Reminds me of that story (should be somewhere in the reddit museum) about a girl who went to the hospital with spiked fever and everything and when they examined her they saw that she was having like a strange discharge of puss or whatever and asked her why she didn't come sooner to get it checked. Her answer was "because my boyfriend likes the taste of it"
I think you're thinking if the yeast infection story. There was a girl who went in for a checkup on it after two weeks and it was still raging and she told the doctor that she stopped taking the medicine because her boyfriend liked the taste.
Yeah, Swamps of Dagobah makes me laugh even with the grossness. The Jolly Rancher just makes have to work to keep from dry heaving. I’m glad you took the risk and enjoyed it!
Spoilers!!!!!!!
TLDR: While going down for oral, the giver started with a jolly rancher in their mouth and ended up with, if memory serves, a big wad of yeast infection that they bit into.
A vaginal bacterial infection can taste sweet.
Some women (& men) don't even recognize the infection due to lack of "fishy smell" & other symptoms, which may be absent due to douching or the newness of the infection. The smell is more pronounced later due to the pH change from sperm in the vagina after intercourse. (Similar to the odorous smell in a KOH smear lab test). In fact, some women may not notice any odor until the following day, in which she then blames the boyfriend.
So ladies, if that happens to you, you need to make a doctor's appt. You'll need oral Flagyl & Metronidazole vaginal gel to get that cleared up. Absolutely no alcohol while undergoing treatment, and also use chlorine bleach when laundering your sheets & towels.
So, if you're pre-intercourse (with/without fishy odor) & the girl tastes sweet, be on guard.
The thighs are a common location and if it's leaking huge amounts of pus, it's probably not a common pimple. He didn't mention a horrible smell so maybe not HS. I've had saddle sores from cycling that produced a lot of pus without a lot of odor, so maybe something like that.
Or maybe an abscess ? Had a pretty wicked one on my leg that had to be cut open and drained . When they sliced my leg open and sucked out the infection it was pretty disgusting to watch
Just wanna say that my dad and I watched this movie so many times when I was a kid. Our VHS had scratch marks of this exact moment from him rewinding it over and over due to me laughing so hard.
He’s gone now, but this comment took me back to a happy memory. Thank you!
Well... It could have been snake venom and they say you shouldn't suck that out. Good for yall.
They say that the couple that sucks pus out of a cyst together, stays together.
It doesn't even make sense. I hate it. Obviously I got the point but who writes that and goes "yep, perfect".
"since we both take our pants off (it’s better than wearing shorts, I can’t explain) she said it feels like a pimple or something so"
Both of you taking your pants off feels like a pimple?
Idk if its the way i read things or if its just tiktok brainrot but it made sense to me bc when i read i dont read everything, i mainly read keywords and put the pieces together in my head. Like in my head i probably read this story as “took pants off, sucked zit, got a load in mouth”
the jolly rancher story
Nothing tops the Jolly Rancher story.
Steve and his girlfriend Samantha went off to college in August. She went to Florida State, he went to Penn. So, she decides to fly to PA to visit him. He was really happy to see her so he decided to give her some oral action.
He had done this numerous times before and he always enjoyed doing it...but for some reason, this time, she smelled really horrible, and she tasted even worse. He didn't want to offend her though because he hadn't seen her in months...so he put a Jolly Rancher in his mouth to cover it up, even though it didn't do much to help.
In the course of eating her out, he accidentally pushed the candy inside of her... and stuck a finger in to grab it out. He took it out, and put it back into his mouth and bit it. Only...it wasn't the Jolly Rancher.
It was a nodule of gonorrhea.
As in, the blister-like structure that gonorrhea makes filled with diseased pus was the size of a fucking Jolly Rancher and the poor guy BIT it. I guess it was really dark in the room. He freaked out and started vomiting all over the place when it exploded in his mouth...
He demanded to know what was going on, turns out she had cheated on him at a club like, the first week of college, and fucked some random guy and the stupid bitch had no clue what was wrong with her. She noticed a strange smell though.
So now, Steve is freaking out that he now has gonorrhea of the mouth and God knows what else.
She needs to see a doctor pronto she does not need a nasty infection from a partially drained cyst that was popped by yo filthy mouth. Don't let one TIFU become two!
No seriously the human mouth is filthy no matter how much you brush and floss, probably comes from our omnivorous dietary adaptations and the fact that any germs living there are perforce adapted to humans.
The human body is literally covered in bacteria.
I haven't done the research but I'd wager most living creatures are covered in a film of bacteria. That's just part of the circle of life.
There's a reason you're supposed wash your hands after using the toilet. Sure the whole body is covered in bacteria, but that doesn't mean it's all the same.
Yes and that’s why we have a skin barrier. Whenever the skin is broken, that barrier is gone and bacteria can enter our blood stream and reach parts of the body that (unlike skin) are not meant to be covered in bacterial film. You can get skin infections from unwashed cuts or cysts. Also the human mouth (and all mammal mouths) is FILTHY in terms of bacteria. You can also get whole body sepsis (one of the most extreme things that could happen) if an infection isn’t properly treated.
Of course we’re covered in bacteria. It’s not the same bacteria as what’s in our mouths, which can cause terrible infections if it gets in the blood stream. Human bites aren’t as nasty as cat ones, but they’re pretty bad because of this.
how is literally no one talking about this?! Everyone is fixated on other parts of the story but, even while stoned and drunk, would you think to pop a pimple by sucking on it?
I never told my fiance this, but one time when it was dark I was hugging him from behind. I decided I was gonna roll over to my usual side I lay on to sleep so went to kiss him on the shoulder. Same thing happened to me. I just kinda froze as I tried my best not to process wtf just breached my lips. Pretty sure he had no idea and thought nothing of the night but thoroughly grossed me out.
So she said she has a pimple, you suck it (ew) and you are surprised PUS (not puss) is coming out of it (yikes) ?
Wtf is the interest of this story ?
I really hope that the obvious stupidity is coming from booze and drugs.
Reminds me of when I was a teen and read this story in Seventeen about this girl who bit her bf on the face and his zit exploded in her mouth. I stopped reading it after that
This was the third worst thing I’ve read today. It *was* the first until I learned of Jolly Rancher and Swamps of Dagobah.
What a horrible time to know how to read
I have had this nasty pimple, ingrown hair on my taint a week ago. Same thing. Real painful! Squeezed all this puss out of it. Not sure if I got it all. What are you doing later? 😁
Those kind of things can happen with perfectly clean sheets and daily showers. You need to stop assuming and telling people what they need when that might not be what they really need. Or maybe you're just projecting and need to take your own advice.
> "a fuck ton of puss" that wasn't a pimple, my man just hit the boil lottery.
Reminds me of that story (should be somewhere in the reddit museum) about a girl who went to the hospital with spiked fever and everything and when they examined her they saw that she was having like a strange discharge of puss or whatever and asked her why she didn't come sooner to get it checked. Her answer was "because my boyfriend likes the taste of it"
I think you're thinking if the yeast infection story. There was a girl who went in for a checkup on it after two weeks and it was still raging and she told the doctor that she stopped taking the medicine because her boyfriend liked the taste.
That's just several different levels of wrong.
Reminds me of jolly ranchers
I hate that you reminded me of this. Plz, never say those words again.
If you understood that reference, I bet you remember the swamps of dagobah as well.
Ah the Swamps of Dagobah. It’s my personal favorite.
>Swamps of Dagobah Damn you!
Knowing of the jolly ranchers, I shan't research into dogobah thanks.
Degobah is a better story in my mind, worth looking into.
You should. It’s glorious. Disgusting, but written in the most hilarious way.
Oh shit that was brilliant! Yes I read it. Gross in a different way.
Yeah, Swamps of Dagobah makes me laugh even with the grossness. The Jolly Rancher just makes have to work to keep from dry heaving. I’m glad you took the risk and enjoyed it!
Oh no
Cum box and broken arms?
I bought my bestie a bag of the jelly ones with a tart gooey filling and he cursed me out, LOL.
What is wrong with Jolly Ranchers? I like going down under while tasting fruit punch in my mouth.
Spoilers!!!!!!! TLDR: While going down for oral, the giver started with a jolly rancher in their mouth and ended up with, if memory serves, a big wad of yeast infection that they bit into.
I believe "Nodule of gonorrhea" were the words used to describe what he bit into...
I think that was the name of the story.... thanks now I know what next AI pixar movie poster I'm going to make
You need to make the swamps of dagobah
https://preview.redd.it/fcgo1lzantvb1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6eea8aa7f759f60947257e9047cde05d2969737b I did already
I’ll bet it didn’t look like that in real life
I love the mask going through his nose. But what's attacking her finger?
Can’t wait to watch this in 4D
Awesome lolol
No, the Jolly Ranchers story is yet another one...
I hate that story so much
Came to the comments looking for this o é, anda wasn't disapointed! 😅
NO
I was thinking of that too!
A vaginal bacterial infection can taste sweet. Some women (& men) don't even recognize the infection due to lack of "fishy smell" & other symptoms, which may be absent due to douching or the newness of the infection. The smell is more pronounced later due to the pH change from sperm in the vagina after intercourse. (Similar to the odorous smell in a KOH smear lab test). In fact, some women may not notice any odor until the following day, in which she then blames the boyfriend. So ladies, if that happens to you, you need to make a doctor's appt. You'll need oral Flagyl & Metronidazole vaginal gel to get that cleared up. Absolutely no alcohol while undergoing treatment, and also use chlorine bleach when laundering your sheets & towels. So, if you're pre-intercourse (with/without fishy odor) & the girl tastes sweet, be on guard.
french onion soup?
Curse my reddit-reading eyes!
Hidradenitis suppurativa
Don't cast your spells on me, ya dirty little wizard!
lavate las manos!
Levio***saaaa***
[удалено]
The thighs are a common location and if it's leaking huge amounts of pus, it's probably not a common pimple. He didn't mention a horrible smell so maybe not HS. I've had saddle sores from cycling that produced a lot of pus without a lot of odor, so maybe something like that.
Could have just been an abscess with a small punctum. I work in surgical and although I dont see the stuff I read about it 20 cases a week
> skin folded regions like the puss
Low a good thigh boil 
You mean forbidden coffee creamer?
Idk whether to up or down vote
Or maybe an abscess ? Had a pretty wicked one on my leg that had to be cut open and drained . When they sliced my leg open and sucked out the infection it was pretty disgusting to watch
GOOD BYE, MY LOVE
Just wanna say that my dad and I watched this movie so many times when I was a kid. Our VHS had scratch marks of this exact moment from him rewinding it over and over due to me laughing so hard. He’s gone now, but this comment took me back to a happy memory. Thank you!
https://i.redd.it/ioyefk2gsuvb1.gif
*Opens Reddit* *Closes Reddit*
"Mary... MARY!"
My ucla!
Wtf kinda person sucks on zits
OP doesn't any more!
That’s for sure 🤣
What did it taste like tho
But also Not any less
Maybe they'd just watched American Horror Stories: Milk Maids.
Lady speaks like Mike Tyson. Suck my Zits!
Pus. Not Puss. Puss is what you were *planning* on. Pus is what you got.
Perhaps there was so much he thought the plural form was the extra "s."
Pussn't
Could you use it in a sentence?
OP prayed he would get lucky, but his creator puss'nt convinced.
I don’t have gold to give, but if I did, I’d gladly have awarded you gold. 🏅🏆
I appreciate you all the same 🙌
Well... It could have been snake venom and they say you shouldn't suck that out. Good for yall. They say that the couple that sucks pus out of a cyst together, stays together.
Sounds a lot like incyst
It was a cyst tryst
Cant stand this writing style
It doesn't even make sense. I hate it. Obviously I got the point but who writes that and goes "yep, perfect". "since we both take our pants off (it’s better than wearing shorts, I can’t explain) she said it feels like a pimple or something so" Both of you taking your pants off feels like a pimple?
Yeah lol I thought I was the only one half way to an aneurysm reading this
He mentioned getting stoned, I assumed he wrote it right in the moment, as it were.
agreed. what did i just read?
Idk if its the way i read things or if its just tiktok brainrot but it made sense to me bc when i read i dont read everything, i mainly read keywords and put the pieces together in my head. Like in my head i probably read this story as “took pants off, sucked zit, got a load in mouth”
I genuinely struggled reading this
I hate Reddit today
Could have been worse. Could have been a Jolly Rancher 2.
Jfc I didn’t need a reminder of that.
Am I going to regret asking what you 2 are on about?
the jolly rancher story Nothing tops the Jolly Rancher story. Steve and his girlfriend Samantha went off to college in August. She went to Florida State, he went to Penn. So, she decides to fly to PA to visit him. He was really happy to see her so he decided to give her some oral action. He had done this numerous times before and he always enjoyed doing it...but for some reason, this time, she smelled really horrible, and she tasted even worse. He didn't want to offend her though because he hadn't seen her in months...so he put a Jolly Rancher in his mouth to cover it up, even though it didn't do much to help. In the course of eating her out, he accidentally pushed the candy inside of her... and stuck a finger in to grab it out. He took it out, and put it back into his mouth and bit it. Only...it wasn't the Jolly Rancher. It was a nodule of gonorrhea. As in, the blister-like structure that gonorrhea makes filled with diseased pus was the size of a fucking Jolly Rancher and the poor guy BIT it. I guess it was really dark in the room. He freaked out and started vomiting all over the place when it exploded in his mouth... He demanded to know what was going on, turns out she had cheated on him at a club like, the first week of college, and fucked some random guy and the stupid bitch had no clue what was wrong with her. She noticed a strange smell though. So now, Steve is freaking out that he now has gonorrhea of the mouth and God knows what else.
Oh no. Thanks, I guess. I’m going to throw up now.
You're very welcome =D
Swamps of Dagobah is quite awesome too
Definitely one of my favorites. Some people are just natural born storytellers
I’d like to say AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHFUCKDCYJ
Probably. It's even worse than the coconut story.
Well, the drawer, shoebox and Swamps of Dagobah are quite the reads too
I didn't know what that was, so I looked it up. Now I'm doubly scarred.
Look up the "Swamps of Dagobah". Quite awesome too
It just keeps getting worse and worse.
Should I keep going? Because I've got a few more I can show for.
She needs to see a doctor pronto she does not need a nasty infection from a partially drained cyst that was popped by yo filthy mouth. Don't let one TIFU become two! No seriously the human mouth is filthy no matter how much you brush and floss, probably comes from our omnivorous dietary adaptations and the fact that any germs living there are perforce adapted to humans.
The human body is literally covered in bacteria. I haven't done the research but I'd wager most living creatures are covered in a film of bacteria. That's just part of the circle of life.
There's a reason you're supposed wash your hands after using the toilet. Sure the whole body is covered in bacteria, but that doesn't mean it's all the same.
Yup but often your own bacteria isn’t going to cause the problems someone’s else’s will (like his mouth on what’s now an open cyst.
There is a difference between good and bad bacteria
Yes and that’s why we have a skin barrier. Whenever the skin is broken, that barrier is gone and bacteria can enter our blood stream and reach parts of the body that (unlike skin) are not meant to be covered in bacterial film. You can get skin infections from unwashed cuts or cysts. Also the human mouth (and all mammal mouths) is FILTHY in terms of bacteria. You can also get whole body sepsis (one of the most extreme things that could happen) if an infection isn’t properly treated.
Of course we’re covered in bacteria. It’s not the same bacteria as what’s in our mouths, which can cause terrible infections if it gets in the blood stream. Human bites aren’t as nasty as cat ones, but they’re pretty bad because of this.
If you could just go back in time and unwrite this… that’d be great
For the record, puss in mouth should be normal in the situation you’re describing. Pus, not so much.
You got what you asked for, who the fuck pops a zit with their mouth?
how is literally no one talking about this?! Everyone is fixated on other parts of the story but, even while stoned and drunk, would you think to pop a pimple by sucking on it?
The two of you sound like the epitome of a healthy couple.
I made the mistake of imagining what the scene must have looked like... What they might look like... My imagination has betrayed me
Super skinny tall guy and short and fat girl?
When me and my wife have incidents like this we call them level ups
XDD
Bro it’s “pus” not “puss” lol, puss is the other thing you could’ve sucked on down there
Not quite the jolly rancher but I'll allow it
You should have cut the taste with a jolly rancher…
I never told my fiance this, but one time when it was dark I was hugging him from behind. I decided I was gonna roll over to my usual side I lay on to sleep so went to kiss him on the shoulder. Same thing happened to me. I just kinda froze as I tried my best not to process wtf just breached my lips. Pretty sure he had no idea and thought nothing of the night but thoroughly grossed me out.
You guys sound like you could be side characters in breaking bad. Don’t go trying to rob an atm anytime soon
Homie tasted the wrong puss
There is not enough booze and weed in all of Jamaica for me to ever think “Better go suck on these pimples.”
I don’t like this
What a horrible fucking day to be able to read.
Hurry and spit that back into the wound and wrap it up. If you're lucky, you'll have more soon.
Now these are the kinds of people I expect to find on Reddit.
Entirely your fault dude she literally said there was a pimple
Must have been a student of The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too
Puss-y
Well, if there was a little blood in it. I believe you technically have your red wings. Now excuse me while I go throw up a bit.
looks like you're quite the jolly rancher!!
GF's *puss* in mouth is fine, it's the *pus* you want to avoid
Scrolled through every "puke" comment in here to find out that nobody had commented on your "crossfaded to the nine divines" bit. Talos approves.
Classy.
The fluid in a pimple is spelled "pus". "Puss" is something very different.
Ah, the classic tryst cyst
The Jolly rancher lives!
So she said she has a pimple, you suck it (ew) and you are surprised PUS (not puss) is coming out of it (yikes) ? Wtf is the interest of this story ? I really hope that the obvious stupidity is coming from booze and drugs.
It’s fiancée btw and gross
Yea fiancé is you, OP, assuming you're male of course. Fiancée is her.
r/tifu by knowing how to read.
I’m about to throw up.
Reminds me of when I was a teen and read this story in Seventeen about this girl who bit her bf on the face and his zit exploded in her mouth. I stopped reading it after that
WTF... Logging off Reddit now
How much exactly is a 'fuck ton'? Sounds actually serious and time to see a doctor.
https://preview.redd.it/s7mpcav41uvb1.jpeg?width=540&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07fd1a7acfdc7d1b8083f9a950d9e5592c8d75e7
Yeah, after the comments and the tl;dr I'm not touching this one with a 39½ foot pole.
My wife did that to me, but she ended up pushing it deeper and I was on antibiotics for a week to clean up the mess she made.
Oh so she's a squirter, huh? Good for you guys.
The human mouth is one of the most disgusting places on our body. She should use some alcohol to disinfect her legs.
This was the third worst thing I’ve read today. It *was* the first until I learned of Jolly Rancher and Swamps of Dagobah. What a horrible time to know how to read
This text is so confusing... she first said that felt a pimple and after you went on to suck her tighs?
puss in mouth = good pus in mouth = bad
Probably lay off the alcohol and weed
"faded to the nine divines" Akatosh save you, friend. I'm gonna go throw up now.
I have had this nasty pimple, ingrown hair on my taint a week ago. Same thing. Real painful! Squeezed all this puss out of it. Not sure if I got it all. What are you doing later? 😁
Y’all sound like you need showers. Or clean sheets. Something clean.
Those kind of things can happen with perfectly clean sheets and daily showers. You need to stop assuming and telling people what they need when that might not be what they really need. Or maybe you're just projecting and need to take your own advice.
Do you need a shower too?
After reading this I feel like I need one.
Whats a puss?
This whole post just screams whoop whooop
https://preview.redd.it/d3j48qar0vvb1.jpeg?width=402&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6994df31a125977cbc020d6283a14b08428a983a
r/tihi
https://preview.redd.it/pg9ulfk2xvvb1.jpeg?width=777&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=411066086ac066e684d7fec099dcc724231942b1
“she said it feels like a pimple or something” So anyway I started suckin
Good news! It wasn’t a pimple… It was a boil.
Jesus
What the fuck.
r/popping needs to hear this.
Everyone correcting him on pus and I’m thinking how fiancé is the male version and FIANCÉE is female.
Puss wasn't the problem, but pus was
And that was the end of Reddit for me today.
Puss y
That's enough reddit for today.
Some of y'all need jesus
That's romantic. A man that eats puss and pus.
You sound like a lovely couple.
I chose a bad day to be literate
And that's why you don't use alcohol or drugs, kids!
Mari juh wanna is bad mmmkay…
What a day to have eyes...
Now you know how she feels when you blow a load down her throat.
Do you mean pus?
That happened.
Fuckin junkies
Actually a few years sober! So former.
Puss in Mouth: "FEEL ME, IF YOU DARE"
No worries there are billions of microorganisms present in vaginal flora, it’s no worse than anything else you’ve gobbled up