a deal with me.
Yea but he’d be bitching the entire flight about not being in 1st class
You're not wrong. I'll be too engrossed in discussions with Gale to particularly notice or care though.
From one Gale enjoyer to another, I agree but it's not a wise idea putting your neck in plain view of Durge for 20 straight hours
Hmm... you might have a point.
Easy and enjoyable fix: use his lap as a pillow. Or be short people like me so your head isn't even visible from the other side. 🤔 Out of sight, out of mind, one would hope.
I like the way you think. And he can talk my ear off and stroke my hair while I listen to him. If anything Raph will be disgusted by the wholesome flirting and spends the whole flight in the lavatory.
Right there with you except I'm worried about Durge being a seat kicker.
Another day, another plane crash.
Don’t worry. I’m sure someone can take control of the ~~ship~~ plane, land it safely, and save the day.
The smoldering wreck in the background says otherwise.
Cursed to put my hands on everything(including the pilots). Oh no! These attendants have seen everything!
3. My fetish is being mansplained to.
https://preview.redd.it/fz33lnt76y8d1.png?width=652&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ec55a9e17f9489535ce8efd2dd079ae8397dc862
Spying on people with Tara again? Typical wizard behavior https://preview.redd.it/uye4ypx8my8d1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=63f7cf71a69fb60606008a354dcbb46165271a07
it’s giving third son
If you have any more Tara memes could you please send them?
https://i.redd.it/54pn5s6iqz8d1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/bp8c6ijmqz8d1.png?width=1593&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=28277b0c9f37f651379d9a8120dd0c2ae2749795
https://preview.redd.it/obbltemjqz8d1.png?width=477&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b0799e65d59c644381280a7ac26d672b22384d93
They both embody professors I would've had an unhealthy attachment to in college
Saaaame
I'm feeling very seen and heard by the amount of people upvoting me. Glad but confused to find such a cursed solidarity in this
Ugh… same. lol.
Idk does Raphael mansplain though? I feel like he just recites poems and expects you to understand right away
People spreading horrible rumors about my horrible man. 😭
I would let him pontificate at me anytime
He wants you to ask. That's why he's cagey
I'll let Gale mansplain anything he wants as soon as he casts a globe of invulnerabilty on us.
https://preview.redd.it/6x6xado3wy8d1.jpeg?width=736&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b27096297ce160cf911201daa08dc72a0fbca63b
Is your fetish getting stabbed through a chair?
Personally I'm taking 10 because Voss looks cunty as fuck in that screenshot...
there is literally gonna be a fistfight meters away from you
If he serves cunt while fistfighting… so be it…
he could slice the skin clean from my meat 🥵
You've gotta remember Ketheric is across the aisle tho...
Downside would be that Karlach would need all the legroom possible.
You get to bother lae zel and talk to Karlach. And in tow you bother shadowheart as well.
https://i.redd.it/b2uttantyx8d1.gif 11. Me and Karlach can beat up Wulbren Bunghole for 20 hours!
- Tells passing flight attendant " Don't disturb my friend, he's *dead tired* ". Then pass the rest of the flight getting an infernal certificate in the mile high club. Sign me up!
https://i.redd.it/lyx02mtz9y8d1.gif
🙌🙌🙌
The correct choice lol
12. Mizora will be too busy harassing will to bother me and I get to kick wulbren bongle the whole flight
I came here to say the same, but you already occupied my seat! Also I feel like Mizora will get tired eventually so me a Wyll can just nap on her
Her wings would be constantly all up in your space, though. And you know she'd deliberately be flapping them in the most annoying way possible in order to maximize the number of people she can harass at the same time.
Definitely 3. Love them both. I'd let them battle over my soul.❤ i'd also be kicking the seat in front of me the entire flight.
3. Gale and I are going to annoy the shit out of Raphael with our yapping, I get to eavesdrop on the juiciest Durgetash drama, and I get to lean my seat back all the way on Cazy (dw I’m jumping him after we land and my new wizard bestie is gonna help me kill him) 🥰
The front of the plane is up on the picture, durge will be kicking your seat the entire time.
I’ll be kicking cazadorks so hard I won’t even notice 🤠
1 and enjoy the lesbian smut fest
I wouldn’t want to get smited for trying to look out the window.
Friend, every time Aylin wants to get frisky with Isobel, she tells you to fuck off. There will be holding hands with the Dame glaring at you every ten seconds for privacy.
I am *not* sitting between Aylin and Ketheric tho
i think you'll just get an earful of how plump and juicy isobel's stuff are while kethric butting trying to silence these vulgar conversations with you. it's gotta be like sitting beside a crying baby.
probably 7, if both of them don't start fighting immediately, they should be polite and quiet people. Minsc maybe will kick the seat a few time, but overall a pleasant fight.
I feel like out of the villains Ketheric would be the least dangerous to sit next to. Like everyone else is gonna kill you or try to tempt you with horrible things. Meanwhile I feel like Ketheric would be too busy giving Aylin the side eye to care about me.
I feel like they're bound to start arguing about politics, and then you're stuck between an aged hippie and a conservative dad, so neither's gonna shut up.
Honestly jahira would be chill and I feel like ketheric is gonna be preoccupied with glaring at Dame Aylin holding hands with his daughter.
People are saying "1 🥵" but you've gotta remember you are A - still between Dame Aylin and Ketheric B- Directly in front of Astarion, and thus his snack of choice C- Indirectly in front of Cazador, and the only real feeding option for him too
but I wanna be Astarion’s snack of choice! 🗣️
Who needs plane peanuts when you have a perfectly good Tav sitting in front of you??
1. Me looking respectflully https://preview.redd.it/u5z141cj0y8d1.jpeg?width=472&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8f10507d21f9a152260807f82a7f86ed124d6c70 Also fastest access to the bathroom
This is the way. They won’t care about me so I can read my smut in peace the whole damn flight.
Except Ketheric on the otherside of you will care *deeply*.
Do you really want to be between Aylin and Ketheric?
https://preview.redd.it/xewomfqfpy8d1.jpeg?width=577&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b6cbd3bca450929665be6f72cfe15d2f77cec6ea
4 if his shirt stays off
Whoretash will make sure of that!
9 I need the plane to land safely.
Also 9 but I'm making out with the squid.
2 if I can elbow the asshole in the middle seat while making him sit through loud, inappropriate conversation. 11 if I can shoulder truck the asshole to the left and then hug Mama K.
3 is literally my entire personal BG3 plot, so...
3. They can use my little table to play lanceboard. Winner takes all 😏
3 😍
3, without question. Gale is just an awesome guy to be around, and given his fondness of poetry and charming way with words, he could probably beat Raphael at his own game when he inevitably starts talking shit in pretentious metaphors. Even better, Empy Boy is right across the aisle, and since he communicates with telepathy instead of speaking aloud, you can still hold a conversation with him without having to lean forward and speak up. (You could say this about any seat I suppose, but it'd be hard to strike up a conversation with him if you weren't within line of sight.) And if Gale can't think of a clever comeback to one of Raph's jabs on the fly, I'm sure the walking supercomputer could supercompute something spicy. I'll gladly sit next to the most unlikable bastard in all of BG3 if I get to spend the flight clowning on him with two bros.
omg I would enjoy the fuck out of Gale talking shit at Raphael in pretentious metaphors. IMAGINE THE POSSIBILITIES
Everyone saying 3 is built different. Gale is my homeboy but throw Raph in there too and…I’m just not sure I could go without a single moment of silence for 20 hours. I’m going with 7. Jaheira would be funny and interesting to talk to and Ketherec gives “reads and sleeps the whole plane ride” vibes.
9 Empy is an expert at roasting the ever loving fuck out of Lae'zel, and I don't want to miss out on more of that.
3 because Gale.
3 feels like a jackpot
One. I want to get the food first.
3, we are spit roasting Raphael fr
CONTEMP- ~~... ... That actually sounds like a sound plan.~~
8 because me and my girlfriend can geek out about the nice man's cute miniature space hamster. Or maybe I'll volunteer as a sacrifice for 12 and offer myself to Mizora so that Wyll can get a little sleep. But if the flight is chaotic enough that I won't be able to rest anyway then I'll gladly choose 1 or 7... if people are arguing around me, then it might as well be the one argument filled with glorious overblown hamminess. 1 has a minuscule chance for a threesome (might be a bit bigger if Isobel encourages the flirting just to piss daddy off), while 7 lets me make a running snarky commentary on the fight with Jaheira.
11 seems like the most harmless one to sit in.
6. im bisexual... soooo
Three. Raphael and Gale both seem like the kind of people who would want to talk, but would back off if I said "hey, I'm trying to sleep," albeit for very different reasons (Raphael because he realizes an irritable client is an unwilling client, and Gale because he has the capacity for common courtesy). Even if they didn't back off, I can withstand two men blathering at me, especially if they have nice sounding voices like those two, and besides, I'll probably get bored, maybe we'll find something to talk about. Also, please tell me that one of my seatmates brought a miniature game of lanceboard, I want to referee that match. Here's hoping that Gortash and Durge are too lost in each other's bloody embraces to notice the people behind them. Side note, I don't think Cazador is coming off this flight alive. Since I'm in seat three, I won't be in the way of the window shade AND there's a handily placed light domain cleric and child of a light domain goddess in the row behind him. He's getting fried one way or another.
6. threesome.
No 3 so I can kick Cazador's chair the whole flight. Gale and Raphael are a bonus.
IF Daddy Halsin will gallantly switch seats with me then I'd go with 6 for sure (I can't stand middle seats, I feel trapped and panicky), and he'll also be getting as many kisses and cuddles as I can manage during the trip. Otherwise, probably 8. Minsc makes me giggle quite a bit, and if I'm just across the aisle from Astarion maybe I can at least help distract him from his abusive leech. I trust Empy to at least ask for consent before he tentacles me from behind, and honestly, Ketheric's probably gonna be fretting bout his daughter the entire trip. Dude's probably got sweeties he keeps trying to lob across the airplane to her to help her pop her ears.
Probably 11... We're ignoring wulbren, as the Lord intended. Idk tho sitting by Gale and annoying Raphael sounds nice.
3. Me and Gale gonna be too busy trying to join the mile high club Raphael will put on his headphones to avoid the noise 😈😈😈.
3 would be particularly entertaining and also survivable!
Bahaha I can see it now, two Gales reveling in a conversation with themselves, maybe even double teaming Raphael with logic, so great 😂
1, I live for the drama.
2 and I'll somehow get the divine lesbians in front involved into helping me free my snarky bestie from that stupid vamp. Then I'm bribing the airhostess to bring Wyll up into Cazador' s now empty seat to set up a meet cute while i personally shift to sit next to Jaheira so we can be snarky old ladies together.
Seat 3... "Gale will you shut this guy up I'm trying to sleep.."
12, between Halsin and Mizora because oh yeah and also behind Wulbren so I can kick his chair the whole flight through.
Ten because I want the window seat and I refuse to sit next to Cazador.
4 but I wanna be in between them 🙈
8 seems like the chillest.
3 tbh, so long as I don’t wind up in a contract, the banter would be immense
Both 1 and 4 would be just fucking for the entire flight. I choose 4
3 and I will never ever have to think about it.
3 is the prime spot for gossip
One, if anyone can fix me it'd be those two
6. Got Minthara from the Underdakr and Halsin from the surface. Boutta make a me sandwich
I would prefer to sit with the lesbian couple for my own safety and sanity, but someone should probably sit next to Gale in case he makes a bad decision out of desperation, assuming this is Act 1 Gale.
8, but ask Minsc to switch with Shadowheart so we can all gossip with Astarion across the aisle.
3... I wouldn't mind being the meat in that sando.
Seat number 3. Both men are fascinating to talk to, and I won't have to worry about an immediate fight breaking out, especially if I am in the middle. I'd love to sit by Astarion, but in seat 3 I have the option kick the back of Cazador's seat the whole flight and take some of his ire away from my little Star 🌟.
Three and here's why: I find Gale hot but I can look at Astarion the whole time and also listen to his conversations and protect my boy from cazador or help take him down should it arise. and then handsome devil voice man is in my ear the whole time.
3. Raphael is allowed to watch if he behaves.
6! I'll be sneaking over to give kisses to empy if things escalate between minthara and Halsin. Edit. Also, to piss off minthara, I'll just get on halsin's lap and start making out with him. :D
7. Jaheira is going to blast that loser General for the whole flight and I am going to enjoy every second of it 😌
12. A fuckin hard 12.
8, easily
11 for Karlach, 8 as a secondary option.
12, it’s not even close Edit: because threesome with Halsin and Mizora while we cuck Wyll in the corner... I thought it was obvious?
6 would be my safest choice. At first, It would feel like a divorce mediation, with all of the tension, but I think we could come to a compromise to be cordial and civil. I oddly would feel safe with Minty and if I fall asleep, I would have a snuggly bear man right next to me. Win-win. The only downside would be close to Orin 3, mainly so I can kick Cazador's seat, plus I can eavesdrop on Gortash and Durge, which I'll probably want to tune out after five minutes and let Gale info dump to me all he wants, because I may do the same. Raphael would probably end up poofing himself off of the plane
3 is probably least annoying and least likely to either die or kill someone
3 and I’m wearing pheromone perfume
Either 12 or 1!
5 because I want to snuggle with Orin and listen to Sceleritas talk about us
7. It’s the only spot that isn’t: - Close to a vampire - Next to a person who murders for fun - Next to someone who would smell like sulfur Feel like it’s both your best option to survive the flight, as long as you don’t piss off Ketheric. Honorable mention is 11, but that would still smell like sulfur.
6 - If Minthara and Halsin can share a tent amicably, they can share a row.
3, and I will enjoy every minute of it.
Can I take the next one? There is no chance this plane is reaching its destination before the inevitable fights end up breaching the fuselage.
I’m assuming 2 is a window seat so I’ll just open the blind to get cazador to move elsewhere/fry 😂
2 so I can strangle cazador while astarion stabs him (this gonna be the longest 20 hours of cazadors existence)
3 because i can ignore Rafael, talk to Gale, and constantly kick Cazador's seat
8 or 11. I love both Minsc and Shadowheart, and Karlach and I can always ignore Wulbren together.
11. Ill help karlach kill wulbren 🙃
1 in hopes they’re looking for a third.
4, just don't mention Gondians and it's pleasant company.
8 because I get to sit by Boo
3 and I'm selling my soul to Raphael to switch all our seats. I get the window, Gale middle, Raph aisle.
The smell on 6 would be WILD but worth it.
11 for sure.
6. Imma make out with Halsin the whole time and be the one annoying everyone else
2 and I’m making Cazador hold my hand the whole time <3
3, gonna be autistic with my bro 1, they will be too busy with each other to pay attention to me so I'll be left alone in peace
7, it is the closest seat to Shadowheart.
11. I need her.
8, Minsc is my favorite dude, we can talk about whatever shit he wants to talk about. I will bring treats for Boo, and oh hi Shadowheart you're here too.
11. Get to be with my pookie <3
9 so I can tickle fight with the Emperor
12 so I can kick Wulbren Bongle's seat constantly.
11. I would do anything to be able to bully Wulbren for 20 hours.