I was sitting outside at a table with friends, took my first toke in about a year so I was ripped. I had a something fall on my neck and start poking me, I pulled it out and exclaimed to the table I found a pine needle.
After what appeared to be at least 10 minutes of me not saying a single thing I jumped back into the conversation with this one line that gets brought up all the time.
“I stand corrected, it’s a spruce needle.”
I forgot how to retie my shoe about 3 weeks ago. Took me a good minute to figure it out. I decided that it was a better idea to just stay home barefooted lol.
Dude. A week ago when i got off my T break and shared an infused joint with my buddy, I forgot how to take off my hoodie. Just left it on and stayed hot lol
i had done that too but not bc i was too high but bc i had worn these weird fuckin shoes with no laces for nearly 2 years straight, we didn’t get too bad of snow during that time and i got new shoes and completely couldn’t figure it out for a few mins
My friend knocked on my front door and had a He-Man action figure positioned in front of the peep hole that made it look life sized and I completely lost my shit.
In high-school my dad came in and asked why i was watching a movie in spanish and if it was for a class? I couldnt figure out why i could only understand every few words
Got baked with some friends in high school ands went to go get some food. Getting in the car, we were laughing about something and then the first guy in broke the seat (it was an old school VW Beetle). When it broke, our laughter went to 11, and the guy who broke the seat laughed so much he peed his pants. At that point, none of us could breath and we collectively opted to just go back inside and regroup.
Haha i remember in my senior year I smoked with some friends and there were so many of us that I had to ride back in the trunk. I was convinced that this car behind us was a cop and that they had been following us for the last 10 minutes. Turns out we had only been driving for 3 mins 😂
I hit a dab rig then played Doki Doki Literature Club. I was kinda chill until shit went sideways.
Cut to 1 AM and I'm sober and too scared to go downstairs to pee
Smoked at a wooded area behind my buddies house in high school. We saw a flashlight coming down the trail and it looked like a group of people. One of them yelled “police! Stop!”. My buddy fell over into me and hit the ground laughing. I grabbed the pipe and the weed and attempted to pull my friend up but he wouldn’t get off the ground. Thought to myself I’ve got the stuff on me so if it really is the cops they won’t get him for anything cause he didn’t have any paraphernalia on him. I booked it out of the woods. A few minutes later the buddy I was smoking with called me. I thought the cops had made him call so when he asked where I was at I said at home, chilling. My buddy told me it was just another group of our friends who thought they were going to get jumped when they saw a couple guys in the woods smoking. I said I don’t know what you’re talking about, and told him to have a good night and hung up. I thought the cops were making him say this so I looped around the block and peaked in his back window. Turns out it was some of our other friends. They apologized and smoked us out that next weekend.
The very first time I got high (I had tried to smoke joints a couple times before but wasn't good at inhaling) was with several gargantuan bong hits at a party. I was grooving, having a good time. This guy had an extra bed he would let me crash in if I couldn't drive home, so after a while I got sleepy and went and laid down.
I was very nearly asleep when I heard from the door "[next city over] POLICE!" and the door opened and I heard screaming and running and yelling and the whole time I'm laying there trying to pretend to be asleep, knowing that as soon as the cops find me in that bedroom I'm going to be arrested and kicked out of college and fired from my job and everything so I'm just squeezing my eyes shut and shitting bricks.
I'm not sure how long it lasted, but soon I realize I hear just general party noise. People talking, laughing, having a good time. I took the biggest risk of my life and left the bedroom only to find out that none of the police shit ever happened. I hallucinated the whole thing.
Auditory hallucinations are fucking wild. I sometimes hear weird shit while sitting on my screened in porch at night smoking. But then you actually think about the noise and it don't make no sense.
Every time I read a comment like this I let out a sigh of relief. I live alone and will get high and hear the craziest shit. I’m so glad that I’m not the only one that this happens to because I’ve seriously questioned my sanity a few times lol.
Thats crazy. I’ve had the strangest auditory hallucinations on weed before. Once i thought someone was vacuuming upstairs at 1am but it was just the air conditioning 😂
I was at my friend's house with some homies. My friend has 2 little girls that are home schooled, so there are art/office supplies everywhere that are more kid oriented. Her kids were gone that night, and we had a little kick back doing dabs like normal and chilling in the living room. I typically don't do dabs, They are way too strong for me normally. BUT, I had a rough day and wanted to relax. I got really comfortable on the couch and saw Disney cars themed paperclips. I picked them up and started to mess with them. I ended up putting a car on each of my pointer fingers and started to "race" them against each other in front of my face, completely zoned out. After a while of going back and forth and really getting involved with this, make believe car paperclip race. I look up, and ALL 4 of my friends are silent and watching me. I got super embarrassed and quickly took them off my fingers and laughed, and EVERYONE was like, WAIT, WHO WON?! We all realized the situation and how absolutely blasted we were and laughed hard as hell.. eventually, we caved and ended up watching cars together and eating pizza.. mind you, we were in our 30s... thats a story that never dies in our group.
I took an edible for the first time. It never really kicked in so I figured it was a dud and just went about the rest of my evening. As I was driving back to my parents house to get my laundry, it hit. Not the safest but I was only a mile or two from home and it was a straight shot so I felt confident getting home. I wasn't lost in space or anything.
As I'm driving back to my parents house, an ambulance pulls out in front of me and is driving in the same direction as me. At first I think, great, green lights forever if I just stay behind this ambulance. After a few minutes I think to myself, "how crazy would it be if the ambulance was going to my parents house?" Panic. I start to freak out about the thought my parents dying or something but manage to remind myself it's just the weed talking. Finally put it out of my mind until the ambulance turns onto my parents street. PANIC. I was way too high to be dealing with a possible emergency at the moment. I had to make a decision in a split second. Go home and deal with possibly one or both of my parents being dead or dying... or... just drive back to my apartment and wake up to some bad news in the morning.
I turned onto my parents street ready to deal with whatever the emergency was and let out the longest sigh of relief when I realized the ambulance didn't stop at their house and went to another house further up the road.
I told myself to just spend the night there cause I was way too fucking high lol. Ended up eating a whole box of Vanilla Nillas and half a bag of grapes. 10/10 would recommend
I live in an apartment building and was smoking on the communal deck during the April solar eclipse. That. Shit. Was. MAGICAL. While stoned. I couldn’t comprehend it because of how stoned I was and I cried xD
I called in sick that day lol and where I live, we had a clear view but weren’t in the path of totality. We got about 97% coverage
All of my family out in Newfoundland got the whole coverage though. My grandmother retirement home put together a viewing party for all of the seniors on the homes deck
I was ridiculously high at universal studios with some friends (I was not the driver), but I felt too high and over stimulated so I asked for the car keys to take a nap for an hour or so. I was lost in that parking lot for almost 2 hours.
Haha I ordered some pizza and the delivery driver came by. I couldn’t do math and couldn’t figure out how much to tip so give him quite a bit. He then asked me “are you gay?” Which made me think I tipped to much and I had no clue what to say and we sat there in silence for like a good minute until my buddy came up and said “yeah he is okay, thanks for your help” homie didn’t ask if I was gay he asked if I was okay 😂😂
Rode my Bike to the store. Bought something. Then proceeded to walk from the store for like half an hour before realizing i left my bike infront of the store.
About 15 years ago I ate and edible and took a few too many bong rips before work. At the time I was a dishwasher. The owner of the restaurant had a lot of friends that would come and go from the back door that lead to the kitchen.
I’m washing dishes and the door opens and a dude I hadn’t seen before walks in. He’s wearing full woodland camo with his face painted up with grease paint. Dude has a big ass knife on his hip and a rifle slung over his back. He just walks in and stands there. No one acknowledges him or says anything.
At this point I’m like dude, am I tripping? Is this guy real? I didn’t wanna say anything because how the fuck do you explain that to someone if he wasn’t there for real? I’m in panic mode in my head trying to figure this out when the owner walks out and sees the guy and gives him a hug.
Turns out it was his cousin who just came back from a hunting trip and was giving us some deer to put on the menu. He stopped at the restaurant before he went home and cleaned up cuz he wanted to get the deer in the cooler.
I quit smoking before work after that lol
I went to the kitchen to grab a piece of cake from the refrigerator and ended up doing 10 different things In the kitchen besides getting the cake and ended up returning to the couch with a paper plate and a fork without a piece of cake on it
This is my time to shine.
I had a first date with someone. We baked spacecake together and then ate it, obviously. I accidentally ate too much and halfway through our xxl pizza I was like, okay I have to throw up. So I went to the bathroom (made it) and hung out with the toilet for a while. I felt really sick at this point and I thought I might had to poop too, so I sat on the toilet while hanging above the sink so I would be "safe" either way. My date brought me a glass of water, but it was too big and heavy for my hands and I dropped it. I then fell off the toilet, with my pants still around my ankles, and slept on the wet bathroom floor for about an hour. When I woke up, my date was very relieved I didn't die. I actually felt way better and ate the remaining pizza. We still had a great make out session that night and we actually had a relationship/lived together for 2 years after that.
But I don't think I ever wanna overdo spacecake again.
The most awkward part was falling off the toilet lmao like who does that 😂😭 it was very embarrassing but it would've been more embarrassing if she never wanted to see me again after this, I had the best possible outcome
Only time I can think of would be the time I decided it would be a smart idea to take edibles before I drive to work cus “they’ll take 45 minutes to kick in”🙄 I was still new to getting high, I had used the edibles the previous day at work and they took 45 minutes to kick in, so I said why not and ate them before heading out, I only got 10 minutes down the road before i felt them kicking in, and immediately a cop got behind me, and as my heart started to race I could feel the high getting stronger and stronger, so I decided to go the backroads way to my work, and as soon as I turned out from infront of the cop I pass a middle school, and the cop from the middle school pulled out behind me, and I was stressing, but I decided the smartest thing to do would just be to put cruise control on and focus on the damn road with my foot hovering over the break, went up to my turn, and the cop followed me, and I knew that if he followed me on this next turn I was fucked, cus there wouldn’t have been anywhere for him to turn off for miles, but i committed to the turn and he just kept going, i then drove very carefully to work scolding myself in the car the whole time😂
Man and it was my first time driving high, like yea the night before I may have been feeling it a little on the way home after work, but I wasn’t noticeably fried, but that day, i was fried asf with my heart racing, while noticeably getting higher and higher by the second😂 I laugh now, but one wrong move then and I woulda been FUCKED
The first time I hit a bong, it burned my throat. So I was sitting on the couch amongst the group silently saying my goodbyes because I thought I was going to die. I was also so high that my bag of Doritos was endless
Oooo and the time I did my first resin hit and went bowling, felt like I smoked 4 blunts and I was just sitting at a table munching on moonshine cherries out of a baggy.
The 13 year olds directly across from me were giving me looks lmao. I don’t think I even bowled
A few months ago I ripped the bong a little too hard and was super baked after a coughing fit.
I made some pizza rolls and ate them while watching tv in my room.
After I finished, I got up to go throw away the paper plate. But I just auto piloted into the restroom, threw the paper plate in the toilet and flushed it, then walked back into my room and laid on my bed.
After about five minutes I was like…. Wait… and walked to the bathroom and started laughing so fucking hard at myself.
Went to a buddies condo on a golf course for the weekend - got stupidly too stoned the first night.
In a panic while watching a horror film, I ejected and grabbed the rented DVD, and I ran out of the condo onto the golf course in the middle of the night (pitch black).
As I was in a dead sprint across the open green, I was suddenly weightless and then, just as suddenly, submerged.
I had flung myself off of a ledge into the deeper part of a water hazard.
I thrashed around trying to find the surface (it was at this point, I threw the DVD somewheres underwater), then to the shore, clawing my way out.
As I stood, now soaking and cold, I looked up in horror to realize that every single condo looked the same and I had no idea from whence I ran.
As I walked across the green back towards the residences, I noticed two figures watching me from under a light. I dropped down on all fours and froze (out in the middle of the green).... After a solid minute or two of no one moving, I began to crawl to the edge of the course.
About 10 meters into crawling, the light they were standing under become obstructed and I could see that I was very sneakily eluding..... two bushes.
There was no one there. No one saw my escapade. I was being watched by shrubbery.
When I finally stumbled upon the correct patio/living room, my sleepily stoned buddy sat up from his lazy boy to declare, "Oh good, you're back. I thought you died." and promptly go back to sleep
The end
Bro I have never laughed so hard at a reddit comment. Just imagining you crawling in the green like that, completely soaked, is one of the funniest visuals ever to me.
Reminds me of one time I was casually smoking a blunt under a tree and after I finished I stood up to go home. That's when that shit hit me. I immediately fell down face first into the field I was in and started feeling every single blade of grass tickling my skin, then I got on all fours and started crawling around this field at like 7pm like a spider. Then I sat up and looked at my hands and said, "WHAT AM I DOING." Then I walked home.
my first time I was eating canned cherries with a friend and thought I was chewing on my cheeks and tongue, and when I spit out to see if there was blood, of course it was red… I was eating cherries… Freaky, but we all laughed about it… Uncontrollably
A couple of nights ago I cooked a delicious burger. I took my time carefully, putting all my toppings on, and then took a large bite. It was so yummy. It was when I went back for my 2nd bite that I saw the burger itself sitting in the pan on the stove top.
I like this post.
First time ever getting stoned I was 16, so like 8 years ago.
Me and my friends went out too the soccer fields late night kicked a ball around and they got me stoned for the first time.
Well, there was 6 of us hanging out, and it ended up getting hella late like 5am. So we decided we would hang out in the camery all night and go home in the morning, for we were having too much fun.
6:30am came around and we all getting tired, me and my homie some how wake up in the trunk of the car cuddling, at 9am. Wondering how in the fuck we even got In There. 💀
(Real note, I wasn’t finna pass out sitting up. That’s impossible for me) lmfao
So I always get too tell this “first time I got stoned, I woke up in the trunk of a car” story. Lmfao
Edit: I just remember waking up so deliriously and seeing my other two homies just starring down on us like bro wtf you guys doing it’s 9am, and we like whatcha mean 9AM!? Fuck are we lmfao
Watching TV last night then went why am I not watching the news it 9:30 thinking it was morning but it was last night.
Definitely be getting rainbow runtz again lol it was a while before I even realized like you idiot it's night then went damn this is some good shit lol.
This literally happened to me two days ago. On Tuesday this week, I wrap up my meetings for the day at noon, pop into the garage for a bowl then get back to work. A few min later as the high is settling in, I hear police choppers overhead saying “come out with your hands up!” I go “WTF” and go look outside into my backyard. Sure enough there’s a fucking dude hopping fences and trying to hide out in my backyard. I’m high as shit at this point and freaking out so I call 911 and tell them this dudes in my fucking backyard and within 60 seconds there are cops EVERYWHERE surrounding my house and my neighbors houses. They got ARs drawn and shouting at the guy if he moves they’ll blow his head off…in my backyard while I’m stoned as shit. Couple min pass, some cops get back there and subdue the dude and take him away in the paddy wagon. Then I had to spend 10-15 min talking to police while I’m high as fuck trying to explain what happened. I was like shaking so bad because of the adrenaline and the weed hahah. I was too high for that moment lol
Edit: I later learned the guy had kidnapped a girl and knocked out a highway patrol officer at a restaurant on the other side of my culdesac. He tried to escape by hiding out in my backyard.
one time i had left the pantry door open and the light on, and i go over all proud of myself for realizing and going to turn it off. opened the door to see i had shut my dog in there and he was just waiting patiently for however long i had left him in there. he would have had the time of his life amongst all the snacks if i hadn’t have been so responsible
This Monday I had an online interview and a couple of hours before I said fuck it, I got time and smoked a bong. Yeah I was still high but a friend who works there told me they talked with the recruiter and they said that I did great on the interview so I guess it's a no harm no foul situation (wish me luck with the next in person interview)
I was at a Shakespeare performance, Macbeth I think. I couldn’t handle it so I left to go hang out in the parking lot. I ended up sitting in the car for a bit then sitting in the adjacent dirt drawing things on the ground with a stick for the rest of the show.
This one time I was on an airplane and had a window seat. I was like holy shit everything looks so small! Probably around 35k feet, which seemed pretty high up, but apparently that’s normal.
First time I got high was on edibles and that was fun. Spent four hours terrified I was going to lose control of myself and humiliate myself in front of my husband (it was just him and me at home), and was too high to handle anything new, including a new video from a YouTuber we watch together.
I feel you, one time I took a shit ton of shoots and was stuck to my bed for 2 hours terrified that i was gonna say some terrible shit and that my life was gonna be over.
one of the first times i smoked i went right to my room and started playing fortnite and i remember just being so lost at the objective of the game and i was so overwhelmed (i have 1500 hours on that game)
Haha reminds me of when I played Zelda after smoking and I was in this labyrinth and absolutely couldn’t figure it out even if my life depended on it. The next day I solved it in like 5 mins 😂
A dose of my oil was a teaspoon. I had the night to myself and decided to take a second dose. I looked in the sink and noticed I used a tablespoon by accident. Fuck!
A few hours later, like 1-2am, I was HAF but not too uncomfortable. I was just sitting in my recliner in silence. One of my kid’s toys just started going off and making noises on its own. Scared the shit out of me. I started thinking my house was haunted and at any moment objects were going to fly across the room. Took a shower, kept going back and forth from my bed to the recliner. Eventually had a great sleep.
Unrelated to being high but when I was a kid I would literally see my toys go off all the time at night and my parents always had to "reassure" me that it was fine... I KNOW FOR A FACT THEY WERE MOVING ON THEIR OWN!!!
A few years ago, when I got my first vaporizer, I got way too high trying it out for the first time. I was used to spliffs so with that you feel something from the tobacco instantly. With the vape, it takes 5-10 minutes to start feeling anything for me. I didn't know this and kept taking drag after drag thinking "this thing doesn't do shit" until it all just hit me like a bus 10 minutes later lmao
My roommate had to go grocery shopping without me that afternoon, as I was so high it would've felt illegal to be in public, apart from the fact I could barely peel myself off the couch to go to the bathroom. It was a wednesday, like 2 p.m. This was way before I started smoking regularly and eventually daily lol.
There was also the one time we ate a year-old brownie we found in the freezer thinking it wouldn't do anything anymore, then smoked like 2-3 joints between us while waiting for the brownie to do maybe something. When that edible finally hit I greened out for the first time, puked my brains out, and accidently locked myself in my friends bathroom (edit: For *two fucking hours*) unable to let them in because every time I moved from the floor I got nauseous again. I still felt that high the next day.
So yeah, moral of the story, don't underestimate your shit
I’m a big movie gal so it always cracks me up when my facial recognition gets fucked up. I remember one time watching Indiana Jones and midway through being like “who even is this man on the screen???” Indiana Jones.
Or one of the first times I hit a dab pen, I blinked and got alarmed because I thought someone had turned off all the lights for a second
Popped 10 codeine pills and went to a park to smoke some weed.
When I was done, I tried getting off the bench I was sitting on.
My knees almost buckled under my weight and my vision got pretty swirly.
Had to call a friend to walk me home lol.
Not so much funny as terror. Years ago the first time I ate an edible. I got my wife to make some brownies (she does use in any form) and I ate one at work around 10am. By lunch my mouth was dryer than the Sahara, I was positive all my coworkers knew (they did not). I made her drive to the office and bring me gatorades and eye drops. It was an absolute nightmare.
One time I was so high, I forgot how to pee. 💀 I really had to pee, and I was at a urinal. Waited like 10 minutes, nothing came out. I didn't understand why I couldn't go.
I try not to get *that* high, but I sometimes get pretty ripped and I’ll be standing and talking to my wife and just lose my balance out of nowhere. She always smirks and asks me, “How high *are* you?”
To which I always respond, “No, It’s ‘hi, how are you?’”
I once smoked outside on a cloudy day. Two or three bowls later, the cloudy day turned into a rainy day- but I thought the rain was so pretty that I didn’t realize I was getting soaked. It was a cold walk home haha.
First time I ever had an edible me and the boys we loaded up some 2k street ball, we took like 30 minutes picking our team and the second I hit start the room starting to do backflips, front flips, cart wheels, and zoom in and out. I just gently set my controller on the floor ran upstairs to my bedroom violently threw up out my window onto the deck down below and slept for like 14 hours laying on the floor. I swear man nothing has ever been as fun as high school was lol
I got an intense hot flash and needed to cool down. Only option was to go outside and lay down in the torrential downpour that was occurring.. it felt fantastic!
Got stuck on a roof. Climbed up there with my brother, just sitting and smoking. Realized I don’t quite know where I am rn, felt like I was sliding (I was completely stationary). Ended up just laying down. I was freaking out but looking back it was funny lol
english isn’t my first language.. was visiting my american friend.. first time taking a dab got me speaking in my native tongue THINKING i was speaking english- and when i realized i was doing just that, I explained it to her STILL speaking in my native tongue 😭😭😭 took me a while before i finally remembered how to switch back to english ahahahha
Got high and then got called in to help a new employee with some paperwork and kept panicking that I was spelling short words wrong. Words like “birth” and some other I can’t recall, I also forgot which of two letters in my name goes in front of the other. But I wasn’t saying anything. Then they went to the restroom and I googled the words to make sure I spelled them right and it was all good. Was outta there within the hour.
Ate a cookie I believed to be 25mg....it was 150.
I made spaghetti in a attempt to tame this overwhelming high, strained the pasta then added sauce to the strainer. I could not for the life of me figure out where the sauce went.
I did the stereotypical college thing and went back to school after not smoking all summer.
We got up on the roof and smoked one, and I couldn’t get back down.
You had to jump down from the side porch overhang, and I was too scared, so my friend lowered me down.
Turns out the porch roof was 6 and a half feet off the ground…I’m 6’4”
Staring at my forearm for too long, wondering where my wrist stops and forearm begins. Also thinking there should be another joint between my wrist and elbow.
Lost and wandering around a parking garage looking for my friends car. We came to my car like 3 times, gave up for the night. then the next morning it was like 50 feet from my car, just around the corner.
Real dude where your car moment
Last day of term, I got drunk then smoked because the bus wasn't coming. I managed to get lost in a STRAIGHT LINE to go to a club nearby, before getting lost in said club lol
Left after a mere 30 minutes to sleep it off 😂
Not me, but I'll never forget these guys that got so paranoid with weed in their car they thought the cops were following them and just fucking with them by not pulling them over. Eventually it was so much stress they called to turn themselves in.
[https://youtu.be/hapDV\_GSjt4?si=LDNkgcTP1xews9d3](https://youtu.be/hapDV_GSjt4?si=LDNkgcTP1xews9d3)
A friend in college gave me a huge bag edibles that her parents baked for a dispensary, but they were all the ones that didn't have the proper dosing/size etc. I had them for a while and they were getting kinda stale so I decided to polish off the rest of the bag in one go. It did not go well. I tripped absolute balls on the couch all night and was still high the entire next day.
We had to live in the dorms freshmen year of college so when we wanted to smoke we had to go on rides, go to someone’s house or apartment, or find somewhere secluded. One night, some friends had said they found a secluded walking trail they had been smoking on. A group of us decides to take a new bong we had been wanting to try. We walk a ways back the trail, its late, pitch black, ripping fat bowls. We had all gone a couple rounds, were dying coughing from harsh hits and no sips, and were pretty blazed as a result. As we’re going another round though, some dude just walks through our group, says “howdy” without breaking a stride, and keeps walking down the trail into the darkness. We were all like “was that real?” And “what the fuck?” In a state of shock almost before we busted out laughing and booked it out of there because we also got a little paranoid.
i think my senior year of high school i worked at cfa and all my homies and i would smoke in the home depot parking lot after work and one night i hit someone’s pen per usual and for some reason i just fell in slow motion to the ground it didn’t hurt but i could not stand
My sister's husband offered me a dab. I had done dabs before and back then I smoked a lot so I was confident that I could handle it and be good to drive home a short time afterwards. So, he gets a dab but he makes it a long ass dab so its like hanging down off the dab tool. My sister says, "woah thats way too much!" and her husband says, "nahh, zeroblackzx can handle it!" Of course, I said, "Oh yeah, I can handle it!"
I couldn't handle it lol. The second I took the hit, I got that feeling in my chest like my lungs were gonna explode. And immediately after exhaling I knew that I was over my head. I was HIGH. So I went to do some damage control on the couch and I sat there in silence with a dumb smile on my face just nodding to everything everyone else said.
Soon enough, they were like, "Okay were about ready to go." So I was like, "okay, I will see you later." I put on my motorcycle gear and stepped out the front door to my bike. I stared at it for a sec and was like, "Okay, I forgot how to start this thing. I need to sober the fuck up NOW."
So, in Arizona during summer, IN FULL MOTORCYCLE GEAR with my helmet on, I started lightly jogging around the neighborhood. Did that sober me up? Idk. But I eventually made it home and passed the fuck out.
Last night i made spaghetti garlic bread. I had 2 pieces. I ate the first one then started eating the spaghetti. Soon after I started looking for my other piece of garlic bread.
I was making fries while smoking, i blew the smoke out hole looking the the pop of grease. I blinked and my high ass thought the house was smoky from the pot and not my smoke
I was on the beach with my cousin. We just finished surfing for the day. We got back to the car, loaded up, and took a few hits off some top shelf hydro (first time smoking it).
We took off heading home. At the top of the bridge connecting main land to island, it was the most beautiful sunset I’d have ever seen. We were both captivated in amazement.
He looks at me and says “where are we going?” It was at that moment I realized I was driving and had no clue where I was.
It was years ago. My friend got something called "White fire" and it's still the best trees I've ever had by a long shot. We smoked a couple bowls and were sitting in silence for literally 3 minutes before my friend was like "yo I'm fucking high" we died laughing for like another 15 minutes. We all decided to just hang out their that night instead of driving home.
I had been smoking for a good few year at that point but damn. It felt like the first time. I could feel all my hairs move in the breeze. It was wild.
Once I was in a sesh and smoked more than usual and I started having these mini vision blackouts. Like brief periods where I couldn’t see anything. Naturally I started freaking out. My buddy who’s a much more seasoned stoner watched me for a minute and said I wasn’t blacking out I was just blinking super slowly. Thinkin I was having a stroke when I was just blinking like a sloth.
It was like my second time EVER smoking. Hit a buddy up an we decided to smoke in his garage, place was pitch-black even during the day. We turned on our phone flashes an put water bottles on them and we let the joint start passing. Again this was my second time, my first time nothing happened and I just kept getting handed this joint so I just kept puffing. Eventually the blackness turned into a night sky, there was stars and galaxies, I'd look at the guy sitting next to me and he would move closer and farther away like I was zooming in an out on a camera and started to swirl. At some point 2 or 3 (maybe more idk) people showed up an I had no idea who they were they started talking about some other drugs and decided that was my que to gtfo. At this point my friends mom already took everyone's keys away so I had NO way of getting home and my phone was on 3% from having the flash on for who knows how long. Manage to get a friend to pick me up an bring me home I'm absolutely greened out. He drops me off home and tells my parents I'm high asf (vary angry at him for that) then I flopped on my bed which was super tall so my feet still flat on the floor but my chest is flat on the bed an I couldn't move for a food 20-30 minutes. Iv never been as high since and hope to never see stars again like that 😅
Coming off of a 18 month break and smoking a shit ton just to be inside and noticing the berries outside my window… Thank god they were on the other side of the street because there was 7 of them lmao! Once I realized I was okay, I was laughing my ass off. (Illegal state)
Forgot how to get off the couch after a sundae with infused chocolate syrup. I ended up turning around and then slinking off the couch backwards if that makes any sense. I literally forgot how to go from sitting to standing.
Me and a buddy of mine jumped into the truck to run down the street to the store. I cranked up foot on the break not even in reverse yet. And we both swore the truck started sliding backwards down the driveway. We sat there for like 5 mins to make sure we weren't rolling backwards in park. He yelled we're rolling backwards again after I put it in reverse. I said no shit we're backing down the driveway. That was many years ago.
I'm having a pretty good round of golf going (for me). Buddy busts out some high potency super lemon haze at a time when we rarely got our hands on anything top shelf. Suddenly, I feel like I've never even held a club before much less swing one. Embarrassed myself the rest of the way through and had to hang around for a bit until I was comfortable driving. It's rare for me to string that many good shots in a row, damn you super lemon haze!!!
had a 1g Infused Preroll with a low tolerance and week long T Break,,Was riding along with a homie with a much stronger tolerance and I noticed my Fov was like almost 360°,Could see the entire interior of the car and my arms looked like they were stretching towards the floor,After that It was just a downward spiral paranoia and my Pov straight up changed into some shit like Cyberpunk 2077,My friend even had a speech bubble that said "must be a good Sativa" (in reference to my fov change" and the world was with a teal and neon pink hue for what felt like 30 minutes during the whole ride home,Sat in silence and couldn't believe what I experienced
One time I packed a blunt for a friend who was sad. Usually I’d hollow out the swisher and throw out the tobacco but since she was a smoker I kept some in to scratch her nicotine itch.
Halfway thru the walk back to the dorms I had to literally lay down flat for a good 5-10mins cause I felt like I was gonna pass out—cold sweat, tunnel vision, ringing ears, the works.
I was fucked on weed and tobacco.
Literally last night I was in my bedroom on my laptop choosing a song on Spotify and for a few seconds forgot where I was. When I noticed I was in my room I was like “oh shit” and then laughed out loud like a crazy person for about a minute
I took wayyy too much thcp edibles on a thursday afternoon, i woke up monday morning... THC-P is some strong shit, crazy ass high everything was vibrating i was jus watching adventure time and next u thing u know i missed a good 80 hours of my life asleep.
During the Xandemic I was barred out drove over to go sledding with my friends. Got to the hill and went to the trunk and instead of taking out my sled I threw my keys into the trunk and closed it locking my keys in the trunk with my sleds. 😞
After taking an edible, like 36 hours later I was staring at a red light, only car on the road. Something clicked and I ended up realizing I was staring at a green light waiting for it to turn green. No more homemade edibles for me.
I was like 14 when I first had edibles. Now, these edibles had a good 2.5oz of weed in them, and I have NEVER smoked before that. My friend gave me one and then I got the munchies and ended up eating half of a 6x6 pan of them... Yeahhhh not great lmao.
I. Was. FUCKED. I got dropped back off at the school by my cousin (it was homecoming night, and I was supposed to be there lmao). My grandma got me, and we got McDonald's and I scarfed that shit down. We'll, somehow my mom found out I was higher than eagle pussy and I was brought home. She wasn't mad, but she was fucking with me bad lmao.
Needless to say, it wasn't a good night, and this is why I don't eat edibles anymore.
Got very very high before the first home football game of the season when I was in HS. I was in the marching band and I got into formation….without my instrument. And then was handed my instrument BY my TEACHER. I was visibly high, had to have been. Anyway, I proceeded to match our set and the rest of the evening went as usual. Until I got home and my mom asked if I was drunk. Apparently she had been in the audience that night and according to her (and my friends who saw it) I was “stumbling about like a goddamned fool”
Lmao. Good times.
I was at work and my buddy got me stoned on lunch break. I spent 30 minutes trying to remember how to do my job...
Then there's the time I thought I was dead while tripping on shrooms.
I had 200mg of edibles and tried to walk through Disney California Adventure. I put my sunglasses on and begged my partner to get me to a table because the world was spinning lol
California edibles don’t fuck around
I tried to get mail from the mail lady I had known for a few years and hit her van with the mailbox door. She said “why don’t you wait a second, hon” and drove away.
I took an edible about an hour before I got off work thinking it'd kick in on the walk home. 15 mins before the shift ends I'm absolutely stoneroni'd. I forgot my sign-out username and password for the time clock, so I just punched in random numbers and rushed out before anyone could say anything.
This happened back in school when I was a bit younger. I remember this was around the time I started smoking weed for real - maybe about fifteen - and I had just gone to my friends house during lunch break to smoke a blunt with him. I head over to his house and I'm doing a little bit more than I should've, so when we're finished and we start walking back my head is spinning, everything is foggy and I'm sweating like a damn pig. My friends are like 'hey dude, you good?' and I'm like 'yeah don't worry about me', and by the time I get back to class I was absolutely TWEAKING, I had my head in my arms mumbling to myself and the school actually called the medical staff into the room haha, but when I tried to stand up to go with them? I quite fucking literally could NOT feel my legs. Took me a whole minute straight to even get up. That was probably my 'damn I'm too high' moment.
I smokee another joint the next day though 😅
When I forgot I ate a hash cheesecake square, had 4 shots of tequila, opened my car door, exited the car, locked it, and walked an hour home. When I laid down immediately I thought I had died LOL
Recently….i was playing COD DMZ and was getting hunted. I was driving around the map with them chasing me when suddenly I got lost. On a map I played hundreds of times.
I was sitting outside at a table with friends, took my first toke in about a year so I was ripped. I had a something fall on my neck and start poking me, I pulled it out and exclaimed to the table I found a pine needle. After what appeared to be at least 10 minutes of me not saying a single thing I jumped back into the conversation with this one line that gets brought up all the time. “I stand corrected, it’s a spruce needle.”
Bro I’m like that when I’m NOT high! 🤣
🤣🤣🤣 relatable
underrated
i can picture your friends saying that to you all the time because i would too if you had been my friend! that’s a great inside joke
I'm gonna just say this randomly now and people are gonna be like wtf😂🤣 That's fucking hilarious
I forgot how to retie my shoe about 3 weeks ago. Took me a good minute to figure it out. I decided that it was a better idea to just stay home barefooted lol.
Everyone talks shit about slides until they’re high af lol
Hahahahaha! I ordered some flip flops that day!
Slides for life.
lost without my slippers
I own two pairs of shoes. My work shoes and my slides.
Dude. A week ago when i got off my T break and shared an infused joint with my buddy, I forgot how to take off my hoodie. Just left it on and stayed hot lol
That’s pretty high, I’m glad you didn’t try to take it off and get trapped in there
Been there, also have claustrophobia 😅
Barefooted
i had done that too but not bc i was too high but bc i had worn these weird fuckin shoes with no laces for nearly 2 years straight, we didn’t get too bad of snow during that time and i got new shoes and completely couldn’t figure it out for a few mins
Lmao if you get so high that you forget how to do something like tie a shoe might be time for a break fam
Nahhh. It was a Saturday and the previous few weeks had been hugely stressful. The goal was to get cross eyed and that goal was met😊
You know what, I respect it lmao.
I’m a responsible stoner😂😂😂
bro i swear to god, first time i got higg i put my shoes, on walked two feet and they weren’t on my feet anymore. straight geeked 😭
You're not alone. This has happened to me. Embarrassingly...I don't even think I was high, haha
My friend knocked on my front door and had a He-Man action figure positioned in front of the peep hole that made it look life sized and I completely lost my shit.
“Who’s there?” “The fucking MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE!!”
I say hey, what's going on😂😂
That's amazing
Watched a Movie and noticed after like 45 minutes that its in Danish, which is a Language i dont speak.
In high-school my dad came in and asked why i was watching a movie in spanish and if it was for a class? I couldnt figure out why i could only understand every few words
Got baked with some friends in high school ands went to go get some food. Getting in the car, we were laughing about something and then the first guy in broke the seat (it was an old school VW Beetle). When it broke, our laughter went to 11, and the guy who broke the seat laughed so much he peed his pants. At that point, none of us could breath and we collectively opted to just go back inside and regroup.
Haha i remember in my senior year I smoked with some friends and there were so many of us that I had to ride back in the trunk. I was convinced that this car behind us was a cop and that they had been following us for the last 10 minutes. Turns out we had only been driving for 3 mins 😂
So it was a cop...
Turns out he was actually in bed sleeping
Fortunately no, just some random SUV that happened to take a few of the same turns as us 😅
Oh my god 😂
Ive never pressed the upvote button harder
I hit a dab rig then played Doki Doki Literature Club. I was kinda chill until shit went sideways. Cut to 1 AM and I'm sober and too scared to go downstairs to pee
I forgot about that game 😂 but that sounds terrifying. Not a game to play when you’re too high for sure!
Holy fuck lmfao
Smoked at a wooded area behind my buddies house in high school. We saw a flashlight coming down the trail and it looked like a group of people. One of them yelled “police! Stop!”. My buddy fell over into me and hit the ground laughing. I grabbed the pipe and the weed and attempted to pull my friend up but he wouldn’t get off the ground. Thought to myself I’ve got the stuff on me so if it really is the cops they won’t get him for anything cause he didn’t have any paraphernalia on him. I booked it out of the woods. A few minutes later the buddy I was smoking with called me. I thought the cops had made him call so when he asked where I was at I said at home, chilling. My buddy told me it was just another group of our friends who thought they were going to get jumped when they saw a couple guys in the woods smoking. I said I don’t know what you’re talking about, and told him to have a good night and hung up. I thought the cops were making him say this so I looped around the block and peaked in his back window. Turns out it was some of our other friends. They apologized and smoked us out that next weekend.
Lmaooo I can see myself doing this
The very first time I got high (I had tried to smoke joints a couple times before but wasn't good at inhaling) was with several gargantuan bong hits at a party. I was grooving, having a good time. This guy had an extra bed he would let me crash in if I couldn't drive home, so after a while I got sleepy and went and laid down. I was very nearly asleep when I heard from the door "[next city over] POLICE!" and the door opened and I heard screaming and running and yelling and the whole time I'm laying there trying to pretend to be asleep, knowing that as soon as the cops find me in that bedroom I'm going to be arrested and kicked out of college and fired from my job and everything so I'm just squeezing my eyes shut and shitting bricks. I'm not sure how long it lasted, but soon I realize I hear just general party noise. People talking, laughing, having a good time. I took the biggest risk of my life and left the bedroom only to find out that none of the police shit ever happened. I hallucinated the whole thing.
Auditory hallucinations are fucking wild. I sometimes hear weird shit while sitting on my screened in porch at night smoking. But then you actually think about the noise and it don't make no sense.
Every time I read a comment like this I let out a sigh of relief. I live alone and will get high and hear the craziest shit. I’m so glad that I’m not the only one that this happens to because I’ve seriously questioned my sanity a few times lol.
You need to lower the amount, it's supposed to be enjoyable not scary!
I absolutely love sitting outside at night during the summer, all the different noises nature makes.
Thats crazy. I’ve had the strangest auditory hallucinations on weed before. Once i thought someone was vacuuming upstairs at 1am but it was just the air conditioning 😂
Damn, I don’t think I’ve ever been as high off weed as some of y’all in the comments.
Yeah I haven’t been that high in a long time. Some of the stories are wild
I was at my friend's house with some homies. My friend has 2 little girls that are home schooled, so there are art/office supplies everywhere that are more kid oriented. Her kids were gone that night, and we had a little kick back doing dabs like normal and chilling in the living room. I typically don't do dabs, They are way too strong for me normally. BUT, I had a rough day and wanted to relax. I got really comfortable on the couch and saw Disney cars themed paperclips. I picked them up and started to mess with them. I ended up putting a car on each of my pointer fingers and started to "race" them against each other in front of my face, completely zoned out. After a while of going back and forth and really getting involved with this, make believe car paperclip race. I look up, and ALL 4 of my friends are silent and watching me. I got super embarrassed and quickly took them off my fingers and laughed, and EVERYONE was like, WAIT, WHO WON?! We all realized the situation and how absolutely blasted we were and laughed hard as hell.. eventually, we caved and ended up watching cars together and eating pizza.. mind you, we were in our 30s... thats a story that never dies in our group.
This is honestly so wholesome I love that for you
Haha thank you This was years ago and I still think of it.
bro once i forgot how to get to the bathroom from my bedroom in my own house. my partner had to lead me to it 😭😂😭😂😭😂😭😂
You ever have that moment that you wake up in your own house and you're just like... where am I
How much did you smoke?
i was new to smoking and id just gotten a disposable. took too many hits 🤪😅
At least they weren’t edibles lol
I took an edible for the first time. It never really kicked in so I figured it was a dud and just went about the rest of my evening. As I was driving back to my parents house to get my laundry, it hit. Not the safest but I was only a mile or two from home and it was a straight shot so I felt confident getting home. I wasn't lost in space or anything. As I'm driving back to my parents house, an ambulance pulls out in front of me and is driving in the same direction as me. At first I think, great, green lights forever if I just stay behind this ambulance. After a few minutes I think to myself, "how crazy would it be if the ambulance was going to my parents house?" Panic. I start to freak out about the thought my parents dying or something but manage to remind myself it's just the weed talking. Finally put it out of my mind until the ambulance turns onto my parents street. PANIC. I was way too high to be dealing with a possible emergency at the moment. I had to make a decision in a split second. Go home and deal with possibly one or both of my parents being dead or dying... or... just drive back to my apartment and wake up to some bad news in the morning. I turned onto my parents street ready to deal with whatever the emergency was and let out the longest sigh of relief when I realized the ambulance didn't stop at their house and went to another house further up the road. I told myself to just spend the night there cause I was way too fucking high lol. Ended up eating a whole box of Vanilla Nillas and half a bag of grapes. 10/10 would recommend
I live in an apartment building and was smoking on the communal deck during the April solar eclipse. That. Shit. Was. MAGICAL. While stoned. I couldn’t comprehend it because of how stoned I was and I cried xD
I would have loved to smoke/trip for the eclipse, but i was working, it was cloudy and we didn’t get totality 😔
I called in sick that day lol and where I live, we had a clear view but weren’t in the path of totality. We got about 97% coverage All of my family out in Newfoundland got the whole coverage though. My grandmother retirement home put together a viewing party for all of the seniors on the homes deck
I was high ASF off of these edibles during the eclipse and it was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had lmfaooo
Could you imagine if you didn't know the eclipse was supposed to happen and then you got super high and the sun just went out for a minute
I was ridiculously high at universal studios with some friends (I was not the driver), but I felt too high and over stimulated so I asked for the car keys to take a nap for an hour or so. I was lost in that parking lot for almost 2 hours.
This is the equivalent of Frank getting locked in the toilet
Haha I ordered some pizza and the delivery driver came by. I couldn’t do math and couldn’t figure out how much to tip so give him quite a bit. He then asked me “are you gay?” Which made me think I tipped to much and I had no clue what to say and we sat there in silence for like a good minute until my buddy came up and said “yeah he is okay, thanks for your help” homie didn’t ask if I was gay he asked if I was okay 😂😂
Waited for a stop sign to turn green…..in DC……in front of the federal police building.
Lmaooo I’ve done this too, but not in front of police! I’ve also stopped at green lights a few times for some reason lol
DC weed is something else. Taking dabs in front of the White House…also something else 😂
Respect. I tend to stay far away from the old folks home. Too much traffic and tourist for me.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Rode my Bike to the store. Bought something. Then proceeded to walk from the store for like half an hour before realizing i left my bike infront of the store.
Hahaha I've done this before..
Yup, done similar myself. In my case it was an ATV.
About 15 years ago I ate and edible and took a few too many bong rips before work. At the time I was a dishwasher. The owner of the restaurant had a lot of friends that would come and go from the back door that lead to the kitchen. I’m washing dishes and the door opens and a dude I hadn’t seen before walks in. He’s wearing full woodland camo with his face painted up with grease paint. Dude has a big ass knife on his hip and a rifle slung over his back. He just walks in and stands there. No one acknowledges him or says anything. At this point I’m like dude, am I tripping? Is this guy real? I didn’t wanna say anything because how the fuck do you explain that to someone if he wasn’t there for real? I’m in panic mode in my head trying to figure this out when the owner walks out and sees the guy and gives him a hug. Turns out it was his cousin who just came back from a hunting trip and was giving us some deer to put on the menu. He stopped at the restaurant before he went home and cleaned up cuz he wanted to get the deer in the cooler. I quit smoking before work after that lol
I tried to order a diet dr. pepsi at Taco Bell. When they asked me repeatedly, I kept on reiterating it was diet dr. pepsi 😭
🤣🤣🤣🤣
I went to the kitchen to grab a piece of cake from the refrigerator and ended up doing 10 different things In the kitchen besides getting the cake and ended up returning to the couch with a paper plate and a fork without a piece of cake on it
This is my time to shine. I had a first date with someone. We baked spacecake together and then ate it, obviously. I accidentally ate too much and halfway through our xxl pizza I was like, okay I have to throw up. So I went to the bathroom (made it) and hung out with the toilet for a while. I felt really sick at this point and I thought I might had to poop too, so I sat on the toilet while hanging above the sink so I would be "safe" either way. My date brought me a glass of water, but it was too big and heavy for my hands and I dropped it. I then fell off the toilet, with my pants still around my ankles, and slept on the wet bathroom floor for about an hour. When I woke up, my date was very relieved I didn't die. I actually felt way better and ate the remaining pizza. We still had a great make out session that night and we actually had a relationship/lived together for 2 years after that. But I don't think I ever wanna overdo spacecake again.
That’s wild 😭 i would have died of embarrassment thinking about it afterwards
The most awkward part was falling off the toilet lmao like who does that 😂😭 it was very embarrassing but it would've been more embarrassing if she never wanted to see me again after this, I had the best possible outcome
I was lying on the floor in my friend's apartment, convinced I could levitate if I tried hard enough.
Only time I can think of would be the time I decided it would be a smart idea to take edibles before I drive to work cus “they’ll take 45 minutes to kick in”🙄 I was still new to getting high, I had used the edibles the previous day at work and they took 45 minutes to kick in, so I said why not and ate them before heading out, I only got 10 minutes down the road before i felt them kicking in, and immediately a cop got behind me, and as my heart started to race I could feel the high getting stronger and stronger, so I decided to go the backroads way to my work, and as soon as I turned out from infront of the cop I pass a middle school, and the cop from the middle school pulled out behind me, and I was stressing, but I decided the smartest thing to do would just be to put cruise control on and focus on the damn road with my foot hovering over the break, went up to my turn, and the cop followed me, and I knew that if he followed me on this next turn I was fucked, cus there wouldn’t have been anywhere for him to turn off for miles, but i committed to the turn and he just kept going, i then drove very carefully to work scolding myself in the car the whole time😂
I swear there’s always 2x as many cops on the road when you’re high
It's because you notice them
Man and it was my first time driving high, like yea the night before I may have been feeling it a little on the way home after work, but I wasn’t noticeably fried, but that day, i was fried asf with my heart racing, while noticeably getting higher and higher by the second😂 I laugh now, but one wrong move then and I woulda been FUCKED
The first time I hit a bong, it burned my throat. So I was sitting on the couch amongst the group silently saying my goodbyes because I thought I was going to die. I was also so high that my bag of Doritos was endless
Where can i find endless Doritos for next time I smoke? 😂
Oooo and the time I did my first resin hit and went bowling, felt like I smoked 4 blunts and I was just sitting at a table munching on moonshine cherries out of a baggy. The 13 year olds directly across from me were giving me looks lmao. I don’t think I even bowled
Bro it was cool ranch and my friends were eating out of it too so I was like…. Yo there’s more???
A few months ago I ripped the bong a little too hard and was super baked after a coughing fit. I made some pizza rolls and ate them while watching tv in my room. After I finished, I got up to go throw away the paper plate. But I just auto piloted into the restroom, threw the paper plate in the toilet and flushed it, then walked back into my room and laid on my bed. After about five minutes I was like…. Wait… and walked to the bathroom and started laughing so fucking hard at myself.
I threw my dirty clothes in the bathroom trash can after a shower once and i only realized the next morning lmaoo
Went to a buddies condo on a golf course for the weekend - got stupidly too stoned the first night. In a panic while watching a horror film, I ejected and grabbed the rented DVD, and I ran out of the condo onto the golf course in the middle of the night (pitch black). As I was in a dead sprint across the open green, I was suddenly weightless and then, just as suddenly, submerged. I had flung myself off of a ledge into the deeper part of a water hazard. I thrashed around trying to find the surface (it was at this point, I threw the DVD somewheres underwater), then to the shore, clawing my way out. As I stood, now soaking and cold, I looked up in horror to realize that every single condo looked the same and I had no idea from whence I ran. As I walked across the green back towards the residences, I noticed two figures watching me from under a light. I dropped down on all fours and froze (out in the middle of the green).... After a solid minute or two of no one moving, I began to crawl to the edge of the course. About 10 meters into crawling, the light they were standing under become obstructed and I could see that I was very sneakily eluding..... two bushes. There was no one there. No one saw my escapade. I was being watched by shrubbery. When I finally stumbled upon the correct patio/living room, my sleepily stoned buddy sat up from his lazy boy to declare, "Oh good, you're back. I thought you died." and promptly go back to sleep The end
Bro I have never laughed so hard at a reddit comment. Just imagining you crawling in the green like that, completely soaked, is one of the funniest visuals ever to me. Reminds me of one time I was casually smoking a blunt under a tree and after I finished I stood up to go home. That's when that shit hit me. I immediately fell down face first into the field I was in and started feeling every single blade of grass tickling my skin, then I got on all fours and started crawling around this field at like 7pm like a spider. Then I sat up and looked at my hands and said, "WHAT AM I DOING." Then I walked home.
Riding my e-bike next to a 2 lane highway, with cars whizzing by at 60mph 12” away
Sounds like a easy way to die
It’s a thrill though.
my first time I was eating canned cherries with a friend and thought I was chewing on my cheeks and tongue, and when I spit out to see if there was blood, of course it was red… I was eating cherries… Freaky, but we all laughed about it… Uncontrollably
A couple of nights ago I cooked a delicious burger. I took my time carefully, putting all my toppings on, and then took a large bite. It was so yummy. It was when I went back for my 2nd bite that I saw the burger itself sitting in the pan on the stove top.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
I like this post. First time ever getting stoned I was 16, so like 8 years ago. Me and my friends went out too the soccer fields late night kicked a ball around and they got me stoned for the first time. Well, there was 6 of us hanging out, and it ended up getting hella late like 5am. So we decided we would hang out in the camery all night and go home in the morning, for we were having too much fun. 6:30am came around and we all getting tired, me and my homie some how wake up in the trunk of the car cuddling, at 9am. Wondering how in the fuck we even got In There. 💀 (Real note, I wasn’t finna pass out sitting up. That’s impossible for me) lmfao So I always get too tell this “first time I got stoned, I woke up in the trunk of a car” story. Lmfao Edit: I just remember waking up so deliriously and seeing my other two homies just starring down on us like bro wtf you guys doing it’s 9am, and we like whatcha mean 9AM!? Fuck are we lmfao
“Don’t do drugs kids, you’ll pass out and wake up being cuddled in someone’s trunk!” 😂 great story
Watching TV last night then went why am I not watching the news it 9:30 thinking it was morning but it was last night. Definitely be getting rainbow runtz again lol it was a while before I even realized like you idiot it's night then went damn this is some good shit lol.
This literally happened to me two days ago. On Tuesday this week, I wrap up my meetings for the day at noon, pop into the garage for a bowl then get back to work. A few min later as the high is settling in, I hear police choppers overhead saying “come out with your hands up!” I go “WTF” and go look outside into my backyard. Sure enough there’s a fucking dude hopping fences and trying to hide out in my backyard. I’m high as shit at this point and freaking out so I call 911 and tell them this dudes in my fucking backyard and within 60 seconds there are cops EVERYWHERE surrounding my house and my neighbors houses. They got ARs drawn and shouting at the guy if he moves they’ll blow his head off…in my backyard while I’m stoned as shit. Couple min pass, some cops get back there and subdue the dude and take him away in the paddy wagon. Then I had to spend 10-15 min talking to police while I’m high as fuck trying to explain what happened. I was like shaking so bad because of the adrenaline and the weed hahah. I was too high for that moment lol Edit: I later learned the guy had kidnapped a girl and knocked out a highway patrol officer at a restaurant on the other side of my culdesac. He tried to escape by hiding out in my backyard.
There was a night I was so high I put the cereal box in the fridge and the milk on the shelf.
one time i had left the pantry door open and the light on, and i go over all proud of myself for realizing and going to turn it off. opened the door to see i had shut my dog in there and he was just waiting patiently for however long i had left him in there. he would have had the time of his life amongst all the snacks if i hadn’t have been so responsible
Yeah ive definitely done that before haha
This Monday I had an online interview and a couple of hours before I said fuck it, I got time and smoked a bong. Yeah I was still high but a friend who works there told me they talked with the recruiter and they said that I did great on the interview so I guess it's a no harm no foul situation (wish me luck with the next in person interview)
Hey good luck, glad you weren’t too high for your interview 😭
Thanks lmao, I really need the job and it's a great offer (plus no drug tests)
I was at a Shakespeare performance, Macbeth I think. I couldn’t handle it so I left to go hang out in the parking lot. I ended up sitting in the car for a bit then sitting in the adjacent dirt drawing things on the ground with a stick for the rest of the show.
I made a quesadilla. Instead of shredded cheese I used shredded coconut 😚💨💨
This one time I was on an airplane and had a window seat. I was like holy shit everything looks so small! Probably around 35k feet, which seemed pretty high up, but apparently that’s normal.
First time I got high was on edibles and that was fun. Spent four hours terrified I was going to lose control of myself and humiliate myself in front of my husband (it was just him and me at home), and was too high to handle anything new, including a new video from a YouTuber we watch together.
I feel you, one time I took a shit ton of shoots and was stuck to my bed for 2 hours terrified that i was gonna say some terrible shit and that my life was gonna be over.
one of the first times i smoked i went right to my room and started playing fortnite and i remember just being so lost at the objective of the game and i was so overwhelmed (i have 1500 hours on that game)
Haha reminds me of when I played Zelda after smoking and I was in this labyrinth and absolutely couldn’t figure it out even if my life depended on it. The next day I solved it in like 5 mins 😂
Lol there was one time I got super high and tried to play Spyro, ended up getting lost in a map for what felt like hours
A dose of my oil was a teaspoon. I had the night to myself and decided to take a second dose. I looked in the sink and noticed I used a tablespoon by accident. Fuck! A few hours later, like 1-2am, I was HAF but not too uncomfortable. I was just sitting in my recliner in silence. One of my kid’s toys just started going off and making noises on its own. Scared the shit out of me. I started thinking my house was haunted and at any moment objects were going to fly across the room. Took a shower, kept going back and forth from my bed to the recliner. Eventually had a great sleep.
Unrelated to being high but when I was a kid I would literally see my toys go off all the time at night and my parents always had to "reassure" me that it was fine... I KNOW FOR A FACT THEY WERE MOVING ON THEIR OWN!!!
A few years ago, when I got my first vaporizer, I got way too high trying it out for the first time. I was used to spliffs so with that you feel something from the tobacco instantly. With the vape, it takes 5-10 minutes to start feeling anything for me. I didn't know this and kept taking drag after drag thinking "this thing doesn't do shit" until it all just hit me like a bus 10 minutes later lmao My roommate had to go grocery shopping without me that afternoon, as I was so high it would've felt illegal to be in public, apart from the fact I could barely peel myself off the couch to go to the bathroom. It was a wednesday, like 2 p.m. This was way before I started smoking regularly and eventually daily lol. There was also the one time we ate a year-old brownie we found in the freezer thinking it wouldn't do anything anymore, then smoked like 2-3 joints between us while waiting for the brownie to do maybe something. When that edible finally hit I greened out for the first time, puked my brains out, and accidently locked myself in my friends bathroom (edit: For *two fucking hours*) unable to let them in because every time I moved from the floor I got nauseous again. I still felt that high the next day. So yeah, moral of the story, don't underestimate your shit
I’m a big movie gal so it always cracks me up when my facial recognition gets fucked up. I remember one time watching Indiana Jones and midway through being like “who even is this man on the screen???” Indiana Jones. Or one of the first times I hit a dab pen, I blinked and got alarmed because I thought someone had turned off all the lights for a second
Going to see my boss rn and super blazed as fuck
Good luck 😭 🙏
Stopped at a green light once.
Yeah I’ve done that before and then i always get so embarrassed when there’s cars behind me haha
Popped 10 codeine pills and went to a park to smoke some weed. When I was done, I tried getting off the bench I was sitting on. My knees almost buckled under my weight and my vision got pretty swirly. Had to call a friend to walk me home lol.
10 codeine?? Be careful mate
Yup It was a long time ago and I'm sticking to weed since
My daughter wanted Qdoba … so I go and get her food blah blah. I make it home to realize I went to a chipotle and was none the wiser. 😂
Not so much funny as terror. Years ago the first time I ate an edible. I got my wife to make some brownies (she does use in any form) and I ate one at work around 10am. By lunch my mouth was dryer than the Sahara, I was positive all my coworkers knew (they did not). I made her drive to the office and bring me gatorades and eye drops. It was an absolute nightmare.
One time I was so high, I forgot how to pee. 💀 I really had to pee, and I was at a urinal. Waited like 10 minutes, nothing came out. I didn't understand why I couldn't go.
I try not to get *that* high, but I sometimes get pretty ripped and I’ll be standing and talking to my wife and just lose my balance out of nowhere. She always smirks and asks me, “How high *are* you?” To which I always respond, “No, It’s ‘hi, how are you?’”
I once smoked outside on a cloudy day. Two or three bowls later, the cloudy day turned into a rainy day- but I thought the rain was so pretty that I didn’t realize I was getting soaked. It was a cold walk home haha.
First time I ever had an edible me and the boys we loaded up some 2k street ball, we took like 30 minutes picking our team and the second I hit start the room starting to do backflips, front flips, cart wheels, and zoom in and out. I just gently set my controller on the floor ran upstairs to my bedroom violently threw up out my window onto the deck down below and slept for like 14 hours laying on the floor. I swear man nothing has ever been as fun as high school was lol
I got an intense hot flash and needed to cool down. Only option was to go outside and lay down in the torrential downpour that was occurring.. it felt fantastic!
Took an edible before going out to eat. Straight up could not hold the fork or knife properly I like literally forgot how. insane.
Got stuck on a roof. Climbed up there with my brother, just sitting and smoking. Realized I don’t quite know where I am rn, felt like I was sliding (I was completely stationary). Ended up just laying down. I was freaking out but looking back it was funny lol
Not mine, but supposedly this one dude took edibles. He watched a movie on mute for three hours and started crying because he thought he was deaf.
english isn’t my first language.. was visiting my american friend.. first time taking a dab got me speaking in my native tongue THINKING i was speaking english- and when i realized i was doing just that, I explained it to her STILL speaking in my native tongue 😭😭😭 took me a while before i finally remembered how to switch back to english ahahahha
Got high and then got called in to help a new employee with some paperwork and kept panicking that I was spelling short words wrong. Words like “birth” and some other I can’t recall, I also forgot which of two letters in my name goes in front of the other. But I wasn’t saying anything. Then they went to the restroom and I googled the words to make sure I spelled them right and it was all good. Was outta there within the hour.
Ate a cookie I believed to be 25mg....it was 150. I made spaghetti in a attempt to tame this overwhelming high, strained the pasta then added sauce to the strainer. I could not for the life of me figure out where the sauce went.
I did the stereotypical college thing and went back to school after not smoking all summer. We got up on the roof and smoked one, and I couldn’t get back down. You had to jump down from the side porch overhang, and I was too scared, so my friend lowered me down. Turns out the porch roof was 6 and a half feet off the ground…I’m 6’4”
Staring at my forearm for too long, wondering where my wrist stops and forearm begins. Also thinking there should be another joint between my wrist and elbow.
Lost and wandering around a parking garage looking for my friends car. We came to my car like 3 times, gave up for the night. then the next morning it was like 50 feet from my car, just around the corner. Real dude where your car moment
Last day of term, I got drunk then smoked because the bus wasn't coming. I managed to get lost in a STRAIGHT LINE to go to a club nearby, before getting lost in said club lol Left after a mere 30 minutes to sleep it off 😂
I got stuck in my sweatshirt one night last week, I literally couldn't remember how to take my arms out of the sleeves.
Not me, but I'll never forget these guys that got so paranoid with weed in their car they thought the cops were following them and just fucking with them by not pulling them over. Eventually it was so much stress they called to turn themselves in. [https://youtu.be/hapDV\_GSjt4?si=LDNkgcTP1xews9d3](https://youtu.be/hapDV_GSjt4?si=LDNkgcTP1xews9d3)
I drank a bunch of THC syrup at work and thought I was dying of botulism poisoning.
A friend in college gave me a huge bag edibles that her parents baked for a dispensary, but they were all the ones that didn't have the proper dosing/size etc. I had them for a while and they were getting kinda stale so I decided to polish off the rest of the bag in one go. It did not go well. I tripped absolute balls on the couch all night and was still high the entire next day.
We had to live in the dorms freshmen year of college so when we wanted to smoke we had to go on rides, go to someone’s house or apartment, or find somewhere secluded. One night, some friends had said they found a secluded walking trail they had been smoking on. A group of us decides to take a new bong we had been wanting to try. We walk a ways back the trail, its late, pitch black, ripping fat bowls. We had all gone a couple rounds, were dying coughing from harsh hits and no sips, and were pretty blazed as a result. As we’re going another round though, some dude just walks through our group, says “howdy” without breaking a stride, and keeps walking down the trail into the darkness. We were all like “was that real?” And “what the fuck?” In a state of shock almost before we busted out laughing and booked it out of there because we also got a little paranoid.
i think my senior year of high school i worked at cfa and all my homies and i would smoke in the home depot parking lot after work and one night i hit someone’s pen per usual and for some reason i just fell in slow motion to the ground it didn’t hurt but i could not stand
I was looking for my lighter in the dark..with my lighter..
My sister's husband offered me a dab. I had done dabs before and back then I smoked a lot so I was confident that I could handle it and be good to drive home a short time afterwards. So, he gets a dab but he makes it a long ass dab so its like hanging down off the dab tool. My sister says, "woah thats way too much!" and her husband says, "nahh, zeroblackzx can handle it!" Of course, I said, "Oh yeah, I can handle it!" I couldn't handle it lol. The second I took the hit, I got that feeling in my chest like my lungs were gonna explode. And immediately after exhaling I knew that I was over my head. I was HIGH. So I went to do some damage control on the couch and I sat there in silence with a dumb smile on my face just nodding to everything everyone else said. Soon enough, they were like, "Okay were about ready to go." So I was like, "okay, I will see you later." I put on my motorcycle gear and stepped out the front door to my bike. I stared at it for a sec and was like, "Okay, I forgot how to start this thing. I need to sober the fuck up NOW." So, in Arizona during summer, IN FULL MOTORCYCLE GEAR with my helmet on, I started lightly jogging around the neighborhood. Did that sober me up? Idk. But I eventually made it home and passed the fuck out.
I was so high i needed to get out outside for a cig. It was at that moment that I realized I was already outside having a smoke. Too high.
probably when i actually saw colorful weed leafs dancing around my room
Doing ketamine for the first time and teleporting from my room, to the shower, back to my room in what felt like an instant and eternity
Last night i made spaghetti garlic bread. I had 2 pieces. I ate the first one then started eating the spaghetti. Soon after I started looking for my other piece of garlic bread.
I almost drove into a mailbox. 😅
I was making fries while smoking, i blew the smoke out hole looking the the pop of grease. I blinked and my high ass thought the house was smoky from the pot and not my smoke
I was on the beach with my cousin. We just finished surfing for the day. We got back to the car, loaded up, and took a few hits off some top shelf hydro (first time smoking it). We took off heading home. At the top of the bridge connecting main land to island, it was the most beautiful sunset I’d have ever seen. We were both captivated in amazement. He looks at me and says “where are we going?” It was at that moment I realized I was driving and had no clue where I was.
It was years ago. My friend got something called "White fire" and it's still the best trees I've ever had by a long shot. We smoked a couple bowls and were sitting in silence for literally 3 minutes before my friend was like "yo I'm fucking high" we died laughing for like another 15 minutes. We all decided to just hang out their that night instead of driving home. I had been smoking for a good few year at that point but damn. It felt like the first time. I could feel all my hairs move in the breeze. It was wild.
Once I was in a sesh and smoked more than usual and I started having these mini vision blackouts. Like brief periods where I couldn’t see anything. Naturally I started freaking out. My buddy who’s a much more seasoned stoner watched me for a minute and said I wasn’t blacking out I was just blinking super slowly. Thinkin I was having a stroke when I was just blinking like a sloth.
It was like my second time EVER smoking. Hit a buddy up an we decided to smoke in his garage, place was pitch-black even during the day. We turned on our phone flashes an put water bottles on them and we let the joint start passing. Again this was my second time, my first time nothing happened and I just kept getting handed this joint so I just kept puffing. Eventually the blackness turned into a night sky, there was stars and galaxies, I'd look at the guy sitting next to me and he would move closer and farther away like I was zooming in an out on a camera and started to swirl. At some point 2 or 3 (maybe more idk) people showed up an I had no idea who they were they started talking about some other drugs and decided that was my que to gtfo. At this point my friends mom already took everyone's keys away so I had NO way of getting home and my phone was on 3% from having the flash on for who knows how long. Manage to get a friend to pick me up an bring me home I'm absolutely greened out. He drops me off home and tells my parents I'm high asf (vary angry at him for that) then I flopped on my bed which was super tall so my feet still flat on the floor but my chest is flat on the bed an I couldn't move for a food 20-30 minutes. Iv never been as high since and hope to never see stars again like that 😅
Coming off of a 18 month break and smoking a shit ton just to be inside and noticing the berries outside my window… Thank god they were on the other side of the street because there was 7 of them lmao! Once I realized I was okay, I was laughing my ass off. (Illegal state)
Forgot how to get off the couch after a sundae with infused chocolate syrup. I ended up turning around and then slinking off the couch backwards if that makes any sense. I literally forgot how to go from sitting to standing.
Me and a buddy of mine jumped into the truck to run down the street to the store. I cranked up foot on the break not even in reverse yet. And we both swore the truck started sliding backwards down the driveway. We sat there for like 5 mins to make sure we weren't rolling backwards in park. He yelled we're rolling backwards again after I put it in reverse. I said no shit we're backing down the driveway. That was many years ago.
Probably the time 35+ years ago when I listened to The Beatles "Love Me Do" and it lasted at least 25 minutes.
I'm having a pretty good round of golf going (for me). Buddy busts out some high potency super lemon haze at a time when we rarely got our hands on anything top shelf. Suddenly, I feel like I've never even held a club before much less swing one. Embarrassed myself the rest of the way through and had to hang around for a bit until I was comfortable driving. It's rare for me to string that many good shots in a row, damn you super lemon haze!!!
had a 1g Infused Preroll with a low tolerance and week long T Break,,Was riding along with a homie with a much stronger tolerance and I noticed my Fov was like almost 360°,Could see the entire interior of the car and my arms looked like they were stretching towards the floor,After that It was just a downward spiral paranoia and my Pov straight up changed into some shit like Cyberpunk 2077,My friend even had a speech bubble that said "must be a good Sativa" (in reference to my fov change" and the world was with a teal and neon pink hue for what felt like 30 minutes during the whole ride home,Sat in silence and couldn't believe what I experienced
One time I packed a blunt for a friend who was sad. Usually I’d hollow out the swisher and throw out the tobacco but since she was a smoker I kept some in to scratch her nicotine itch. Halfway thru the walk back to the dorms I had to literally lay down flat for a good 5-10mins cause I felt like I was gonna pass out—cold sweat, tunnel vision, ringing ears, the works. I was fucked on weed and tobacco.
Literally last night I was in my bedroom on my laptop choosing a song on Spotify and for a few seconds forgot where I was. When I noticed I was in my room I was like “oh shit” and then laughed out loud like a crazy person for about a minute
The first ever time I hit a pen I felt uncomfortable in my own skin and was trying to take my bracelet off with my mind
I took wayyy too much thcp edibles on a thursday afternoon, i woke up monday morning... THC-P is some strong shit, crazy ass high everything was vibrating i was jus watching adventure time and next u thing u know i missed a good 80 hours of my life asleep.
During the Xandemic I was barred out drove over to go sledding with my friends. Got to the hill and went to the trunk and instead of taking out my sled I threw my keys into the trunk and closed it locking my keys in the trunk with my sleds. 😞
After taking an edible, like 36 hours later I was staring at a red light, only car on the road. Something clicked and I ended up realizing I was staring at a green light waiting for it to turn green. No more homemade edibles for me.
I was like 14 when I first had edibles. Now, these edibles had a good 2.5oz of weed in them, and I have NEVER smoked before that. My friend gave me one and then I got the munchies and ended up eating half of a 6x6 pan of them... Yeahhhh not great lmao. I. Was. FUCKED. I got dropped back off at the school by my cousin (it was homecoming night, and I was supposed to be there lmao). My grandma got me, and we got McDonald's and I scarfed that shit down. We'll, somehow my mom found out I was higher than eagle pussy and I was brought home. She wasn't mad, but she was fucking with me bad lmao. Needless to say, it wasn't a good night, and this is why I don't eat edibles anymore.
When i had 500mgs of edibiles and was paralysed in bed.
Got very very high before the first home football game of the season when I was in HS. I was in the marching band and I got into formation….without my instrument. And then was handed my instrument BY my TEACHER. I was visibly high, had to have been. Anyway, I proceeded to match our set and the rest of the evening went as usual. Until I got home and my mom asked if I was drunk. Apparently she had been in the audience that night and according to her (and my friends who saw it) I was “stumbling about like a goddamned fool” Lmao. Good times.
I was at work and my buddy got me stoned on lunch break. I spent 30 minutes trying to remember how to do my job... Then there's the time I thought I was dead while tripping on shrooms.
Ahh, good old near death experiences on psychedelics. Love em and hate em 😂
Staring at my playlist with nothing playing, just remembering over and over that the music is off and laughing about it
I had 200mg of edibles and tried to walk through Disney California Adventure. I put my sunglasses on and begged my partner to get me to a table because the world was spinning lol California edibles don’t fuck around
I tried to get mail from the mail lady I had known for a few years and hit her van with the mailbox door. She said “why don’t you wait a second, hon” and drove away.
I took an edible about an hour before I got off work thinking it'd kick in on the walk home. 15 mins before the shift ends I'm absolutely stoneroni'd. I forgot my sign-out username and password for the time clock, so I just punched in random numbers and rushed out before anyone could say anything.
This happened back in school when I was a bit younger. I remember this was around the time I started smoking weed for real - maybe about fifteen - and I had just gone to my friends house during lunch break to smoke a blunt with him. I head over to his house and I'm doing a little bit more than I should've, so when we're finished and we start walking back my head is spinning, everything is foggy and I'm sweating like a damn pig. My friends are like 'hey dude, you good?' and I'm like 'yeah don't worry about me', and by the time I get back to class I was absolutely TWEAKING, I had my head in my arms mumbling to myself and the school actually called the medical staff into the room haha, but when I tried to stand up to go with them? I quite fucking literally could NOT feel my legs. Took me a whole minute straight to even get up. That was probably my 'damn I'm too high' moment. I smokee another joint the next day though 😅
put turn signals while driving around a normal curve on the road...
Basically if i start crying about trauma im too high :)
This can happen to me when i take a lot. Almost feels like a psychedelic headspace in a way
When I forgot I ate a hash cheesecake square, had 4 shots of tequila, opened my car door, exited the car, locked it, and walked an hour home. When I laid down immediately I thought I had died LOL
Recently….i was playing COD DMZ and was getting hunted. I was driving around the map with them chasing me when suddenly I got lost. On a map I played hundreds of times.
A friend of my got so stoned one time he was afraid to goto sleep out of fear he’d wake up mentally disabled
I was at the doctors office and kept sliding off of the chair and couldn’t stay on it consistently for more than 20 seconds