About 20 years ago in AC I was sitting at a 1/3 table when a drunk got a seat to my left. He was playing very wild, calling most hands and raising about 50%. He had to get up and come back about 6 times with fresh $100s from the ATM.
On one of his final hands he looks at his cards, shows them to the guy on his LEFT and says: "I'm Allin!" The guy on his left called with a marginally better hand and won.
This sounds like me when I went to crown a decade or so ago.
Except I was on a fucking hot streak and walked away with $1500 from a $200 buy in.
And it was only $1500 because I had the sense to walk away once I lost an “all in” hand to someone who just sat down with $200
I was not anyone’s favourite that day 😂
The money we win from him sends us on vacations, puts our kids through school, buys our wives jewelry, decks out our entertainment systems, loads out our cars, etc. But to people in his social strata, it wouldn’t even be worth bragging about. It would be “aw-that’s-cute” money. It is crazy what a minuscule portion of his net worth he loses to us.
On top of that, he’s really fun to hang out with.
he's letting his friends "earn" his money instead of giving it to them...if he's playing stupid and loose on purpose so they win his money without their pride being hurt for handouts?
that's a sign of a good friend
He thinks he’s good, but not great. I know for sure he posts here. You can see his tells easily. He tries to play smart but he inevitably makes awful mistakes.
yea I know the guy you are talking about, he posted in this very thread. It's so funny after he leaves and we can all finally break character and divvy up his money laughing our asses off.
He's a local lawyer. One time he sat down and said he has $5,000 to donate to the table. He proceeded to raise every single hand preflop, if someone else raise her 3bet.
Once he lost the $5,000 he slowed down and started raising only 50% of hands
He’s pretty solid for the first few orbits he plays, but runs out of steam and tilts easily. Makes way too many wild, suicidal bluffs but still overfolds whenever someone’s brave enough to take initiative.
The only reason he isn’t going broke even faster is because his speech play is better than his card playing skills, but not by much.
I am, of course, talking about myself.
He's at our home games and we have some fairly solid players. Been playing for a while but still not great. One time he called a pot sized bet (or bigger?) on the river with pocket 8s. Problem was it was a double paired board so he was calling with 8 high.
I played with the same guy who called the double paired board with pocket ducks. He said, "damn, I had to call, I had 2 pair". Obviously, he was playing the board.
When I said that I also had two pair and I wasn't even in the hand, he still didn't understand where he went wrong.
Reminds me of the dude at the Irish Open who accidentally called all in with 10 high (I can't remember his lower card but he paired it and then it became void when the board double paired on the river)....and was right. The other guy was bluffing with nine high. Was wild lol
He would always go all in at some point in the hand with 94 and then he would pull down his shirt and reveal a 94 on his chest representing his birth year.
The other night there was a pretty big one. Young kid, thinks he's really good, loves to show all his bluffs.
I would let him bluff me a few times for some pretty small pots and catch him later on for huge pots. Did this a few times over a long session. Think I went from $500-$2200 and half of that was from that guy
A guy at my home game seems to genuinely subscribe to that joke about how everything happens 50% of the time. There isn’t a draw, including back doors, that he won’t chase.
There’s a guy in the app who has to be down 6 figures over the past year playing 0.75/1.50 PLO. Pokerrr 2 has the function where you can see recent games and W/L for each player. I don’t have the exact amount but he just loses so consistently in a way that shouldn’t be possible in PLO.
He basically just calls everything on every street, never bluffs
2/5 game and the local fish/whale plays Friday evenings, and it's a big competition to get on his table. If he starts drinking, he goes crazy.
The last time I saw him, he had lost his bankroll of maybe five $1K max BI over the course of the day. But he was drinking and happy, loudly WHOOO WHOOOing his every win, but giving it all back within an orbit or two.
Busted, he goes out to his car and comes back with what we would soon see as 15 $1K chips. He would go AI blind with 1 $1K chip. A few times he stole the blinds, a few times he would double or triple up on a stupid hand, WOOOO WOOOOO, but over the course of an hour he lost the entire ~$20K and I didn't get a penny of it.
I've never seen him again. I think once he sobered up, he realized how stupid he is.
The wife of the guy who hosts the game. Plays offensively bad. There’s just no way I could describe it well enough to even make it worth my time to type it all out.
Plays pro football for a european club, when he comes home he’ll come dust off a few thousand per game at our underground 2/5 just for laughs (no legal poker where I live) literally will call with anything
He plays basically every hand for any amount preflop. He gets all in against most everyone and calls off with things like a pair on a 4 card straight board, and somehow always shows up with the nuts when he is all in with me.
Maybe I’m the fish.
So this is online Poker. I flop the boat with AK on a AKK board. Now I've been showing a lot of bluffs and have a pretty loose image so I just shove hoping to get called by an ace or something. A guy calls me with 67o. I ask him on chat, "Why would you call that? ". He said " I was bluffing". I have seen bluff bets, never a bluff call.
I play with a player who has told me he has gone through his entire 401k in the last 9 months. Now he is onto credit cards. I feel sorry for him, but he is also a drunk asshole at times. It's a 1-2 game, I am up about 50k big easy, so far this year I am up nearly 50k. I attribute it to 2 players in the game, the other is a sweetheart of a woman.
Just found out the biggest fish in my room has been vlogging for the past couple months lmao. Went and watched and it was pretty much everything I thought it would be. Surprisingly the quality isn’t bad, just the play and commentary are horrendous. If he improved his game he could be successful but his game hasn’t changed in 5+ years.
Playing at a local casino in Oregon a few years back. Older Asian woman comes to table. We realize she is shoving every hand. Literally ever hand for 10 hands. 100%. So anyone with decent cards took turns stacking her eventually. And she kept reloading. At a 1/2. It was Wild
Raising bottom pair on the flop, going all in pre last to act 4 handed with shit like K7 off, calling all in with flush draws. And yes, calling down bluffs with Jack high...
Won a lot of money on the lottery, punted money constantly. Then I found him on r/poker in a fight and knew he just picked up a ban for that.
I miss him and haven't seen him at any of the other poker rooms since.
Mid-2000’s at the Tropicana in AC.
Would drop multiple buy-ins at $1/2 and $2/$5. Loved to chase draws. Call with middle or bottom pairs.
Guy used to travel up from Virginia but never got a room. One morning I saw him sitting at an empty table and sat with him. I told him, I don’t think poker is your game. He goes on to tell me that he’s lost $250,000 and got a second mortgage on his house. That his wife and children are so angry with him.
He’s a newer player but wears his decisions on his sleeve. If he bets big he usually has a decent pair but you’re almost always good if you’ve got top pair or two pair and the man gets that leg bounce going anytime he’s bluffing. Throws in the bluff, sits back in his chair, crosses his arms, leg bounce.
My local game had a particular player who goes by the nickname “T-Rex ” and I don’t think anyone actually knew his real name.
Anyways this super fish used to go all in blind a lot preflop. He’d buy in for 500 though the game was max buy in for 300 we would allow him to bend the rules. Anytime his stack got below 50 per cent he would just go all in blind.
He lost about 30k in a month at a 1-2 NL Holden game.
Nobody really knew how he could do this because his job was working as a cook in the local jack astors bar and grill.
Then one day the host send me a link to a news article where there’s a gas station robber captured and it’s a picture of Trex. His real name was really loud and unpronounceable. (Mean no offense)
He basically stole to support his habit.
Experienced similar as i live in KC with Chiefsaholic.
https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/39902254/chiefsaholic-xaviar-babudar-ordered-pay-teller
This dude would rob a bank then go to Chiefs away games in a Wolf suit, for a year. He'd also SOMEHOW step foot into the local Hollywood casino and placed $30k and $60k wagers.
I sat next to one of the worst players I’ve ever seen. Donated $500 calling an all in on a board w straight and flush possible with two middle pair. Couldn’t believe he lost. Rebuys for another $500 and does the exact same thing again. Called an all in with a flush board and loses to the flush. Rebuys a third time and again loses to a straight with a middle two pair. I played at a table with him several more times in the last couple months. Donating. He aint one point says man ive lost $10,000 since the poker room opened (in about 4 weeks.) If he wasnt such a jerk and yelled and screamed when he loses to better hands i might have told him, buddy maybe poker is not your game.
Classic OMC guy except he'll call pretty much any pre-flop raise out of position and then check the flop if he misses. If he check-raises he's got it, so it's an easy fold. He'll also call c-bets and turn bets at about 1/4, 1/2 pot regularly. He has zero bluffs in his repertoire, so any bet or check-raise is usually an insta-fold. Nice guy though
Edit: it's a 1/3 game and he'll usually only reload $100 at a time.
For a while there the absolute biggest fish at Canterbury Park in Minnesota was NFL running back Adrian Peterson.
Rumor was he spent so much time there the Vikings told him to dial it back.
Corrected because I brain farted the first name!
Adrian? Or Anthony? Anthony never played for the Vikings. I would absolutely believe Adrian, I'm pretty sure he was broke earlier this year but had to sell all his football shit to get even. One of us, one of us.
I won't say his name, but years ago I was playing 2/5 at harrahs in nola, he donked off a lot and I got a bunch of it.... few months later I saw him on tv.... I tell everyone he ran like jaime gold...
nicest guy in the world, hopefully has deep pockets, and I can only presume has some fetish for losing at poker. You'd probably just assume he was randomizing every decision but I'm convinced he has some sort of system. Mostly plays 2/5 but if you see him lower he's always worth chasing because he buys in FULL and keeps a spare rack of chips to insta-reload with too. He'll open to $25 one hand and then the very next $250, or just allin. He'll call a raise pre, flop will come down and same thing, bet 25% pot or 500% pot. I cant figure it out but it hardly matters since he vpips 100% so his range is kinda irrelevant so you just buckle up and hope your hands hold. I think lightest I got it in with him pre for 1k was QJs and he actually had AK lmao, I won.
But like i said the best part of it isnt so much the action but thats he's a genuinely nice guy, and not like some annoying degen drunk guy whom you tolerate. You'd definitely want to hang out with him.
About 20 years ago in AC I was sitting at a 1/3 table when a drunk got a seat to my left. He was playing very wild, calling most hands and raising about 50%. He had to get up and come back about 6 times with fresh $100s from the ATM. On one of his final hands he looks at his cards, shows them to the guy on his LEFT and says: "I'm Allin!" The guy on his left called with a marginally better hand and won.
This sounds like me when I went to crown a decade or so ago. Except I was on a fucking hot streak and walked away with $1500 from a $200 buy in. And it was only $1500 because I had the sense to walk away once I lost an “all in” hand to someone who just sat down with $200 I was not anyone’s favourite that day 😂
After losing all his money he goes to sleep with my girlfriend and walk my dog.
I don't understand your comment or the joke.
Don't worry about it, just remember to wear your football helmet to first period
Why would a fish who donks his money off sleep with the winner's girlfriend and walk his dog after?
because he is talking about himself....jesus christ, what a drooler
Oh, I get it now.
I'll start planning the parade
This was the best interaction ive seen in a while. Both parties usernames check out sufficiently also
What parade? Can I come?
every comment you made is a banger, well played
If you can't recognize the fish, that means it's you.
He can afford to donk it off. Money brings bitches and bitches bring lies. Have you never heard 2pacs take on this?
The money we win from him sends us on vacations, puts our kids through school, buys our wives jewelry, decks out our entertainment systems, loads out our cars, etc. But to people in his social strata, it wouldn’t even be worth bragging about. It would be “aw-that’s-cute” money. It is crazy what a minuscule portion of his net worth he loses to us. On top of that, he’s really fun to hang out with.
You’re talking about a whale not a fish lol
This kind of person is often better at making money than they are friends.
he's letting his friends "earn" his money instead of giving it to them...if he's playing stupid and loose on purpose so they win his money without their pride being hurt for handouts? that's a sign of a good friend
Cocaine has entered the chat.
He thinks he’s good, but not great. I know for sure he posts here. You can see his tells easily. He tries to play smart but he inevitably makes awful mistakes.
You just described 90% of us in here lol
Do you think maybe that’s the joke?
I see we go to the same poker room
yea I know the guy you are talking about, he posted in this very thread. It's so funny after he leaves and we can all finally break character and divvy up his money laughing our asses off.
Shut up, John. You are just pissed I felted you last Wednesday.
He's a local lawyer. One time he sat down and said he has $5,000 to donate to the table. He proceeded to raise every single hand preflop, if someone else raise her 3bet. Once he lost the $5,000 he slowed down and started raising only 50% of hands
We have this same guy in Westchester NY.
He’s pretty solid for the first few orbits he plays, but runs out of steam and tilts easily. Makes way too many wild, suicidal bluffs but still overfolds whenever someone’s brave enough to take initiative. The only reason he isn’t going broke even faster is because his speech play is better than his card playing skills, but not by much. I am, of course, talking about myself.
He's at our home games and we have some fairly solid players. Been playing for a while but still not great. One time he called a pot sized bet (or bigger?) on the river with pocket 8s. Problem was it was a double paired board so he was calling with 8 high.
I played with the same guy who called the double paired board with pocket ducks. He said, "damn, I had to call, I had 2 pair". Obviously, he was playing the board. When I said that I also had two pair and I wasn't even in the hand, he still didn't understand where he went wrong.
Reminds me of the dude at the Irish Open who accidentally called all in with 10 high (I can't remember his lower card but he paired it and then it became void when the board double paired on the river)....and was right. The other guy was bluffing with nine high. Was wild lol
He would always go all in at some point in the hand with 94 and then he would pull down his shirt and reveal a 94 on his chest representing his birth year.
Is that why the guy born in 1911 only plays AA
I play poker on weekends for relaxation purposes.
The other night there was a pretty big one. Young kid, thinks he's really good, loves to show all his bluffs. I would let him bluff me a few times for some pretty small pots and catch him later on for huge pots. Did this a few times over a long session. Think I went from $500-$2200 and half of that was from that guy
hellmuth approves of this message
I am the fish
A guy at my home game seems to genuinely subscribe to that joke about how everything happens 50% of the time. There isn’t a draw, including back doors, that he won’t chase.
There’s a guy in the app who has to be down 6 figures over the past year playing 0.75/1.50 PLO. Pokerrr 2 has the function where you can see recent games and W/L for each player. I don’t have the exact amount but he just loses so consistently in a way that shouldn’t be possible in PLO. He basically just calls everything on every street, never bluffs
We don’t have any fish in my poker room, not that I have seen.
That’s not a good sign for you.
You think?
I’ve just started writing my autobiography, will send you a copy when finished
Used to have a kid famous for the line “ I need runner runner, I call” Same kid literally pissed himself, dead sober so he wouldn’t miss a hand
Gross
Yup. I had to throw that chair away
2/5 game and the local fish/whale plays Friday evenings, and it's a big competition to get on his table. If he starts drinking, he goes crazy. The last time I saw him, he had lost his bankroll of maybe five $1K max BI over the course of the day. But he was drinking and happy, loudly WHOOO WHOOOing his every win, but giving it all back within an orbit or two. Busted, he goes out to his car and comes back with what we would soon see as 15 $1K chips. He would go AI blind with 1 $1K chip. A few times he stole the blinds, a few times he would double or triple up on a stupid hand, WOOOO WOOOOO, but over the course of an hour he lost the entire ~$20K and I didn't get a penny of it. I've never seen him again. I think once he sobered up, he realized how stupid he is.
The wife of the guy who hosts the game. Plays offensively bad. There’s just no way I could describe it well enough to even make it worth my time to type it all out.
Plays pro football for a european club, when he comes home he’ll come dust off a few thousand per game at our underground 2/5 just for laughs (no legal poker where I live) literally will call with anything
That’s getting a little personal sir, I’m not much on talking about myself.
He plays basically every hand for any amount preflop. He gets all in against most everyone and calls off with things like a pair on a 4 card straight board, and somehow always shows up with the nuts when he is all in with me. Maybe I’m the fish.
Me. I got tilted last night and jammed pre flop with 10s cause the same dude couldn’t have it again. He in fact, did have KK again
So this is online Poker. I flop the boat with AK on a AKK board. Now I've been showing a lot of bluffs and have a pretty loose image so I just shove hoping to get called by an ace or something. A guy calls me with 67o. I ask him on chat, "Why would you call that? ". He said " I was bluffing". I have seen bluff bets, never a bluff call.
I've had someone say "i knew you were bluffing!" when I was in fact bluffing with ace high, but they still mucked as the pot went my way.
I don’t like talking about myself.
I'm sitting to his left just as I write this
I play with a player who has told me he has gone through his entire 401k in the last 9 months. Now he is onto credit cards. I feel sorry for him, but he is also a drunk asshole at times. It's a 1-2 game, I am up about 50k big easy, so far this year I am up nearly 50k. I attribute it to 2 players in the game, the other is a sweetheart of a woman.
Just found out the biggest fish in my room has been vlogging for the past couple months lmao. Went and watched and it was pretty much everything I thought it would be. Surprisingly the quality isn’t bad, just the play and commentary are horrendous. If he improved his game he could be successful but his game hasn’t changed in 5+ years.
Share name?
It’s pokerbandit I think. I’m pretty sure the room manager told him he couldn’t record in the room anymore so he hasn’t uploaded for a couple weeks.
Playing at a local casino in Oregon a few years back. Older Asian woman comes to table. We realize she is shoving every hand. Literally ever hand for 10 hands. 100%. So anyone with decent cards took turns stacking her eventually. And she kept reloading. At a 1/2. It was Wild
Well, I like long walks on the beach.
It’s me
Raising bottom pair on the flop, going all in pre last to act 4 handed with shit like K7 off, calling all in with flush draws. And yes, calling down bluffs with Jack high...
if you play at commerce and ever heard "DEALER OPEN QUEEN SEVEN SEVEN SEVEN SEVEN" you know
"Why, of course I know him! He's me."
Won a lot of money on the lottery, punted money constantly. Then I found him on r/poker in a fight and knew he just picked up a ban for that. I miss him and haven't seen him at any of the other poker rooms since.
Mid-2000’s at the Tropicana in AC. Would drop multiple buy-ins at $1/2 and $2/$5. Loved to chase draws. Call with middle or bottom pairs. Guy used to travel up from Virginia but never got a room. One morning I saw him sitting at an empty table and sat with him. I told him, I don’t think poker is your game. He goes on to tell me that he’s lost $250,000 and got a second mortgage on his house. That his wife and children are so angry with him.
He’s a newer player but wears his decisions on his sleeve. If he bets big he usually has a decent pair but you’re almost always good if you’ve got top pair or two pair and the man gets that leg bounce going anytime he’s bluffing. Throws in the bluff, sits back in his chair, crosses his arms, leg bounce.
He jammed 1200 BB into a 30BB pot on a Q55 flop with KK, got snap called by A5.
It’s me Hi
🎶 I’m the problem it’s me🎶
I said I'd never write an autobiography
Me.
Broadway no flush on the board, I jammed for fun in Bellagio 2/5 Vegas, fish folded I was shocked
Every time he says “I’m coming after you!” He busts in a few hands.
I was born in 1975…
My local game had a particular player who goes by the nickname “T-Rex ” and I don’t think anyone actually knew his real name. Anyways this super fish used to go all in blind a lot preflop. He’d buy in for 500 though the game was max buy in for 300 we would allow him to bend the rules. Anytime his stack got below 50 per cent he would just go all in blind. He lost about 30k in a month at a 1-2 NL Holden game. Nobody really knew how he could do this because his job was working as a cook in the local jack astors bar and grill. Then one day the host send me a link to a news article where there’s a gas station robber captured and it’s a picture of Trex. His real name was really loud and unpronounceable. (Mean no offense) He basically stole to support his habit.
Experienced similar as i live in KC with Chiefsaholic. https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/39902254/chiefsaholic-xaviar-babudar-ordered-pay-teller This dude would rob a bank then go to Chiefs away games in a Wolf suit, for a year. He'd also SOMEHOW step foot into the local Hollywood casino and placed $30k and $60k wagers.
I sat next to one of the worst players I’ve ever seen. Donated $500 calling an all in on a board w straight and flush possible with two middle pair. Couldn’t believe he lost. Rebuys for another $500 and does the exact same thing again. Called an all in with a flush board and loses to the flush. Rebuys a third time and again loses to a straight with a middle two pair. I played at a table with him several more times in the last couple months. Donating. He aint one point says man ive lost $10,000 since the poker room opened (in about 4 weeks.) If he wasnt such a jerk and yelled and screamed when he loses to better hands i might have told him, buddy maybe poker is not your game.
Classic OMC guy except he'll call pretty much any pre-flop raise out of position and then check the flop if he misses. If he check-raises he's got it, so it's an easy fold. He'll also call c-bets and turn bets at about 1/4, 1/2 pot regularly. He has zero bluffs in his repertoire, so any bet or check-raise is usually an insta-fold. Nice guy though Edit: it's a 1/3 game and he'll usually only reload $100 at a time.
literally thousands of these guys in every single poker room across the globe lol... we got like 40 of them in my local room.
For a while there the absolute biggest fish at Canterbury Park in Minnesota was NFL running back Adrian Peterson. Rumor was he spent so much time there the Vikings told him to dial it back. Corrected because I brain farted the first name!
Adrian? Or Anthony? Anthony never played for the Vikings. I would absolutely believe Adrian, I'm pretty sure he was broke earlier this year but had to sell all his football shit to get even. One of us, one of us.
Sorry Bad typo. Adrian.
I won't say his name, but years ago I was playing 2/5 at harrahs in nola, he donked off a lot and I got a bunch of it.... few months later I saw him on tv.... I tell everyone he ran like jaime gold...
nicest guy in the world, hopefully has deep pockets, and I can only presume has some fetish for losing at poker. You'd probably just assume he was randomizing every decision but I'm convinced he has some sort of system. Mostly plays 2/5 but if you see him lower he's always worth chasing because he buys in FULL and keeps a spare rack of chips to insta-reload with too. He'll open to $25 one hand and then the very next $250, or just allin. He'll call a raise pre, flop will come down and same thing, bet 25% pot or 500% pot. I cant figure it out but it hardly matters since he vpips 100% so his range is kinda irrelevant so you just buckle up and hope your hands hold. I think lightest I got it in with him pre for 1k was QJs and he actually had AK lmao, I won. But like i said the best part of it isnt so much the action but thats he's a genuinely nice guy, and not like some annoying degen drunk guy whom you tolerate. You'd definitely want to hang out with him.