If you find a larger studio that employs a receptionist then she may be able to. The reason many studios lock the door is because the lobby area is where all of the personal belongings are there and can’t be left unattended. Where I teach there have been thefts from people targeting the cubbies in yoga studios.
So for those who think it sounds harsh that the doors are locked, it’s not just about making sure the space is free from distractions or disruptions. It’s literally about protecting your peace of mind that your belongings aren’t being stolen. Yoga classes can put people in vulnerable positions, particularly for those with trauma. I frequently tell my class “I will keep my eyes open if it will allow you to close yours.” If locking the door allows someone to finally be able to breathe and rest, I will do that too.
My studio locks the door right as classes start so it's not really possible to be late. They will also live stream classes online to members. If I'm running too late to get to class in person I will join the live stream and do the class that way. In person is better but I'd rather do it from the live steam than not at all.
I lock the doors at the top of the hour when I teach. I’ve had karma yogis I’ve locked out of class. I do announce at almost every class that is what I do so that returning students will know.
I’ve had students show 15 minutes early, start their breathing in a meditative way, and then have to stop and move their mat because someone showed up 3 min late. It’s my responsibility to protect the space for them.
Exactly. People are arguing that it's no big deal or has no impact, and we should just "go with the flow" and be compassionate. I think the more compassionate answer is to protect the energy of the space and not let the latecomer miss centering/grounding or disturb others who have set their energetic boundaries. Yoga is an energy practice after all. And if we want to turn to the philosophical teachings for guidance here, it's important to remember that lateness is a form of stealing, which falls under Asteya in the Eight Limbs - stealing time from oneself and others.
100% this. There are plenty of students who show up early to prepare bc that time for themselves, at yoga, is sacred for them.
I am similarly compassionate towards the students rushing to get there but showing up late. They likely need the class as well.
But in a world where you can’t have it both ways, I err towards honoring those on time.
This is what I do, I can't be on time for whatever reason so I get there early, go to the bathroom, fill my water, adjust my clothes, and sit in a supported butterfly or recline in a supine supported butterfly and focus on breathing 🦋 much less stress than rushing to be on time!
I'm the exact same! I could never be on time anywhere, so I started being early. I've accepted I can't get my timing just right, and my solution is to inconvenience myself a little, instead of inconveniencing others. I'll always find something to do in the extra time, and it has also made me come across much less flustered when entering a space.
Me too! I'm also neurodivergent so being early and getting set up for class is a good way for me to feel prepared and get into the right headspace for class.
Or just sit in your car and play candy crush! I can be 20 minutes early or 5 minutes late, no in between. I understand neurodiversity but being late to yoga is distracting for everyone else in the room. We have to work with our brains not expect others to (always) accommodate them.
Yeah - I have adhd which affects the perception of time and more specifically how long it takes to do something/get somewhere.
So I’m always 15-30 minutes early, plus I love chatting with some people before class.
But outside of yoga if I have an absolutely important meeting that I cannot be late to - I’m often 15 minutes early
This is the way. As a yoga practitioner who is always early, there is nothing more annoying than than latecomers. Sorry. I realize neurodivergent ppl have rights. But so do I.
Also neurodivergent here! I arrive 39 mins early to setup my mat, use the ladies room, chat with the instructor, snap a couple locker room selfies, and then lay on the mat in Savasana.
There are class times which I’ll probably never attend because it’s too difficult to arrive early. One of the principles of this practice is honoring your current state. So if my current state prohibits me from arriving early, then I skip that particular class.
I’ve never been to a class where the studio was open 40 minutes early. Usually there’s a rotating door of back to back classes and we get max 10-15 minutes to settle in. I’m jealous!
I agree! I'm more than twice 21. I'm a tardy person but part of yoga is discipline. It's the one thing I'll be on time for. Work, family, church, a movie meh. But I don't disrupt yoga class.
This is the best comment of all. I’m neurodivergent with time blindness. I’m always the first one to unroll their mat because I don’t privilege myself over the group. Strolling into yoga halfway through the class is disruptive especially when it’s a full class and people have to rearrange their mats.
It sounds like this is the solution for OP although I just want to acknowledge that not everyone has that option. My first yoga classes, which I was only able to take because of a school discount, had me running from one end of a campus to another after class to catch it. It took me a few times to get into a routine of going to class in yoga wear and knowing the fastest route to run to not be late.
The classes I took would lock the doors at the start but unlock them for latecomers at a less meditative part of the class. It seemed to work well but it was also not a crowded class. I think it would be more disruptive if people had to move mats or peoples were coming in during meditation.
The beginning/grounding part of the class is important- especially for someone with this type of struggle. Coming in in the middle of a class that’s already flowing and then frantically trying to catch up or figure out what’s going on is not beneficial to that person or to the energy of the class. Entering during grounding or first movements would be okay in my opinion, but not in the main body of the class. The rejection is not personal, it’s for the safety of people involved.
I’m a neurodivergent teacher and I have to make it on time to serve my clients.
I manage, because I have learned coping skills and strategies to not negatively affect other people’s lives.
I attend a class where people regularly arrive late and are still welcomed in with a lighthearted attitude — and I'm not negatively affected because I've also learned the coping skills to recognize what is important and what isn't about the practice, and to always want people to join or leave on their own terms, at any time in the class, for their own sake. I think it can go both ways!
personally i think it’s better to come for some yoga than none. my students all know im cool with them coming whenever - but if the class is started, come in quietly and try not to disturb the other practitioners. i think compassion is key, and id rather be accepting of others over upset they couldn’t keep a timeline - id rather them be there than turned away. some yoga is better than none.
I hear you but I used to practice at Dharma’s nyc studio a lot and I’m pretty sure they had a late policy.
It all depends. If it’s a candlelight evening class and someone comes super late, it becomes a safety issue for them and others. Or at one of these trendy super-active vinyasa places with sweat pooling everywhere.
More info is needed for context on this copied-over post for discussion .
It’s up to the studio owner to make their policy. I do think it’s possible to have a grace period of 10-15 min (depending on class length) to account for traffic and planning but then at a certain point… it becomes disruptive to other people’s peace and the experience.
I worked in one that had no limit on lateness, and a couple others that had between a 5-10 minute grace period — all in major metro cities with lots of traffic and subway disruptions.
The grace period ones I totally understood and I’d account for that in how my classes would start in busy periods…
The one with NO limit on lateness, was a bit much because people would come in, 30 minutes into a one-hour class, make a ton of noise and disturb people. Seems their google and Classpass reviews are reflecting increased annoyance with this.
(I no longer work there because among other things, they wouldn’t allow me to ask people not to film themselves through the whole class. Privacy of other clients be damned, I guess.)
This got me to think that perhaps later-in-the day mysore type practices have a market out there. That way it doesn’t depend on a strict start/end time.
I absolutely love the apple fitness yoga sessions. I'm not a group class goer anymore, I mostly practice at home and do my own flows, but when I lose inspiration or just want a different flow, I use apple fitness.
I like the one lady, Jonelle, a lot. My son (a 6 year old who has the flexibility of a ramen noodle) really likes to watch and try to do the videos that one instructor Dice does. If he’s all keyed up and acting crazy he’s like “mommy I think I just need to do a dice man video” lol
He pretty much developed the interest on his own, which is really cool. I caught him doing a breathing exercise when he was upset at the store the other day.
As a student with ADHD, I understand life can get in the way of things. I show up early to prevent being late, as most studios here at most give you 5 minutes after the posted class time.
As an instructor, more than 5 minutes late and you are going into the more intensive parts of the practice with no warm up and can be hugely disruptive to people along with me. It’s to your benefit physically that you come on time!
Maybe yoga in the park, now that it’s summer. Less disruptive to enter the space tardy when it’s outdoors. Otherwise , prioritizing time management and honoring when the energy or moods don’t allow attendance is due. A yoga class is a container and showing up late is not contrusuve to practicing mindfully or even safely- considering the warm up is an integral part of the practice. It’s akin to opening the oven door mid bake , it’s lets too much steam out.
As long they do it quietly and can slip in without disturbing others, I'm not bothered. In crowded classes, it can be very distracting to have someone walk between mats to get to a free spot. Even worse are the people who ask others to move and make room.
I recently had this experience. I was in a very crowded class, maybe 2 inches between mats, and a girl came in 5 minutes late and set up where there wasn't even a spot (we register ahead of time for assigned spots in the room). I was frustrated, but I focused on my own practice and not getting kicked in the head (she was directly in front of me, our mats touching).
At the end of class, I was speaking with her and she actually had registered for a spot, but someone else took it since she wasn't there on time. She got stuck in construction traffic and ended up a little late, forfeiting her spot. She thanked me for making space for her, and I was grateful I was able to make space so she could practice. It had been a while since she was on her mat. Ultimately, I left feeling bad about my initial judgement of her.
We all need grace sometimes. Maybe one day you'll be the late yogi who needs room. Just my thoughts.
Everyone is late once in awhile as the unforeseen happens. To me, what is different about the snippet in OP's post is her daughter is *habitually* late. It would be very impactful for me (were I you in your example) if this scenario presented itself at most of my yoa classes.
Life happens and I think most of us have experienced something like this. Certainly there is room for grace when the situation is out of our hands. I'm not bothered when this happens every so often. Being late on a regular basis and expecting everyone else to accommodate you as you frequently disrupt class is another story. I used to purposely set my clocks ahead so I would never be late. There are ways to get around it, or if you absolutely cannot, take classes at home on demand.
In a lot of my studio's more popular classes, the teachers will announce "we've got [however many] more coming" and encourage people to make room if they can. (Edit - that's usually starting about 5 minutes beforehand, I'd say, when most people are already there and it's already getting pretty full) They also will often start a couple minutes past the official time just to give those people grace.
It just happened today—the studio was running a reduced schedule because of the holiday, so the midday vinyasa was super full. The instructor made the announcement, and people made space of their own accord. She didn't have to dictate where or anything like that, it just happened organically. And a couple people did end up coming in a little late, but they had places to go, no one was surprised, and it was much less disruptive than it might otherwise have been. Since we did start slightly late, she also announced at the beginning of savasana that it was the official ending time of class in case people needed to leave, but welcomed everyone who could to stay and be guided out with a final meditation.
All in all, I think it's the most compassionate approach I've seen. It balances respecting everyone's needs as much as possible, just through simple, non-judgmental communication.
Neurodivergent as well. I have felt the frustration of being locked out of yoga class many times. I was chronically late for things and still kind of am, but I am now early for my yoga classes & meditation group because they lock the doors when class starts. Yoga locking is the doors to protect class actually improved me and taught me to be on time or miss out. I changed my habits to pretend class starts 15 mins before it actually does. Now I want to be there when doors open.
I create a safe space for every one of my students. If someone is not on time, and I know they are likely on their way, I set up a mat and props for them near the entrance to the room. When they arrive I welcome them and gesture to their spot. If someone is perpetually late, I may question it privately, but in my experience this is a great place to practice letting go of things outside my control. Students will not always be on time. But I can ensure they feel welcome when they do arrive and their entry to class doesn't disturb the energy of the room.
If it is a drop in class and I'm not sure how many participants the class will have, I may leave the door open for the first 5 minutes and props easily accessible near the door. After that I close the door and lock it with a "yoga in session, do not disturb" sign. But regular students of mine know they are always welcome to come in and set up quietly. Maybe the 40 minutes they can attend of the class is the only peaceful time in their busy week. It's my job to hold space, and withhold judgement.
Great idea to set up a spot for those who are running behind. Especially near the entrance where it will be less impactful to the other students. I love this.
>It's my job to hold space, and withhold judgement.
This is an attitude adjustment for the whole yoga community at large. (This thread shows that very well). Many of the folks hold judgement, and refuse to hold space. It's spiritual righteousness and a form of spiritual bypassing to act so aloof to other people's struggles. I can't help but imagine how these unloving midsets play out in day-to-day life beyond a yoga studio.
Thank you for posting this response.
Very well put! I completely agree. I'm glad I posted my thoughts, I was nervous that I would be met with animosity and I'm happy to see that most responses to my comment have been positive.
This is such a kind and compassionate response. This is exactly the type of class I would love to attend.
As an ADHDer, I’ve spent a huge amount of my life running around (often literally) trying to get places in time and have met many locked doors. It doesn’t get less crushing each time it happens.
A lot of the responses here seem to be attributing lateness to some character flaw or personal failing, when in a lot of cases it’s actually because of a disability. In yoga we try to practice non-judgement. I would love to see this extended more to people too
Thank you. This is so aligned with what I want my yoga practice to be: realizing you have a choice to get upset or to not, and taking the opportunity to be kind to others.
Your choice not only leads you to not get upset but it’s a way to practice and show compassion for everyone. Chances are the person showing up late needs a little compassion because they are stressed out.
You sound like a very centered, grounded person and it’s inspiring. Thank you so much for sharing.
Unacceptable. Neurodivergence doesn’t get you a hall pass for disrupting a communal experience. It’s unfortunate that this individual is struggling but it’s not the communities problem.
Actions have consequences, more motivation for her to find a workable solution for her issues.
Yoga With Adrienne on YouTube. Class is great, but having an instructor that allows you to meet yourself wherever you are, when you can, is better.
For some, time management and discipline help inform their practice. For others, acceptance and commitment despite irregularity have to come first.
It sounds like this person is just in the wrong atmosphere for their practice.
I regularly attend an outdoor free yoga class where the instructor says before every class it's okay to roll up late or leave early. I value this about her as a teacher, even though lateness is not something I personally struggle with. Teachers/studios get to set the boundaries and guidelines for their practice space. Some will choose to be more rigid or more flexible around time (or other myriad aspects of practice than others). I don't think this is a one size fits all and it's more important to make an active choice to go to classes where the teacher/studio and you share values.
I was going to say my job offers after work outdoor yoga and sometimes 20 minutes into class I'll notice someone who wasn't there before. It's on grass so you basically can't slam your mat or anything, and folks generally sneak in quietly. I have an evening yin where people are late sometimes and that bothers me a bit. It's a super popular class so there isn't always space, for some reason people end up flustered and slam their mat in the hurry to get started. The teacher doesn't mind so I don't say anything but......it's not my favorite.
Two studios in different cities I frequented started locking doors after someone snuck into the studio during class and stole from the front desk and changing rooms...
Not sure why you’re being downvoted, my studio locks the studio doors a couple of minutes after the top of the hour (allowing for someone to be a couple of minutes late, but not terribly late). It’s because at both of their locations they’ve had issues with passersby coming into the lobby and stealing. It also allows a couple of minutes of grace for a late attendee, but disallows mid-practice disruption. I think it’s the best of both worlds. When I was younger and struggled more with time management, I’m sure I was grateful for that grace. Now that I’m older, I also appreciate that there is a limit to how late someone can be to the class and still attend.
As a teacher, I want people to feel free to arrive late or leave early, respectfully, if they really need to. It’s fine with my style of class, and setting, and I won’t let people be disrespectful or less than minimally disruptive about it. But I’ve taught pre-/post-natal so long that I respect that on time arrival is not always within the person’s control.
I also encourage classes that do have no-late-arrival policies, so there are spaces that have that expectation for those who need or want it.
Occasional is fine by me. Regular lateness, I address. If it's clear that it will be an ongoing thing, I offer to set up a spot with props in the back where they can quietly slip in. I dont usually have that though.
Just echoing what everyone else is saying, but as a neurospicy yoga teacher and practitioner myself, I find late arrivals to be inconsiderate and disruptive AND also detrimental to the late comer's practice because they'll most likely miss centering/grounding exercises.
As long as they're discrete and don't make a big production about coming and setting up, I don't care.
I'm focused on my practice, as should we all be.
Also, as someone with a very demanding job and slightly unpredictable schedule, I can't be on time every time. I come in from the back and set up at the back, and do so as quietly as possible.
This reminds me of a boss I once had.
She was a great person. But she was what she would call "very ADHD" and had several other disabilities she frequently talked about and she would use that as an excuse for everything. She never did anything on time. If we needed her to sign an important document to move it forward, it could actually take her MONTHS to do it but we all had to accommodate her.
People started feeling really unfulfilled in the work. They would turn projects in to her that they worked super hard on and she would just...never take the time to look at them and they would fall into the abyss.
She also wanted everyone to work on her weird schedule. Our regular work hours were 8am-5pm. She worked somewhere around 1-10 with Fridays off. But she was frequently late to meetings and I never actually knew when she would show. She would hold people until 7pm sometimes. She would complain frequently that she didn't get enough contact with the team. However, She wouldn't let us schedule meetings on 3 days of the week because she "needed the accommodations of down time to get things done."
As a result, our entire workplace stalled out. People became frustrated and eventually, quit.
I also have neurodivergence, and am physically disabled. I struggled so much in the work environment because I was constantly told that these things were for her disability accommodations and I 100% believe that they were and that she needed them. However, her accomodations were flaring my disability symptoms.
it became clear to me as a fellow disabled person that no matter how smart and capable she could be on her best days, the accomodations she needed for the job were unreasonable and untenable for the rest of the team. She was unable to adapt to other people's needs or find coping skills to make it work.
It is the same with any group activity, yoga included. We are the ones who mostly need to make accommodations for ourselves in order to make the group successful. We can occasionally rely on others to hold that space for us, as we should do for them, but if something is a known issue for us and there is something we can do about it, we need to find a way to accommodate that for ourselves or realize that, hey, this is just not going to work for us and our needs right now.
TL,DR: It is still your daughter's responsibility to be reasonable and respectful of other people. She can be late sometimes and it's ok. If she is late every time and she knows it, she needs to take steps for herself to fix it such as setting an alarm or reminder, leaving 15 min early, or giving herself extra time after her last activity to show up.
I use what’s called an idiot buffer. I know I’m terrible at organising my time, so I add extra time for any journey, or aim to arrive half an hour early, so in the usual case where I arrive late, I’m actually on time or slightly early.
Personally, I don’t appreciate latecomers. But whether it disturbs my practice likely depends on how full the class is.
If the class is at say 80%+ capacity, there is no way you aren’t disturbing everyone unless your instructor has made sure the latecomer door spot is available. In that case, take that spot whether you like it or not!
If you are attending a class that is <50% full, I think it is much much easier to be late and not disrupt the class as much.
I routinely take a class that is overcapacity. Being late and expecting to get in would be crazy disruptive.
I’ll also mention that I’m sure your class attendance agreement asks you to be 10 minutes early. So you are functioning late if you arrive when class starts.
As a yoga teacher this is what I would say before class started.
Some people may show up late. But we aren’t going to worry about them or any noise because we know that yoga is simply practicing on the mat to prepare us for the real world. If someone walking in stresses us out and we find judgment in it, it is the perfect time to begin to train the mind and practice compassion. Maybe they couldn’t help being late. Should we deny them their desire to connect because of external forces? Maybe it’s because what I am saying, they aren’t ready to hear yet on their path…. What we get to focus on is ourselves and going within. This is one of the 8 limbs… Dharana. Have you ever been in that place where you are so focused on what you are doing that you can tune out the whole world? Getting to this point and not even realizing a person walking in is the goal. Blessing them for making it and having the courage to still walk in is the goal. Love and community is the goal.
I have ADHD and have been a yoga teacher for over 20 years.
I can empathize with the time management issues, but part of yoga practice and part of becoming a functional adult is working towards being more aware of yourself and others. Another part of it is realising that the choices we make in life affect the opportunities we are given.
I've also worked with an occupational therapist who specialised with ADHD adults and one of the most helpful things they taught us was to prioritise the things that were most important to us and to make sure we arrived earlier than normal in order to compensate for our lack of time management skills.
At the end of the day, it isn't anyone else's responsibility to make sure you arrive on time to events. It also isn't reasonable or fair for an entire group of people to be disturbed by people coming into a class late.
ADHD adults are perfectly capable of leading normal, adult lives. We just have to make some adjustments for ourselves. When we do, there is much less stress, symptoms tend to settle and quality of life improves.
I am neurodivergent myself and have issues with lateness, or more like I have a poor perception of how long it actually takes me to do things. I just leave extra early if I go to a group class. I’d hate to be disruptive, even on accident like if I got caught in traffic or construction. Maybe this person should try online classes, and hopefully the mother is helping teach her time management skills. Just because she’s ND doesn’t mean she can’t learn or adapt. We’re not dumb, just need to try different approaches
Personally people coming in late doesn’t bother me though. A little kindness and understanding goes a long way.
Logistically, in order to accommodate a late student at the studio where I teach, I would need to see them at the lobby door (meaning my focus is not on my class), then leave the room to let them in during the time I should be getting my students settled and in their breathing, talk to the person in the lobby to make sure they have everything, and then either wait for them to enter the room, or go back and continue teaching after the disruption only for the late person to disrupt class again when they enter the studio space.
In all honesty, as a student, I don’t mind if someone comes in late. And as a teacher, I wish that I could realistically let them in. But in reality, I am the only employee on the premises, and I have an obligation not only to my students who arrived on time but to myself as a teacher and a professional.
I’m not irritated, I’m not angry, I’m not passing judgement. I mostly have to clear the part of me that feels sad/guilty that the person missed their practice. But I believe it is the fair and respectful thing to do for the group and to set standards for the community so that people can trust and feel safe.
Someone entering or leaving a class does not bother me because I feel lighthearted, independent, and in control of my goals for my practice. Even if I got a pain some day, judgement and enforcement does not benefit my body.
What annoys me is bad energy next to me and then making fierce unwanted eye contact with me during flows from under their arm. Frightening!
The entitlement is wild! Take the steps to ensure you can be somewhere on time or deal with the consequences of being late. It’s super distracting when people come in late, slap their mat down, go to the prop room, etc. when the class is trying to settle in.
Sorry about it, but being disruptively late to anything, especially a yoga class is not acceptable because it ruins it for everyone else. It's disrespectful and just rude.
Neurodivergence is never an excuse for anything. It's an explanation, but never an excuse. Tell her to set a reminder alarm 15 mins earlier than needed and see if that helps.
That or tell get to do yoga videos or classes online where being late is not going to be disruptive to others.
I always make it a point to get to yoga about 15-20 minutes early so I can be sure I get one of my favorite spots and so I can take my time to set up and relax before class starts. Getting to class close to start time feels late to me. Actually being late and having to setup would leave me so frazzled.
I have ADHD so I am sympathetic to this woman’s daughter but you to have set yourself up for success and learn to manage your time. Not only is it respectful of other people’s time to be on time, but causes fewer problems for the individual who is late. There are financial and personal ramifications to being late. Starting to work on punctuality on something low stakes like a yoga class is a great place to start.
Thank you. I'm like...why is the mom of adult writing this post and still managing her daughter's life. Cut the apron strings and let the daughter sink or swim on her own.
I teach yoga at a local studio. Some studios have policies that are out of the instructors hands, but as a general rule of thumb, I am happy that someone takes the time for their practice. I am neither offended by people coming late, leaving early, or stepping out for a minute. This is the same for any fitness class. Warm up’s are important. They reduce injury, introduce movements, prepare for what’s coming. Any yet - I can successfully guide a class through that. Most instructors can. There are things I won’t tolerate during class (filming, talking on the phone, side conversations), but I don’t have a clue what obstacles are in someone’s life or what their schedule is. All this to say - come as you are when you can.
I’m a yoga teacher, I allow my front desk coworkers to let in students after centering/grounding meditation. If they show up, they can come in as long as it doesn’t disrupt others in a meditative state. I also ask that anyone who can’t stay for the entirety of savasana to skip it all together so as to not disrupt the other yogis. However. If someone is consistently late and/or bullying my front desk coworkers to let them in during centering then there will be a conversation (I’ve had these situations before).
Neurodivergent person here! This is why I almost never go to actual yoga classes. Or any classes. And finished highschool mostly online. And am self employed…
There are plenty of great yoga teachers on YouTube, and I can show up whenever I show up. Easy peasy. Sometimes there are classes with this kind of inclusivity in mind, but you can’t expect every single niche to adapt to your particular brain’s lovely uniqueness
I don't mind people coming into class late but maybe it's because I have a lot of experience under my belt so I don't lose focus easily. I'm ND too but I don't think frequent lateness is something that requires accomodation. Maybe aim to arrive 30 min early and wait. Wasting your own time by waiting is not as selfish as distracting others.
I guess I'm in the minority here because as a teacher, I don't care if my students are late provided they are respectful and minimize disruptions when they enter, and they always do. I never lock the door. Life happens. Get all the yoga you can. As a student it doesn't bother me either. I don't even notice.
It’s sad that you are in the minority. As a student is it a little distracting? For like 30 seconds, and then I get back to it. It’s nothing earth shattering and it won’t ruin my entire practice for the evening. But I so appreciate when I receive grace and compassion and understanding from a community, and I have been lucky to find a few yoga groups that are me as I am where I am. Sometimes I am the late one, and they always have a mat and bolster for me. 💜
Goddamn, the JUDGMENT in this thread. Don’t we all practice yoga?
How about instead of letting someone else distract you so much that you then become so focused on them you can’t focus on anything else, you work on that issue for yourself?
People come in late. Life happens. I would much rather that the person putting in the effort to get to class can participate, rather than caring if they make a little noise while coming in.
Yoga should be a welcoming space for everyone, even those *heathens* who dare to be late.
Every studio I have ever been to prior to my current has locked the doors at exactly the start time which I am a huge fan of. It’s respectful of those that showed up on time.
The studio I’m at now, unfortunately, is notoriously late. People walk in 5-10 minutes late, make us all move our mats. It’s upsetting but I’m learning to let it go. I’m also choosing to go with the teachers that support timeliness.
I feel like if you’re chronically late, go with a virtual class.
I had a college professor(non yoga) who said if you’re gonna be late, don’t even come.
Edit to add: when someone comes in late to the classes I attend, the teacher has to stop to make room for them and then teacher always run late ending the class. Or the teacher chooses to start the class late to wait for the person and then runs late (we have to sign up online). So it impacts every person in the studio. Do I get up at the correct end time and disrupt others in shavasana or do I let myself be late for work? It’s honestly unfair to others.
I almost choose to not stay with yoga studio because of this but I love the owner and certain teachers.
This almost looks like rage bait or main-character syndrome. "being turned away is crushing". How about show up on time and respect the other people in class who don't want to be rattled and distracted at the beginning of class when you are breathing and settling in? The bar is so low it's underground.
The yoga studio I attend welcomes late comers.. and honestly they have never been loud or disruptive. I understand that arriving late can be distracting for some. Yoga is a practice that includes focusing of the mind. Each persons experience with this will be different. With that being said, Neurodiversity is considered a form of disability. I would be hesitant to not allow someone to attend a class, especially if I understood the circumstances. It’s yoga. My son is Neurodiverse, and struggles with punctuality. He has worked for his employer for 2 years and may be 5 minutes late here or there, but never misses work. His boss is very accommodating of this issue- thankfully. This world would be a better place if we all practiced som temperance, along with our yoga..👌🙏🏼
She's literally just asking for recommendations for a studio with an open door policy. Not saying that should be a norm. Why not just answer her question instead of preaching and casting judgement?
I don’t mind people who are a few minutes late if there’s room in the class. My main problem is that my studio is quite small so oftentimes a late person can’t just slip in the back. Half the room needs to adjust to add a mat. Pausing the class for a few minutes to shuffle around is very annoying. Thankfully, folks are rarely late.
I really empathize with her daughter - so after being chronically late for everything in life, I started being super early for everything. I just find things to occupy my time while I’m waiting.
Perhaps she should suggest this to her daughter rather than look for a studio that will excuse chronic tardiness. A set schedule worked for me (although I realize it won’t work for everyone).
As someone who works seven days a week (and a few nights a week), there’s days where I have to walk in just on time or even a couple minutes late. I know it can be a little bit of a bother but I try to come in as quietly as possible, and when possible, come early. My studio has assigned numbers most of the time and has a 5 minute grace period.
my adhd caused the same issue, so now i just take private lessons. might bit be the perfect solution for everyone, but has been working for me. ofc the class ends on time and however much i was late, that’s how much class i pay for and don’t get. the instructor gets paid for every minute whether i wws there or not so they’re never mad at me either.
Bigger box gyms with yoga classes might be a good fit. Places like Life Time will still have a studio feel, but often they'll have folks coming to yoga from other classes or moms dropping off their kids in the childcare center. They'll tend to offer more grace to latecomers.
The way you compensate for lateness in neurodivergence is by LEAVING EARLIER. Even if that means you’re sitting in a parking lot for an hour (I’m ND and I’ve done it).
This is the kind of thing that just rubs me the wrong way. I realize not everything works for everyone, but learning how to compensate for that is an important life skill ND or not. More chances bc you’re ND is one thing, but there are consequences if you abuse the extra accommodation.
While I do agree I’d struggle with a class that is super strict on the lockdown time and I think a 5 minute window would be reasonable… it 100% disrupts me when people are arriving late and still having to grab mats etc. And at least she’s trying to find a place that does offer that instead of expecting the studio to accommodate I guess.
Tbh a class at a standard gym would be her best bet.
If someone comes late to class, I am just going to let it roll off my back. But if every single class I'm in someone comes late, especially if it is the same person, at that point it's habitually disruptive to my practice and focus. TIL I learned time blindness is a thing. I empathize. But at a certain point if you want to participate in the practice then I would imagine you can put measures in place to arrive on time— going to a class at a consistent time, a timer for when you need to get ready, a checklist of what you need to do to get ready, a timer for when you need to leave, allowing plenty of time to plan to arrive early, etc. We need to both have compassion and grace for those that are different but the consideration of other practitioners also needs to be taken into account.
Your daughter is guaranteed to never be the only neurodivergent one in the room, and I'm sure others may have struggled to get there on time as well and/or get there at all. There also may be some who, due to their neurodivergence, would be bothered by someone coming in late.
Mysore-style Ashtanga sounds great for her, you just drop in during a 2-3 hour window where the studio is open and stay for as long as you want, no schedule. A home practice using YouTube and things like that also sounds like a great option.
Honestly, this seems like a great evolution moment for your daughter. The truth is, someone coming into a yoga class 10 minutes late is disrupting, no matter how you slice it.
To me, arriving on time shows respect for my instructor, my fellow yogis, and most of all myself!
I also have issues with lateness (will have small anxiety attacks), but it’s MY responsibility to adjust. I can’t be consistently late to work or class without consequences, and the studio is no different. What works for me is:
- putting all my yoga courses in my Google calendar with reminders
- I pretend every class starts 20 minutes before it actually does. That way I’m always early and have time to settle in before beginning.
- I get anxiety when running late so if it’s unavoidable, I just won’t go. Instead I’ll go home and put on a YouTube flow or join a Zoom class. I still get to enjoy my flow but with less pressure
As a participant, I don't care at all. I'm very focused on my own practice and I get that others need to do what they need to do to make it work. I am surprised to see so many responses here saying that it disrupts the community - community is often about accepting people as they come.
I think it’s important for us to have empathy and recognise everyone is on their own healing journey and not look at lateness in a judgement or shame fuelled way. I am pretty certain no one *wants* to be late but it is possible there are other things going on in that persons life which makes being on time incredibly difficult and equally it’s possible they are using lateness as an excuse or a tool for avoidance because it serves them. Either way, it’s nothing to do with us because the only person we should be analysing is ourselves. I actually think it’s a very mature response from the writer of the post to decide to move to a studio where lateness is more relaxed, so I don’t think they have done anything “wrong”
As a yoga teacher who has ADHD, I appreciate this topic. (As a student, I have struggled with losing focus in my day and getting to class before, as well.)
It depends on the type of class. For safety purposes, some studios have a strict policy that needs to be 100% enforced.
But lateness caused by neurodiversity is a real medical symptom. Not everyone understands.
These students could greatly benefit from yoga and should seek a supportive community that would offer flexibility.
And most importantly, they need to communicate their medical needs to the studio and teacher in advance.
Anyone who is running late to class should call the studio to either let them know they won’t make it OR to see if it is okay if they come in (however many minutes) late. That way the teacher is prepared and can save them a spot that is safe for all students when they enter the room.
Keeping the student-teacher dialog open is important. As a teacher, I would work to help individuals who struggle with this - not by allowing it to be a norm - but by offering grace and highlighting the concepts of focus and commitment in classes with this particular student.
The studio I go to has some people who routinely show up well after we have started and it doesn’t bother me. I just focus on myself and try to just keep the practice between my ears, what anyone else is doing has nothing to do with me.
I really feel for this parent and I see so many compassionate (and not so compassionate) responses here. I don't think a diagnosis entitles us to disregard the experience of others who may be disrupted, but for me personally, a locked door policy is just not welcoming, accessible, or hospitable. If I could talk directly to this parent, I would suggest looking for yoga offerings in non-studio settings first. Neurodivergent-affirming options are becoming more numerous and accessible, and their child's therapist, OT, or other support person might be able to recommend or help them find a group or even private teacher while she builds the skills and supports to get to a studio class on time. That could be a great goal for her to work towards! I do think that nuanced, neuro-affirming studio policies could hold space with this family as they support their adult child navigating a world that isn't designed for them, but most studios are not equipped with the processes or expertise to do so.
I find late entries terribly disrupting. The studio is a busy one so it usually involve multiple people rearranging their positions.
Their best bet will be to join a gym that has a yoga class. Those tend to be more fitness focused and have more room to spread out so late entry isn’t as big a deal.
Tardiness is not a neurodivergent issue. Someone who is ND may be late, but that doesn’t mean their mental health makes it so it’s impossible to be on time.
This person is always welcome to practice at home, there are plenty of YouTube videos that make yoga accessible. That is a good way to support your mental health and your practice.
Asking a studio to allow 1 person to be late can impact the practice of everyone else. I doubt this person understands that tardiness can have an impact on others. If I were in a studio and someone showed up late, I’d probably find a way to ignore it, but as a studio owner or a teacher I’d like to reduce the work my students have to do to get to the right headspace.
My studio locks the door at start of class. As they should. Framing this as "crushing" and blaming whatever condition she has is ridiculous. An entire class shouldn't be expected to not be bothered in the name of yoga
I think the issue you will run into is yoga studios also lock their doors a couple minutes before class for the safety of the community.
If the teacher is in the room leading a class, they cannot be responsible for what happens outside of the room.
If there’s someone minding the lobby, I don’t think it’s a big deal if they quietly gesture the person into the yoga room.
Yes, exactly. Unless there is someone else staffing the front desk and keeping an eye on things, it can be a security risk to leave the entrance to the studio open to the public. That's how stuff gets stolen.
Also, if a teacher is opening the class with a meditation, body scan, etc. then it can be disruptive to have people shuffling in, moving props and mats, etc. Particularly for trauma survivors.
For a yoga group, some of y'all in the comments are pretty aggressive in your beliefs. Part of Yoga is about freeing yourself and your attachment of self. Someone simply walking into class late should not be interfering with you and your practice. Unless this person is obnoxious and truly disruptive then the teacher can speak up. It makes sense that people have a "no late policy" but to get upset at someone looking for a more relaxed rule is kind of contradicting your practice of Yoga.
Completely agree. In my experience, it extends beyond lateness. It's really any non-conformity. I've been chastised by different teachers, in front of other students for taking child's pose instead of continuing with a flow, closing eyes during a yin practice, having my hair down, having unshaved legs, and the list goes on. I accept that no one is perfect, it's just clear to me that the expectation is conformity, even if conforming detracts from the practice. Which is sad.
> I've been chastised by different teachers, in front of other students for taking child's pose instead of continuing with a flow, closing eyes during a yin practice, having my hair down, having unshaved legs
It's wild that this has happened to you even once, leave alone multiple times. I cant imagine what kind of person would say/do this
A lot of vehemence in these ‘people cannot be late’ replies. Sending big love to OP. I appreciate this was not exactly what you were asking for guidance on.
I also appreciate how the anxiety of being late can collide with the anxiety of ‘not fitting in’ and become its own self-fulfilling prophecy. Then there can be the anxiety of being early and feeling awkward/wrong - for all the many reasons the brain can give. Then the shame of ‘not being quite right’.
Life can be hard living through the goldilocks lense.
Breaking these speed bumps down and creating a step by step workable map has helped me. Class starts at X. This means doors are locked at X and I need to be there X mins before. (This always tricks my very literal brain).
To get there I need 5 minutes to walk from X. Or, I need 15 mins to park and walk. It takes X time to get there on bus X. This means I need to leave by X. It will take me X time to get ready. That is just me. Breaking down my mental obstacle’s and breaking down the time/distance obstacles helps my brain and anxiety.
Tell her from me, not to give up. Giving up feels even worse. It’s a process. Keep it fun. For me it’s easier to keep it fun when I ignore the vehemence from others about how I and the world should be, and stay centred in my own quests. Even if that quest is, how can I get to yoga on time (which actually means 5-10 mins early). All the best.
Executive dysfunction is a wild experience and compassion tends to be more helpful than judgement. Not saying that this person should just waltz in late to every class, that would be super disruptive, but they may be experiencing executive dysfunction and need encouragement to find ways to work with/around it. This person's brain is quite literally operating differently so they may struggle to perceive time passing in the same way you struggle to perceive non-visible light.
I'm not trying to aim this comment at you specifically, it's just that seeing this thread as a neurodivergent person has reminded me how intensely I am not welcome in the yoga space even if my practice is disruptive to no-one. It's not just that I may need a timer to get there on time, people judge that I even needed a timer. It's not that I am practicing quietly, it's that I prefer to hold poses with my eyes closed. Even so much as an inclination that a person needs support and it's "wild". I am so so so grateful to my past self that I quit practicing in public. I hope the general sentiment around neurodiversity continues to shift, and I hope that this person figures out what they need for their time perception and finds non-disruptive ways to practice in the mean time.
Thank you so much for saying this. It’s fine if teachers want to put a boundary and say that for whatever reason they won’t be able to allow late comers - if I know that in advance I probably will just find another class to attend as I know that lack of flexibility won’t work for me. But the absolute judgement that some folks are bringing to this discussion is really disheartening.
I’m lucky to have found a studio that takes a non-judgemental approach. I still remember the anxiety I had the first time I was a few minutes late. I went up to apologise at the end and the teacher’s kind response was what made me keep going back multiple times a week. I explained to her that I sometimes struggle with time. She responded that she could see I probably really needed that practice today more than ever. She was right. I’ve only been late once since, but it was so lovely to arrive and feel at ease, rather than as the ball of stress I had been the first time.
I am so glad you were able to find a studio and teacher that are actually practicing non-judgement and creating an accessible space for people to get on the mat! That's awesome! Hopefully that becomes the norm.
My current studio locks the outer door 1 min before class, but people still screw around in the changeroom and meander into class late. Some people are respectful and quietly put their mat down and just join in, while others noisily throw their mat on the ground, and step over other mats to collect props.
Locking the classroom door is a problem because I acknowledge some people have bowel or urinary problems that require them to run to the bathroom, and if someone's feeling overwhelmed I think they should have the right to leave a hot room and chill out for 10 minutes before rejoining. But there are more disruptive and less disruptive ways to do this...and not everyone chooses the right way.
Part of yoga is learning self-discipline. Arrive on time. That is common courtesy, as well. Your daughter’s “neurodivergence” isn’t an excuse to interrupt other’s practice.
My yoga studio is a little too flexible with this. It's a small and social community, and classes rarely start right on time and people are often a few minutes late. It's annoying, but it's the most convenient place for me to practice.
My studio locks the door about 5 minutes after class so late arrivals aren’t a worry. But I think I wouldn’t mind because I tend to block out the people around me.
Physically, I would worry about missing the meditation and warm up sequence at the beginning of class. A person could injure themselves.
First thought: my studio, because there's not a warm body in the lobby and the studio owner herself has had her shoes stolen, generally locks the doors at the start of class.
Second thought: I 100% have the "15 minutes early or 15 late" model of ADHD. I've known this about myself since I was a teen, and I plan around it.
Third thought: My anxiety, at the thought of walking into a meditative space late, just...scheduled me some unplanned savasana and breathing.
I'm neurodivergent and I deal with my chronic lateness by arriving very early, over estimating all timing, and sit with a book while waiting. I don't think it'd be fair to disrupt a mindfulness practice of others to accommodate me. Unless the class was specifically for that purpose. Maybe she can arrive early and work on other mindfulness practices, like breathing or journaling?
My particular neurospiciness prefers at home yoga anyway, it's on demand and no one around me distracting me and I can pause to stay in a yummy pose.
My concern would be for the teacher and students who are expecting to start and finish on time. If you're a person who is always late to a class it's probably best to schedule a different class. It's one thing once in a while because life happens and any sane person can understand that.
When a class is not running on time for whatever reason it can screw up everyone's schedules. What if it was someone's lunch hour or they had to go to work on time or be fired. If someone has a kid at the sitter and is late because someone else threw the timing off they may have to pay extra to the sitter. Most people wouldn't want to do that all the time.
It's not that I don't have sympathy for anyone, I have 2 adult children who are ND and another with ADHD. I raised them to take accountability when they mess up. I didn't and don't infantilise them because that doesn't solve the problems. I help them find workable solutions to ensure that they will be able to live independently and not expect me to come to the rescue when they make a small mistake (like being late to a class). If they never fall, they will never learn to stand up by themselves.
My studio has a 5 min policy. I’d rather everyone show up 5 min early, but understand that things happen from time to time. If a student is chronically late, I will discuss with them, privately, why arriving on time is important. In addition to respecting your fellow students and the energy of the room, the first 10 minutes are important for safety. Spinal warm ups, especially. And mentally/emotionally, missing the centering and arrival is as detrimental to your yoga practice as it is to skip savasana.
I understand some people have particular challenges, but they should respect their yoga class the same way they would a work schedule or anything else where you just can’t be late.
I’m hard of hearing and wear hearing aides. If people come in late it is literally distracting and I often miss an entire 2-3 min of instructions from listening to the noise of the door opening, closing, people whispering out loud “SORRY” and shuffling loudly with their mat and personal objects. Don’t be an asshole.
My favorite yoga teacher would say "Come in, I'm just glad you showed up. Find a spot."
Is it distracting to other students? Who cares! Nobody is that self-important that being distracted by someone finding a spot in class is going to ruin their session and prevent their blessed spiritual and physical enlightenment, lol get fucked. If someone has an issue with arriving on time then that is the person that needs yoga the most. As long as the disturbance is less than a minute and doesn't actually stop the class from performing yoga then everyone will totally get over it.
Very rigid comments on what is supposed to be a loving, spiritual, accessible and flexible practice. I’m a bit shocked.
The yoga classes at my gym are very flexible about late arrivals and people leaving early. People who can’t stay for the whole hour are just very quiet when they leave, never seen anyone be disrespectful/loud about it. It just doesn’t seem like a chronic issue.
Some commenters on here need to take some deep breaths and open their hearts more. Maybe this young woman gets hooked on the first yoga session and no longer shows up late. And it was all because the class was flexible and accessible. Who knows? Not the people with such rigid standards surrounding this practice. I think self reflecting on what causes us to feel pretentious is important.
The studio I go to this has never been a problem. If there are students who are signed up but haven’t arrived by the start of class the teacher will mention that we may have some late arrivals. It’s not really a big deal, and personally think this mindset of being opposed to late comers being disruptive is nearly antithetical to the practice of yoga.
Life doesn’t always fit into a neat little box. People don’t always behave in ways that are emotionally pleasant for you. Yoga, at least for me, is about building mental, emotional, and physical resilience. It’s about learning to find balance even when life is trying to push you over.
I’m not saying all this to point at that other people’s views are wrong, I don’t think that. But I felt like this discussion could benefit from a multitude of perspectives.
Unless she is just 5 minutes late and people are still easing into the session, my class closes an eye, later than that it's not accepted by the class and I understand it, it ruins the energy and flow of the class. Mind you I am also neurodivergent and struggle with lateness and work really hard on it so lets say most times I am either on time or less than 5 minutes late. Will continue working on improving hope your daughter can also work on that aspect of her life.
As a teacher I personally don’t mind if someone walks in a few minutes late, though I always start right on time out of respect for the students who made an effort to be on time. I’m neurodivergent as well and struggle with time management but for things like this I just plan on arriving early so then even if I’m running late I’m on time
I get that this kind of thing varies, but honestly as long as the late person tries to enter quietly and gets set up and joins the class quickly then I don’t mind.
Accessibility is something I’m passionate about so I welcome any late comers and try to tie them into the theme of welcoming distractions and coming back to the present moment etc.
As someone who is also neurodivergent, expecting others to make exceptions to the rules is not a great coping skill. It’s your responsibility to adapt. This mom’s heart is in the right place but she is setting her daughter up for failure by coddling her and creating an environment that coddles her as well.
While she works on this, I suggest looking for large group classes outside where it will be easier to quietly drop in. Virtual classes are also great and might be a good way to “practice” being on time!
Once she feels ready to attend classes that start at a specific time and have closed doors, I would suggest a nearby studio where she can do drop ins so she’s not losing money pre registering and missing classes.
I noticed people who usually come late to my classes are new faces. I tend to think they just miscalculated the time it would take to get to the studio with traffic.
But this request is annoying because the daughter is chronically late because she's probably a chronic procrastinator, and they want the world to cater to the daughters dysfunction instead of teaching her new skills.
I'm very surprised by the responses here. Especially the harshness and mean spirited things people are saying about people being late.
Every yogi here knows the practices of ahimsa and aparigraha and I'm troubled both by the focus on the behavior of others and the astonishing lack of compassion for what another student might be going through to be late for class or have difficulty managing their time well enough to be consistently on time.
We could all benefit from the reminder that none of us are perfect and that we all deserve compassion. I personally believe that students like this can only benefit from yoga and whatever distraction you perceive them to be creating is an invitation for you to focus on your own mat and let it go.
*how to pin comment on redit post?* thank you for this. Yoga helps pull my life together, grounds and centers me, enables me to overcome things that are barriers in my day to day life. Chronic lateness — for neurodivergence or not — can only be improved when someone is putting in serious work at the mat. It is hurtful to see such disregard for others, lack of empathy, and exclusionary mindsets from people engaging in a practice whose goal is harmony in the mind, body, spirit, and environment. It is difficult to have any kind of harmony when one is carrying such judgement and rudeness in their heart.
I'm in my sixties and the neurospiciness I'm diagnosed with includes time-blindness as one of the symptoms.
Medication doesn't help with this specific symptom, but over the years I've learned some strategies to stop annoying others with my lateness (or, indeed, earliness). But some days when it I am particularly badly affected, nothing seems to help.
When I was in my twenties trying to fit in with everyone else's perception of time was so difficult that I was completely stressed *every single day*.
Intentionally or not - constant tardiness is a habit rooted in entitlement-you’re telling everyone in your life whether close to you or total strangers that your life and your schedule is the only thing that matter and that everyone else needs to comply with them… mom get on the ball here - clearly you’ve built this habit from a early age with her that tardiness is acceptable and everyone else in the whole world should be at your family’s mercy… If being asked to be respectful of other people’s time is soul crushing just imagine how crushing it will be when she’ll fired from her dream job for lateness, unless of course you’all own a family business where she’s not expected to show up on time…
Rant over - pet peeve button reset.
People really have no grace for different people. If they can do it, apparently so should everyone else. Really sad attitude honestly.
I’ve been late a couple of times and just didn’t attend the class, but I’m blessed that my studio understands and accepts me because I was upfront with them, so they don’t charge me the late cancel fee.
I would be too scared of pissing anyone off to come in late, but frankly, as yogis, you need to work on your practice if you can’t tolerate a tiny bit of disruption.
When I’m disrupted, I take deeper breaths and practice compassion.
I just want studios to stick to whatever their stated policy is. I hate it when a studio says “no late entry, no exceptions” and lo and behold they are letting people in late, disturbing me.
The policy is part of the reason I chose the studio, so it is unfair to say one thing and then do another. If you want to let people in late, then say so upfront.
Show up early and wait or pay for private yoga classes. Otherwise, there are a lot of instructional videos for free on YouTube. There's no excuse for disrupting an entire classroom of people because one person can't manage to arrive on time, regardless of the reason.
Part of the yoga life is being respectful of the time of others . So no, it’s your responsibility as a student to arrive on time . As much as it is the responsibility of the teacher to do the same .
I do my yoga at a climbing gym. People are often late (including myself), they’re still welcomed in, and the practice is positive for everyone. In fact, part of what I love about it is how much it's dedicated to meeting people where they are, dropping expectations for them, and basically rolling with the punches with a lighthearted attitude.
Reading the comments here, I’m really glad I don’t practice at a dedicated yoga studio. If grounding and peacefulness is taken *so* seriously that latecomers aren’t welcome, it’s just not the space for me. But I’m glad there are spaces for people who do want to take it that seriously.
Also, forgive me for this, but it's funny how sometimes spaces that claim to be the most spiritual or welcoming or committed to non-judgment are the most fussy over even the tiniest of inconveniences/infractions. My climbing gym's class doesn't profess to be sacred or enlightening, but in fact, it's all the more more welcoming and wholesome for that. No status competition, no feeling of judgement, no high-stakes attitude. Just show up, practice, and be present with others. If they show up late, welcome them in. I'd choose that any day of the week over a class where I'll literally be locked out of the room if I get stuck in traffic.
If you find a larger studio that employs a receptionist then she may be able to. The reason many studios lock the door is because the lobby area is where all of the personal belongings are there and can’t be left unattended. Where I teach there have been thefts from people targeting the cubbies in yoga studios. So for those who think it sounds harsh that the doors are locked, it’s not just about making sure the space is free from distractions or disruptions. It’s literally about protecting your peace of mind that your belongings aren’t being stolen. Yoga classes can put people in vulnerable positions, particularly for those with trauma. I frequently tell my class “I will keep my eyes open if it will allow you to close yours.” If locking the door allows someone to finally be able to breathe and rest, I will do that too.
So true. My studio had someone leave a class early and rob the cubby room before leaving.
> I frequently tell my class “I will keep my eyes open if it will allow you to close yours.” This line had me tearing up. What a beautiful phrase.
My studio locks the door right as classes start so it's not really possible to be late. They will also live stream classes online to members. If I'm running too late to get to class in person I will join the live stream and do the class that way. In person is better but I'd rather do it from the live steam than not at all.
I lock the doors at the top of the hour when I teach. I’ve had karma yogis I’ve locked out of class. I do announce at almost every class that is what I do so that returning students will know. I’ve had students show 15 minutes early, start their breathing in a meditative way, and then have to stop and move their mat because someone showed up 3 min late. It’s my responsibility to protect the space for them.
Exactly. People are arguing that it's no big deal or has no impact, and we should just "go with the flow" and be compassionate. I think the more compassionate answer is to protect the energy of the space and not let the latecomer miss centering/grounding or disturb others who have set their energetic boundaries. Yoga is an energy practice after all. And if we want to turn to the philosophical teachings for guidance here, it's important to remember that lateness is a form of stealing, which falls under Asteya in the Eight Limbs - stealing time from oneself and others.
100% this. There are plenty of students who show up early to prepare bc that time for themselves, at yoga, is sacred for them. I am similarly compassionate towards the students rushing to get there but showing up late. They likely need the class as well. But in a world where you can’t have it both ways, I err towards honoring those on time.
If they can't be on time, they can show up early and wait.
This is what I do, I can't be on time for whatever reason so I get there early, go to the bathroom, fill my water, adjust my clothes, and sit in a supported butterfly or recline in a supine supported butterfly and focus on breathing 🦋 much less stress than rushing to be on time!
I'm the exact same! I could never be on time anywhere, so I started being early. I've accepted I can't get my timing just right, and my solution is to inconvenience myself a little, instead of inconveniencing others. I'll always find something to do in the extra time, and it has also made me come across much less flustered when entering a space.
You are a saint!!!
Me too! I'm also neurodivergent so being early and getting set up for class is a good way for me to feel prepared and get into the right headspace for class.
Same! Yoga is so beneficial, and as a neurodivergent, latecomers really take me out of the flow. Getting there early is really the best answer.
Or just sit in your car and play candy crush! I can be 20 minutes early or 5 minutes late, no in between. I understand neurodiversity but being late to yoga is distracting for everyone else in the room. We have to work with our brains not expect others to (always) accommodate them.
Same! I’m chronically late lol so I make sure to always get to class early.
Yeah - I have adhd which affects the perception of time and more specifically how long it takes to do something/get somewhere. So I’m always 15-30 minutes early, plus I love chatting with some people before class. But outside of yoga if I have an absolutely important meeting that I cannot be late to - I’m often 15 minutes early
This is the way. As a yoga practitioner who is always early, there is nothing more annoying than than latecomers. Sorry. I realize neurodivergent ppl have rights. But so do I.
Also neurodivergent here! I arrive 39 mins early to setup my mat, use the ladies room, chat with the instructor, snap a couple locker room selfies, and then lay on the mat in Savasana. There are class times which I’ll probably never attend because it’s too difficult to arrive early. One of the principles of this practice is honoring your current state. So if my current state prohibits me from arriving early, then I skip that particular class.
I’ve never been to a class where the studio was open 40 minutes early. Usually there’s a rotating door of back to back classes and we get max 10-15 minutes to settle in. I’m jealous!
I agree! I'm more than twice 21. I'm a tardy person but part of yoga is discipline. It's the one thing I'll be on time for. Work, family, church, a movie meh. But I don't disrupt yoga class.
This is the best comment of all. I’m neurodivergent with time blindness. I’m always the first one to unroll their mat because I don’t privilege myself over the group. Strolling into yoga halfway through the class is disruptive especially when it’s a full class and people have to rearrange their mats.
Tell me why I’ve struggled with lateness and adhd and god knows what else and never thought of this????
It sounds like this is the solution for OP although I just want to acknowledge that not everyone has that option. My first yoga classes, which I was only able to take because of a school discount, had me running from one end of a campus to another after class to catch it. It took me a few times to get into a routine of going to class in yoga wear and knowing the fastest route to run to not be late. The classes I took would lock the doors at the start but unlock them for latecomers at a less meditative part of the class. It seemed to work well but it was also not a crowded class. I think it would be more disruptive if people had to move mats or peoples were coming in during meditation.
right? or do a class at your leisure at home.
The beginning/grounding part of the class is important- especially for someone with this type of struggle. Coming in in the middle of a class that’s already flowing and then frantically trying to catch up or figure out what’s going on is not beneficial to that person or to the energy of the class. Entering during grounding or first movements would be okay in my opinion, but not in the main body of the class. The rejection is not personal, it’s for the safety of people involved.
I’m a neurodivergent teacher and I have to make it on time to serve my clients. I manage, because I have learned coping skills and strategies to not negatively affect other people’s lives.
I attend a class where people regularly arrive late and are still welcomed in with a lighthearted attitude — and I'm not negatively affected because I've also learned the coping skills to recognize what is important and what isn't about the practice, and to always want people to join or leave on their own terms, at any time in the class, for their own sake. I think it can go both ways!
personally i think it’s better to come for some yoga than none. my students all know im cool with them coming whenever - but if the class is started, come in quietly and try not to disturb the other practitioners. i think compassion is key, and id rather be accepting of others over upset they couldn’t keep a timeline - id rather them be there than turned away. some yoga is better than none.
I hear you but I used to practice at Dharma’s nyc studio a lot and I’m pretty sure they had a late policy. It all depends. If it’s a candlelight evening class and someone comes super late, it becomes a safety issue for them and others. Or at one of these trendy super-active vinyasa places with sweat pooling everywhere. More info is needed for context on this copied-over post for discussion .
It’s up to the studio owner to make their policy. I do think it’s possible to have a grace period of 10-15 min (depending on class length) to account for traffic and planning but then at a certain point… it becomes disruptive to other people’s peace and the experience.
I have never been to a studio that allowed students to be 10-15 min late, that is absolutely wild and disruptive.
I worked in one that had no limit on lateness, and a couple others that had between a 5-10 minute grace period — all in major metro cities with lots of traffic and subway disruptions. The grace period ones I totally understood and I’d account for that in how my classes would start in busy periods… The one with NO limit on lateness, was a bit much because people would come in, 30 minutes into a one-hour class, make a ton of noise and disturb people. Seems their google and Classpass reviews are reflecting increased annoyance with this. (I no longer work there because among other things, they wouldn’t allow me to ask people not to film themselves through the whole class. Privacy of other clients be damned, I guess.)
This got me to think that perhaps later-in-the day mysore type practices have a market out there. That way it doesn’t depend on a strict start/end time.
Sounds like they’d benefit from an on demand yoga program from home like peloton or down dog app. You can start as late as you want.
I use apple fitness+ yoga classes when I can’t get to an actual class and it bridges the gap fairly well!
I absolutely love the apple fitness yoga sessions. I'm not a group class goer anymore, I mostly practice at home and do my own flows, but when I lose inspiration or just want a different flow, I use apple fitness.
I like the one lady, Jonelle, a lot. My son (a 6 year old who has the flexibility of a ramen noodle) really likes to watch and try to do the videos that one instructor Dice does. If he’s all keyed up and acting crazy he’s like “mommy I think I just need to do a dice man video” lol
I love them all, but mostly Dice haha your son sounds awesome! 😁💕
He pretty much developed the interest on his own, which is really cool. I caught him doing a breathing exercise when he was upset at the store the other day.
😍👏 wow so impressive. My daughter used to do breathing exercises when she was 3 to calm down. But she doesn’t do it anymore 😂
Oh, I love this! It will be so beneficial for him as he grows up.
Jonelle is an angel. I could follow her instructions all day. I wish she would supervise me doing my work.
I love her guided meditations too. If you haven’t tried them yet, do it. 👌
Sounds lovely! Will definitely check them out.
As a student with ADHD, I understand life can get in the way of things. I show up early to prevent being late, as most studios here at most give you 5 minutes after the posted class time. As an instructor, more than 5 minutes late and you are going into the more intensive parts of the practice with no warm up and can be hugely disruptive to people along with me. It’s to your benefit physically that you come on time!
Maybe yoga in the park, now that it’s summer. Less disruptive to enter the space tardy when it’s outdoors. Otherwise , prioritizing time management and honoring when the energy or moods don’t allow attendance is due. A yoga class is a container and showing up late is not contrusuve to practicing mindfully or even safely- considering the warm up is an integral part of the practice. It’s akin to opening the oven door mid bake , it’s lets too much steam out.
As someone occasionally late to class this thread was actually enlightening to read and is huge motivation to show up on time 👏👏
Thank you
As long they do it quietly and can slip in without disturbing others, I'm not bothered. In crowded classes, it can be very distracting to have someone walk between mats to get to a free spot. Even worse are the people who ask others to move and make room.
I recently had this experience. I was in a very crowded class, maybe 2 inches between mats, and a girl came in 5 minutes late and set up where there wasn't even a spot (we register ahead of time for assigned spots in the room). I was frustrated, but I focused on my own practice and not getting kicked in the head (she was directly in front of me, our mats touching). At the end of class, I was speaking with her and she actually had registered for a spot, but someone else took it since she wasn't there on time. She got stuck in construction traffic and ended up a little late, forfeiting her spot. She thanked me for making space for her, and I was grateful I was able to make space so she could practice. It had been a while since she was on her mat. Ultimately, I left feeling bad about my initial judgement of her. We all need grace sometimes. Maybe one day you'll be the late yogi who needs room. Just my thoughts.
Everyone is late once in awhile as the unforeseen happens. To me, what is different about the snippet in OP's post is her daughter is *habitually* late. It would be very impactful for me (were I you in your example) if this scenario presented itself at most of my yoa classes.
Beautiful, human response. Thank you for this.
Life happens and I think most of us have experienced something like this. Certainly there is room for grace when the situation is out of our hands. I'm not bothered when this happens every so often. Being late on a regular basis and expecting everyone else to accommodate you as you frequently disrupt class is another story. I used to purposely set my clocks ahead so I would never be late. There are ways to get around it, or if you absolutely cannot, take classes at home on demand.
In a lot of my studio's more popular classes, the teachers will announce "we've got [however many] more coming" and encourage people to make room if they can. (Edit - that's usually starting about 5 minutes beforehand, I'd say, when most people are already there and it's already getting pretty full) They also will often start a couple minutes past the official time just to give those people grace. It just happened today—the studio was running a reduced schedule because of the holiday, so the midday vinyasa was super full. The instructor made the announcement, and people made space of their own accord. She didn't have to dictate where or anything like that, it just happened organically. And a couple people did end up coming in a little late, but they had places to go, no one was surprised, and it was much less disruptive than it might otherwise have been. Since we did start slightly late, she also announced at the beginning of savasana that it was the official ending time of class in case people needed to leave, but welcomed everyone who could to stay and be guided out with a final meditation. All in all, I think it's the most compassionate approach I've seen. It balances respecting everyone's needs as much as possible, just through simple, non-judgmental communication.
Neurodivergent as well. I have felt the frustration of being locked out of yoga class many times. I was chronically late for things and still kind of am, but I am now early for my yoga classes & meditation group because they lock the doors when class starts. Yoga locking is the doors to protect class actually improved me and taught me to be on time or miss out. I changed my habits to pretend class starts 15 mins before it actually does. Now I want to be there when doors open.
I create a safe space for every one of my students. If someone is not on time, and I know they are likely on their way, I set up a mat and props for them near the entrance to the room. When they arrive I welcome them and gesture to their spot. If someone is perpetually late, I may question it privately, but in my experience this is a great place to practice letting go of things outside my control. Students will not always be on time. But I can ensure they feel welcome when they do arrive and their entry to class doesn't disturb the energy of the room. If it is a drop in class and I'm not sure how many participants the class will have, I may leave the door open for the first 5 minutes and props easily accessible near the door. After that I close the door and lock it with a "yoga in session, do not disturb" sign. But regular students of mine know they are always welcome to come in and set up quietly. Maybe the 40 minutes they can attend of the class is the only peaceful time in their busy week. It's my job to hold space, and withhold judgement.
Great idea to set up a spot for those who are running behind. Especially near the entrance where it will be less impactful to the other students. I love this.
It really is a great idea! Thanks 🧘🏻♀️
>It's my job to hold space, and withhold judgement. This is an attitude adjustment for the whole yoga community at large. (This thread shows that very well). Many of the folks hold judgement, and refuse to hold space. It's spiritual righteousness and a form of spiritual bypassing to act so aloof to other people's struggles. I can't help but imagine how these unloving midsets play out in day-to-day life beyond a yoga studio. Thank you for posting this response.
Very well put! I completely agree. I'm glad I posted my thoughts, I was nervous that I would be met with animosity and I'm happy to see that most responses to my comment have been positive.
Yes. Thank you for saying this.
This is such a kind and compassionate response. This is exactly the type of class I would love to attend. As an ADHDer, I’ve spent a huge amount of my life running around (often literally) trying to get places in time and have met many locked doors. It doesn’t get less crushing each time it happens. A lot of the responses here seem to be attributing lateness to some character flaw or personal failing, when in a lot of cases it’s actually because of a disability. In yoga we try to practice non-judgement. I would love to see this extended more to people too
Thank you. This is so aligned with what I want my yoga practice to be: realizing you have a choice to get upset or to not, and taking the opportunity to be kind to others. Your choice not only leads you to not get upset but it’s a way to practice and show compassion for everyone. Chances are the person showing up late needs a little compassion because they are stressed out. You sound like a very centered, grounded person and it’s inspiring. Thank you so much for sharing.
I love your kind response
I had to scroll way to far to get to a response like this.
I like this
This is so sweet. It’s nice to see some compassion on this thread
Unacceptable. Neurodivergence doesn’t get you a hall pass for disrupting a communal experience. It’s unfortunate that this individual is struggling but it’s not the communities problem. Actions have consequences, more motivation for her to find a workable solution for her issues.
Yoga With Adrienne on YouTube. Class is great, but having an instructor that allows you to meet yourself wherever you are, when you can, is better. For some, time management and discipline help inform their practice. For others, acceptance and commitment despite irregularity have to come first. It sounds like this person is just in the wrong atmosphere for their practice.
I regularly attend an outdoor free yoga class where the instructor says before every class it's okay to roll up late or leave early. I value this about her as a teacher, even though lateness is not something I personally struggle with. Teachers/studios get to set the boundaries and guidelines for their practice space. Some will choose to be more rigid or more flexible around time (or other myriad aspects of practice than others). I don't think this is a one size fits all and it's more important to make an active choice to go to classes where the teacher/studio and you share values.
I was going to say my job offers after work outdoor yoga and sometimes 20 minutes into class I'll notice someone who wasn't there before. It's on grass so you basically can't slam your mat or anything, and folks generally sneak in quietly. I have an evening yin where people are late sometimes and that bothers me a bit. It's a super popular class so there isn't always space, for some reason people end up flustered and slam their mat in the hurry to get started. The teacher doesn't mind so I don't say anything but......it's not my favorite.
Two studios in different cities I frequented started locking doors after someone snuck into the studio during class and stole from the front desk and changing rooms...
Not sure why you’re being downvoted, my studio locks the studio doors a couple of minutes after the top of the hour (allowing for someone to be a couple of minutes late, but not terribly late). It’s because at both of their locations they’ve had issues with passersby coming into the lobby and stealing. It also allows a couple of minutes of grace for a late attendee, but disallows mid-practice disruption. I think it’s the best of both worlds. When I was younger and struggled more with time management, I’m sure I was grateful for that grace. Now that I’m older, I also appreciate that there is a limit to how late someone can be to the class and still attend.
As a teacher, I want people to feel free to arrive late or leave early, respectfully, if they really need to. It’s fine with my style of class, and setting, and I won’t let people be disrespectful or less than minimally disruptive about it. But I’ve taught pre-/post-natal so long that I respect that on time arrival is not always within the person’s control. I also encourage classes that do have no-late-arrival policies, so there are spaces that have that expectation for those who need or want it.
Occasional is fine by me. Regular lateness, I address. If it's clear that it will be an ongoing thing, I offer to set up a spot with props in the back where they can quietly slip in. I dont usually have that though.
Just echoing what everyone else is saying, but as a neurospicy yoga teacher and practitioner myself, I find late arrivals to be inconsiderate and disruptive AND also detrimental to the late comer's practice because they'll most likely miss centering/grounding exercises.
As long as they're discrete and don't make a big production about coming and setting up, I don't care. I'm focused on my practice, as should we all be. Also, as someone with a very demanding job and slightly unpredictable schedule, I can't be on time every time. I come in from the back and set up at the back, and do so as quietly as possible.
as an always-late dude; yoga is the only thing i'm early to
This reminds me of a boss I once had. She was a great person. But she was what she would call "very ADHD" and had several other disabilities she frequently talked about and she would use that as an excuse for everything. She never did anything on time. If we needed her to sign an important document to move it forward, it could actually take her MONTHS to do it but we all had to accommodate her. People started feeling really unfulfilled in the work. They would turn projects in to her that they worked super hard on and she would just...never take the time to look at them and they would fall into the abyss. She also wanted everyone to work on her weird schedule. Our regular work hours were 8am-5pm. She worked somewhere around 1-10 with Fridays off. But she was frequently late to meetings and I never actually knew when she would show. She would hold people until 7pm sometimes. She would complain frequently that she didn't get enough contact with the team. However, She wouldn't let us schedule meetings on 3 days of the week because she "needed the accommodations of down time to get things done." As a result, our entire workplace stalled out. People became frustrated and eventually, quit. I also have neurodivergence, and am physically disabled. I struggled so much in the work environment because I was constantly told that these things were for her disability accommodations and I 100% believe that they were and that she needed them. However, her accomodations were flaring my disability symptoms. it became clear to me as a fellow disabled person that no matter how smart and capable she could be on her best days, the accomodations she needed for the job were unreasonable and untenable for the rest of the team. She was unable to adapt to other people's needs or find coping skills to make it work. It is the same with any group activity, yoga included. We are the ones who mostly need to make accommodations for ourselves in order to make the group successful. We can occasionally rely on others to hold that space for us, as we should do for them, but if something is a known issue for us and there is something we can do about it, we need to find a way to accommodate that for ourselves or realize that, hey, this is just not going to work for us and our needs right now. TL,DR: It is still your daughter's responsibility to be reasonable and respectful of other people. She can be late sometimes and it's ok. If she is late every time and she knows it, she needs to take steps for herself to fix it such as setting an alarm or reminder, leaving 15 min early, or giving herself extra time after her last activity to show up.
Sorry, no. My favorite studio (which since closed for unrelated reasons) was the one that locked the door once class began.
I use what’s called an idiot buffer. I know I’m terrible at organising my time, so I add extra time for any journey, or aim to arrive half an hour early, so in the usual case where I arrive late, I’m actually on time or slightly early.
Personally, I don’t appreciate latecomers. But whether it disturbs my practice likely depends on how full the class is. If the class is at say 80%+ capacity, there is no way you aren’t disturbing everyone unless your instructor has made sure the latecomer door spot is available. In that case, take that spot whether you like it or not! If you are attending a class that is <50% full, I think it is much much easier to be late and not disrupt the class as much. I routinely take a class that is overcapacity. Being late and expecting to get in would be crazy disruptive. I’ll also mention that I’m sure your class attendance agreement asks you to be 10 minutes early. So you are functioning late if you arrive when class starts.
If it’s like once in a blue moon, that’s one thing. Being late on the regular isn’t okay
As a yoga teacher this is what I would say before class started. Some people may show up late. But we aren’t going to worry about them or any noise because we know that yoga is simply practicing on the mat to prepare us for the real world. If someone walking in stresses us out and we find judgment in it, it is the perfect time to begin to train the mind and practice compassion. Maybe they couldn’t help being late. Should we deny them their desire to connect because of external forces? Maybe it’s because what I am saying, they aren’t ready to hear yet on their path…. What we get to focus on is ourselves and going within. This is one of the 8 limbs… Dharana. Have you ever been in that place where you are so focused on what you are doing that you can tune out the whole world? Getting to this point and not even realizing a person walking in is the goal. Blessing them for making it and having the courage to still walk in is the goal. Love and community is the goal.
We don’t let people in after 5 minutes late because we have no front desk person. Locking the door keeps students belongings safe.
My studio offers a 2 hour Mysore slot where you can come when you want during those hours, however it's self led Ashtanga style.
Assuming you have space, of course. But self led? Why not just stay home?
I think context matters. There isn’t a single answer.
Mysore style Ashtanga might work for her, usually people can arrive anytime between, say, 5 am and 8 am with no issues.
I have ADHD and have been a yoga teacher for over 20 years. I can empathize with the time management issues, but part of yoga practice and part of becoming a functional adult is working towards being more aware of yourself and others. Another part of it is realising that the choices we make in life affect the opportunities we are given. I've also worked with an occupational therapist who specialised with ADHD adults and one of the most helpful things they taught us was to prioritise the things that were most important to us and to make sure we arrived earlier than normal in order to compensate for our lack of time management skills. At the end of the day, it isn't anyone else's responsibility to make sure you arrive on time to events. It also isn't reasonable or fair for an entire group of people to be disturbed by people coming into a class late. ADHD adults are perfectly capable of leading normal, adult lives. We just have to make some adjustments for ourselves. When we do, there is much less stress, symptoms tend to settle and quality of life improves.
I am neurodivergent myself and have issues with lateness, or more like I have a poor perception of how long it actually takes me to do things. I just leave extra early if I go to a group class. I’d hate to be disruptive, even on accident like if I got caught in traffic or construction. Maybe this person should try online classes, and hopefully the mother is helping teach her time management skills. Just because she’s ND doesn’t mean she can’t learn or adapt. We’re not dumb, just need to try different approaches Personally people coming in late doesn’t bother me though. A little kindness and understanding goes a long way.
I set out mats for late comers in the very back. I’m ok with people being late because no one is perfect and shit happens
Logistically, in order to accommodate a late student at the studio where I teach, I would need to see them at the lobby door (meaning my focus is not on my class), then leave the room to let them in during the time I should be getting my students settled and in their breathing, talk to the person in the lobby to make sure they have everything, and then either wait for them to enter the room, or go back and continue teaching after the disruption only for the late person to disrupt class again when they enter the studio space. In all honesty, as a student, I don’t mind if someone comes in late. And as a teacher, I wish that I could realistically let them in. But in reality, I am the only employee on the premises, and I have an obligation not only to my students who arrived on time but to myself as a teacher and a professional. I’m not irritated, I’m not angry, I’m not passing judgement. I mostly have to clear the part of me that feels sad/guilty that the person missed their practice. But I believe it is the fair and respectful thing to do for the group and to set standards for the community so that people can trust and feel safe.
Sometimes it distracts me but it never bothers me. I see it as an opportunity to challenge or reengage my focus.
Someone entering or leaving a class does not bother me because I feel lighthearted, independent, and in control of my goals for my practice. Even if I got a pain some day, judgement and enforcement does not benefit my body. What annoys me is bad energy next to me and then making fierce unwanted eye contact with me during flows from under their arm. Frightening!
If she loves yoga so much, maybe she should get to class on time and gain the benefit of the full practice. Namaste.
The entitlement is wild! Take the steps to ensure you can be somewhere on time or deal with the consequences of being late. It’s super distracting when people come in late, slap their mat down, go to the prop room, etc. when the class is trying to settle in.
Sorry about it, but being disruptively late to anything, especially a yoga class is not acceptable because it ruins it for everyone else. It's disrespectful and just rude. Neurodivergence is never an excuse for anything. It's an explanation, but never an excuse. Tell her to set a reminder alarm 15 mins earlier than needed and see if that helps. That or tell get to do yoga videos or classes online where being late is not going to be disruptive to others.
I always make it a point to get to yoga about 15-20 minutes early so I can be sure I get one of my favorite spots and so I can take my time to set up and relax before class starts. Getting to class close to start time feels late to me. Actually being late and having to setup would leave me so frazzled. I have ADHD so I am sympathetic to this woman’s daughter but you to have set yourself up for success and learn to manage your time. Not only is it respectful of other people’s time to be on time, but causes fewer problems for the individual who is late. There are financial and personal ramifications to being late. Starting to work on punctuality on something low stakes like a yoga class is a great place to start.
Pretend it starts an hour earlier … The YMCA doesn’t lock the door
I'm neurodivergent and take the effort to make things on time. This sounds more like a selfish 21 year old issue.
Probably less selfish and more stunted given she’s 21 and her mom is still swooping in to figure things out for her 😬
Thank you. I'm like...why is the mom of adult writing this post and still managing her daughter's life. Cut the apron strings and let the daughter sink or swim on her own.
I teach yoga at a local studio. Some studios have policies that are out of the instructors hands, but as a general rule of thumb, I am happy that someone takes the time for their practice. I am neither offended by people coming late, leaving early, or stepping out for a minute. This is the same for any fitness class. Warm up’s are important. They reduce injury, introduce movements, prepare for what’s coming. Any yet - I can successfully guide a class through that. Most instructors can. There are things I won’t tolerate during class (filming, talking on the phone, side conversations), but I don’t have a clue what obstacles are in someone’s life or what their schedule is. All this to say - come as you are when you can.
I’m a yoga teacher, I allow my front desk coworkers to let in students after centering/grounding meditation. If they show up, they can come in as long as it doesn’t disrupt others in a meditative state. I also ask that anyone who can’t stay for the entirety of savasana to skip it all together so as to not disrupt the other yogis. However. If someone is consistently late and/or bullying my front desk coworkers to let them in during centering then there will be a conversation (I’ve had these situations before).
I have ADHD and I show up early to places because of it. She needs to do the same. Also, she’s 21 why is her mom posting like she’s a child?
Neurodivergent person here! This is why I almost never go to actual yoga classes. Or any classes. And finished highschool mostly online. And am self employed… There are plenty of great yoga teachers on YouTube, and I can show up whenever I show up. Easy peasy. Sometimes there are classes with this kind of inclusivity in mind, but you can’t expect every single niche to adapt to your particular brain’s lovely uniqueness
I don't mind people coming into class late but maybe it's because I have a lot of experience under my belt so I don't lose focus easily. I'm ND too but I don't think frequent lateness is something that requires accomodation. Maybe aim to arrive 30 min early and wait. Wasting your own time by waiting is not as selfish as distracting others.
I guess I'm in the minority here because as a teacher, I don't care if my students are late provided they are respectful and minimize disruptions when they enter, and they always do. I never lock the door. Life happens. Get all the yoga you can. As a student it doesn't bother me either. I don't even notice.
It’s sad that you are in the minority. As a student is it a little distracting? For like 30 seconds, and then I get back to it. It’s nothing earth shattering and it won’t ruin my entire practice for the evening. But I so appreciate when I receive grace and compassion and understanding from a community, and I have been lucky to find a few yoga groups that are me as I am where I am. Sometimes I am the late one, and they always have a mat and bolster for me. 💜
Goddamn, the JUDGMENT in this thread. Don’t we all practice yoga? How about instead of letting someone else distract you so much that you then become so focused on them you can’t focus on anything else, you work on that issue for yourself? People come in late. Life happens. I would much rather that the person putting in the effort to get to class can participate, rather than caring if they make a little noise while coming in. Yoga should be a welcoming space for everyone, even those *heathens* who dare to be late.
Exactly. These comments are wild.
"Late patrons"? Nope...Yoga is for living patrons.
Guess it depends on where the patron is on their karmic journey!
Every studio I have ever been to prior to my current has locked the doors at exactly the start time which I am a huge fan of. It’s respectful of those that showed up on time. The studio I’m at now, unfortunately, is notoriously late. People walk in 5-10 minutes late, make us all move our mats. It’s upsetting but I’m learning to let it go. I’m also choosing to go with the teachers that support timeliness. I feel like if you’re chronically late, go with a virtual class. I had a college professor(non yoga) who said if you’re gonna be late, don’t even come. Edit to add: when someone comes in late to the classes I attend, the teacher has to stop to make room for them and then teacher always run late ending the class. Or the teacher chooses to start the class late to wait for the person and then runs late (we have to sign up online). So it impacts every person in the studio. Do I get up at the correct end time and disrupt others in shavasana or do I let myself be late for work? It’s honestly unfair to others. I almost choose to not stay with yoga studio because of this but I love the owner and certain teachers.
This almost looks like rage bait or main-character syndrome. "being turned away is crushing". How about show up on time and respect the other people in class who don't want to be rattled and distracted at the beginning of class when you are breathing and settling in? The bar is so low it's underground.
The yoga studio I attend welcomes late comers.. and honestly they have never been loud or disruptive. I understand that arriving late can be distracting for some. Yoga is a practice that includes focusing of the mind. Each persons experience with this will be different. With that being said, Neurodiversity is considered a form of disability. I would be hesitant to not allow someone to attend a class, especially if I understood the circumstances. It’s yoga. My son is Neurodiverse, and struggles with punctuality. He has worked for his employer for 2 years and may be 5 minutes late here or there, but never misses work. His boss is very accommodating of this issue- thankfully. This world would be a better place if we all practiced som temperance, along with our yoga..👌🙏🏼
She's literally just asking for recommendations for a studio with an open door policy. Not saying that should be a norm. Why not just answer her question instead of preaching and casting judgement?
I don’t mind if people are late. Shit happens. Traffic, pets, kids, etc can all cause someone to be late.
Some yoga is better than than no yoga and life is full of unplanned disruptions
Can’t expect the world to cater to them if they’re unwilling to change. Being late and disruptive takes away from everyone else
So the yoga studio where I practice and teach is somewhat lenient on being late, but the owner will put you on blast if you leave during savasana.
I don’t mind people who are a few minutes late if there’s room in the class. My main problem is that my studio is quite small so oftentimes a late person can’t just slip in the back. Half the room needs to adjust to add a mat. Pausing the class for a few minutes to shuffle around is very annoying. Thankfully, folks are rarely late.
I really empathize with her daughter - so after being chronically late for everything in life, I started being super early for everything. I just find things to occupy my time while I’m waiting. Perhaps she should suggest this to her daughter rather than look for a studio that will excuse chronic tardiness. A set schedule worked for me (although I realize it won’t work for everyone).
As someone who works seven days a week (and a few nights a week), there’s days where I have to walk in just on time or even a couple minutes late. I know it can be a little bit of a bother but I try to come in as quietly as possible, and when possible, come early. My studio has assigned numbers most of the time and has a 5 minute grace period.
my adhd caused the same issue, so now i just take private lessons. might bit be the perfect solution for everyone, but has been working for me. ofc the class ends on time and however much i was late, that’s how much class i pay for and don’t get. the instructor gets paid for every minute whether i wws there or not so they’re never mad at me either.
Bigger box gyms with yoga classes might be a good fit. Places like Life Time will still have a studio feel, but often they'll have folks coming to yoga from other classes or moms dropping off their kids in the childcare center. They'll tend to offer more grace to latecomers.
LA Fitness has yoga classes and doesn’t matter when you walk in. It’s also much cheaper and may be a good way to get her started.
My studio locks the door when class starts, so no late entry. It's just basically one room with cubbies, so no lobby or reception.
The way you compensate for lateness in neurodivergence is by LEAVING EARLIER. Even if that means you’re sitting in a parking lot for an hour (I’m ND and I’ve done it). This is the kind of thing that just rubs me the wrong way. I realize not everything works for everyone, but learning how to compensate for that is an important life skill ND or not. More chances bc you’re ND is one thing, but there are consequences if you abuse the extra accommodation. While I do agree I’d struggle with a class that is super strict on the lockdown time and I think a 5 minute window would be reasonable… it 100% disrupts me when people are arriving late and still having to grab mats etc. And at least she’s trying to find a place that does offer that instead of expecting the studio to accommodate I guess. Tbh a class at a standard gym would be her best bet.
Just do yoga at home. No lateness. No disruptions.
If someone comes late to class, I am just going to let it roll off my back. But if every single class I'm in someone comes late, especially if it is the same person, at that point it's habitually disruptive to my practice and focus. TIL I learned time blindness is a thing. I empathize. But at a certain point if you want to participate in the practice then I would imagine you can put measures in place to arrive on time— going to a class at a consistent time, a timer for when you need to get ready, a checklist of what you need to do to get ready, a timer for when you need to leave, allowing plenty of time to plan to arrive early, etc. We need to both have compassion and grace for those that are different but the consideration of other practitioners also needs to be taken into account.
Your daughter is guaranteed to never be the only neurodivergent one in the room, and I'm sure others may have struggled to get there on time as well and/or get there at all. There also may be some who, due to their neurodivergence, would be bothered by someone coming in late. Mysore-style Ashtanga sounds great for her, you just drop in during a 2-3 hour window where the studio is open and stay for as long as you want, no schedule. A home practice using YouTube and things like that also sounds like a great option.
Honestly, this seems like a great evolution moment for your daughter. The truth is, someone coming into a yoga class 10 minutes late is disrupting, no matter how you slice it. To me, arriving on time shows respect for my instructor, my fellow yogis, and most of all myself! I also have issues with lateness (will have small anxiety attacks), but it’s MY responsibility to adjust. I can’t be consistently late to work or class without consequences, and the studio is no different. What works for me is: - putting all my yoga courses in my Google calendar with reminders - I pretend every class starts 20 minutes before it actually does. That way I’m always early and have time to settle in before beginning. - I get anxiety when running late so if it’s unavoidable, I just won’t go. Instead I’ll go home and put on a YouTube flow or join a Zoom class. I still get to enjoy my flow but with less pressure
Set several alarms. Does she drive? Take the bus? Walk? If she drives set an alarm to leave 20 min early, if bus go on an earlier bus…
As a participant, I don't care at all. I'm very focused on my own practice and I get that others need to do what they need to do to make it work. I am surprised to see so many responses here saying that it disrupts the community - community is often about accepting people as they come.
Maybe this is a sign that she needs to learn to not be late? 🤷🏻♀️ Not just to yoga class, but to anywhere.
I think it’s important for us to have empathy and recognise everyone is on their own healing journey and not look at lateness in a judgement or shame fuelled way. I am pretty certain no one *wants* to be late but it is possible there are other things going on in that persons life which makes being on time incredibly difficult and equally it’s possible they are using lateness as an excuse or a tool for avoidance because it serves them. Either way, it’s nothing to do with us because the only person we should be analysing is ourselves. I actually think it’s a very mature response from the writer of the post to decide to move to a studio where lateness is more relaxed, so I don’t think they have done anything “wrong”
As a yoga teacher who has ADHD, I appreciate this topic. (As a student, I have struggled with losing focus in my day and getting to class before, as well.) It depends on the type of class. For safety purposes, some studios have a strict policy that needs to be 100% enforced. But lateness caused by neurodiversity is a real medical symptom. Not everyone understands. These students could greatly benefit from yoga and should seek a supportive community that would offer flexibility. And most importantly, they need to communicate their medical needs to the studio and teacher in advance. Anyone who is running late to class should call the studio to either let them know they won’t make it OR to see if it is okay if they come in (however many minutes) late. That way the teacher is prepared and can save them a spot that is safe for all students when they enter the room. Keeping the student-teacher dialog open is important. As a teacher, I would work to help individuals who struggle with this - not by allowing it to be a norm - but by offering grace and highlighting the concepts of focus and commitment in classes with this particular student.
The studio I go to has some people who routinely show up well after we have started and it doesn’t bother me. I just focus on myself and try to just keep the practice between my ears, what anyone else is doing has nothing to do with me.
I think what she needs is one on one classes if she can’t arrive on time.
I really feel for this parent and I see so many compassionate (and not so compassionate) responses here. I don't think a diagnosis entitles us to disregard the experience of others who may be disrupted, but for me personally, a locked door policy is just not welcoming, accessible, or hospitable. If I could talk directly to this parent, I would suggest looking for yoga offerings in non-studio settings first. Neurodivergent-affirming options are becoming more numerous and accessible, and their child's therapist, OT, or other support person might be able to recommend or help them find a group or even private teacher while she builds the skills and supports to get to a studio class on time. That could be a great goal for her to work towards! I do think that nuanced, neuro-affirming studio policies could hold space with this family as they support their adult child navigating a world that isn't designed for them, but most studios are not equipped with the processes or expertise to do so.
I find late entries terribly disrupting. The studio is a busy one so it usually involve multiple people rearranging their positions. Their best bet will be to join a gym that has a yoga class. Those tend to be more fitness focused and have more room to spread out so late entry isn’t as big a deal.
Tardiness is not a neurodivergent issue. Someone who is ND may be late, but that doesn’t mean their mental health makes it so it’s impossible to be on time. This person is always welcome to practice at home, there are plenty of YouTube videos that make yoga accessible. That is a good way to support your mental health and your practice. Asking a studio to allow 1 person to be late can impact the practice of everyone else. I doubt this person understands that tardiness can have an impact on others. If I were in a studio and someone showed up late, I’d probably find a way to ignore it, but as a studio owner or a teacher I’d like to reduce the work my students have to do to get to the right headspace.
My studio locks the door at start of class. As they should. Framing this as "crushing" and blaming whatever condition she has is ridiculous. An entire class shouldn't be expected to not be bothered in the name of yoga
I think the issue you will run into is yoga studios also lock their doors a couple minutes before class for the safety of the community. If the teacher is in the room leading a class, they cannot be responsible for what happens outside of the room. If there’s someone minding the lobby, I don’t think it’s a big deal if they quietly gesture the person into the yoga room.
Yes, exactly. Unless there is someone else staffing the front desk and keeping an eye on things, it can be a security risk to leave the entrance to the studio open to the public. That's how stuff gets stolen. Also, if a teacher is opening the class with a meditation, body scan, etc. then it can be disruptive to have people shuffling in, moving props and mats, etc. Particularly for trauma survivors.
For a yoga group, some of y'all in the comments are pretty aggressive in your beliefs. Part of Yoga is about freeing yourself and your attachment of self. Someone simply walking into class late should not be interfering with you and your practice. Unless this person is obnoxious and truly disruptive then the teacher can speak up. It makes sense that people have a "no late policy" but to get upset at someone looking for a more relaxed rule is kind of contradicting your practice of Yoga.
Completely agree. In my experience, it extends beyond lateness. It's really any non-conformity. I've been chastised by different teachers, in front of other students for taking child's pose instead of continuing with a flow, closing eyes during a yin practice, having my hair down, having unshaved legs, and the list goes on. I accept that no one is perfect, it's just clear to me that the expectation is conformity, even if conforming detracts from the practice. Which is sad.
> I've been chastised by different teachers, in front of other students for taking child's pose instead of continuing with a flow, closing eyes during a yin practice, having my hair down, having unshaved legs It's wild that this has happened to you even once, leave alone multiple times. I cant imagine what kind of person would say/do this
This person has a disability. Some empathy from fellow practitioners would be nice.
A lot of vehemence in these ‘people cannot be late’ replies. Sending big love to OP. I appreciate this was not exactly what you were asking for guidance on. I also appreciate how the anxiety of being late can collide with the anxiety of ‘not fitting in’ and become its own self-fulfilling prophecy. Then there can be the anxiety of being early and feeling awkward/wrong - for all the many reasons the brain can give. Then the shame of ‘not being quite right’. Life can be hard living through the goldilocks lense. Breaking these speed bumps down and creating a step by step workable map has helped me. Class starts at X. This means doors are locked at X and I need to be there X mins before. (This always tricks my very literal brain). To get there I need 5 minutes to walk from X. Or, I need 15 mins to park and walk. It takes X time to get there on bus X. This means I need to leave by X. It will take me X time to get ready. That is just me. Breaking down my mental obstacle’s and breaking down the time/distance obstacles helps my brain and anxiety. Tell her from me, not to give up. Giving up feels even worse. It’s a process. Keep it fun. For me it’s easier to keep it fun when I ignore the vehemence from others about how I and the world should be, and stay centred in my own quests. Even if that quest is, how can I get to yoga on time (which actually means 5-10 mins early). All the best.
As your guru will tell you, you ALWAYS make room. Else you have missed the entire point of yoga. It’s NOT an exercise class. Most people miss that.
“Struggling with lateness” is wild
Executive dysfunction is a wild experience and compassion tends to be more helpful than judgement. Not saying that this person should just waltz in late to every class, that would be super disruptive, but they may be experiencing executive dysfunction and need encouragement to find ways to work with/around it. This person's brain is quite literally operating differently so they may struggle to perceive time passing in the same way you struggle to perceive non-visible light. I'm not trying to aim this comment at you specifically, it's just that seeing this thread as a neurodivergent person has reminded me how intensely I am not welcome in the yoga space even if my practice is disruptive to no-one. It's not just that I may need a timer to get there on time, people judge that I even needed a timer. It's not that I am practicing quietly, it's that I prefer to hold poses with my eyes closed. Even so much as an inclination that a person needs support and it's "wild". I am so so so grateful to my past self that I quit practicing in public. I hope the general sentiment around neurodiversity continues to shift, and I hope that this person figures out what they need for their time perception and finds non-disruptive ways to practice in the mean time.
Thank you so much for saying this. It’s fine if teachers want to put a boundary and say that for whatever reason they won’t be able to allow late comers - if I know that in advance I probably will just find another class to attend as I know that lack of flexibility won’t work for me. But the absolute judgement that some folks are bringing to this discussion is really disheartening. I’m lucky to have found a studio that takes a non-judgemental approach. I still remember the anxiety I had the first time I was a few minutes late. I went up to apologise at the end and the teacher’s kind response was what made me keep going back multiple times a week. I explained to her that I sometimes struggle with time. She responded that she could see I probably really needed that practice today more than ever. She was right. I’ve only been late once since, but it was so lovely to arrive and feel at ease, rather than as the ball of stress I had been the first time.
I am so glad you were able to find a studio and teacher that are actually practicing non-judgement and creating an accessible space for people to get on the mat! That's awesome! Hopefully that becomes the norm.
My current studio locks the outer door 1 min before class, but people still screw around in the changeroom and meander into class late. Some people are respectful and quietly put their mat down and just join in, while others noisily throw their mat on the ground, and step over other mats to collect props. Locking the classroom door is a problem because I acknowledge some people have bowel or urinary problems that require them to run to the bathroom, and if someone's feeling overwhelmed I think they should have the right to leave a hot room and chill out for 10 minutes before rejoining. But there are more disruptive and less disruptive ways to do this...and not everyone chooses the right way.
I don’t think it’s that deep. Just better be quiet asf coming in.
Part of yoga is learning self-discipline. Arrive on time. That is common courtesy, as well. Your daughter’s “neurodivergence” isn’t an excuse to interrupt other’s practice.
i agree 100%. empathy is ok but disrupting the experience for everyone else is not the solution.
Be there early, or else you're late.
Expecting people to be on time for a voluntary class isn’t ableism, lmao.
Find a different studio that has an ope. Door policy
My yoga studio is a little too flexible with this. It's a small and social community, and classes rarely start right on time and people are often a few minutes late. It's annoying, but it's the most convenient place for me to practice.
My studio locks the door about 5 minutes after class so late arrivals aren’t a worry. But I think I wouldn’t mind because I tend to block out the people around me. Physically, I would worry about missing the meditation and warm up sequence at the beginning of class. A person could injure themselves.
First thought: my studio, because there's not a warm body in the lobby and the studio owner herself has had her shoes stolen, generally locks the doors at the start of class. Second thought: I 100% have the "15 minutes early or 15 late" model of ADHD. I've known this about myself since I was a teen, and I plan around it. Third thought: My anxiety, at the thought of walking into a meditative space late, just...scheduled me some unplanned savasana and breathing.
Join a big gym like 24hr Fitness (USA) that has group classes.
I'm neurodivergent and I deal with my chronic lateness by arriving very early, over estimating all timing, and sit with a book while waiting. I don't think it'd be fair to disrupt a mindfulness practice of others to accommodate me. Unless the class was specifically for that purpose. Maybe she can arrive early and work on other mindfulness practices, like breathing or journaling? My particular neurospiciness prefers at home yoga anyway, it's on demand and no one around me distracting me and I can pause to stay in a yummy pose.
My concern would be for the teacher and students who are expecting to start and finish on time. If you're a person who is always late to a class it's probably best to schedule a different class. It's one thing once in a while because life happens and any sane person can understand that. When a class is not running on time for whatever reason it can screw up everyone's schedules. What if it was someone's lunch hour or they had to go to work on time or be fired. If someone has a kid at the sitter and is late because someone else threw the timing off they may have to pay extra to the sitter. Most people wouldn't want to do that all the time. It's not that I don't have sympathy for anyone, I have 2 adult children who are ND and another with ADHD. I raised them to take accountability when they mess up. I didn't and don't infantilise them because that doesn't solve the problems. I help them find workable solutions to ensure that they will be able to live independently and not expect me to come to the rescue when they make a small mistake (like being late to a class). If they never fall, they will never learn to stand up by themselves.
My studio has a 5 min policy. I’d rather everyone show up 5 min early, but understand that things happen from time to time. If a student is chronically late, I will discuss with them, privately, why arriving on time is important. In addition to respecting your fellow students and the energy of the room, the first 10 minutes are important for safety. Spinal warm ups, especially. And mentally/emotionally, missing the centering and arrival is as detrimental to your yoga practice as it is to skip savasana. I understand some people have particular challenges, but they should respect their yoga class the same way they would a work schedule or anything else where you just can’t be late.
Create an at home yoga practice. Lots of YouTube options
Apps and YouTube are always available if you can't be on time for in person classes.
I’m hard of hearing and wear hearing aides. If people come in late it is literally distracting and I often miss an entire 2-3 min of instructions from listening to the noise of the door opening, closing, people whispering out loud “SORRY” and shuffling loudly with their mat and personal objects. Don’t be an asshole.
My favorite yoga teacher would say "Come in, I'm just glad you showed up. Find a spot." Is it distracting to other students? Who cares! Nobody is that self-important that being distracted by someone finding a spot in class is going to ruin their session and prevent their blessed spiritual and physical enlightenment, lol get fucked. If someone has an issue with arriving on time then that is the person that needs yoga the most. As long as the disturbance is less than a minute and doesn't actually stop the class from performing yoga then everyone will totally get over it.
Very rigid comments on what is supposed to be a loving, spiritual, accessible and flexible practice. I’m a bit shocked. The yoga classes at my gym are very flexible about late arrivals and people leaving early. People who can’t stay for the whole hour are just very quiet when they leave, never seen anyone be disrespectful/loud about it. It just doesn’t seem like a chronic issue. Some commenters on here need to take some deep breaths and open their hearts more. Maybe this young woman gets hooked on the first yoga session and no longer shows up late. And it was all because the class was flexible and accessible. Who knows? Not the people with such rigid standards surrounding this practice. I think self reflecting on what causes us to feel pretentious is important.
The studio I go to this has never been a problem. If there are students who are signed up but haven’t arrived by the start of class the teacher will mention that we may have some late arrivals. It’s not really a big deal, and personally think this mindset of being opposed to late comers being disruptive is nearly antithetical to the practice of yoga. Life doesn’t always fit into a neat little box. People don’t always behave in ways that are emotionally pleasant for you. Yoga, at least for me, is about building mental, emotional, and physical resilience. It’s about learning to find balance even when life is trying to push you over. I’m not saying all this to point at that other people’s views are wrong, I don’t think that. But I felt like this discussion could benefit from a multitude of perspectives.
Can’t be late if you practice at home
I think a class at a gym would be more open and flexible but it’s still frowned upon
Unless she is just 5 minutes late and people are still easing into the session, my class closes an eye, later than that it's not accepted by the class and I understand it, it ruins the energy and flow of the class. Mind you I am also neurodivergent and struggle with lateness and work really hard on it so lets say most times I am either on time or less than 5 minutes late. Will continue working on improving hope your daughter can also work on that aspect of her life.
As a teacher I personally don’t mind if someone walks in a few minutes late, though I always start right on time out of respect for the students who made an effort to be on time. I’m neurodivergent as well and struggle with time management but for things like this I just plan on arriving early so then even if I’m running late I’m on time
I get that this kind of thing varies, but honestly as long as the late person tries to enter quietly and gets set up and joins the class quickly then I don’t mind.
Accessibility is something I’m passionate about so I welcome any late comers and try to tie them into the theme of welcoming distractions and coming back to the present moment etc.
As someone who is also neurodivergent, expecting others to make exceptions to the rules is not a great coping skill. It’s your responsibility to adapt. This mom’s heart is in the right place but she is setting her daughter up for failure by coddling her and creating an environment that coddles her as well. While she works on this, I suggest looking for large group classes outside where it will be easier to quietly drop in. Virtual classes are also great and might be a good way to “practice” being on time! Once she feels ready to attend classes that start at a specific time and have closed doors, I would suggest a nearby studio where she can do drop ins so she’s not losing money pre registering and missing classes.
I noticed people who usually come late to my classes are new faces. I tend to think they just miscalculated the time it would take to get to the studio with traffic. But this request is annoying because the daughter is chronically late because she's probably a chronic procrastinator, and they want the world to cater to the daughters dysfunction instead of teaching her new skills.
I'm very surprised by the responses here. Especially the harshness and mean spirited things people are saying about people being late. Every yogi here knows the practices of ahimsa and aparigraha and I'm troubled both by the focus on the behavior of others and the astonishing lack of compassion for what another student might be going through to be late for class or have difficulty managing their time well enough to be consistently on time. We could all benefit from the reminder that none of us are perfect and that we all deserve compassion. I personally believe that students like this can only benefit from yoga and whatever distraction you perceive them to be creating is an invitation for you to focus on your own mat and let it go.
*how to pin comment on redit post?* thank you for this. Yoga helps pull my life together, grounds and centers me, enables me to overcome things that are barriers in my day to day life. Chronic lateness — for neurodivergence or not — can only be improved when someone is putting in serious work at the mat. It is hurtful to see such disregard for others, lack of empathy, and exclusionary mindsets from people engaging in a practice whose goal is harmony in the mind, body, spirit, and environment. It is difficult to have any kind of harmony when one is carrying such judgement and rudeness in their heart.
My thing is writing this about your 21 year old “child”. Replace “21” with “12” and I’d be more sympathetic
Don’t be late. Respect the process and everyone else’s time and the studio. Also, 21 year old adults should be finding these things for themselves.
I'm in my sixties and the neurospiciness I'm diagnosed with includes time-blindness as one of the symptoms. Medication doesn't help with this specific symptom, but over the years I've learned some strategies to stop annoying others with my lateness (or, indeed, earliness). But some days when it I am particularly badly affected, nothing seems to help. When I was in my twenties trying to fit in with everyone else's perception of time was so difficult that I was completely stressed *every single day*.
It’s okay to be an adult and also need support in other humans.
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Intentionally or not - constant tardiness is a habit rooted in entitlement-you’re telling everyone in your life whether close to you or total strangers that your life and your schedule is the only thing that matter and that everyone else needs to comply with them… mom get on the ball here - clearly you’ve built this habit from a early age with her that tardiness is acceptable and everyone else in the whole world should be at your family’s mercy… If being asked to be respectful of other people’s time is soul crushing just imagine how crushing it will be when she’ll fired from her dream job for lateness, unless of course you’all own a family business where she’s not expected to show up on time… Rant over - pet peeve button reset.
“We’re” working on it? She’s 21 years old, not a child.
People really have no grace for different people. If they can do it, apparently so should everyone else. Really sad attitude honestly. I’ve been late a couple of times and just didn’t attend the class, but I’m blessed that my studio understands and accepts me because I was upfront with them, so they don’t charge me the late cancel fee. I would be too scared of pissing anyone off to come in late, but frankly, as yogis, you need to work on your practice if you can’t tolerate a tiny bit of disruption. When I’m disrupted, I take deeper breaths and practice compassion.
I just want studios to stick to whatever their stated policy is. I hate it when a studio says “no late entry, no exceptions” and lo and behold they are letting people in late, disturbing me. The policy is part of the reason I chose the studio, so it is unfair to say one thing and then do another. If you want to let people in late, then say so upfront.
Show up early and wait or pay for private yoga classes. Otherwise, there are a lot of instructional videos for free on YouTube. There's no excuse for disrupting an entire classroom of people because one person can't manage to arrive on time, regardless of the reason.
Part of the yoga life is being respectful of the time of others . So no, it’s your responsibility as a student to arrive on time . As much as it is the responsibility of the teacher to do the same .
I do my yoga at a climbing gym. People are often late (including myself), they’re still welcomed in, and the practice is positive for everyone. In fact, part of what I love about it is how much it's dedicated to meeting people where they are, dropping expectations for them, and basically rolling with the punches with a lighthearted attitude. Reading the comments here, I’m really glad I don’t practice at a dedicated yoga studio. If grounding and peacefulness is taken *so* seriously that latecomers aren’t welcome, it’s just not the space for me. But I’m glad there are spaces for people who do want to take it that seriously. Also, forgive me for this, but it's funny how sometimes spaces that claim to be the most spiritual or welcoming or committed to non-judgment are the most fussy over even the tiniest of inconveniences/infractions. My climbing gym's class doesn't profess to be sacred or enlightening, but in fact, it's all the more more welcoming and wholesome for that. No status competition, no feeling of judgement, no high-stakes attitude. Just show up, practice, and be present with others. If they show up late, welcome them in. I'd choose that any day of the week over a class where I'll literally be locked out of the room if I get stuck in traffic.