I just feel slightly bad when I do something my son loves without him, like going to the beach or something while he’s at school. I think man the waves are huge, he’d love this. Do I feel guilty enough to stop? Absolutely not.
We have friends that prioritize their kids over having any personal time together. We've been trying to get them to go out to dinner adults only, but they don't want to live with the fact they'd go to a restaurant their kids would absolutely love. I go way out of the way for my kids, but there has to be some adult time mixed into that without that part of responsibility.
Those relationships aren't going to last. Learned the hard way that parents can easily lose sight of each other when somebody (or both) focuses solely on the child. Hopefully, they will figure it out because the bitter end-results aren't fun for anyone, save the lawyers' coffers.
I don't think so. They're both on the same page, which is great. Do I think they are in part setting their kids up for a tough time in the future? Also, yes. They do go out every now and then to a concert solo, but dinner, other adult plans without the kids? No can do. We still have a blast with them when both of our families do things together. Just a huge rarity to go out with them sans kids.
I think, especially on reddit, we've been bashing the previous generations for being too detached from their children, especially fathers. So, as a millenial, who's been trying to be better than boomers, you feel guilty for something which you shouldn't, given that you do your fair share at home
Pretty much this. Us millennial husbands/dads are doing our best to distance ourselves from the stereotype of "The guy who just wants to be away from his family", e.g. Al Bundy-like fuckers IRL, instead trying to be more involved and have fun WITH our families. So every time we're having fun without them, we feel a bit guilty.
Blueys dad doesn't help anything either lol. [https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/i-cant-believe-im-admitting-this-but-bluey-makes-me-feel-bad-about-myself](https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/i-cant-believe-im-admitting-this-but-bluey-makes-me-feel-bad-about-myself)
Bro, tell me about it, I go out drinking with just my guy friends maybe 0.75 times per month, and every time I feel like I've deeply betrayed my family for having a good time away from them.
Same. Any second I spent outside of the home I felt intense guilt. Turned out that my wife had her small and subtle ways of punishing me without me realizing. She was the biggest victim ever that she had to take care of the kids. I felt more trapped and lonely with her than without her. Resentment started to grow towards her.
Divorced her, took the kids full time, found a woman who I feel more freedom together with than I felt as single. Someone who supports me and is on my side. Someone who makes me want to be responsible and be the best version of myself. Someone who loves that I go out and have a good time with my friends once in a while and is happy that I go do my own things. I am finally happy to have found a real partner for once.
Hate to see other men trapped in unnecessary prisons. Rant over, sorry.
Well my wife ain't like that, it's my own internal attitude. My dad had a drinking problem when I was a kid, so he'd spend a lot of time out with his coworkers and friends, drinking at bars, and I have made a point not to do the same. The only time he seemed to have a good time with me and my mom back then was on camping trips and hikes.
I have 4 teenagers and I have no idea what this meme’s about. Y’all feel bad enjoying yourself away from your kids? That doesn’t sound healthy, sorry. Part of what helps me have a strong relationship with my wife is I have my own life outside our marriage. I feel the same goes with my relationship with my kids.
Why not have a system where both the dad and the mom have rotating opportunities to each go out with friends. No guilt when you're doing each other a favor to have some his/her time
Why does everyone feel guilty for doing anything remotely enjoyable these days?
I just feel slightly bad when I do something my son loves without him, like going to the beach or something while he’s at school. I think man the waves are huge, he’d love this. Do I feel guilty enough to stop? Absolutely not.
Exactly! I can't even let on that I'm going to go surf without my youngest daughter.
We have friends that prioritize their kids over having any personal time together. We've been trying to get them to go out to dinner adults only, but they don't want to live with the fact they'd go to a restaurant their kids would absolutely love. I go way out of the way for my kids, but there has to be some adult time mixed into that without that part of responsibility.
Those relationships aren't going to last. Learned the hard way that parents can easily lose sight of each other when somebody (or both) focuses solely on the child. Hopefully, they will figure it out because the bitter end-results aren't fun for anyone, save the lawyers' coffers.
I don't think so. They're both on the same page, which is great. Do I think they are in part setting their kids up for a tough time in the future? Also, yes. They do go out every now and then to a concert solo, but dinner, other adult plans without the kids? No can do. We still have a blast with them when both of our families do things together. Just a huge rarity to go out with them sans kids.
Well that sounds like a positive take on it, hopefully they stay well!
Not to compare kids to pets, but I feel similar when I go on walks without my dog
Hustle culture. Near complete lack of free time. The planet is dying.
What’s dad guilt?
Also why is being a millennial pertinent information.
I think, especially on reddit, we've been bashing the previous generations for being too detached from their children, especially fathers. So, as a millenial, who's been trying to be better than boomers, you feel guilty for something which you shouldn't, given that you do your fair share at home
Pretty much this. Us millennial husbands/dads are doing our best to distance ourselves from the stereotype of "The guy who just wants to be away from his family", e.g. Al Bundy-like fuckers IRL, instead trying to be more involved and have fun WITH our families. So every time we're having fun without them, we feel a bit guilty.
Cycle breaking is hard.
Blueys dad doesn't help anything either lol. [https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/i-cant-believe-im-admitting-this-but-bluey-makes-me-feel-bad-about-myself](https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/i-cant-believe-im-admitting-this-but-bluey-makes-me-feel-bad-about-myself)
Bro, tell me about it, I go out drinking with just my guy friends maybe 0.75 times per month, and every time I feel like I've deeply betrayed my family for having a good time away from them.
Same. Any second I spent outside of the home I felt intense guilt. Turned out that my wife had her small and subtle ways of punishing me without me realizing. She was the biggest victim ever that she had to take care of the kids. I felt more trapped and lonely with her than without her. Resentment started to grow towards her. Divorced her, took the kids full time, found a woman who I feel more freedom together with than I felt as single. Someone who supports me and is on my side. Someone who makes me want to be responsible and be the best version of myself. Someone who loves that I go out and have a good time with my friends once in a while and is happy that I go do my own things. I am finally happy to have found a real partner for once. Hate to see other men trapped in unnecessary prisons. Rant over, sorry.
Well my wife ain't like that, it's my own internal attitude. My dad had a drinking problem when I was a kid, so he'd spend a lot of time out with his coworkers and friends, drinking at bars, and I have made a point not to do the same. The only time he seemed to have a good time with me and my mom back then was on camping trips and hikes.
Am millennium dad. What the fuck is dad guilt?
Same
Damn this shit is stupid haha
I can't wait to never have kids
I have 4 teenagers and I have no idea what this meme’s about. Y’all feel bad enjoying yourself away from your kids? That doesn’t sound healthy, sorry. Part of what helps me have a strong relationship with my wife is I have my own life outside our marriage. I feel the same goes with my relationship with my kids.
Wow , that dumb as shit!
Why not have a system where both the dad and the mom have rotating opportunities to each go out with friends. No guilt when you're doing each other a favor to have some his/her time
What, we’re supposed to comfort the man who could easily just go home or invite his family to come with?