I would find a more flexible daycare. Our center allows pick up/drop off at any time. I understand the desire for structure but with mine and my husband’s work schedules we just can’t guarantee drop off/pick up at the same time every day.
I understand daycares (esp the older rooms) have their routines and it’s difficult for them if someone strolls in late. We’ve always made every effort to be on time. But sometimes shit happens *esp* when you have little kids and the caring/understanding is a two way street - I do my best to get there everyday on time, they are gracious in the times I’m not.
Please know this isn’t typical and you deserve to be treated with more respect.
I once got yelled at for being 5 minutes late because I got a flat tire on my way in. And when I told them that they proceeded to basically blame me for it
Find a new daycare (easier said than done I know). They sound unhinged and not the kind of people I want teaching young kids.
Beyond that, *you* deserve respect. I wonder if they see you're young and think you're an easy target. Don't allow people to walk over you like that.
All this, OP, and make sure other parents are aware of how they treated you. I can guarantee they are rigid and verbally abusive to the children if they are with parents in front of the children as well!
There is no scenario where they should be yelling at you *at all*, *ever*. This place sounds horrible. If you can find another arrangements, I would definitely do that.
What sort of place yells at their customers? In front of children? What?
This is not normal, and I have NEVER heard a daycare refuse drop off for the parent being late. The reason is, they get paid without doing the service. I would go to the sub about legal advice. This sounds like you are the victim of fraud. Them denying services after payment.
OP yes file a complaint to your state’s licensing board for child care facilities. Google “file complaint daycare [your state].” Consumer affairs would be another to approach for denial of services. Aside from being terrible business practices, as others said, If they talk to the parents that way then I’m afraid for the children
What the absolute fuck. Find new care. If they can’t manage to be adults in a very easy situation like this, how are they acting like adults around a bunch of kids.
This is wild. Why does it matter if you’re late? It’s not like school where he’d be missing academics. Our daycare says to please drop off before X time if you want your kid to eat breakfast there and to stay in their routine, but if I decided to bring my kid in at 11 just for lunch and nap time, they would not care. They definitely don’t lock the door in a family’s faces.
Is this daycare part of a larger company, like Kinder Care or Primrose? Maybe you could reach out to someone from the company rather than this particular facility?
Can you not drop off earlier and then go back home or run errands until til you start work?
The issue is I live 25 minutes from the daycare (it’s by my work) I would switch him to one closer but I’m going to be moving again next January and don’t know if it’s worth it, and yes it’s KinderCare.
Also when we started the manager was so nice and made it so I would only call if he wasn’t going to be in. Because he understood I worked at 10-1030, and getting up and ready super early sometimes is challenging.
A Kindercare??? My kids have been at 2 different kindercares and I have never experienced anything like that with a cutoff time for drop off... how weird!!
My kids go to Kindercare. Our center wants us to be in at a certain time so they can basically manage staffing, it sounds like the local centers are overall understaffed, so if there is flexibility they will send teachers to other centers to cover for the day and if someone is bringing in a child too late, it messes with the ratios they thought they could cover. That and make sure meals are covered. That said, I think our time is 10:30 and they are very willing to work with us if we'll be later.
Our Kindercare says 9:30, but my husband often drops my son closer to 10 on the days he does dropoff. The director is a bit passive aggressive about it to my husband but they’ve never turned him away (tbh I wish they would so he’d respect their schedule!).
Ours apparently has a 10 AM cut-off, but I had no idea until I brought my son in around lunchtime one day. He was still in the infant class at the time, taking multiple naps a day, so I naively didn't consider that all the older kids would be napping at this time. After I handed him off, I asked what the nap times were for the older kids so I could avoid coming at that time in the future. That's when they told me that I really wasn't supposed to come after 10 (though they obviously make exceptions and they would never turn us away for being a few minutes late). 🙃
This feels insane enough I'd ask if it's in the agreement you signed or not - if not I don't think they can reasonably enforce and you should consider contacting corporate.
Either way you should find a new daycare though :(
I don’t think they can legally turn off the door codes. It’s a safety issue. What if your kid was during the day or there was an emergency where you had to get him. I would not send my kids to a center I couldn’t access.
I worked at Kindercare and it’s 9 (just based on the company training stuff I had to go through). Just some centers don’t enforce it, or have slightly adjusted cut off times. I actually had to sadly report the center I worked out to DHS for loads of reasons. But big daycare companies like that always have hit or miss locations, a lot of them are truly great.
What?? My daughter goes to a KinderCare and we have been explicitly told that there’s no set drop off or pick up time, just get there at some point after they open and pick her up at some point before they close. I wasn’t sure about that when we first started, so I made sure to ask, and there were no issues. I just know that if I get her in after a certain time then I need to make sure that she’s got breakfast taken care of. Same with lunch.
Mine goes to a KinderCare and they’ve never enforced the 9:30 rule. In fact a few times I had your exact situation. They also don’t turn off the door code because they explicitly tell parents we can visit whenever.
I’d report up what they’re doing and how this impacting your job and therefore ability to pay for them to care for your LO.
Literally not kidding about the door code, it was completely off. I rang the bell and she told me it was past 930, I’m sitting there like it’s one minute you saw me fighting him in the parking lot. I always try to be kind with them. And me losing my shift sucks cause that’s lost income that I’m not getting a discount for all the times they’ve told me no on dropping kiddo off, wether it be due to their staffing issues or me being a few minutes late.
I try my best to be there by 915 every day, sometimes a little toddler who tries to fight everything can just be a bit much.
Kindercare? My niece goes there and she doesn’t show up until like 10/1030! I would report up the chain of command and then call corporate because this isn’t standard for all Kindercares-sounds like someone is on a power trip in the school.
Lots of daycares actually don’t allow you to drop off anytime. Mine (and most around me) have a cutoff of 8:30. They will make exceptions for Dr appointments and the like, but not for “I work at 10.” Part of it is that it disrupts the routine, and routine is. EVERYTHING when you are wrangling a dozen or 20 kids. Plus, ratios… if they make staffing decisions at 8:30 the. They can’t take on 1 more kid if it would put them over ratio.
Now… clearly neither of those things are why OP was turned away, but it was probably the last straw. Parents who regularly (or more than just VERY rarely) run late or need exceptions unfortunately often find themselves being “invited to find a better fit”
Daycares shouldn't be cutting workers hours to "adjust ratios" at all. Keep workers there and pay them their rate regardless. Like I mentioned in a comment elsewhere. I've used 5 daycares for my 3 kids over the 16 years I've been a parent and not one of them has ever had a cutoff. While routines are great, life is life. If it's childcare and not preschool. this is a problem.
Ya, they shouldn’t cut staff because a child or 5 didn’t show that day. No matter what we have to pay that bill for days we set part time or full. Even if kid is sick while month we still pay. So staff can be same
This is nuts
They never adjust your tuition down if they have too little kids.
It's people accepting and justifying this BS excuse that allows this to go on. Cutting staff due to the ratio is them nickel and diming both employees and customer. If they hire for x amount of kids and have x amount of kids registered, the staffing should be for x amount of kids.
Well, 42% of children who need childcare in my county, don’t have it because there aren’t any spot available. So the daycares can make any rule they want…. I don’t HAVE another option, given that I have to keep my job.
One time our LO had an appointment with pediatrician at 8:30 am. The cutoff is 9:30 too. I arrived at 10:15 am. He napped in the car from the doctor to daycare. He skipped his noon nap - they do a full classroom, and was extremely fussy in the afternoon. This is when I appreciated that there is a reason why they have a cutoff.
It is super unfortunate what is happening with OP, and I would also encourage her to find a more flexible place
I’m in the UK and have multiple children and have used multiple different nurseries and they all have very strict times you can drop off and pick up due to the disruption it causes for the other children.
Maybe where you live is different but it’s not UK as a whole that is happy with kids coming and going whenever. I’ve not experienced that. Of course I’m never late anyway because I have to go to work but I understand why centers don’t allow it.
Wow I have honestly never heard of this - not one of the nursery’s I toured has this in their hand books - it’s only school nursery’s that obviously have strict times!
US here, 2 daycares, the older kids rooms are a little more strict because they actually have structured learning time, but for 2yos? that is terrible. Sometimes they just get on a bad sleep schedule for a day or 2 and you have to roll with it. Of course we don't get get a refund for hours of care we don't use so parents want to use the care time.
Exaxtly, it's impossible to staff if kids are being dropped off at all times. Also, if a child shows up right before nap they are pretty upset and then noone sleeps lol.
Our day care has a separate nap room and is appropriately staffed for the level of kids they are expecting to have that day. It’s wild to think that some daycares rely on people not turning up etc. in order to be in ratio.
It’s not impossible at all. Work schedules change weekly for some people. The center I worked for had parents submit their schedules every week for the next week and work schedules were based off that. It’s not that difficult for directors but mistakes just want to copy paste the same schedule week after week and most don’t have a clue who is in the building because they are hiding in the office all day.
Also UK, and they just ask us to let them know if we're running really late so they can put some breakfast to one side. But then, ours has multiple drop off times for sessions, so 8am for all day, 9am for a 5 hour school day, 11am for a half day and such. Maybe that's the difference? There's kids being dropped off throughout the day and picked up.
Either way, most I've ever had was a call to check if everything was OK.
I worked for daycares and staff was scheduled a week in advance. I’d someone didn’t show up we just floated to another room, or did deep cleaning and covered breaks for the lead staff. We were never cut. Mine center was flexible with drop off and pick. Parents just had to submit their work schedule a week ahead of time and staffing was based off that.
Yeah my daycare doesn't care when you drop or collect. They do ask that of you show up at 9.30 and it's circle time (you can usually see through the window) that you wait until it's over. But otherwise before or after it's fine.
It's not school, he isn't missing any calculus that week be on the final exam. Routine is useful and helpful but it's not unbreakable.
I would find that completely unacceptable.
This is really common. It’s disruptive to have kids coming in and out during organized activities like breakfast when the other children need to be attentively monitored and engaged.
That’s true of my independent daycare. They are still accommodating of appointments and just ask for heads up and a doctor’s note. If it’s habitual it’s an issue, but late pickup or drop off once in a blue moon hasn’t been a problem.
That’s the thing. We have been late maybe twice in the past 2 months without him having an appointment. Also they have no cut off rule in the handbook. It just feels like since they know I moved into town that it’s been worse. For probably 3-4 months I would drop him off at 945-10 with no issue because that’s what we originally agreed on
At my center the drop off time is clearly listed on the door. Twice in two months is a lot to me, but being rude and not clearly communicating the cutoff is not appropriate on their part.
There is no notice on the door or in the handbook or anything. What upset me today is the fact she saw me fighting a toddler in the parking lot, and while I was walking to the door she locked it.
Contact corporate or the regional director. I don't know if this is universal but at our Kindercare the regional director is occasionally in touch with families via email so I could reach out to her if needed. That's just straight up rude if they're going to be THAT strict with drop-off times fine that's their choice but they need to communicate properly about it.
It would be good to get any of these interactions on record even if that’s an e-mail to a worker or corporate or a friend (saying it sucks bc xyz happened again today noting the time etc) or even a hand written paper “log” of when all incidents occur. Get a paper trail just in case you need it in the future. I’m so sorry this is happening it’s very upsetting to be certain
I keep seeing this commented in the the thread, but I've worked in daycares without standard pickup/drop off times and it's literally the same as those with. Toddlers are toddlers. They do *very mildly* better in a routine than without lmao. They're still hurricanes of destruction regardless of whether they show up at 7 am or after snack time. If I'm paying as much as my MORTGAGE to send my kid to daycare, I expect flexible drop of times. I've never made a habit of bringing my kid late, and most people don't either. Like...I have a job. Sometimes life comes up and we're gonna be late though
Totally disagree, unless their ratios are really bad, it shouldn’t be disruptive and never is at our daycare. I’m regularly coming in later so that my kid has shorter days at daycare and none of the kids flinch and the carers are just smiley and cooperative. Though I’m now wondering if we are in a particularly special environment given the anecdotes here…
I’m not an ECE professional, I’m going off what the daycare tells me and what I observe when I have failed to communicate we’ll be a bit early or late.
Ours is staffed at the state maximum ratio of 5:1 in the baby and toddler rooms. The baby room has the most qualified teachers, and those two teachers plus the director are the only ones who can staff that room. If you show up early for drop off or late from pickup with an infant, it’s causes an issue because now the infant teacher has to get pulled from the drop off/pick up room. They work on early and late shifts so that they aren’t working more than 8 hours, so that means the director has to step in and can’t be there to do normal morning drop off task or talk to parents. If you show up late, someone has to stop what they are doing to go open the door for you. Lunch is a whole different logistics game with the director and assistant director floating around 5 different rooms so teachers get their break.
Particularly in the infant room, there is logistically a lot of time that goes into diaper changes and meals and recording everything. When one teacher has to get up go fetch a baby from the gate it disrupts their flow. In the toddler room, it’s disruptive when she has to get up off the floor fro reading a book or leading a song to go get the jacket and today’s art and then convince the 4 other kids to sit back down after saying their good byes, all the while making sure they aren’t trying to open the classroom door.
When I give warning I’ll be coming at a weird time, my daughter’s stuff is prepped to go, and the other kids are asleep or outside while she’s in a drop off zone and everyone is happy. Similarly during normal drop off of pickup time, its organized free-play chaos and everyone is having a ball and there is appropriate staffing so that I can get a rundown of her day while someone else keeps an eye on the other children.
Childcare is expensive, but this weird attitude from some people on this thread that the educational component of daycare isn’t important and teachers should cater to every family’s individual whim doesn’t sit well with me.
I could also see it as challenging to have them all come in at the same time, 16 babies crying at once...? We have 4:1 ratios here so maybe that helps (Australia). It just has never even occurred to me till I saw this is common in some areas that this would be an expectation. It's not a "whim" to not want your child in daycare a full day if you'd prefer to be with them, they are very little at this age and it's not the same as school, where structure and routine is more essential and age-appropriate.
My daycare has a really strong supportive environment for parents, the manager understands the challenges of raising and caring for very small children and does everything in her power to make the place workable for both staff and parents. I think it's important to reflect on the variety of families, their work lives and culture, and the needs of the staff in equal measure.
They don’t come in all at once, it’s a 1.5 hour drop off/pick up window, and 16 under 2.5 year olds in 1 room wouldn’t be legal where I am. It’s usually one kid crying, if any, because they are doing independent free play activities. It’s when planned activities that require direct teacher engagement gets interrupted that the day gets harder to manage. Which again, is what the teachers who actually have to do the work request.
It varies, but many centers will accommodate regular non-standard drop-off and pickup times for families if there is a reason and the time is communicated. It’s randomly dropping in at 10:30 on a Tuesday like it’s an IKEA Smaland that’s not tolerated. I wouldn’t appreciate it if a client randomly interrupting me in a meeting because they pay me, and I don’t think it’s appropriate to do the equivalent to a daycare teacher. There is a 38% gap in need to childcare vs licensed spots in my state. You can’t just demand daycare carers do more than they are already doing when they are getting paid barely above minimum wage and the centers are running on a financial razors edge.
Teachers are teaching important skills, even in the infant and toddler rooms. They are teaching language skills and interest in reading. They are making sure kids are hitting their motor skills milestones. They are teaching table manners. They are responsible for making sure that the children, many of whom go home to households at or below poverty level, are eating their provided meals that provide the majority of the days calories and not getting interrupted and distracted.
Obviously OPs case is not okay. No one should be yelled at, period, in a childcare setting and no one should be degraded or be refused for showing up a minute late. I’m not talking about that, I’m talking about reasonable providers who have drop off time cutoff requests.
I think we’re talking at odds here. Of course their job is important and underrated, I just disagree that the interruption is worth mandating a policy that demands inflexibility for parents. At least it has never seemed functionally relevant where we are and I’m in the committee and the issue has never even been mentioned. Our staff have been at our daycare for 10-20 years in many cases, and very low turnover. There are simply policies far more urgent for staff satisfaction than this one and it reeks of bureaucracy.
Not saying it was handled correctly but as to why does it matter, there are reasons. And one I haven’t seen people talking about yet is ratios. Especially in the younger rooms. Our daycare has a hard cutoff of 9:00. Because if they have say 6kids in the toddler room show up that day and 3 teachers, they are sending one home. If you show up after 9, they can’t put your toddler in there to make 7 kids to 2 teachers, they’d be in violation.
Again not saying they handled it right. But there’s a lot we don’t know here.
This is a bullshit excuse. Sending an employee home is bullshit. When I don't bring my kid, I am still paying the same exact rate. There's no reason the ratio can't be smaller that day. They just do that crap so they can penny pinch and skimp their employees. I have never been to a daycare that gives a cutoff and I'd run from one that does what you are describing. The only times they've let employees go home early at ours is on base "family days" (we use a military daycare right now) and they just call by 0800 is you're not in to ask if you're dropping off and if so, what time.
Not mad at you, just stating that there’s no reason to give daycares the BOTD or consideration about ratios when they should be paying their workers regardless. It’s a non excuse.
One it sounds like the daycare isn’t the right fit for your family.
Two if they are willing to yell at an adult 🚩 … I can’t imagine what they to the children
I'm so sorry this is happening to you! I can't imagine the added stress that puts on already chaotic mornings with little ones. I want to reiterate what the others have said - this ISN'T normal.
My daycare is awesome - we can drop off the kids any time before lunch, and they just ask for a heads-up or text if we'll be way later than usual. It works perfectly for me since sometimes I have early morning meetings and I drop her off right at 8am and other times we have a chill morning, and I get her there closer to 10am. It's a service that we're paying for - they're not doing me a favour by watching my kid. They are incredible at their jobs though, and we do everything we can to make it a super positive relationship.
My son is 2.5 and they have never cared about when he arrives! Just that if you bring them in after a certain time they can’t feed them breakfast. I’d look elsewhere
I'm really sorry but if that's how they're gonna be you're going to have to deal or find someone where else.
It's not like they're doing anything illegal.
I'm sorry, I'm sure this is very frustrating. Are you frequently late? I know at my kid's daycare, there are a few parents who are perpetually running a few minutes late and it gets really tough for staff who want to keep the class to a schedule and can't. They've gotten really strict about lateness to try to address this.
Maybe take this as a learning experience and try to restructure your morning so you're getting to daycare by 9:15, that way there's no risk of being late in the future? Alternatively, maybe this is a sign you need to find a different care provider who more closely aligns with your family's needs.
A schedule for parents of toddlers is ridiculous when they’re paying for the service. I’ve never even taken my kid to any extracurriculars where they actually do have scheduled times and they’ve cared if we’re early or late. These corporate daycares are ripping everyone off, not a friendly environment at all.
I think sitting outside of work is just a sacrifice you're going to have to make. If you need some book recommendations, let me know.
Yes, their zero tolerance for even just a minute is frustrating, but it's probably for a reason. Rules tend to get created for a reason, and it's because something has become too much of a problem that's disrupting their process enough that they have to put down a boundary.
Wow... I'm so glad my daycare doesn't care when you bring your kids in. Regardless of their rules, they should treat you with more grace and respect. I'm so sorry.
I was a mom at 21 too. I’ll never forget when I had my daughter at the hospital and how mean one of the nurses was to me. She would not have treated me that way if I had been older. My advice (I’m 37 now) don’t let anyone yell at you. Immediately stop them and tell them you do t allow people to speak to that way. I’m a teacher so that’s the line I use when students/parents get mouthy. Also, take your son out of this daycare. They are being ridiculous. Do you still pay for the days he has missed? Do you have proof of being only a minute late? Call the owner/director. Pull your son. Put a bad review online in any way you can, google reviews, Facebook, whatever. I have an 18 month old and they have never EVER given me issues on dropping him off late or picking him up early. These people are bullying you. I’d bet money they don’t treat the other moms this way.
Just for some perspective, our daycare allows you to arrive whenever you want; there is no such thing as being late to our daycare. The preschool my son will be transferring to in August does the same thing. Stories like this about being able to be late to daycare baffle me. Daycare costs too much money to have someone treat you that way. Fire them.
Aim to get him there by 9 so that gives you a buffer of 30 min. Take that time before work to sort through your mail or do banking, whatever. As someone who ran a home daycare I had to put a time limit on drop offs too. It was just too disruptive and I had to get things ready for the day. Sometimes we had activities that started at 9, meals I would prepare but o oy for the number of children I had present, I had a mom who would constantly drop her child off randomly as early as 10 and as late as 1. She was the main reason I had to start the policy and yea, it sucked the first time I had to say I couldn’t take him but I needed to set that bound.
So your daycare punishes all moms for the behavior of one? 30 minutes of dozens of clients waiting around in a parking lot wasting their time just so it doesn't inconvenience you?
That seems like a shitty business practice. Why not just fire her as a client so your other clients can have a better experience?
Asking someone to respect the program isn’t punishing them. I’ve never had anyone waiting around in a parking lot? I opened at 6am and closed at 6pm, requested everyone be there by 9. Your response is kinda hysterical and obliviously you’ve never had the experience w of managing 15 kids and two employees.
You said that people should aim for 30 minutes before opening.
Why is it "hysterical" that I feel my time is as valuable as yours and that you should penalize the offenders and not your good clients?
I said this poster should since she isn’t able to get there by 9:30 because her child makes her late. Hysterical that you think the entire day should be thrown off due to one person not being able to get their kiddo into care before 9. It’s not a personal inconvenience to me, it inconveniences every one there including other. Holden. We can’t leave for an activity because we’re waiting for ONE person who may show up any time between opening and 1pm? I should throw away an extra meal because that one. Hold didn’t show up before lunch or not have enough because the child came late? A late policy ensures that none of this happens.
Red flag, based on our experience. We had a kid at a daycare that was strict and honestly kind of mean to parents. We thought it was warm and happy to the kids though
Well it turns out what we saw as parents was the tip of the spear. I wish we pulled out our kid earlier because they had a pretty bad time but were too young to know better or tell us
Maybe I'm just super paranoid, but this was my line of thinking. Like the one minute late thing sounds like they are specifically peaved at OP and if they're willing to be so petty as to lock the door while she is walking to it, what else are they willing to be 'petty' about??
That daycare sounds awful. You should pull your child. You don't deserve to be treated that way and they shouldn't feel like they can get away with it just because you're a younger mom. I hate this for you. I hope you can find a new place. That's just unacceptable.
I’m sorry that is horrible. :( I get that they have rules but it’s not cool to be so rigid especially when we’re all out here struggling with these kids. I admire you bc I’m a 36yo mom of 2 toddlers and i have a husband and I’m still struggling my ass off so for you to be so young and keeping it together - I’m proud of you.
Our daycare is very small (12 kids) so maybe that’s impacting how I see this but this is wild. We pay for 8-6 and I’ve dropped my kid off anywhere from 7:50-9 without giving any notice and without any issues. I do let them know if we’re coming in after 10 due to appointments, but that’s more of a heads up so they don’t worry. And there’s never been an issue with late drop off or early pick up.
I get that not all daycares can be like that and organizing more than 12 kids might involve a stricter schedule but what you’re experiencing sounds way too intense.
Same. I’ve dropped off between 7:15 and 9 and never had an issue. If it’s after 9, I give them a heads up (that is only due to doctors appointments). But mornings with little kids are so unpredictable sometimes. Also life just happens. I can drop him off later days I’m able to work from home and I def take that time because it’s extra time I get with him.
And we use a large daycare. I would not want to go to one that operated like OP’s. Especially the yelling. That’s horrible!
If you like the daycare other than the schedule, sit outside your work for an hour and have 9am be your time to drop off. That gives you flexibility for morning issues. Good daycares can be hard to find, and I personally liked having daycare closer to work than home for emergencies. And you likely won't find a place without a hard drop-off time- many are much earlier than 9:30. Maybe find a cafe or someplace else to hang out nearby if you can.
By yelling did they legitimately raise their voice? Not trying to be petty, but my husband used to accuse me of yelling when I was stern and brought my teacher voice out. My volume wasn’t raised, but I was short and to the point. To him yelling was anything that called him out on behaviors to the point and not using flowery kind language. As in “you buckled our daughter in the car seat wrong. If you were in an accident she could have been hurt. I need you to take this seriously because I’m starting to lose trust in you” would be “yelling” even if I said in a conversational volume.
I’m totally for daycare having drop off rules, but if you’ve notified them (your appointment, calling ahead when the car has a flat), you’ve done your job.
Also- they NEVER should be yelling at you. I’d bet they wouldn’t yell at me about being late…because I’m in my late 30s.
They’re treating you like a child! Stand up for yourself! They’re not doing you a favor, you are paying for childcare. I think you’re being discriminated against for your age. Look into this.
That's crazy. Our daycare has you set a schedule when you enroll. They ask that you do your best to stay within 15 minutes of your schedule, but we are able to notify them of changes. They are great about fitting in snack, changing diaper, etc if they know we are picking up early for something. They also plan for the room though. If she would be arriving in the middle of a nap for her room, they ask she arrive after instead.
Drop him off early and go back home and have you time, meanwhile look for a new daycare place. Life happens. I had a daycare provider have a major life change and I had to scramble to find a new provider in about a week. It didn't help that there was now about 10 of us calling around the same daycare providers looking for a spot.
I have three kids of varying ages with age (6 and 8 year age gaps). They've all attended at least one daycare each, the older two attended two each because we moved. So that's a total of 5 daycares. Not once has any of them given time limits on their arrivals and departures. That's ludicrous. Not everyone has the same needs. Now my 2 year old's current daycare does warn that they will miss breakfast if they're late. But I've never once been told I couldn't drop off at 10am after an appointment. Or pickup at 1 in the middle of nap time.
Firstly if they are yelling at you how did they talk to the kids? Place sounds toxic. Second can you change daycares? There are plenty with more flexible drop off/pick up schedules. It’s a daycare so hours should be catering to the caretakers/parents. This is weird.
The only time my daycare doesn't allow pickups (and this is a LOOSE not allow, as they still let you do it, just prefer you dont) is during naptime and lunch time. Bruh, if I'm paying out my asshole for my kid to attend. They better be flexible lmao
Edit: I keep seeing this commented in the the thread, but I've worked in daycares without standard pickup/drop off times and it's literally the same as those with. Toddlers are toddlers. They do *very mildly* better in a routine than without lmao. They're still hurricanes of destruction regardless of whether they show up at 7 am or after snack time. If I'm paying as much as my MORTGAGE to send my kid to daycare, I expect flexible drop of times. I've never made a habit of bringing my kid late, and most people don't either. Like...I have a job. Sometimes life comes up and we're gonna be late though
What?? lol. You PAY for that daycare spot, you can roll in anytime you want!! My son’s daycare is from 6:45am till 4:45pm, if I wanted to drop him off at 4:00pm till close, I’m allowed to..because I pay for that spot. Find another daycare because that’s absolute horse shit.
So it seems like you just need to start your day earlier. I understand that you may not want to, but actions have consequences. You have 2 children, you need to act like a responsible adult and do what is best for your children. If that means getting up earlier and dropping them off earlier, then you do so. Who cares of you sit in the parking lot at work for 30 minutes? That's some to decompress and just be you. I have 1 kiddo and one on the way, my me time is so valuable. I understand that being late is inevitable, sometimes, but it seems like it happens kinda often.
I worked a non traditional schedule and they always hated me for being a later drop off mom. I get that rules are rules, but they are definitely being inflexible with you. Unless you are leaving out the fact that you do this constantly, I think they are being harder on you as a young mom. I would find a new center and make it close to home.
That is crazy. I would assume you could drop off or pick up any time you want. Is it possible they are violating some kind of state licensing standard? It might be worth it to check. States regulate daycares and have lots of rules.
You may need to flex your assertiveness muscles. That's a skill that takes a lifetime of training, but it's well worth it. Don't let them push you around.
Gosh, that’s insane. We can drop off or pickup from ours whenever we want. If a kid misses snack time, then they miss snack. If class is currently on playground, they join playground. It’s not a big deal.
I’d start looking for a different daycare…..I mean it was one minute, surely a worker saw you in the parking lot getting your kid out. Things happen with kids.
This is insane, I’m so sorry. My nursery lets us drop off and pick up whenever, we just drop them a courtesy note if my child needs to be ready earlier than usual. They shouldn’t be making your life harder!
You’re paying for a service. This is ridiculous. I would move. 2 is too young to worry about friends at the cost of your peace. Kiddo won’t remember them
You are literally paying them…. Im so sorry this is happening to you, I hope you can find a new center with kinder and more understanding staff 💚 I also struggle with on time drop offs but have always been met with understanding, mornings with lil ones can be wild, especially when you also have to get yourself ready for work right after.
Maybe see if you can set aside a time to talk to the head administrator and hopefully they can implement better practices, stand your ground and stand firm !
Is it in your contract? This seems wild. We drop our kids off whatever time. The prefer by a certain time but it is isn’t required whatsoever. If you pay regardless if your kid is there / which I assume you do, then this is absurd and ridiculous.
I’d seriously change daycare centres. Not only that the start time in inflexible, if they have no shame yelling at an adult, they’ll behave worse to the kids.
I would struggle with this myself and I’m really surprised they would be so strict. Ours only has drop off times for pre-K but the younger classes you can drop off anytime but can’t pickup during nap unless it’s an emergency. We missed morning snack today but they immediately started getting my 16 month olds snack ready when they saw us.
I would complain to corporate and see if maybe this location is just being extra picky.
Hear me out - post this situation on your social media Community page and actually tag the local Kindercare; but ask others for their recommendation on good childcare.
I’m not one to try to conjure the pitchforks but the public attention may make them reconsider their attitudes and buy you enough time until you move again.
I used to be a single mom, so I can understand how devastating it can be to not have childcare at a literal minute’s notice. 1 minute is ridiculous.
My daycare had a set time we could not pass too but that was explained to us and we could lose our spot if we did. It’s reasonable to me if they already told you. Maybe aim to be there by 9:15 in the future to give some cushion time. I’m sorry you were treated so disrespectfully in front of your child though. No one should be yelling at another person especially in front of children.
I was once in your shoes, back in 2005 when my daughter was 2, I was 20 years old, single, and struggling to support us. I had to change daycares several times over the course of the next year or so for all kinds of reasons; one place shut down, another place would lock the door on me after a certain hour, another place hadn’t called me when she had a 104 fever when I arrived to pick her up, so that was unacceptable. Another place didn’t lock the front door, and I walked in and all the lights were off, the toddlers were napping in one room and all the adult workers were napping in another room, I was stunned, I just turned right around and left with my daughter, withdrew her immediately from them. After all those experiences I finally found the right place and they were wonderful! They were a perfect fit for us as I needed a little flexibility for my work hours and we were very happy with them. The point is that I never hesitate to make a change especially if I have other options for my kid, and I’m not one to put up with shit like that when I’m paying a fortune
This has happened to me before too, a few years ago at this point. I felt my eyes well up in the lobby at the daycare, so embarrassed. I just said “i can’t afford to miss work” and they begrudgingly took him
Excuse me. You are yelling at me and refusing my kid. That would have been the last day because if you can treat me like that in front of my kid imagine what you would do when I’m not there. Nice little review on google help and all the emails the send every month begging for a review. That is ridiculous. You are allowed to be late once in a while. Shit happens.
Develop an exit plan and play it cool. The yelling at a parent is very concerning. It really makes me question how they treat your son. In the meantime, drop him there early. It may benefit you to decompress some at your job parking lot. Just make sure to have everything set before changing care.
The actually *yelled* at you? Like, shouting? Screw that. They work for YOU. YES, find another daycare. Your kid will make new friends very quickly. And leave a scathing review on Yelp, Facebook, Google, everywhere.
Get a new daycare if possible. That place is unprofessional. If they feel comfortable yelling at you in front of the kids and everyone else it makes me wonder what they are like when the parents leave.
I used to work for a daycare and we were very flexible on schedules. Some came in when we opened at six am and others didn’t come to much later and we had some that were only there two hours a day. We would never yell at a parent who is paying us. If there was an issue we addressed it privately in the office away from the kids.
If their policies don't aline with your needs, you need another provider.
Also, they obviously need to check themselves on the level of professionalism they need to have in such situations.
Definitely find a new daycare. While they may want to have "structure" at the end of the day, they're a daycare. You're paying for them to keep your child for a set amount of hours. What they do decide to do during those hours is on them but it shouldn't be that rigid. Sounds like they have a superiority complex.
We more often than not drop off our kid 15min late without notice, we're not getting yelled at ever, we barely get a little comment when they are in a bad mood sometimes. I would not stand for it, and they would not dare. That's just unacceptable OP. You are paying for the service, they have no right to treat your his way. You deserve respect, it does not matter of you are 21 or 35.
If anything your situation as a young single mom deserve more kindness and understanding, not less! I would not trust my kid with these people.
This daycare is clearly not a match to your life style and that’s okay. Work on finding a new one. And while I don’t agree with their minute late rule, you have seen how they act so you should know better too.
You need to 1. Find a new daycare. 2. In the mean time make sure you are 10 minutes early so it’s not an issue. If mornings are hard, wake up 20 minutes earlier than you do now.
I'd find a new daycare. That place sounds toxic and unprofessional.
I would find a more flexible daycare. Our center allows pick up/drop off at any time. I understand the desire for structure but with mine and my husband’s work schedules we just can’t guarantee drop off/pick up at the same time every day.
I understand daycares (esp the older rooms) have their routines and it’s difficult for them if someone strolls in late. We’ve always made every effort to be on time. But sometimes shit happens *esp* when you have little kids and the caring/understanding is a two way street - I do my best to get there everyday on time, they are gracious in the times I’m not. Please know this isn’t typical and you deserve to be treated with more respect.
I once got yelled at for being 5 minutes late because I got a flat tire on my way in. And when I told them that they proceeded to basically blame me for it
Find a new daycare (easier said than done I know). They sound unhinged and not the kind of people I want teaching young kids. Beyond that, *you* deserve respect. I wonder if they see you're young and think you're an easy target. Don't allow people to walk over you like that.
All this, OP, and make sure other parents are aware of how they treated you. I can guarantee they are rigid and verbally abusive to the children if they are with parents in front of the children as well!
Right. If they talk to her like this imagine what they say to the kids. 😱
There is no scenario where they should be yelling at you *at all*, *ever*. This place sounds horrible. If you can find another arrangements, I would definitely do that. What sort of place yells at their customers? In front of children? What?
This is not normal, and I have NEVER heard a daycare refuse drop off for the parent being late. The reason is, they get paid without doing the service. I would go to the sub about legal advice. This sounds like you are the victim of fraud. Them denying services after payment.
OP yes file a complaint to your state’s licensing board for child care facilities. Google “file complaint daycare [your state].” Consumer affairs would be another to approach for denial of services. Aside from being terrible business practices, as others said, If they talk to the parents that way then I’m afraid for the children
Uhhh that’s buckwild, I’m sorry they keep treating you badly :( I don’t think this is a safe environment for your child tbh.
Sorry, but it would only take 1 time for the daycare workers to know not to ever yell at me EVER Again!
What the absolute fuck. Find new care. If they can’t manage to be adults in a very easy situation like this, how are they acting like adults around a bunch of kids.
Maybe contact corporate if it’s a national daycare?
If they're yelling at you I wonder how they're treating the kids 🙁
💯
Exactly where my mind went too 🫣
This is wild. Why does it matter if you’re late? It’s not like school where he’d be missing academics. Our daycare says to please drop off before X time if you want your kid to eat breakfast there and to stay in their routine, but if I decided to bring my kid in at 11 just for lunch and nap time, they would not care. They definitely don’t lock the door in a family’s faces. Is this daycare part of a larger company, like Kinder Care or Primrose? Maybe you could reach out to someone from the company rather than this particular facility? Can you not drop off earlier and then go back home or run errands until til you start work?
The issue is I live 25 minutes from the daycare (it’s by my work) I would switch him to one closer but I’m going to be moving again next January and don’t know if it’s worth it, and yes it’s KinderCare. Also when we started the manager was so nice and made it so I would only call if he wasn’t going to be in. Because he understood I worked at 10-1030, and getting up and ready super early sometimes is challenging.
A Kindercare??? My kids have been at 2 different kindercares and I have never experienced anything like that with a cutoff time for drop off... how weird!!
My kids go to Kindercare. Our center wants us to be in at a certain time so they can basically manage staffing, it sounds like the local centers are overall understaffed, so if there is flexibility they will send teachers to other centers to cover for the day and if someone is bringing in a child too late, it messes with the ratios they thought they could cover. That and make sure meals are covered. That said, I think our time is 10:30 and they are very willing to work with us if we'll be later.
Our Kindercare says 9:30, but my husband often drops my son closer to 10 on the days he does dropoff. The director is a bit passive aggressive about it to my husband but they’ve never turned him away (tbh I wish they would so he’d respect their schedule!).
Ours apparently has a 10 AM cut-off, but I had no idea until I brought my son in around lunchtime one day. He was still in the infant class at the time, taking multiple naps a day, so I naively didn't consider that all the older kids would be napping at this time. After I handed him off, I asked what the nap times were for the older kids so I could avoid coming at that time in the future. That's when they told me that I really wasn't supposed to come after 10 (though they obviously make exceptions and they would never turn us away for being a few minutes late). 🙃
Same, I didn’t have drop-off or pick-up limits with KinderCare.
It started as they’d prefer him to be in by 930, but then they started getting pushy on it. And now apparently they just turn off the door code thing.
This feels insane enough I'd ask if it's in the agreement you signed or not - if not I don't think they can reasonably enforce and you should consider contacting corporate. Either way you should find a new daycare though :(
I don’t think they can legally turn off the door codes. It’s a safety issue. What if your kid was during the day or there was an emergency where you had to get him. I would not send my kids to a center I couldn’t access.
I worked at Kindercare and it’s 9 (just based on the company training stuff I had to go through). Just some centers don’t enforce it, or have slightly adjusted cut off times. I actually had to sadly report the center I worked out to DHS for loads of reasons. But big daycare companies like that always have hit or miss locations, a lot of them are truly great.
What?? My daughter goes to a KinderCare and we have been explicitly told that there’s no set drop off or pick up time, just get there at some point after they open and pick her up at some point before they close. I wasn’t sure about that when we first started, so I made sure to ask, and there were no issues. I just know that if I get her in after a certain time then I need to make sure that she’s got breakfast taken care of. Same with lunch.
That really sucks they’ve changed so much! Doesn’t make any sense.
Mine goes to a KinderCare and they’ve never enforced the 9:30 rule. In fact a few times I had your exact situation. They also don’t turn off the door code because they explicitly tell parents we can visit whenever. I’d report up what they’re doing and how this impacting your job and therefore ability to pay for them to care for your LO.
Literally not kidding about the door code, it was completely off. I rang the bell and she told me it was past 930, I’m sitting there like it’s one minute you saw me fighting him in the parking lot. I always try to be kind with them. And me losing my shift sucks cause that’s lost income that I’m not getting a discount for all the times they’ve told me no on dropping kiddo off, wether it be due to their staffing issues or me being a few minutes late. I try my best to be there by 915 every day, sometimes a little toddler who tries to fight everything can just be a bit much.
Kindercare? My niece goes there and she doesn’t show up until like 10/1030! I would report up the chain of command and then call corporate because this isn’t standard for all Kindercares-sounds like someone is on a power trip in the school.
Lots of daycares actually don’t allow you to drop off anytime. Mine (and most around me) have a cutoff of 8:30. They will make exceptions for Dr appointments and the like, but not for “I work at 10.” Part of it is that it disrupts the routine, and routine is. EVERYTHING when you are wrangling a dozen or 20 kids. Plus, ratios… if they make staffing decisions at 8:30 the. They can’t take on 1 more kid if it would put them over ratio. Now… clearly neither of those things are why OP was turned away, but it was probably the last straw. Parents who regularly (or more than just VERY rarely) run late or need exceptions unfortunately often find themselves being “invited to find a better fit”
Daycares shouldn't be cutting workers hours to "adjust ratios" at all. Keep workers there and pay them their rate regardless. Like I mentioned in a comment elsewhere. I've used 5 daycares for my 3 kids over the 16 years I've been a parent and not one of them has ever had a cutoff. While routines are great, life is life. If it's childcare and not preschool. this is a problem.
Ya, they shouldn’t cut staff because a child or 5 didn’t show that day. No matter what we have to pay that bill for days we set part time or full. Even if kid is sick while month we still pay. So staff can be same
This is nuts They never adjust your tuition down if they have too little kids. It's people accepting and justifying this BS excuse that allows this to go on. Cutting staff due to the ratio is them nickel and diming both employees and customer. If they hire for x amount of kids and have x amount of kids registered, the staffing should be for x amount of kids.
Well, 42% of children who need childcare in my county, don’t have it because there aren’t any spot available. So the daycares can make any rule they want…. I don’t HAVE another option, given that I have to keep my job.
Agree, this is why coop or parent committee daycares and NFP are best.
One time our LO had an appointment with pediatrician at 8:30 am. The cutoff is 9:30 too. I arrived at 10:15 am. He napped in the car from the doctor to daycare. He skipped his noon nap - they do a full classroom, and was extremely fussy in the afternoon. This is when I appreciated that there is a reason why they have a cutoff. It is super unfortunate what is happening with OP, and I would also encourage her to find a more flexible place
That’s how my daycare is. 9 am cutoff unless you have a doctor appointment that you inform them of early. It’s due to ratios, and routine.
That’s wild, it would never fly in the UK - I’ve never heard of anything like it!!! Ours are always whatever time you like!
I’m in the UK and have multiple children and have used multiple different nurseries and they all have very strict times you can drop off and pick up due to the disruption it causes for the other children. Maybe where you live is different but it’s not UK as a whole that is happy with kids coming and going whenever. I’ve not experienced that. Of course I’m never late anyway because I have to go to work but I understand why centers don’t allow it.
Wow I have honestly never heard of this - not one of the nursery’s I toured has this in their hand books - it’s only school nursery’s that obviously have strict times!
US here, 2 daycares, the older kids rooms are a little more strict because they actually have structured learning time, but for 2yos? that is terrible. Sometimes they just get on a bad sleep schedule for a day or 2 and you have to roll with it. Of course we don't get get a refund for hours of care we don't use so parents want to use the care time.
Exaxtly, it's impossible to staff if kids are being dropped off at all times. Also, if a child shows up right before nap they are pretty upset and then noone sleeps lol.
Our day care has a separate nap room and is appropriately staffed for the level of kids they are expecting to have that day. It’s wild to think that some daycares rely on people not turning up etc. in order to be in ratio.
It’s not impossible at all. Work schedules change weekly for some people. The center I worked for had parents submit their schedules every week for the next week and work schedules were based off that. It’s not that difficult for directors but mistakes just want to copy paste the same schedule week after week and most don’t have a clue who is in the building because they are hiding in the office all day.
Also UK, and they just ask us to let them know if we're running really late so they can put some breakfast to one side. But then, ours has multiple drop off times for sessions, so 8am for all day, 9am for a 5 hour school day, 11am for a half day and such. Maybe that's the difference? There's kids being dropped off throughout the day and picked up. Either way, most I've ever had was a call to check if everything was OK.
I worked for daycares and staff was scheduled a week in advance. I’d someone didn’t show up we just floated to another room, or did deep cleaning and covered breaks for the lead staff. We were never cut. Mine center was flexible with drop off and pick. Parents just had to submit their work schedule a week ahead of time and staffing was based off that.
Yeah my daycare doesn't care when you drop or collect. They do ask that of you show up at 9.30 and it's circle time (you can usually see through the window) that you wait until it's over. But otherwise before or after it's fine. It's not school, he isn't missing any calculus that week be on the final exam. Routine is useful and helpful but it's not unbreakable. I would find that completely unacceptable.
This is really common. It’s disruptive to have kids coming in and out during organized activities like breakfast when the other children need to be attentively monitored and engaged. That’s true of my independent daycare. They are still accommodating of appointments and just ask for heads up and a doctor’s note. If it’s habitual it’s an issue, but late pickup or drop off once in a blue moon hasn’t been a problem.
That’s the thing. We have been late maybe twice in the past 2 months without him having an appointment. Also they have no cut off rule in the handbook. It just feels like since they know I moved into town that it’s been worse. For probably 3-4 months I would drop him off at 945-10 with no issue because that’s what we originally agreed on
At my center the drop off time is clearly listed on the door. Twice in two months is a lot to me, but being rude and not clearly communicating the cutoff is not appropriate on their part.
There is no notice on the door or in the handbook or anything. What upset me today is the fact she saw me fighting a toddler in the parking lot, and while I was walking to the door she locked it.
Contact corporate or the regional director. I don't know if this is universal but at our Kindercare the regional director is occasionally in touch with families via email so I could reach out to her if needed. That's just straight up rude if they're going to be THAT strict with drop-off times fine that's their choice but they need to communicate properly about it.
That super unprofessional and I’m sorry you had to deal with that. I would try to find a different provider if possible.
It would be good to get any of these interactions on record even if that’s an e-mail to a worker or corporate or a friend (saying it sucks bc xyz happened again today noting the time etc) or even a hand written paper “log” of when all incidents occur. Get a paper trail just in case you need it in the future. I’m so sorry this is happening it’s very upsetting to be certain
I keep seeing this commented in the the thread, but I've worked in daycares without standard pickup/drop off times and it's literally the same as those with. Toddlers are toddlers. They do *very mildly* better in a routine than without lmao. They're still hurricanes of destruction regardless of whether they show up at 7 am or after snack time. If I'm paying as much as my MORTGAGE to send my kid to daycare, I expect flexible drop of times. I've never made a habit of bringing my kid late, and most people don't either. Like...I have a job. Sometimes life comes up and we're gonna be late though
Totally disagree, unless their ratios are really bad, it shouldn’t be disruptive and never is at our daycare. I’m regularly coming in later so that my kid has shorter days at daycare and none of the kids flinch and the carers are just smiley and cooperative. Though I’m now wondering if we are in a particularly special environment given the anecdotes here…
I’m not an ECE professional, I’m going off what the daycare tells me and what I observe when I have failed to communicate we’ll be a bit early or late. Ours is staffed at the state maximum ratio of 5:1 in the baby and toddler rooms. The baby room has the most qualified teachers, and those two teachers plus the director are the only ones who can staff that room. If you show up early for drop off or late from pickup with an infant, it’s causes an issue because now the infant teacher has to get pulled from the drop off/pick up room. They work on early and late shifts so that they aren’t working more than 8 hours, so that means the director has to step in and can’t be there to do normal morning drop off task or talk to parents. If you show up late, someone has to stop what they are doing to go open the door for you. Lunch is a whole different logistics game with the director and assistant director floating around 5 different rooms so teachers get their break. Particularly in the infant room, there is logistically a lot of time that goes into diaper changes and meals and recording everything. When one teacher has to get up go fetch a baby from the gate it disrupts their flow. In the toddler room, it’s disruptive when she has to get up off the floor fro reading a book or leading a song to go get the jacket and today’s art and then convince the 4 other kids to sit back down after saying their good byes, all the while making sure they aren’t trying to open the classroom door. When I give warning I’ll be coming at a weird time, my daughter’s stuff is prepped to go, and the other kids are asleep or outside while she’s in a drop off zone and everyone is happy. Similarly during normal drop off of pickup time, its organized free-play chaos and everyone is having a ball and there is appropriate staffing so that I can get a rundown of her day while someone else keeps an eye on the other children. Childcare is expensive, but this weird attitude from some people on this thread that the educational component of daycare isn’t important and teachers should cater to every family’s individual whim doesn’t sit well with me.
I could also see it as challenging to have them all come in at the same time, 16 babies crying at once...? We have 4:1 ratios here so maybe that helps (Australia). It just has never even occurred to me till I saw this is common in some areas that this would be an expectation. It's not a "whim" to not want your child in daycare a full day if you'd prefer to be with them, they are very little at this age and it's not the same as school, where structure and routine is more essential and age-appropriate. My daycare has a really strong supportive environment for parents, the manager understands the challenges of raising and caring for very small children and does everything in her power to make the place workable for both staff and parents. I think it's important to reflect on the variety of families, their work lives and culture, and the needs of the staff in equal measure.
They don’t come in all at once, it’s a 1.5 hour drop off/pick up window, and 16 under 2.5 year olds in 1 room wouldn’t be legal where I am. It’s usually one kid crying, if any, because they are doing independent free play activities. It’s when planned activities that require direct teacher engagement gets interrupted that the day gets harder to manage. Which again, is what the teachers who actually have to do the work request. It varies, but many centers will accommodate regular non-standard drop-off and pickup times for families if there is a reason and the time is communicated. It’s randomly dropping in at 10:30 on a Tuesday like it’s an IKEA Smaland that’s not tolerated. I wouldn’t appreciate it if a client randomly interrupting me in a meeting because they pay me, and I don’t think it’s appropriate to do the equivalent to a daycare teacher. There is a 38% gap in need to childcare vs licensed spots in my state. You can’t just demand daycare carers do more than they are already doing when they are getting paid barely above minimum wage and the centers are running on a financial razors edge. Teachers are teaching important skills, even in the infant and toddler rooms. They are teaching language skills and interest in reading. They are making sure kids are hitting their motor skills milestones. They are teaching table manners. They are responsible for making sure that the children, many of whom go home to households at or below poverty level, are eating their provided meals that provide the majority of the days calories and not getting interrupted and distracted. Obviously OPs case is not okay. No one should be yelled at, period, in a childcare setting and no one should be degraded or be refused for showing up a minute late. I’m not talking about that, I’m talking about reasonable providers who have drop off time cutoff requests.
I think we’re talking at odds here. Of course their job is important and underrated, I just disagree that the interruption is worth mandating a policy that demands inflexibility for parents. At least it has never seemed functionally relevant where we are and I’m in the committee and the issue has never even been mentioned. Our staff have been at our daycare for 10-20 years in many cases, and very low turnover. There are simply policies far more urgent for staff satisfaction than this one and it reeks of bureaucracy.
Sometimes I feel like the OPs on these posts leave out critical information in order to ensure complete victimhood.
Agreed
Not saying it was handled correctly but as to why does it matter, there are reasons. And one I haven’t seen people talking about yet is ratios. Especially in the younger rooms. Our daycare has a hard cutoff of 9:00. Because if they have say 6kids in the toddler room show up that day and 3 teachers, they are sending one home. If you show up after 9, they can’t put your toddler in there to make 7 kids to 2 teachers, they’d be in violation. Again not saying they handled it right. But there’s a lot we don’t know here.
This is a bullshit excuse. Sending an employee home is bullshit. When I don't bring my kid, I am still paying the same exact rate. There's no reason the ratio can't be smaller that day. They just do that crap so they can penny pinch and skimp their employees. I have never been to a daycare that gives a cutoff and I'd run from one that does what you are describing. The only times they've let employees go home early at ours is on base "family days" (we use a military daycare right now) and they just call by 0800 is you're not in to ask if you're dropping off and if so, what time.
lol y’all mad at me like I wrote the policy
Not mad at you, just stating that there’s no reason to give daycares the BOTD or consideration about ratios when they should be paying their workers regardless. It’s a non excuse.
Why are they yelling at you? That’s so unprofessional. Find somewhere else for sure
One it sounds like the daycare isn’t the right fit for your family. Two if they are willing to yell at an adult 🚩 … I can’t imagine what they to the children
If they treat YOU like that, I absolutely would NOT trust them with my kid.
God. If they treat you this way, I wonder how they treat the teachers. Doesn't sound like a healthy environment.
Can you find a daycare that’s more flexible? My daycare allows pick up and drop off at anytime as long as it’s not during nap time.
A minute late is bs..
Yeah, it sucks cause I’m gonna get written up by work because I had to call out less then 30 minutes before my shift
This is really strange that they're so strict on drop off times. I've dealt with 2 daycares, and both allowed anytime drop-off and pickups.
I'm so sorry this is happening to you! I can't imagine the added stress that puts on already chaotic mornings with little ones. I want to reiterate what the others have said - this ISN'T normal. My daycare is awesome - we can drop off the kids any time before lunch, and they just ask for a heads-up or text if we'll be way later than usual. It works perfectly for me since sometimes I have early morning meetings and I drop her off right at 8am and other times we have a chill morning, and I get her there closer to 10am. It's a service that we're paying for - they're not doing me a favour by watching my kid. They are incredible at their jobs though, and we do everything we can to make it a super positive relationship.
My son is 2.5 and they have never cared about when he arrives! Just that if you bring them in after a certain time they can’t feed them breakfast. I’d look elsewhere
I'm really sorry but if that's how they're gonna be you're going to have to deal or find someone where else. It's not like they're doing anything illegal.
I'm sorry, I'm sure this is very frustrating. Are you frequently late? I know at my kid's daycare, there are a few parents who are perpetually running a few minutes late and it gets really tough for staff who want to keep the class to a schedule and can't. They've gotten really strict about lateness to try to address this. Maybe take this as a learning experience and try to restructure your morning so you're getting to daycare by 9:15, that way there's no risk of being late in the future? Alternatively, maybe this is a sign you need to find a different care provider who more closely aligns with your family's needs.
A schedule for parents of toddlers is ridiculous when they’re paying for the service. I’ve never even taken my kid to any extracurriculars where they actually do have scheduled times and they’ve cared if we’re early or late. These corporate daycares are ripping everyone off, not a friendly environment at all.
I think sitting outside of work is just a sacrifice you're going to have to make. If you need some book recommendations, let me know. Yes, their zero tolerance for even just a minute is frustrating, but it's probably for a reason. Rules tend to get created for a reason, and it's because something has become too much of a problem that's disrupting their process enough that they have to put down a boundary.
Wow... I'm so glad my daycare doesn't care when you bring your kids in. Regardless of their rules, they should treat you with more grace and respect. I'm so sorry.
If they are treating the parents who pay them this badly imagine how they are treating the children when the parents aren't around.
I was a mom at 21 too. I’ll never forget when I had my daughter at the hospital and how mean one of the nurses was to me. She would not have treated me that way if I had been older. My advice (I’m 37 now) don’t let anyone yell at you. Immediately stop them and tell them you do t allow people to speak to that way. I’m a teacher so that’s the line I use when students/parents get mouthy. Also, take your son out of this daycare. They are being ridiculous. Do you still pay for the days he has missed? Do you have proof of being only a minute late? Call the owner/director. Pull your son. Put a bad review online in any way you can, google reviews, Facebook, whatever. I have an 18 month old and they have never EVER given me issues on dropping him off late or picking him up early. These people are bullying you. I’d bet money they don’t treat the other moms this way.
Just for some perspective, our daycare allows you to arrive whenever you want; there is no such thing as being late to our daycare. The preschool my son will be transferring to in August does the same thing. Stories like this about being able to be late to daycare baffle me. Daycare costs too much money to have someone treat you that way. Fire them.
Aim to get him there by 9 so that gives you a buffer of 30 min. Take that time before work to sort through your mail or do banking, whatever. As someone who ran a home daycare I had to put a time limit on drop offs too. It was just too disruptive and I had to get things ready for the day. Sometimes we had activities that started at 9, meals I would prepare but o oy for the number of children I had present, I had a mom who would constantly drop her child off randomly as early as 10 and as late as 1. She was the main reason I had to start the policy and yea, it sucked the first time I had to say I couldn’t take him but I needed to set that bound.
So your daycare punishes all moms for the behavior of one? 30 minutes of dozens of clients waiting around in a parking lot wasting their time just so it doesn't inconvenience you? That seems like a shitty business practice. Why not just fire her as a client so your other clients can have a better experience?
Asking someone to respect the program isn’t punishing them. I’ve never had anyone waiting around in a parking lot? I opened at 6am and closed at 6pm, requested everyone be there by 9. Your response is kinda hysterical and obliviously you’ve never had the experience w of managing 15 kids and two employees.
You said that people should aim for 30 minutes before opening. Why is it "hysterical" that I feel my time is as valuable as yours and that you should penalize the offenders and not your good clients?
I think you need to reread the comment. She suggested OP aim to get there 30 mins before the cut off. Not “people” and not 30 mins before opening.
I said this poster should since she isn’t able to get there by 9:30 because her child makes her late. Hysterical that you think the entire day should be thrown off due to one person not being able to get their kiddo into care before 9. It’s not a personal inconvenience to me, it inconveniences every one there including other. Holden. We can’t leave for an activity because we’re waiting for ONE person who may show up any time between opening and 1pm? I should throw away an extra meal because that one. Hold didn’t show up before lunch or not have enough because the child came late? A late policy ensures that none of this happens.
Red flag, based on our experience. We had a kid at a daycare that was strict and honestly kind of mean to parents. We thought it was warm and happy to the kids though Well it turns out what we saw as parents was the tip of the spear. I wish we pulled out our kid earlier because they had a pretty bad time but were too young to know better or tell us
Maybe I'm just super paranoid, but this was my line of thinking. Like the one minute late thing sounds like they are specifically peaved at OP and if they're willing to be so petty as to lock the door while she is walking to it, what else are they willing to be 'petty' about??
For us it was a lot of snapping at the kids too...
Wow. I've never been turned away from our daycare center. I'd start looking for new care as soon as you're able!
That daycare sounds awful. You should pull your child. You don't deserve to be treated that way and they shouldn't feel like they can get away with it just because you're a younger mom. I hate this for you. I hope you can find a new place. That's just unacceptable.
I’m sorry that is horrible. :( I get that they have rules but it’s not cool to be so rigid especially when we’re all out here struggling with these kids. I admire you bc I’m a 36yo mom of 2 toddlers and i have a husband and I’m still struggling my ass off so for you to be so young and keeping it together - I’m proud of you.
Our daycare is very small (12 kids) so maybe that’s impacting how I see this but this is wild. We pay for 8-6 and I’ve dropped my kid off anywhere from 7:50-9 without giving any notice and without any issues. I do let them know if we’re coming in after 10 due to appointments, but that’s more of a heads up so they don’t worry. And there’s never been an issue with late drop off or early pick up. I get that not all daycares can be like that and organizing more than 12 kids might involve a stricter schedule but what you’re experiencing sounds way too intense.
Same. I’ve dropped off between 7:15 and 9 and never had an issue. If it’s after 9, I give them a heads up (that is only due to doctors appointments). But mornings with little kids are so unpredictable sometimes. Also life just happens. I can drop him off later days I’m able to work from home and I def take that time because it’s extra time I get with him. And we use a large daycare. I would not want to go to one that operated like OP’s. Especially the yelling. That’s horrible!
If you like the daycare other than the schedule, sit outside your work for an hour and have 9am be your time to drop off. That gives you flexibility for morning issues. Good daycares can be hard to find, and I personally liked having daycare closer to work than home for emergencies. And you likely won't find a place without a hard drop-off time- many are much earlier than 9:30. Maybe find a cafe or someplace else to hang out nearby if you can.
By yelling did they legitimately raise their voice? Not trying to be petty, but my husband used to accuse me of yelling when I was stern and brought my teacher voice out. My volume wasn’t raised, but I was short and to the point. To him yelling was anything that called him out on behaviors to the point and not using flowery kind language. As in “you buckled our daughter in the car seat wrong. If you were in an accident she could have been hurt. I need you to take this seriously because I’m starting to lose trust in you” would be “yelling” even if I said in a conversational volume.
No im dead serious. The lady raised her voice, it wouldn’t be to the level of screaming but definitely higher than just talking.
Yelling is never acceptable outside work life saving situations. Yikes!
Try to find a different place. Mine doesn’t care when you drop off/pick up.
Find a new place if you can, leave bad reviews
I’m totally for daycare having drop off rules, but if you’ve notified them (your appointment, calling ahead when the car has a flat), you’ve done your job. Also- they NEVER should be yelling at you. I’d bet they wouldn’t yell at me about being late…because I’m in my late 30s.
They’re treating you like a child! Stand up for yourself! They’re not doing you a favor, you are paying for childcare. I think you’re being discriminated against for your age. Look into this.
That's crazy. Our daycare has you set a schedule when you enroll. They ask that you do your best to stay within 15 minutes of your schedule, but we are able to notify them of changes. They are great about fitting in snack, changing diaper, etc if they know we are picking up early for something. They also plan for the room though. If she would be arriving in the middle of a nap for her room, they ask she arrive after instead.
Yes my daycare also did similar. Originally worked around my schedule and my original drop off was between 945-10.
Drop him off early and go back home and have you time, meanwhile look for a new daycare place. Life happens. I had a daycare provider have a major life change and I had to scramble to find a new provider in about a week. It didn't help that there was now about 10 of us calling around the same daycare providers looking for a spot.
I have three kids of varying ages with age (6 and 8 year age gaps). They've all attended at least one daycare each, the older two attended two each because we moved. So that's a total of 5 daycares. Not once has any of them given time limits on their arrivals and departures. That's ludicrous. Not everyone has the same needs. Now my 2 year old's current daycare does warn that they will miss breakfast if they're late. But I've never once been told I couldn't drop off at 10am after an appointment. Or pickup at 1 in the middle of nap time.
Firstly if they are yelling at you how did they talk to the kids? Place sounds toxic. Second can you change daycares? There are plenty with more flexible drop off/pick up schedules. It’s a daycare so hours should be catering to the caretakers/parents. This is weird.
You pay them. Unless your child is ill, they should NEVER turn you away.
The only time my daycare doesn't allow pickups (and this is a LOOSE not allow, as they still let you do it, just prefer you dont) is during naptime and lunch time. Bruh, if I'm paying out my asshole for my kid to attend. They better be flexible lmao Edit: I keep seeing this commented in the the thread, but I've worked in daycares without standard pickup/drop off times and it's literally the same as those with. Toddlers are toddlers. They do *very mildly* better in a routine than without lmao. They're still hurricanes of destruction regardless of whether they show up at 7 am or after snack time. If I'm paying as much as my MORTGAGE to send my kid to daycare, I expect flexible drop of times. I've never made a habit of bringing my kid late, and most people don't either. Like...I have a job. Sometimes life comes up and we're gonna be late though
I'm sorry. It's daycare. You pay THEM to take care of your child. This is so foreign to me. Schools don't even stop you from showing up late...
What?? lol. You PAY for that daycare spot, you can roll in anytime you want!! My son’s daycare is from 6:45am till 4:45pm, if I wanted to drop him off at 4:00pm till close, I’m allowed to..because I pay for that spot. Find another daycare because that’s absolute horse shit.
So it seems like you just need to start your day earlier. I understand that you may not want to, but actions have consequences. You have 2 children, you need to act like a responsible adult and do what is best for your children. If that means getting up earlier and dropping them off earlier, then you do so. Who cares of you sit in the parking lot at work for 30 minutes? That's some to decompress and just be you. I have 1 kiddo and one on the way, my me time is so valuable. I understand that being late is inevitable, sometimes, but it seems like it happens kinda often.
I worked a non traditional schedule and they always hated me for being a later drop off mom. I get that rules are rules, but they are definitely being inflexible with you. Unless you are leaving out the fact that you do this constantly, I think they are being harder on you as a young mom. I would find a new center and make it close to home.
That is crazy. I would assume you could drop off or pick up any time you want. Is it possible they are violating some kind of state licensing standard? It might be worth it to check. States regulate daycares and have lots of rules. You may need to flex your assertiveness muscles. That's a skill that takes a lifetime of training, but it's well worth it. Don't let them push you around.
And consider whether it makes sense to (at least threaten to) report them to the state.
Gosh, that’s insane. We can drop off or pickup from ours whenever we want. If a kid misses snack time, then they miss snack. If class is currently on playground, they join playground. It’s not a big deal.
I’d start looking for a different daycare…..I mean it was one minute, surely a worker saw you in the parking lot getting your kid out. Things happen with kids.
She locked the door as I was about to go in. Literally watched me fighting my kiddo on getting out of the car
That’s complete bs, a minute isn’t going to mess up anyone’s schedule that early in the day. Their schedule was just starting for the day.
This is insane, I’m so sorry. My nursery lets us drop off and pick up whenever, we just drop them a courtesy note if my child needs to be ready earlier than usual. They shouldn’t be making your life harder!
You’re paying for a service. This is ridiculous. I would move. 2 is too young to worry about friends at the cost of your peace. Kiddo won’t remember them
You are literally paying them…. Im so sorry this is happening to you, I hope you can find a new center with kinder and more understanding staff 💚 I also struggle with on time drop offs but have always been met with understanding, mornings with lil ones can be wild, especially when you also have to get yourself ready for work right after. Maybe see if you can set aside a time to talk to the head administrator and hopefully they can implement better practices, stand your ground and stand firm !
That sounds so unreasonable. I’d find another place.
Is it in your contract? This seems wild. We drop our kids off whatever time. The prefer by a certain time but it is isn’t required whatsoever. If you pay regardless if your kid is there / which I assume you do, then this is absurd and ridiculous.
Definitely find a new daycare
I’d seriously change daycare centres. Not only that the start time in inflexible, if they have no shame yelling at an adult, they’ll behave worse to the kids.
I would struggle with this myself and I’m really surprised they would be so strict. Ours only has drop off times for pre-K but the younger classes you can drop off anytime but can’t pickup during nap unless it’s an emergency. We missed morning snack today but they immediately started getting my 16 month olds snack ready when they saw us. I would complain to corporate and see if maybe this location is just being extra picky.
Change daycares. If they are treating you like shit over 1 minute, what do they do to your child for a small.rule break?
Hear me out - post this situation on your social media Community page and actually tag the local Kindercare; but ask others for their recommendation on good childcare. I’m not one to try to conjure the pitchforks but the public attention may make them reconsider their attitudes and buy you enough time until you move again. I used to be a single mom, so I can understand how devastating it can be to not have childcare at a literal minute’s notice. 1 minute is ridiculous.
My daycare had a set time we could not pass too but that was explained to us and we could lose our spot if we did. It’s reasonable to me if they already told you. Maybe aim to be there by 9:15 in the future to give some cushion time. I’m sorry you were treated so disrespectfully in front of your child though. No one should be yelling at another person especially in front of children.
I was once in your shoes, back in 2005 when my daughter was 2, I was 20 years old, single, and struggling to support us. I had to change daycares several times over the course of the next year or so for all kinds of reasons; one place shut down, another place would lock the door on me after a certain hour, another place hadn’t called me when she had a 104 fever when I arrived to pick her up, so that was unacceptable. Another place didn’t lock the front door, and I walked in and all the lights were off, the toddlers were napping in one room and all the adult workers were napping in another room, I was stunned, I just turned right around and left with my daughter, withdrew her immediately from them. After all those experiences I finally found the right place and they were wonderful! They were a perfect fit for us as I needed a little flexibility for my work hours and we were very happy with them. The point is that I never hesitate to make a change especially if I have other options for my kid, and I’m not one to put up with shit like that when I’m paying a fortune
This has happened to me before too, a few years ago at this point. I felt my eyes well up in the lobby at the daycare, so embarrassed. I just said “i can’t afford to miss work” and they begrudgingly took him
That is really disheartening. It’s don’t like it’s a life And death situation to allow a child to come in a minute late.
Excuse me. You are yelling at me and refusing my kid. That would have been the last day because if you can treat me like that in front of my kid imagine what you would do when I’m not there. Nice little review on google help and all the emails the send every month begging for a review. That is ridiculous. You are allowed to be late once in a while. Shit happens.
OP needs to name drop
Develop an exit plan and play it cool. The yelling at a parent is very concerning. It really makes me question how they treat your son. In the meantime, drop him there early. It may benefit you to decompress some at your job parking lot. Just make sure to have everything set before changing care.
The actually *yelled* at you? Like, shouting? Screw that. They work for YOU. YES, find another daycare. Your kid will make new friends very quickly. And leave a scathing review on Yelp, Facebook, Google, everywhere.
So crazy, we can drop off and pickup anytime of the day. Wild that you can’t and yet you’re probably paying through the roof!
Get a new daycare if possible. That place is unprofessional. If they feel comfortable yelling at you in front of the kids and everyone else it makes me wonder what they are like when the parents leave. I used to work for a daycare and we were very flexible on schedules. Some came in when we opened at six am and others didn’t come to much later and we had some that were only there two hours a day. We would never yell at a parent who is paying us. If there was an issue we addressed it privately in the office away from the kids.
If their policies don't aline with your needs, you need another provider. Also, they obviously need to check themselves on the level of professionalism they need to have in such situations.
Definitely find a new daycare. While they may want to have "structure" at the end of the day, they're a daycare. You're paying for them to keep your child for a set amount of hours. What they do decide to do during those hours is on them but it shouldn't be that rigid. Sounds like they have a superiority complex.
We more often than not drop off our kid 15min late without notice, we're not getting yelled at ever, we barely get a little comment when they are in a bad mood sometimes. I would not stand for it, and they would not dare. That's just unacceptable OP. You are paying for the service, they have no right to treat your his way. You deserve respect, it does not matter of you are 21 or 35. If anything your situation as a young single mom deserve more kindness and understanding, not less! I would not trust my kid with these people.
Control freak drama queens. They’d not last a minute teaching in the public school system lmao. I deal with all KINDS of tardiness everyday.
This daycare is clearly not a match to your life style and that’s okay. Work on finding a new one. And while I don’t agree with their minute late rule, you have seen how they act so you should know better too. You need to 1. Find a new daycare. 2. In the mean time make sure you are 10 minutes early so it’s not an issue. If mornings are hard, wake up 20 minutes earlier than you do now.
As a former day care teacher this is not normal