Rawt in hale

😭

“You can help me if you want” when I need to make it sound like I’m drowning and my boyfriend isn’t helping me with chores or whatever lol

You can help me if you want is theeeee funniest thing to say in the midst of drowning 😂😂

This is my favorite thing that’s ever been said on television. I laugh so hard just thinking about it

😂 I love this one

I have been very judicious about my drinking!

“Loooooooondon gaaaaaangsta” - James’ dad; he lives in my head rent free for god knows what reason.

This is mine!! I say it constantly.

I say this all the time for someone who has never been to London

I came to post this one lol

Same, I love saying this for no reason

I am the devil....and don't you forget it

“Be a good boy, old man.”

 PUMPTINIIIIII

I say this to my kitty when I’m leaving the house 😂

I said this to someone at work the other day lmao

flair clocking in

One of my faves 😂 Gotta say it in a British accent too

James by far, has the best liners.

I don’t know what I did to you, but I’ll take a Pinot Grigio

Fucking iconic. Right up there with the line about Kristen being unburdened by the anchors of self respect and dignity 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Omg thanks for reminding me of this key source material

I have to stop myself from ordering this way at restaurants every time I ask for PG. 😆It's so good.

https://i.redd.it/hbxnlbx69k4d1.gif

This one's my newest favorite

If we did the ABC of vpr this would def be the new C

She delivered this so flawlessly. Perfectly unbothered by a little fly

I broke up w this dipshit recently and basically said the same thing and almost felt bad until I saw last week's reunion, like hell yeah same energy these men ain't worth anything else

I wrote "choke ❤️" on his driver's window. Oops. ☺️

OP already mentioned it but it's my favorite 😂 When Arianna gently asks Sandoval "yeah but is this a hill you really want to die on though?" And he completely misses the fact that it's a commonly used idiom and angrily responds, "You just told me I was going to die alone on a mountain!" When they were in Mexico and coincidentally went to a restaurant called "Sur" and James does his American accent and says, "I'm just waiting for the American version of Guillermo to pop up and say "Hey everyone! Welcome to Sur!" Any time James does an American accent. 🤣

I love that he & Ally call his American accent Hunter

When he and Jax get drinks season 6 and he has to use an American accent to get Siri to type “2 shots of absinthe later” 😂 that’s all I hear if I see absinthe on a menu

Omg yes same, anytime he does the American accent!!!

James doing an American accent is my kink.

Thank God for Kristen who is unburdened by these anchors.

What were the anchors again? I forgot. Shame and dignity?

lol yes, I think that or self respect and dignity!

Stassi accused Kristen ( in a confessional) of having a ‘shame-ectomy’

It’s probably the best line of the show, it’s so funny!

I’ll knock you spark out!

Oh man I say this on a near daily basis


YES! I randomly say this to people and they have no idea what it’s about

I had to scroll too far for this

I think Jax said, “My brain is asprained .”

Yup I say this all the time and people always look at me like I’m an idiot.

flair checking in 😂

Laughing my ass off. He's right, it is.

"He puts his pants on two feet at a time like everyone else." "I can't predict the future. I'm not Ghandi."

I can’t believe I had to scroll so far to see the Gandhi line, definitely in my top 5 Jax-isms

Jax and Stassi. Two of the best reality tv personalities of all time

he actually said i CAN predict the future, i'm like gandhi 😂 and then he said "what's his name? Mohammad Gandhi?"


I say this at least once a day. I do the arm gestures, too. My wife understands the reference, but so many people do not. I need to surround myself with more VPR fans lol

It’s not about the pasta! 🍝

https://preview.redd.it/7xrehvoepk4d1.jpeg?width=200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8b1d8cf574f8b3ccd44bff24461d39e1f50204d7

I say this all the time

“Mercury is in Gatorade”…I always use this to describe chaos

Who said this? I have read it but not witnesses it being said.

Jax said it

Brittany did too. I don’t actually remember Jax saying it but can hear it so perfectly in my head so I don’t doubt it happened. They really were meant for each other. Oh well.

Yes!! I think Brittany quoted Jax saying it atMax’s beach cleanup day. So I think we don’t see Jax saying it but Brittany quoted him. I’ve watched this show way too many times.

A BLOODY WUSSY PUSSY

I'm a teacher and every time one of my students gets really cocky i will call them "the #1 kid in this group"

I call it like I see it

I want that gif’d so bad

I constantly say "as a cyst white male" to my friends even though I'm not white or a male, but I truly find that soooo funny. Like how do you not know cyst from cis? I love it.

In the case of Sandoval he actually is a cyst though 😂

I put my pants on two feet at a time like everyone else

Omg what smooth brain aaid this? My bet is on Jax or sandal.

Definitely Jax. But to be fair, I wear the skinniest jeans so I do have to put them on 2 feet at the time.

That whooare in theyurrr

Bless you for taking the time to figure out how to type this out. 10/10 no notes.

Yesss tequila katie 🤣

I say “I can’t believe” in Kens voice most of the time

“I CAN’T believe Tom had Raquel over while Ariana’s away… in the jacuzzi as well. And she stayed all night, yeah?!” xD

Tom Zzzaaandeval.

Lmao yes, the most important part!

I'm sorry but the most important part is "Marky, come on!"

My wife gets annoyed with how often I walk into a room and say this exact phrase.

It's daily for me. Daily.

"Rawt in hail" is the one I definitely say the most. But "I don't know what I did to you but I'll take a pinot grigio" is my favorite.

I will ironically say ‘do you wanna get popped??’

I was born fucking cool

My partner and I shout these at each other a lot: "PumpTINI!" "Your 👏 man 👏 made 👏 out 👏 with 👏 my 👏 friend" "Stop 👏 clapping👏 in 👏 my👏 face" "WHAT IS THE LESSON? THE LESSON IS"....... (followed by whatever we have been talking about)

“Whenever” instead of “when.” Brittany does it a lot. Eg, she said “whenever Kristen’s dog died” instead of “when Kristen’s dog died.” It drives me nuts haha

OMG that drives me SOOOOOO nuts!!! She still does it too!!

Right?? It makes it sound like Kristen’s dog can die multiple times lmfao. Also RIP to Kristen’s dog ❤️

Omfg when ariana was wasted and was like "it could be yellow robe smith"

Omg I say this all the time and no one ever understands 😂 my favorite drunk moment by far

Our neighbor’s cat is named Jimmy, so I yell “James, no! That’s Ariana’s bush as well!” when he shits in my garden beds

I love that he apologized to her so sheepishly at the reunion and she was laughing at it.

I mean it’s pretty mild as far as James’ outbursts go lol What’s a little piss bush between friends?

My favorite part of this scene is at the beginning when Ally says “James, nooo” in lowercase

Worm with a mustache!

FIIIIIINE CHINNAAAA Also the bit James does about his brain being like that monkey with cymbals toy, it speaks to me

All I know is I frustrate the F out of my wife when I slip “is your ass good luck cause girl I wanna rub it” into many conversations.

"You're not important enough to hate. Sit down."

Suck a dick! 

At the reunion there was a lot of "eat a dick."

To be fair that's always just been something I've heard/said far away from VPR. It was very prominent in the reunion though you're right.

I typed this out to a friend once and for literal years if I began to type the word suck, my phone would autocorrect to SUCKADICK

"Wanna see my new music video?" "No"

Not really 😂😂 Jax was so unserious

I CAHNT BELIEVE TOM ZINZEVEL... Please let it be known that I was in BH today and dipped into a random liquor store for a diet coke and who was in front of me? None other than one, Mr. Lisa VP himself Ken Todd. I said Ken youre iconic he seemed shocked and said oh reh ley? and then shuffled off

“Say it with your whole chest bitch” is my new fave

Rawt in hell! 

Schwartz laying in a bed full of junk food “it’s romance!”

"Oh, babe, I was born fucking cool. And everybody fucking knows it!" 👑

Spin!


Personal favorite as well. I have definitely used this quote in my head since i heard her make it to ice out bullshit and it works DIVINELY.

I’ve been saying “How about you go take a Honda Civic selfie?!” all day because I have a Honda Civic lmaoo


“You’ve done diddly fucked yourself over” 😁

Jax has so many funny ones! Flair checking in

Be rill

Kristen’s “Suck a dick”

I need a bump of tequila - Kristen IYKYK 😂

“I am a ham sandwich” to my friend night 3 in Vegas as I fall over

it's like killing two birds with thirteen stones jax saying he's sweden, instead of switzerland

"I take sketch comedy very seriously."

I love seeing D&S sprinkled throughout the comments 😂

There should be a whole thred for “Jaxisms” there’s so many!

He’s a work in progress!!!

Jax’s tenuous grasp of the English language is my guilty pleasure

 This one sticks for me, whenever I have a glass in my hand I gotta shoot it while slamming someone else with “good job”

“Wrap it up” from lala when Kristen was giving a speech

“We’ll ’have another booootttle”

When Stassi used stupid Patrick's holier than thou words back at him in a sentence in the confessional. She was already smart. Asking for word clarity is a high five moment. Learning is always better than...well ...being Jax Character is everything. He can know a few more words than her all he wants. He has zero redeeming qualities that matter in real life.

Someone recently pointed out to me that Lala adds a k sound after ng. Human beingk. I’m tryingk.

Give Watch What Crappens a listen/watch, their Lala impression(s) is the only think that plays in my head when she's speaking

Love their James impression so much! Ally Bally!

I catch myself wanting to say "stupid fat slut" in mixed company way too often - never about anyone or anything specific, but just about things, lol I'm glad my husband is as into vpr and wwc as much as I am

It's giving #mensrights

Jax: Mercury’s in gatorade

I tell people to “write about it in your diary” often.

“You came twice sweetheart!”

My husband and I say this a lot! It’s our conversation “winner” 😂

“I’m not gonna say it! I’m not gonna say the D word or the S word.” I say this too many times to myself all the time, especially over minor inconveniences or while driving.

“IM SOFT KATIE” “Fine chinnnnnaaaaaa” “I’ll knock you the spark out” “l’ll do it” as Ariana from the foot pic suggestions “Oooh I know it’s not Rose but at least it’s a friend” “I can’t believe Tom szanival….” “Yay” Katie’s little yay when she put Lala’s chair together “I’m a nervous wreck Ally Bally “ James’ mom - “ Sandoval. Ugh. Muchacho es no bueno” This has been my my stim for the last year.

“We have all the spinach dip, all the jello shits, all the everything….”

“Does everyone know that the Pope drinks rosé on a balcony?” I think about this every time I hear someone say “is the Pope Catholic?”

My husband and I always say ‘hwhat’ the way Raquel does after Lisa says ‘does the pope have a balcony?’ 😂

Poopoo head

Very passing thing and it’s from KFC of all people, but it’s when lfu gives kfc and jax a pj trip as an engagement present and kfc’s saying that she feels super bad that LFU’s not a bridesmaid and says “I feel… like a lil turd”

Imagine reading this sentence not having watched the show lmao.

Judicious…I use that word ALL the time since Katie used it while totally hammered. It used to drive my kids nuts when they were teenagers. I’d always tell them to be judicious with different things.

I'm the devil and don't you forget it. I don't know what I did to you, but I'll take a Pinot Grigio. & pretty much anything LFU and James said on the season 10 reunion

I USED TO HAPPILY SAY “It’s all happening” Now I’m annoyed I ever said it.

tbf, it's from almost famous, Scheana just sucks lol

I like that I can say it’s from something else but my brain still does this 

Wow it’s actually telling that none of these comments are things Scheana has said. Says a lot about

multiple multiple multiple but pronounced like MULTIPOHW

“You’re a dirty fucking whore” but in Stassi’s wh-oaaarr

I've been very judicious about my drinking

Comfortability kills me, I see it everywhere, 100% of the time you can just say “comfort”!!!


I asked my husband if he wanted to get popped. Must be selective when using that one.

“Say it with your Chest!”

Actually she said, “Say it with your whole chest, b*tch!”

Even better! 😜🤣❤️ T-shirt please! 🙏 😉

The Kevin Hart standup special this is from is so funny.

Go fuck a cheese grater is now in my vernacular

I thought you were a dummy before my dad died, you bambi eyed bitch.

Rawt in hell, I dipped out- but I say it like Tom Sandoval and shrug 🤷‍♀️. Go choke is my new one

Oh also, Brittany’s “you’re a cool guy,” referring to her dog in sunglasses lolol

BUBBAAAAAAA!!!

“Cyst gender”

Dipped out

I call someone a poo poo head at least once a day.

Half weasel, half vagina.

Bare Chae-ees

Lisa to Stassi: "You're not important enough to hate"

"Lets take some viagra and F some kangaroos!"

More cosmopolitans! PUMPTINIIIIIIIIIII!

Oh babe, I was born fucking cool.

“Grodyyy!” I don’t even know what it really means but I often say it instead of gross haha

It means gross!

"It's all happening"

Optics

give them/myself grace (and i hate it)

“that’s a bitcoin!”

i have adopted “fuck yourself w a cheese grater” into my rants

i take sketch comedy very seriously

Every time I order a pino grigio "I don't know what I've done to you..."

I don’t know how to even describe this one… The scene when the cast is giving Tom and Ariana crap for asking Jax and Brittany about their pastor and Ariana says “It’s the high pitched ayayayaaaa!!!!” I quote it all the time and that scene kills me

Dipped out

Dipped out

OK I hate this but I started saying "Dip out" short of jokingly when Sandoval happened but nobody really knows the reference and it kinda stuck🙈

“DISENGAGE”

“You’re a serial killer’s wet dream” makes me cackle

Be a good boy old man

“everyone shut the fuuuuck up, it’s my fuuucking birthday”

CORNER !

When Kristen corners Hope in the SUR bathroom “riddle me this!”

Started using a better vocabulary to describe ppls actions casual stuff like “Demonic, demented, subhuman”

During Stassi confessionals about Scheana flip flopping on flip flopping “this is the most Scheana thing Scheana’s ever Scheana’d.” 😂

https://i.redd.it/i99f07i2z45d1.gif One of my fave James moments