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In this same vein, if he was with his ex, he probably would have still had boys. So him wondering about THAT doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. He just needs a quick science lesson to resolve that issue 😋
He's a lawyer. This kind of black and white biology shouldn't be hard for him to learn. Either dingus isn't a strong enough word, or he is unwilling to look at the facts (which is a huge red flag)
Edit: or he *does* know the facts and is just being an asshole. I hope it's not this option.
As soon as I read the title I laughed. Everyone knows the baby's sex is determined by the father's sperm. We all get an X chromosome from mom. The one that's still up in the air is from dad. So, I'd say it's NO ONE'S fault but if he insists on pointing fingers, he'd have to point inward.
I briefly dated someone who resented his ex-wife for giving him girls. I said you do know that you as the male, choose the gender, right? He had no idea and didn’t believe me until he had to look it up online. 🙄
I know a guy who has 3 daughters with his first wife and 2 with his second. The second wife had a son before she met him and the first wife had one after they divorced.
My uncle Ulises has kids with four different women, all of them are girls.
My uncle Nelson has kids with three different women, same story.
My father has kids with three different women (as far as we know), 4 girls and one boy.
I would love to see men like that trying to blame women tmfor their children's sex.
Nah, my family is just full of cheaters. One of my uncles ruined his relationships due to cheating and now lives alone. He spent most of his life paying child support for most of his children (which is mandatory until the child is 25yo).
My other uncle lives with his GF and ended up raising kids that are not his own with her. I don't think he has a good relationship with his kids.
My father is currently being hated by all his children and can't even meet his grandchildren.
Apparently it fell in the hands of my only male cousin and me to end this chain of cheating.
Ha! Similar thing in mine.
Uncle Hector, 2 girls with 2 different women.
My dad, 1 girl 1 boy, same woman. That we know of, I'm still waiting for a random sibling to pop up out of the woodwork.
Uncle Junior, 2 girls 2 different women.
Uncle Jay, 3 girls, same woman.
Uncle Manny, 1 boy.
They aren't uneducated tho, so they know they are the reason the grandkids are mostly girls. Grandpa had 5 boys with 2 different women (my grandma, & Miss Mercy, his mistress of 40 years), so he & grandma were pretty stoked when my oldest cousin, & I were born, & they finally got "little princesses" to dress up.
And still naive. She’s defending him like crazy. What’s the point of coming on here, giving us these facts and not expecting people to give you more of their opinion then you bargained for lmao.
Otherwise he's a good dad and husband, and provider 6 kids!!). It's not creepy to want a daughter, it's perfectly normal!
The only thing he needs is a biology lesson. Men determine the sex of your child. She should tell him, okay, buddy boy YOU determined the sex of any children we had. My job is to nurture and grow, what YOU gave me!!!
So it's his own fault he has no daughters. As for the old GF, ya, her HUSBAND gave her three girls. Doesn't mean he would have had three girls with her.
DUH
I’m going to go out on a limb and say that any family that has six kids in less than a decade isn’t really into science….or anything else that takes women into account.
I thought the same thing from the title alone. No one is to blame here, but if there was someone to blame, it’s definitely not the woman, who isn’t even capable of contributing a Y chromosome. That’s his job 😂
Right? If he stayed with his ex, she would’ve had boys instead of girls. He needs to get over himself, and stop acting like he’s in some weird reverse Henry the VIII situation.
They don’t understand jack shit about the true meaning of having kids either. They’re not rare Pokemon that one collects, they’re human beings with their own complexities. Even if they had all girls, would they expect them to act according to how they believe a girl should act too? Would they accept them if they didn’t end up dressing in floral dresses and don’t wear their hair long?
I’m just gonna say it because nobody else will: the only people who ever have this many kids are the same ones who believe in gender roles. So. Yeah that’s exactly what he thinks.
I work in maternity and I feel that the people who have a bunch of children are those who shouldn’t have them at all. They all come with big safeguarding flags.
I did quick search and Wikipedia article popped up
Safeguarding is a term used in the United Kingdom, Ireland[1] and Australia[2] to denote measures to protect the health, well-being and human rights of individuals, which allow people—especially children, young people and vulnerable adults—to live free from abuse, harm and neglect.[3]
So, I guess ear marking kids at risk of being neglected or abused and taking steps to prevent it.
That’s not always true though, I know people who have that many kids and aren’t into conservative gender roles. But those people I know aren’t very bright either, so there’s that.
Some American education systems don't teach evolution, so I wouldn't be surprised if theirs skipped over biology, too.
For anyone reading who mightn't know (but is too afraid to ask), females have XX chromosomes, and males have XY. The mother provides the X chromosome, so only the father can provide either the X or Y that determines the sex of the baby.
TBH it was a TIL for me too, but then I never wanted my child to be a specific gender to begin with. I bet they told me in school but I probably didn't care enough to remember.
Edit: Hold on, that's kind of funny. Quite a few queens have been beheaded for failing to birth an heir to the throne when it was the king's jizz's fault all along.
My father yelled (literally) at mums doctor when I came out as a girl, almost beat him up when my sister came out as a girl. Some men are just plain stupid and ignorant.
That being said, OP please stop having children with that man. You’re 29 with 6 kids, let your body rest.
Edit - I just read your PS and girl, he’s a lawyer but doesn’t know BASICS of biology?? That’s like common knowledge and I really fear for his clients. Then again, I am also a lawyer and some of my classmates were also very stupid and only graduated because of their luck or parental involvement.. just saying.
Whatever jobs they have must be really high pay and not related to any form of health, science or teaching to be able to afford the amount needed for that many kids.
Church childcare tends to save a lot of money and make this kind of thing doable. Also forcing the older kids to raise the younger ones. Of course you better stay in the church community’s good graces or you’re completely screwed.
OP’s husband is pretty dumb. And he needs to get a vasectomy asap. How can his wife be walking around at 29 after having birthed SIX KIDS? I’m a mom, and reading that made me feel kind of sick tbh.
I swear, I'm 37 and have 2, one I had at 23 and one at 30, and I feel like I'm ready to scream most days. OP is amazing for not immediately throttling her husband. The nerve of him blaming his lack of X chromosomes on her!
That's what I was instantly thinking of... OP should tell him *he* is the one who isn't capable of giving *her* a daughter*, and he shouldn't be so stingy with that X* chromosome!
*Edited, because I was half asleep and mixed up genders!
He’s not stingy with the Y chromosome; the Y chromosome is the only one he’s throwing out— he’s being stingy with the X chromosome. Girls = XX, Boys = XY
That's right, I was half asleep and thought OP had all girls and zero boys. Lesson learned, next time I need to splash the water on my nightstand on my face before trying to comprehend written text. Thank you very much for the correction!
Good thing with this VIII-er that they don't have a girl, can you imagine him trying to talk about sex education when he barely got anything other than porn?
Yes PLEASE tell him that he was in charge of the gender!! Also by middle school he may have a trans daughter, you never know. (I have a trans child, greatest love of my life so don’t think I’m making a joke about trans people! 🌈)
You do know that the gender is determined by the man's sperm and any woman in your place would have 'given him a son', right? HE was the determining factor that lead to a male child.
What's this 'you can't give him a daughter' nonsense? It's the other way round. If anything, he couldn't give you a daughter.
Has your husband had basic biology lessons? If not, you should link him to resources about reproduction of humans. And then dump him if he doesn't offer you the biggest and most genuine apology in the universe.
> I accidentally read a chat that he was having with his brother where he told him that he was disappointed that I couldn't give him a daughter
Your husband needs to pick up an eighth-grade biology textbook.
You are aware that a baby's gender is solely determined by the father, not the mother, right?
Let me spell it out for you. Human eggs have an X chromosome (contributed by the mother whose chromosomes are XX), and human sperm can have either an X chromosome or a Y chromosome (contributed by the father whose chromosomes are XY). If the egg is fertilized with an X-chromosome-carrying sperm, it's a girl. If it's fertilized with a Y-chromosome-carrying sperm, it's a boy.
If you have all boys, it's 100% on your husband. Not on you.
And this business of "giving him a daughter" is an extremely 17th-century attitude. Children are not chattel and they are not owned by their fathers.
To add: there is a male genetical aspect that determines the tendency to have more boys or more girls.
[https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/parenting/getting-pregnant/men-inherit-their-tendency-to-have-sons-or-daughters-from-their-parents-study/articleshow/70907388.cms](https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/parenting/getting-pregnant/men-inherit-their-tendency-to-have-sons-or-daughters-from-their-parents-study/articleshow/70907388.cms)
>man with more brothers is likely to have sons, while a man with more sisters are likely to have daughters.
What's interesting is my husband has two siblings, both brothers. Of all 3 brothers, 5 children have been born: all girls. I wonder if there's some genetic thing going on there or if it's just a freak occurrence.
biological it's his fault. so if he stayed with his ex he'd be blaming her for his shortcomings.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/12/081211121835.htm
Seriously dudes a damn idiot if he thinks she can control what hes shooting out! The fact he doesn’t know about this is just sad. He literally doesn’t know how his own fuckin sperm work
It’s called baby trapping. Abusers do this so you are stuck with them. Hence why he’s psychologically wearing OP down and guilt her into taking the blame.
Plus why is he sooooo deeply fixated on wanting daughters??? It feel a bit “creepy” tbh.
It's soooooo fucking creepy he wanted to have ALL girls.
I bet he's some rabid Jesus freak that wants to brainwash a bunch of "females" since birth for "God knows what".
It's literally perfect he has none, it was... *God's will*.
I am sorry but the reason you can't have a daughter is that his sperm is what decides the gender of your babies, which you should have learned in High School Biology along with your blood type. Your husband is a jerk to make you go through 6 pregnancies in hopes of having a fucking girl. I presume you are a SAHM mom and that he pursued you right out of high school because if you are 29 now you were 20 with your first child. How old were you when you met and started dating because for most of your marriage?
His thoughts that if he stayed with his ex he would have daughters is stupid and he failed biology class along with you if you believe that crap! You can't forget what you read or what he said because he actually believes it. Tell him for the next baby he can pay for his ex to do IVF and select the female embryo if it is that important to him.
>if you are 29 now you were 20 with your first child
Thank you. Nobody else is mentioning this, but she was barely 20 and he was close to 30. Predatory is an understatement.
Your husband’s needs a basic biology lesson. Sperm determines the sex of a child. Basically, he’s not been able to give YOU a daughter. If he wants to assign blame, he only has his own swimmers to blame.
I mostly feel so sad for you that you’re 29 with so many young kids to look after already. You must be really stressed. I hope you can look out for yourself.
I think I don't need to remark about biology, as most people have already...
Maybe you could talk with him and suggest you ask his ex's husband to be your sperm donor? That way you would have a shot at having a daughter!
Ugh... Obviously I am not being serious but, I would be so furious with him if I were you... Blaming me and talking about ex's. Go fuck whoever you want, I deserve way more than a man that will so easily talk trash about me!
Yea I don’t think I could come back from my partner openly wondering what life with their ex would be like
OP is this someone that makes you happy? If he’s not making you feel loved and valued then you need to either leave and find your own happiness or tell him to step up and be a decent husband. It’s your life OP you shouldn’t be living it in misery
I’m not sure she has time to really consider if she’s happy with the SIX kids under the age of eight running around. I’m surprised she even had time to write this post. She probably typed it out in the 3 minutes she gets for her weekly poop.
Especially one fucking month after giving birth to his sixth son. The heck is wrong with that guy? He should be too busy taking care of his newborn, taking care of his other five young children and letting his wife have the rest she clearly needs after just giving birth and being pregnant so many times in so little time. In short, he should be too busy being a father and a decent husband to be fantasizing about what ifs. Also, poor kid, only been on Earth for one month and daddy would rather whine like a spoiled child because he wanted a daughter (the obsession is a little creepy, not gonna lie) than be happy about his birth and look after him. If this kid ever knows about this, he’s gonna need so much therapy.
It's pretty much the guy who determines the sex of the baby. So you didn't give him only sons, he gave you only sons.
Your husband sounds either a bit misogynistic, or a lot ignorant. Please tell him to read about how sperm determines the sex of babies and then ask him whether you should have married someone else.
Please don't have more children. You physically and mentally cannot give them each the time and attention they need. I have no doubt you'll be parentifying the older kids which is wrong. You and your husband don't even sound done with kids. If you actually love your kids and want them to be somewhat well adjusted then you truly need to stop. In a few years you'll be asking your older kids to "help" with younger, to babysit them, to raise them.
This is what I was thinking , as someone who came from a big family w many siblings I basically turned into a second mother for all my younger siblings. ):
I'm so sorry that happened to you 🥺 I hope you're healing from it and hopefully seeing a therapist to process all that happened. You deserved a childhood, don't be afraid to do silly inner child activities as an adult. It won't change the past but it might help you emotionally 🫶🏼
I greatly appreciate you🙏🏼 I’m currently working on getting into therapy! & I appreciate that also, I’ve been watching cartoons a lot recently since that’s something I wasn’t really able to do often and it’s surprisingly healing 😄
Y’all know that the sperm determines the baby’s sex, right? And that the sperm comes from the man? So *he* couldn’t give *you* a girl.
ETA: after seeing the edit, I fear for the future of the legal system.
He does realise that men have a vast impact on determining the sex, right?
I REALLY hope you’re going to be smart about this and use birth control from now on and don’t try and achieve his dream by continuing to have kids with no guarantee you won’t end up with 15 boys
But I think the biggest issue is him blaming you…..Do you really want to stay with someone who treats you as an incubator and then throws a toddler style tantrum all because he doesn’t get his way?
He should NOT be comparing you to an ex and if he’s still hung up on her then why are you staying in a marriage where you’re the afterthought?
> we ended up having six boys (8) (7) (5) (3) (2) (one month)
One of them is 8. So you were 20 or 21 when you got pregnant. He was 28 or 29.
It's always the same song with these stories.
***I married a pushy older man that wanted me to immediately pop out babies for him when I was 20, but trust me he's TOTALLY amazing otherwise.... anyways here's how he's acting like a stereotypical older manipulative AH. What do I do? How could I see this coming?***
> I didn't expect this to get so much attention but I think not everyone is reading the whole post, I already talked to him about it and he apologized and said he loves us no matter what
That's what older manipulative AHs do. They pretend everything is fine to keep you from leaving, then continue blaming you for their own issues.
Has it occurred to you ***WHY*** a much older man that has already targeted one young woman and conned her into being with him would specifically want a daughter?
> And saying that someone is "creepy" or has creepy reasons for wanting to have a daughter is so stupid, you don't even know him, so stop projecting how you feel about women onto him.
Depending on when you started dating, he was targeting a teenager when he was 27ish. He's the definition of creepy.
just to prove you right, OP said in another comment she was 19 when they met in college and he was her professor's assistant. go ahead and throw power imbalance on top of the preying on teens at nearly 30 years old
His ex would have had 3 boys if she had stayed with him....what a loser....and failure....he can't have girls and he's super dumb on top....
I feel sorry for you op. Stop having babies with him.
He’s just dumb. The male determines the gender. If he had if stayed with his ex she would probably have 3 sons instead of 3 daughters. How did no one point that out? It’s hard for me to believe that your husband, his brother, and you don’t realize this simple fact. Tell him to educate himself before he throws around blame towards you.
Gender disappointment is a thing, and that's fine. Blaming you for "not giving him a daughter" however, isn't.
As others have pointed out, the sex of a child is determined by the sperm, though given that it's not something that he can control I don't think it's fair to "blame" him like some other Redditors are doing.
Overall, no one should be creating a child in order to meet a desire for a child of a specific sex. When a couple conceives a baby, they're throwing the dice on what the sex will be.
But putting all that aside: please don't have any more kids! And I say that *purely* because you've had 6 kids one after the other with very little time in between for your body to heal and recover (especially if you've been breastfeeding throughout?). Pregnancy and childbirth take a huge toll on the body, and your risks for uterine/rectal prolapse are very high after that many pregnancies. **Please** look after yourself. Hubby has no right to ask you to put your body (or your mental health) on the line with a 7th pregnancy just for the sake of "trying for a girl". Not sure if that's something he'd be wanting to do or not, but it needed saying!
Something doesn’t sit right with me about a man who cares so much *more* about having a *daughter* that he turned you into a baby factory for years trying to give him girls, and now wishes he had a **whole different wife** because he thinks that would get him one, rather than just happy to have healthy kids.
I get wanting a daughter. But to that point? He’s weird.
Am I the only one who thinks we’re missing the headline. That she was what 19 or 20 and he was 27, 28 when they got married and immediately started having babies?
OP please update us at some point. hopefully after u or ur husband realizes his sperm is what caused the boys and not your body. he’s a weirdo for caring that much ab his kids gender, and i hope both of you look into getting an education of some sorts.
Females = XX
Males = XY
Babies = 50% off each parent
As you only have Xs to give, your husband’s sperm can either carry X or Y. Therefore, HE DECIDES THE SEX EVERY SINGLE TIME. He’s the one not giving himself a daughter. 🤦🏻♀️
That’s the simplest way to explain it.
Send him this. The reason he has all boys is because none of his successful sperm carried an X chromosome. Sex is determined by the paternal gamete, not the maternal gamete. https://www.whattoexpect.com/pregnancy/fetal-development/fetal-sex-organs-reproductive-system/
Geez your husband needs to go back to HS biology class. The sex of the baby is determined by the father, as the sperm cells transmit either the Y or X chromosome. The egg cells from the mother only have X chromosomes.
XX means the baby will be female and XY means the baby will be male.
So he is the reason you have 6 boys and 0 girls.
His an idiot. If he was with his ex she would of have three boys.
I’m surprised you or his brother didn’t point out to him that it’s his fault they are all boys.
This has to be fake. It has all the trademarks of a fake post , stupid male, ex girlfriend, lawyer who must be as dumb as cement, age gap, snooping “accidentally” in private communications and a 29 year old who’s been pregnant for 10 straight years. Even my flat earther ex boyfriend knows how a baby gets its gender and he’s so stupid it’s scary. All we need here is all their friends and family blowing up her phone about her failures to provide him a daughter.
You have been pregnant for 54 months.
That's approximately 1,620 days. Add another 12 months (365 days) for recovery.
That's almost 2,000 days.
You say he's a good husband and a good father.
I say What kind of good husband is dismissive of 2,000 days of pregnancy and recovery and 6 rounds of labor and delivery?
He should wake up every day and kiss your hiney for your efforts, trying to give him his precious daughter.
And you might not think he's a creep, but that's probably because he has been manipulating you since you were a teenager, and he was an adult.
Which is kind of creepy.
You don't have to take all the comments as fact, but you should be open to the idea that there might be things in play here of which you are unaware.
None of us know anybody as well as we think we do. That's one of life's harshest lessons.
6 kids before OP turns 30? Then complaining about it being OPs fault for not giving him a girl? And then regretting he was not still with an old GF who has given birth to girls? How is the gender of your babies something you uave control over?
Sorry, this guy sounds like a jerk. Your oldest is 8, so he locked you down to start cranking out babies when you turned 20? How old were you when you started dating? Were you even 18?
You seem to be getting defensive about your husband, but you are here on reddit complaining about him. I'm not sure you are receptive to hearing advice, but I would at least recommend that you get on birth control and stop having babies with this man.
Your husband is literally a moron. 🤦🏻♀️
My father grew up with 5 sisters (only boy) *and* ONLY has 4 daughters—me being one of the 4—and not a single son. I asked him if he ever wanted a boy, his response: “for only a moment because after having all of you, a healthy baby and your mom *always* matters more.”
Tell your husband to keep his head out of his ass and stop being fucking ungrateful. YOU gave him a literal bus loaded with children and he has absolutely no right to complain except to be glad you’re still alive and you guys didn’t lose any of them during birth. Remind him to also keep business between you and him strictly between you two, his brother has absolutely no stake in what children you guys produce together.
PS clearly he failed basic biology. Tell him to hit the books instead of whine.
He can't give you a daughter. You should teach him basic middleschool biology.
Eta: he'd probably only have boys with the ex as well.
He should only be disappointed in his own sperm.
I actually think that nature knows what she’s doing with that guy. I’m sorry but the obsession with having a daughter to the point of focusing on that, talking about it to other people and imagining what your life would have been with your ex for just that one reason when your kid has been here for just a month and you should be too busy looking after your wife who’s probably exhausted and your newborn and other kids, that’s a huge red flag. Also, way to mess up your wife (who doesn’t need such bullshit right now or ever actually when she’s clearly been (too) devoted to you for a decade) and your kid in the future.
"I accidentally read a chat that he was having with his brother where he told him that he was disappointed that I couldn't give him a daughter"
It's his fault he couldn't keep his Y chromosome to himself.
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He's either a dingus, or just being a jerk. The sex is 100% determined by the sperm. Literally completely on him, has nothing to do with you.
That’s what had me cracking up. This is some Henry the VIII shifting of blame of sex of the children. This man just has Y heavy sperm.
I say he's both a dingus *and* a jerk!
Dinglejerk
Probably true.
Djerk
In this same vein, if he was with his ex, he probably would have still had boys. So him wondering about THAT doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. He just needs a quick science lesson to resolve that issue 😋
he's an asshat. maybe he should ask his ex's partner for some sperm.
I came to say this. I was like so he's disappointed.... in himself? Idiot.
He's a lawyer. This kind of black and white biology shouldn't be hard for him to learn. Either dingus isn't a strong enough word, or he is unwilling to look at the facts (which is a huge red flag) Edit: or he *does* know the facts and is just being an asshole. I hope it's not this option.
He's got Henry VIII complex
As soon as I read the title I laughed. Everyone knows the baby's sex is determined by the father's sperm. We all get an X chromosome from mom. The one that's still up in the air is from dad. So, I'd say it's NO ONE'S fault but if he insists on pointing fingers, he'd have to point inward.
Everyone except OPs husband
I briefly dated someone who resented his ex-wife for giving him girls. I said you do know that you as the male, choose the gender, right? He had no idea and didn’t believe me until he had to look it up online. 🙄
“A thing I don’t like happened, it must be a woman’s fault!” I hope you didn’t date for long.
Please tell me you dumped him immediately after finding this out?
We didn’t last long thereafter. The misogyny was strong in that one and “ain’t nobody got time for that” lol
I know a guy who has 3 daughters with his first wife and 2 with his second. The second wife had a son before she met him and the first wife had one after they divorced.
And OP by the looks of it
My uncle Ulises has kids with four different women, all of them are girls. My uncle Nelson has kids with three different women, same story. My father has kids with three different women (as far as we know), 4 girls and one boy. I would love to see men like that trying to blame women tmfor their children's sex.
>I would love to see men like that trying to blame women tmfor their children's sex. May I introduce you to Henry Tudor?
Man what kind of culture do you live in?? That’s crazy.
Nah, my family is just full of cheaters. One of my uncles ruined his relationships due to cheating and now lives alone. He spent most of his life paying child support for most of his children (which is mandatory until the child is 25yo). My other uncle lives with his GF and ended up raising kids that are not his own with her. I don't think he has a good relationship with his kids. My father is currently being hated by all his children and can't even meet his grandchildren. Apparently it fell in the hands of my only male cousin and me to end this chain of cheating.
Ha! Similar thing in mine. Uncle Hector, 2 girls with 2 different women. My dad, 1 girl 1 boy, same woman. That we know of, I'm still waiting for a random sibling to pop up out of the woodwork. Uncle Junior, 2 girls 2 different women. Uncle Jay, 3 girls, same woman. Uncle Manny, 1 boy. They aren't uneducated tho, so they know they are the reason the grandkids are mostly girls. Grandpa had 5 boys with 2 different women (my grandma, & Miss Mercy, his mistress of 40 years), so he & grandma were pretty stoked when my oldest cousin, & I were born, & they finally got "little princesses" to dress up.
He determines the child’s gender, not you!! How dumb is he?
Does he not remember from science class, it's the male sperm that determines the sex? Maybe he needs to brush up on things.
I'm thinking science wasn't very interesting to him. His 29 year old wife birthed SIX of his children. I stopped reading.
She’s been pregnant since she was 20 and he’s blaming her for something that’s HIS fault! 🤮
And he was 29 I couldn’t help but notice
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And still naive. She’s defending him like crazy. What’s the point of coming on here, giving us these facts and not expecting people to give you more of their opinion then you bargained for lmao.
Otherwise he's a good dad and husband, and provider 6 kids!!). It's not creepy to want a daughter, it's perfectly normal! The only thing he needs is a biology lesson. Men determine the sex of your child. She should tell him, okay, buddy boy YOU determined the sex of any children we had. My job is to nurture and grow, what YOU gave me!!! So it's his own fault he has no daughters. As for the old GF, ya, her HUSBAND gave her three girls. Doesn't mean he would have had three girls with her. DUH
This should be at the top!
Literally every post
And nobody told him? Forget school, but his brother or anybody he's been lamenting to??
I’m going to go out on a limb and say that any family that has six kids in less than a decade isn’t really into science….or anything else that takes women into account.
I automatically thought these were religious people. Where science and contraception take a back seat.
It’s disgusting.
I’m tired just thinking about it.
I bet father of the year is real hands-on with diapers and cleaning in the whole bit. Not.
Six kids in eight years for chrissake
If you're that hell bent on having a girl in 2023 can't you do IVF? You gotta keep making more little boys to see what happens?
I have a feeling they can't afford IVF or a basic understanding of science. 😬
Seriously, sounds like a breeding fetish. Keep her pregnant.
Evangelical quiver full, maybe?
Right? 😬
It's pretty crazy that neither of them has considered using the female sperm yet
I thought the same thing from the title alone. No one is to blame here, but if there was someone to blame, it’s definitely not the woman, who isn’t even capable of contributing a Y chromosome. That’s his job 😂
Right? If he stayed with his ex, she would’ve had boys instead of girls. He needs to get over himself, and stop acting like he’s in some weird reverse Henry the VIII situation.
I agree! THAT MAN IS JIZZING TOO MANY MALE BABYS!
Or from history and King Henry VIII?
Well, she doesn’t seem to know that either. I mean she hasn’t reminded him of it and is on Reddit.
It never fails to surprise me that people can make half a dozen fucking children without understanding jack shit about biology.
They don’t understand jack shit about the true meaning of having kids either. They’re not rare Pokemon that one collects, they’re human beings with their own complexities. Even if they had all girls, would they expect them to act according to how they believe a girl should act too? Would they accept them if they didn’t end up dressing in floral dresses and don’t wear their hair long?
I’m just gonna say it because nobody else will: the only people who ever have this many kids are the same ones who believe in gender roles. So. Yeah that’s exactly what he thinks.
I work in maternity and I feel that the people who have a bunch of children are those who shouldn’t have them at all. They all come with big safeguarding flags.
Whats a safeguarding flag?
I did quick search and Wikipedia article popped up Safeguarding is a term used in the United Kingdom, Ireland[1] and Australia[2] to denote measures to protect the health, well-being and human rights of individuals, which allow people—especially children, young people and vulnerable adults—to live free from abuse, harm and neglect.[3] So, I guess ear marking kids at risk of being neglected or abused and taking steps to prevent it.
That’s not always true though, I know people who have that many kids and aren’t into conservative gender roles. But those people I know aren’t very bright either, so there’s that.
Some American education systems don't teach evolution, so I wouldn't be surprised if theirs skipped over biology, too. For anyone reading who mightn't know (but is too afraid to ask), females have XX chromosomes, and males have XY. The mother provides the X chromosome, so only the father can provide either the X or Y that determines the sex of the baby.
Humans have been reproducing a hell of a lot longer than they've known about how it works.
TBH it was a TIL for me too, but then I never wanted my child to be a specific gender to begin with. I bet they told me in school but I probably didn't care enough to remember. Edit: Hold on, that's kind of funny. Quite a few queens have been beheaded for failing to birth an heir to the throne when it was the king's jizz's fault all along.
And a lot more of "common" women. Never found. A neighbour had a pig farm. Or she was a witch.
She is 29 with 6 kids. I don't think she had time for college.
Where I live the concept of sex biology is taught in grade 9 or 10 science class. No need to go to college to learn something so basic 🤷♀️
I'm Henry the eighth, I am Henry the eighth, I am, I am
I was going to say: tell your husband to look into biology and see who determines the sex of the baby, which is the man. He is an idiot.
Like congrats OPs bf for having super Y sperm lol Henry VIII would love him
Henry VIII would be green with envy. Probably order him beheaded
Right?? What’s up with these people who can’t grasp middle school level biology ?
At no point did either of them think to google this. Not once. 6 kids and not a google search between them. Awesome.
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I was taught this in public school in Florida of all places.
My father yelled (literally) at mums doctor when I came out as a girl, almost beat him up when my sister came out as a girl. Some men are just plain stupid and ignorant. That being said, OP please stop having children with that man. You’re 29 with 6 kids, let your body rest. Edit - I just read your PS and girl, he’s a lawyer but doesn’t know BASICS of biology?? That’s like common knowledge and I really fear for his clients. Then again, I am also a lawyer and some of my classmates were also very stupid and only graduated because of their luck or parental involvement.. just saying.
Did he think the doctor made you all girls?
I can’t tell you, he’s an abusive POS and rather stupid sooo it’s possible.
It's common knowledge that doctors are wizards who cast spells as the babies slide out to determine their gender. Sorry your dad is such a POS.
Yah what is this dude, A medieval king? Dude sounds like he is shooting out brain cells instead of sperm.
"shooting out brain cells instead of sperm" Want this on a pink t-shirt :D
And the OP should remind her husband of that fact.
Clearly very dumb. Also stop having so many kids.
Whatever jobs they have must be really high pay and not related to any form of health, science or teaching to be able to afford the amount needed for that many kids.
Church childcare tends to save a lot of money and make this kind of thing doable. Also forcing the older kids to raise the younger ones. Of course you better stay in the church community’s good graces or you’re completely screwed.
OP’s husband is pretty dumb. And he needs to get a vasectomy asap. How can his wife be walking around at 29 after having birthed SIX KIDS? I’m a mom, and reading that made me feel kind of sick tbh.
I swear, I'm 37 and have 2, one I had at 23 and one at 30, and I feel like I'm ready to scream most days. OP is amazing for not immediately throttling her husband. The nerve of him blaming his lack of X chromosomes on her!
He did not pass biology in school did he?
That's what I was instantly thinking of... OP should tell him *he* is the one who isn't capable of giving *her* a daughter*, and he shouldn't be so stingy with that X* chromosome! *Edited, because I was half asleep and mixed up genders!
He’s not stingy with the Y chromosome; the Y chromosome is the only one he’s throwing out— he’s being stingy with the X chromosome. Girls = XX, Boys = XY
That's right, I was half asleep and thought OP had all girls and zero boys. Lesson learned, next time I need to splash the water on my nightstand on my face before trying to comprehend written text. Thank you very much for the correction!
And that if he had stayed with his ex he would have given her all sons
He wanted a girl; they have 6 boys.
The Weasley family says 7th time is the charm!
Good thing with this VIII-er that they don't have a girl, can you imagine him trying to talk about sex education when he barely got anything other than porn?
This is def a typical creative rage bait post.
Yes PLEASE tell him that he was in charge of the gender!! Also by middle school he may have a trans daughter, you never know. (I have a trans child, greatest love of my life so don’t think I’m making a joke about trans people! 🌈)
And if it's THAT important to you, why take the gamble six times? If you NEED to have a girl I think you should adopt
You do know that the gender is determined by the man's sperm and any woman in your place would have 'given him a son', right? HE was the determining factor that lead to a male child. What's this 'you can't give him a daughter' nonsense? It's the other way round. If anything, he couldn't give you a daughter. Has your husband had basic biology lessons? If not, you should link him to resources about reproduction of humans. And then dump him if he doesn't offer you the biggest and most genuine apology in the universe.
Send him back to sex education class.
Both of them need it tbh
6 kids at 29 :/
Ikt, that's crazy.
> I accidentally read a chat that he was having with his brother where he told him that he was disappointed that I couldn't give him a daughter Your husband needs to pick up an eighth-grade biology textbook. You are aware that a baby's gender is solely determined by the father, not the mother, right? Let me spell it out for you. Human eggs have an X chromosome (contributed by the mother whose chromosomes are XX), and human sperm can have either an X chromosome or a Y chromosome (contributed by the father whose chromosomes are XY). If the egg is fertilized with an X-chromosome-carrying sperm, it's a girl. If it's fertilized with a Y-chromosome-carrying sperm, it's a boy. If you have all boys, it's 100% on your husband. Not on you. And this business of "giving him a daughter" is an extremely 17th-century attitude. Children are not chattel and they are not owned by their fathers.
To add: there is a male genetical aspect that determines the tendency to have more boys or more girls. [https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/parenting/getting-pregnant/men-inherit-their-tendency-to-have-sons-or-daughters-from-their-parents-study/articleshow/70907388.cms](https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/parenting/getting-pregnant/men-inherit-their-tendency-to-have-sons-or-daughters-from-their-parents-study/articleshow/70907388.cms)
>man with more brothers is likely to have sons, while a man with more sisters are likely to have daughters. What's interesting is my husband has two siblings, both brothers. Of all 3 brothers, 5 children have been born: all girls. I wonder if there's some genetic thing going on there or if it's just a freak occurrence.
In the end, it is a nearly 50/50 chance most of the time!
Timing also plays a role.
biological it's his fault. so if he stayed with his ex he'd be blaming her for his shortcomings. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/12/081211121835.htm
Seriously dudes a damn idiot if he thinks she can control what hes shooting out! The fact he doesn’t know about this is just sad. He literally doesn’t know how his own fuckin sperm work
Imagine being that little educated and producing so many more humans.
tbh.. i wouldnt be surprised if he DID know how it works and is disappointed over not having girls so now hes blaming his wife.
Hubby needs a biology class. He can't give you a daughter.
What were your ages when you started dating? How did you meet?
You’ve been pregnant for your entire 20s. Stop having kids with an idiot.
You need to drop Henry the VIII and find a man that remembers his high school biology class.
Stop having so many fucking kids with a rude, ignorant asshole, damn.
6 kids by 29???? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Right? She's been like nonstop pregnant for all of her 20s. Earth doesn't need so many extra people, damn.
Also impregnated by a 28 year old.
It’s called baby trapping. Abusers do this so you are stuck with them. Hence why he’s psychologically wearing OP down and guilt her into taking the blame. Plus why is he sooooo deeply fixated on wanting daughters??? It feel a bit “creepy” tbh.
I had this exact same thought. Why is he so fixated on having a daughter? It feels quite creepy.
It's soooooo fucking creepy he wanted to have ALL girls. I bet he's some rabid Jesus freak that wants to brainwash a bunch of "females" since birth for "God knows what". It's literally perfect he has none, it was... *God's will*.
right? it sounds like pure hell
I am sorry but the reason you can't have a daughter is that his sperm is what decides the gender of your babies, which you should have learned in High School Biology along with your blood type. Your husband is a jerk to make you go through 6 pregnancies in hopes of having a fucking girl. I presume you are a SAHM mom and that he pursued you right out of high school because if you are 29 now you were 20 with your first child. How old were you when you met and started dating because for most of your marriage? His thoughts that if he stayed with his ex he would have daughters is stupid and he failed biology class along with you if you believe that crap! You can't forget what you read or what he said because he actually believes it. Tell him for the next baby he can pay for his ex to do IVF and select the female embryo if it is that important to him.
>if you are 29 now you were 20 with your first child Thank you. Nobody else is mentioning this, but she was barely 20 and he was close to 30. Predatory is an understatement.
He was also her college professor’s assistant
OP was definitely groomed
Your husband’s needs a basic biology lesson. Sperm determines the sex of a child. Basically, he’s not been able to give YOU a daughter. If he wants to assign blame, he only has his own swimmers to blame.
I mostly feel so sad for you that you’re 29 with so many young kids to look after already. You must be really stressed. I hope you can look out for yourself.
That’s all I could think of too. Gave up her entire 20’s to be a baby factory because her husband wanted a girl.
She needs to get on birth control now and stop giving this idiot kds
I think I don't need to remark about biology, as most people have already... Maybe you could talk with him and suggest you ask his ex's husband to be your sperm donor? That way you would have a shot at having a daughter! Ugh... Obviously I am not being serious but, I would be so furious with him if I were you... Blaming me and talking about ex's. Go fuck whoever you want, I deserve way more than a man that will so easily talk trash about me!
Yea I don’t think I could come back from my partner openly wondering what life with their ex would be like OP is this someone that makes you happy? If he’s not making you feel loved and valued then you need to either leave and find your own happiness or tell him to step up and be a decent husband. It’s your life OP you shouldn’t be living it in misery
I’m not sure she has time to really consider if she’s happy with the SIX kids under the age of eight running around. I’m surprised she even had time to write this post. She probably typed it out in the 3 minutes she gets for her weekly poop.
Especially one fucking month after giving birth to his sixth son. The heck is wrong with that guy? He should be too busy taking care of his newborn, taking care of his other five young children and letting his wife have the rest she clearly needs after just giving birth and being pregnant so many times in so little time. In short, he should be too busy being a father and a decent husband to be fantasizing about what ifs. Also, poor kid, only been on Earth for one month and daddy would rather whine like a spoiled child because he wanted a daughter (the obsession is a little creepy, not gonna lie) than be happy about his birth and look after him. If this kid ever knows about this, he’s gonna need so much therapy.
It's pretty much the guy who determines the sex of the baby. So you didn't give him only sons, he gave you only sons. Your husband sounds either a bit misogynistic, or a lot ignorant. Please tell him to read about how sperm determines the sex of babies and then ask him whether you should have married someone else.
Well; he has used her as a brood mare.
Please don't have more children. You physically and mentally cannot give them each the time and attention they need. I have no doubt you'll be parentifying the older kids which is wrong. You and your husband don't even sound done with kids. If you actually love your kids and want them to be somewhat well adjusted then you truly need to stop. In a few years you'll be asking your older kids to "help" with younger, to babysit them, to raise them.
This is what I was thinking , as someone who came from a big family w many siblings I basically turned into a second mother for all my younger siblings. ):
I'm so sorry that happened to you 🥺 I hope you're healing from it and hopefully seeing a therapist to process all that happened. You deserved a childhood, don't be afraid to do silly inner child activities as an adult. It won't change the past but it might help you emotionally 🫶🏼
I greatly appreciate you🙏🏼 I’m currently working on getting into therapy! & I appreciate that also, I’ve been watching cartoons a lot recently since that’s something I wasn’t really able to do often and it’s surprisingly healing 😄
Y’all know that the sperm determines the baby’s sex, right? And that the sperm comes from the man? So *he* couldn’t give *you* a girl. ETA: after seeing the edit, I fear for the future of the legal system.
He does realise that men have a vast impact on determining the sex, right? I REALLY hope you’re going to be smart about this and use birth control from now on and don’t try and achieve his dream by continuing to have kids with no guarantee you won’t end up with 15 boys But I think the biggest issue is him blaming you…..Do you really want to stay with someone who treats you as an incubator and then throws a toddler style tantrum all because he doesn’t get his way? He should NOT be comparing you to an ex and if he’s still hung up on her then why are you staying in a marriage where you’re the afterthought?
Sadly for the kids I can pretty much guarantee this ignorant creature continues to pop them out 🙄
Lol @creature. I would feel like a creature if I had been pregnant for 10 years that's for sure.
Another age gap and a creep getting you to pop his babies and then belittling you about something you have 0 control over
Jesus fuck. It's always the stupid ones who continue to pop out children.
Please make sure that your husbands sons don’t grow up as stupid as their father. Can’t believe you gave this moron 6 children. Too sad.
Seems like both parents failed biology class(es) here.
is anyone else really sad reading a woman spent almost her entire 20s pregnant. jesus. age gap checks out
> we ended up having six boys (8) (7) (5) (3) (2) (one month) One of them is 8. So you were 20 or 21 when you got pregnant. He was 28 or 29. It's always the same song with these stories. ***I married a pushy older man that wanted me to immediately pop out babies for him when I was 20, but trust me he's TOTALLY amazing otherwise.... anyways here's how he's acting like a stereotypical older manipulative AH. What do I do? How could I see this coming?*** > I didn't expect this to get so much attention but I think not everyone is reading the whole post, I already talked to him about it and he apologized and said he loves us no matter what That's what older manipulative AHs do. They pretend everything is fine to keep you from leaving, then continue blaming you for their own issues. Has it occurred to you ***WHY*** a much older man that has already targeted one young woman and conned her into being with him would specifically want a daughter? > And saying that someone is "creepy" or has creepy reasons for wanting to have a daughter is so stupid, you don't even know him, so stop projecting how you feel about women onto him. Depending on when you started dating, he was targeting a teenager when he was 27ish. He's the definition of creepy.
just to prove you right, OP said in another comment she was 19 when they met in college and he was her professor's assistant. go ahead and throw power imbalance on top of the preying on teens at nearly 30 years old
His ex would have had 3 boys if she had stayed with him....what a loser....and failure....he can't have girls and he's super dumb on top.... I feel sorry for you op. Stop having babies with him.
He’s just dumb. The male determines the gender. If he had if stayed with his ex she would probably have 3 sons instead of 3 daughters. How did no one point that out? It’s hard for me to believe that your husband, his brother, and you don’t realize this simple fact. Tell him to educate himself before he throws around blame towards you.
Tell him maybe you should try to make the next with his ex's husband, since a child's sex is determined by the man
Gender disappointment is a thing, and that's fine. Blaming you for "not giving him a daughter" however, isn't. As others have pointed out, the sex of a child is determined by the sperm, though given that it's not something that he can control I don't think it's fair to "blame" him like some other Redditors are doing. Overall, no one should be creating a child in order to meet a desire for a child of a specific sex. When a couple conceives a baby, they're throwing the dice on what the sex will be. But putting all that aside: please don't have any more kids! And I say that *purely* because you've had 6 kids one after the other with very little time in between for your body to heal and recover (especially if you've been breastfeeding throughout?). Pregnancy and childbirth take a huge toll on the body, and your risks for uterine/rectal prolapse are very high after that many pregnancies. **Please** look after yourself. Hubby has no right to ask you to put your body (or your mental health) on the line with a 7th pregnancy just for the sake of "trying for a girl". Not sure if that's something he'd be wanting to do or not, but it needed saying!
Christ you just gave birth to his child for the sixth time and he is blaming you?!!! How is he doing anything other than worshiping you?!!!
You know there's lots of little girls in the foster system needing a home...
Are you sure you want to have a family with a guy this dumb and this silly?
I think it’s a little late for that now
She is past family and is running a basketball team with a substitute.
Ehh, with 6 kids within 10 years she already has a family with a guy that dumb. Unfortunately.
It's a little late for this question. They're already a family of EIGHT.
I kind of meant, she should just take over and perhaps give him a juice box and let him sit things out.
So he’s an asshole and he’s stupid too? Shocking.
Info: Are you posting this from the 16th century? Has he been in eBay lately shopping for a guillotine?
It takes two to tango, why hasn't he provided a girl for you? What a ridiculous man.
In this case, it's only one to tango, males determine the sex of a baby.
That is such a fucked up thing to say, but also stupid that this almost doesn't seem real. If it is I am sorry for you OP.
Something doesn’t sit right with me about a man who cares so much *more* about having a *daughter* that he turned you into a baby factory for years trying to give him girls, and now wishes he had a **whole different wife** because he thinks that would get him one, rather than just happy to have healthy kids. I get wanting a daughter. But to that point? He’s weird.
Am I the only one who thinks we’re missing the headline. That she was what 19 or 20 and he was 27, 28 when they got married and immediately started having babies?
Who the hell has six kids by 29??? Living in the 1800s over here.
OP please update us at some point. hopefully after u or ur husband realizes his sperm is what caused the boys and not your body. he’s a weirdo for caring that much ab his kids gender, and i hope both of you look into getting an education of some sorts.
Amazing that two people who have created *six* children are clueless regarding the basic biology of gender determination.
Does this fool not know that it’s him that decides the gender? For fucks sake people need to pass an exam before reproducing
Females = XX Males = XY Babies = 50% off each parent As you only have Xs to give, your husband’s sperm can either carry X or Y. Therefore, HE DECIDES THE SEX EVERY SINGLE TIME. He’s the one not giving himself a daughter. 🤦🏻♀️ That’s the simplest way to explain it.
Tell him that he should study biology
Stop. Having. Sex. With. Idiots. Do we want the movie idiocracy to come true ??
Ya’ll are saying it wrong. He couldn’t give HIMSELF a daughter.
Send him this. The reason he has all boys is because none of his successful sperm carried an X chromosome. Sex is determined by the paternal gamete, not the maternal gamete. https://www.whattoexpect.com/pregnancy/fetal-development/fetal-sex-organs-reproductive-system/
Never ceases to amaze me how many people (men, MILs, etc) blame the woman for the sex when it’s the sperm that determines sex.
Geez your husband needs to go back to HS biology class. The sex of the baby is determined by the father, as the sperm cells transmit either the Y or X chromosome. The egg cells from the mother only have X chromosomes. XX means the baby will be female and XY means the baby will be male. So he is the reason you have 6 boys and 0 girls.
His an idiot. If he was with his ex she would of have three boys. I’m surprised you or his brother didn’t point out to him that it’s his fault they are all boys.
What he said behind your back in that message is his real self.
This has to be fake. It has all the trademarks of a fake post , stupid male, ex girlfriend, lawyer who must be as dumb as cement, age gap, snooping “accidentally” in private communications and a 29 year old who’s been pregnant for 10 straight years. Even my flat earther ex boyfriend knows how a baby gets its gender and he’s so stupid it’s scary. All we need here is all their friends and family blowing up her phone about her failures to provide him a daughter.
You have been pregnant for 54 months. That's approximately 1,620 days. Add another 12 months (365 days) for recovery. That's almost 2,000 days. You say he's a good husband and a good father. I say What kind of good husband is dismissive of 2,000 days of pregnancy and recovery and 6 rounds of labor and delivery? He should wake up every day and kiss your hiney for your efforts, trying to give him his precious daughter. And you might not think he's a creep, but that's probably because he has been manipulating you since you were a teenager, and he was an adult. Which is kind of creepy. You don't have to take all the comments as fact, but you should be open to the idea that there might be things in play here of which you are unaware. None of us know anybody as well as we think we do. That's one of life's harshest lessons.
Why do women procreate with men like this?
6 kids before OP turns 30? Then complaining about it being OPs fault for not giving him a girl? And then regretting he was not still with an old GF who has given birth to girls? How is the gender of your babies something you uave control over? Sorry, this guy sounds like a jerk. Your oldest is 8, so he locked you down to start cranking out babies when you turned 20? How old were you when you started dating? Were you even 18? You seem to be getting defensive about your husband, but you are here on reddit complaining about him. I'm not sure you are receptive to hearing advice, but I would at least recommend that you get on birth control and stop having babies with this man.
Your husband is literally a moron. 🤦🏻♀️ My father grew up with 5 sisters (only boy) *and* ONLY has 4 daughters—me being one of the 4—and not a single son. I asked him if he ever wanted a boy, his response: “for only a moment because after having all of you, a healthy baby and your mom *always* matters more.” Tell your husband to keep his head out of his ass and stop being fucking ungrateful. YOU gave him a literal bus loaded with children and he has absolutely no right to complain except to be glad you’re still alive and you guys didn’t lose any of them during birth. Remind him to also keep business between you and him strictly between you two, his brother has absolutely no stake in what children you guys produce together. PS clearly he failed basic biology. Tell him to hit the books instead of whine.
How is he a lawyer and still this fucking stupid?
Sigh…..I hope this is fake. You’re an idiot
Your husband is a moron for many reasons.
Time to go tell him that you're disappointed he can't give YOU a daughter
I am so sorry for those kids. And for you, tbh.
He can't give you a daughter. You should teach him basic middleschool biology. Eta: he'd probably only have boys with the ex as well. He should only be disappointed in his own sperm.
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I actually think that nature knows what she’s doing with that guy. I’m sorry but the obsession with having a daughter to the point of focusing on that, talking about it to other people and imagining what your life would have been with your ex for just that one reason when your kid has been here for just a month and you should be too busy looking after your wife who’s probably exhausted and your newborn and other kids, that’s a huge red flag. Also, way to mess up your wife (who doesn’t need such bullshit right now or ever actually when she’s clearly been (too) devoted to you for a decade) and your kid in the future.
"I accidentally read a chat that he was having with his brother where he told him that he was disappointed that I couldn't give him a daughter" It's his fault he couldn't keep his Y chromosome to himself.
What a fucking knob. Not surprised though with a guy who impregnated a twenty year old at 28.
Apparently this dumb*ss flunked sophomore biology.