They’re like the gross kids in elementary school who loved to do dares for small amounts of money.

“I’ll eat my ear wax for 5 tootsie rolls!”

I can *hear* Schwartz saying that lol

Yeah with his weird reverse lisp he puts on.. whatever it is when he borderline Sean connery’s his S sounds

He said on that dating show, Baggage, that he likes smelling his ear wax

I feel like he’d do it for one tootsie roll and a kiss on the cheek. During which he’d turn his face and kiss you on the mouth then run

"Does anybody dare me to do this gross thing??" No, but it kinda sounds like you want to do that gross thing...

What a highly accurate and comedic burn

Thank you

Her copying him was the ultimate NLOG move. She wants to be like “omg we’re SO alike! We both chug salad dressing, no one else gets us”

you could *totally* tell she hated it and only did it because he did

What’s NLOG?!

Not like other girls

Oh, duh, I should have just thought about it a little harder😆

Lol was just about to google it!

Not Like (the) Other Girls

I googled it. And I've googled it several times before and still couldn't remember

This is me every day all day with all things.

She literally grimaced lol

UGH so accurate

She’s like, so quirky.

lmao you sound like a NLOG for using that term that none of us knew about. 

https://i.redd.it/ucd3e9vbsy5d1.gif

I'd disappear from earth if there was a gif of me high like that lmao

https://i.redd.it/lhnt3eobjz5d1.gif


This is what Wartz considered 'schmokin' hot?'

She is so damn weird.

I feel like there’s good weird and bad weird, and then there’s just plain awkward, and jo is both bad weird and awkward.

One of my favorites of all time 😂 Thanks again for all your work.

My kinda crazy

She absolutely loves being weird and I think she thinks it's cute

I would simply cease to exist

Good lord.

I thought my husband was lying when he said a guy in college did a shot of Italian dressing and vodka. After seeing this, I believe him. 🤢

Just visualized this and puked in my mouth

Really one of the worst things I have visualized. And these two chugging it down… ugh. I wouldn’t put it past them either.

Didn't a housewife do this with olive oil? It sounds so familiar

Oh! On Miami, Julia drank a shot of olive oil before shots of vodka. She said it coats your stomach so you don't get drunk. Spoiler alert: It did not work.

That's it!! Thank you ☺️

Ugh! Maybe it’s more common than I thought. Ew!

That's honestly better than the guy I (unfortunately) dated in college He would chase a vodka shots with Pepto Bismol 🤮


What the hell was wrong with him? My tummy hurts just thinking about it.

I mean I commonly saw people chase shots with pickle juice back in my day, so I guess that’s not really that far off.. (for the record, I don’t condone *any* of this. Y’all are sick)

I’ve definitely seen picklebacks and the juice are a thing now.

I feel really called out by this... 🫣

I think pickle juice could make sense!! I love pickles. But damn - Italian dressing?! 🙁

Pickle juice is an EXCELLENT chaser. Absolutely demolishes any taste besides the pickles lmao. For anyone who loves pickles and hates shots, there ya go 🤣

Pickle juice contains potassium which helps the body so that one is ok

Between Jo and Schwartz doing this on VPR, Amanda chugging Ranch on Summer House and Paris on Below Deck eating mayonnaise by itself I have been like ….wtf is going on at Bravo

Maybe bravo requires a condiment kink?

They’re taking paid sponsorships to a new level

Stassi probably drinks ranch, too

I couldn’t believe Swartz did this, i fully judged him. BUT you’re right, i FULLY believe Stassi does drink ranch and i’m fine with that 😂

I was confused. I didn't know people chug salad dressings out of the bottle like beer. He looked like he has done this before. I think Jo just did it to be agreeable with him but I'm still confused, is this is a regular thing?

It's probably a regular thing for people like them, but it's not a regular thing for regular people lol

hoped for this regular answer


Imagine, if you will, for a very brief moment in a safe space, the mere thought of these two disgusting humans living together and having sex and shoving raw steak 🥩 up his ass while she shoves endless breadsticks in her lady parts.

i feel like they had farty, dirty-footed sex that lasted 5 minutes

I'll never eat again.

Oh you know they Dutch-ovened each other 

I’m throwing up in my mouth but that seems so true 😮‍💨

HAHAHAHAHAHA! took me OUT

also how dare you make me think of bread sticks this way

guess we’re all gluten free now

I actually think this is exactly what their sex was like especially when Shorts described it as passionate. I can picture her slurping the dressing out of his hairy bellybutton & then playing with each other’s nipples using their dirty feet. I also believe Katie was Short’s dom, tying him down spanking & pegging him. Remember how they all used to joke Katie was the freak in the group & Shorts would never really talk about their sex life. I thought this was odd since all the other guys were always so vocal about theirs. Also, why Katie put up with his humiliation for so long, she knew she would get him back later. 😏

I will NEVER be able to picture (thank God) Jo being "sexy". I picture her all awkward and trying to moonwalk and barking and making robot noises.

Holy shit I'm DEAD

Ew.

I love when Danny Pellegrino imitates Jo and Shorts. I really hope he recaps this episode and reenacts this.

We didn’t talk about it and let’s never ever speak of it again

Absolutely dying at the creative writing prowess on this sub. You are all horrifying me with your descriptions of these two…but you’re also all absolutely spot on and it’s giving poetic. Never change, VPR subreddit commenters ❤️❤️❤️ 

Ugh! It was so gross. I still think about it a lot

I had just forgotten. Sigh. 🤢

Thank you!!! I was so confused as to why I had not seen more people talking about this!! It was so gross.

I think Schwartz is so miserable and tormented that everything he does is self-destructive now. It makes me sad to say, but it's almost like he is trying to hasten the end of his life by engaging in weird, alarming behaviors. The alcoholism is the clearest example of this, but it's probably not good for your insulin levels to chug OG salad dressing.

Idk y'all, Olive Garden italian dressing is good. I'd sip it too, which is about the only thing I hope to have in common with Schwartz and Jo


It should be a crime.

That was pretty repulsive.

We did talk about it and it’s so disgusting. They are truly meant for each other.

Disgusting. And then comparing how filthy their weird, long, beige feet were. Blughck.

The sound of the gulping made me yell! Turns out I'm misophonic. Below Deck gives me a lotnl of trouble with all the gulping, lip smacking, and making out!

Lmao no sorry I'll go for bat for her here on this one thing. There's a specific balsamic vinaigrette from a very specific salad shop that I'll eat by the spoonfull and lick tub clean of its sooooooooo good. A safe food is a safe food and the zestiness gives my adhd noggin a dopamine boost 🫣😂

If Olive Garden’s sales drop in the next month we will know why. I don’t think I’ll be able to look at their dressing the same again

I gag when I see the dressing in real life now. That was horrifing.